A Tale of Two CEOs
by Hunkeydorey
Summary: Christian and Ana both are CEOs of fortune 500 companies based in Seattle. They meet at an informative meeting about BDSM and sparks fly. Later on, Ana experiences rape (trigger warning). How will the attack change her? Will her quick and intense romance with Christian survive? Will she remain a strong leader? Will trauma ultimately defeat her or make her stronger? HEA guaranteed.
1. Chapter 1: The Munch, Part 1 (APOV)

**Chapter 1: Anastasia at the Munch, Part 1** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"Are you sure about this, Kate?" I asked my best friend as our clicking heels echoed across the lobby.

"For the fiftieth time, YES! I'm sure about this!" she yelled back at me. "You were made for this lifestyle, and it's time that you find out about it in a safe environment from more than just me. You're going to meet people tonight who think like we do, and it's about fucking time!"

Heads turned as we made our way towards the elevator that would take us to the Mile High Club. I prided myself on always appearing calm and collected, but at the moment, I felt anything but. I hadn't felt this paranoid in a long time. Did anyone recognize me from the tabloids? Since appearing on the cover of _Fortune_ last month, and being featured in _Forbes_ the month before, I had been followed by the paparazzi or by crazy admirers everywhere I went. It seemed they were just waiting for me to slip up, so they could discredit me. I had been forced to hire a personal security team because of the attention I had started receiving, but I had given my Close Protective Officer, Luke, the night off tonight, mainly because I didn't want him to know about my "research." No way in hell was anyone who worked for me going to find out about my interest in BDSM. I had worked my ass off and taken great risks to become one of the top CEOs in the country, a fight made even tougher by my gender... the glass ceiling is real, my friends, and breaking through it can leave you with cuts and bruises. I was not willing to throw all my hard work away, no matter how sexually repressed I felt. And no way in hell was I going to let anyone in the business world find out that the woman they recognized as always in control secretly longed to give up that control, just for the sexual fulfillment that it would bring.

"Should we have put our masks on before we entered the building?" I asked Kate as we waited for the elevator. Why didn't I think about that beforehand? Did the people turning their heads to watch us know where we were going? How many people knew about the event happening in the Mile High Club tonight? I didn't have to ask what would happen if word got out that Anastasia Steele, CEO of Ismintis International, a Fortune 500 company, was seen attending a BDSM event, even if it was just an informative get together, which I now knew was called a "munch," and that there would be no playing going on. Once the media got wind of this, it wouldn't matter that this was my first time to ever attend such an event or that I was still learning about this lifestyle. In spite of my billionaire status and my expert public relations team, my reputation would be tarnished. Stakeholders would take note. My company would be damaged.

Kate ignored me as we stepped into the elevator. Once the doors closed, she opened her bag and took out both of our masquerade masks. She smirked as she handed me mine. "Just chill, Ana. Take a deep breath. You're going to love this. And nobody is going to recognize you. That's why we chose a masked mulch. The other people here want to protect their identities too. They have just as much to lose as you do. So relax."

"I seriously doubt that," I muttered. I looked in the mirrored wall of the elevator as I slipped my mask on. My hair was down, curling around my shoulders and flowing down my back. As part of my professional look, I always wore my hair up in a tight bun; it was one of my two trademarks. The other was my oversized tortoise shell glasses, which I also left at home tonight. I always wore my glasses to work and to business meetings in spite of my 20/20 vision. When I started my company, I realized quickly that I would have to work harder than any man to be taken seriously. I needed to downplay my sex appeal, which I did by dressing the part; in addition to my signature bun and glasses, I only wore skirts that touched my knees, and I kept my dress blouses buttoned high enough to hide my cleavage. I wore clothes that fit me well; I didn't try to hide my figure, but I didn't show it off either. No one would describe my attire as "sexy." When the photographer from _Fortune_ did my photo shoot, he tried to get me to wear my hair down and to wear a sexy dress. I gave him an ultimatum: I would choose my look or there would be no photos taken. I got my way, as I always do.

"Do you think we're overdressed?" I asked Kate nervously. "This is just a munch. People don't usually dress up for munches, do they?"

Kate rolled her eyes. "They don't dress up, as in no fetish wear. But the Mile High Club not only is one of the hottest clubs in Seattle, but it also has an upscale restaurant, which is where this meeting is happening. We look good. In fact, I haven't seen you look this hot since we were in college. You should do this more often. It's nice to see you looking like a girl instead of your usual butch look."

"It's not a butch look," I argued. "It's business professional."

Kate rolled her eyes and didn't respond. She knew by now that it would do her no good. I didn't care if people like Kate thought I looked like a lesbian when I went to work.

"So you're sure nobody will recognize me?" I continued to worry.

Kate sighed loudly and sounded annoyed as she answered, "As I've explained repeatedly, that's why we chose this particular munch. It's masked. It's anonymous. It's safe. Nobody will recognize you, hotshot."

I looked down at my little black dress and then at my shoes. The designer cocktail dress fit me like a glove and showcased all my best features. I was showing more cleavage than I had in years, and my back was almost completely bare, which made wearing a bra impossible. I felt more comfortable with my Louboutins, even though the heels were a bit higher than the ones I usually wore with my business suits. But I felt good about my appearance tonight. No one would suspect Anastasia Steele was behind this mask. I did not look like myself but I liked how I looked.

Two hours later, I felt totally at ease. Most of the people present were clearly submissives and were open and easy to talk to. Even the few Dominants who'd shown up were relaxed and not at all as intimidating as I had expected them to be. Now, Kate and I were seated at a table laughing at how hard she had worked to convince me to come to the munch tonight.

"... I mean, you have to admit," I laughed, "it is pretty damn ironic that my best friend is into this shit too. I'm just glad that there were so many other subs to talk to tonight. It's different talking to them than to you, Madame Katherine."

Kate laughed. "Of course it is. Do you believe me now, that submissives aren't all weak and brainless? It takes a great deal of strength and courage to be submissive. I tell you that all the time, Ana. Do you believe me now?"

"Getting there," I answered. "I just can't tolerate somebody thinking I'm weak."

"If a Dom thinks you're weak, he's not the Dom for you," Kate responded.

I shivered a little. "The Dom for me. Scary thought."

"You want it, Ana," Kate insisted. "Admit it. I've known for years that you craved this. I saw it in your eyes when I told you about my first experiences with it, in college. I didn't think you'd ever come over to the dark side though. And I'm still not convinced, when it comes down it it, that you will. You still may be too chicken shit to attend a play party. And I can just imagine how you'll respond if you feel intimidated by a Dom... You'll probably go all CEO Anastasia Steele on him, and then he'll never believe you're a sub."

"OK, as fun as it is talking about how chicken shit I am, sadly I have to pee. Maybe by the time I get back you will have figured out how to get me to a play party where I can remain as anonymous as I've been here tonight. Oh, and stop using my name. I'm Daisy, remember?"

Kate snorted. "So fucking bogus. If you needed to use a fake name, why couldn't you choose something normal? Mary. Susan. Jennifer. Amy. Even fucking Jane would be better than Daisy."

"Hey, I like daisies. They're happy," I said as I got up and started towards the restroom. I turned back towards the table and added before I walked away, "And anyway, fuck you, Madame Bitch."

I could hear Kate still laughing as I entered the restroom. I took care of business and touched up my lipstick. Before leaving the restroom, I looked in the mirror at the sexy goddess looking back at me. I looked nothing like one of the most successful female CEOs in the country, but if the glow on my cheeks was any indication, I was just as in my element here as I was in the boardroom. I was having fun for the first time in a very long time.

As I left the restroom and headed back to our table, I heard a loud crash behind me, and I turned to look, wishing for a moment that Luke was there. But someone had merely dropped a glass, which had shattered on the floor. No danger there. I turned back towards our table, and as I did, I ran into a brick wall. Or at least, that is exactly what it felt like. It was actually a wall of solid muscle. I almost fell, and I clutched the man's arms to steady myself.

"Oh, excuse me, I'm so sorry," I breathed as I looked up at the most gorgeous face I have ever seen. His mask covered only his eyes, and his five o'clock shadow only enhanced the lines of his cheekbones, which were so perfect they could have been carved in stone by a master sculptor. His gray eyes stared back at me, looking straight through me, I felt. His copper hair was tousled and oh so sexy. Even in that first moment of seeing him, I could easily recognize that he was the sexiest man I'd ever seen.

"Watch out! Are you OK?" he spoke at the same time that I did, his deep voice reminding me of melted butter, and then he held me as I steadied myself. As I looked in his eyes, I wondered if he felt as attracted to me as I did to him. I wondered if he felt the same charge of electricity that I did. I wondered if he wanted me as much as I wanted him.

"Yes, thank you," I replied after a moment, finally looking away from him, but only after glancing at his kissable lips. God, those lips could do things to me; I instinctively knew it. I could feel my cheeks burning as I continued, "I'm sorry I ran into you."

"No, no, I think it was I who ran into you. I think we were both distracted by the commotion behind us. Please, may I walk you to your table?" He didn't wait for me to reply as he took my arm and walked with me to where Kate was watching the show that we had just inadvertently given her. I could see her smirk under her mask, and I knew that she had one eyebrow raised like she always did when she was interested in something I was telling her.

Mr. Gorgeous pulled my chair out for me. "Do you mind if I join you," he asked as he sat down.

"Not at all! Please join us!" Kate responded even though he was clearly directing the question to me. "How nice to meet another Dom! There have been too few here tonight."

"Kate, how do you know he's a Dom?" I asked.

Mr. Gorgeous and Kate both sniggered. Before she could answer me, he did. "The fact that you're asking that tells me you haven't been to many events like this one. If you've been around long enough, you know how to recognize a Dom."

I wasn't offended that they were laughing at me; instead, I found his words funny, but I didn't want to offend him, so I kept silent. But he noticed my smile. "Is something funny?" he asked.

"Well, yes," I answered. "The fact that we're at a munch should tell you that I haven't been to many events like this. Kate here has been in this lifestyle for several years, but I'm new to it. I'm Daisy, and this is my first time at an event like this. So there you go."

Mr. Gorgeous smirked at me. "Daisy?" His mask covered his eyebrows, but I'm sure they were raised, questioning my choice of pseudonyms just as Kate had. "Well, that's very... inventive," he mumbled, earning a snigger from Kate.

I raised my eyebrows at him in indignation, which he couldn't see anyway because of my mask. "And you are...?"

"Thomas Hardy," he answered proudly. "You may call me Mr. Hardy."

I snorted. "And that name is more inventive than Daisy? Really?"

He gazed into my eyes, making me feel that we were the only two people in the world. We were both unashamedly ignoring Kate.

"What's wrong with Thomas Hardy?" Mr. Gorgeous asked. "It actually tells you something about me. Daisy tells me nothing about you except that you like flowers. What woman doesn't like flowers? It's useless."

We both ignored Kate's laughter. "So you like classic literature. I do too. Big deal."

"Yes, well, you're probably more of a Jane Austin kind of girl. Looking for your Mr. Darcy or Mr. Knightly? Someone who'll give you handpicked bouquets for your happily ever after." His tone was mocking, and I felt offended.

I snorted again. "At a BDSM event? Hardly! Well, it was a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Hardy. I'm sure you have better things to do than to continue wasting your time sitting here talking with an empty-headed, hopeless romantic, dreamy-eyed flower lover."

Instead of taking my hint, he called over the server and ordered a bottle of wine. Then he gave me a panty-dropping smile that showed off his perfect teeth. "I do like your smart mouth." Then he became more serious and continued, "It's unusual to find that in a sub. I have a feeling you aren't a typical sub, are you Daisy? No, there's nothing typical about you, is there?" His gaze penetrated me again, and I had to look away.

I looked at Kate and said, "You still didn't answer my question, Kate, about how you knew he was a Dom, and now I have the same question, Mr. Thomas Hardy... how do you know I'm a sub?" I managed to look at him again, but I couldn't look in his eyes. But I continued, "And don't say it's because you've been around long enough? What is it? What do you look for?"

"Everything about him screams Dom, Ana," Kate said. "Can't you see it?"

I answered, "Yes, I see it in his demeanor, although he was much more polite at first than I expected a Dom to be. He didn't order me back to the table; he said please. But the way he carries himself... the way he holds my attention with his eyes... yes, that screams Dom, I agree." I turned to Mr. Gorgeous and asked, "What about me, Mr. Hardy? Does everything about me scream sub?"

"Not at all," he answered, "Like I said, there's nothing typical about you. From the moment we met, your body language has been obviously submissive. The way your breath hitched, and your neck blushed when you first spoke with me. Your mask couldn't hide that. And the way you averted your eyes after making eye contact with me. You recognized me as a Dom right away, didn't you? Why did you even need to ask Kate how she knew I was a Dom, when you clearly already recognized the same things she did?"

"She hadn't even talked with you. She could tell just by looking. I was surprised."

"No, An... Daisy, that's not completely true." Kate argued. "I watched your little encounter with him, so I'd seen how you interacted together."

"OK, that makes sense," I responded to Kate, and then I turned back to Thomas Hardy. "Why is there nothing typical about me?" I asked.

He smirked at me. "None of the subs I know would talk to me like you're talking. But I like your smart mouth. And the way you excused me a couple of minutes ago..." He smiled suggestively. "I'm a Dom, and that behavior was pretty un-submissive, but I found that hot. I find you... hot. I could see you wearing a black leather corset with a whip in your hand." He looked thoughtful. "You could be a switch, I suppose. Do you like the idea of being a Dominatrix? Would you like to tie me up and have your wicked way with me?"

My face felt hot under my mask, and I was grateful that the server was prompt bringing our wine. I had time to recover from Thomas Hardy's tirade as the server poured three glasses of wine. "You're too astute for your own good. And no, I don't think I'd enjoy that."

Mr. Gorgeous smiled at me as he lifted his wine to his perfect lips. "That's what I thought, Daisy." He turned to Kate and asked, "What about you, Kate? How do you like being a Dominatrix?"

"It's who I am," she replied simply.

He turned back to me and said, "And I rest my case, Daisy. Kate's response was so different from your own. Simple. No blush, just the truth. It's who she is. Why should she blush at the idea of being herself? But your blush is adorable. And you should know, one can never be too astute. Your mask may hide your face, but your neck is still flushed again, all the way down to your delectable breasts. I must say, that shade of pink looks amazing on you. I find that even hotter than the idea of you with a whip. I'm no sub, so as hot as you would be as a Dominatrix, we just wouldn't be compatible, and that would just be sad. So let me ask you a different question. Do you like the idea of being tied up in my playroom and at my mercy? Does the idea of me making your gorgeous ass as pink as your beautiful breasts at the moment turn you on?"

I felt my blush deepen, and the glimmer in his eye showed that he noticed not only the flush making its way down my neck again, but also my intake of breath as I felt a surge of heat between my legs. I took a sip of wine. Before I could compose myself enough to respond to him, he leaned towards me, close enough to kiss. He smelled amazing, and I imagined that he tasted just as good. All I needed to do was turn my head toward him, and I could feel his lips against mine. I've never wanted a kiss so badly. He teased me by not touching me, not kissing me, even though he unquestioningly knew I wanted him to. I felt his breath brush my cheek as he whispered, "You know what, Daisy, you don't have to speak. You've already given me all the answer I need." He leaned back confidently and looked at Kate. "Well, look at that," he said. "I've been so captivated by your friend here that I've let your glass get empty." He picked up the bottle of wine and filled Kate's glass. Then he leaned over and topped off mine as well.

I finally recovered enough to speak. "I thought these events were alcohol free."

"Ah, so you've done your research," he responded. "If we were playing, we would stay alcohol free, that's true. In a scene, you want your senses to be fully alert, for the full experience. But we aren't playing tonight, are we?" He smirked at me again. "Unless you want to, of course. I'd like nothing better than to take you back to my place and show you my playroom. And make your wildest fantasies come true."

This time as his provocative words washed over me and caused me to blush again, I was able to respond, even though my voice quivered. "Thank you for the invitation, Sir, but I think I'll pass."

His smile continued to light up his face. "Well, that's disappointing, but I really liked it when you called me 'Sir' just now. Anyway, the bright side is that you can feel free to drink up if we aren't going to play tonight."

I smiled and said, "Mr... Hardy, we aren't going to play tonight. Like I said earlier, this is my first experience. Baby steps. Kate has been trying for years to get me to take this first step. She's responsible for my presence here tonight. I've been interested for a long time, but this is the first time I've ever talked with anyone other than Kate about this lifestyle."

Kate spoke again. "I've been trying for years to convince A... ah... Daisy... to attend an event. I've known she was interested in it since we were still in college, but it's taken about five years to get her to even consider a munch."

I rolled my eyes and said exasperatedly, "Ana, OK. My name is Ana. Sooner or later, Kate's going to fuck up, so let's just put it out there."

"Thank God," Kate mumbled.

"Well, this is enlightening," Thomas Hardy said, with a smug smile. "Thank you, Kate, that was very insightful." He turned back to me and said, "Ana... don't roll your eyes. It's not only rude, but also unattractive. Yes, you mentioned earlier that this is your very first munch. And I'd bet good money that you chose this one because it's masked. Relax, darling, your identity is safe here." He paused, and then said thoughtfully, "Ana. It certainly suits you better than Daisy, but it still doesn't quite seem adequate enough."

"Well, it's all you're getting for now, Thomas Hardy," I responded.

He smirked. "I can live with that... for now. God, I love your smart mouth." He turned back to Kate and asked, "How did you finally convince her? I'm glad you did, by the way."

Kate responded. "Well, this is the first munch I've come across that's masked. I don't think I could have convinced her otherwise, so you were right about that. She's really interested in BDSM though. In fact..."

"Thank you, Kate," I interrupted, "but I can speak for myself."

"Yeah, you can, if you will," Kate snorted. She turned to Thomas Hardy and asked bluntly, "Are you looking for a sub?"

He snorted. "Is that an offer?"

Kate responded, "I think you know you aren't my type, and you also know who I'm asking for."

I glared at Kate. "Once again, let me make this perfectly clear to both of you. I can speak for myself." I turned to Thomas Hardy and said, "Kate's a bit... premature in her 'offer' as you called it. I don't even know your real name. I know nothing about you except that you're a Dom and you like classic literature. I'm not even sure at this point that I even want a Dom. I'm still researching. I'm still learning. Let's not entertain questions we have no business asking just yet."

"Questions you've been asking for five fucking years," Kate muttered under her breath, but we heard her.

Thomas Hardy turned to Kate and said, "To answer your question, yes, I am looking for a sub, but I didn't come to this event tonight with that in mind. A munch isn't the best place for a Dom to find a sub."

"Why _did_ you attend tonight?" I asked suspiciously.

He smiled his million dollar smile at me again. "Well, that's easy, and it will start filling in some blanks for you since you so clearly want to know me better, Ana. I own this club. I don't host these events, but I provide the space for them. Every Thursday evening, the restaurant closes to the general public for a private event. What exactly the private event is... we keep that confidential. Everyone who works here signs a Non-Disclosure Agreement. There are various events, a lot of them charitable. My mother's nonprofit has an event here at least once a quarter. And we also have a munch here at least once a quarter. They are usually masked. When they are, I try to make an appearance whenever possible, although my busy schedule doesn't always permit it. But I happened to have some free time tonight, so here I am."

"You do realize that you just gave yourself away, right?" I told him. A quick google search will tell me your real name."

"I have every intention of telling you my real name before you leave here tonight, Ana. You both had to pass a security check and sign a Non-Disclosure Agreement in order to get in tonight. Besides, you have no desire to expose yourself by exposing me. I'm not worried. But why rush? This game is fun, isn't it? You had to check all your electronics at the door, so you can't google me yet. And anyway, why resort to google when you can just ask me anything you want to know?"

"We're ignoring Kate," I responded.

"You're right," he agreed. He took a card out of his pocket and wrote an address on the back. "It was nice meeting you tonight, Kate. What about you? Are you looking for a sub? And before you ask, no, it's not an offer." He smirked as he waited for her answer.

Kate smiled wickedly. "As a matter of fact, yes, I'm currently single. Why? Do you have someone in mind?"

Thomas Hardy nodded, "I do, but I don't want to tell you who he is. I want to invite you to a party where he'll be. It's tomorrow night, and you'll need this card to get in." He continued to hold the card, as if he were waiting for something.

Kate looked surprised. "Tomorrow night. That's soon, and I may have had other plans. I could cancel them though... if the party is worth it. Is this party worth canceling my other plans?"

Thomas Hardy snorted, "Well, I suppose that depends on what your other plans were and how much you enjoy private play parties."

"Well, that depends on the private play party," she responded. "I've been to a few parties that I'd rather never experience again. Weird shit even for me. They forgot the safe, sane and consensual part of BDSM. If you tell me this party won't be like that, I'll consider it."

His smile didn't waver as he said, "Whether or not you 'consider it' is up to you... I invited you because you're Ana's friend, and I'm interested in Ana. But no, I know the host of the party. He doesn't allow any 'weird shit,' as you say. There are rules everyone must follow. Like this munch, you have to check your electronics at the door. You have to bring a copy of a recent health record to prove that you don't have any STDs. You have to pass a security check like the one you did for this event tonight, but I'll vouch for you since you passed the one for this event. Also, you aren't allowed to bring knives, needles, or matches in your toy bag. And there won't be any alcohol served, although there will be food and water readily available. There are dungeon masters who are there to ensure everyone's safety. So yes, everything is safe, sane, and consensual."

"How many people will be there?" Kate asked.

"Usually... forty or so. Perhaps more," he answered.

"All in one house?" she asked. "I hope it's a large house."

"Yes," he nodded. Four floors, and only the top floor is off limits. The owner has turned his entire basement into the most elaborate dungeon you've ever seen. There are also rooms on the first and second floors of the mansion that will be in use throughout the duration of the party."

"Well...," Kate hesitated. "I think I'm in. I just need to find something to wear. It's been a while since I've been to a good play party. I assume people come dressed appropriately?"

"You assume correctly," he responded.

"You didn't mention any decency rules or no penetration rules," Kate commented.

"That's correct," he said. "I didn't."

Finally, I'd had enough of being left out of their conversation. Now who was being ignored? "Decency rules?" I asked. "I don't remember reading anything about that."

Kate explained, "Some clubs have rules that you aren't allowed to expose nipples or genitalia. Sometimes people hosting private parties have those same rules. It's a lot more fun when they don't."

I nodded. "And... no penetration rules... so some clubs don't allow you to fuck? Really? Why would you go if you don't intend to either fuck or watch others fuck?"

Thomas Hardy turned his heated gaze toward me but he didn't answer me. Kate laughed and said, "Good question, Ana. I don't understand it either."

For a few seconds none of us spoke, and Thomas Hardy kept his gaze on me. I squirmed a little. Finally, he asked me, "Which would you prefer, Ana? To fuck or to watch others fuck?"

My face heated again, and I cleared my throat. "Wouldn't you like to know?" I responded, trying to sound both cute and controlled, but I didn't feel either.

His gaze still didn't leave my face. "Yes, I would. That's why I asked you. Now, answer the question."

I felt so aroused when I heard his dominant tone, and my first instinct was to immediately obey him. But I wasn't sure how to answer the question. Which would I prefer? I don't know. Instead, I said, "I'm not your sub, Mr. Hardy. I don't have to answer your question."

He smirked at me. "Not yet... but you will be." He turned back to Kate and asked, "So, should I tell them to expect you tomorrow night?"

"Yes, tell them I'll be there. Will you be there?" asked Kate.

"I'm not sure yet," he responded. "That depends on Ana." He turned to look at me as he continued to speak. "Right now, I would like very much to have a private conversation with Ana, which is why I'm excusing myself from you. Ana, your first test as my future submissive is whether you can follow my instructions right now. Say goodnight to your friend, stand up, and come with me. If you feel afraid, don't. I'm safe. I simply want to talk with you. I promise not to hurt you until you ask me to."

I stared at him dumbfounded. "What if I don't want to come with you," I responded.

"Ah, but you do. Stop playing games. No, I take it back, don't stop playing games. I like games. But you will come with me, because you really want to talk with me." He turned back to Kate and said, "I'm going to place this card in front of you. Wait until Ana and I walk away to pick it up. My name is on the opposite side, which you'll need to be admitted to the party tomorrow. I would prefer to wait until the end of our conversation to reveal my identity to Ana." He turned back to me and smiled. "Now, Ana, say goodnight to your friend. Tell her to leave without you because you're going to be in deep conversation with your future Dom for at least the next couple of hours."

I was finding it both difficult to breathe and impossible to deny him. I closed my eyes and counted backwards from ten. After a few more seconds, I took a few deep breaths and opened my eyes to find both of them watching me. Kate looked a little worried, but Thomas Hardy had a smug smile. I looked at Kate and said, "I know how crazy this sounds, but I want to continue this conversation with him. I don't know if he's my future Dom or not, but I want to talk with him. I want to find out more from Thomas Hardy than just his real name. I feel safe, but call Luke when you leave and tell him where I am, just to cover all our bases. I'm going to stay. I can find my own way home. I will call you tomorrow morning." With that said, I turned to Thomas Hardy and said, "I will not leave this restaurant with you tonight, and I will not fuck you tonight. Where do you want to take me right now? I want Kate to know where I'll be."

He laughed out loud, and then he pointed. "You see that hallway over there?" We looked in the direction he pointed. "There are four private dining rooms. We will be in one of them. Are you hungry, Ana?"

I didn't answer him. Instead, I looked at Kate and said, "If I don't make it out of that dining room alive, Kate, you can have all my Louboutins, and my autographed Prince albums." With that, I stood and waited for Thomas Hardy to lead the way.

He put his finger over his lips to silence Kate before placing the card on the table in front of her, lightly kissing her cheek and saying good night. Then he took my hand and led me towards the front of the restaurant. As soon as his hand touched mine, I felt a surge of electricity, which he must have felt too, if his sudden intake of breath was any indication.

"Where are we going?" I asked, feeling alarmed. We were walking in the opposite direction from the private dining rooms he had pointed out.

"Relax. I need to talk with the maitre d. I know that none of the private rooms were reserved, but it's still possible that some of them are occupied. I want to be sure we don't interrupt anyone, and I want to make sure that no one interrupts us."

After he spoke with the maitre d, he led me to a private room and closed the door behind us. He pulled out my chair, and when I sat down, he put his hands on my shoulders. "Now, Ana. Close your eyes. Trust me."

Immediately, I closed my eyes. I realized that I did trust him, regardless of how foolish that was. He began to massage my shoulders and neck with expert hands. As I felt the tension leaving my body, I sighed. After a couple more minutes, he sat down across from me, picked up my hand, and looked me in my eyes. "Do you trust me, Ana?" he asked.

"Yes," I answered without hesitation.

"Good," he responded. He reached up and removed his mask. I examined his face, which seemed familiar to me. I knew in that moment that I had seen him before tonight, but in the dim light of the room, I couldn't place where. The thought frightened me. What if he was one of my employees? Or even worse, what if he was a journalist there to get a story? My trust in him wavered. "Your turn," he said.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," I responded. "Tell me who you are first."


	2. Chapter 2: The Munch, Part 2 (APOV)

**Chapter Two: Anastasia at the Munch, Part 2** _(Anastasia's POV)_

He reached up and removed his mask. I examined his face, which seemed familiar to me. I knew in that moment that I had seen him before tonight, but in the dim light of the room, I couldn't place where. The thought frightened me. What if he was one of my employees? Or even worse, what if he was a journalist there to get a story? My trust in him wavered.

"Your turn," he said.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," I responded. "Tell me who you are first."

"No," he responded. "You said you trusted me. Prove it. I promise I won't bite you. At least not tonight." He paused and added, "Remember, Ana, I also signed a Non-Disclosure Agreement. I won't talk to anyone about you. You have my word. I don't think I know you, but if for some reason we find out that I do, it won't change anything. But I think I would remember meeting you."

I took another deep breath, reached up, and took off my mask. Then I stared back at him, waiting for him to recognize me. "Do you know who I am?" I asked.

"Should I?" he asked. "Do you know who I am?"

"Should I?" I asked. "Like you said, I think I would remember meeting you."

He smiled. "So you don't recognize me?"

"Have we met? But I never forget..."

"No, I assure you we've never met," he interrupted. "But I'm kind of... well known. You may have seen me in... tabloids." He sounded disgusted as he said the last part.

"You're famous? Are you an actor?" I asked.

"No, just someone the public cares too much about," he replied. "I'm relieved that you don't recognize me."

"You do look familiar, but I can't place where I've seen you," I said.

He gazed at me for a moment. "You're even more beautiful than I imagined. I've been wondering all night what you looked like under that mask. Your skin is flawless. I can hardly wait to see the rest of you."

I raised my eyebrows as I responded, "You'll just have to wait. That's not going to happen."

"I know, I know. Not tonight. You made it clear that you refuse to leave with me or fuck me. I believe I could persuade you to do both, but I won't. Not tonight. I've never wanted to get to know a sub before. But I've never met such a... such an inexperienced sub before. Maybe that's it. There's just something about you, Ana."

At that moment, a server knocked on the door and entered. "Sir, can I get you anything?"

"Yes, could you please bring an appetizer sampler platter for us to share, six shots of tequila, and two glasses of ice water. Oh, and a bottle of Chablis."

When the server left, I said, "Six shots of tequila and a bottle of wine? Are you planning to get drunk or get me drunk?

"Neither," he answered. "Or maybe both. We'll see what happens. I want you to relax. And I want to play a game with you."

"I told you I'm not going to..."

"Not that kind of game," he interrupted, smiling smugly. "Not tonight anyway. Don't worry, sweetheart, we'll get to play soon enough. Tonight, I want to play a game where we get to know each other better. You want that too, don't you?"

"Yes, and you can start by telling me your name."

"Christian," he answered without hesitation.

"Christian?" I repeated.

"Yes, Ana. My name is Christian. Now it's my turn to ask a question. First, let me tell you how this game works. It's just your normal 'truth or dare,' except that if you refuse to answer a question or refuse to take the dare, you have to do a tequila shot. Maybe you played games like that when you went to parties in college... I don't know. I never went to parties like that. I just heard my brother talk about it a lot more than I cared to hear about. So what do you think? Sound fair?"

I considered it for a moment. "Yes, OK, I'll play," I finally answered.

"Great! OK, my turn. Truth or dare?"

"Truth," I answered.

"Of course. How many Prince albums do you have?" he asked.

I snorted. "Really? That's how you want to play? By asking something so random?"

"Hey, it's Prince. My parents adored him when I was growing up. I grew up with him always playing in the background. I almost cried when he died. OK, not really, but I was sad. My little sister did cry. So how many autographed albums do you have? Oh, and I have no concerns about wasting questions. We have the whole night. No question is insignificant."

"OK then," I replied. "I have four Prince albums, all from the 80s. All autographed. All passed on to me by my mom. And Kate will get them all if you kill me tonight."

Christian laughed. "I'm not going to kill you, Ana. Not tonight, not ever. And on that note, I think it's your turn. And before you ask, truth."

"OK," I said, and tried to think of a really insignificant question. "What's your favorite food?"

Christian didn't pause or blink an eye. "Mac and cheese. My turn."

"Wait, what? Do you mean the instant stuff out of the box that usually only kids eat, or do you mean the homemade baked kind that is popular in traditional Southern cuisine?"

Christian smiled patiently. "Does it matter? If I have to make it myself, the instant stuff. If my housekeeper makes it, the homemade kind. Satisfied?"

I smiled back at him. "No," I answered. "When was the last time you made instant mac and cheese for yourself?"

He chucked, but then he thought about it. "I'd say... probably when I was a college student. So, about ten years ago."

"You graduated from college ten years ago? You're older than I thought," I commented.

"It's not your turn, but I'll answer anyway," Christian said. "I didn't say I graduated ten years ago. I said I was in college ten years ago. I only attended two semesters. Now, my turn. Truth or dare?"

"Truth again. I'm going to need a few drinks before I'll be brave enough to take a dare," I admitted.

"OK," Christian replied. "Who is Luke?"

"Luke?" I asked.

"Yes, Luke. I assume you don't have a cousin by that name since you're not Daisy Duke. Well, you don't have a boyfriend named Donald Duck either, do you? Seriously, was that the best name you could come up with? Anyway, doesn't matter. That's not my question. Luke. You told Kate to call him. Who is he?"

"Ah, right. That Luke. He's my CPO... uh, Close Protective Officer."

His eyebrows shot up. "You have a CPO?"

"Is that your next question? It's my turn, anyway," I responded. "Oh, and for the record, I like the name Daisy. I do like daisies... not that you care what my favorite flower is since you're clearly not a hearts and flowers kind of guy. But the main reason I chose that name is because Daisy Mason is my favorite Downton Abbey character."

"Downton Abbey. Right. My mom and sister watched that. I don't have a clue what it is, but I remember them talking about it at family dinners. And for the record, you're right, I'm not a hearts and flowers kind of guy. I don't do them. Ever."

"Yes, well, been there, done that. Hearts and flowers can be sweet, but they can also leave you wanting... more. Moving on. My turn, right?"

The server entered the room with our appetizers and drinks. After leaving them on the table and asking if we needed anything else, he left quietly.

"I asked you earlier if you were hungry, and you didn't answer. But I doubt you've eaten much tonight, so please eat up." He picked up a chip, dipped it in avocado dip, and took a bite. Then he poured wine for both of us.

After I took a couple of sips of the wine, which was delicious, I ate a couple of chips with dip and then said, "It's my turn, Christian... or should I call you Sir?"

"For now, call me Christian," he answered. "You aren't my sub yet."

"You sound really sure of yourself that I will be your sub. You're certain that I'm going to eventually avert my eyes and call you Sir."

Christian responded, "I like you Ana. More than I've liked any of my former subs. When you become my sub, you'll neither avert your eyes nor call me Sir."

Now that I didn't have my mask to hide behind, I'm sure he saw the confusion on my face, as well as the desire. He picked up my hand from the table and began to rub my wrist. I found my voice, but it sounded small and shaky as I asked him, "Why not? Isn't that what subs do?"

"As Dom and sub, we'll do whatever the hell we want, whatever we've agreed to. It will all be in our contract. When you're my sub, you'll look at me. I've never had a sub look at me before, but I like your beautiful blue eyes, Ana. I like how expressive they are when you look at me now, so I can't wait to see how you look at me when I make you come. Yes, Ana, you must look me in the eye when you come. That's a rule I'm going to add to our contract. And you won't call me Sir. You'll call me Master."

I couldn't speak for a moment for fear that I would betray the arousal I felt. I almost whispered, "Master," just to hear how it sounded coming from my lips. But I didn't want him to know how much I liked the idea, so I remained silent.

Christian looked at me smugly, as if he could read my thoughts. "It's still your turn. Truth. What do you want to know?"

"What do you like to do in your free time?" I asked.

He responded, "I don't have much free time, but when I do, I have varied interests. Sailing, flying, soaring..." His voice trailed off.

"Follow-up questions allowed?" I asked.

"Sure, why not?" he answered.

"OK, sailing I get... Do you have a sailboat?" I asked.

"I do. Would you like to go sailing sometime?" he asked.

His invitation shocked me a little. "Umm... I don't know. Maybe. What did you mean by flying? You don't strike me as the Superman type."

He laughed. "No, I refuse to wear tights. I fly a helicopter. I have my own named Charlie Tango."

"You can fly a helicopter?" I'm sure he saw how impressed I was.

"Yep, and now it's my turn. You've barely touched your wine, so I assume you're still not ready for a dare. What kind of birth control do you use?"

"Whoa! I didn't see that coming," I said. "We're jumping right in to the personal shit, huh? OK, I have an IUD."

"Well, that makes things simple. How long have you had it?" he asked.

I thought for a moment. "Umm, a couple of years I guess. They're good for up to ten. I'd have to have it removed if I wanted to get pregnant. Not that that's ever going to happen."

"You don't want kids... ever?" he asked.

"No, not in the foreseeable future. I have other... priorities. What about you, Christian? Do you think you'll ever settle down and have a family?"

"No," he answered grimly. "That life is not for me. My turn again. How long has it been since your last fuck?"

"Holy shit, you don't mess around, do you? How long...?" I stopped and took a big gulp of wine. Then I calculated in my head, but gave up and said, "I broke up with Jose, my last boyfriend, in April of 2014."

"And you haven't hooked up with anyone since then, for two fucking years?" he asked incredulously.

"Correction. That would be two non-fucking years," I replied with a smirk.

"Good God, Ana, how...?"

"Easy, Christian," I interrupted him. "A vibrator and an active imagination. I think it's my turn. Truth or dare?"

"Truth," he answered.

"How did you become a Dom?" I asked.

"Well, there's a simple question with a complicated answer. I'll try to give you the simplified version. I was introduced to this lifestyle when I was in my teens. I subbed first, and then when I was twenty, I made two major life decisions. One was to drop out of college and start my own company. The other was to become a Dom. In both decisions, I was finally being true to myself. I wasn't a sub, even though I played the role for several years. I hated it, actually. I felt like I was born to be a Dom, just as clearly as I was born to run my own company."

I quietly processed his words. He ran his own company. Earlier he said he was well-known to the public. Could we be any more alike? And surely, I must know him from the business world.

My thoughts were interrupted by his next question. "My turn," he said. "Ready for a dare yet?"

"Umm, no," I replied.

He smiled. "Good, because I want you to tell me about your first fuck. What was it like?"

"Seriously?!" I squeaked.

"Oh yes, Ana. Seriously," he responded. "Or you can always drink tequila instead. We can always order more if we drink all of these."

I swallowed. "I have a feeling I better answer now because I may need the tequila later. But I will take advantage of the wine." I finished my glass of wine and paused for another moment before I answered. "What was it like? Umm, pretty fucking horrible, excuse the pun. First boyfriend. Final year of college. I made him wait. We dated for three months until I finally gave in and gave it up. He lasted for... maybe two minutes. No foreplay. No cuddling afterwards... not that I need that, mind you, but I thought I did at the time. But no, it was just a quick fuck. He popped my cherry, and he was done. And then... what do you suppose I did? Stupidly, I decided to give him another go at it, to see if he could improve. He didn't. I stayed with him for another month before I broke up with him, and I never had an orgasm, at least not from him. I had to get myself off. There now, did I answer your question?"

"Very well, and your blush is even more adorable now that I can see your face. But can I ask some clarification questions... just to be sure I heard you right?" When I nodded, he asked, "Are you saying you were a virgin until your senior year of college?" I nodded again, and he asked, "How is that even possible? You're gorgeous, Ana. I'm sure you had guys hanging all around you. How...? And... why?"

"I just... never wanted to. And when I finally did, I wondered what the big fuss was about. You want to know the really ironic part of waiting until my final year of college?" I asked. When he nodded, I said, "If I had it to over again, I'd still be a virgin to this day. How would you have liked to have popped my cherry, Christian?"

"Oh, hell no," he responded adamantly. "I've never fucked a virgin. Never want to. This lifestyle is not for innocent virgins."

"Yes, well, I'm not so sure about that. I've had some very intimate conversations with Kate, and... I crave it. I've never had an experience that I enjoyed enough to want to do it again with the same guy. I've done it again, but only with the hope that it would improve. It didn't."

Christian looked shocked. "You're saying that you've never had a sexual experience that you enjoyed. Ever?"

"Never," I affirmed.

"Damn. Now I regret promising not to fuck you tonight. That's just sad. We have to remedy that soon, Ana. I can at least get you off tonight even without fucking you."

"God, Christian, you can't say things like that to me," I said.

He leaned towards me, took my hand in his, and said seductively, "I can and I will. And I won't say it without delivering. I promise you, Ana, that I will make you come before you leave this room tonight." He sat back and gave me a look that challenged me to question him or deny him. I didn't. I was trying too hard to maintain my composure.

Finally, I spoke. "It's my turn. Which means it's your turn to tell me about your first fuck."

"That's not very original of you, and how do you know I wasn't ready for a dare?" he responded, looking uncomfortable.

"True, it's not original, but it's what I want to know." I was surprised to see something that seemed like fear or embarrassment in his eyes. "There's always the tequila," I added. Then I tried to lighten his mood by adding, "Oh, and I didn't ask you because I'm not ready yet to dare you to do what I want to dare you to do."

He smirked at me and said, "You don't have to dare me, baby, I'm going to do it either way." Then his face grew serious. He stared at a shot of tequila for a moment before he answered. "No. I never back down from a challenge. Remember that about me, Ana. My first time..." He took a deep breath, reached over and grabbed a shot of tequila. "Maybe we should bend the rules about the tequila. I'll answer your question, but only after some... liquid courage. I need something stronger than the wine." He downed the shot before he continued, speaking quickly. "One of my mother's friends had me doing some yard work behind her house. She brought me a glass of cold lemonade and stood there talking to me while I drank it. She asked me something, I forget what, and I smarted off at her. She slapped the shit out of me. I was so shocked that she caught me totally off guard when she kissed me. It was deep and erotic. I'd never kissed a girl at all... and that wasn't a normal kiss. It was the kind of kiss that sucks your brains out of your head. I was a hormonal teenage boy. And I wanted her to do it again. She told me to come back the next day. I did. She took me into her house, showed me her playroom, and told me what she wanted to do to me. I agreed. She tied me up, beat the shit out of me, and then sucked me off. When she untied me, she got down on her hands and knees and told me to fuck her. So I did. She came, and then I came. Then she beat me again for coming without her permission. That was my first time. We fucked like that for five years."

"Holy shit!" I exclaimed. "Now I understand why you needed the tequila. Christian, you told me a minute ago that this lifestyle isn't for innocent virgins, but that's exactly what you were. Good God! Holy shit!"

He smiled sadly. "You want to know me? I want you to know me." He paused, and we were both quiet for a moment. Then he added, "Ana, I've never told anyone that story before. Nobody knows except my therapist. My family have no idea. My brother Elliot is the only one in my family who knows about my lifestyle, but that's only because he's into it too, not because he knows how I got started."

"Holy shit!" I whispered.

"Yeah, you said that already. I believe it's my turn. You ready for a dare yet?"

I refilled my glass of wine and took another gulp of it. "You know what? What the hell. Dare."

"Give me your panties," Christian responded.

I stared at him in shock for a moment before I asked him, "What makes you so sure I'm wearing any?"

"Don't play coy with me, sweetheart. Your very first BDSM event, which you only attended because it was masked. You may have been brave enough to leave off the bra because of that sexy dress you're wearing, but there's no doubt in my mind that you're wearing panties. Sexy ones. A thong. I guess a red one. Silk or lace?"

I took another gulp of wine, stood up, reached up my dress, and pulled down my panties. Christian watched me carefully, with darkened eyes, undoubtedly hoping for a peep show, which I refused to give him. My dress was short enough that he was already seeing enough of me. I slipped off my red silk thong and tossed it to Christian without speaking. What was there to say?

Christian smiled triumphantly as he caught my thong in midair. Lucky guess, I wanted to say, but I didn't. Instead I watched in shock as he brought my thong to his nose and sniffed deeply. "Damn, you smell delicious," he said.

I squeezed my legs together, and he noticed, but he didn't say so. He simply smirked at me. I took another gulp of wine before I asked him, "Truth or dare?"

"Dare," he responded almost before I stopped speaking.

After another gulp of wine, I said, "I dare you to kiss me."

"Oh, gladly," he replied. "Where would you like me to kiss you?"

"Where?" I asked.

"Where," he confirmed. "You have to be specific, sweetheart. If you give me carte blanc, then my mouth is going to be on your sweet pussy before you can blink."

"Oh, holy shit!" I muttered. "My lips. These lips on my face."

That made Christian chuckle, but then, before I knew what was happening, his lips were on mine, and I felt like I was on fire. Holy shit! He tasted like an incredibly delicious mixture of tequila and mint. I wouldn't expect those flavors to taste so good together, but on him they were out of this world. And my entire body was tingling, burning. God, I wanted more of him. What was happening to me? I had kissed plenty of guys, but none of them had ever made me feel anything close to this.

I'm not sure how long Christian kissed me because time seemed to stand still, but after a while, he pulled back and gazed at me. Clearly, the kiss was affecting him the same way it was affecting me. He stared at me in awe for a moment before he said, "I never kiss my subs. But that was incredible."

"Yes... incredible," I agreed. "And... umm, I think it's your turn. Truth."

Christian paused a moment, in thought, before he said, "I'm not sure how to phrase the question. I want to know how much you already know about BDSM. I want to know if you have any firsthand experience with it yet. I take it you've only had really bad vanilla sex up to now, but maybe you've played around... Or maybe everything you know is through research. I guess I'm trying to get at how much I'm going to need to teach you."

"OK, that's way more than one question, but why don't we just turn it into a conversation, so you can find out what you want to. My experience is easy to answer. My last boyfriend was a super sweet guy. But, as you can guess, boring as hell in bed. So I tried to convince him to spice things up a little. I suggested roleplaying. Bondage. God, I long for bondage. Holy Hell, should I be telling you that like that? Too late. Anyway, he thought I was a freak. Actually called me a freak. He said normal people don't have sex that way. I basically told him to fuck off. We were both nicer about it than that, but that's the long and short of it."

"Asshole. No wonder you haven't wanted to fuck for two years. Do you believe any of what he said?" Christian asked.

"Correction again, Christian. I never said I haven't wanted to fuck for the past two years, just that I haven't. I've been busy building my company, and that's where my focus has been. But to answer your question, no, I don't believe what Jose told me about myself, but I did at first. It's only through conversations with Kate that I've realized that I'm not a freak for wanting what I want. 'Normal' is a relative term."

"And what exactly is it that you want?" he probed.

I shouldn't have needed to think about the answer, but I wasn't sure how to put into words what I wanted. "God, how can I explain that, especially to you, knowing that you want not only to fuck me, but to top me? Kink, I guess?" I answered. "I'm not even sure... I've been talking with Kate for years, listening to her stories, but have really only just started exploring this for myself. And by exploring, I mean taking action, like coming here tonight, not just fantasizing about it. So I guess I need to learn more from firsthand experience before I'll really be able to articulate exactly what I want. But I know that I love the idea of multiple orgasms... and whatever it takes to get there."

Christian snorted. "From the sounds of it, you'd be happy with just one orgasm that you don't have to give yourself. But I'm going to make sure that you have so many you'll lose count. I promise."

I pressed my legs together and took a deep breath. I glanced quickly at Christian, and leaned over and grabbed a shot of tequila. I downed it before he even realized it was in my hand. Then I continued. "There's more, to answer your question about what I want. I like the idea of a play party, although I'm terrified at the same time. I want to watch other people playing. Yes, I really want to watch other people beat and fuck each other." My voice trailed off as I felt my face flush again with embarrassment.

"Ah, so my little Ana is a voyeur," Christian teased. "Hey, don't sweat it," he continued when he saw that my embarrassment continued. "Most people who are into BDSM have at least a little bit of voyeur in them. Most have a lot. Why else do you think we have play parties? We're either into voyeurism or exhibitionism or both. Otherwise, we'd fuck in private. To be honest, up to now, that's how I've preferred it. Want to know another secret about me, Ana? I've never taken a sub to a play party. I've always taken them to my playroom, just the two of us. But I like the idea of taking you to a play party. I've been thinking about it since I sat down at your table earlier tonight. I had it in mind when I invited Kate because I figured you'd be more inclined to go if she was there. Anyway, what is it about it that terrifies you?"

I picked up another shot of tequila. "You're right about these being more useful for liquid courage than to avoid questions or dares... at least so far." I downed the shot and then answered his question. "Pain. I like the idea of bondage and domination. A lot. I want to be tied up. I want to be dominated. I want to be fucked really hard and ordered to obey your every whim. Just the idea of that turns me on. But the punishment aspect of it scares me. I don't particularly want to be beaten. I don't want to hurt so bad that I cry. I don't cry. Ever. I'm not weak. I don't want someone to make me feel weak."

Christian studied me for a moment. "What are you more afraid of," he asked, "pain or humiliation?"

I pondered that question for a moment as I returned to my wine and sipped it. "Humiliation, I suppose. I don't like the idea of pain, but the idea of being humiliated... no. Just no. I've worked hard to be respected. I deserve to be respected. If I have to give up respect, I don't want to be a sub. No fucking way."

"So you'd be willing to feel some pain, especially if you knew it would lead to multiple orgasms and didn't lead to humiliation?" Christian pressed.

I blushed again. "Yes, as long as it didn't hurt too badly," I answered.

"You know you'll have your safe words, right?" he reminded me. "If the punishment is too much, you just say 'Red,' and I'll stop immediately. No more pain."

"Yes, but doesn't that make me weak?" I asked. "Shouldn't I be able to handle it?"

"No," he answered. "If it hurts too much, you say 'Red.' It doesn't make you weak. You would be weak to let me do something that you hated, that truly hurt you. Don't do that, Ana."

I was glad to finally have these questions answered, so I pressed him. "But isn't the point of being a sub pleasing the Dom? If I'm going to please you, don't I have to accept what you give me, even if it hurts?"

Christian shook his head. "I won't be pleased if I hurt you so badly that you don't want to be with me any more. And that's what would happen if you didn't use the safe words. Eventually, it would be too much for you. No, Ana. A sub accepts pain because she likes it. Hell, you're going to reach a point where you'll disobey me on purpose because you want me to punish you. I know you don't believe me yet, but after you've been punished and realize how much you like it, you'll believe me then."

"What if I don't like it... any of it? Ever?" I asked.

"Ana, I'm not saying you're going to get off on pain like some subs do. But you're a sub, sweetheart. You are. You're already regretting the boundaries you set earlier because you really want me to tie you up and fuck you, right here, right now. You're longing for me to dominate you, aren't you, sweet Ana? I'm not going to fuck you tonight, but we both want it. And the fact that you want bondage so badly tells me that you're going to like pain, at least to some degree. You're afraid because you haven't experienced it yet, but we'll go slow. We'll have to find the right level of pain for you, that you like, and we'll never go further than that. That's why we have the safe words. 'Yellow' means we're getting close to your limit, and if you say it in the middle of a punishment, I won't hit you that hard again, but I won't stop hitting you. 'Red' means I've gone too far. Hopefully, we'll never get that far, because if you use 'Yellow,' I'll never have a reason to get that far, but if for some reason we do, the punishment will end immediately. Do you understand what I'm telling you, Ana?"

"Yes, I understand," I answered. "If I don't like it, I use safe words. Using them doesn't make me weak. I can accept that."

Christian asked, "Do you feel better now about the idea of pain? I will punish you, Ana... Does that idea still scare you?"

I thought about it. "No, not as much. I feel relieved by your explanation. I'm still nervous about it. But... it's more like the nerves I felt before I went bungie jumping. Or sky diving."

"You've been bungie jumping and sky diving?" he asked excitedly.

"I have," I replied. "Only once for each, but I enjoyed both."

"You're going to love soaring with me," he said under his breath.

The server knocked on the door and entered. "Can I get you anything else?" he asked as he cleared away the appetizers which we had eaten almost all of."

Christian ordered another bottle of wine. "Do you think we're going to need more tequila?" he asked.

I laughed. "So far, we're using it more for courage to answer rather than to avoid questions. And there are still three shots left. So, no, I think wine will be fine." When the server left, I said, "I think its my turn. Truth or dare?"

"Truth," he answered.

"How many subs have you had?" I asked.

"That's easy. Fifteen," he answered.

"Can I ask you some questions about them to make up for that BDSM conversation we just had?" I asked.

"Sure," Christian answered. "Hell, you can meet some of them if you want to. If you go with me to play parties, you probably will at some point anyway."

"Christian, why the hell would I want to meet your former subs?" I asked.

He looked a little confused. "I don't know. They just do. Some of my former subs have met each other. They find out shit I like from each other." He shrugged.

"If I want to know what you like, shouldn't I ask you?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered. "Yes, you should. Well, if we go to a play party and see any of my former subs there, I'll point them out to you. Talking to them is up to you. But be warned; I'm sure they'll want to talk with you."

"That just feels... creepy," I said.

"Whatever, Ana," Christian replied. "The truth is, you still have a lot to learn about this lifestyle. So don't judge until you learn."

"Touche," I responded. "Point taken. OK, can I ask some more questions about your subs?" When he nodded, I asked, "Why did your agreements with your subs end? I mean, how and why?"

"It varied," he answered. "But it almost always came down to the same reason. We wanted different things. For most people in this lifestyle, agreements don't last beyond a few months. That's normal..." he trailed off and then added under his breath, but loud enough for me to hear, "unless they get too attached."

"So, none of your subs fell in love with you?" I asked.

"I didn't say that," he answered, seeming annoyed. "I said we wanted different things. I sure as hell never fell in love with any of them. I didn't have a romantic relationship with any of them. It was only physical, with no emotional bond, ever."

"So they were just 'fuck buddies'? I pressed.

"Not even buddies," he answered. "That implies that there's a friendship. No, Ana, I've learned more about you in the past hour that I ever learned from any of my former subs, even after ending a six month agreement. I never talked with any of them the way we've talked tonight. Fuck partners is a more accurate description. So, it makes sense that they found it more interesting to move on to experience others than to stay with me longer than a few months."

The server returned with our wine, which he poured for us. "That's all we'll need for the rest of the evening," Christian said. "You can go now." The server left, closing the door behind him.

I took a sip of wine before looking Christian in the eye and asking, "Is that what you want from me? A fuck partner. Sign your contract, have great sex for six months or less and then move on?"

Christian stared into my eyes for a moment, as if he could see all he way to my soul. I wanted to look away, but I forced myself to hold his gaze. "I don't know," he finally answered. "I'm sure you feel this... thing between us. I felt it as soon as I bumped into you tonight. I felt some kind of connection with you, Ana, and that's new. I knew I had to talk with you. Now, I know I have to fuck you. After that, I don't know. I want to know everything about you. I can't imagine having enough of you after six months. And I think it would be impossible now for us to merely be fuck partners because of what we've already shared here tonight. I've revealed more of myself to you after knowing you for only a few minutes than I ever have with anyone. And I don't know why. This is so odd, so unlike me... but... I like it. But I think that we should start with a six-month contract. That seems reasonable. A lot of the rest of it will be up to you."

I sighed. "Up to me, huh? You know I still don't know jack shit about being in a BDSM... is relationship even the right word? Agreement? Whatever. I don't know what I'm doing. Sure, I've done research. I've read a lot. I've joined in chats online. But none of that prepared me for being here in person. You're easy to talk to. But what happens when you get me in a playroom?"

Christian laughed. "Multiple orgasms, that's what. After that, you just won't care."

I shivered and took another drink of wine. "Christian, I'll tell you another secret about me. I never admit when I'm afraid. Never show fear, never appear vulnerable. But I'm admitting to you, I'm afraid. And I'm not talking about pain now. I can't explain right now why I'm so afraid, but... a lot is at stake, I'll put it that way. How can you be sure about any of this?

Christian smirked at me. "Oh, baby," he said under his breath. He picked up my hand and began to trace the lines in my palm. "You didn't expect to feel this turned on, did you? Your first conversation with a real Dom, and you're dripping wet, aren't you? You're aching for me to touch your nipples, aren't you? You think I don't see how they're straining against your dress, or how hard they get every time I say something that turns you on? Nice touch, leaving off the bra. I want to touch you, Ana. And I will, but not yet. But I will, baby, and I'll make you come, just as I promised.

I picked up my glass and sipped my wine, not knowing how to respond to Christian, and still stuck in my own fears.

He interrupted my thoughts. "Whatever it is that has you so worried, let it go. I'm going to take care of you. It will be my job as your Dom. So, relax, and let's get back to our game. I think it's your turn. Truth. What else do you want to know?" he asked.

I swallowed. "How do you choose a sub? Do you have a type or something?" I asked.

He looked a bit uncomfortable. "Yes, I have a type," he responded. "Beautiful fair skinned brunette submissive. I've been matched with most of them, but I met a couple of them at play parties. You're the first one I've met at a mulch."

"I thought you said you didn't go to play parties," I said.

"I said I've never taken a sub to one. I've gone when I've been between subs. I like to watch people play too, Ana, you're not the only one. My, umm, introduction into BDSM didn't include play parties. I subbed for my Dominatrix in her playroom, that's all. She never took me out in public. Maybe that's why I've almost always played privately since I've been a Dom. But I've gone to a few play parties over the past couple of years. My brother Elliot invited me to my first one. He thinks he introduced me to this lifestyle because I had never been to a play party. I've never corrected him."

I was curious. "So... when you've gone to play parties, you've only watched? Have you ever played?"

He smirked. "I've played."

"But you said you didn't take your subs," I said.

"There are subs there who are... unattached. If they don't have a collar on, they're fair game. It's easy to hook up with a play partner. That's why people attend, if they're unattached. Elliot always goes solo to these events because he likes to play with as many women as he can in one night."

"Ugh!" I exclaimed. "I hope he takes plenty of condoms. That's disgusting!"

"Stop judging, sweetheart," Christian responded.

I sighed. "Alright, you're right," I replied. "So how many girls have you ever played with in one night?"

Christian answered, "Well... I'm a single-focused kind of guy. I have played with two subs at one time before, at a play party a couple of years ago. I didn't like it, because I felt distracted by one while playing with the other. I've shared subs with my brother in the past too, but I realized from that experience that I don't like sharing. It just didn't work for me, so from then on, I've only played with one at a time. That was how I met two of the fifteen."

"So there were others who didn't become one of the fifteen?" I asked for clarification.

"Yes, of course," he answered, and then looked pointedly at me. "I've fucked more than fifteen women, Ana. Don't ask. I have no idea how many."

"OK, Christian. I don't want to know," I responded.

"But you need to know this... As I mentioned, I don't like to share. When you're mine, Ana, you will be only mine. Our exclusivity will be outlined clearly in our contract. I'm monogamous in my relationships. You'll be mine, and I'll be all yours too. No cheating."

I thought about his words for a moment. "So am I going to be number sixteen, Christian? Is that what you think?" I think I may have slurred my words a little, which made me realize that since we'd come into the private dining room, I had drunk two shots of tequila and I'd lost count of how many glasses of wine, not to mention the glass and a half of wine I drank earlier with Kate. And now I was on my third glass of the bottle that Christian had just ordered not too long ago. I was drinking too much and too fast.

"God, I hope so," he responded. "I've never had to work to convince a woman to be my sub, but I'll work for you, Ana. I want you. I've never felt like this before."

We both sipped our wine for a moment. I knew I needed to stop and drink some water, but I didn't. This conversation was heavy. I needed the liquid courage.

After a few silent moments, Christian asked, "Whose turn is it?"

"I have no idea. I think I'm a little drunk," I answered. "But you can go. Truth."

"Have you ever had an orgasm through vaginal penetration?" he asked.

"Shit," I responded. "Yes, I'm drunk. OK, I guess this is good. Christian, meet uninhibited Ana. I'll tell you any fucking thing you want to know, and a few things you didn't want to know. Oh, and tequila does make my clothes fall off, so good move in ordering those shots. I think I'll have another one." I picked up a shot and downed it. "Would you like me to get naked for you now? Oh God, I'm in trouble."

Christian didn't look concerned. He simply watched me with interest. "I'll decide when I want you to take your clothes off, Ana. You're keeping them on for now. Answer the question."

I laughed, and then groaned. "Has a guy ever made me come simply by fucking me? No, Christian. Happy? Does that make me a freak, or do I just have some kind of disorder? What is erectile dysfunction if you're a woman? Do I need a little blue pill? Maybe you can cure me. Will you make me come by fucking my pussy?"

"Yes, I will Ana," Christian promised calmly. "But not tonight. But soon. So, how do you get off?"

I snorted. "Are you asking me how I masturbate when I'm alone or how I come, if I'm lucky enough, when I'm fucking somebody?"

"I'd like to know the answer to both questions," he responded.

"OK then," I responded. Before I answered, I took another long sip of wine. "Preferably with a vibrator. In my bed. Dreaming about a sexy Dom like you who has me tied up and is forcing his cock down my throat while eating my pussy."

Christian laughed and looked excited. "Damn, Ana, I would have gotten you drunk earlier if I knew you would get this uninhibited. God, I was already hard, but you just made me harder. Are you going to remember this tomorrow? Because I really want you to remember how I make you come later."

"I'm not that drunk, Christian," I responded. "I've never been so drunk that I couldn't remember what happened. And no, I've never really taken my clothes off after too much tequila... at least not if there were people around. So yes, I will remember when you make me come. And I want you to make me come like a freight train. But I still won't let you fuck me tonight."

"I wouldn't fuck you now even if you begged me. Not tonight. You're too drunk. I'll only fuck you when I can be sure that you're consenting with your full wits about you."

"Well, that's noble of you," I snorted, and then I paused. "It feels like there was still something I didn't answer yet. Wasn't there?"

"Yeah," Christian answered. "Tell me about your orgasms that you've had during sex."

I snorted again, very unladylike, "You mean when I play with my own clit and nipples so I can rush to get off before he does. Because if he beats me there, all bets are off."

"Haven't any of the men you've dated ever cared about meeting your needs?" Christian asked, sounding shocked.

"Christian, it's not like there have been many of them. I'm not like you. I can count them all on one hand. With three fingers, to be exact." I held up three fingers, and then added a fourth. "You'll be number four. Would you like me to tell you about these fine fuckers?" I asked, wiggling my fingers. I didn't wait for him to respond. I held up only my index finger and said, "The first one was a Class A prick. Didn't last long. Horrible sex." I added my middle finger and said, "The second guy was better. My first blowjob. He went down on me once, and that actually made me come. But other than a couple of times, sex was usually boring. Missionary style almost every time." I added my ring finger and said, "Then there was Jose. I mentioned him, right? Nice guy. Until he wasn't. Until he called me a freak. He was boring as hell, just like the first two." I added my pinky finger. "The jury is still out on this little guy."

Christian laughed. "The jury is still out on how little that guy is, which you'll find out soon enough that he's not."

I rolled my eyes and slurred, "What is it about men and their penis size?"

"Don't test me, Ana. You aren't my sub yet, so I won't punish you. But I told you already not to roll your eyes. If you roll your eyes when you're my sub, I will punish you."

"In that case..." I rolled my eyes again. "Maybe you'd better put that in your contract and smoke it, Mr. Dom, so I don't forget it when I want you to punish me. What's with that, anyway? Everybody rolls their eyes."

"It's rude, and so not you. Not beautiful."

I snorted. "Or maybe you're just upset that I implied you have a small penis."

Christian chuckled confidently. "Yeah, that must be it." He grabbed ahold of my middle finger and said, "It sounds like this guy has given you your best fucks so far."

"You mean my finger, or the guy it represents? Because I'm leaning towards my finger if we're comparing." I giggled, and then continued, still giggling. "But no... I know what you're asking. Paul was his name. He did get me off a few times, I'll give him that." I grew serious and looked Christian in the eye as I continued, "But we didn't get along well outside of the bedroom. See, here's something you need to understand about me, Christian. I want to be dominated in the bedroom... or playroom, or whatever. Tie me up and fuck my brains out. I crave it. But outside of sex, I am in charge of me. I decide what to give you control over. Don't try to control my life. Don't even try. If you do, things will end pretty quickly between us."

Christian was watching me calmly. "Ana, can I show you something?" he asked.

"That depends on what it is that you want to show me, Christian," I answered as I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively, causing him to smile smugly.

"Lift your right foot and put it on my knee," he commanded, using what I'm sure was his Dom voice. It was hot. Really hot. I felt heat between my legs and had to squeeze my thighs together before lifting my foot and resting it on his knee under the table. Immediately, he started unbuckling my shoe.

"Your shoes are sexy as fuck," he said as he removed the shoe and began to caress my ankle.

"Christian, what are you doing?" I asked breathlessly.

He leaned towards me and whispered, "Ana. This is what I wanted to show you. I want you to get to know this little guy." As he spoke, he rubbed my foot against his erection. "This is what you do to me, Ana."

"Christian!" I exclaimed. But I didn't remove my foot. I had never felt as turned on as I did at that moment. His penis felt huge, and it got even larger as I rubbed my foot against him.

"Don't stop doing that, Ana," Christian said as he eased his hand away from my foot and began to caress up my leg. I continued to rub his cock with the sole of my foot as Christian's hands moved up my legs. When he reached my thighs, I moaned and closed my eyes. "Open your eyes, Ana," Christian commanded. As soon as my eyes snapped open, he shifted back in his seat and lowered my foot to the floor. "What do you want?" he asked, still in his Dom voice.

"Umm..." I wasn't sure how to answer. I wanted him to fuck me. In fact, I had never wanted sex as badly as I did at that moment. I felt like I would combust if he didn't touch me. But I had told him in no uncertain terms that I wouldn't fuck him tonight, and he had already said that he refused to because I was drunk. So where did that leave me? I was too drunk both with wine and with lust to think beyond that.

"Tell me what you want, beautiful," Christian commanded.


	3. Chapter 3: The Munch, Part 3 (APOV)

**Chapter 3: Anastasia at the Munch, Part 3** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"Tell me what you want, beautiful," Christian commanded.

My voice trembled as I answered, "I want you to kiss me again."

Immediately, Christian moved toward me and cupped my face in both hands. He turned my face towards his, and the next thing I knew, his lips were on mine. Just like before, I felt on fire. Never had a kiss been so full of electricity, or of promise. I never wanted it to end. We kissed like that for several minutes before he broke away. He moved back in his seat again, looked me in the eyes, and asked again, "What do you want?"

I remembered his promise then, and I knew what he wanted me to say. "I want you to make me come."

"How?" he asked.

How? Surely he would know how. Why was he asking me? Did he just want to hear me talk dirty? Or was he testing me to see how good of a sub I would be? Assuming that was it, I answered, "However you want... M.. Master."

He sucked in a breath and stared at me in shock. Then he smiled delightedly. "I like it. From now until you come, only call me Master. My God, you have no idea how alluring you are, do you? You're fucking perfect."

"Not perfect, Master, but anxious to learn how to please you," I answered.

"Holy shit," he muttered to himself. Then he looked in my eyes and commanded, "Stand up." I obeyed him immediately, and he pulled my chair away from the table. "Now, sit down on the edge of the chair, lean back, and spread your knees so I can see your pussy."

"Yes, Master," I whispered as I obeyed him.

Christian sucked in a breath. "So fucking beautiful. Your pussy lips are dripping wet for me. I can see how much you want me. Are you regretting your decision to not let me fuck you?" he asked.

I thought about that for a moment and moaned my response. "Yes... No... I don't know, Master. I want you... but it's too soon. I'm not ready yet. I mean mentally. I'm obviously ready physically. Oh God!"

"I love that you're waxed smooth. But why are you, if you haven't fucked in two years?" he asked.

I felt my face burning again but I answered him truthfully, "I like how it makes me feel."

"And how is that?" he asked.

"Sexy," I answered.

Christian commanded me, "Remove your other shoe." As I obeyed, he walked over and locked the door, and then walked towards the window, which was covered with heavy curtains held back by an ornate cord on each side. He removed the cords and returned to the table, where he knelt in front of me. "We haven't spoken at all about limits yet, so I'm letting you know what I'm doing, and if you object to anything, you have to tell me. Just say no or stop. You don't need any other safe words tonight. Now, I'm going to tie your ankles to the chair, my sexy little goddess."

"Yes, OK, Master," I responded. I'm sure he heard the excitement in my voice.

Christian kept eye contact with me as he said, "Very good, Ana. Spread your knees a bit wider and put one leg on each side of the chair. I'm tying your feet to the back legs, so move your feet so they're touching the back legs of your chair."

"Yes, Master," I responded as I obeyed.

"Beautiful," he said, as he finished. "Now I have you where I want you, all exposed to me and at my mercy. And now, I'm going to tie your hands behind your back too, Ana."

"Yes, please, Master," I responded excitedly. "Tie my hands. Tie me up. Oh, God!"

He watched me hungrily as he removed his tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt. Then he moved behind me and used his tie to secure my hands to each other and to the back of the chair. As he did that, he said, "Ana, here's another thing you need to know about being my submissive. When we're in a scene, you will not be allowed to speak except to respond to my questions or to use a safe word. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master. I understand," I answered.

"God, I love that you're calling me Master. That's new too. I've rarely allowed my subs to call me Master. Only a couple of them ever did."

"Why not, Master?" I asked.

Christian looked in my eyes as he explained, "It's a term not to use lightly. I want to be your Master, Ana. I want that more than I've ever wanted another sub." Christian sat down in the chair next to mine, put one hand on my knee and caressed it. "Do you have any idea how beautiful you are right now?" he asked. "Do you feel how hard you've made me? Do you know how much I want to fuck you? Are you ready to come apart in my hands?"

"Yes, Master," I said, trembling.

Christian leaned towards me and pressed his lips against mine. The kiss was even more electric than our earlier ones, probably because I couldn't move, and his hand was moving up my leg. I moaned into his mouth as he reached my center, and his middle finger sank into my hot core. He began to move his finger in and out, adding his index finger. With his thumb, he reached up and stroked my clit, and I almost came undone. Meanwhile, Christian never stopped kissing me.

This continued for a few minutes, and I felt myself getting closer and closer to the edge of the cliff. But then, out of the blue, Christian stopped all movement. He pulled his fingers out of me, sat back, and looked at me.

"What?!" I cried. "Please, Master!"

"Please what?" he asked. "What do you want, Ana?"

"Master, don't stop. Keep fucking me with your fingers. Please, Master, I want to come," I begged him.

"What will you give me if I make you come?" he asked as he began to caress my knees with both of his hands.

"Oh God!" I cried. "What do you want, Master?" I asked. "What can I give you?"

"There is one thing I want," he responded. "If you promise me, I'll finish the job for you." As he spoke, his hands kneaded my legs as he moved them higher.

"What is it, Master. Please tell me," I continued to beg.

"I want you to attend the play party tomorrow night with me. You know, the one I invited Kate to. I want you to go as my sub, wearing my collar. You don't have to sign a contract with me yet. We don't have to play, but we can if you want to. What I want you to promise me is simply that you will go with me. That's all."

I breathed heavily, thinking about all he was asking. "Oh my God. Master, you've never taken a sub to a play party, and I'm not even your sub yet. Why me? Why do you want to do this?"

Christian answered, "Because you want to go. And I've already told you that I want to go with you. I want to experience your first play party, Ana. I want to watch the expressions in your beautiful eyes and feel the reactions in your body as you get turned on by what you're seeing there. And I think after that experience, you won't hesitate to sign a contract with me, because you want to be my sub, you're just afraid that this is all happening too quickly." As he was speaking, Christian put his hands on my breasts and started playing with my nipples though the thin fabric of my dress.

"Oh my God, that feels good! Oh God, Chri... Master!"

Immediately, he stopped touching me. "Will you go?" he asked.

I moaned in frustration. "And if I refuse, you'll leave me hanging?" I asked, frustration evident in my every breath.

Christian smirked, put his hands back on my legs, and massaged my inner thighs for a few moments without speaking. I closed my eyes and moaned as I got wetter. Finally, he spoke. "From what I understand, it won't be the first time a man has left you unsatisfied." With that, he removed his hands from my legs, sat back, and waited for me to react.

"No, no, no! Please, Master, don't stop! OK, I'll go! I'll go with you to the party!"

"Is that a promise?" he asked.

"Yes, I promise!" I answered.

"I want to hear you say it, Ana," he said. "I want you to promise me that no matter what happens when we walk out of here tonight, no matter how you feel about tonight's encounter when you wake up in the morning, no matter what, you promise that you will go with me to the play party. You'll wear what I tell you to wear and do whatever I tell you to do at the party. That last part, by the way, is just to insure your safety. I won't ask you to play. That will be your choice. Do you promise?" he demanded.

"Yes, yes, Master, I promise," I answered.

"I want to hear you say it," he demanded.

"OK, Master," I said. "I promise that no matter what happens, I will go with you to the play party, and I will wear what you tell me to wear, and I will do what you tell me to do. You have my word."

"And I place great value on that word, Ana," he responded gently. Then he pinched both my nipples, shocking me so much that I yelped. He spoke again, "Naughty Ana, I love that you're not wearing a bra. Do you realize that your dress is so low cut that all I would need to do is pull it down a few inches to expose your breasts?"

I moaned, earning another pinch of my nipples from him, but then he began to rub them both. "Oh my God!" I responded.

"Answer my question, Ana."

"Yes, Master, yes I know," I whimpered.

Even before I finished speaking, he had pulled down my dress, fully exposing my breasts. "Even more gorgeous than I expected. Your skin is flawless. And your nipples are the perfect shade of pink." He palmed both breasts and continued, "And just the perfect size for my hands. And my mouth. I'm going to lick them and suck them while I finger fuck you to oblivion."

"Oh, God, yes, Master. Yes, please do that!"

He immediately covered one with his mouth while his fingers pinched and pulled the nipple of the other. I moaned. He kept this up for a few minutes, and then he switched breasts. I felt like I could come just from the attention he was giving my breasts, but then, I felt his fingers on my thigh, and then, finally on my pussy again. He kept playing with my nipple with one hand while with his other hand, he gave new meaning to the concept of finger fucking. He obviously found my g-spot, which no man had ever done before. I felt like I was going out of my mind, and I loved it.

"Ana, promise me that you won't fuck any more limp dicks who don't know how to make you come. You are a goddess. You deserve this. Now, look me in the eyes while you come for me, baby!"

I opened my eyes and locked them on Christian, who was watching me with something that looked like wonder. "Oh, God!" I screamed as I jumped, or rather flew, off the cliff. The orgasm went on and on, and Christian's fingers continued to pump in and out of me, milking all of it. Our eyes did not leave one another's, and I felt like I was falling in more ways than one. And it terrified me.

"So fucking beautiful," Christian breathed. Then he kissed me slowly and tenderly. He ran his fingers through my hair before he reached behind me and untied my hands. "There's nothing wrong with you, sweetheart. Not even one flaw. Those three men just didn't know how to fuck, that's all. Let them go. I'm going to take care of you now," he promised as he untied my feet. He massaged my ankles, and then my calves.

I closed my eyes and enjoyed the feel of Christian's expert hands on my legs. Then I realized that my breasts were still naked. I reached down and pulled up my dress.

"If you were my sub, I would punish you for what you just did," Christian said. "But I'll let it pass since you didn't know any better, and you're not my sub yet."

"What did I do, Master?" I asked.

"Ana, you've had your orgasm. You don't need to call me Master now. You're not my sub yet. Call me Christian. And what you did was that you covered yourself. You pulled your dress up over your perfect breasts before I was finished looking at them. But like I said, you aren't my sub yet. When you're my sub, after a scene, you must wait for me to either dress you myself or give you permission to dress. There will always be aftercare, which is what I was doing by bringing the circulation back to your legs. Now, drink some water. You need to sober up a little before we leave here."

I obeyed him, and as I drank, he moved behind me and massaged my arms and shoulders. For a few minutes, we were silent, as I enjoyed the massage. Finally, I asked, "Is this... aftercare? Is it a normal part of BDSM?"

"You like it?" he asked.

"I think you know the answer already, that I like it a lot," I replied.

He laughed, as he continued to massage my back. "Yes, it's normal. Any good Dom will always provide aftercare. If I've punished you, I'll rub cream on you to prevent bruising. This wasn't a scene... not really. After we do a scene, you'll be exhausted. You'll need to sleep. I'll take care of you." He leaned over and kissed my neck.

I sighed. I could get used to this. "I guess multiple orgasms will do that to a girl," I mumbled, feeling the exhaustion overtake me.

He chuckled. "You'll find out very soon," he replied. He continued to massage down my back, and then he returned to my legs. It felt amazing.

At least ten minutes had passed when Christian patted me on the back and sat down in the chair beside me. "Well, Ana, I think it's time we call it a night. It's late, and I have to work tomorrow. I'm sure you do too."

I opened my eyes and looked at his perfect face again, taking him in, just in case I wouldn't see him again after this.

"Don't worry, baby, we'll see each other again in just a few hours," he reminded me. "I'll send you instructions about the play party. I just need your phone number."

"My phone number," I mumbled. Did I want to give him my phone number? After all this, couldn't I trust him that much? Come on, Ana, give him your number.

"Better yet, I'll give you mine, and I'll send you the information you need after you've let me know that you've gotten home safely. I'll worry about you if you don't text me." He took out his card, the same card that he had given Kate earlier in the evening, and he handed it to me.

I stared at his card, processing the words written on it. Christian Grey. Grey Enterprise Holdings. Christian Grey. Phone number. Address... this was the GEH address, which I recognized.

I glanced back at him, and realized for the first time that I was looking at the face of Christian Grey. As realization hit me, and shockwaves rolled over my body, I felt like I couldn't breathe. Christian Grey. My idol. My model. The one business leader whose advice I had followed unfailingly. And the CEO of GEH, my business rival. The man who was currently trying to put me out of business. And I had just spent the past... how many hours?... having the most intimate conversation I've ever had with a man. I just had an orgasm in his hands. I just promised to be his sub at a play party. Holy shit!

"Oh, God! Oh my God! Christian Grey! You're Christian Grey!" I exclaimed. Immediately I felt bile rising up in my throat. I had to get out of there. I ran to the door, threw it open, and ran.

"Ana! Your shoes!" I heard him call after me. I ran to the restroom and made it there just in time before vomiting violently. I then went to the sink and washed my face, rinsing my mouth as best I could. Christian Grey was all I could think about as I looked at my reflection in the mirror. Could things get any worse?

He was waiting for me when I exited the restroom. "Ana, are you OK? Honestly, I wasn't expecting that reaction. I would have told you who I was earlier if I'd known..."

"I've got to go!" I stuttered. "I've got to get out of here!" I felt tears stinging my eyes. I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry, I willed myself. I went to the elevator and pushed the button.

Christian followed me to the elevator, of course. I realized for the first time that the restaurant was empty. We had stayed well past closing hours. I guess that didn't matter since Christian owned the restaurant. Of course, Christian fucking Grey owned the Mile High Club. How did I not know that? And how the hell did I not recognize him? My fucking idol, for Christ's sake! How could I not know who he was?

Christian spoke gently, as if I were a wild animal that he'd cornered, which wasn't far from the truth. "Ana, it's late. Let me take you home. You can't drive; you've had too much to drink. My driver will..."

"No!" I shouted. "Leave me alone, Mr. Grey!"

Christian looked shocked, as if I had slapped him. "Mr. Grey? Ana... has tonight meant nothing to you?"

"Oh my God!" I said, as I pushed down another wave of nausea that was trying to make its way up. I turned away from him so he couldn't see the tears stinging my eyes. I do not cry. I must not cry. I must not let him see me cry. Oh my God, I submitted to him. How much more vulnerable could I possibly have made myself? Oh shit! I let my biggest business rival tie me to a chair and finger fuck me. I'm fucked. I'm done for. How will I ever live this down?

Finally, the elevator saved me. "Good night, Mr. Grey," I said, as the elevator doors mercifully closed, effectively separating us. The last thing I saw was Christian staring at me in shock, still holding my shoes.

"Oh fuck," I muttered as I looked down at my bare feet. I realized too late that I didn't have my purse or phone. I had known before coming to the event that electronics weren't allowed, so I'd left my phone at home. And I had left in such a state that I forgot my purse. I had no money, no cards, no ID, nothing. Not even my jacket, which I had also checked in. Hell, I wasn't even wearing panties. Christian Grey still had my fucking panties. I would have to walk the nine blocks to my apartment building wearing nothing but my thin cocktail dress... in the middle of the night, in the cold. And it was beginning to rain, of course. It was fucking Seattle; of course it would be raining. And did I mention that I was barefoot? Why did I ask earlier if things could get any worse?

"Ana!" a male voice called out. Oh shit! Why did Christian have to come after me? No, no, no!

"Ana Steele!" the voice called again, getting closer.

I realized that I recognized that voice, and it wasn't Christian fucking Grey, who thankfully didn't know my last name. "Luke! How did you know...?"

"Kate called. I checked your apartment, and you weren't home yet, so I came here. I've been waiting here for the past two hours. Where the hell are your shoes?"

"It's a long story," I said, as I got in my warm car. Thank God for Luke. "Just take me home, Luke. You have a key, right?"

"Where is your key, Ana?" he asked suspiciously.

"I forgot my purse, and I don't want to go back for it. The restaurant is closed now anyway, so I wouldn't be able to get back there anyway. I'll get it tomorrow."

"Did you forget your shoes, too?" he asked.

"Something like that," I responded. I shivered, and he turned up the heater. I managed to hold back the tears. I couldn't let Luke see me cry either. That would be totally unacceptable.

Back in my apartment, I filled my bathtub and soaked for an hour. Finally, in the privacy of my bathroom, I could have a good cry. I hadn't cried like that since my mother died. Sleeping now was out of the question. My brain was too full. Christian fucking Grey. If this had happened three months ago, I would be on Cloud Nine. He was my hero. I'd read everything about him that I could get my hands on. How the hell did I not know him? Christian Grey is a genius; I knew that. Christian Grey is sexy as fuck; I did not know that. Christian Grey is a Dom; I didn't know that either. And now, Christian Grey knows some of my deepest, darkest secrets. But then, I know his too. He told me things he's never told anyone, so he said. Holy shit!

My cell phone buzzed, telling me I had an incoming text. It was Kate, wondering where the hell I was.

I texted her: _Christian Grey murdered me at the Mile High Club. You can have all my shoes, not just the Louboutins. Except for the pair I left there tonight, when I ran away in my bare feet. Thank God you sent Luke._

 **Kate:** _Are you OK?_

 **Ana:** _No. I'll never be OK. He showed me the meaning of life with only his two fingers. And I didn't even know who the fuck he was._

 **Kate:** _You like him, don't you?_

 **Ana:** _Are you insane? It's Christian fucking Grey. GEH. Arch enemy. Satan himself. He wants to shut me down. He's stealing my business, one piece at a time. Hell no, I don't like him! I hate him!_

 **Kate:** _Did you tell him who you were?_

 **Ana:** _No, I didn't. But I'm sure he'll find out. Probably already has._

 **Kate:** _What are you going to do?_

 **Ana:** _I'm going to go to work in a few hours. I'm going to try to forget that tonight ever happened. And I'm going to try to forget I ever heard the name Christian Grey._


	4. Chapter 4: Who Was That? (CPOV)

**Chapter 4: Christian, after the Munch, Part 1** _(Christian's POV)_

I stared at the closed elevator door for several seconds, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. She'd trusted me enough to let me tie her up. My God, her breasts were beautiful, and the taste of them... like vanilla and honeysuckle. I was already craving more.

"Taylor, who was she?" I asked as he stepped into the room, ready to leave with me. He had been in the security office since the restaurant had closed earlier.

Taylor stared at me for a moment before responding, his face betraying nothing, but I knew him well enough by now to recognize that he was shocked that I didn't already know the answer to my question. "Sir, that was Anastasia Steele," he answered.

"Anastasia Steele?" I repeated in shock. "As in... Ismintis International? That Anastasia Steele?"

"The one and only," he answered as we got into the elevator.

"Fuck!" I responded. "No wonder she was so freaked out."

Taylor glanced at me. "Sir, no offense, but how did you not recognize her?"

"Did you see her?" I asked. "Did you see her hair? Gorgeous. She's never worn it down in any of the photos I've ever seen of her. And she left those hideous glasses at home too. It didn't look like her. And besides... she didn't know me either. How is that even possible?"

Taylor looked skeptical. "Are you sure she didn't know you, sir? Perhaps..."

"No," I cut him off. "She was being real. She honestly didn't know me."

"Well, sir, perhaps she shouldn't have left her hideous glasses at home," Taylor quipped. But as usual, his sense of humor was short lived. "Anyway, Welch is already working on her background check. He'll email it when it's complete."

I nodded in acknowledgement. I knew he would get Welch to start the search as soon as I disappeared into the private room with her tonight, but I didn't expect the results to be in before morning. Taylor spent a few minutes of our drive back to Escala briefing me on security for the evening. There wasn't much to discuss since everything had gone smoothly at the munch. I knew that opening up the restaurant at the Mile High Club for a BDSM event was risky, but I also recognized that there were few public places for events like it, and people like my Ana who were just beginning to explore this lifestyle needed safe public places to go where they could meet others in the lifestyle and have conversations.

My Ana. Was she my Ana? Would she ever be? Damn it, yes, she would be mine, but how? I spent the rest of our drive home in silent contemplation.

When she'd realized who I was, the first thing she'd done was bolt to the restroom and vomit. I literally made her sick. What the hell was that reaction for? Anastasia Steele of Ismintis International would consider me a business rival at the very least, but why should she become so violently ill over that? Embarrassed yes, but she was worse than embarrassed.

I thought back over our three-hour conversation. My God, what ever possessed me to tell her so much about myself? What possessed me to want to talk with her in the first place. But even as I asked myself the question, I knew not only that I would do the same thing all over again, but that I wanted more. I wanted to ask her more questions, to know her more, to tell her more of my secrets that I'd never told anyone else. My God, I asked her to go sailing with me. When have I ever asked a woman to go sailing? Never. And when she told me about going sky diving and bungie jumping, all I could think about was taking her soaring. I wanted more of her. I wanted more than just to fuck her, and that was new, and I didn't understand it. I was more than intrigued by the delectable Ms. Steele, and I needed to talk with Flynn. Thank God I already had an early morning appointment with him.

I thought over all that Ana had revealed about herself to me. Steele was the right name for her; she was indeed, unquestioningly, as hard as steel. Strong. More like diamond. Unbreakable. And she had submitted to me. She wanted to submit to me again; she wanted me to be her Dom; I had seen the longing in her eyes.

Vulnerability was something that Anastasia Steele never allowed herself to show, but she had willingly made herself vulnerable to me, not because of any weakness in herself but simply because she wanted to. She wanted me. She told me that she never showed fear, just as she confessed her fear to me. Of course, she felt terrified that if word got out that she was into kink, it would damage her business. Was I not afraid of the same thing? Was that not why I protected my privacy so carefully? And in learning my identity, I'm sure that her worst fear had been realized. Not only had someone from the business world learned her secret, but it was me... her top business rival. I'm sure that's how she saw me, as her rival. I don't really see her as competition since I'm worth probably four times what she is. But then, GEH has been around longer, and she's done an incredible job leading Ismintis to be one of the fastest growing companies in the world. She has an incredible business mind. So yes, I understand why she's afraid that I'm going to reveal her secret and damage her reputation. She has nothing to fear though. She could damage me just as easily as I could her. Neither of us wants that.

What I do want is Anastasia Steele. Just remembering the look in her eyes as she came apart in my hands made me hard again. Could she see into my soul with those piercing blue eyes as clearly as it felt she could? God, I hope not. I don't want her to see the rottenness there. But I couldn't resist her eyes. And her kiss. Her taste. No one else has ever even come close. My God, I've got to have her.

As Taylor and I silently took the elevator up to my penthouse at Escala, I realized that I already considered Anastasia Steele mine. She would be mine. No matter what the obstacle was that had caused her to freak out on me, I would win her. I always get what I want, and I wanted her, plain and simple.

I went immediately to my office and opened my email, eager to see if Welch had sent Anastasia's background check yet. "Yes!" I shouted when I found that he had, and I opened it immediately. What I found there was even more impressive than I had expected:

 **Name:** Anastasia Rose Steele

 **D.O.B.:** September 10, 1988

 **SSN:** 522-11-6822

 **Address:** Escala, Penthouse D

1920 4th Avenue; Seattle, WA 98101

 **Personal Cell Phone:** 206-535-9009

 **Work Phone, Direct Line:** 206-289-3535

 **Personal E-mail:** anastasia1989 

**Work E-mail:**

 **Occupation:** CEO, Ismintis International

1625 5th Avenue; Seattle, WA 98101

 **Personal Assistant:** Hannah Smith

cell: 206-833-4682; office: 206-289-3900

 **Education:** Executive MBA: University of Washington, Foster School of Business

Graduated May, 2013 GPA: 4.0

Bachelor of Science: Stanford University

(Double Major: Economics & Communication; Minor: Urban Studies)

Graduated May, 2011 GPA: 3.89

GMAT Score: 762 (Date: 2012)

SAT Score:1634 (Date: 2006)

 **Bank Info:** BECU: Savings: $34,956,893 Account #302589

BECU: Checking: $8,789,967 Account #302564

Chase: Savings: $15,766,342 Account #654578

Chase: Checking: $5,594,131 Account #654579

Credit Suisse: Savings: $1,235,323,755

Net Worth: Est. $7,180,500,000

Inconclusive

 **Properties:** Escala, Penthouse D (4 bed, 4.5 bath, est. val.: $4,600,000)

Maui, Hawaii Beach House (5 bed, 4 bath, est. val.: $2,800,000)

Savannah, GA Townhouse (3 bed, 2.5 bath, est. val.: $275,500)

 **Family:** Adoptive Father: Raymond Steele

DOB: Dec. 7, 1969

Married Carla May Wilkes: Oct. 3, 1991

Adopted Anastasia December 14, 1991

Divorced Carla: Dec. 1, 2001

Sole custody of Anastasia from January 2005

Birth Father: Franklin A. Lambert

DOB: Sept.1, 1969; DOD: Sept. 11, 1989

Cause of death: accidental

Mother: Carla May Wilkes Adams

DOB: July 18, 1970; DOD: Aug. 5, 2014

Cause of death: Car accident, head-on collision with drunk driver

Stepfather: Robert Charles (Bob) Adams

DOB: Aug. 5, 1966; DOD: Aug. 5, 2014

Married Carla May Wilkes: July 11, 2009

Cause of death: Car accident, head-on collision with drunk driver

Former Stepfather: Stephen Michael Morton

DOB: Feb. 13, 1971

Married Carla May Wilkes: Dec. 31, 2005

Divorced: June 1, 2006

 **Sexual Orientation:** heterosexual

 **Sexual Health:** no history of STD; no history of pregnancy;

IUD implanted June, 2014

 **Relationship Status:** Single, never married

Currently not in a relationship

 **Relationship History:** Jose Rodrigues, dated from Sept. 2013 to April 2014

Paul Clayton, dated from March 2012 to Aug. 2012

Brandon Keith, dated from Dec. 2010 to April 2011

 **Physical Description:** See attached photo.

 **Hair:** brown **Eyes:** blue

 **Height:** 5'7" **Weight:** 128 lbs.

 **Dress size:** 4 **Bra size:** 32C

 **Shoe size:** 6M **Measurements:** 32-25-37

 **Political Affiliations:** None found

 **Religious Affiliations:** None found

I stared again at her photo, trying not to notice the gigantic glasses that hid her gorgeous blue eyes. I imagined her hair down. Finally, I closed the image, realizing that I had her image imprinted more clearly in my memory, and the photo was doing nothing for me. I read through the file for the third time, feeling more impressed with my Anastasia each time I read it. She was wealthier than I had thought, and I smiled at the realization that for the first time, I could be certain that a woman didn't want me for my money. She didn't even know who I was when she had opened herself up to me, and now that she did know who I was, her reasons for choosing me would have nothing to do with the amount of money in my bank accounts, because hers were almost as impressive. I had been in business twice as long as she had, so her wealth had grown at about the same rate mine had. If she kept this up, she could surpass me in five years time. Impressive. I still didn't see her as a threat. I knew there was room for both of our companies not only in Seattle but in the Global Market.

I smiled again as I looked at her address. Little Ms. Steele was my neighbor. Escala was actually made up of four towers, and each tower had 31 floors, all luxury condominiums. I lived in the first tower in Penthouse A, my staff lived in the second tower in Penthouse B, which I also owned, and Anastasia apparently lived in the fourth tower in Penthouse D. For a moment, I wondered why our paths had never crossed. On second thought, our paths never crossed because we were both too busy building our companies and had no desire to socialize with our neighbors. I was sure Ana was like me in that regard.

Another thing I learned from Anastasia's background check was that she was a genius. Her test scores were some of the highest I had ever seen. She beat me there. I'd never cared enough about standardized testing to study. I only did what I was made to do, and then I said to hell with it all. Not Ana. She had clearly taken education seriously. She'd started at Stanford at the same time that I'd started at Harvard, but she had completed a double major there while I dropped out and started my business. My God, she was impressive. She not only was the most beautiful woman I'd ever known, but now I saw that she was also the most intelligent. And knowing that made me want her even more.

It had been around 2 a.m. when I got home, and then I spent a couple of hours reading and re-reading Anastasia's background check. I knew that trying to sleep at this point would be useless, so I decided to read through my contract that I had with my last submissive, Susannah, which had ended about six months ago. I already knew I would need to make some major changes to Ana's contract, and I wanted to get a head start on it. I read through it, making a few changes and additions. I felt I needed to state clearly that she was only to submit to me when wearing my collar, and I would only ever collar her in the privacy of my playroom or at a play party that we each agreed to attend together. Somehow, I would have to make it clear to Anastasia that I didn't expect her as the CEO of Ismintis to submit to me as the CEO of GEH. We would have separate work and private identities. Sooner or later, our work would bring us together, and I wanted her to feel comfortable with me when that time came.

After making the obvious changes that I knew the contract needed, including the ones about looking in my eyes during orgasms, calling me Master, and avoiding eye rolling, I still felt the contract was missing something. It was basically the same contract that I had used with all fifteen of my former submissives. Some parts of it were nonnegotiable, like not touching me and not sleeping with me. Others felt unnecessary, like the health issues. I didn't know Ana well yet, but I was certain that she took care of her health. I'd have to ask her about it, and if it seemed unnecessary, we could leave it out of the contract. The sun rose while I was pondering what was still missing from the contract, and I knew I needed to get ready for work... and for my meeting with John Flynn, my therapist. I left my office and went into my bedroom, glancing only briefly at the bed that I hadn't slept in. I had never allowed any of my submissives in my bedroom, so no one had ever slept in that bed except me, and I had never slept well in it. Never did a night pass that I was not disturbed by nightmares. It had become such a normal part of my life that I no longer questioned it. I typically didn't sleep more than four or five hours on a good night. It wasn't uncommon to have a sleepless night like last night, although the reason for the lack of sleep was much more welcome this time.

Flynn seemed intrigued by my account of meeting Ana at the munch.

"Tell me again, Christian... what's a munch?" he asked.

"It's an informational social gathering for people who are new to BDSM," I answered as if I were a fucking wikipedia page.

Flynn studied me with interest. "So... why were you there? You're far from new to BDSM."

"It was at the Mile High Club. I think you know that I close the restaurant to the general public once a week for private functions. I allow a BDSM group to host a munch there every so often. It's difficult for them to find a descent place to meet because of the social stigma that the general public has of BDSM. I attend two or three times a year, particularly when they do these masked events. Taylor handles security. It's safe. People who attend are so well screened, and they're on camera attending the event, so it's in their best interest to keep quiet about it. I like to attend because there aren't usually many Doms, other than newbies. I like being able to talk with like-minded people about the lifestyle, and to teach new people about it, to get rid of some of the misconceptions. But it's just talking. There are rules; one is that you aren't allowed to touch. It's a non-threatening environment."

"And so, that's how you met Ana? Is she a sub?" Flynn asked.

I smiled and nodded. "She's a sub. But she's new to it. She's never subbed until last night."

Flynn looked surprised. "You mean she actually subbed for you last night? You had sex with her? At the Mile High Club?"

"No, no, not yet," I answered with smile and a shrug of my shoulders. "But I took her into a private dining room, talked with her for a couple of hours, and then restrained her hands and feet and got her off with my fingers. She loved it, John. I mean, really loved it."

"You talked with her for a couple of hours first?" he confirmed. "Do you usually talk with your subs before signing a contract with them?"

"Never," I answered. "Not before, and not after either. We fuck. We don't talk. I've never wanted to get to know a woman before."

"But you wanted to get to know her. Why? What was different about this one?"

I thought about it for a second. "I don't know, John, but I wanted to talk with her, not just to fuck her. I _liked_ talking with her. There's just... something about her."

"What did you talk about?" John asked.

"Everything, John. Prince albums, favorite foods... I asked her some really personal sexual questions, and she answered them all. She asked me similar questions. John, I told her things I've never told anyone but you."

"You told her about Elena?" he asked.

"Yes. Not by name, but I told her how she... seduced me and fucked me. I told her about my introduction into BDSM."

"How did she respond?" he probed.

"Funny thing is... just before that, I had commented to her that BDSM isn't a place for innocent virgins. But then she said that's exactly what I was."

"Do you agree with her?" he asked.

"Well... yes. Technically, I was a fifteen year old virgin. I wanted it though."

"Do you think Elena took advantage of you?" he asked.

"No. For the millionth time, no. Elena may be a manipulative bitch, as we found out two years ago, but she didn't force me to do anything. I wanted it. She didn't do anything to me that I didn't give her permission to do. I signed a contract with her and everything."

"OK, Christian, tell me more about Ana. Is she your new submissive?" he asked.

"Umm... no, not yet," I answered.

"But you expect she will be?" he probed.

"Yes," I answered confidently. "I want her, so I'll get her. But it's going to take more work than usual."

"Why's that?" he asked.

"We were playing a sort of game last night. We didn't know each other's identities. At the end of the evening, I told her who I was, and she went ape shit crazy. I mean, she ran to the toilet and puked. I made her puke, John, just because she found out who I am. I mean, all she could say was 'Oh my God, Christian Grey!' and then she was gone, puking in the ladies room. I almost followed her in there, but... she was too freaked out by me. She came out, told me to stay away from her, and ran out of there as fast as she could. Left me holding her shoes, literally."

"Any idea what caused her... severe reaction?" Flynn asked. "I mean other than the fact that you had just tied her up and finger fucked her, and then she found out that you're the famous Christian Grey?"

"Yeah," I answered. "She was Anastasia Steele. Do you know who that is?"

"Ismintis International? That Anastasia Steele?"

"There's only one, and that's her." I replied. "She's one of a kind, John. Not only stunningly beautiful, but incredibly smart too. Genius. Incredible."

"And your business rival," John added.

"Yes, I'm sure she sees it that way," I agreed.

"And you don't?" he asked.

"No," I replied. I have no interest in competing with her in business. I have an interest in fucking her."

"But Christian, what happens after you fuck her?"

"What do you mean, John? Hopefully, I'll fuck her again. And again."

"I mean with your business. What happens when GEH and Ismintis have a common interest? Will you let her have the business interest in hopes that she'll give you what you want sexually? Or will you dominate her so she feels like she has to let you have your way in business, as you do sexually?"

"No, John, I don't want to dominate her in business. Only in our sex lives. And she wants it too. She's been craving the kind of kink I gave her last night, and she craves more. She wants it just as much as I do."

"Are you sure about that, Christian?" John asked.

"Yes, I'm sure she craves kink. Absolutely certain. I'm not sure she wants it with me, now that she knows who I am. But I'm going to convince her. I have to. I've got to have her, John."

"Why, Christian?" John asked. "You can find another sub who isn't as... complicated as this one. Why do you have to have this one?"

"Because she's... perfect. I feel... drawn to her. I felt this connection with her from the moment we met. I know she felt it too."

"Christian, do you think you could be falling in love with her?" Flynn suggested.

"What?" I asked. "Of course, not, John. Why would you ask just a stupid question? I don't do love. You know that already."

"So what will you do if she falls in love with you, like other subs have in the past?" Flynn pressed. "Are you prepared to break off your contract with her if that happens?"

"That's not going to happen," I answered confidently. "She is not interested in the hearts and flowers shit any more than I am. We want the same thing, John. I'm certain of it."

"OK, Christian," he answered in his tone that I had come to recognize when he didn't believe me. "So what are you going to do now, to win Ana over?"

"First step, find out why she had such a violent reaction. I need to reassure her that I won't harm her reputation... I think that's what she's worried most about. But I'm going to pursue her. With everything that is in me, I'm going to pursue Anastasia Steele, and she won't know what hit her. I'm going to have her, John. She will be mine."


	5. Chapter 5: First Contact (CPOV)

**Chapter 5: Christan, after the Munch, Part 2** _(Christian's POV)_

I left Flynn's office feeling more certain than ever, and I had begun to form a game plan. Step one: Reassure Ana that I mean her no harm. I could do that by returning her shoes. I'd send a personal note with them. Step two: Convince her to attend the play party tonight. If I could get her to spend more time with me, I would be able to convince her of everything else. Step three: Give her pleasure. Make her see how good it could be with me. Leave her craving more. That would win her over.

My first item on my agenda when I got to the office was to speak with Ros. "Give me everything you have on Ismintis International."

Ros stared at me, momentarily dumbfounded. "You're thinking about a merger with Ismintis International?"

"No," I answered, stone-faced. "I'm interested in a different kind of merger."

She studied me for a few more seconds before she burst out laughing. "Well, holy hell, Grey, its about fucking time you set your sights on someone. Anastasia Steele? Is she the one?"

I glared at Ros without responding, but it didn't phase her. She was one of very few people who I couldn't intimidate.

"Well, hot damn!" Ros sat down and crossed her legs. "I should warn you though, Christian, I hear she's more my type than yours."

I laughed at that and shook my head. "You shouldn't listen to idle rumors, Ros. I assure you, Anastasia Steele is about as gay as I am. I'm sure you've heard those rumors too."

Ros smiled. "Yeah, well, you do like to make people wonder, don't you, sport? But you and Ms. Steele could both set those rumors to rest if this... merger... works out for you."

"Ros, I don't give a fuck about rumors. My private life is just that... private. If people want to say I'm gay, I don't give a rat's ass."

Ros's smile didn't waver. "Well, then. Now that we've got that clear, what do you need me for?"

"I need you to compile a report. Top priority. I want to know about any interaction anyone at GEH has had with anyone at Ismintis. I want to know if the fucking janitors have lunch together. I want you to turn over every stone."

"What exactly am I looking for, Christian?" Ros asked.

"I want to know why she would consider me a threat," I answered.

Ros sniggered. "Seriously? Have you looked at yourself, Christian?"

"Ros, this goes beyond the usual business rival bullshit," I said. I didn't want to go into detail. I didn't want to explain to Ros that something about me had made Ana puke. She clearly didn't find _me_ disgusting, just my name, and there had to be a more tangible reason than simply business competition with GEH. If it was just about the BDSM and the fact that we were both public figures, I had just as much at stake as she did, so it didn't explain her freak-out. I had never had any direct business dealings with her, but I knew her reputation. She _never_ lost her cool. No, there was more to it, I was sure, and I was going to get to the bottom of it.

When Ros realized that she wasn't getting more from me, she stood up and said, "OK, is that all?"

"Yes, let me know as soon as you have anything. Interrupt my meeting with McIntyre Farm if you think it's relevant information."

When Ros left, Taylor walked in. He was holding a purse and a women's jacket.

"Trying to make a fashion statement?" I asked him. "They don't really match your shoes."

He almost smirked at me, but I could have missed it if I hadn't been watching his face. "Ms. Steele left these at the Mile High Club last night. Do you want to have them delivered to her?"

Perfect. Now I had something besides her shoes to send her with a personal note. I wasn't ready to give back those sexy shoes. A plan was formulating in my mind for them. "Leave them, Taylor. I'll take care of them."

"Sir," he responded, and then he left without another word.

I had an hour before my first meeting of the day, and I used the time to compose a letter to Anastasia. It needed to be handwritten so she would know I wrote it myself. It took me several do-overs before I was finally satisfied with what I'd written:

 _Dear Anastasia,_

 _First, I want to thank you for talking with me last night. I have never enjoyed a conversation as much as I enjoyed our time together. I meant everything that I said to you, and I don't regret any of it._

 _I don't know what caused your reaction when you learned my identity, but I would like to set your mind at ease. I respect you and will not harm you, Ana. Your secrets are safe with me, just as surely as I know mine are safe with you. I trust you, and you can trust me now just as you did last night. Learning our identities doesn't change anything. I'm the same man with whom you spent over three hours in an intimate and utterly delightful conversation. I'm sure that you'll experience even more pleasure the next time we talk. I promise._

 _With that said, I'd like to remind you of our appointment this evening. I will be in touch with instructions. Remember, Ana, you promised, and you have a reputation of always honoring your word. I look forward to it._

 _Very truly yours,_

 _Christian_

Once I was satisfied with my letter, I re-wrote it neatly on GEH stationary and sealed it in an envelope. I printed ANASTASIA STEELE and CONFIDENTIAL on the outside. Then I called in Andrea, my personal assistant.

"Andrea, I want you to take this purse and jacket and deliver them personally to Anastasia Steele at Ismintis International. I want you to hand deliver them yourself." A sudden thought occurred to me, and I decided to go for it. I continued my instructions to Andrea, "On your way, stop by a florist and pick up a bouquet of daisies. Deliver it with this letter to Ms. Steele. Be sure to give it directly to her yourself, not to her assistant or anyone else at Ismintis. I want to be sure that it gets to her immediately, but if you have to wait for her to finish a meeting to give it to her personally, then do so."

Andrea stared at me with wide eyes. "Daisies, sir...? Umm... do you want regular daisies or Gerber daisies? And do you have a... color preference?"

I stared back at her. There's more than one kind of fucking daisy? "Hell if I know. Just pick out something that you think is... suitable."

Andrea continued to stare at me as if I had grown an extra head. "Right away, Mr. Grey. Can I get you anything else?" she asked.

"No, Andrea. Do it now, and report back to me when you return. I want to know... Perhaps Ms. Steele will have a return message for me. Let me know."

I still had a few minutes before my meeting, so I went online to shop for a few things I knew I would need for Anastasia. She would be mine. I was certain of it, and I would be prepared when she agreed to it. I ordered what I needed and arranged for them to be delivered the same day.

The business I had with McIntire Farm took a little over an hour. I had several projects going on with them, but the one we needed to discuss pertained to a charity I was setting up to provide fresh produce to low income families. I had not yet chosen a director for the charity, so I needed to make some initial decisions myself, before that person took over the leadership.

As soon as my meeting convened, Andrea came into my office. "Did you do as I asked?" I asked her.

"Yes, sir," Andrea answered. "I picked up a dozen yellow Gerber daisies and hand delivered them with the envelope, her purse, and her jacket." She looked uncomfortable.

"And... how did she react? Did she read the letter? Did she... say anything?"

Andrea paused before answering, and she looked even more distressed. "Mr. Grey, I'm not sure I should repeat what she said. At first, when she saw the flowers, she looked happy, but when she saw that I had her belongings, and she realized who I was... She thanked me for delivering her things to her. She ignored the flowers, sir. I left them on her desk."

"Did she read my letter?" I asked.

"Yes, sir," Andrea replied. "I, umm, asked her to. I told her that you requested a reply."

"So you actually saw her read it?" I confirmed.

"Yes, sir. And I watched her... respond to it." Andrea held an envelope in her hand, but she was hesitant to give it to me. I could see the Ismintis International logo on the envelope, so I knew it came from Anastasia.

"Give me the envelope, Andrea," I ordered. She did, and I ripped it open. The pages of my letter were ripped to shreds, and they fell out of the envelope onto my desk. I unfolded the sheet of Ismintis International stationary and read the three words that Anastasia had written there.

 _GO TO HELL._

My face showed no reaction when I looked back up at Andrea. "What did she say?" I asked.

Andrea hesitated again. "Mr. Grey, it was mostly just profanity. Nothing of real substance. I think... Sir, I think that you've gotten her message. I... I'm sorry, sir."

I picked up all the papers and put them in the recycling bin. "Andrea, you have nothing to apologize for. You did exactly as I requested. If Ms. Steele should call, you are to put her through to me no matter what I happen to be doing, and no matter how angry she seems. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir," she replied, and I dismissed her. As she left my office, Ros entered. She looked bilious as she plopped down across from me, and she didn't make eye contact, which was completely out of character.

"This is fucking serious, Christian." Ros muttered, with no other prelude.

"Are you OK, Ros?" I asked. "You're looking like you ate something rotten."

"I feel like it too," she replied. "And you will too when you hear what I have to tell you. This is bad, Christian. Seriously, it's fucking disastrous."

She had only one task this morning, which was to find out about Ismintis. I knew whatever she was about to tell me was going to be about Anastasia, and I suddenly felt a knot in my stomach. "What is it, Ros?"

Finally, she looked me in the eyes. "I screwed up, Christian. I mean, I know we decided to back off after those employee surveys six months ago... stop making our staff feel like we're constantly micromanaging. But in this case, I should have micromanaged. I should have been more involved in the process when we closed with McPherson Communications, Sunset Media, and SIP. I trusted Henry. He negotiated the terms in all three, and I didn't require a detailed enough report. I just fired his ass, by the way, after learning... Good God, Christian, this is bad. This could be really, fucking bad."

"What did Henry do, Ros?" I asked, remaining calm although I could feel the storm on the horizon.

"When I did the initial search for connections with Ismintis, I learned that they had been in negotiations with all three companies, McPherson Communications, Sunset Media, and Seattle Independent Publishers before we were. There may have been others too... I'm still searching. Anyway, I saw that Henry was in charge of closing all three of those, so I looked at his email correspondence. I was shocked... beyond shocked... at what I found. Someone from Ismintis has been sending him audio recordings. Christian, it looks like we're spying on Anastasia Steele. I'm talking serious shit here. It looks like we planted a mole in Ismintis. They wired her office, and they've been sending the audio recordings to Henry. Probably dozens of them. I'm still searching, but I've confirmed at least twenty emailed attachments of sound files with confidential information. Some of them are phone conversations where you hear only Ms. Steele's voice. Others are of business meetings that were held in her office. They are private conversations revealing information that Henry then used to our advantage to get the upper hand, make a better deal, and get the companies that Ismintis had been about to close with."

"Holy shit, Ros!" I was silent for a moment as I processed the information. "If Anastasia presses charges, this could ruin us. And if I were in her shoes, I sure as hell would press charges. Even if we delete all emails on our end, there still will be the trail from her end."

"Our only saving grace is that she doesn't know about it yet," Ros responded. "We can get Barney on it right away. He can hack their system and get rid of all the files, and all the evidence that it ever happened."

I ignored her suggestion for the moment. "Did you have a heart-to-heart with Henry before you fired him? Did you find out how he... came upon this information?"

"He swears that he didn't initiate it and that he has no idea who it originated from. And I believe him because the emails come from various senders, all bogus, all from within Ismintis. They could easily trace them back to the computer or computers they originated from. Barney might be able to do that remotely..."

"No," I responded, cutting her off. "We won't hack into their system. We haven't broken any laws... it only appears that we have. We won't start now. We're going to deal with this in an ethical manner, Ros. Above board, all the way."

"How, Christian?" she asked.

"By making Ms. Steele aware of it," I answered. "I'm going to talk with her right away."

"Christian, that could backfire," Ros said. "You said it yourself... if it were you, you'd press charges. So would I."

"If the situation were reversed, and if I believed her when she claimed she didn't know about it, I wouldn't press charges. I'd use her to flush out the mole."

Ros considered my words. "Are you sure you'll be able to convince her that we didn't know about it until today? And stop her from taking any legal action against us?"

"Yes," I responded. "I'm confident that I'll be able to persuade her." I was quiet for a moment, formulating an action plan. "OK, Ros, continue the search. Email me everything you have. I want all those audio files right away, and any new ones you find."

"OK, Christian. And... I'm really sorry about this. If I had..."

I cut her off. "Ros, did you know about it before today?" I asked.

She adamantly replied, "No, Christian, of course not, but I should have. It should have never gotten this far. And it won't happen again."

"You're right. It won't. From now on, require detailed reports from your staff on all their correspondence. Make sure they leave nothing out. Send me a weekly executive summary. That's all, Ros," I dismissed her.

I checked the time. 11:20. I needed to meet with Anastasia right away, and even though I preferred to have her come to GEH, I knew she would be more receptive if I met her in a public place that was neutral to both of us. I sure as hell wasn't going to go to Ismintis, where anything I said to her would be recorded. I opened up Anastasia's background check, found her private cell number, and created a contact for her in my phone. Then I texted her.

 **Christian:** _We need to talk right away. Meet me for lunch at noon at the Zig Zag Cafe._

 **Anastasia:** _Who is this? Are you sure you have the right number?_

 **Christian:** _Oh yes, I assure you, Ms. Steele, I have the right number. I hope you found that everything in your purse was undisturbed. Meet me for lunch. I need to talk to you in person._

 **Anastasia:** _Mr. Grey. Of course. Was my letter to you not clear enough? Leave me alone. I have nothing to say to you._

 **Christian:** _I have something I say to you. You want to hear it, trust me._

 **Anastasia:** _No, I don't want to hear it, and I don't trust you. Go to hell, Mr. Grey._

I had hoped that texting would be enough because I didn't want to give her mole any inkling that we were on to them, but clearly I was going to need to call her and take care not to let her give us away. I wasn't even sure she'd take my call, but I tried anyway.

"What? Is the written word not clear enough for you?" she spouted venomously into the phone as soon as she answered. "Do you need to hear it too? Let me spell it out for you. GO TO HELL!"

I ignored her anger and responded calmly before she had a chance to end the call, "Wait. Give me ten seconds. That's all. Ten fucking seconds."

She began to count down, "Ten... nine... eight..."

I spoke quickly and succinctly. "You have a mole. Do not repeat anything I'm telling you out loud. They can hear you but not me, unless I'm on fucking speaker phone, and in that case we're screwed. Or if your phone is bugged too, but I don't think it is. I have proof, and I will give it to you right away. I didn't know about any of this until today, but now I understand why you reacted to me the way you did, and I don't blame you, but I promise I'm not going to put you out of business, I am going to correct all the wrongs GEH has done against you, and I'm going to help you catch this bastard because he implicates me too, and that really pisses me off. If you believe me, and I hope you do because I swear to you that I'm telling you the truth, don't speak. Hang up your phone and then text me that you'll meet me for lunch, as requested."

For several seconds, she didn't speak, and I waited for her to either end the call or say something. Finally I asked, "Ana, are you still there?"

After another moment of silence, she said, "Umm, yes... Yes, OK." Then she ended the call. A moment later, I received her text.

 **Anastasia:** _You better not be fucking with me._

 **Christian:** _I assure you, Ana, when I fuck with you, you will know it and like it. But no, this is serious. I would never joke about something like this._

 **Anastasia:** _Are you certain about the intel you've received._

 **Christian:** _Affirmative. I will share evidence with you over lunch._

 **Anastasia:** _Shit. I need to get my office swept._

 **Christian:** _Negative. Not if you want to catch the bastard. Just wait until after we talk._

 **Anastasia:** _If this is some kind of game you're playing or if you double cross me, I'll end you, Mr. Grey. Don't think I can't do it._

 **Christian:** _Put your whip away, Madam Anastasia. I don't doubt that you can do any fucking thing that you set your mind to. This is not a game, and I will never double cross you. I promise. Now get your sexy ass to the Zig Zag Cafe in half an hour._

 **Anastasia:** _OK, fine._

I smiled at her response. I was taking a risk flirting with her via text, but she didn't show any offense. She didn't hate me. She had just misunderstood me.


	6. Chapter 6: The Lunch Date (CPOV)

**Chapter 6: The Lunch Date** _(Christian's POV)_

At ten past twelve, I was sitting at a table at the Zig Zag Cafe wondering if Ana was going to show up. I had already ordered sandwiches for both of us. I glanced at my phone again to see if she had texted again. A moment later, she sat down across from me, looking calm, collected, and beautiful.

"I apologize for being late. I got held up as I was leaving the office. God, I suspect everyone there now, and it feels like shit. How do I know I can trust you? Shit! I'm not even sure what to call you. Mr. Grey? Christian? I'm sure as hell not going to call you M-"

"Shh..." I cut her off by putting my hand over her mouth, and I calmly said, "Easy now. Never call me that in public."

"How about I never call you that, ever, period," she snapped. To anyone who happened to look at her, she looked completely composed, but I could see that under her calm demeanor, she was rattled. And she was still very angry. For some reason, it turned me on.

"We're getting off on the wrong foot here," I said. "Call me Christian. I'll call you Anastasia. We won't play any games right now. We won't drink any tequila or wine. It's the middle of the weekday, and we're in a public place. Let's have a conversation, Anastasia. I will be just as forthcoming with you as I was last night. Even more so, if that's possible. You can trust me, and I'll prove it to you."

She took a deep breath and looked me in the eye. I could almost see the anger diffusing from her eyes. "OK, Christian. For some reason, I do trust you. I've trusted you since the moment I met you last night. And I trusted your reputation before that, until you started... or someone at GEH started... interfering with my business interactions. Do you know how much I wanted SIP? God, that pissed me off! Why the hell would you want a publishing house anyway? There's no money in it... that wasn't my motivation. I had a great deal, and it was all but signed. And now, you're telling me that you didn't know about it? How can that be possible?"

I studied her face for a moment before I responded, "Sometimes something can be right in front of your face and you don't recognize it. Then I reached over, took her glasses off her face, and looked through them.

"What the hell are you doing?" she snapped.

I answered, "Always calm and collected Anastasia Steele. What I'm doing is looking through your glasses to find out how poor your eyesight is."

She snatched her glasses back from me and put them back on. "There's nothing wrong with my eyesight, Christian. I have 20/20 vision."

"Yes, I can see that," I responded. "What I can't figure out... well, there are two things, actually. One, why do you wear those hideous things since you clearly don't need them? And two, how the hell did you not recognize me last night with your perfect eyesight?"

She swallowed and looked embarrassed. "One, I wear them to maintain an image. I need men like you to take me seriously, not see me for just my ass and tits. And two, I have no fucking idea. I've followed you for years, read every article that's ever been written about you, followed every piece of advice you've ever given, followed your business model to a T. And I didn't know... I don't know, Christian. I've asked myself that question a dozen times since last night, and I have no answer."

"Hey, don't sweat it, Ana," I said. "If it makes you feel any better, I didn't know you either. And I follow you too. I'd be an idiot not to. But even after you left, I had to get Taylor, my CPO, to tell me who you were. He was in charge of security last night, so he had everyone's personal details."

"Well, you have a better excuse than I do. I barely recognized myself last night. You, on the other hand, looked just as... just like you always do."

Her blush was adorable, and I couldn't resist. "Just as what, Ana? What were you going to say?"

She didn't answer immediately, but she looked me in the eye when she did. "I didn't know, you know. I'd seen your picture all over, but... maybe it's because it was usually head shots. You have a very attractive face, so I really should have known you. I know that face well. But... I got distracted. I didn't know..."

She was killing me, so I pushed her, "What, Ana? You didn't know what?"

She looked frustrated as she answered, "God, Christian. How hot you are, OK? I didn't know how hot you are. There, are you happy?"

Was I happy? Could I possibly have been happier? Doubtful. "Extremely. And for the record, I think you're hot too. Like, really fucking hot."

Ana rolled her eyes. "OK, then," she said.

"Ana, did you just roll your eyes?" I asked her.

Her eyes grew large, and her face blushed deeply. She leaned toward me and whispered, "Christian, you can't do that. I'm not fucking going there. Don't even suggest punishments to me right now. We are so not having that conversation. And I will roll my fucking eyes whenever I damn well please. If that offends you, get over it, because I'm not your fucking sub. I'm offended by whatever is going on at GEH that is getting into my business. Can we focus on that?"

God, she was hot. I'd never found eye rolling attractive until then. I was itching to punish her, but longing so much more just to fuck her. But for the moment, I needed to diffuse her. "Hey, you're right. Let's not have that conversation right now. It's just... I'm attracted to you, Ana, so it's a challenge not to think about... things we don't want to think about at the moment. But I'm great at challenges. So let's focus on business for now. I can do that."

"Good," she responded. "I get it. Really, I do. I just... I wish we had met under different circumstances. Until three months ago, I had so much respect for you, but then I went from admiring you to hating you. You really have some explaining to do, Christian. But the man I met last night wouldn't do what I think... what I thought... I don't know... that you'd done. So what is your explanation, and how the hell do you know... or what makes you so sure... that I have a mole?"

"We'll get there," I replied. "How much sleep did you get last night?"

She looked like I had thrown her for a loop. Good. That's just how I wanted it. "Why do you ask?" she responded. "How much sleep did you get?"

"None at all," I answered. "But I'm used to not sleeping much. You, on the other hand... I doubt you usually have those dark circles under your eyes. How much sleep do you usually get?"

Anastasia sighed. "Why do I think I'm not going to get anywhere in this conversation unless I answer your questions?" Then she actually smiled at me. Holy shit, she was beautiful. Ugly glasses, pinned up hair, and all, she was stunningly beautiful. "OK, Christian," she said. "Normally, I sleep about six hours, and never more than seven. Last night, I didn't sleep at all. Your turn."

"My turn," I repeated, smiling back at her. "Last night I didn't sleep at all. The night before that, I slept maybe three hours. I rarely sleep more than four. Five if I'm very lucky. Three and a half is about average. What have you eaten since last night?"

"What?" she asked. She looked confused.

I continued to smile at her. "I watched you eat about a third of the platter of appetizers that we ordered last night, but then you promptly threw it up as soon as you found out who I was. What have you eaten since then?"

She looked confused and a little annoyed. "Why are you asking these questions? I don't know. Umm... I haven't had much of an appetite. I ate a few bites of yogurt, but I couldn't finish it. I brought a banana to work with me, but it's still on my desk."

"Mmm hmm, just as I thought," I said.

"And what about you, Christian. What have you eaten today?" she asked.

"About half an omelet," I answered. "I too had problems finishing my breakfast. That's not normal for me either. Do you usually have yogurt for breakfast?"

She studied my face for a moment before answering. "Yes, either that or oatmeal. I usually get up around 5 or 5:30, use the bathroom, brush my teeth, and then work out for about an hour and a half. I have my own gym, but sometimes if weather permits, I go for a run with Luke. Usually though, I run on my treadmill or elliptical machine. I lift weights too. Nothing too heavy, just enough to keep me toned. Between lifting, I do planks, jumping jacks, that kind of thing. It increases my heart rate, so then the weights are more effective. After about an hour, I spend another half hour doing yoga. Then I take a shower and get dressed for work. That usually takes me about 45 minutes. Before I leave for work, I eat some yogurt and granola with some berries or a banana, or I may have a bowl of cold cereal or oatmeal. I like to eat oatmeal when it's raining. With brown sugar and raisons. On the weekends, I might eat a bigger breakfast. I love pancakes and bacon, but I can't eat like that everyday. I love eggs too, and sometimes I have them with toast during the week. So then, after I've had breakfast, my CPO drives me to work. That's usually around 7:30, but never later than 8:00. We usually drive my Tesla, like we did today, but occasionally I roll out the Rolls Royce. I'm thinking about getting a sports car, but I haven't decided what kind yet, and I'd probably never let Luke drive it. I'm leaning towards a Mazarati, but I'm not sure. I need to do some more research. Hmm... What else would you like to know? Hmm... I drink a lot of water throughout the day, or if the weather is cold and rainy as it often is, I drink hot tea. I prefer Twinings English Breakfast Tea, and I have an electric kettle in my office just for that purpose. When the weather is nice, I sometimes go for walks in the park near my building during lunch breaks. Seriously, Christian, what else?"

"You think my questions are too invasive?" I asked.

"Well, you haven't asked me when I start my period yet, but I'm expecting it any time," she responded.

"Well, that is useful information to have for later," I responded.

"Next week. Probably Wednesday. I prefer Tampex Pearl tampons, and I also wear Always pads on really heavy days, just to be safe. But only the kind with wings."

"Wings?" I asked. I was thoroughly amused by her candidness, but I also was a little confused. She was talking about menstrual pads with wings. What the hell?

She smirked at me before she continued, ignoring my confusion, "You should know after last night that no question is too invasive. Even without tequila. I just can't believe... I still haven't gotten over the shock... You're Christian Grey."

"Mmm hmm. I'm Christian Grey. Not your enemy. Not going to harm you. Not now, not ever. Well, unless making your ass red counts as harming you... But really, it shouldn't, because I'd never really harm you, Anastasia."

"Christian, we can't go there," she said. Her blush was deeper, and she was looking down at her hands.

At just that moment, the server came with the sandwiches that I had ordered and set them in front of us. Once he had walked away, I reached over and took Ana's hand.

"Ana, we will talk about it. You promised me you'd go with me tonight, no matter what. But we don't have to go there yet. First, we should eat. Then we should talk about our business problem. Then we'll get around to discussing tonight." I paused to check her reaction, but other than her adorable blush, she didn't react. I let go of her hand and asked, "So, turkey on honey oat with bacon and avocado or roast beef and cheddar on sourdough?"

She didn't respond at first, and I knew that she was trying to compose herself. Finally, she cleared her throat and said, "Turkey. Thanks, Christian!" She picked up half of the sandwich and took a bite. I watched her eat while I took a bite of the roast beef sandwich.

We ate in silence for a couple of minutes. Then I said, "You know, Ana... about those glasses..."

"You really hate my glasses, don't you," she remarked.

"I just don't understand," I admitted. "I know a lot of women who wear glasses, including my mom. But she wears attractive glasses that were obviously made for women. They don't detract from her beauty in any way. Glasses usually don't make a big difference in a person's appearance. But you chose these large ass hideous things that were obviously made for men. I mean, I get why you started out wearing them, because you wanted to look like a dyke. So assholes like me wouldn't grab your ass or expect you to give me favors in exchange for business deals. Not that I've ever... but anyway, what I don't get is why you feel like you still need them. You've made it, Ana. You're a billionaire. You're me four years ago, and you have the fucking MBA and genius status to go along with it."

"You think I have a genius status?" she asked in shock. "Christian, you're the genius. Everything I've done... all of my success... it's because I followed your example."

"I'm not a genius, Ana. I'm just good at reading people. You, on the other hand, have a near perfect SAT score. You finished a double major at Stanford in four years, and you kept a four-point GPA in your MBA."

"Wow, that was fast," she quipped, not the least bit offended at how I had clearly invaded her privacy. "I'm not even going to ask how you found out all of that... or what else you've found out about me."

"See, that's more proof of how smart you are. And you've led Ismintis International to become one of the fastest growing companies in the world. You do realize, don't you, that if our companies keep growing at their current rate, you're going to catch up with me in five years?"

Her eyes were wide. "I realized that we were growing as rapidly as GEH did in the first three years, but I didn't realize we might surpass you after five years."

"So... back to my original question... why do you need those fucking glasses? You don't need to hide behind them any more. I'm not going to pinch your ass or your tits. At least not in public. I make no promises when I get you alone. But Ana, you've got to know... sure, I want you... I haven't kept that a secret. I'm pretty damned determined to have you. But that doesn't mean I don't respect you as one of the most successful and intelligent business leaders in the country. And you don't need those goddamn glasses to have my respect."

She continued to eat without responding to me, but I could see that she was pondering my words. I watched her as she finished her sandwich and ate a few chips. At last, she looked up at me and spoke. "I'll think about it, Christian."

"About what, Ana?" I asked.

She laughed. "See, I know you now. I knew you were going to ask me that, not because you don't know what I'm talking about but because you want to hear me say it. OK. I'll think about leaving my glasses off of my business attire. It's just... it's been a part of my look for the past four... almost five years. You're right, I hide behind them. They make me feel... secure."

"It's a facade," I insisted. "And you don't need it. You're amazing without it. And besides that, you've never really been secure, so that was a false sense of security. You got where you are by hard work and sheer determination. I know because you're so much like me in that regard."

"Anyway... can we talk about that false sense of security... and the fact that I have some asshole working for me who is selling you secrets?"

"Not selling," I corrected. "Giving away, for free. Sending anonymous email messages with attachments of audio files of you having confidential conversations. My former employee received these emails, didn't inform Ros or myself, and acted on them by using the information to one-up you."

"Shit!" she exclaimed. "It still really pisses me off," she said. "And you knew nothing about it until today?"

"Correct," I answered. "After you... reacted so badly last night, I knew there must be more than just my pretty face... or my famous name, more accurately... that freaked you out. So I asked Ros to look into it. She was mortified to find out that a guy who she had considered her poster child was responsible. We're all at fault though. Ros and I decided about six months ago to take a step back and show more trust towards the people working directly under us. This was after employee surveys showed complaints about our micromanaging. After today, that's changed. We're back to micromanaging. I can't see any other way. I know how this looks. The first thing I said to Ros when she told me was that if I were in your shoes, I'd press charges."

Anastasia made me feel very relieved when she responded, "I'm not going to press charges, Christian. No legal action. But I do want you to help me catch the fucker. But first, I want to know what you have. You mentioned audio files?"

I finished my sandwich, wiped my hands, opened my briefcase, and got out my laptop. Ana didn't speak again as she watched me open my email and find one of the messages that Ros had forwarded to me that morning. Once I had found what I was looking for, I said, "Here's how we know you have a bug in your office."

I watched her face as I played the recording, which was of her voice, in the middle of a business call. Even though we couldn't hear the other person on the call, I heard her call him Mr. Oldenburg, so I knew she was talking with Larry Oldenburg from McPherson Communications. She was revealing more information in the phone call than any competitor should ever have heard. If I had been in her shoes, there would have been hell to pay.

"McPherson," Ana said grimly. "That was the first company that GEH stole out from under me."

"I didn't know, Ana," was all I could say. I wanted to argue that we didn't steal them, but I could see why she felt that we did, and I was in no place to dispute that. Becoming defensive would not solve anything or win any points with Anastasia.

"I know, Christian. I believe you," she responded.

"Thank God," I said.

"Show me what else you have," she ordered me.

I smirked because for some reason, I found it really hot when she ordered me around. Maybe I'd be willing to do some roleplaying with her sometime, switch roles, sub for her. That could be interesting. Focus, Grey! I didn't say anything as I closed the first recording and opened a second one. It was a conversation between Anastasia and Jerry Roach from Seattle Independent Publishing. They were going over the terms of their contract.

This time, Anastasia didn't maintain her calm as well as she did with the McPherson recording. She showed visible anger. "Damn it!"

"SIP," I muttered grimly.

I have faced many hard-assed business people, and I've never met one I couldn't stand up to. I am never intimidated, never afraid. But at that moment, I felt a little afraid of Anastasia as she looked like she could spit nails and said, "Do you have any idea how hard I worked to get that deal? And he was finally there. You can hear him. He was ready to sign. Why the hell didn't I have him sign right there? Then it would have been too late for you… for GEH… to take it from me. But no, I insisted on having Legal take another look at it before signing. Shit!"

"Ana, calm down," I coaxed her. "SIP is yours. So is McPherson. So is Sunset Media. Name your price. Hell, I'll give them to you for free. You can have them."

Her anger quickly turned to shock. "You're not serious," she said. "You'd lose millions if you did that. No, Christian."

"Anastasia, do you realize what I stand to lose if you take these recordings… which I am going to forward to you as soon as we end this conversation… And I mean all of them, not just the two you've heard… And if you use them to prove that GEH planted a mole inside Ismintis and used that person to bug your office? You will have enough evidence to make a pretty strong case that GEH used information that we obtained illegally to negotiate better deals with at least three businesses that had been in the final stages of negotiating with you. Hell, I could go to prison."

She stared at me for a moment. "Christian, I already told you, I'm not going to press charges. I believed you when you said you didn't know, and that Ros didn't know, and that your guy… I forget his name… received these from somebody at Ismintis. I believe you, Christian, which means that I don't believe you broke any laws, not directly anyway. Ideally, your guy would have reported those emails to you immediately, and you would have then made me aware of them… three months ago. That would have been the most ethical thing to do. It would have ended with McPherson. So your guy's behavior was unethical. But that's water under the bridge now. I certainly don't expect you to just… give me… three multi-million dollar corporations."

"Do you still want them?" I asked her.

"You know I want SIP," she responded. "Sunset Media and McPherson… I don't know. They've both been in your hands for nearly three months. Surely, you've already started taking them apart. I'd have to look at the books again. If you're serious, I'd like to do a little research on them and then let you know if I want to buy them from you. I don't want you to give them to me. That's absurd. But I will pay a fair price for them if I decide I still want them."

"Name your price, and they're yours," I responded.

"OK, how about you sell me SIP for what Ismintis offered them in the first place. The contract had already been finalized. They were days away from signing. Let's go back and take a look. You'll still be on the losing end, because I'm sure your guy had to have offered them more than we were offering."

I couldn't hide my smirk as I asked her, "Do you always concern yourself with what your business rival is losing when you negotiate deals with them?"

She looked shocked. "Holy shit, you're right!" she responded. She took another moment before she continued, "It's like, overnight, I no longer see you as my business rival. I see you more as a… friend. My God, that's dangerous! And before you ask, no, I'm never this forthcoming in a business negotiation. I never reveal so much. I never would have admitted what I just admitted to anyone else. I… it scares me how much I trust you, Christian. I could be setting myself up for…"

"Stop it," I commanded. "How about I make you a promise, right here and now, to set your mind at ease? I'll even make a contract this afternoon, and we can both sign it tonight. Here's my promise, Anastasia. I, Christian Grey, CEO of Grey Enterprise Holdings, do solemnly swear to never make a business deal that could damage Ismintis International. So help me God. I'll get Legal to polish the language on that."

She stared at me incredulously for another moment before she began to giggle. God, I loved that sound. She reached out her hand toward mind and linked our pinky fingers together as she said, "OK, Christian. I promise you the same thing. I, Anastasia Steele, CEO of Ismintis International, do solemnly swear to never make a business deal that could damage Grey Enterprise Holdings. So help me God." She burst out giggling as she finished and released my pinky.

"Ana, as much as I love the sound of your giggles, and believe me, I have never heard anything I enjoy more, I'm perfectly serious about this contract. I mean what I say."

Her face sobered as she looked me in the eyes and replied, "I know you are, Christian, and so am I. I also believe you were serious when you offered to give me three multimillion dollar corporations for free, but you were taking a risk. You knew I'd refuse. You knew I couldn't let you do that. You would have regretted it, and it also would have gone against the promise I just made you, never to make any business deals that could damage Grey Enterprise Holdings. Sunset Media itself was worth over fifty million dollars, and McPherson was at least half that. That was three months ago, and depending on what you've done with them, it could be even more now. I think giving away that kind of money would damage you. I know you're powerful, and it wouldn't ruin you, but it's still ridiculous. So ridiculous in fact that you never really intended to do it. You knew I couldn't accept. What if I had, Christian? What would you have done if I had agreed to take all three companies for free?"

I smiled as I responded, "I guess you'll never know, will you, Anastasia."

"No, I know, Christian" she said as she smiled back at me. "You would have honored your word. You would have given me almost a hundred million dollars. You still would, even now, if I asked you to. Yes, I think you would." She leaned towards me and whispered, "There's a part of you that wants me so badly that you'd give me anything I asked for in exchange for one thing: if I simply agree to be your sub. Well, let me tell you this, Christian Grey, you can't buy me. Don't even try. If I agree to sub for you, it will be because that's what I want, not because you've manipulated me or bought me."

I met her gaze and leaned toward her so that our faces were inches apart. "Anastasia," I whispered, "you are about ten seconds away from being thrown over this table and fucked five ways from Sunday. I don't think I need to remind you that we are in a very public place, and as much as I think we both would enjoy it, I seriously doubt we would enjoy the very public arrest or the hassle that our legal teams would then have in getting us out of jail. So I suggest that we table any further discussion of our sexual relationship until we're alone together, out of the public eye."

We leaned back, away from each other at the same time, and I was delighted to see that she averted her eyes like the natural submissive that she is. Her face was crimson, and she was breathing heavily. I watched her silently as she looked up and took in our surroundings.

"Oh, shit, shit, shit!" she exclaimed a moment later. I stared at her in confusion. "How could we have been so careless?" she asked as she looked back at me in fear and frustration.

"What are you talking about?" I asked her as I looked around, trying to see what had upset her.

Maintaining her calm exposure, she leaned towards me again and whispered angrily, "Christian fucking Grey, do you ever go out in public without a paparazzi tail? I rarely do these days, and I'm sure you _never_ do. We're screwed! Totally fucked up the wall! What the hell was I thinking? What the hell were _you_ thinking? You're much better versed in these things than I am. I'm still getting used to all the media attention. You, on the other hand, have been hassled for years now. Didn't you know…?"

"Ana, there are no paps in here," I replied. "Taylor cleared the place before I came in, and he's been standing guard all this time. I'm sure your guy, Luke Sawyer, is too, right?"

"Shit!" she responded, clearly ignoring me. "Christian _fucking_ Grey! In all the years I've known you… at least known your public image, I have never seen a photograph taken of you with a woman, except maybe one or two with your sister. Well, guess what? That's about to change. I bet you a hundred bucks we make the tabloids within the hour. I'm sure we've already been tweeted. Shit, shit, shit!"

"Ana, calm down!" I said calmly. But at the same time, I looked around again and noticed a couple of people with their smart phones in their hands, looking innocent, but I realized what Anastasia had realized as soon as she spotted them. I sighed deeply as I told her, "OK, you're right. I owe you a Ben Franklin, but I'll hold off giving it to you until we no longer have an audience. Wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong impression, huh? Well, I guess it's too late for that. We should get out of here before the storm hits."

A second later, Taylor started to approach, and he didn't have to tell me that the paps had begun to arrive. "Go pull the car around," I told him as I stood up and left a tip on the table.

"Sawyer already has Ms. Steele's car waiting at the curb, sir. I'm here to escort you."

"How bad is it?" Anastasia asked him.

"About half a dozen paps who arrived all at once," he responded. "Possibly more by now."

I echoed Anastasia's words, "Shit, shit, shit!" She was right. I should have predicted and avoided this. Now, we both were about to have a media frenzy on our hands, and it was my fault.


	7. Chapter 7: Media Frenzy, Part 1 (CPOV)

**Chapter 7: The Media Frenzy, Part 1** _(Christian's POV)_

By the time we got out the door, there were a dozen cameras in our faces, not counting the bystanders holding up their iPhones. I put my hand on the small of Anastasia's back and guided her protectively through the crowd to her car, where Taylor opened the door for her. I crawled in behind her.

"Nice car," I muttered, admiring her Tesla Model X.

"Shut up, Christian," she responded. "Fuck!" she added as she looked out the tinted windows at the media frenzy as we drove away. She grabbed her phone from her purse and made a call. As she waited for the person to answer, she took a deep breath and composed herself. She sounded like the level-headed CEO that she is when she said, "Hannah, I need you to assemble my PR team. 3 p.m. My office. Thanks." She ended the call and looked at me. She sounded completely relaxed as she said, "Not much leg room back here. I usually ride in the front with Luke when we take the Tesla. I prefer to drive it, of course. Handles like a dream, and goes for weeks without needing recharging. But if I had known that Christian _fucking_ Grey was going to accompany me through a paparazzi parade, I'd have had Luke drive the Rolls Royce today. It has a much nicer back seat." To the average person, she would have seemed calm and composed. I noticed her heavy breathing though, and she also seemed to be trembling a little.

"Ana, first of all, will you PLEASE STOP CALLING ME THAT?" I raised my voice slightly to emphasize how much I hated the name that she kept repeating. Then I said, more calmly, "Just call me Christian, OK? No surname, no expletives, no promises to submit to me. Just Christian."

Anastasia glanced uncomfortably at Sawyer and Taylor in the front seat, who were both watching the traffic and doing a fantastic job of pretending to ignore us. Then she smiled at me and agreed. "OK, no more fucking Grey," she said. "Although I kind of liked it," she added under her breath.

"Well, I don't, so thank you," I responded. "Second of all, you know I never apologize, right?" When she nodded, I continued. "That's because I usually don't have a reason to. But when I'm wrong, I am man enough to admit it." I reached for my wallet, took out a $100 bill, and handed it to her. "You were right. I'm sorry about the paps. I should have known it would happen. I could have prevented it."

She accepted the money without argument and put it in her purse. "You're distracted," she replied. "It throws you off your game. Makes you do crazy things. Like offering to give a chunk of your company away."

Sawyer spoke up from the driver's seat. "Ana, where am I taking you?" he asked. "Ismintis or GEH?"

"GEH," she answered before she turned toward me and asked, "Are you sure your office is clean, Christian? We still have to finish our conversation. I have about half an hour before I need to head back to Ismintis."

"Yes, I'm certain it's clean," I responded. "And my schedule is free for the next hour." As I spoke, I sent Andrea a text directing her to clear my schedule for the rest of the afternoon. I told her to get my PR team to go ahead and draft a statement and then to be on standby until I called for them. I multitasked by telling Taylor to direct Sawyer to the service entrance to avoid the paps.

While I was typing into my phone, Anastasia's phone rang. "Kate," she answered. "Don't tell me. I already know. I'm afraid to look at the Internet right now." She listened to Kate's reply for a minute before she said, "Kate, if you'll slow down a fucking minute, I'll answer you. Yes, you're right; I did say I hated him. Yes, right again, I changed my mind. No, we haven't had sex yet, unless you count what we did last night, which I already told you about. No, he's not my Dom, not yet anyway. And no, we were not meeting at the fucking Zig Zag Café to discuss a BDSM contract. Shit!" Ana stopped speaking and glanced at the front seat again. "Hold on, Kate," she said. She paused a second and said, "You know what… I'll call you back in a minute." She ended the call with Kate and spoke to the front seat. "Luke Sawyer, you have signed an NDA. You've proven yourself to be an excellent CPO and I'd even go so far as to call you a good friend. So I'm trusting you to keep everything you hear under wraps."

"Yes, ma'am," he replied.

"Cut the crap," she snapped. "I'm still Ana. And Taylor… I don't know your full name."

"Jason Taylor, ma'am," he replied.

"Jason Taylor," she repeated. "You will not call me ma'am. You will call me Ana. And you will also keep everything that you have heard or will hear between your boss and myself confidential. You led the security at the event last night, so you already know about my interest in… shit!"

"Ana, just say it," I prompted her. "Your interest in BDSM. Our common interest in BDSM. You already said it on the phone with Kate, and they heard you, so they know. They both know how we like to fuck now. Taylor knows all about my lifestyle, and he's a master of discretion. And Sawyer had to find out sooner or later if you're going to continue to trust him to keep you safe."

Ana glared at me, but then she responded, "OK, fine. Thank you so much, Christian, for so effectively informing our security of how, as you so eloquently put it, we like to fuck. Perhaps you can help me with my press release. In fact, why don't we make a joint press release, so we can inform the whole world together about how we like to fuck?"

I stared back at her, not the least bit phased by her outburst. "Sarcasm doesn't become you, Anastasia. You're much too smart for that kind of crudeness."

"Fuck you, Christian," she responded.

"I look forward to it, Ana," I replied.

She didn't respond to me. Instead, she looked towards the front seat and asked, "Can I rely on both of you to keep your mouths shut about my personal life?"

"Absolutely, Ana" Sawyer responded. I was sure that he wanted to laugh, but he maintained a serious face and respectful tone.

At the same time, Taylor said, "Yes, ma'a… Ana!"

"Fine!" Ana responded. She unlocked her phone and called Kate back. When Kate answered, Ana said, "Hold on, Kate. I'm still with Christian. I'm going to put you on speaker phone so he can hear the bad news too. Our security are in the front seat, so they can hear you too."

"OK," Kate answered. "Hello, Mr. Grey."

"Call me Christian," I responded. "Give us the down and dirty, Kate."

"Well, you're both trending on Twitter. More accurately, 'Seattle's new power couple' is trending. The pictures are… steamy."

"What do you mean, steamy?" Anastasia asked. "It's not like we were making out in public. We didn't even kiss." She glanced at me when she said it, and I'd never wanted to kiss anyone so badly.

Kate answered, "In a few photos, you're holding hands. In one, your pinkies are linked. In another, your faces are so close it looks like you're about to kiss. And your eyes… well, how should I put this? You both have a dreamy look in your eyes. You look… Well, hell, you know I'm not one to mince words, Steele. You look horny as hell. Both of you do. You look like you're about to get it on."

"Goddamn it!" Ana said.

"You can imagine the bullshit that's already been written. You're pregnant, of course. You've merged your businesses already. There are a few photos where you look angry. That's when, according to the gossip, you were arguing about which one of you is going to lead the company now that you've combined it. And people are debating which name you're going to use, or if you're going to give it a new name."

"Shit, this is going to affect your stock," I told Ana.

"No… I'm private like you. Followed your example there too," she responded.

"Well, thank fuck for that," I said. "Neither of us has to worry about the stock market or a board of trustees questioning us."

"No, but we still have to do something about the shit storm," she said. "We still have stakeholders. We each have thousands of employees and business partners, and if we don't get on this right away, we're going to suffer for it one way or another."

"So, Ana, do you want me to publish anything about you now? You know I can do it," Kate asked.

"No, Kate. Hold off on that. I need to talk with my PR team. I'm sure Christian will get his team on it too," Ana responded, and I nodded at her.

A couple of minutes later, we pulled into the service entrance of GEH and Anastasia ended her call with Kate. We were able to avoid the paparazzi completely, and Taylor escorted us up to my office in my private elevator while Sawyer parked Ana's car.

When we got off on my floor, I introduced Anastasia to my personal assistant, whom she had already met that morning, and her assistant, who would be sitting in for her if she happened to be out. "Andrea and Olivia, this is Anastasia Steele. From now on, if she visits, she is to see me immediately. If she calls, put her through to me immediately even if I'm in a meeting. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir," they responded simultaneously.

"We are not to be disturbed for the next half hour," I told them.

Anastasia followed me into my office, and I closed and locked the door.

"Nice office," Ana commented as she looked around. "It's bigger and more intimidating than mine. But brighter too. I like the art. It's local, isn't it?"

"Mmm hmm," I responded. "Trouton."

"Raising the ordinary to the extraordinary," she said, lost in thought. She looked back at me and studied me for a moment. "I like it a lot. It seems out of character for you, though. Doesn't really fit the feel of the rest of your office." She paused and then added, "But then again… I'm still getting to know the real you. I wonder if the art doesn't actually fit you better than the office does."

For a moment I couldn't breathe. The real me. Fuck! I smiled grimly and replied, "Anastasia, nobody knows the real me, but in the few hours I've known you, you've already come closer than anyone ever has."

She continued to study me, and I felt exposed, as if she could actually see the rottenness inside me. "Why, Christian?" she asked.

"Why what, Anastasia?" I asked. "Why doesn't anybody know the real me, or why have you come closer than anyone?"

"Both," she answered, as I expected she would.

"Well, I'm a very private person, as you already know," I answered. "And you… well, you already know this too, don't you Ana? There's just something about you."

"Neither of those was a very satisfactory answer," she replied, but she swallowed and took a deep breath. She glanced at her watch before she continued. "But we don't have time to discuss it now. We still have business to finish discussing."

"We certainly do," I responded suggestively. I walked around my desk and picked up her shoes that she had worn the previous night. I had brought them with me this morning and left them on the corner of my desk. I handed them to her and said, "You will wear these shoes again tonight. I'll have your dress waiting for you at Escala when you get home this afternoon."

"Woah, slow down there, big guy!" she responded. "Don't go all Dom on me just yet. I have an empire to run too, you know, and I can't do that if I'm kneeling at your feet. So let's finish our business first, OK, Christian?"

I smirked at her. "Fine, Anastasia. Have it your way, for now." I walked towards her and sat down in the chair next to her. "Let's review where we are. I'm going to sell you SIP for the price that you offered them. We can review that contract on Monday. You are going to research Sunset Media and McPherson, and then let me know, right? Do you think a week is enough time for you to give me an answer?"

"Yes, that's doable," she answered. "The other thing I need to discuss with you now is that I want is your assistance flushing out my mole. You're in an excellent position to do that since he or she has been sending you the audio files. You said you fired your guy who has been receiving the files?"

"Yes, Ros fired him this morning," I confirmed.

"I don't suppose you could get him back?" she asked.

"Why the hell would I do that?" I asked.

"Because," she explained, "whoever this asshole is at Ismintis, he or she obviously trusts your guy. It might be hard to set up someone else for him to send more files to."

I picked up my phone and summoned Ros, and then I went and unlocked my door. A minute later, Ros stormed in. "What the hell are you thinking, Grey?! This is the worst media shit storm we've ever seen! Oh, hello, Ms. Steele."

"Ms. Bailey, it's nice to meet you," Anastasia replied politely as she extended her hand. "Please call me Ana."

"Ana, call me Ros," Ros replied as she shook her hand.

I said, "Ros, we'll get around to dealing with PR. For the moment, we have other fish to fry. As you know, Anastasia has a mole, and we're going to help her set a trap and catch the fucker. I've shared a couple of the audio files with Anastasia. After this meeting, I'd like you to forward them all to her. She has agreed to no legal action. We will sell her Sunset Media, McPherson Communications, and SIP for the price she offers. She's only sure about SIP at the moment but will let us know within a week about the other two. Now, tell us about the fucker you fired this morning."

"Boyd Henry," Ros replied. "Excellent work. Never had any reason to suspect him of any illegal or unethical activity. It came as a shock, really."

"How soon can you get him back here?" I asked her.

Ros looked shocked. "Why would I do that?" she asked. "Oh, no, I get it. To help flush out the mole, of course. I should have thought of that before I fired him." She stood up and walked toward the door. "Give me ten minutes," she said as she opened the door.

"Hey, Ros," I called out, "Lock the door behind you."

"Sure thing, boss," she replied. She looked at Anastasia and winked before she closed the locked door behind her.

Anastasia spoke before the door was completely closed. "So let's review what we know about this guy," she said. "He or she sent emails from bogus accounts at Ismintis. You're saying that he created accounts for people that don't exist, right?" When I nodded, she asked, "Wouldn't he need administrative access to the server to create a new email account? That would narrow it down."

"Not if he has the skills to hack his way in," I replied grimly.

"So, do you think I can track it back to the computer the emails were sent from? Or computers, if there's more than one?" she asked.

"Yes, I do. My guy Barney Sullivan could do that. In fact, I can get him on it now, but it would mean hacking into your system. If you have a good tech guy that you trust, he should be able to do it."

"I do," Ana responded, "Samantha Gilbert. And I'm sure that she can do it. She used to work for the FBI in Cybercrimes. She can hack into anything. She'll know how to find where the emails originated. In that case, we may not need Boyd Henry after all."

"I still want to question him," I said. "And I want you to have an opportunity to question him too. If Ros can get him back here, I'll set something up for Monday."

"Yes, do that," she responded.

I studied her face for a minute. The circles under her eyes had gotten darker, and she looked completely exhausted. I considered sending her home for a nap, but I knew she would tell me to fuck off if I suggested it. I'm sure she still felt she had too many fires to put out. But I knew that I could help her relax for a few minutes. It would do her good to clear her mind.

I checked the time before I said to Anastasia, "We still have to meet with our PR teams and issue some kind of statement about what we were doing together today. I think we should get them together to make sure our statements match up. But… we have something else I think we should discuss first." I picked up her hand and began to caress her wrist.

"Christian," she said breathlessly. "I don't think this is a good idea. We can't hide…"

"We don't have to hide, Ana," I said. I lifted her wrist to my lips and kissed it. Then I started licking circles on her wrist, and I watched in delight as her nipples protruded through her blouse.

"Christian…" she stammered. "We're trending on Twitter. You know how crazy the paparazzi are going to be tonight. We can't go to that party. Not now."

I began to suck her wrist, and I put my other hand on her knee and caressed it. "Shh," I said. "Close your eyes, Ana. Let me take care of you." Immediately, she closed her eyes. Yes! I wanted to shout for joy, but instead I spoke softly into her ear, "Ana, we are going to the play party tonight. We don't have to stay long, but we're going. You promised me that you would go, no matter what happened today, remember? If you go back on your word, you realize that makes you a liar, right? And you have a reputation for keeping your word."

"Why are you doing this, Christian?" she asked, keeping her eyes closed and relaxing her body more. I could feel her resolve slipping.

"Because I really like you, Ana," I responded. I moved my hand up her leg, under her skirt, and began to massage her inner thigh. At the same time, I lowered her hand from my lips and rested it on my leg. I removed her glasses from her face and then removed the pins that held her hair.

"Nothing good can come from this," she said as I ran my fingers through her hair. I could sense the moment when she gave in to the desire to submit to me, and I knew that she was ready to let me do whatever I wanted to do.

"I disagree," I responded as I moved both of my hands to cup her face. I nibbled her ear and then began to kiss her neck as I moved my hands to her hair. My God, she was delicious. "Good things have already come from it." I kissed the side of her chin, and sucked on it a little. "You've had your first of many great orgasms from me, and we haven't even had sex yet." I kissed down her neck, unbuttoned the top two buttons of her blouse with one hand, and caressed her breast with the other hand. "I had the satisfaction of watching you come apart in my hands." I kissed and sucked the cleavage that I'd just exposed. "And don't overlook the fact that we have uncovered a conspiracy in your organization." I continued to kiss, lick, and suck her delicious cleavage. She tasted like freshly harvested apples with vanilla butter. "I'd say we could be a really great team." I began to massage her nipples through her blouse and bra, and I kept kissing her. "You just have to give it a chance. Can you trust me with this, Ana, as much as you trust me with business?" I unbuttoned two more buttons, exposing her bra.

Anastasia moaned as I used my teeth to pull down her bra cup, and my lips found her nipple. Her breathing was erratic, and she stammered as she spoke. "You promise… if I go with you tonight… that we're just going to… to watch?"

Oh, baby, let me just show you what you have to look forward to. I sucked her breast and continued to massage the other one for a couple of minutes before I answered her. "I promise." After a few more moments of attention to her delectable breast, I said, "We won't play unless you ask for it after we get there. If you ask me for it, we will do it. I won't pressure you, I promise." I won't have to pressure her. Once we get there, she's going to want to play. I'm certain of it.

She moaned again, causing my erection to strain against my zipper uncomfortably. I was going to need some relief soon. "OK, oh God… I'll do it," she said. "Don't… don't make me regret trusting you, Christian. Oh my God."

Yes! I didn't show her my excitement at her acceptance. Instead, I commented, "You're so responsive, Ana. I think I could make you come through nipple play alone. Would you like that?"

She opened her eyes for the first time since I'd asked her to close them. "What, here?" she asked incredulously. "Now? In your office? Won't your staff hear us?"

"I guess you're just going to have to be quiet," I responded, as I continued to kiss, suck, and lick her exposed nipple while I tweaked, massaged, and played with the one that was still covered under her bra. I didn't tell her that my office was soundproof. I wanted to see how well she could follow my instructions, and I wanted to see how quiet she could be for future reference. Oh the places we could play, the fun we could have, if she could be quiet enough. "Now, Ana, I thought I told you to close your eyes. Do I need to blindfold you, or can you follow instructions?"

"No, Mas…. Christian! I can follow instructions, and I want to. I want this." She closed her eyes. My God, she was perfect. Just amazingly fucking perfect.

"Ana, just like last night, from now until you come, call me Master. I know you want to. Go ahead and do it," I commanded.

"Yes, Master!" she responded.

I pulled down her other bra cup and began to lave her nipple with my tongue. I caressed her other breast before pinching and pulling on her nipple. She moaned loudly when I bit her nipple.

"Shh," I said as I caressed her face, "you're going to have to be quiet, Ana." I returned my attention to her breasts.

"Oh God, please, Christian! Please!" she moaned quietly.

I pinched her nipple hard. "Master," I reminded her, and then I asked, "What do you want, Anastasia?"

"Please, I want to come," she begged.

"And so you will, princess. Now, keep your eyes closed." I picked her up and laid her down across my desk. "I'm not going to restrain you this time, Ana. Instead, I want you to touch your breasts. I want you to play with your nipples. Do that now." I watched her as she obeyed, and I had to unzip my trousers and free my cock even though I didn't plan to fuck her yet. I wouldn't fuck her until she asked me to, at the play party. I reached up her skirt and said, "Lift your hips for me, baby." She obeyed, and I slipped her panties down her hips and legs. I pocketed them as I watched her continue to play with her nipples.

She moaned again. "Please, may I come, Master?" she asked.

"Not yet, princess," I answered. "I want to taste you first. You're going to come in my mouth. Would you like that, baby?"

"Oh, God yes! Yes, Master!" she responded.

"Lift your hips again, princess," I commanded as I unzipped her skirt. "Let me get you out of this so I can see all of you." I stared at her naked body spread out on my desk. Never had I seen such perfection. "Now, Ana, you're doing perfectly. Don't stop touching yourself. And don't come until I give you permission. Now, spread your legs for me, baby."

"Oh, yes, Master!" she responded. She immediately obeyed, and moaned loudly as my mouth found her center. She was already so wet she was dripping, and her taste… delicious didn't begin to describe it. I'd gone down on a lot of women, but none of them even came close to Ana's sweetness.

I lifted my head and said, "Shh! Ana, I warned you, you have to be quiet. If you can't be silent, we're going to have to stop this and finish later."

"No, please, Master! I'll be quiet! Please don't stop!" she begged.

As I licked around her clit and sucked it into my mouth, I knew she wasn't going to last long. I inserted two fingers into her opening and began to pump her as I sucked her clit. Her legs began to shake as she tried to hold back the orgasm.

"Please, Master," she begged.

"OK, come for me, princess," I replied when I knew she couldn't hold back any longer. She moaned loudly as she was overcome by the full force of what was probably the most powerful orgasm she'd ever had. I removed my fingers and inserted my tongue into her entrance, licking and sucking her cream as she continued to writhe in the throes of passion. The orgasm went on and on, and I continued to suck her dry. Finally, as she quieted down, I lifted my head and looked at her. Her eyes were still closed, and she was panting.

"Anastasia, my beautiful princess… do you realize what you did?" I asked her gently.

"Yes, Master," she answered. "I forgot to look in your eyes. But it was so intense, I couldn't keep my eyes open. And I'm not sure how you even knew that, since your head was between my legs."

"We're going to have to work on the eye contact," I responded. "Now, open your eyes and look at me."

"Yes, Master," she replied as she looked at me.

"Do you know what else you did? Or failed to do?" I asked.

"No, Master," she answered. "What?"

I answered, "You stopped playing with your nipples. I told you not to stop."

"But..." she started to argue, but stopped herself.

"It's OK, Ana. Say what you want to say," I told her.

"Master, I was coming," she explained. "I couldn't... My nipples are too sensitive when I'm coming."

"Is that right?" I asked. I started tweaking her nipples as I asked, "How about after you come? How sensitive are they now?"

She moaned and answered, "Still very sensitive, Master. Oh!" She squeezed her eyes shut, and I could see that she was getting aroused again already.

"Do you think you have another one in you, Ana?" I asked as I squeezed her nipples.

She moaned. "Already, Master?" she asked incredulously. "I... I don't know..."

I chuckled as I continued to tug on her nipples. God, she was so much fun, so responsive, so fucking beautiful. "You do, Ana. I'm going to make you come again. Spread your legs as far as you can and keep them open. Let me see that pretty pussy. Keep your eyes open this time. Look at me, Ana."

She looked me in the eyes as I kept playing with her nipples. "Are you going to punish me?" she asked.

"Do you want me to?" I asked as I continued to tweak her nipples, and I blew on her pussy.

She squirmed and replied, "I don't know."

I leaned down and licked up her pussy while I continued my attention to her nipples. "Sure you do," I said. "You're just afraid. But you want it, admit it."

She moaned again before she replied, "But we don't have a contract yet. You can't punish me before we sign a contract, can you, Master?"

"Sure I can, if we both want me to," I answered. "And you want me to, don't you Ana?" I squeezed her nipples hard, paying attention to how well she received the pain. Perfect! She would do beautifully with nipple clamps, and I couldn't wait to see how they looked on her.

She squeezed her eyes shut when she felt the pain in her nipples, but then she snapped them open again and looked in my eyes. She paused another moment before she answered, "Yes, Master… but not right now. Not in your office. But later, yes. I think so, Master. You're right that I'm still afraid, but I'm curious."

"Later then, princess," I agreed before I went down on her again. It only took a couple of minutes before I could feel that she was on the edge again. I stopped, moved my hands away from her breasts, and looked up at her.

She moaned and cried out, "Please, Master, let me come again."

"I will, pet, but you have to do something for me this time," I told her.

"Do you want to fuck me? Please fuck me, Master!" she cried.

"Oh, Ana! Those are beautiful words, and I can't tell you how happy it makes me to hear you say them," I replied. "But I'm not going to fuck you yet. Here's what we're going to do, princess. I'm going to finger fuck you like last night. And you're going to put your hands on my cock. Do it now, Ana."

She reached out, wrapped both hands around my cock, and squeezed. "Would you like me to give you a blowjob, Master?" she asked.

Oh, yes! Yes, I would like that a lot! "God, Ana, you're killing me. No, not right now. If I let you do that, it would be topping from the bottom. I'm in charge here, not you. Don't forget it. Now do as I say. Pump me with your hands until I come on your tits."

She started moving her hands up and down my cock rapidly, squeezing me perfectly. "Like this, Master?" she asked.

"Yes, just like that," I answered. "Now Ana, no matter what I do, don't close your eyes. Don't look away from me. And don't come until I give you permission. We're going to come together this time." As I spoke, I started fucking her again with three fingers. We gazed in each other's eyes as we both got closer to climax, and I felt myself falling again, experiencing a feeling I didn't understand, totally mesmerized by her blue eyes.

When I knew she was almost there, I told Ana, "Open your mouth, baby," and when she obeyed, I stuck my pinky finger in her mouth. "Now suck," I ordered her. Her eyes grew wide, but she clamped her lips closed and sucked my finger with all her might while we continued to gaze in one another's eyes. When I could see that she was struggling, and I couldn't hold back any longer either, I took my finger from her mouth, reached behind her, and inserted it into her asshole. At the same time, I commanded her, "Come with me, baby!"

Ana maintained eye contact with me perfectly as we both fell off the edge together. She cried out as the force of her orgasm hit her. This was her third one with me, and each one was stronger than the previous one. She tried to close her legs, but I held them open without removing my finger from her asshole. I pumped my finger in her ass throughout her orgasm. Meanwhile, she continued to stroke my cock as I covered her tits with my semen. She was the most beautiful sight I had ever seen, all laid out on my desk and covered in my cum.

As our climaxes were fading, I removed my finger from her ass and told her, "Perfect, Ana. Now, don't move." I went into restroom and took my time getting a wet cloth to clean her with. I was testing her. I wanted to see if she would obey me and remain on the desk like I'd left her, with her legs splayed open, uncovered. When I went back into my office, I was impressed to find her exactly as I'd left her. As I cleaned her with the cloth, I told her, "Anastasia, my princess, you are a perfect submissive. Perfect. My God, I'm in awe of you."

"Thank you, Master," she whispered.

I smiled at her and said, "OK, Ana, sit up. We're finished playing now, baby, so don't call me Master again. And I won't call you princess. I'll only call you that when we play. Now, let's get dressed and put on our CEO hats again."

As we got dressed, Ana asked, "Can I have my panties back, Christian?"

"Nope," I answered.

Her eyes got wide. "Christian, seriously, give me my panties. I have to go back to work. I have to meet with my PR team. I can't work without panties."

"Sure you can, Anastasia," I responded. "No one will know except us. Look how long your skirt is. You're not in any danger of giving anyone a peep show, but it will make things easier if you decide to give me one when we're alone again later." I gave her my megawatt smile.

She looked like she was going to argue with me, but then she bit her bottom lip, which of course turned me on again. Then she couldn't hold back her giggle, which turned me on even more. "You're insane," she said, and she slapped my arm playfully. For a moment, I almost panicked. But it was just my arm, and it was Ana. It was OK.

For a moment, neither of us spoke as we finished getting dressed. Then Ana looked at me thoughtfully. She said, "You're not what I thought a Dom would be, Christian. Well, you are in some ways. But I didn't expect... tenderness. I love it when you command me, but I love it more because you do it... nicely. I was afraid of feeling demeaned. Humiliated. I like that you call me princess and baby, not bitch or slut or whore. I've read a lot about this, and I know some subs like being talked to like that when they're in a scene. But I don't. And you knew that, didn't you?"

"Yes, baby, you told me last night," I answered. "But Ana... we haven't really done a scene yet. I'm not always so... tender, as you put it. I'm not going to call you my bitch or slut, but I am going to be more strict once we're in a contract. I am going to punish you. We've only been doing this since yesterday, and we haven't even gotten around to talking about our contract yet."

She studied me as she ran her fingers through her hair. "You're right. OK, so we need to set a time to talk about the contract. How about tomorrow?"

I smirked at her. "Tomorrow sounds good. After you sleep." I chuckled and said, "You're really going to do this, aren't you? You're going to sign a contract with me. You're going to be my sub. And baby, I have to say... I'm in awe of you. The way you are always in control, until you yield it to me. I fucking love that."

"Be warned, Christian," she responded. "If you try to control me at any time that I'm not willing to yield to you, we're going to have a problem."

"I'll keep that in mind," I told her.


	8. Chapter 8: Media Frenzy, Part 2 (APOV)

**Chapter 8: The Media Frenzy, Part 2** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"What are we going to tell the public about our… relationship?" I asked Christian, as I walked back into his office from the adjoining restroom, where I had just finished pinning my hair up and checking my appearance. Christian was sitting at his desk, and I sat down across from him. He had just gotten off the phone with Ros, who had talked with Boyd Henry again and convinced him to meet us on Monday morning. Henry also promised Ros that he had not spoken with anyone at Ismintis since being fired this morning, and that he would not. Now, we needed to deal with our PR teams… and the media frenzy that our lunch date had stirred up.

"Why the fuck do we have to tell them anything. It's none of their goddamn business," Christian responded to me.

"You know how this works," I replied. "If we don't give them something, they're going to hound us until they get something. I'm afraid to even leave GEH because I know what's waiting outside here and at Ismintis. And Escala."

"So, what do you want to tell them?" Christian asked.

"Well…" I thought about it for a moment. "We could say we're friends."

"Friends," Christian repeated, as if he had a bad taste in his mouth.

"Is that so bad?" I asked. "Could you consider me your friend?" I studied his face. Why was he so opposed to a friendship with me? Did he really only want a fuck partner? Would I be OK with that?

"I don't want to be your fucking friend, Anastasia. I want to be your fucking Dom," Christian answered.

"Why can't you be both?" I asked. "You know we're going to have a business relationship. We already do. You haven't even once, that I've noticed, tried to dominate me when we've been talking business. You're smart; you're astute; you know better than to try to control my business decisions."

"You're not my employee, Anastasia," Christian responded. "In business, you're not mine to control."

"Well, I'm glad you realize that," I said. "So… do you like having a business relationship with me?"

"Yes, of course. You're brilliant," he responded without hesitation.

I wanted to giggle. Christian Grey thought I was brilliant. But I maintained a professional demeanor. "Well, then, would you say we're just business acquaintances? Or are we more than that?"

"You have to ask, Anastasia?" Christian asked, sounding a little hurt.

I was insistent as I answered, "Yes, Christian, I have to ask, because you just said you don't want to be my fucking friend but just my fucking Dom. And I want both of those things, as well as a business relationship."

"Anastasia, I think you know what I meant," Christian responded.

"No, Christian, you're wrong. I don't," I said. "Do you remember at lunch today when I was concerned that you were losing something in our deal, and you laughed at me, and I said that I already considered you a friend? Like overnight, I went from hating you to admiring you? Do you remember that, Christian?"

"Yes, Anastasia," he replied.

"And tell me this, Christian," I continued, "Why did you offer to give me all three of those businesses? You offered me almost a hundred million dollars worth of business. And I know you, Christian, so I know you aren't crazy or stupid. So why?"

Christian replied, "Because we wronged you, Anastasia. It doesn't matter that we didn't know about it. We took those businesses from you dishonestly, so you deserve to have them back."

"And you're doing the right thing by selling them back to me at a loss," I responded. "Not giving them to me. Why did you offer that, Christian? That wasn't a business move. It was personal."

"Because... I like you, Anastasia. And I want you. I wanted to impress you. I want you to be my submissive, Ana, and I'll do just about anything to convince you."

"Christian, you know those fifteen subs you told me about?" When he nodded, I asked, "How many of them would you have offered a hundred million dollars to? And trust that they'd turn you down?"

Christian cleared his throat, and he refused to answer.

"Let me guess," I said. "None of them, right?"

"Ana, what exactly is your point?" Christian finally asked.

"I want you to admit it, Christian. You do want me to be your fucking friend, not just your fucking submissive. You want to go sailing with me, Christian. You invited me, remember? How many of your fifteen submissives did you go sailing with?"

"None, Ana," he answered. "You've made your point, OK? I just... don't normally do friendship. I tried it once. It wasn't a positive experience."

"Christian, I like you. Really fucking like you. There's a lot we haven't defined yet about whatever this is happening between us, but one thing I know... I want to be your friend. Not just your submissive. Not just a fuck partner. I like talking with you too. I like spending time with you."

"I agree, Ana," Christian said. "OK, I admit it. I want to be your friend."

"There now, was that so difficult?" I teased him.

"You have no idea," he responded. "I... I don't do friendship, Ana. I'm not sure I know how. Like I mentioned, I had a friend once... at least someone I considered a friend. I'll tell you about her sometime... later. Needless to say, she wasn't really my friend. She turned out to be a manipulative bitch who was only my so-called friend because she wanted to control me. The hardest part of it is that she's still friends with my parents, and I can't tell them what she did. Anyway, that's another story for another day. But she's the only frame of reference I have. I didn't have any friends growing up. I was a... troubled child. So anyway, you're right, I do want to be your friend, if I can figure out how the hell that works. I know that for the first time ever, I want to get to know you. I like talking with you. I've never experienced that before."

I stared at him. He was serious. He was opening up to me. But I couldn't for the life of me understand how Christian Grey could think that he doesn't have friends, or that he doesn't know how to be a friend. I really wanted to know about the woman who had hurt him, but I wouldn't push him to tell me. "Well, Christian," I said. "I'm glad we agree on the fact that we want to be friends." I leaned towards him and kissed his lips chastely.

He smiled back at me. "Me too, Ana." And he kissed me back, a little less chastely.

I broke away, took a few seconds to catch my breath, and asked him, "So... are you OK with telling the public that we're just friends? Keep it simple? We were having a friendly lunch?"

"It won't satisfy the vultures," Christian replied. "But we can try it. The problem is… if Kate's description was accurate, we look like we're more than friends. And the other problem is… how often do you have lunch dates with friends during the work week? How many friends do you have that you go to lunch with at all? Not to mention male friends who run multi-billion dollar corporations like your own? And you know my answers to those questions... none. What happened today is out of the ordinary for both of us. The rumors are going to continue. We can't stop them."

I blew out air in frustration. "OK, let's get our PR teams on this. We need to get them on the same page. I need to get back over to Ismintis and talk with my team."

"I have a better idea," Christian said. "Let's go together to my conference room and meet my team there and skype yours in. That way we're all communicating together at the same time, on the same page. It will simplify everything."

"Good idea," I answered. "Maybe I won't have to go back to Ismintis at all this afternoon. I've been dreading it since learning about my little problem. Besides, I won't be having any important conversations in my office again until I get rid of that bug."

About twenty minutes later, we were sitting in the conference room of the executive suite of GEH, where Christian's PR team were browsing through images of Christian and me on our lunch date, projected up on one of the two screens in the room. There were dozens of photos from the restaurant alone, not to mention the shots the paparazzi took as we were leaving. Kate's description was spot on; we looked like we were in love. I glanced at Christian a few times as we viewed the photos. His face remained impassive, and he didn't speak.

On the other screen, my PR team was assembled in my conference room at Ismintis and projected via Skype, and they could see the same images that we were viewing. Both teams were discussing strategy and largely ignoring both Christian and me. I was so exhausted and had run out of patience by the time the same image appeared for the third time on the screen; It was the one of me and Christian with our faces only a couple of inches apart, looking like we were about to kiss.

"Enough!" I called out.

"Turn it off," Christian ordered at the same time. Apparently, he was just as tired of looking at the photos as I was.

"Do you want to read some of the tweets?" one of Christian's people asked eagerly.

"No," Christian answered curtly.

Curtis, who was my head public image strategist, spoke up. "There are some pretty good ones, Ana. You should…"

I cut him off. "How can any of this possibly be good, Curtis?" I asked.

"Are you kidding?" he responded. "Ana, this could be great for your image, if we handle it right! You've been needing to soften your edges a bit. I've been telling you… the public thinks you're a cold-hearted bitch. This could be a great way to set them straight."

"What are you suggesting?" Christian asked. He didn't seem pleased at all with Curtis.

"I'm suggesting…" Curtis began, and Robin, my Media Relations Manager, spoke up, interrupting Curtis.

"Give them what they want," she finished Curtis's sentence. "Tell them you're in a relationship. Be seen together out on more dates like the one today."

"But…" I started to object.

"No," Christian said at the same time, and I didn't finish my sentence. Even though I wasn't keen on announcing anything so personal to the public, especially when I wasn't even sure what was happening between Christian and me, I couldn't help but wonder why he was so adamantly opposed to the idea.

"Mr. Grey," one of his team members spoke up, "if I may, sir… They're right. This could greatly improve your public image. Your prolonged silence on the topic has only caused rumors to escalate. Until today, the public opinion about both you and Ms. Steele was that you were both gay."

"I don't give a shit what the public opinion is," Christian muttered.

"Yes, I know, but you should, sir," the guy continued, "because your image is GEH. When people think of GEH, they think of you. And GEH will be more successful if people have a positive image of you."

Another one of Christian's people spoke up, "Sir, Travis is right. And the same thing goes… that if people have a negative image of you, then GEH suffers. And sir, the letter you sent last week outlining declining profits… there's your evidence, sir."

Before Christian had a chance to reprimand his employee, even before she had finished her sentence, I spoke up. "Excuse me, let me stop you. What's your name?"

"My name is Britney Harris, Ms. Steele."

I walked towards her and looked in her eyes. "Britney, any GEH correspondence you received from your CEO is confidential. You shouldn't mention it in the presence of me or my team that is here via Skype. Or anyone else outside of GEH. None of my team has signed a nondisclosure agreement, but you have, I'm sure."

Britney's face turned scarlet, and she stuttered, "Umm, right… I'm sorry, I wasn't…"

Christian interrupted her, "That will be all, Ms. Harris. You can go."

"I'm sorry, sir," she responded. She quietly left the room.

I looked into the camera at my team and said, "Anything you just heard about GEH, strike it from your memory."

Christian wasted no time addressing the room as soon as Britney had closed the door behind her. "There will be no press release today stating that Ms. Steele and I are, as you put it 'in a relationship.' The fact of the matter is that we just met this week. It's too soon for us to be 'in a relationship.' Nothing between us is defined yet except that we're friends. We aren't dating. That's the God's honest truth. Now, whether or not you think it would be good for our public images… I don't give a shit. I'm not going to lie to the public to spin some kind of idiotic romantic bullshit. We're friends. That's all. Tell them that."

Robin asked me, "Is that what you want too, Ana?"

"Yes," I answered. "Mr. Grey and I are friends. Like he said, it's too early for us to say any more than that. We don't need to comment on all the rumors. Just tell them that we're friends and we have no further comment. But… I'll take your recommendations into consideration, for future reference."

Christian and I instructed our teams to issue a joint statement to the press: "Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele are friends. They have no other comment at this time." Both of our teams tried to persuade us to give more information, but we both refused. We all knew that the public interest would not wane anytime soon no matter what statement we gave them.

Back in Christian's office, I sat down on the sofa and breathed a loud sigh. I wasn't accustomed to sleepless nights, and it was catching up with me. I checked the time: 4:35 p.m. I wasn't sure I had the energy to return to Ismintis at this point, and I didn't want to.

Christian sat down next to me on the sofa and took my hand. "You're exhausted," he observed, and then he suggested, "Why don't you lie down and take a power nap?"

"I can't do that," I responded. "I'm not a napper. If I lie down here and fall asleep, I'm not likely to wake up until tomorrow."

"Well, we can't have that," Christian teased. But he put his arm around me, and I rested my head on his shoulder. We both put our feet on the coffee table and relaxed.

"No, we can't. I have to go home and get ready for my hot date tonight." I smiled suggestively at him.

"Mmm hmm," he responded, and he looked at my feet. "Don't forget your shoes from last night. They're sexy as fuck."

"Christian… are you sure about this event? If we're recognized…? But you've been attending these things for years now, and word hasn't gotten out… So you're sure that we won't have photos online of us tomorrow doing God knows whatever we end up doing tonight?"

"I promise," Christian replied. "It's safe. There are other high profile people who attend these things. You're likely to see faces you recognize. Famous athletes, actors, even news anchors. Stop worrying about it. I'll take care of you."

"OK. I trust you," I replied.

We sat in silence for a couple of minutes, and I was trying to will myself to get up and head back to Ismintis. But then Christian spoke. "Ana, I need to tell you something. We haven't talked about limits yet, but I need to tell you one of my hard limits. You can't touch my chest or back, Ana. I'm a little uncomfortable sitting here with you like this because I know at any minute, you could reach your hand up and touch me. It would be a natural thing to do. But don't. Be careful to never touch me there."

I wanted to ask him why, but I instinctively knew that he didn't want to talk about it. There was something expressly sad in his tone. So I simply answered, "OK, Christian. I promise I won't touch your chest or back. Your arms, legs and face are OK though, right?"

Christian replied, "Yes, but use caution. Maybe warn me first. If we're in a scene, you should never touch me at all, unless I command you to. But in times like this, when we're just relaxing… If I think you might touch my chest, I might react violently without meaning to. I don't want to hurt you like that.

I processed that for a moment, and then, since this conversation felt too heavy, I decided to lighten the mood. "How about here?" I asked as I stroked his cock. "Is it OK for me to touch you here?"

He smiled as he answered, "Not without permission, princess. You're going to pay for that." But he didn't stop me for another minute or so. I was considering unzipping his trousers and freeing him when he took hold of my hand and said, "That's enough. Learn this now, Ana. I will always take the lead. I will always be the one to command you, not vice versa. Don't try to change that."

I swallowed before I responded. "Christian, I'm a submissive. I wasn't sure until last night, but now, I don't have a doubt. It gives me a release like I never imagined. I like being in charge of my business, of my life, of the decisions I make on a day to day basis. But I need a break from that. I need to be able to let go. When I let go and give you control over me, it feels good. I really like it."

"You realize I've gone easy on you so far, right?" Christian asked. "I've taken things slower than I ever have before. Nobody's ever accused me of being…what was your word? Tender?"

I didn't respond to his question. "Is that why you haven't fucked me yet?" I asked bluntly.

"For someone with such a history of unsatisfactory fucks, you sure are getting impatient for it," Christian teased. But then he grew serious. "Anastasia, you're new to this, so I'm being more patient than I normally am. I haven't fucked you yet because I decide when and where and how we fuck. Not you. And if you were my sub… I mean if we already had a signed contract… I would throw you over my lap right now and spank the shit out of you for how you touched my cock just now without permission. Then I'd tie your hands behind your back, and you'd kneel before me and take my cock down your throat. How's your gag reflux, Anastasia?"

Holy shit! Now this was what I expected a Dom to be like. I wondered if he could see how much his words were turning me on. Gag reflux? I'd only given a few blowjobs, so I didn't know how to answer that question. "Umm… I don't know, Christian. But if you want to do that… then go ahead and do it. We don't have to have a signed contract yet. I want you to punish me." I realized when I said the words that I meant them. I had been wondering about punishments for years, and I trusted Christian. I wanted him to punish me. I looked forward to it.

But Christian shut me down with his words. "You want to satisfy your curiosity, and you want to have another orgasm," he commented dryly. "You still have a lot to learn about being a submissive. What I'm trying to tell you Ana, is that I'm a Dom. I decide if and when I'm going to punish you. You don't get to tell me whether I can or can't. You're new this, so I've been careful with you. I'm not going to be careful tonight. I'm not going to ask your permission. I'm going to do things my way tonight. And once I collar you, you will obey me without question."

"Yes, Master," I responded without hesitation.

"Ana," he said sternly, "I do love it when you call me Master. But just to keep things clear between us, from now on, never call me that unless you're wearing my collar. I don't want there to be any confusion between our business and personal lives, and now that we're complicating it even further by throwing friendship into the mix. There's a hell of a lot of difference between me when I'm the CEO of GEH talking to the CEO of Ismintis, and when I'm your Dom, or when I'm just your friend. I don't want us to confuse those roles. So from now on, I'll only be your Dom if you're wearing my collar. Is that clear?"

"Yes… Christian," I answered.

"Good." He leaned over and kissed my lips tenderly. "Now… this is business, so it's a suggestion, not a command. It's nearly 5:00 already. Why don't we call it a day? Do you really have to go back to your office?"

"Well, I've put it off this long," I answered. "Let me make a couple of phone calls. It's Friday, so most people will have gone home already.

I called my assistant Hannah first and touched base with her to make sure I didn't have any pressing business. I told her to reschedule another meeting I had scheduled for Monday morning and replace it with a meeting at GEH. She confirmed three other appointments for later in the week, and we ended the call. I then called Samantha and gave her instructions for looking into my security problem. Next, I called my COO, Jack.

"Ana! Where have you been all afternoon?" Jack answered cheerfully.

I immediately felt suspicious. Jack was never cheerful, and we never made small talk. He always answered the phone the same way, "Jack Hyde," even when he knew it was me. His serious nature and attention to detail were what made him a great COO. He didn't need to be outgoing to do his job well.

He didn't need to know, but I answered him anyway, "I'm still at GEH, and headed home from here. Everything OK on your end?"

Jack chuckled. Actually laughed out loud. It was the first time I'd ever heard him laugh, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out what was funny. "Yep, things are great. I'm already headed home. I have a date tonight. Rhonda. She's lovely. Can't wait."

So now Jack was telling me about his personal life? That was a first.

"OK, well I hope you have a great time," I responded pleasantly. But I was wondering when I had ever heard Jack describe a woman as "lovely"? His behavior was certainly odd, and I was on high alert anyway. Could Jack be the mole? My COO? Really?

"So, Ana, just out of curiosity…" Jack began, and then he chuckled again. "What are you doing at GEH? And what's going on with Christian Grey?"

What the hell? I laughed casually and answered pleasantly, "Well, Jack, not that it's any of your business, but I had lunch with Mr. Grey today, as I'm sure you and the entire country are already aware, and then we had business to conduct."

"You're doing business with GEH?" Jack sounded shocked.

"Yes," I answered. "I'm going to buy SIP from them." And they're going to help me flush out a rat. Are you my rat, Jack?

"Well…" Jack sounded confused for a moment, but then he said cheerfully, "Well, that's great, Ana! I'm glad they're willing to sell."

"Yes, so am I," I responded. "Well, that's all, I guess. Have a great weekend, Jack." I ended the call, and then I looked at Christian, showing my despair and frustration on my face, I'm sure. He was watching me, looking concerned.

"Damn it," I muttered. "My COO. My fucking COO. Do you know how hard it was to replace Marlo when he left two years ago? It took months. Do you know how hard it is to function without a COO? Shit! No, you wouldn't know. You've had Ros since the beginning." Then I changed my tone and joked with him, "Hey, how much do you pay Ros anyway? Maybe if I offer her a better deal…"

"Don't even think about it," Christian interrupted with a smile, but then he grew serious. "You think Jack Hyde is your mole?"

"Maybe," I answered. "His behavior was awfully suspicious just now. But… it can wait. I'm tired. Take me away, Mr. Grey. I'm ready to get my mind off work for a few hours."


	9. Chapter 9: Preparing to Play (APOV)

**Chapter 9: Preparing to Play** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"Would you like a ride home?" Christian asked.

"Or better yet, would you like a ride home?" I asked him. "I seem to recall you leaving your car at the Zig Zag Café earlier today."

"I'm sure Taylor has collected it by now," Christian replied. He got to his feet and pulled me up after him. "Come, ride with me. Sawyer can follow us with your car."

We went out to the reception area, where Taylor and Luke were both waiting for us, and Christian gave them both instructions, which I agreed to. In the car, Christian instructed Taylor to wear earphones so he couldn't hear our conversation.

On the ride home, Christian held my hand and gave me very detailed instructions. "When we arrive at Escala, we will enter the lobby together. You'll go to your place and I'll go to mine, and we will have exactly one hour to get ready. You are not to eat anything or drink anything alcoholic, but you may drink water or tea. You will take a bath first. Use mineral salts or bubble bath. Relax in the tub for exactly 10 minutes. Then, shave your legs, armpits, and bikini area. Make yourself nice and smooth for me. After your bath, use a nice smelling lotion. Apples? Vanilla? Whatever it is, wear it. Put your towel away, and don't wear a bathrobe. You should be naked as you finish getting ready. I want you to think about how beautiful you are, and I want you to remember how I've already made you come. Think about my tongue in your pussy as you get ready. Fix your make-up as you like it, but not too much. Wear that pink lip gloss that you were wearing last night. Take down your hair, and style it as you like, but keep it down. Once your hair and make-up are finished, then you will put on the dress. The package will be waiting for you, but don't open it until you have finished your hair and makeup. Wear only the dress, and these shoes." He handed me my Louboutins from last night.

"OK," I responded. "I feel like I should call you Master."

"Not yet, princess," Christian replied. "Wait for your collar."

"OK," I answered.

"In exactly one hour, send Sawyer down to the lobby to meet me. Alternately you could give me your elevator code, but I'd rather you wait on that. If things go as I expect them to go between us, we'll each share each other's security codes soon. But for tonight, Sawyer will bring me up to meet you. You will wait for me in your living room. I'll bring the rest of your attire and will finish dressing you myself."

"OK," I responded, breathlessly.

"Do you have any questions, Ana?" Christian asked.

"No, not yet," I answered.

"I'll have more instructions for you once we are on our way there," Christian said.

We arrived at Escala, walked into the lobby together, and went our separate ways. Once I got to my penthouse, I followed Christian's instructions to the letter. While in the bathtub, I relaxed, but I couldn't stop thinking about my business and the fact the someone there was double crossing me. Who would do such a thing? Jack? The truth was, in the almost two years that he'd been at Ismintis, I hadn't gotten to know him very well. He was normally very private and anti-social, which was why his behavior today had seemed so strange. I knew that he was single, never married, but until he mentioned his date with a woman today, I hadn't known him well enough to even know that he was straight. I thought back to my friend Marlo, who had started out as my COO, but then his partner got a very prestigious job in New York, and they moved. We still stay in touch. Perhaps I should see if he is willing to come back to Ismintis. Marlo had been a great COO, and I missed him.

Ismintis was a dream come true for me, and I would fight to the death for it. I would find the bastard who was trying to bring me down. I owed it to myself, and to my mom and grandma. My grandma was an immigrant from Lithuania who had taught me the concept of "Ismintis," which means "wisdom" or "good decision" in Lithuanian. That is what I prided myself in at Ismintis International, using wisdom to make good decisions. And none of it would have been possible without my mom. God, how I missed her. My mom and Bob had been killed almost two years ago, and not a day went by that I didn't think about them. They had believed in me, so much in fact that they invested their life's savings in me. They gave me the start up funds for my company, and then they left me with a large life insurance when they died. I would give any amount of money for them to be back in my life. I didn't need their life insurance policy. By the time they died, I was already a millionaire. What I needed was my mom. Everything I did at Ismintis, I did for her, in memory of her.

Exactly ten minutes. OK, Christian Grey. I wondered how he would possibly know how long I stayed in the bathtub before I shaved my legs, but then I decided that it wasn't the point. He wanted me to want to obey him. And I did. He was right; I was a perfect submissive.

After my bath, I rubbed vanilla scented lotion generously all over me, and then I did my make-up with smoky eyes, a little blush, and the pink lip gloss that Christian mentioned. I took down my hair and ran my fingers through it. That's all. That was how Christian would want it.

Once I was satisfied with my hair and makeup, I walked into my bedroom and opened the box that Christian had sent earlier that day and I'd placed on the bed after I got home.

Was this a dress? It looked more like some scraps of black leather and spandex fabric that were all somehow connected to each other, but barely. It certainly showed a lot more skin than it covered. The top half was made mostly of spandex, where there was any fabric. Basically, there was an X shape in the front and back, and while the front strips of fabric were slightly wider than those in the back, they still covered very little. The skirt was mostly leather, and there were gashes in the fabric so that parts of my hips and ass would be revealed.

I slipped the dress over my head and pulled it down over my body. It was skin tight. I pulled the skirt down as far as it would go, and it barely covered my ass. It had a back zipper that I struggled with a little since it was so tight. The top was easier to manage since it was nothing but tight spandex that formed an X over my breasts. Most of my breasts were still exposed; my areolas were barely covered, and the fabric was so thin that my nipples were visible… and I wasn't even aroused yet.

I spent several minutes just staring in the mirror, wondering who this was looking back at me. My chest and stomach were completely bare, as was most of my back, except for the narrow strips of fabric that formed the X, like in the front. I realized that the fabric could slip easily, and in that case, my entire breast would be exposed. The gashes in the fabric revealed most of my hips. Really, only the essentials were covered, and they barely were. I knew Christian didn't want me to wear panties; his instructions had been clear: only the dress. My God, I was really doing this. I had seen Kate in fetish wear many times, but none of it had been quite this revealing. How was I going to get to the car without being seen? And how many people would see me like this at the play party?

I glanced at my clock and headed back into my living room. I had to be there when Christian arrived, and he would arrive any second now. I had given Luke instructions to go to the lobby at the given time so that I wouldn't need to see him… or him see me in my lack of clothes. His instructions were to go straight to the security room after seeing Christian into the foyer.

I stood there waiting for Christian. I didn't want to sit down in the dress. I was afraid the fabric would rip or shift. And then it occurred to me. I'm a submissive. Submissives are supposed to kneel. Even though Christian hadn't made me kneel yet, I had studied this enough; I knew the correct position. And so, in the middle of my living room, I carefully got down on my hands and knees, checked the dress to make sure I was still covered, and then I spread my knees apart, sat back on my knees, put my head down, and waited. It was uncomfortable, but mercifully, I didn't have long to wait, as I heard the elevator ding, and Christian appeared a moment later. I knew I wasn't supposed to look at him according to the rules of a submissive. But I wasn't sure what Christian wanted, since he insisted that I look at him during orgasm. So I waited, with my eyes downcast.

He walked into the room, stood there for a moment, and then walked a circle around me. For at least a full minute, he didn't speak. Finally, he said, "Look at me."

My jaw dropped when I saw him. He was wearing skin tight black leather pants, a tight black t-shirt, and a black leather jacket. Those pants… wow! He looked good enough to eat.

From the hungry look in his eyes, he thought the same about me. He was carrying a black bag, which he dropped on the floor as he stood gazing at me.

"Stand up," he ordered. Immediately, I stood to my feet, which was not easy to do in that dress and those shoes. I felt clumsy. But I stood there looking at him, and he was gazing at me, taking in every inch of my body. He reached up and caressed the exposed underside of my breast, and my nipples immediately got hard, which he then rubbed through the thin fabric. He sniffed my hair and nuzzled my neck. For a long time, he spoke not a word, and of course neither did I, because I knew not to speak until he asked me a question.

Finally, he picked up the bag that he had dropped. "I have some things here for you," he said. The first thing he pulled out was a small red box. He opened it, and took out a pair of diamond earrings shaped like daisies. They were beautiful. I wanted to say so, but I held my tongue.

"Do you like them?" he asked.

"Yes, Master," I answered. "I love them."

"Ana, are you wearing a collar yet?" he asked.

I realized too late that I wasn't supposed to call him Master unless I had the collar on. "No, I'm sorry," I answered.

"Hold your hair for me so I can put these on you," he said. I was thankful that I had remembered to take out the earrings that I had been wearing earlier. I was sure that he would have been displeased if I had been wearing earrings already.

Christian reached into the bag again and took out a black collar. He held it out to me and said, "I bought this for you. Take it. Feel it. Look at it. Tell me what you see."

I took the collar and turned it over in my hands, feeling the shiny black leather and the gemstones, which formed tiny daisies all around it. I was touched that he had remembered that I like daisies. For someone who claimed not to be into hearts and flowers, he could have fooled me. From the yellow Gerber bouquet that he'd sent me that morning, to the earrings, and now even the collar, he showed that he actually cared what I liked. No, this wasn't all about him. I answered him, "I see a collar. It's beautiful. I love the daisy design of the gemstones."

"Do you want to wear this collar, Anastasia?" he asked.

"Yes. Yes, I do," I answered.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because I want to call you Master. I want to submit to you. I want you to be my Dom."

He gazed at me and asked, "What does that mean, Anastasia? What does it mean for me to be your Dom?"

I answered, "It means that I will do anything you ask me to. It means that I'm yours to do anything you want with."

He took the collar and bucked it around my neck. He said, "You are mine, Anastasia. You belong to me. You'll follow all of my commands, you'll obey me without question for as long as you wear this collar. You will call me Master, and I will truly _be_ your Master. You will wear this collar until I remove it from you, and you'll obey me as long as you wear it. If you remove it yourself, you will irrevocably break our agreement, and there will be no going back. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master," I answered.

"Say it," he prompted.

"This collar means that I belong to you. I'm yours, Master. I will obey you without question for as long as I wear it. I won't remove it myself. I'll wait for you to remove it."

"Why won't you remove it yourself?" he asked.

"Because I don't want to break my agreement with you, Master," I answered.

"How do you know that, Anastasia?" Christian asked. "We don't even have a contract yet."

"We will soon, Master," I answered, certain of my words. "I will sign a contract with you. I want to be your submissive."

"Do you know what your hard limits are, Anastasia?" Christian asked.

"I know some of them, Master. I don't want you to make me bleed. I don't want you to share me with other Doms. And… I'll swallow your semen, Master, but don't urinate on me. No urine or…"

"Anastasia, that's disgusting! I'd never do anything like that! Do you think that's what BDSM is?"

"I've read stories, Master," I answered. "Golden showers. I don't think most people in BDSM do that kind of thing, but some do. I don't want to."

"What else, Anastasia? Other hard limits?"

"Well, Master, you know this already. Don't humiliate me."

"Right," Christian acknowledged. "I will test your limits, Anastasia. I will learn how much you can tolerate without feeling humiliated. You must use your safe words to stop me from going too far. Is that understood?"

"Yes, Master," I answered.

"How do you feel about exposing yourself?" Christian asked. "Would it humiliate you?"

"I don't know, Master. What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, let me ask a different question. How do you like your dress, Anastasia?"

I knew I needed to be honest even if he didn't like my answer. "I… don't like it, Master."

Christian chuckled. "Why not, Anastasia?" he asked.

"It's too revealing, Master," I answered.

"Anastasia, you're wearing this dress for my pleasure, not yours. Do you understand that?" he asked.

"Yes, Master," I responded.

"At the party tonight, if it gives me pleasure to do this, how will you respond?" As he spoke, Christian pulled down the straps that covered my areolas so that my entire breasts were exposed. "It gives me a lot of pleasure to see your gorgeous tits on display like this. Will that be a hard limit for you?"

At the moment, I felt totally turned on, but I wasn't sure how I'd feel in a crowd. "I don't know, Master. I guess it depends on what the other people at the party are doing and how comfortable I feel with them."

"Anastasia, this is about pushing you beyond your comfort level. But I've noted that public exposure is a soft limit. Do you have any other limits that I need to know about?" Christian asked.

"Umm… not that I'm aware of, Master," I answered. How should I know, really? I've never done anything like this before.

"Anastasia, I promised you that we wouldn't play tonight unless you want to. Do you want to? No pressure. Don't feel like you need to say yes to please me. It's your call tonight because we aren't in a contract yet. In the future, you'll play when I say so, but tonight, you get to make that call."

I swallowed. Did I want to? "I don't know, Master. Like I said before, I don't know what it's going to be like. If I feel comfortable, then… maybe?"

Christian chuckled. "A few hours ago, you were adamant about not playing, but simply watching. Your resolve is slipping, princess. But remember, it's your call. I won't pressure you. I won't even ask you again tonight. If you want to play, you have to tell me. Is that clear?"

No, that wasn't clear. "But Master, how can I tell you when I am not supposed to speak to you until you ask me a question, or if I need to use a safe word?"

"Because I'm giving you permission now," Christian answered. "You have permission to talk to me, Anastasia. I only want you to be silent when we are in a scene, and I'll remind you when that time comes. But otherwise, talk to me. You don't need to wait for me to ask you a question. And if you decide that you want to play after we get there, you will look me in the eye and say, 'Master, please punish me.' Those four words. If I don't hear those words from you, we won't play tonight. Is that clear?"

"Yes, Master," I answered.

"Say it," he prompted.

"If I want to play, then I'll say, 'Master, please punish me.'"

"And Anastasia, if I punish you, I will also fuck you. Is that a hard limit? To fuck in public, at a play party, where other people will also be fucking?"

I considered it for a moment. "No, Master. If I decide to play, if I say those words, then I will be agreeing to fuck in public."

"Good. I think we've covered all the limits. I know you're OK with restraints. Can you think of any other hard or soft limits? I want to make sure we know as many of them as possible without a contract. This is very unusual for me to take a sub to a play party, especially one without a contract. I've never done that, Anastasia."

"Master, I have safe words," I responded. "I will use them if I need to. I'm new to this, you know, so I don't know all my limits yet."

"Right," Christian said. "Now... when I walked in tonight, I was very pleased at how you were kneeling, my perfect girl. I was already hard before I got here, just thinking about you in that dress, but you made me harder as soon as I laid eyes on you. And I'm so fucking hard right now it hurts to move. So, kneel, Anastasia. You're about to get your wish. You're going to suck my cock. You said you'd swallow my semen... Let's see how well you do with that."

Immediately, I fell to my knees and got back into the submissive pose. Yes, he was right. After the way he had eaten me out earlier that afternoon, I was desperate to repay the favor. I had never wanted to give a man a blow job before. I had done it, but only because they wanted it, not because I wanted it. But right now, I wanted it, maybe even as much as he did. I looked up at Christian and licked my lips as watched him release his erect cock. "Hands behind your back," Christian ordered, and I instantly obeyed. When he stood close enough to me, I stuck out my tongue and licked the pre-cum from his tip. It felt so naughty, so erotic, so good. Without further delay, I put my lips around his head and sucked him, hard.

"Oh, shit! Shit! Slow down, Ana! It's going to be over way too soon if you suck me like that!" Christian's eyes were heated, and full of not only lust but also something else. Wonder? Awe?

I spit him out as I looked up and said, "I'm sorry, Master. This sub is not very experienced with cock sucking."

"You could have fooled me," Christian whispered.

Before I put him back in my mouth, I licked up and down his shaft, making him moan. I did this a few times before putting my lips around him and sucking, not as hard this time. I wanted to use my hands too, but I knew he wanted me to keep them behind my back. If I moved them, I knew he would restrain them.

After a minute or two, Christian took charge. He took hold of my hair and held my head as he pumped my mouth. As he hit the back of my throat, I willed myself to relax my muscles and take him as far as I could without gagging. When I swallowed, Christian moaned loudly.

"Shit! I can't hold back, baby. I'm going to come, and you're going to swallow it. Look in my eyes as you suck me, pet."

I had never swallowed semen before. The few times I'd given a blow job, I had always stopped before he came. Up to now, the thought had seemed disgusting, but now, I didn't feel disgusted; I felt excited. I wanted to please my master; that thought excited me beyond anything. I looked in his eyes, and felt overjoyed when I saw the pure unadulterated pleasure there. As the hot spurts of ejaculate hit my throat, I swallowed, and I continued to suck. Christian moaned a few more times, and he held my hair so tight it was painful. I continued to suck him until he had emptied himself and had begun to grow flaccid. Only then did I spit him out and then lick his now soft penis a few more times. It felt so different than it had just moments ago.

Christian pulled away from me and said, "Holy fuck, Ana, are you trying to kill me? Where did you learn to give head like that?"

I didn't answer but simply smiled up at him.

"Stand up, princess," he ordered. When I obeyed him, feeling even more wobbly than I had the first time, he stared at me in amazement. "Answer me, princess. Where did you learn to give a blowjob like that?"

I felt my face blush, and I answered nervously, "Umm... Master, I've never given... I mean, I've done it before, but never... like that. I just... did what I thought you would like."

He continued to gaze in my eyes. I felt confused when I saw something that looked like fear in his eyes. "What are you doing to me, Ana?" he whispered.

"I'm... submitting to you, Master," I answered.

"You're bewitching me, princess. You're unmanning me."

I stared at him, unsure what to say. Unmanning him? What did he mean?

Christian apparently didn't expect me to answer him. He reached into his bag and took out a long black coat. "Here is another one of my hard limits. You will never expose yourself in public unless I undress you myself, and I would only ever do that if I know it is a safe environment. I have mixed feelings about it, even in a safe BDSM environment. I don't like the idea of other Doms ogling what's mine. But I want you to experience a play party, and I know that at the party we're going to, people will follow the rules. One rule in BDSM is that Doms don't fool around with other Doms' subs without express permission, and I'll never give them permission. But they will watch, and I know they will want what's mine, and that thought alone pisses me off, but I want you to have the full experience of a play party, at least once. With that said, hold out your arms." Christian adjusted my dress straps so that my nipples were covered again, and then he slipped the coat over my arms. He stood in front of me and buttoned up the coat, all the way up to the neck.

"There, now," he said, appraising me. "If anyone saw you between here and the party, they'd have no idea that you're on your way to a BDSM event.

"Yes, Master," I agreed, looking down at my coat, and then at him. "But the same can't be said for you."

He chuckled. "The shock on your face when you saw me… it was priceless. Nobody is going to see us, Anastasia. We're going from the elevator down to your private garage. Taylor has already pulled my car around from my side of the garage to yours."

"Are you sure you don't want to take my Rolls Royce, Master?" I suggested.

"I will be the one to decide everything tonight, Anastasia, including what car we take. You only have one decision to make. Four words, remember? That's all. What are those four words, Anastasia?"

"Please punish me, Master," I responded.

"I can hardly wait, Anastasia," he said. "If not tonight, then soon, in my playroom."

We went to the elevator and took it down to my garage, where of course, nobody saw us. Christian led me to the passenger side of his Audi R8, which I admired as he opened the door for me. Once I had gotten in, he strapped me in with an evil smirk. Neither of us spoke.

When he was behind the wheel, I said, "I like this car. I've been thinking about getting a sports car but haven't decided what model yet. You're a big Audi fan, aren't you?"

"I am," he responded as he drove out of the garage. "They're the safest cars on the market. And this baby drives like a dream."

"You should let me drive it sometime," I suggested. "That would help me decide if I should get one."

Christian chuckled. "You're forgetting yourself already, princess. You don't get to tell me what you think I should do while you're wearing my collar, Anastasia."

"Duly noted, Master," I responded, fully chastised. "But, if I may ask for clarification...?"

"Yes?" he asked.

"Are you saying that if I'm not wearing the collar, and if I ask you as my friend if I can drive your car, that you'll let me?"

Christian laughed loudly. "No, Ana, that's not what I said. I don't let anyone drive this car. Even Taylor doesn't get to drive her except to move her for me, on a rare occasion. She's my baby."

"Very well," I responded. "Then perhaps you'd be willing to go with me to the Audi dealership to test drive one?"

"You're forgetting yourself again, princess," Christian responded. "I'm not your friend right now, Ana. I'm your Dom. Don't forget it again. There will be no more talk tonight about what we will do together in the future as friends. Tonight, you will focus on being my submissive. Is that clear?"

I wasn't sure why Christian needed the clear distinction, but I accepted it like a good submissive. "Yes, Master. It won't happen again," I responded.

"I want you to talk with me freely, but don't forget who I am. Don't forget to call me Master. Don't forget that you belong to me."

"OK, Master," I responded. "I won't forget again."

"Good," Christian said, as he glanced at me and smiled. We drove in comfortable silence for a few minutes. Once we were on the freeway, Christian asked me, "Anastasia, what are my hard limits?"

"Umm… the first one you told me is that I can't touch your chest or back. The second one is that I can't expose myself in public unless you think it's safe… but then you'll do the exposing anyway, won't you, Master?"

"Yes, princess. Yes I will," he answered.

"I don't remember any other limits, Master."

"That's fine, Ana," he responded. "That's all you need to know for tonight. We'll discuss others when we negotiate our contract." He reached over and rubbed my knee. "We have over an hour to get there. Now, sleep. I will wake you up when it's time."

I closed my eyes and drifted off.


	10. Chapter 10: Play Party, Part 1 (CPOV)

**Chapter 10: The Play Party, Part 1** _(Christian's POV)_

I couldn't take my eyes off Anastasia as she dozed peacefully, looking so innocent and carefree. She was adorable and just… amazing. Have I mentioned that I'm in awe of her? Shit! What was happening to me? I was growing soft, unable to hold onto control. Flynn's words from our last session kept going through my head. Was I falling for her? But I didn't... couldn't... do love. But what was this new sensation I felt in my chest every fucking time I looked at her? And even though it scared the shit out of me, I wanted more. I craved more.

I couldn't have imagined a more perfect start of our evening than walking into her penthouse for the first time and finding her kneeling in her living room, waiting for me, in a faultless submissive pose. It took more self restraint than I remember ever having to exert to keep myself from fucking her right then and there. My God, was this really her first time as a submissive, other than the two short experiences she'd had with me just in the past few hours? My Anastasia truly had done her research. And I mentally patted myself on the back for choosing that dress; it seemed to have been designed especially for her delectable body. I had known when I picked it that it would showcase her perfect breasts, but I hadn't anticipated how beautifully it would accentuate her fine ass. The slits in the fabric were in all the right places, just barely covering her pussy, and the way she was kneeling with her knees apart, her pussy was delightfully not completely covered. I remembered her taste, and I licked my lips in anticipation. Anastasia Steele was going down tonight. She wanted it just as much as I did.

I had been curious about her penthouse, how similar it was to mine, and how she had decorated it. A person's style says a lot about their character, and I wanted to know more about her character. But once I was in her home, I had only taken a few seconds to glance around. Words that came to mind were warm, comfortable, and eclectic. I noticed landscape paintings on one wall, each with a different animal. Nazarenus. Anastasia had noticed the art in my office, and now I noticed that she too was a fan of local artists. Interesting, and not surprising. If you asked me now what color the walls were or what style the furniture was, I couldn't tell you, just that it felt cozy. But my attention was on Anastasia herself. That ass. Those tits. The way she continued to avert her eyes, like a perfect submissive. The way she obeyed me immediately when I told her to look at me and to stand up. The way she wobbled and caught her balance as she stood up on those mile-high sexy-as-hell stilettos. The way she self-consciously smoothed down her skirt to try to cover her ass and checked the front to make sure her nipples were covered. The way her nipples had hardened as soon as I'd touched her. My perfect Anastasia.

She'd shocked the hell out of me with that blowjob. I had expected that we would need to work on refining her oral skills. But damn if that wasn't the best blowjob I'd ever had, and I had had many... from women much more experienced than my Ana. She seemed to be inside my brain, knowing exactly how I wanted it. Absolute perfection.

As I watched her sleeping body now, in the car, I thought about taking off her coat so I could see her, but I decided not to disturb her yet. "Christian…" she muttered, and I glanced at her closed eyes. I started to correct her for calling me my name instead of Master, but I waited for her to speak again.

"Mmm… I like chocolate," she mumbled, and I smiled. She was dreaming. About me and chocolate. I liked the direction of her dream. Why couldn't I have dreams like that instead of my usual nightmares?

"Would you like me to lick chocolate off your tits, princess?" I asked her.

She didn't respond but moaned again a few times in her sleep. We were getting close to our destination, so it was time to wake her. "Ana," I called out. "It's time to wake up, baby." I touched her arm and shook her gently.

She opened her eyes and took in her surroundings. "Christian?" she asked.

"Ana, touch your neck and tell me what you feel," I commanded.

She obeyed, and when she felt her collar, her eyes raised momentarily. She swallowed and said, "My collar. I'm sorry, Master. I was disoriented and forgot I wasn't supposed to call you Christian. Now that I'm awake, it won't happen again."

I wanted to smile, but I kept a straight face. "Anastasia, were you dreaming before I woke you?" I asked.

"I don't know, Master," she answered. She took a moment to think about it. "I think maybe I was. Why do you ask? Did I say something? Umm, Master?"

I smirked. "Why would you think you said something? Do you have a habit of talking in your sleep?"

"Unfortunately, yeah, I do," she responded.

"You do what?" I asked.

She looked at me blankly, and then she caught herself. "Master! I sometimes talk in my sleep, Master."

"Well, that's not unfortunate at all," I responded. "Especially not when you're dreaming about me and chocolate. So let me ask you again what I asked you when you were talking in your sleep. Would you like me to lick chocolate from your luscious tits, princess?"

The traffic timing was perfect, as I had to stop at a red light, so I could look over at her. I watched in delight as her face turned crimson. We were stopped at a brightly lit intersection, and I could see her almost as clearly as in daylight. "Yes, Master, I think I would like that a lot."

"So would I. Melted chocolate and Ana. Delicious. Was that what you were dreaming about?" I asked.

"No, Master," she answered, and she looked embarrassed. Have I mentioned that she's adorable? My God, she was killing me.

"Well then tell me about your dream, Anastasia," I ordered her. The light turned green and I began to drive again, waiting for her to answer.

She swallowed and paused a moment before she answered, "Umm… I was the one licking the chocolate off you, Master. And umm… we were in my house. I wasn't… I wasn't wearing a collar in my dream. And you let me touch you. I don't mean in the no-touch area. I mean I didn't need to ask permission to… to touch you. To put chocolate on you. To lick you."

"Anastasia, where exactly were you touching and licking me?" I asked teasingly as I glanced her her.

I couldn't see her now, but I was sure that she blushed again as she answered, "Master, I think you already know, you just want to hear me say it. OK, then, Master. I was drizzling melted chocolate over your penis and then licking and sucking it off."

I immediately got hard, and I had to adjust my body. Anastasia noticed. The leather pants I was wearing were only for play parties; I never wore them any other time, not even in my playroom… I have my favorite jeans that I wear there. My erection in the leather pants was… prominent. The imprint of my entire engorged cock pressed against the thin fabric, begging to be set free. I took Anastasia's hand and rubbed it against my mushroom head. "You enjoyed sucking my cock, didn't you, princess?"

"Yes, Master," she responded without hesitation as she rubbed me just the way I wanted her to. "More than I expected to."

"But you said you'd done it before. Did you not enjoy it before?" I asked.

"No, Master, not like that. I gave it to my last two boyfriends. Not the first one. And with both of them, I did it for them, not for me." She paused for a moment before she started talking quickly. "I mean, I was doing it for you, Master. I wanted to please you, Master. But I really wanted to do it, and I really liked doing it. And I'd never gone that far before."

I was enjoying her talking about it almost as much as I enjoyed her doing it. She amused the hell out of me. "What do you mean? How far did you go?"

"Well, um..." She hesitated again before she continued, "It was always just foreplay before. I'd do it to get him... ready. Then he'd fuck me."

"Fuck you where, princess?" I asked. I just wanted to hear her say it. Happily, there was another red light ahead, so I could take the time to look at her again. This intersection wasn't as brightly lit as the last one, but I could still see her clearly.

She looked confused, which amused me even more. "I, uh... I'm not sure what you're asking, Master? Usually in bed. Sometimes..."

My laughter interrupted her, and she blushed even more. "No, princess... that's not what I mean. I mean what part of your body did he fuck?"

She looked even more confused, which made me laugh more, which made her look more embarrassed. My God, she was killing me. "My pussy? Is that what you want to hear me say, Master? My pussy? He fucked my pussy? How many parts of my body could he fuck? What else would he fuck if not my pussy?"

I ignored her question since she wasn't being sarcastic or disrespectful. She was serious. Sweet naive girl, she'd find out soon enough. "So, let me get this straight," I said. "I may not be your first blow job, but I am the first man to fuck your mouth. And you liked it. And I may not be the first one to fuck your pussy, but I'm going to be the first one to make you come while I do it. And I'm going to be the first one to fuck your ass."

Her eyes were wide as saucers. "My ass?" Her shock amused me even more.

"Yes, princess. Your ass. Not tonight, but soon. We have to prepare you first. You liked it when I stuck my finger in your asshole earlier today, didn't you?"

"Umm, yes, Master, but your finger is a lot smaller than... How will you...? Oh my God!" She continued to stare at me in shock. When the light turned green, I leaned over and gave her lips a quick kiss before I began to drive again.

"Why did you like it?" I asked as I glanced at her, and I was sure she was blushing again, even though the car was too dark to see her well.

"Um... I don't know, Master," she replied. "I'd never... felt anything like that before. I didn't expect it to feel good. But it did. Really good."

I held up my pinky finger in front of her. "We started with this. We'll continue with more of my fingers. Then, we'll move up to butt plugs. We'll begin with a small one for your tiny little asshole. You'll wear it there for as long as I say. When you get used to that, we'll move on to larger ones. It will probably take a couple of weeks. I won't fuck your ass until you're ready for it. I don't want to hurt you."

Anastasia didn't speak, but I could feel her staring at me. I knew I had shocked her, but I also knew she was going to enjoy being ass fucked. "You're going to love it, princess, I promise. The orgasms you've had so far are nothing compared to the ones you'll have when I ass fuck you. Multiple orgasms. That's what you want, isn't it?"

Anastasia replied, "If that's what you want, Master." All this time, she had been gently rubbing my cock. I put my hand over hers and pressed, forcing her to rub me harder.

"Good answer, princess," I responded. "And it is what I want. But right now, I just want to feel your hand on my cock. Keep rubbing me, just like that." I wasn't going to let her make me come. I actually liked the idea of arriving at the party in full Dom gear with a raging hard-on. It was hot.

When we stopped at another red light, I let go of Ana's hand, left her to continue to rub me, and cupped her face in my hands. "Do you have any idea how perfect you are?" I asked her before I kissed her hard and sucked on her bottom lip. She kissed me back as she rubbed me harder. Only the sound of a car horn honking behind us made us break away. We were both panting hard. Ana kept her hand on my cock, but she stopped rubbing. As I drove, I put my hand over hers and said, "I told you to keep rubbing me, Ana. When I tell you to keep doing something, don't stop until I tell you to stop." Immediately, she began to rub my cock again, and I questioned my sanity. How was I going to make it to the party without fucking her in the car first?

A couple of minutes later, we arrived in front of the mansion, and I was getting close to blowing my load. "We're here, Ana," I said. "You can stop touching me now." Immediately, she took her hand away.

I stepped out of the car, handed my key to the valet, and reached for Ana. She took my hand and crawled out. I held tightly to her hand as we walked to the door. Inside, we were greeted by a security team in the reception area, where we were asked to show our IDs and medical forms, which I had for both of us. I paid the $1,000 entrance fee for each of us. I only attend play parties with hefty entrance fees that are donated to charity. It insures that only people in my station of life, who care as much about discretion as I do, attend the same party. I also paid in advance for Kate Kavanagh after insuring that she hadn't already arrived.

We also needed to check Ana's coat, which I enjoyed taking off her. I took my time unbuttoning it, and then slipped it off her shoulders, revealing her delectable body that was barely covered in the dress. I knew she wanted to check herself, to make sure her nipples and ass were covered, but she stood there motionless and silent, with her head bowed, letting me gaze at her and touch her. I ran my fingers through her hair, and then down the straps of her dress over her nipples, which were already erect. Then I smoothed my hands over her ass before I gave her a good slap on the ass.

"You'll do," I said, with a smirk. "Now Ana, bend over and unbuckle your shoes. At this event, submissives are barefoot, so we're going to check your shoes with your coat." As she obeyed, I stood behind her so I could get a great view of her ass. She was already wet and I could see her pussy lips glistening as she leaned over and removed her shoes. Yes, baby!

She handed me her shoes, which I checked in with her coat and my jacket. Then I reached into the black bag, which I had brought with us, and I took out some leather cuffs. "Ana, I'm going to cuff your hands behind your back. That's so you will be totally dependent on me. Do you trust me, Ana?"

I was expecting some resistance, but she actually looked excited. "Yes, Master," she replied. "I trust you."

"What are your safe words, Ana?" I asked.

"Red for stop, yellow for slow down," she answered.

"Remember, Ana, you have to let me know if anything is too much. You have to use your safe words. I won't give you another warning once we get inside. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master," she responded. "I promise to use my safe words if I need to. I won't forget."

I cuffed her hands behind her. I knew that she wanted to cover herself because her breasts were so exposed, so by cuffing her hands behind her back, I prevented that. Now I had a clear view of her perfect tits, and I couldn't wait to move those straps and uncover her nipples. But all in good time.

As we entered the room, the party was already in full swing. I had decided that we would begin by eating dinner since I knew Ana hadn't eaten since our lunch, and I'm sure she was just as hungry as I was. So I steered her away from the formal living area, where some people had already begun to play, and into the dining area, where a massive buffet had been set up. I grabbed a plate and began to pile food on it for both of us. As I did, I asked Ana, "Do you have any food allergies or any other dietary needs I should know about?"

"No, Master," she responded. "I'll eat anything."

I smiled at the thought as I was reminded of her dream in the car.

I took Ana and our food into the living room, where I sat down on one of the sofas after placing our food on the coffee table, and helped Ana kneel in front of me. Now that she was barefoot, she was able to kneel and stand more easily, but with her hands cuffed behind her, and her lack of experience as a sub, I thought she might have difficulty. I smiled at her as I picked up my fork and started feeding her. She glanced at my erection as she chewed the food, making me get even harder. For a couple of minutes, I fed myself and Ana, and we didn't speak. A topless house submissive who was serving drinks brought us water bottles, and Ana stared at her nipple clamps in interest. I knew she wanted to ask questions about them, but I didn't prompt her, and she didn't speak. All in good time, baby. I lifted the water to Ana's lips and made her drink from it, and then I drank from the same bottle.

I kept feeding Ana and myself without speaking, just watching Ana take in everything that she could see going on around us. On our left, a Dom was eating a sandwich while his sub was sucking him off. I could see the shock on Ana's face, and I almost laughed at her. On the other side, a Dominatrix was being fed dinner by her sub, and Ana was interested in the way the woman stroked her sub's bare chest as he flawlessly lifted the fork to her mouth. I wondered if Ana would enjoy feeding me while I played with her tits. I hoped she wasn't thinking about rubbing my chest like the Dominatrix was rubbing her sub's. That would never happen.

When we were about half way through the plate of food, I started explaining some details of the play party to Ana. "The owner of this house, Chad, is a friend of my brother. He hosts this party a couple of times a month, and Elliot usually attends. Elliot is an architect, and he designed Chad's basement. It's the most elaborate BDSM dungeon I've ever seen. We'll go down and look at it later. The equipment that you see in here isn't usually here, but Chad has it moved in here for the party so that everyone doesn't have to crowd into the basement. But there are larger pieces of equipment down there. Upstairs, there are bedrooms that he lets people use for private play.

"Christian! You came!" I heard Elliot's voice before I saw him, mainly because I couldn't take my eyes off Ana. I glanced up as he plopped down on the floor next to Ana. His eyes widened as he got a good look at her.

I smirked as I introduced them. "Elliot, this is Anastasia. Ana, this is my brother Elliot."

Ana looked at Elliot curiously. He was wearing black leather pants similar to mine and just as tight, and no shirt or shoes. Elliot worked out just as religiously as I did, and his body showed it. I wondered if Ana felt attracted to him, and I felt a sting of jealousy. What was that? I had never felt jealous of a sub before. In the past, I had even shared other subs with Elliot, back when he was new to the lifestyle and didn't realize yet that he was a natural submissive. I had realized it about him before he did about himself. In fact, he had been so afraid to tell me that he had continued to play publicly as a Dom even after he had been subbing in private for a couple of months. I finally called him on it, and he came clean. He thought I would think he was less of a man for being a submissive, but that couldn't have been further from the truth.

"You're a submissive," Ana said with surprise in her voice. Then she looked at me and asked, "Am I allowed to talk to him, Master? I'm sorry, I should have asked you first."

Elliot looked like he was about to lose his shit. His eyes were as wide as saucers. "Holy shit, Christian! You've got Anastasia Steele wearing your collar, wearing cuffs, and calling you 'Master'? When the hell did this happen? I mean, I saw your pictures online, but I had no idea..."

"Elliot, shut the fuck up!" I commanded in a tone barely louder than a whisper, but I had intimidated some of the most powerful businessmen on earth with that tone. "You know we don't use last names here. She's already nervous enough about being recognized and publicly exposed." I looked back at Ana and stroked her hair possessively as I answered, "Yes, princess, you're allowed to talk freely with Elliot. The only people I don't want you talking to are other male Dominants."

"OK, thank you, Master," she responded. She turned back to Elliot and said, "You've done some work for me, but we've never had the pleasure of meeting in person. My assistant Hannah handled all the details. Anyway, it's nice to meet you, Elliot. I guess I was surprised that you're a submissive because of how Hannah described you. And when Christian described you earlier, I got the impression that you were a Dominant too."

I laughed and asked her, "Why, Ana? Because I told you he likes to come to these events unattached and play with as many women as possible?"

"Well, yes, Master," she replied with an embarrassed blush. God, she was cute! "I just assumed..." her voice trailed off.

"You have a lot to learn about this lifestyle, Anastasia. Don't make any assumptions about anything," I warned her.

"Yes, Master," she responded, looking down. "You're right."

"I have a confession to make," Elliot said. He was having nearly as much trouble keeping his eyes off Ana's body as I was, and I didn't like the look of lust in his eyes. What the fuck, Lelliot? He's a submissive, not to mention my brother and one of the few people I consider a friend, so he should be one of few men I could trust around Ana. But I was rethinking that because of the way he was looking at her.

When Elliot didn't speak again but continued looking at Ana, she looked confused and asked, "What confession, Elliot?"

Elliot actually blushed before he responded, "Well... you aren't the only one who made an assumption. I had a bit of a... crush on you. I just assumed... you seemed so much like Christian... at least your public image did. I assumed you must be a Dom. I've fantasized about you..."

"OK, enough," I interrupted as Ana blushed deeply and looked at me uncomfortably. "Ana's a sub, Elliot. I don't want to hear about your fucking fantasies. I especially don't want her to hear about them either. She's not just a sub, Elliot; she's MY sub. MINE! Do you understand?"

"Got it, bro," Elliot responded sheepishly. "Loud and clear." He paused for a moment before he asked me, "So... when you said there was somebody you wanted me to meet, were you talking about Ana? Because I thought... It seemed like you were implying... I didn't know you meant somebody you were with. I thought you were setting me up with a hot Dominatrix." Elliot looked disappointed, and I was glad that he avoided looking at Ana again.

"Relax, bro," I replied with a smirk. "And be patient. She's not here yet."

Ana looked up at me and made eye contact. "Kate?" she whispered, giving me a knowing look. When I nodded, she smiled. I knew then that I had made the right call in inviting Kate, who seemed to have perfect timing as she walked through the door at just that moment.

"Speak of the devil," I said. "Here she is now."

Elliot's jaw dropped when he looked across the room and saw the woman I pointed towards. Kate was dressed to kill. She wore a tight red leather skirt that barely covered her ass, and a red leather corset that pushed up her tits, making them seem bigger than they really were, and they were spilling out. She was hot. Not my type, and nowhere near as beautiful as my Ana, but hot as hell nonetheless. Elliot was already drooling as he gazed at her. She walked confidently towards us and had clearly noticed Elliot gaping at her. Her eyes locked with his, and she smiled seductively. Elliot was a goner. Even before she reached us, he shifted onto his knees and assumed a perfect submissive pose.

"Christian," Kate greeted me as she sat down next to me on the couch, leaned over and kissed my cheek. She glanced at Elliot again, who had his eyes downcast, and her smirk grew wider. Then she got a good look at Ana and sucked in her breath. "Holy shit, Steele! You look sexy as fuck! Good God, Christian, I never expected you'd even get her to even come, much less show so much skin. How the hell did you...? Wow!"

I smirked at her and returned my gaze to my beautiful girl. "Simple, Kate. I sent her the dress, told her to wear it, and she did. She's a natural submissive."

Ana's blush made me want to do things to her. I wasn't sure how much longer I could wait. "So, you like it?" Ana asked Kate.

Kate smirked and answered, "I'm not the Dom who matters right now. But yes, I like it. How about me? How do I look?"

"Hot as hell, as you already know," Ana replied with a cute little smirk.

Kate smiled proudly at Ana, glanced at Elliot again, and then told Ana, "You realize tonight was the first time I ever had to get ready without you? Do you know how hard it was to lace up this corset without your help?" Kate could not stop glancing at Elliot, who had been trying very hard to keep his submissive pose with his head down and not to look at her, but he couldn't help looking at her breasts a few times. Kate looked back at me and purposefully ignored Elliot, giving him the opportunity to look at her breasts again. She explained to me, "When Ana and I were roommates, she used to always help me get dressed when I went to play parties. I always tried to get her to come too, but she never would. When she moved into her place, I kept the tradition going. Today's the first time since she moved into her penthouse that I didn't get ready at her place. I love her bathroom, especially her dressing room with the three-way mirrors."

"Is that right?" I responded, thinking of all kinds of uses for those three-way mirrors. I couldn't wait to get Ana naked in front of them.

As if she could read my mind, Ana blushed again as she looked at me. She gave me a shy smile before she looked at Kate and responded, "Next time we do this, we'll have to get ready together, like old times."

Kate laughed and teased her. "Except next time, you'll be getting ready too... to go out with your hot Dom. It's about time, sweetie. You deserve to be happy."

The topless server walked by again, carrying cold water bottles on a tray. Elliot reached up and grabbed one. He held it out in both hands towards Kate as he knelt in front of her. Kate took her time really looking at him this time. She licked her lips as she openly checked him out. He kept his eyes on the water bottle in his hands.

I had been messing with Elliot by putting off introducing them. Finally, I decided to put him out of his misery. "Kate, the sub in front of you is my brother, Elliot. He is the person I mentioned to you yesterday. Elliot, this is Ana's friend Kate."

"That's Mistress to you, little sub," Kate said flirtatiously to Elliot, as she took the water bottle from his hands, opened it, and took a long drink.

I laughed at her. "Little sub?" I asked. "Elliot's hardly little. He probably bench presses three times your weight on a daily basis."

"Is that right?" Kate responded, not taking her eyes off Elliot. She licked her lips again as she looked down at his erect cock. "How would you like to bench press me, little sub?" she asked him.

Elliot smiled as he responded, "If that would please you, Mistress."

"It would please me to tie you to that spanking bench over there, watch your ass turn red under my hand, and then press your cock between my lips and suck you off until you beg me to let you come. But I won't let you come, little sub, not in my mouth. Not tonight anyway. No, I won't allow you to come until you're buried inside me. It would please me to ride you hard until you come like there's no tomorrow. Would you like that, little sub?"

For a moment, I wasn't sure Elliot was breathing. Ana's eyes were wider than I had seen them, even when I had shocked her earlier. Apparently she had never seen Kate in full-out Dominatrix mode. Kate kept her eyes on Elliot, waiting for him to respond to her question.

At last, Elliot found his voice, but it still faltered as he answered, "Yes, Mistress. I would like that... a lot."

I now had a decision to make. Ana hadn't yet said those magic words that I was waiting for, so we could either stay where we were and watch Kate and Elliot play, or I could show her around, maybe down to the dungeon where I knew the play was much more intense than what she was seeing around us at the moment. Up to now, I had expected that Kate and Elliot would hit it off just as they had, and I had expected that Ana and I would watch them play. But now that the moment had arrived, I wasn't feeling as comfortable with it as I had thought I would, and I wasn't sure why. Just the thought of Ana seeing my brother's cock made me feel uncomfortable, but why? I had never had issues with other subs seeing my brother naked. We often played at the same parties, and we had even shared subs in the past. At the moment, there were people fucking all around us, and I realized that I didn't like the fact that Ana was watching other naked Doms. And I especially didn't like that they were watching her, and we weren't even playing yet. But she looked so damn hot in that barely there dress. There were plenty of eyes lusting after her, and I didn't like it. But why? I'd never felt jealous of a sub before. Why now? Why was Ana so different? I decided to ignore my weird feelings and let Ana watch, at least for a few minutes, even though it meant she would see my brother naked. This is what she wanted, to really experience a play party, and now that I had her here, I wasn't going to take any of it away from her. And I could see how aroused she already was.

Kate reached into her toy bag, got out a package of antiseptic wipes, and handed them to Elliot. "Go, prepare the spanking bench, little sub," she ordered him. When Elliot walked away, Kate took a flogger and a riding crop out of her toy bag and showed them to Ana. "Which would you rather watch, Ana?" she asked her.

Ana looked shocked. "You want me to choose?" she asked, with an audible gulp.

Kate smiled and nodded. "This is what you've been curious about all these years, and now you're here. Which one?" When Ana didn't respond immediately, Kate continued, "Come on, Ana, you've seen the videos. You know what both of these are and how they're used. And what I'm going to do will be erotic, not punishment. I'm going to drive him wild. So which one would you rather see?"

Ana looked at me, as if for approval. I couldn't have been happier, not only with how turned on she was but also with her need for my approval. "Which one, princess? You won't get to choose again, so make the most of it."

Ana looked back at the crop and flogger that Kate had placed on the couch between us. "The flogger," she said to Kate, and then looked at me again for approval.

"Good choice, princess. You're going to enjoy this," I told her.


	11. Chapter 11: Play Party, Part 2 (CPOV)

**Chapter 11: The Play Party, Part 2** _(Christian's POV)_

Kate took the flogger and walked over to Elliot, who had finished cleaning the spanking bench and was waiting for her there. I knew they would talk a few minutes about limits before they got started, so I took advantage of that time to talk to Ana. I wanted to find out how much I could get away with before she asked me to play. Once again deciding to ignore my weird feelings that made me want to hide Ana from everyone else's view, I determined to push her as far as I could, to find out where her limits were. I wanted to get her naked, preferably for my eyes only, but I knew she wanted the full experience of a play party, so I would go along with it. It helped me to remember that everyone there knew she was mine. Nobody was going to touch her or even talk to her without my permission. I told Ana to look at me, and I put my hands on both of her shoulders and massaged them. I watched her face closely as I spoke. "Ana, I'm going to play with your tits while we watch Kate and Elliot. It would please me to move the straps out of the way so I have better access. I asked you at home if exposing yourself was a limit, and you weren't sure. Now that you're here, is that a hard limit?"

Ana struggled to maintain eye contact with me, and she trembled under my hands. Her lip quivered a little before she swallowed and answered, "No, Master."

"No?" I asked.

"No," she repeated, and she continued with a shaky voice. "I mean green. I mean... do whatever pleases you, Master."

At that moment, it pleased me to kiss the shit out of her lips. I held her face in my hands as I poured everything I was feeling into the kiss. So much of it I didn't understand, but I just went with it. I didn't allow the part of my brain that would have reminded me that I don't kiss my subs on the lips to take over. Instead, I focused on how good, how right, it felt to kiss her. As I deepened the kiss, I pulled her towards me until she was straddling me on the couch. I cupped her ass in my hands and squeezed. Then I moved my hands up her back, ignoring her hands that were cuffed there, and moved up to her shoulders. When I reached the straps on her shoulders, I slipped them off, and then I moved my hands down to her breasts, which were now bare. When my fingers found her nipples, she gasped into my mouth, and I further deepened the kiss as I tweaked her nipples. I fucked her mouth with my tongue. My erection was pressed into her core, and I wanted nothing more than to be buried balls deep in her sweet pussy.

Against my own desire, I ended the kiss and pulled her far enough away from me that I could see her face. She looked dazed, and she was panting for air. Her lips were red and swollen, and oh so beautiful. I could hardly wait to fuck that perfect mouth again. I looked down at her tits, with her perky pink nipples that were begging me to suck them. I spread my knees, which forced her legs further apart, so I had a better view of her pussy. "You're dripping wet for me, aren't you, princess," I said.

"Yes, Master," she replied breathlessly.

I glanced over at Kate and Elliot. Elliot was stripped naked and leaning over the spanking bench. Kate was caressing his ass, but she seemed to be stalling. Waiting for Ana. Again, I contemplated letting others see what was mine, but it was do or die time, and I had brought her here for this purpose. I pushed Ana off my lap and said, "Stand there, turn around, and look at Kate. I'm going to uncuff you. I have plans for those hands."

Ana obeyed me without speaking. After I uncuffed her hands, I stood up and moved us closer to Kate and Elliot. When we were a few feet away, I stood behind Ana. I took her hands and lifted them to the back of my head as I spoke softly in her ear, "Now watch Kate. Don't take your eyes away from her or close them for any reason. Keep your hands locked behind my head, or you can put your fingers in my hair if you want to. And don't speak unless you need to use a safe word." Then I nibbled her ear. I didn't have to watch Kate to know when she began flogging Elliot because I could feel Ana's body react. I chose that moment to kiss her neck and rub her nipples. Ana gasped, but then she leaned her body against me and tilted her head to give me better access to her neck. She was silently begging for more. I pinched her nipples and licked her neck. She sighed and leaned against me even more when my hands left her breasts. She needn't have been concerned. I was simply reaching into my pocket to take out the nipple clamps that I had placed there earlier. I reached around her and pinched her nipples again at the same time that Elliot cried out ecstatically.

A moment later, Ana gasped when she felt the first nipple clamp. "Wha..." she began to speak." She glanced down at her breast.

"Shh," I said in her ear. I nibbled her ear and caressed the breast that I hadn't clamped yet. Then I spoke in her ear again, "I'm going to punish you for that, princess. I told you not to look away from Kate for any reason, and not to speak. You disobeyed me." I pinched her nipple hard and then clamped it too.

"Aaaa," she cried out. "I'm sorry, Master," she said.

"Shhh. Silence. Keep watching Kate. She's almost done. When she throws down the flogger, I want you to lower your hands from my head, reach behind you and take out my cock. When she puts her mouth around Elliot's cock, I want your hands to be around my cock." I pulled on the nipple clamps, earning another gasp from her.

A moment later, Kate threw down the flogger. As she instructed Elliot to get up and turn around, Ana lowered her arms, reached behind her, unsnapped my pants, and lowered the zipper. I felt like I was going to explode, and I had to look at Elliot's ugly red cock to get myself under control. As Kate strapped Elliot's arms and feet to the bench, Ana pulled my cock out and started rubbing. I moved her hair out of my way and started kissing and licking the other side of her neck as I continued to tug on the nipple clamps.

When Kate knelt in front of Elliot and started sucking him off, I spoke in Ana's ear, "Spread your legs wider, princess." She obeyed without slowing down on my hand-job or taking her eyes off Kate. I reached down and squeezed her ass hard before I inserted two fingers into her tight, wet core. She whimpered, but when I began to pump my fingers, she rode them and rubbed my cock harder.

I had to look back at Elliot again to avoid coming. Kate spit his cock out and climbed onto him. After she rolled a condom over him, she sank down, taking all of him in one move. She spoke to him, and even though I couldn't hear them, I guessed that she was instructing him to look at her. His eyes didn't leave her face as she began to ride him and rub her nipples. That was hot.

I added one finger and continued pumping Ana's tight cunt as we watched Kate riding Elliot. "Don't you dare come," I said in her ear before I sucked her earlobe into my mouth and bit it. I could feel her orgasm building and knew that she would not have the ability to stop it, but I had no intention of letting her come until she said the magic words.

"Master... please," Ana gasped.

"Silence," I responded. "Every time you speak, it gives me another reason to punish you. Hold it back, Ana. DO NOT COME."

"Yes, please," Ana responded as she stopped rubbing me but kept her hands on my cock and squeezed it hard. "I want it... Christian!" Her eyes were wide as she looked away from Kate and into my eyes. She rolled her eyes dramatically. "Yes, Christian, I said it. I'm such a bad girl. I'm breaking so many rules. Please... I need you to punish me! Please punish me, Master."

I chuckled as I removed my hands from her and stepped back, looking in her eyes. In front of us, Kate and Elliot reached their climax together, but our attention wasn't on them any more. "You think I'm going to let you come now," I said. "That's why you agreed to let me punish you. I have news for you, princess. It's going to be a while before you get to come, if I let you come at all. You don't deserve to, after that. Your instructions were to say four words. Four simple fucking words. But before you could say those words, you just had to defy me, didn't you? You used my name deliberately, twice. You rolled your eyes deliberately too. You were trying to provoke me. Now, you're going to pay. We're going to the dungeon. Don't say a word... not to me, not to anyone. Your only task now is to obey my instructions, without hesitation. I don't want to hear a peep from you, unless it's a safe word. If you understand, nod your head."

I wasn't angry, but she easily could have interpreted it that I was. I didn't care. She had deliberately disobeyed me and provoked me for one single purpose: to make sure that I took her seriously when she said she wanted me to punish her. She needn't have worried that I would take her seriously. I had been waiting for those four words all evening, and I knew they would come eventually. But now, she had given me more reasons to test her limits, and I was going to enjoy every minute of it.

I glanced at Elliot, who was enjoying aftercare from Kate. I smiled to myself to see how wrapped up they were in each other. For the first time since I had first started attending play parties with him, Elliot wouldn't be looking at any other women tonight. I turned away from them without a second glance and took Ana's hand. Without speaking to her, I led her to the stairs to the basement. I led the way down the stairs without letting go of her hand, and moving so quickly that she had to hold on to the handrail to keep from falling. No way would I let her fall, but she didn't know that yet.

I stopped at the bottom of the stairs to let Ana's eyes adjust to the dimmer light... and to take in all of the erotic images all around us. The first scene that she noticed was a female submissive who was spread eagle on a bed, her wrists and ankles cuffed and chained to the four bed posts. She had recently been whipped, and now her two Doms were busy fucking her, one her pussy and the other her mouth. For a moment, I stood with Ana, letting her watch, taking delight in her arousal.

Then I led Ana to the next scene, which was two gay men. The sub was bound facedown to a St. Andrews Cross while his Dom was caning him. Ana only watched them for a moment before her eyes were drawn to another St. Andrews Cross not far from that one. A female sub was bound face up, and another sub was licking her cunt while their Dom was flogging both of them.

Ana didn't seem very interested in either of those scenes, but she stopped and watched the next one, where a female submissive was bent over a spanking bench. Her Dom stood behind her, and another female submissive stood in front of her. The Dom rotated between spanking her with a paddle and fucking her. He would hit her four times with the paddle, then fuck her hard for a minute, then pull out and hit her four more times with the paddle, and so on. Meanwhile, the sub he was beating and fucking was licking the tits of the other sub. As we watched, the Dom pulled his cock out of the sub he was fucking, dropped the paddle, and walked around to where the other sub stood. He spoke to her briefly, and she walked around and knelt behind the bound sub. As the Dom began to fuck her mouth, the other sub licked her pussy.

I was so turned on, and I knew Ana was too. I pulled her towards me, pressed my cock between the cheeks of her ass, and tugged on the nipple clamps as we watched the Dom come in his sub's mouth before he allowed her to come. He ordered the sub who was eating her out not to stop, and within a minute, the bound sub was crying out with her second orgasm. But he still wasn't done. He ordered the kneeling sub to return to the head of the bound sub and stand in front of her so that the bound sub could eat her pussy while he fucked her ass. As we watched this, I ordered Ana to spread her legs. I reached one hand in front and rubbed her clit, and the other hand behind her. I inserted two fingers into her core and pumped her a few times before I withdrew them and spread her juices over her rear entrance. Slowly, I inserted my index finger, first to the knuckle, and little by little the rest of the way. When my finger was all the way in, I spoke in her ear as I began to pump her, "If you come, I'm going to double the number of lashes I planned to give you. Trust me, princess, you don't want that." I paused a moment to let that sink in, taking a moment to lick behind her ear and suck on her earlobe as I continued to rub her clit with one hand and pump her ass with the other hand.

Ana held her breath as the sub who was getting eaten out and ass-fucked cried out as she came, and her Dom held her in place and forced her to ride out the orgasm. "Yellow!" Ana whispered urgently as I was continuing to rub her clit and finger fuck her ass.

"What is it, princess?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

"I can't hold it back any longer, Master. I have to come."

Immediately I took my hands away from her and led her towards a corner that was not in use. "Not yet, my princess," I said. "Not until I say so. Now, it's time for you to get rid of that skirt. Take it off now." Ana obeyed without hesitation. Now she stood in front of me totally naked in a room full of other naked or semi-naked people. I forced myself to keep my attention only on her and to forget that there were others in the room who may be ogling my beautiful girl.

To our left, a female submissive who had just been flogged was crying out passionately as her Dom fucked her hard while shoving a vibrator up her ass. Ana could not avoid looking their way, and as she did, her nipples got even harder. "Attention on me now, princess," I ordered, as I tugged at her nipple clamps. "I want you to ignore everything happening around us. The only voice I want you to respond to is mine. The only face I want you to see is mine. The only cock I want you to look at is mine. You want my cock, don't you, princess? If you're a good girl and take your punishment well, I might give it to you. Now, give me your wrists." She immediately held out her wrists, which I cuffed. "Hands up," I commanded, and she reached her arms over her head. I attached the cuffs to a chain that was hanging from the ceiling, and then I adjusted the chain so that Ana had to stand on her tiptoes.

I reached into my toy bag and took out a riding crop and a flogger. Ana sucked in her breath as she looked at both of them with wide eyes. I walked around her, taking first the flogger and trailing it lightly over her skin, over her breasts, back, stomach, ass, and so on, as I spoke. "I find it interesting that you chose the flogger for Elliot, not the riding crop. You had no way of knowing how much Elliot enjoys being flogged, especially if it's for pleasure, not punishment, but he likes to be punished too. Floggings can be very sensual. But they can also be very painful. Or they can be both. You'll find out soon enough. But not tonight. Tonight, you're going to be introduced to the riding crop."

Ana stifled a whimper as I put the flogger away and held the riding crop in front of her. With the tip of the crop, I circled her breasts, tweaking her clamped nipples. Then I moved it downward, dragging it over her abdomen, down to her pussy lips, over her clit, into her vagina. She gasped, and immediately I withdrew the crop from her pussy and held it to her lips. "Open your mouth," I ordered. She obeyed, and I said, "See how good you taste, pet? Suck it. Suck it as if it's my cock." Ana locked her eyes with mine and sucked on the tip of the riding crop as if her life depended on it. "You want to suck my cock again, don't you baby? I know you do. Be a good girl, and I'll reward you." I unzipped my pants and released my cock again, stroking it a few times as she watched me.

I took a step back and walked around her again, taking note of her heavy breathing and trembling body. I knew she felt afraid, but I suspected that she was more excited and nervous than truly afraid. With my foot, I nudged her feet further apart and noted that her juices were dripping down her legs. I knelt behind her and licked up her inner thigh towards her pussy, lapping up her juices, and causing more to gush out. I couldn't get enough of her. I lifted her leg, placed it on my shoulder, and buried my head in her pussy, lapping up her sweet nectar with my tongue. But I didn't let her get close to orgasm this time. Instead, I quickly stood up and circled her again, making sure she saw the riding crop in my hand. Without warning, I struck her ass, and just as quickly struck her again just above the first strike. I paused a moment, assessing her reaction. She whimpered softly, but she didn't use a safe word. I struck the backs of her thighs a few times, harder than my first two strikes, and still she was quiet. Her eyes were screwed shut, and her body was still trembling, but she didn't speak. I struck her ass again a couple of times, hard. I sensed that she would use a safe word if I struck her any harder. I began to rain down strikes, never harder than those last strikes had been, but so quickly that she had little time to recover between blows. I continued to circle her body, striking her as I went. I watched in delight as her flawless skin turned a beautiful shade of pink, and I kept striking, hard but not too hard. I wanted to make sure she knew this was punishment, not pleasure, but I didn't want to freak her out with too much pain. She kept her eyes screwed shut the entire time, and I saw tears on her face, but still she didn't use a safe word. She cried out for the first time when I struck her breast, tweaking the nipple hard enough to knock off the nipple clamp. She cried out a second time when I repeated my action on her other breast.

By this time, I had given her more than the twenty lashes that I had planned on, and I decided that it was enough. I dropped the crop and sucked her nipple to ease the pain. After a minute, I repeated this action on her other nipple. As I sucked her tit, I put my hand in her pussy again to see how wet she was, and was surprised to find her even wetter than before, if that were possible.

"You've pleased me, princess," I told her as I reached into my rear pocket and took out a condom. As I rolled it over my cock, I told her, "They require condoms here, but when I fuck you in my playroom, I want to do it bare, since I know you have reliable birth control. I can show you my health records to prove I'm clean... later. But right now, I'm going to fuck you. Lift your legs and put them around me."

As she obeyed, I supported her ass and pulled her towards me. She moaned as I sank into her in one quick motion. I almost came on the spot. My God, she felt so tight, and so good. I didn't remember a time when fucking ever felt this perfect. Ana was perfect.

After I gave her a few seconds to adjust to the feel of my huge cock inside her, I began to move. As I pumped her, I said, "You've pleased me tonight, princess, so I'm going to let you come. You have my permission to come as many times as you need to. I want you to keep count. You have permission to speak only if you're counting your orgasms or using a safe word."

Almost immediately, she responded with "One," and as her tight little cunt clinched around my dick, I came undone. I literally saw stars, and I couldn't stop the cry from my lips. There's no way I could hold it back, and I came gloriously inside her. It had to have been one of the strongest orgasms I'd ever had. It went on and on, and I never wanted it to end. When it finally did, I didn't want to pull out of her. I stood there, holding her, my arms wrapped tightly around her.

After a few minutes of standing there, holding my girl, I became aware of our surroundings again. Some of the scenes were the same people as before in new positions, and others had new people just beginning to play. Across from us, a bed had just been vacated where a scene had ended, and a naked female house sub was changing the sheets to prepare it for the next scene. I'm sure it appeared to anyone watching us that I was giving my sub aftercare. The truth was that I needed to hold her as much as she needed me to do it.

But I was a Dom, goddamn it, and I couldn't appear weak. So I pulled out of Ana, released her arms, removed the cuffs, and led her over to the bed with clean sheets. "Lie down. Face up, and spread eagle," I ordered her. She obeyed without hesitation. I cuffed her wrists and ankles to the chains attached to the bed and adjusted them so she couldn't move. As I cuffed her, I spoke, "I'm going to punish you again, princess. You broke another rule. You forgot to look me in the eyes when you came. You won't forget again, will you, sub?"

"No, Master," she responded.

I smiled and said, "After this, you won't forget." I reached in my bag and quickly found all the toys I was looking for. I held one up and told Ana, "This is a butt plug. It's the smallest one on the market that vibrates. I'm going to insert it now." Ana watched me with wide eyes as I generously rubbed lube all over the butt plug, and she held her breath until the butt plug was fully in her anus. She whimpered a little but didn't speak. I wasn't ready yet to make it vibrate, but I could hardly wait to see how it affected her.

Ana watched me as I held up the next toy. "This is a vibrating egg," was all I told her before I inserted it in her already well lubricated pussy. While I was there, I couldn't stop myself from giving her a good lick. God, she tasted good. I'd never get my fill of her. But I knew I was going to get a better taste of her soon, so I stood up and picked up another toy. "This is a vibrating wand," I told her. "Now, Ana, next time we do this, I'll blindfold you. But this time, you're being punished for failing to look at me when you come, so you will keep your eyes on mine the whole time, if you can see them. If I'm going down on you, if you can't see my face, you have permission to come without looking in my eyes. Otherwise, you must look at me. You also have permission to scream. In fact, I want to hear you scream. But the only words I want to hear from you are numbers. And don't forget your safe words. You've had one orgasm so far, so you'll begin now from two. Nod at me if you understand."

When Ana nodded at me in affirmation, I turned on the vibrators on low speed. The one in her pussy jumped to life first, followed by the one up her ass. She moaned loudly. When I touched the vibrating wand to her clit, she cried out, "Two! Master!" I held the wand to her clit as she rode though the waves of the orgasm, her eyes locked with mine the whole time. As that orgasm ended, I kept playing with her clit with the wand, leaned over her and licked her nipples, one by one. I didn't suck or bite them but licked playfully. Within a minute, she cried out again, "Three, Master! Oh God!"

With my free hand, I rubbed her nipple through her orgasm as I looked in her eyes and said, "I'm just your Master, not your God." She didn't take her eyes from me as she wound down from the orgasm.

I didn't give her time to recover from that orgasm before I gave her two more using the wand to stimulate her nipples. Through both of them, Ana kept her eyes glued to mine, and they were becoming more and more glassy. She didn't fail to cry out the number. When she cried out with the fourth one, her scream could be heard throughout the dungeon. From the corner of my eye, I got a glimpse of Kate and Elliot watching us. I was glad Ana wasn't aware of their presence as I knew she would feel self conscious.

When I was sure that the fourth orgasm had passed, I got up off the bed and returned the vibrating wand to my bag. We would not need it again tonight. I walked around to Ana's head, wondering if she would come again just from the toys that continued to vibrate in her ass and pussy. She was so responsive to them that I decided to wait before increasing the speed.

I knelt on the bed at Ana's head, with my knees on each side of her head. I leaned over her, positioned my cock over her face, and commanded her, "Suck me." When she latched on to me and started sucking obediently, I leaned down and licked her clit before sucking it into my mouth. Her juices were flowing, and I lapped them up. Very soon, she spit out my cock, cried out, "Five, Master!" and then latched onto my cock again, moaning as she rode through the orgasm. Her moaning on my cock undid me, and I came gloriously in her mouth. She sucked me dry before crying out with number six. Holy shit, could she give a blowjob! She was a master at it.

I wasn't happy about coming so soon. I had wanted to hold out longer, until she had come at least a couple more times through the sixty-nine. So I remained in the position and told her, "Keep sucking me until I get hard again. You can use your teeth, just don't bite hard." I followed that up by biting her clit the way I wanted her to bite me. When she did that, it didn't take long at all for me to get hard again. And yes, I did realize that I had never given a sub permission to bite me before, and that Ana was different in so many ways than any sub I'd ever had.

It was time to remove the vibrator from her cunt, even though I had not needed to increase the speed at all. But I decided to give her one last orgasm with it. I notched it up to the next speed, and within seconds, she screamed louder than she had so far. Her "seven, master" was barely coherent. Immediately, I removed the vibrator and tongue fucked her though the seventh orgasm. The seventh had barely ended before the eight one began, and I continued to tongue fuck her.

As her eighth orgasm ended, I looked up at Ana's face. It was covered with tears and sweat, and mascara was running down her cheeks. Her eyes were glazed over and her lips were swollen where she had most likely been biting them. And never had she looked more beautiful. I quickly got up and grabbed a condom, and she moaned again. At this point, only the butt vibrator remained in place, and I had not increased the speed. I wouldn't need to tonight.

As I got on top of her, I asked, "How many more do you think you have in you, sweet girl?"

Her eyes locked with mine as she came back from whatever sub-zone she had been in. "No, Master, please. No more. I can't," she begged.

"You can and you will," I responded. Without further ado, I plunged into her and began to fuck her, hard. Our eyes remained locked, and I felt myself falling deeper and deeper into their blue depths. I never wanted that moment to end. I could, in that moment, see myself with her five years from now, ten years from now. What would that mean for her? Would she want marriage? Would she want children? For the first time ever, those concepts didn't scare the hell out of me. They actually seemed... desirable. Holy shit! I wanted to grow old with her! Holy fuck! Flynn was right. I was falling in love with Anastasia Steele! But how could that be possible? Only after two days? And Christian fucking Grey couldn't fall in love, no matter how many days I was given.

As Ana cried out in her ninth orgasm, I wondered what was going through her mind as she gazed into mine. Was she feeling even half of what I was? Could she see into my soul as clearly as I felt she could? Could she possibly ever love me too? No, that would be too much to hope for. If she really saw into my soul, she'd know how dark it was, how rotten. No one could love a monster like me. But as I gazed at her, I imagined I saw it there. I imagined that she felt it too. In response, I pumped her even harder, causing her to try out in her tenth orgasm. And that was all it took for me to fall over the cliff with her. As we fell, I kissed her, pouring everything I was feeling into the kiss, imagining her returning everything I felt for her. I continued to kiss her long after the orgasm ended.

Only when I realized that Ana was still restrained did I get up and release her. I massaged her legs and arms, and then I got some arnica cream from my bag and rubbed it into her still pink skin on her ass and thighs. "Lie on your front," I ordered her, and she rolled over. I straddled her and massaged her shoulders and back. Then I ordered her to sit up. I made her drink some water, and then we lay down again, facing each other. I kissed her again, but very tenderly this time. I realized quickly that I was becoming addicted to her lips. I couldn't stop kissing her. But I also realized that a BDSM dungeon was not the place where I wanted to continue to kiss her for the rest of the night.

"Get up," I ordered her. She tried to obey me, but her legs were too weak to stand without my assistance. She reached out to grab my arm but caught herself before she did. Surprisingly, I didn't feel the usual fear. I actually wanted her to touch me. Perhaps it was because it was only my arm, not my chest.

"I'm sorry, Master," she said.

"No need to apologize, princess. It's OK to hold my arm." I held it out for her and she clung to it. As we left the room, I looked back at where I had seen Kate and Elliot earlier. I was shocked to see Kate fucking Elliot's ass with a strap-on. I knew it was one of his hard limits, so I couldn't imagine what had possessed him to allow her to do it. Even more surprisingly, he seemed to be enjoying it.

I didn't mention them to Ana, and I don't think she saw them. We made our way back up the stairs. Ana was still naked, but she seemed unaffected by her nudity. Perhaps it was because almost everyone in the room was also naked. In fact, I was the only person I saw around us that was wearing a shirt, and one of few men whose cocks were not hanging out.

By the time we made our way towards the exit, it was past 1 a.m., and I knew it would be close to 2:30 by the time we got home if we left now. I got our jackets and Ana's shoes. I instructed her first to sit down in an armchair, where I knelt in front of her and put her shoes on her. I wasn't ready to cover her gorgeous body yet. What's more, once her fuck-me stilettos were back on her feet, I wanted her again. I knew she was tired, but goddamn it, she was my sub and I wanted her. I pulled her over to the table where we had been checked in when we first arrived, and I instructed her to put her elbows on it and stick out her ass as far as she could. I stood behind her as I quickly got out my cock and rolled a condom over it, plunged into her still soaking wet pussy, and fucked her furiously. Her rosebud was swollen from the butt plug, and I pressed my finger against it gently. With my other hand, I reached around and pinched her nipple.

"Oh, my God!" she cried out as she turned her head and looked in my eyes. "Master! Master! How many? I don't know how many." She gazed into my eyes as her pussy clinched tightly around my cock.

I followed right behind her, and as I pumped my seed into her, I responded to her, "You lost count, princess? I should punish you for that." I managed to conceal my smile even though I was laughing triumphantly inside.

"Eleven!" she called out. "It was eleven, Master!" She paused a moment before muttering under her breath, "Holy shit!"

I smirked at her. "You think that sounds like a lot, princess?"

"Yes, Master," she replied with awe. "I've never... that's more orgasms than I've had all year.. and all within just a few hours."

"Did you enjoy them, princess?" I asked her teasingly even though I really wanted to know.

She looked surprised that I asked her, and she seemed to realize that I wasn't merely teasing her but really wanted an answer. "Umm... at first, yes, Master. But then... with the vibrators... they were too much. It was too... intense. It became... painful. I never thought I'd not want to have another orgasm, but tonight..."

"It was punishment," I interrupted. "You will remember to look at me when you come. Each time you forget, you'll get vibrators in your ass and cunt. And I left them on the lowest speed tonight. Next time, I'll speed them up, and it will be much more intense."

She looked shocked, and she swallowed before she responded, "Whatever pleases you, Master. But... there won't be a next time. I won't forget again."

"I'm glad to hear that, princess," I replied. "Now... let's go in the bathroom and clean up a little before we go. And... my goal was to give you an even dozen tonight, so I still owe you one."

Her eyes widened, but she followed me into the large bathroom in the foyer of the house. Unlike most powder rooms, this one had a large walk-in shower. I instructed Ana to take off her shoes and then to turn on the tap since she was already naked while I removed my clothes. I had not planned this, but now that we were here, I was determined to do it. Not only had I never showered with a sub before, but I also had never gotten naked with a sub. In fact, Ana would be the first one to ever see me without a shirt. Even though I believed that she would remember not to touch me, I still felt afraid. But I refused to let her see my fear.

"Face the wall," I ordered her as I got in behind her. "Put your hands on the wall and keep them there."

I stood behind Ana and pulled her hair over to one side while I kissed her neck on the other side. Then I filled my hand with shower gel and began to rub her body. When I began to move downward, I ordered her to put her foot up on the shower seat so I would have better access to her pussy. I cleaned her private areas thoroughly before I continued to move downward, lathering her legs.

When I was satisfied that she was clean, I sat down on the shower seat and pulled her towards me. "Remember, keep both hands flat on the wall," I reminded her. Then I leaned down and kissed her bare mound. She moaned when I continued to kiss her, using my tongue and lips to open her up. I bit her clit softly before thrusting my tongue into her. Once I began tongue fucking her, it only took a couple of minutes for her to fall over the edge for the twelfth time this evening, crying it out ecstatically. When I glanced up at her, her eyes were fixed on mine, and what I saw there amazed the hell out of me. She was looking at me in a heady mixture of adoration and awe. In that moment, I made it my goal in life to put that look on her face again as often as I could.

We left shortly after that, and it was after 3 a.m. when we arrived back at Escala. Ana was sound asleep, as she had been since shortly after we'd left. I had so many questions I wanted to ask her, but I knew they all could wait. I wondered what she had thought of her first play party.

Once we were back at Escala, I couldn't wake her enough to find out her elevator code, and I didn't want to anyway. When I picked her up out of the car, she opened her eyes for just a second, closed them again, snuggled up against me, and nuzzled my neck. If any other sub had done that, I would have come unglued. We would have gone straight to my playroom for punishment no matter how tired she was. But Ana wasn't any other sub, and I liked having her in my arms, snuggled against me. I certainly wasn't ready to part with her tonight, so I completely ignored the D tower and went directly to my elevator. I had never felt so happy, so alive, to carry a sleeping sub in my arms. I had certainly never felt happy about undressing a sub and putting her in my own bed, or in undressing myself and pressing my naked body against hers. I had never spooned with a sub. And I had most certainly never felt my chest constrict with... whatever it was I was feeling... as I drifted off to sleep with the pleasant scent of apples and vanilla filling my nostrils.

I realized a few other firsts as soon as I opened my eyes again. Soft sunlight fell through the windows, and I was tangled in my bed with a still sleeping perfect angel. I glanced at the clock on my bedside table. 11:54. It was almost noon. We had gone to bed around 3:30, so I had just slept eight hours straight without a single nightmare. That had never happened in my entire life. I couldn't remember a single time when I had ever slept without a nightmare.

It took me a minute to wake up enough to realize... Ana's head was resting on my bare chest. And one of her hands was directly on my bare chest. And I didn't feel any pain. No pain whatsoever, for the first time in my life. Even Mia couldn't touch me like this. As I watched in shock, Ana roused a little, and then she nuzzled my chest. She nuzzled my chest. With her lips. And it felt... amazing. Not only was there no pain, but there was... I wasn't sure what it was, but I liked it. I liked it a lot. It felt like... home.

And then, as if that wasn't enough, Ana began to speak in her sleep. "Christian," she mumbled. "Oh, Christian. I love you, Christian." I felt tears coming to my eyes as I continued to watch her in a mixture of awe, fear, and confusion. Could this be real? Could she really feel this way? Would she dream it if she didn't actually feel it?

"Christian..." she continued. "I'll always be yours."

"Anastasia, I'm yours too. Please, don't ever leave me," I whispered.

"OK," she answered. But was she answering me, or was she responding to something in her dream? Would she stay if she knew the real me? She already knew me better than anyone. Would she love me once she got to know me better? Could I keep the rotten parts of me hidden from her so she wouldn't leave me?

I sat up in the bed and just stared at her for I'm not sure how long. Could I love her? Would I destroy her? Could I trust myself enough to try for something more with her? Could I trust her enough to stay with me in spite of my darkness? I wasn't sure about anything except for the fact that I wanted her more than I'd ever wanted anything, and I knew that I wanted her as more than a submissive. I wanted to share my life with her, and it scared the hell out of me because I didn't know how to share my life. I just realized that without her, it would be empty.

I pulled her towards me and kissed her deeply. I felt her stir in my arms, and then she was kissing me too. She was no longer wearing my collar, so she wasn't my sub. I wasn't fucking a sub in my playroom. I was making love with my beloved Anastasia Steele.


	12. Chapter 12: Day after Play, Part 1 (APOV

**Chapter 12: The Day after the Play Party** _(Anastasia's POV)_

I woke from the most delicious dream to an even more delicious reality. Christian was kissing me. We were in a bed, and he was on top of me kissing me passionately, and it felt incredible. So good, so incredibly amazing. My hands were free, and I didn't feel any restraints on my legs either. I also didn't feel a collar around my neck. I couldn't think beyond that. I could only feel. I wrapped my legs around him and fervently returned his kisses. I was conscious enough to be careful not to touch his back, so I put my hands in his hair. Oh God, this felt good. I felt like I was flying as our bodies joined together. I looked into the grey depths as I jumped off the cliff, and I felt like I could soar there forever.

When I began to surface again from the bliss that I had just flown away to, I looked up at his gorgeous face, smiled, and said, "Thirteen!" But I was shocked by what I saw. Christian had tears in his eyes. What? I sat up quickly, full of alarm. "What's wrong? Christian, what happened?"

He didn't answer immediately but simply pulled me closer to him. I was trying to avoid touching his chest, but the way he was holding me, it was hard. I sat up again, trying to get a better look at his face.

Christian used the bed sheet to wipe his face, and then he smiled at me. "Stop worrying, Ana. There's nothing wrong, baby. Not a single thing is wrong. Everything is perfect, for the first time ever."

"What do you mean, Christian? You're scaring me. What's going on? Are we... are we in your bedroom?" I looked around me and noticed the tranquil blue walls and dark furniture. I liked this room.

"Yes, Ana," Christian answered. He sat up and smiled his panty dropping smile. "Welcome to my bedroom. You're the first woman I've ever let in here other than my house keeper and my mother. I hope you'll spend a lot of time here in the future."

I melted at that smile, but I needed to get to the bottom of things. "I'm so confused. I don't remember how we got here. And I'm not wearing a collar or calling you Master. And we just... God, that wasn't fucking, Christian. We just... we just..."

"We just made love, Ana," he finished the words that I had been afraid to speak.

"Yes, that was making love," I readily agreed. "And you made me come. Again. If you count the two I had in your office yesterday, that's fifteen orgasms I've had in the past 24 hours."

"I think we could make it to at least twenty before the 24 hours is up," Christian said with a smirk.

"No!" I shouted, and then I laughed hard and fell back on the bed. "No, please! I'm so sore, I'm not sure I can walk. I'm not wearing your collar, so I'm allowed to say no right now, right?"

Christian lay back and propped himself up on his elbow. He smirked at me as he said, "You did ask for multiple orgasms. We aim to please."

I laughed at him and responded, "Well, thank you very much. I think I owe you a few."

He answered, "Yeah well, we don't do things tit for tat around here. But if you insist, I'll be happy to collect on them... later. Right now, I'm enjoying just talking with you. Another first."

I smiled at him. "You know what... about those dozen orgasms last night... and the ones before that too... I thought it was because of the kinky shit you were doing. But my God, you just blew that theory out of the water. What just happened, Christian? What did I just wake up to? And... why were you crying?"

I watched as Christian's face underwent several changes, showing anxiety then acceptance then adoration, and then settling in a shy, hopeful smile. It confused the hell out of me because it was the last thing I expected from him. He looked at me with that confusing smile for a few moments before he answered. "Well, Ana... I've never felt anything that... profound. Besides, I seem to recall making you cry at least twice last night, so I'd say we're even."

"Christian... you just said we don't do things tit for tat. Don't try to change the subject. What do you mean, profound?"

Christian sighed loudly, sat up in the bed, and looked me in the eyes. "Ana, don't you realize...? I've never had vanilla sex before. This was the first time. And it was... there are no words. It was... absofuckinglutely amazing."

"So you were a vanilla virgin?" I asked with a smirk.

"Mmm hmm." He smirked back at me.

"Holy shit!" I cried. "My first kinky sex followed by your first vanilla sex. That's tit for tat at its very best." I giggled.

Christian's smile deepened. "God, I love that sound. I wish I could bottle that sound and carry it around with me."

"What sound?" I asked.

"Your cute little giggle. I have a new goal in life. To make you giggle as often as possible."

I rewarded him with another giggle. He smiled lovingly at me. Was this the same Christian? Where was my commanding Dom from last night? Where was the CEO that I had worked with yesterday? Who was this man with the confusing smile?

"Ana, there's more," he said, and his face grew serious, but his eyes kept that look of adoration. He swallowed before he continued, "When I woke up this morning, something happened that freaked the hell out of me." As soon as these last words were out of his mouth, Christian looked afraid.

I sat up straighter and looked at him with concern. "Christian, what is it?" He looked so vulnerable, so unlike himself. What the hell was going on?

It took several seconds of silence before Christian spoke again. "First, when I woke up, I looked at the clock. It was almost noon. We went to sleep around 3:30, Ana. Normally, I would have been up by 6 a.m. I never sleep more than three or four hours, but last night I slept eight hours. I've never slept that long, not even when I was a child. And I didn't have a nightmare. Ana, I've never in my life not had a nightmare, as far back as I can remember."

"Wow!" I responded. "I'm so glad you slept well, but... why do you suppose that happened?"

He looked at me in wonder. "I don't know... but I'm pretty sure... you had something to do with it."

"Me?!" I questioned. Was he serious? Yes, I could see he was very serious.

Christian explained, "I was afraid to sleep with you because I thought I might hurt you if I had a nightmare while you were in my bed, but you... Well, we'll have to try it out again to see if that's it. Spend the night with me again tonight, Anastasia. I want to test my theory."

"Is that the only reason you want me to spend the night again?" I teased him. "And are you sure we're actually going to sleep?"

Christian smirked at me. "If the day goes the way I plan, then yes, you're going to be too exhausted to do anything other than sleep."

My eyes widened as I remembered what our plans were for today. The contract. And then his playroom. "Christian, as much as I'm looking forward to... everything... I'm sore from last night."

"Don't worry, baby, I'll take care of you," he answered with a smirk.

"Oh, I have no doubt about that," I said, returning his smirk.

As Christian continued to look at me, his expression became more intense. He looked like he wanted to say something else, but he didn't speak. I wanted to ask him what was wrong, but his intense gaze had me mesmerized, and I couldn't speak. The longer we stared at each other, the more hot and bothered I became.

Finally Christian spoke. "You must be hungry. We should get up and have breakfast."

Christian didn't give me a chance to respond. He got up and went into the bathroom. A couple of minutes later, he came out wearing a pair of boxers and a t-shirt. "I'm going to go see what I can find for us to have for breakfast. After breakfast, we can take a bath together, if you'd like." Again, he didn't give me a chance to respond. He strode out of the bedroom, leaving me to ponder all of his words.

As I went into the bathroom, I recalled the dream I was having before I woke up. In the dream, Christian and I were declaring our love for each other. It was beautiful, romantic, full of hearts and flowers, and all the things that Christian Grey is not. Right? But I was so confused by his behavior this morning, I wasn't sure what to think.

I looked in the mirror and saw that I looked like a hot mess. My hair was beyond the just fucked look. It was hopeless, so I pulled it back into a ponytail. My lips looked a bit swollen, probably from all that kissing. My God, did Christian Grey know how to kiss. He could make me melt just by looking at me, but when he kissed me... Wow! Fireworks on the Fourth of July.

And when he was my Dom, and I was his sub, that was just... hot. I had been so afraid to go to the play party, but I felt totally secure with him. He certainly pushed my limits. I did things I didn't think I'd ever do. And I loved doing them. And I'd do them again in a heartbeat if they were with him. I looked at my ass in the mirror and was surprised to find only some slight pink marks there. I didn't feel as sore as I had expected to. The only part of me that felt really sore was my vagina. But after so many orgasms, that was only to be expected. The man knew how to make me come, no question about it. He seemed to know my body better than I knew it myself. How was that even possible? Had I really only met him on Thursday? Just two days ago? I felt like I'd known him for a few years.

There was one thing I knew for sure. There wasn't a doubt in my mind. Over the course of the past two days, I had fallen head over heals in love with Christian Grey. But I would never tell him. Christian Grey didn't do love. When his former subs had fallen for him, he'd ended their contracts. I didn't want to lose this thing that was growing between us, so I would keep my feelings to myself.

When I finished cleaning up, I looked around for something to wear. I found one of Christian's white dress shirts, probably the one he'd worn yesterday before he changed for the party. I decided it was good enough. I didn't have anything to wear, not even a pair of panties. I wasn't sure what Christian had done with the dress I had worn, but I didn't want to wear it. His shirt covered much more of my body that that dress did.

When I found Christian in the kitchen, he was taking a plate out of the microwave. After he put another plate in the microwave, he picked up the warm one and turned to place the plate on the breakfast bar. That's when he saw me, and his eyes filled with humor. "Feel free to help yourself to my clothes," he said with a smirk.

"Well, it was either that or stay naked," I retorted.

His eyes darkened as they roamed over my body. "I think I like that option. If I were your Dom right now, I'd insist on it."

I felt confused. "Aren't you my Dom?" I asked.

"Nope," he answered, popping the p. "I hope to be soon. God, I can hardly wait to get you in my playroom, but I think it would be in your best interest to let you... recover a bit first. We have a contract to discuss first anyway, which we can do this afternoon if you want. But even then, I'll only be your Dom if you're wearing my collar. We've discussed that. You only call me 'Master' if you're collared. Right now, I don't want you to be collared. I'm enjoying being... whatever this is. Your friend? Whatever it is, I like it. But it means you get to choose to keep my shirt on if you want to. You could always choose to take it off for me."

I giggled, which earned another one of his adoring smiles. "Whatever this is... I like it too," I told him. "But I think I'll keep the shirt on... for now."

He leaned down and kissed me. The kiss quickly grew into something deeper. He cupped my ass and squeezed it. "No panties, Miss Steele. I approve."

I giggled again. "I'm sure you do," I said. "And I'm sure you're also aware that I don't have any panties here. Well, except for the two pairs you've stolen from me so far, but I have no idea what you did with them. It's a shame there's not a door to my penthouse. If I'm not mistaken, that's an adjoining wall over there." I pointed towards the foyer.

The way Escala was constructed, A Tower and C Tower had slightly more square footage than B and D, and they overlapped a few feet on each side. On the lower floors, there were doors that connected them, which made it easier for tenants to access some of the facilities located in the center of the four towers. There was a massive underground garage, and each of the penthouses had their own private parking area. There was a massive lobby that took up the first two floors. On the third floor, there was an upscale restaurant and a coffee shop. The fourth floor had a few shops, including a pharmacy and a small supermarket. The fifth floor had a public gym and an indoor swimming pool. I hadn't gotten around to using all of these facilities, but I had used the pool a few times.

"It is an adjoining wall," Christian confirmed. "And we could have a door put in. I did that for the staff quarters. They're in Penthouse B. When I bought both penthouses, I had a door installed to connect them."

"Really?" I hadn't realized that Christian owned both penthouses or that he had an entire penthouse just for his house manager and security.

"Yep," Christian answered. "Elliot could do it. Just think about it. I'd like us to have that kind of access to each other. It would be nice to be able to visit you without having to go down to the lobby, into your elevator, and back up again."

The microwave dinged, and Christian took out the second plate. He placed it in front of me. "Gail made quiche," he said. He took some grapes out of the refrigerator and put them on the breakfast bar. He made himself what he said was his second up of coffee while he also heated water in an electric kettle for my tea. Once all that was ready, we sat down and began to eat.

After we had both taken a few bites, Christian broached the subject of the play party. "So, what did you think?" he asked. "Was it all you were expecting?"

"It was so much more than I was expecting. Kate's been telling me for years, but it's one thing to hear about it and totally something else to experience it first hand. I didn't realize everyone would be so... open. It was like a giant orgy."

"Yes... and... is that a good thing or bad thing?" he asked.

"If you're asking me if I liked it, well, yes... I liked it," I answered. But my voice sounded clipped, and I knew it.

"Wow, if that's what liking it sounds like, I'm glad you didn't hate it," Christian said. He was smirking again, so I knew I hadn't offended him. At least not yet.

"I have mixed feelings, OK," I explained. "There were some things I liked, and some things I didn't."

"That's to be expected," he responded. "So tell me what you liked and what you hated."

I took a deep, calming breath. Then I ate a few more bites before I answered him. "I liked watching. Even the things that shocked me. It's so different to see those things in person instead of on video. I think I'd enjoy going to another play party simply to watch other people play."

"I could tell you liked that. Your body is very responsive," Christian said softly. His voice was so seductive, I melted. He rubbed my erect nipple through the shirt and said, "I love how responsive you are."

"Christian, I'm too sore," I said.

"Don't worry, baby," he responded. "I'll take care of you. But tell me what else... about the play party."

"OK. I liked how you touched me while we watched." I ate another bite of food before I glanced up at him.

He smirked at me. "Is that right?" He put his hand on my thigh and pushed my legs apart. "So you liked it when I touched you like this?" He put his finger inside me

and pumped me a couple of times.

"Christian, please don't. I'm sore," I begged him.

He removed his hand from me and licked his finger. "Mmm... you're my favorite flavor, Ana," he said.

I squeezed my legs together as I felt heat between them. "Christian, if you keep saying things like that, I'm going to need a towel to sit on."

He laughed loudly. Then he grew serious and asked me again to tell him about the play party.

"OK, I liked being restrained. I liked the bed the most. I wasn't crazy about standing up like that to be punished. It wasn't comfortable to stand on my tiptoes that long."

"It wasn't supposed to be comfortable. It was a punishment," he explained.

"Yes, I realize that," I responded. "I didn't mind the crop. It didn't hurt me as badly as I expected it would. Not saying I liked it. I don't think I'll ever get off on that kind of pain. But I understand if you need to do it."

"What did you think of the second punishment?" he asked.

"It was... unexpected. I knew that orgasm denial was a common type of punishment, but I didn't know there was such a thing as death by orgasm."

Christian laughed loudly again. "Death by orgasm. I like it. I'm going to keep calling it that."

"Umm... I think I liked it, as far as punishments go. It did get painful. Really painful. So it works for what you want to achieve when you punish me."

"Ana, what do you think I want to achieve when I punish you?" he asked.

"Well... you want it to hurt enough for me to clearly recognize that's it's punishment, not pleasure. I think you're doing it to correct some kind of behavior that you don't like. And because you enjoy it."

"You think I enjoy punishing you?" he asked me.

"Well, of course you do. Don't deny that, Christian. Why would you do it if you don't enjoy it? I don't mean that you enjoy making me feel pain. I don't know if you enjoy that. Do you enjoy that? Are you a sadist? I know some people in BDSM are, but not everyone is."

Christian looked uncomfortable, and he refused to answer. Instead, he asked, "What did you mean then, that I enjoy punishing you?"

"Well, it's obvious to me that you enjoy it, that's all. You wouldn't be in the BDSM lifestyle, you wouldn't be a Dom, if you didn't enjoy punishing your subs. But I think that it's the control over me that you enjoy most of all, and I'm OK with that because it's giving up the control that I enjoy most of all. But I also think you enjoyed yourself when you were hitting me with that crop. And I'm OK with that too, because I was very attuned to what you were doing. I knew that I wouldn't need to safe word, because I knew that you knew when it got to be almost too much, and you eased up a little as soon as you got there, to that point. I don't know how, but you already know my body that well. I trust you, Christian. Utterly and completely. So it's OK with me if you enjoy inflicting pain, because I know you'll never go too far. It's OK with me if you're a sadist. I've been researching this for five years. I understand sadism from the BDSM perspective, and I'm fine with it. I don't particularly enjoy the pain. I'm not a masochist. I'd prefer just the bondage, dominance and submission, without the rest of it. The B and D without the S and M. But we're in this together, and I can live with the punishments."

Christian stared at me for so long that the silence became uncomfortable. "Say something," I prompted him.

He swallowed. "You're honestly OK that I'm a... a sadist?"

"Christian, you say it as if it's a bad word. You keep telling me to stop judging and to have an open mind. Sadism is part of the BDSM world. To us, it's normal. So yes, I'm honestly OK if you're a sadist, and I don't think that's a bad word."

"Ana... I'm not OK with it," he said in not much more than a whisper.

"But Christian, if it's part of who you are, then that's OK. I lo... I like you as you are, including this part of you." Holy shit! I almost told him I love him. Careful, Ana!

Christian stood up and began to pace the floor. He had both hands in his hair. Holy shit, whatever was going on, whatever his inner struggle was, it was huge. Was it because he knew I almost said those words? I started feeling very worried that he was going to ask me to leave.

After pacing a few minutes in silence, Christian stood in front of me with a look of resolve. I felt panic because I knew he was going to tell me to go home. Christian Grey doesn't do love. I knew that. Why couldn't I keep those words to myself?

"Ana... I don't enjoy hurting you," he said. "I do enjoy testing your limits and pushing your body in ways it's never been pushed before. I love showing you a world you've never known before. But I don't like hurting you."

"OK, Christian..." I said softly.

"Let me finish," he interrupted. "You're the first one... This is the first time I haven't enjoyed it. I'm not usually as careful as I was with you last night. Any other sub would have either needed to use a safe word or had a much higher pain tolerance. It's only because it's you, Ana. I am a sadist. I do enjoy punishing little brown haired subs who remind me of my birth mother. I'm fifty shades of fucked up, Ana."

"Oh, Christian," I responded. I felt tears in my eyes, but I tried to hold them back.

"I've been asking myself... would you still want to be with me if you knew how fucked up I am? I was determined to keep it from you, but you just had to go and disarm me there too, just like in everything else. I've really fucked this up now. You're not going to stay now. I've only just found you, and now I've lost you already."

I stared at him in shock. "Christian... what are you talking about? I'm not going anywhere. You haven't lost me. OK, what you just said... about your birth mother... is a bit... disturbing, but it's not enough to make me leave. Of course not. I just want to know more... but not until you want to tell me. Don't you get it, Christian? I really care about you. Just stop it, OK. You haven't fucked anything up with me."

He stared back at me, obviously confused. "Ana, I just told you... I've never told anyone... You're really not leaving?"

I decided to show him the only way I knew how that I really wasn't leaving. I put my hands on his forearms, where I knew it was safe, and I kissed him with everything that I felt for him. I knew I could never say the words, but without words, I showed him that I loved him. If he were capable of it, if the way he responded was any indicator, he felt the same way about me. At some point, I lost my shirt, and I ended up sitting on the breakfast bar with my legs wrapped around Christian. He wasn't just kissing me. He was sucking my face, literally. He was clinging to me as if he thought I might disappear at any moment.

After several minutes of kissing, Christian looked up at me and said, "Ana, what I feel for you scares the shit out of me."

"Me too, Christian," I responded, and I kissed him again.

Christian growled. "Ana, you're sore. You should know that I can't resist you. I'm going to fuck you if you keep kissing me like that, and you need to rest, baby." These were his words, but his hands were telling a different story as they caressed my body.

I yielded to his touch and melted into him. "Christian, I don't care how sore I am. I need you."

Within seconds, he was inside me, and within a minute, we had both jumped off the mountainside together. We were just coming down off our high when we heard a dry cough behind us. I screamed, and Christian looked startled.

"Taylor, what the fuck!?" he shouted.

Taylor didn't enter the room or look in our direction. "I'm sorry to disturb you sir, but your mother is on her way up."

"My mother!" Christian shouted. "Oh, shit! Stall her, Taylor. We'll go get dressed."

Christian was already standing between my legs, so it was a simple thing for him to pick me up and carry me to his bedroom. I was panicking.

"Christian, I don't have any clothes here. Leave me here and go talk with your mom. I'll take a shower and come back out after she leaves."

"No way, Ana. You're meeting her," he responded as he pulled his jeans up.

I was getting angry. "And what do you suggest I wear?" I asked him. "I don't even have any underwear. How is your mom going to react when she sees your naked sub?"

Now Christian was angry. "You're not my fucking sub," he spit.

I felt overwhelmed, and even more angry. "What is the social etiquette of meeting the mother of your... who the hell knows what... when you DON'T HAVE ANY CLOTHES!?"

Christian was fully dressed now, and I was still completely naked. He stared at me in shock for a moment. I'm sure he had never heard me yell, and he was not accustomed to being talked to like that. But hell, he had just insisted that I wasn't his damn sub, so he needed to deal with it.

After a minute of staring at me in shock, Christian began to laugh. It started out as a snigger and grew quickly to an all out belly laugh. At first, his laugher made me angrier, but before long, I was laughing too.

"OK, Ana, you've trusted me so far, so trust me now," Christian said. "My mom is an angel. She's going to love you. And she's not going to care what you're wearing."

I wasn't as angry anymore as I replied, "Christian, I already know your mom though charity work, but I've never met her in the capacity of my... whatever you are... as your mom. And do I need to remind you? I'M NAKED!"

He didn't comment on my nakedness, but his eyes showed that he didn't need the reminder. "What am I, Ana?" Christian asked, as he looked in his chest of drawers and took out some sweatpants with a drawstring waist. "In spite of what we announced yesterday, I know we aren't fooling anyone that we're just friends, and you're sure as hell more than a sub to me. Girlfriend? Do you want to be my girlfriend? Everything with you is new, so I think it's OK that I've never done that before."

I swallowed nervously. "Is that what you want?" I asked as I slipped on the sweatpants and tied the drawstring as tight as I could.

Christian handed me a dark gray Harvard t-shirt. "It's a good place to start," he said. "But I want so much more than that, Anastasia."

I swallowed, wondering what he meant. "OK, let's start there," I told him. This was a conversation that we needed to have... but not when his mother was in the other room waiting for us. "How do I look?" I asked.

Christian laughed again, which made me angry again. "I'm sorry," he said. "You just look so fucking adorable. Mom's going to love you. Come on, let's go meet her."

"Christian, seriously, do I look OK?" I asked nervously.

"Anastasia, sweetheart, you look good enough to eat. And I'm going to prove that to you as soon as my mom leaves."

"Christian Grey, don't say things that you know will make my nipples hard when I don't have a bra on. And I'm about to meet your mother."

"Anastasia Steele, my mother is an intelligent person. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what we've been doing, or where you slept last night."

"Christian, this is already so embarrassing... do you have to make it worse?" I asked. I went into the bathroom and took my hair out of the ponytail, finger combed it, and replaced the ponytail.

Christian had followed me into the bathroom. "Am I making it worse?" he asked innocently. "I thought I was trying to make it better."

I rolled my eyes. "You're impossible! How is reminding me that your mother will know as soon as she sees us that we've been fucking like rabbits supposed to make me feel better?"

Christian didn't respond. He simply stood there smirking at me, which made me angrier than I already was. Finally, he spoke playfully. "God, I can't wait to get you in my playroom. I can't wait to punish you, Anastasia."

"Punish me?!" I spit. "What the hell do you think you're going to punish me for? And I thought you said I wasn't your fucking sub."

Christian's smile grew wider, and he was turning me on. "You will be my sub when we go into the playroom. As soon as you sign our contract, I'm putting my collar on you. And what will I punish you for? Well, there was the eye roll just a minute ago. Before that, you yelled at me. So disrespectful, Ana. You need to be punished."

And just like that, not only was my anger diffused, but I also was so wet I was glad that the sweatpants were black. "Christian Grey... you don't play fair," I mumbled. I'm sure he could see from my erratic breathing and hard nipples how turned on I was.

"Come on, sweetheart," he said, "Mother is waiting." He took my hand and led me back into the Living Room, where Dr. Grace Trevelyan-Grey was sitting sipping a glass of water.

"Mom! What a surprise!" Christian called out as we entered the room.

"Christian?" she stood up when she saw us and walked towards us. At first, she looked worried, but that quickly turned to shock when she saw me. "I'm sorry darling, I'm intruding," she said as she gave Christian a side hug. "I didn't know... I was worried when you didn't answer your phone or return my messages. That's not like you."

"Don't worry, Mom, it's OK. We had a late morning, and I haven't checked my phone since we got up. Mom, I believe you already know Anastasia Steele?"

"Hi, Grace," I greeted her warmly. "It's great to see you again."

"The pleasure is all mine, my dear," she responded, her face still showing obvious shock. But she smiled warmly at Christian, and then at me. Once she got over the shock, she actually looked delighted.

"Mom, I want you to be the first to know," Christian said. He put his arm around me and pulled me towards him. "Ana and I are seeing each other."

"Well, I can see that, darling. And I'm so happy!" she responded. She turned to me and said, "You'll have to join us for Sunday brunch tomorrow, Ana dear."

I smiled politely even though I still felt very embarrassed about how I was dressed. "Thank you, Grace. That sounds lovely. I'll check my schedule and let you know later today if I can make it."

"Wonderful!" Grace responded. "Well, I'll leave you kids to it. I was just shopping in the area and thought Christian might want to have lunch."

"Sorry, Mom," Christian said. "I'd love to take a rain check though."

"I'd like that, darling," she answered. She walked towards the foyer, and we followed her, arm in arm. She turned towards me and gave me an enormous hug. "You just made my day, darling girl," she said. She turned to Christian and kissed his cheek. "See you tomorrow, son," she said.

"OK, Mom," he answered, and we watched her as the elevator doors closed.


	13. Chapter 13: Day after Play, Part 2 (APOV

**Chapter 13: The Day after the Play Party, Part 2** _(Anastasia's POV)_

As soon as the elevator doors closed behind his mother, Christian drug me back into his bedroom, where he attacked me with his lips. He came up for air long enough to say, "Bath time!" Then he was kissing me again while dragging me into the bathroom. Somehow, he managed to turn on the tap in the bathtub, add bath oil, start playing music on his iPhone, undress both of us, and never stop kissing me. He stopped kissing me long enough to help me get into the tub. He got in behind me, pulled me to his chest, and continued to kiss my neck while he massaged my breasts. From his lovemaking, the warm soapy water, the comforting citrusy scent of the bath oil, and the soft romantic music that was playing, I was in heaven.

I sighed contentedly before I said. "Christian, for someone who swore to me two days ago that he didn't do hearts and flowers, you sure are good at it."

He didn't respond at all how I expected him to. "Ana... I've had a really fucked up life. I'm a huge fuck-up."

"Is that right?" I asked. "Is that how you became so successful? You became a multi-billionaire by being a fuck-up? Christian, do you really believe that about yourself?"

Christian was quiet for a few minutes. He continued to gently rub my shoulders and caress my breasts. After a while, he confessed, "I'm so afraid that when you really get to know me, you'll leave."

"That's bullshit, Christian," I responded gently. "You told me yourself that I know you better than anyone. You've shared secrets with me that you've never shared with anyone, right? So far, everything I've learned has only made me either admire you more or want to understand you better, or both. You are an amazing human being."

"Amazing... now you're just being cheesy," he said bitterly.

"Maybe I am, but it's true. And I'm sure I'm not the first sub to have thought so."

"Will you quit calling yourself a sub," Christian said in an irritated tone.

"Why, Christian? I am your sub. I want to be your sub."

"Anastasia, there's no collar around your neck, so you aren't my sub. You're so much more than a sub to me. I never felt anything for any of them."

"Yes, I know. They were just your fuck partners. You told me. But I think they felt more than that for you. You're so lovable, Christian."

"You have no idea how untrue that statement is," he said sadly.

"You have no idea how true it is," I countered.

"Whatever, Ana," Christian said.

"Did you just roll your eyes, Christian?" I asked him. I couldn't see his face, but I was pretty sure his tone of voice accompanied an eye roll.

He laughed. "What if I did, Anastasia?

"Maybe I should be the one punishing you," I joked.

"Mmm... Would you like that, baby?" he asked. I could feel his smile as he nibbled my neck.

"You've subbed before, haven't you. Didn't you say you started out as a sub?" I asked.

"Mmm hmm. Over four years. Almost five." I detected bitterness in his tone.

"Is that why you have such a low opinion of subs?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "I don't have a low opinion of subs. Subs are the ones who have all the power in a BDSM relationship."

"That's bullshit," I responded. "It's a power exchange. You both have power. And yes, you do have a low opinion. Otherwise, you wouldn't get pissed off every time I refer to myself as your sub."

"Because you're so much more than that, Ana. I keep telling you that."

"Christian, I'm sure I'm way out of line saying this, because you've been in this lifestyle for years, and I've only been in it for two days, but I think whoever taught you about BDSM did a crappy job. I've done my homework. I know for a fact that there are couples in BDSM relationships who are very loving. Some of them are even married."

Christian was quiet for a long time, and I felt I needed to wait for him to respond. Finally he spoke, and he sounded so sad. "You're right. I did have a crappy teacher. I didn't realize how crappy until two years ago. Even after I ended our contract, I remained... friends... with her. So I thought. She even subbed for me. Trained me as a Dom after I had been her sub for four years. Then she started matching me with subs."

Holy shit! I was sure I already knew the answer, but I had to ask. "Christian, are you saying that the person you referred to yesterday when we were talking about friendship... She's the same one who molested you when you were fifteen?"

"It's not molestation if it's consensual," he responded. "But yes, it's the same person. Her name is Elena Lincoln. She's still friends with my parents. They don't know even half of the shit she's done."

Now I felt angry. "Christian, it can't be consensual if you're below the age of consent. What she did was not only immoral but also illegal. If you had pressed charges, she would have gone to prison. You still could..."

"No!" he interrupted. "Even if I believed she had molested me, which I don't, it's too late to prosecute her. I would have needed to file a police report within a year of the... _alleged_ abuse. Then I would have ten years to file charges. It's past that now. I researched it two years ago when I was so angry I wanted to hurt her."

"What did she do, Christian?" I asked. "I mean two years ago?"

Christian sighed loudly, wrapped his arms around me, and pressed his forehead against my back. "It's OK. You don't have to tell me," I said. "You don't have to talk about it at all."

"No, I'll tell you," he said. He kept his forehead pressed against my back, and he kissed my back a couple of times. It tickled, and I couldn't hold in my giggle.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to laugh," I told him. "You tickled me."

He raised his head and said, "Don't apologize, Anastasia. I love the sound of your cute little giggle."

"This is hardly the time for it," I answered.

"It's the perfect time for it," he responded. "It made me relax, and what I'm about to tell you makes me tense. So it was perfect timing. I'll have to remember to tickle you whenever I need to relax." He tickled my sides, and I responded by giggling loudly.

"Christian, stop!" I pulled away from him, making water splash over the sides of the tub. "You're going to make me pee myself!"

"You're sitting in a bathtub full of water, Anastasia. Doesn't really matter if you pee yourself."

"That's disgusting!" I responded. "And besides, we're getting the floor wet."

"I'd rather be getting you wet," Christian said. "Don't worry about the floor. It's a wet room."

"I'm already wet, Christian," I said.

"Really?" he asked innocently as he slid his hand between my legs and into my core. He pumped his fingers inside me. "You're right. Nice and wet. Just the way I like you."

"God, Christian, you're going to kill me," I moaned.

Christian removed his hand and sat up a little straighter. "Nope, not now, not ever. But I am going to tell you a story. About Elena. Turn around so I can look at you. I'll rub your feet."

Christian wasn't using his Dom voice, but I obeyed him without hesitation anyway. I moved to the other side of the tub and spread my legs out in front of me. He took my feet in his hands and rubbed them until I moaned again.

"Ana, if you want me to tell you this story instead of burying myself balls deep inside you, then you need to stop moaning like you do when I fuck you."

I responded by giggling again, and this time I could see the look of adoration on his face. We gazed at each other a moment, and my face probably mirrored his look of adoration. Did he know I loved him? Should I risk telling him? Somehow, I didn't think it would freak him out as it had with his other subs. But I was still too afraid of losing him to say anything.

Christian picked up my foot and began to rub it again. "So...Elena. You know about the first part. You know how I became her sub. That lasted four full years. All through high school. Then I went away to college. Harvard. During the months I was in Massachusetts, she called me almost daily, and she visited a couple of times. I also came home during the holidays, and I saw her then. Understand, Anastasia, I wanted to see her. I wanted to talk with her. I trusted her. I let her control me. But... something changed that Spring. I hated Harvard... I didn't see the point, and when I talked to her about it, I started hating the control she had over me too. I realized I didn't want to be controlled. I wanted to have the control, and I didn't have any, and I hated it. My parents and Elena controlled every part of my life, and I wanted out. I wanted to take over the reigns, and I knew I could do it. My classes were a waste of time. I wanted to start my business. Finally, I worked up the nerve to tell Elena. She was much more understanding than I expected her to be."

"You mean about your business idea?" I clarified.

"I mean about everything," he answered. "In hind sight, I realize that she was trying to alienate me from my parents so that I would have to depend on her more, and it worked. I didn't acknowledge that until two years ago. But during my second semester at Harvard, when I went home for Spring Break, Elena and I spent a lot of time talking about my plan to quit school and start my business. I also told her I wanted to end our contract and be a Dom. By the end of the week, we had a plan, and it all seemed too good to be true. She would train me to be a Dom... and honestly, at the time, I couldn't imagine there being a better trainer. She agreed to sub for me for six months, during which she would train me. She would also loan me 100 grand to start GEH, and if I paid her back within a year, it would be interest free. I knew when I told my parents that I was dropping out of college, they were likely to cut me off, but I would have enough to live on until I started making money. That's exactly what happened."

"Your parents cut you off?" I asked incredulously.

"Financially, yes," he answered without showing any emotion. "They were so convinced that if they did the 'tough love' thing that I'd go back to school, and they were sure that I wouldn't be able to succeed without a college degree. It took a couple of years for me to prove them wrong. I did pay Elena back within a year, but it was a couple of years before my name started to get out there. I rarely saw my parents during those two years, but after I received a couple of prestigious awards, things changed a little. They apologized for not believing in me. It was... awkward."

"But... things are better with them now?" I asked hopefully.

Christian looked uncomfortable. "I guess... I don't know. I see them now. I usually go to the brunch Mom usually hosts on Sundays. We can go together tomorrow if you want to."

"Yes, I'd like that," I responded.

"Good," Christian said. He smiled sadly. "I guess things are better. But... it doesn't change the fact that I'm a huge screw-up. I'll always be a disappointment to them because I didn't complete that Harvard degree. I gave them hell as a teenager. I mean before... Elena. I was always getting into trouble. Drinking, fighting, getting kicked out of schools. It's only because of Dad's legal expertise that I don't have a juvie record. The least I could have done to repay them for all they've done for me was finish the degree, if not for me, then for them. It's all they wanted. But I was too selfish and stubborn. And Elena encouraged me. Now I know why. It was her way of maintaining control over me. But I was too blind to see it then."

"But... how?" I asked. "If you stopped subbing for her, how did she keep control over you? If you were her Dom, couldn't you control her instead?"

Christian smiled sadly again. "She kept control of me by manipulating me. She started by subbing for me, yes. We wrote a new BDSM contract that Spring break. A six-month contract that would begin as soon as I returned home. She used those six months to learn everything she could about my preferences. She knew it wouldn't work for either of us for her to try to sub for me long-term. So at the end of the contract, we made a new agreement. She became my match-maker, in a matter of speaking. She would match me with submissives who fit my list of preferences."

"She sounds like a pimp," I blurted.

Christian laughed, but there was no real humor behind it. "Yes, I guess you could say that too, in hindsight. I certainly didn't see it that way at the time."

"Where did she find these... girls?" I asked.

"Good question," he responded. "She was better connected in the BDSM world than I had realized. She not only had frequented clubs, but I found out later, she even owned one. She never took me to a club. I realized later it was because of my age. And after I turned 18, I went away to college. So for the majority of the time that I was her sub, I was underage, and she didn't want that to get out, for obvious reasons. I was her dirty little secret."

"So... she found the girls to sub for you at BDSM clubs?" I asked.

"Not exactly, but she used the contacts she had through the clubs. It's complicated and it doesn't matter. The point is that she was the point person for thirteen of the fifteen arrangements I've had. The first twelve went smoothly enough, so I thought. The thirteenth was disastrous."

"That unlucky number thirteen," I muttered.

"Yes," he agreed. "Her name was Leila Williams, and our contract lasted for exactly four months. That part was actually pretty typical, but not much else was. The first three months, she was a perfect submissive. Too perfect, in hindsight. She'd show up here on Friday afternoon, go straight to the playroom, strip off all her clothes, and wait for me. I'd find her there, kneeling patiently. She let me do anything to her. No hard limits. She never safe-worded even when I beat the hell out of her."

I gulped. "And... you think that's a perfect submissive? To have no hard limits, to never use a safe word?" I stared at him, wide-eyed.

"No, Ana, that's not what I want from you," he said, as he caressed my calves. "But yes, I thought so at the time. You have to understand how selfish I was. I only thought about what I was getting out of it, not whether she wanted it too. Apparently, she enjoyed getting the hell beat out of her. I didn't care, and she didn't complain."

"So, what happened?" I asked.

"She started acting... strange. It started out as attempts to touch me. My submissives never touched me. Anywhere. It was in our contract, one of my hard limits. She began with light touches to my hands when she thought I wouldn't notice. But of course, I always noticed. Then, she started trying to talk to me when we were in a scene. She wasn't supposed to speak at all. I didn't expect her to even safe word because she didn't have any limits and her pain threshold was through the roof. So there was no reason for her to speak."

"What did she say," I asked, just out of curiosity.

"She was topping from the bottom, asking me to go further... to do things, sexually. I responded by gagging her and punishing her. It happened three times, and I responded the same way each time. After the third time, I took her to my office and ended the contract. That was when the real weirdness began. I expected emotions. When I'd ended it with others who had grown... attached, they had cried. I was prepared for the water works. But I wasn't prepared for... aggression. She tried to kiss me. I never kissed my submissives, and she knew it."

"You never kissed your submissives... ever?" I asked for clarification.

"Not on the lips. Never," he affirmed.

"But... you kissed me." I felt confused.

"Yes, I did," he responded. He looked at my lips like he wanted to kiss me again.

"But... why?" I asked. "You wanted me to be your submissive... nothing more. Right?"

"I wanted to kiss you, so I did. I didn't know I could do more than a Dom-sub agreement. I had never wanted to try until I met you. And now, I never want to stop kissing you."

"OK, now I understand why you keep saying I'm not your sub," I responded.

"You are so much more than a sub. I've never taken a bath with any of my subs either. This is the first time I've ever bathed with someone. I never did anything intimate with any of my subs."

"You had sex, Christian. It doesn't get more intimate than that."

"Sex isn't always intimate. It wasn't for me. But now it is."

I smiled sadly at him. Sadly because I suspected what his former submissives had felt for him. "It may not have been intimate for you, but maybe it was for them. Maybe it was intimate for Leila."

Christian's sad smile matched my own. "Yes, it apparently was. After I pushed her away, after she tried to kiss me, she told me two things. One, she was in love with me, and two, she was pregnant."

"Pregnant?!" I exclaimed.

"She wasn't. She was lying. But I believed her. She was very... convincing. She described in detail how she had poked holes in all my condoms, and how she had lied about taking the pill."

"Holy shit! That must have been devastating for you. What did you do?"

Christian's face showed the memory of the devastation he had felt. "I kicked her out. I went through with ending the contract, and I sent her home. I told her that I would support the child, if she kept it, once I had proof of paternity. But I was done with her, and I made that clear to her in no uncertain terms. I sent all her clothes to her the next day."

"Clothes?" I asked.

"Yes, I purchased a wardrobe for all my submissives. I have a personal shopper. I sent her their measurements and my... specifications, and she would purchase the clothes and send them here. I have a room upstairs where my submissives slept when they were here, and I would stock their closet with new clothes, which they got to keep."

"Wow, that was... generous," I said. I didn't mean to sound sarcastic.

Christian sighed. "They each got a new car too. And a black AMEX that they could use to shop to their heart's delight during the timespan of our contract. They had to give back the credit card when we ended our agreement, but they got to keep the car and clothes, and anything they had purchased with the credit card. And... there were a few...if I was particularly pleased with them... We didn't always end on bad terms... I paid for their education. College tuition. Sometimes graduate school. I helped one get her law degree. Another one started medical school, but she had to drop out."

"Wow, you really were generous. I didn't mean to imply that you weren't." I said.

"It was nothing for me," he said. "It seemed only fair, considering what they were giving me, or what they had given me. But I looked at it as a business relationship. Fair exchange. I didn't count on emotions and shit. I thought if I kept my heart removed, then I couldn't break theirs. Leila proved me wrong there."

"So what happened?" I asked.

"I called Elena. Of course. I always called her. She always advised me. I was such an idiot to listen to her. But anyway, this time, she didn't advise me. She was livid. I'd never seen her that angry. She called Leila all manner of names, and told me she'd get to the bottom of it."

"That's... strange," I said.

"Yes, I thought so too. Why was she so angry? I couldn't understand it. But a few days later, it all became clear. I heard from Leila again. She was sneaky. Submissives were never to contact me for any reason after we ended our agreement, but she disguised herself so much that even Taylor didn't recognize her, and Taylor is the best there is at security. She pretended to be a business rep that I had only had minimal contact with through emails up to that point. How she knew that I'm not sure. She pretended to run into me at a coffee shop, and when she introduced herself as the other person, she disguised her voice, so I didn't recognize her. She was able to weasel her way back to my office, and there, she revealed her true identity. I called security immediately, but before I got her out of there, she gave me a copy of an ultrasound, which I later determined to be a fake, and she revealed something... earth shattering."

"More earth shattering than an ultrasound that was supposed to convince you that you were the father of her unborn child?" I asked incredulously.

"Yes, even more earth shattering than that, for me anyway. She begged me to take her back, but I refused. She said that even if things were over between us, that she wanted me to know the truth, that she had been reporting back to Elena, and she couldn't let me go without telling me, because she loved me... she didn't want me to get hurt... all that kind of bullshit. I didn't believe her at first, but things started adding up. After fact checking, I knew... about that at least, she was telling me the truth."

"So... Elena had her... spying on you?" I asked.

"Not just her. All of them. She paid them to video some of our scenes without my knowledge, and to report back to her with details about every scene. And every conversation that they overheard. Not that I had many in front of them, but if I was with them long enough, I lowered my guard. It wasn't unusual for me to take business calls while they were in the room with me. Leila told me about the reports she had sent to Elena. She even brought copies of them. Before I confronted Elena, I contacted eight of the other twelve, and with enough... persuasion... they all admitted that they also had videoed at least one scene, and that they had reported to Elena... for a price."

"Wow! And it's not like you could press charges for what they did. BDSM contracts aren't enforceable. The NDA was, but I'm sure you wouldn't...

"No," he interrupted. "Of course, I wouldn't. I had more to lose by bringing charges against them. But, I had... other ways... to get them back for what they did to me."

"What did you do?" I asked, wide-eyed.

Christian looked a little remorseful for a moment, but then it passed, and his face was expressionless. "If the subs were forthcoming, and if they told me everything they could remember about their dealings with Elena Lincoln, I let it go with just a few threats. There were a few that I was still funding. Education and what not. That all ended immediately. But they understood, and they were remorseful, for the most part. I haven't had any trouble from any of them. I keep tabs on them. Everything's OK there. There were two who refused to give up any information, who denied everything. Joanna Ricardo and Cassie Ford. They paid the price of crossing Christian Grey. Joanna was a kindergarten teacher, but she lost her job after rumors about her sex life made it back to parents of her pupils. It can never be proven that I had anything to do with leaking racy photos of her. Cassie was the medical student who had to drop out after I cut off her funding."

I felt a little worried about him. "But how can you be sure they won't try to get back at you? Or haven't they tried? What became of them?"

"No, they didn't try to get back at me," he answered. "And they won't. They both learned the hard way not to fuck with me. Cassie wasn't able to achieve her dream of becoming a doctor, but I used some of my connections to get her in to a program where she was able to finish her nursing degree... after she gave me what I wanted. And without any more funding from me. Joanna got a job in another school district after several months of not even being granted an interview. She learned how long my reach is. I was forgiving... after they came clean, and there aren't any lingering bad feelings."

"So... what about Elena?" I asked.

"Yes, well, there are lingering bad feelings there. But let's get out of this cold water first. Then I'll tell you."

Christian got out of the tub and held a towel for me. I stepped out and into his arms. Christian smirked at me and said, "I seem to recall making a certain promise earlier."

I smiled, even though I had no idea what he was talking about. "A promise? To me?" I asked.

"Mmm hmm," he said as he began to dry me off. "Should I refresh your memory? You were concerned about how you looked. You were afraid of what my mom would think of you. I told you that you looked good enough to eat." Christian picked me up and set me on the vanity.

"Oh, God," I moaned.

"Nope, just me," Christian responded. "Spread your legs for me, Ana, my love."

I did as he asked in a daze. Did he just call me "my love"? Did I hear him correctly, and if so, what did it mean? Was it a slip of his tongue? Speaking of slips of his tongue, Oh my God! I couldn't think anymore as he began to suck my clit.

"Christian!" I cried out.

He responded by pressing his tongue between my folds. With his hands on each of my knees, he held my legs apart as he ravished me. It only took a few minutes for the orgasm to start building, and only a couple more for the waves of it to hit me full force. Christian looked up at my face, and our eyes locked as he continued to fuck me with his tongue though my orgasm. I never wanted him to stop. My God, would I ever get enough of him?

"Come to bed with me, Ana," Christian said when he finally raised his head. He lifted me off the vanity and carried me into the bedroom.

"Christian, you're going to kill me," I said as he plopped me on the bed and sat down next to me.

"Why do you keep saying that?" he asked, sounding hurt.

I stroked his cheek reassuringly as I explained, "I never expected to have too much sex. I don't think I can..."

"Ana, I'm not going to fuck you right now," Christian said. He pulled the sheet over both of us to hide our nakedness. "I actually want to talk. I want to finish telling you about Elena. I've never wanted to just talk to anyone ever. What are you doing to me? Maybe you're the one who's going to kill me."

"Never," I responded as I tucked the sheet under my arms. "And for the record, I like talking with you too. And I like fucking you too, but I just need a break."

"I know," Christian said. "I won't fuck you again until after we sign the contract and go to the playroom. Later. And even then, we'll be a lot more... gentle... than usual."

"OK," I replied, trying to hide the excitement I felt. "So... Elena."

"Elena," he repeated, like he had a bad taste in his mouth. "The wicked witch of the west."

"The pedo-bitch," I agreed.

"The epitome of evil," he added.

"Bitch-troll," I said.

"She-devil," he said.

"Abhorrent whore," I countered.

"Botox battle ax," he added, making me giggle.

"Nauseating nonce," I said, earning a snort from him.

"Douchebag dominatrix ," he threw back at me.

"Chickenshit chickenhawk," I threw back. I felt like we were playing tennis, and I loved it. He didn't seem to mind all my pedophile references.

"Dick-sucking, brain-sucking leach ," Christian said.

"Viper, ass wiper, diaper sniper," I blurted back to him.

"Hyena-humping heinous heifer... with fake teats," Christian tossed back, not missing a beat. I worked hard to keep a straight face.

"Filthy cunt," I tossed back, with barely a hesitation.

Christian abruptly stood up, walked into the bathroom, came back with the Harvard t-shirt that I had been wearing earlier, and tossed it to me. When he walked back towards me, I saw how prominent his erection was. "You're so sexy when you talk dirty," he said. "Put that on before I go back on my word and fuck you senseless. Holy fuck, you haven't even met her yet. I can only imagine how you're going to react once you've met her."

"You think I'm going to meet her?" I asked as I slipped the t-shirt over my head.

"I'm sure you will sooner or later," he answered as he put on a pair of boxers and got back into bed. "She's friends with my parents, and you're going to be spending time with my family... I hope." His tone became uncertain. "That's... if you want to. You did agree to be my girlfriend."

I smiled at him reassuringly. "Yes, I did. And I want to spend time with your family. But I can't make any promises to be nice to the pedo-bitch."

"I liked 'filthy cunt' better," he said with a smirk. "Say it again."

I giggled. "Filthy cunt. Don't be surprised if I call her that to her face. I hate her."

He smiled adoringly. "Like I said, you don't even know her. How can you hate her?"

"I know what she did to you," I said. "You told me, and even if you don't agree that she molested you, there's no other way to see it."

"You sound like Flynn," Christian said.

"Who's that?" I asked.

"My therapist," he answered. "He's been trying to convince me for years that she abused me. I just don't see it that way. But I agree that she's an evil bitch."

I nodded my head in agreement. "You were only fifteen. She took advantage of a troubled boy. Of course I hate her." I spit those words.

Christian smiled again. "Easy there, tigress. I don't think she molested me, and in some ways I feel indebted to her. She taught me discipline when it was sorely lacking from my life. But she betrayed me, and I'll never forgive her. And if she keeps fucking with me, I'm going to destroy her."

"Is she still fucking with you?" I asked.

"Mmm hmm. She's never stopped. She's always fucked with me, but until two years ago, she always got away with it because I didn't see it. And now, she still gets away with it because of those damn videos."

"You mean the ones from your submissives?" I asked. "Can't you get them from her? Wipe them from her hard drive? Get someone to break into her safe to steal any hard copies?"

Christian looked annoyed. "Been there, done that. She's either bluffing, or she still has copies. Probably in a safe deposit box somewhere. Probably multiple copies. I can't risk it. Those videos will ruin me if they get in the wrong hands. You know people don't understand our lifestyle. To the average person, it looks like I'm beating the hell out of a helpless female. I'm sure I look like a monster."

I could hear the self deprecation in his voice. "Christian, you're no monster," I said. "It was all consensual."

"Ana, you don't know..." Christian's voice trailed off. "I'm fifty shades of fucked up. I already told you... I enjoy beating women who look like my birth mother. I _am_ a monster."

I felt the need to help him see his own value. "Christian, have you ever ignored a safe word?" I asked, because I was confident of the answer already.

"No, of course not," he answered.

"Of course not. A monster would ignore safe words. And have you ever beat a woman without first having a contract with her?" I asked. When he stared at me pointedly for a moment, I added, "I mean besides me. I don't count."

Christian answered, "No, until last night, I had never done that. Until this week, I had never had any sexual contact without first having a signed contract."

"And have you ever ignored any of the terms of any of those contracts?" I asked.

"No, of course not," he answered.

"I rest my case," I said. "You're no monster. The subs ignored the terms of the contract when they videoed you and shared those videos with Elena. I assume you had privacy clauses in the contracts, right?"

"Yes," he affirmed.

"So then, if anyone is a monster, it's them, not you. They had to have known how those videos could hurt you," I argued.

Christian sighed loudly. "I don't want to think about it. But the filthy cunt likes holding them over my head. She's still controlling me. God, I hate her."

"Well, that makes two of us. How's she controlling you? I mean, what is she doing?" I asked.

Christian explained, "I'm in business with her. After I paid her back the 100 grand that she loaned me to start my business, a year or so later, she asked me to help her open a line of beauty salons. Esclava. When the shit hit the fan two years ago, I had decided to sell them and cut her off. She threatened to share the videos with my parents. It would kill them."

"So you're still in business with her?" I asked. "You own Esclava?"

"Co-own, with her. She's in charge of all the operations. I just provide the financial backing."

"Couldn't you just sell it to her?" I asked.

"If she'd buy," he answered bitterly. "She isn't interested. She wants to keep me under her thumb."

"You could give them to her," I suggested.

"I tried that too. She's crazy, Ana. She wants to control me more than she wants the salons. The only way to be free of her is to have something over her that I can use as leverage. And she's smart. Great at spinning webs, but hard to catch in one."

I smiled encouragingly. "Yes, well, you're Christian Grey. One of the most brilliant minds in the country. If anyone can defeat her, you can."

"I'm not as brilliant as you are," Christian said, and his smile almost took my breath away.

Suddenly, I had a great idea, and I sat up straight in the bed. My eyes were wide as I said to Christian, "Let's make a pact. Let's work together to take her down."

"Ana..." Christian began. "You don't know..."

"Stop it," I interrupted. "I believe that you and I can accomplish absolutely anything if we put our heads together." I held out my pinky finger, to make another pinky promise, and I said, "Come on, Christian. Let's do this."

He smiled at me, linked his pinky with mine, and said, "You don't know what you're getting yourself into, but OK. But you have to agree to follow my lead. I know you don't want to be controlled outside of the playroom, but you have to agree to listen to me... to _obey_ me... when it comes to Elena Lincoln. She's dangerous. If you'll agree to work with me and not take matters into your own hands, then I'll agree."

"Agreed," I responded.

"Well, then, I guess we're going to take down the filthy cunt," he said dryly.

I laughed and agreed. "I guess we are. So... what do you want to happen to her?"

Christian thought about it for a moment. "I'm not sure. I think it will depend on whether or not she does more harm. Ideally, I'd like to just get her out of my life and let her go on her merry way. Let her live her life... far away from me."

A thought occurred to me that made me shutter. "Christian... do you think she's

molested any other boys? Or do you think you were the only one?"

He looked a little shocked. "Umm... I think I was the only one. I think it was because of her relationship with my parents. She was... attracted to me. Maybe it was because she believed she could help me. I don't think she makes a habit of bringing innocent kids into the lifestyle."

"How sure are you about that?" I asked.

Christian looked uncomfortable. "Fairly sure. She has another submissive now. Isaac. They've been together for over a year."

"How old is he?" I asked.

Christian thought for a moment. "In his twenties I think. I've never actually seen him. Just heard her talk about him."

Something else had been bothering me, and I decided to ask him. "Christian, have you ever considered just telling your parents...?"

"No!" he interrupted. "Absolutely not! I've already hurt them enough. I can't put them through that too."

"But Christian..." I started to try to reason with him. I knew that they would blame themselves, but in the long run, their knowing the truth would bring them closer.

"No! Drop it, Ana. It would kill them. I'm not going there, ever." Christian was adamant.

"OK, then," I responded, and I decided that it was best to drop the matter altogether, at least for now. It hurt him to even consider it, although I felt sure, even though I didn't know them yet, that Carrick and Grace Trevelyan-Grey would respond very differently than how their son thought they would.

After a couple of minutes of quiet contemplation on both our parts, Christian got a cute smirk and evil gleam in his eyes. "So, my princess, don't you think it's time we look at that contract?"

I giggled and answered, "Yes, Master."

"Ana..." He had a warning tone in his voice.

"I know, I know. I'm not wearing your collar. I guess you'll just have to punish me

for that." I rolled my eyes dramatically.

I could tell that he was trying hard not to smile. "After last night, you still haven't learned your lesson about eye rolling?"

"Apparently not... Master," I answered coyly.

He was no longer hiding a smile. "Ana, stop. Calling me that isn't a joke. I need to know that you're serious about it."

I responded, very seriously, "Christian, didn't I prove to you last night how serious I am about being your submissive? I want to be yours, whether I'm wearing a collar or not. As far as I'm concerned, I don't need to wear a collar to call you Master. Whenever we're talking about our sexual relationship, you're my Dom. You just are. If that means you want to make love to me like you did this morning, then I want that too. If that means you want me to drop to my knees and suck you off right here and now, then just say the word. If it means you want to take me to your playroom and do all kinds of kinky fuckery, then I'm ready to go, contract or not. I'm yours, Christian, to take whenever or however you want. Just... be gentle with me right now, because you just about broke my pussy last night."

Christian stared at me for a moment, wide-eyed before he burst out laughing. "I'm not sure what's hotter, Ana. Your offer to suck me off, kinky fuckery, or your broken pussy. I can vouch for it though, it's not broken. I'll prove it when we go to my playroom, and I promise, you'll like it. It'll be the best kinky fuckery ever."

I giggled. "Christian, my God. I'm wet again. I'm always wet around you."

"Just the way I like you," he responded. He got up and reached his hand towards me. "If if makes you feel any better, I'm always hard around you. Just look at this tent in my boxers. Come on."

"Christian, where are those sweats I was wearing earlier? And where are we going?" I asked as I got up to follow him.

He took my hand and led me out of the room and down the hall. "We're going to my office, and you don't need the sweats. Look at me, Ana, I'm not wearing a shirt. It's the middle of the afternoon, and I'm only wearing boxers. This is another first. Do you realize that you're the first woman other than Mom and Mia who has ever seen me without a shirt on? I don't even swim without a shirt."

"Really? I didn't know," I responded. "So you never take off your shirt when you... have sex?" I asked.

Christian turned and smirked at me. "I do now," he said. He led me into his office. "Sit here," he said, motioning towards a couch. He walked over to a wet bar and poured two shot glasses full of amber liquid. He brought me one and said, "Brandy."

I sipped it. "Wow, this is good," I said.

"Mmm hmm," was all he responded. He looked distracted as he looked through some papers on his desk. Finally he looked up at me. "Our contract is going to require some... changes. I started working on it after I came home from the munch, when I couldn't sleep. But I've learned a lot about you since then, so I think I'd rather start over from scratch. Here's a copy of a standard contract. It was how I always started with a new sub. She would read it, and then we'd make whatever changes we needed to. But... well, you'll see. There's so much here that just... doesn't apply to you."

Christian looked so nervous all of a sudden, which made me nervous. I picked up the paper that he held towards me, wondering if it was about to change my life.


	14. Chapter 14: The Contract (APOV)

**Chapter 14: The Contract** _(Anastasia's POV)_

I picked up the contract and started to read it. I was curious not only about the contract but also about why Christian seemed so nervous all of a sudden.

 _CONTRACT_

 _Made this day_ of 2016 ("The Commencement Date")_

 _THE PARTIES AGREE AS FOLLOWS_

 _The following are the terms of a binding contract between the Dominant and the Submissive._

 _FUNDAMENTAL TERMS_

 _1\. The fundamental purpose of this contract is to allow the Submissive to explore her sensuality and her limits safely, with due respect and regard for her needs, her limits and her wellbeing._

 _2\. The Dominant and the Submissive agree and acknowledge that all that occurs under the terms of this contract will be consensual, confidential, and subject to the agreed limits and safety procedures set out in this contract. Additional limits and safety procedures may be agreed in writing._

 _3\. The Dominant and the Submissive each warrant that they suffer from no sexual, serious, infectious or life-threatening illnesses. If during the Term (as defined below) or any extended term of this contract either party should be diagnosed with or become aware of any such illness he or she undertakes to inform the other immediately and in any event prior to any form of physical contact between the parties._

 _4\. Adherence to the above warranties, agreements and undertakings (and any additional limits and safety procedures agreed under clause 2 above) are fundamental to this contract. Any breach shall render it void with immediate effect and each party agrees to be fully responsible to the other for the consequence of any breach._

 _5\. Everything in this contract must be read and interpreted in the light of the fundamental purpose and the fundamental terms set out in clauses 3-4 above._

I took a break from reading, looked at Christian, who was watching me nervously, and said, "So far, this seems pretty standard. Nothing here that doesn't seem to apply to me, as you said."

"Keep reading," he replied.

"OK, but only if you relax," I agreed.

He took a deep breath, followed by a drink of brandy.

"Why are you so nervous, Christian?" I asked. "You know I'm going to sign it."

"We'll change anything you don't like," he responded.

"OK," I said. "I'll let you know." And I went back to reading.

 _ROLES_

 _6\. The Dominant shall take responsibility for the wellbeing and the proper training, guidance, and discipline of the Submissive. He shall decide the nature of such training, guidance, and discipline and the time and place of its administration, subject to the agreed terms, limitations and safety procedures set out in this contract or agreed additionally under clause 2 above._

 _7\. If at any time the Dominant should fail to keep to the agreed terms, limitations and safety procedures set out in this contract or agreed additionally under clause 2 above the Submissive is entitled to terminate this contract forthwith and to leave the service of the Dominant without notice._

 _8\. Subject to that proviso and to clauses 3-6 above the Submissive is to serve and obey the Dominant in all things. Subject to the agreed terms, limitations and safety procedures set out in this contract or agreed additionally under clause 2 above she shall without query or hesitation offer the Dominant such pleasure as he may require and she shall accept without query or hesitation his training, guidance and discipline in whatever form it may take._

"OK, so far so good," I said. "Just one question about Clause 8. What do you mean that I am to obey you 'in all things'? This just applies to the playroom, right?"

Christian hesitated before he answered, "With you, yes. We can add that to Clause 8." He looked at his computer, and typed as he spoke, '... in all things in the playroom.' And then again at the end, 'in whatever form it may take while they are in the playroom.' He looked up at me and asked, "Do you want to attend more play parties? Should we add that to the clause?"

"Umm... I don't know, Christian," I answered honestly. "What do you want?"

"I'm not sure either. I know that I didn't enjoy knowing other Doms were ogling you last night. I prefer to keep you to myself."

"I'm still worried about being seen there, and word getting out," I confessed.

"Well, how about this," he suggested. "How about we just cross that bridge when we come to it. If we decide together to attend another party, the same rules will apply as in the playroom."

"Agreed," I said. "I don't think we have to put that in the contract. It isn't necessary."

"Good," he agreed. "Now... I think we're getting to the part that needs a lot of changes."

I looked back at the contract and continued to read.

 _COMMENCEMENT AND TERM_

 _9\. The Dominant and Submissive enter into this contract on The Commencement Date fully aware of its nature and undertake to abide by its conditions without exception._

 _10\. This contract shall be effective for a period of three Calendar Months from The Commencement Date ("The Term"). On the expiry of The Term the parties shall discuss whether this contract and the arrangements they have made under this contract are satisfactory and whether the needs of each party have been met. Either party may propose the extension of this contract subject to adjustments to its terms, or to the arrangements they have made under it. In the absence of agreement to such extension this contract shall terminate and both parties shall be free to resume their lives separately._

I looked up at Christian and asked, "Didn't you say you wanted to do six months?"

"I did say that," he answered. "Do you agree to six months? It can be terminated at any time, of course."

"Yes, six months," I said, and I continued to read as he made the changes.

 _AVAILABILITY_

 _11\. The Submissive will make herself available to the Dominant from Friday evenings through to Sunday afternoons each week during the Term at times to be specified by the Dominant ("the Allotted Times"). Further allocated time can be mutually agreed on an ad hoc basis._

 _12\. The Dominant reserves the right to dismiss the Submissive from his service at any time and for any reason. The Submissive may request her release at any time, such request to be granted at the discretion of the Dominant subject only to the Submissive's rights under clauses 3-6 and 9 above._

I looked up at Christian feeling a little confused. "What will this mean for us?" I asked. If I'm 'available to you' from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon, do you mean you want me to be your submissive in the playroom that whole time? Or will we go out?

"Yeah, this is what I was referring to. Everything is different with you, Ana. You're more than a sub. My submissives spent the entire weekend here. Even if I went out, they stayed here, in their room upstairs. Or sometimes, I left them restrained in the playroom, if I was punishing them."

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," he answered. "And they obeyed me all the time, not just in the playroom. I was only their Dom. Nothing more. But now... you're not only my sub. You're my girlfriend too. We've agreed to that. I don't know how to do that, Ana. I've never done it before. It seems like... there are things we can't put in a contract."

"It seems so," I agreed. "So... when do you want me to be... available?"

"Honestly, Ana? All the time. 24-7."

"You want me to move in with you?" I asked incredulously.

Christian smiled, finally. "Well, I admit it's probably a little too early for that, even though I like the idea. But I would like for you to consider the idea of putting in a door to connect our homes. It's not something to put in a contract. Just something to think about."

"I will think about it, Christian. I like the idea too. How soon do you think Elliot could do it?"

"He could do it this week if you want him to," Christian answered.

"OK," I said.

"OK?" he asked.

"Yes," I affirmed. "Will he be at your parents' house tomorrow?"

"He should. He always is. You want to ask him then? Because I can call him..."

"No, let's ask him tomorrow in person," I said. "If that's OK."

"That's OK," he said.

"So... what about this contract? How often...? Would you like to go to the playroom a certain number of times per week? It doesn't have to be just a weekend thing, although both of us are incredibly busy, especially during the week. But it could be a good stress relief."

"How about at least twice a week in the playroom?" Christian suggested. "Of course I want to see you more often than that. I want to fuck you more often than that, but I want you in my bed sometimes, and we don't need to put that in the contract, because you won't be my sub when you're in my bedroom."

"Right," I responded. "I'm also wondering... Christian, are you going to miss having TPE with your subs? Because I'm open to doing that... for a weekend or something." I felt embarrassed, so I started rambling. "I don't mean every weekend, like you had with them. I couldn't do that and keep up with business, and I can't do any work if I'm doing TPE. And I couldn't do it anytime soon either because of all the shit going on. If Jack does turn out to be my mole, I'm going to be without a COO. I'm going to need to do some work, even on the weekends. Today has been wonderful, but I'm sure I'm going to pay for it. I haven't gone a day without checking work email in five years, and I'm..."

Christian stopped me with a passionate kiss, which lasted a couple of minutes before he looked in my eyes and said, "You are perfect. Have I told you that yet? Fucking perfect, Ana. But... you really know how to take me off guard. I didn't expect you to even know what TPE is. Just to be clear, what do you think it is?"

I wanted to roll my eyes, but I refrained. "Christian, I told you I've studied BDSM for several years, and Total Power Exchange is one of the basics. It's what you had with all your other subs. You controlled them all the time. And I've made it clear that you can't control me outside of sex. So that's why you've made it clear that I only submit to you when I'm collared. And you only collar me when we're going to a play party or into the playroom. But what I'm saying is that from time to time, we can... prolong that... if you like. But it has to be a time when I can clear my schedule of everything else so I can give you 100% of my time and attention. Would you like that?"

Christian snorted. "Would I like that? Are you serious? Anastasia, you have no idea how much I would fucking like that. Do you have any idea what you do to me? Baby, I run a Fortune 500 company too. I know exactly what you're offering to give up for me."

"Only for a weekend," I clarified.

"I realize that," he said. "But I realize how valuable that is."

"So... do you want to put something about that in the contract?" I asked.

He cleared his throat. "Do you think you could do once a month? Is that too often for you to give up a whole weekend?"

I considered it for a moment. "In theory, it sounds very doable. In fact, I think it will be great for me both mentally and spiritually to have that extended time of giving up control. The only thing is... I have no idea how messy things are about to get at Ismintis. And as long as things are... messy... I don't know if I'll be able to do it."

Christian considered that for a moment, and then he suggested, "How about we put in the contract that we will do one weekend of TPE per month. Then, a month from now, if things are still too messy for you to be able to do it, we'll revise the contract. But I don't think it's going to take you that long to flush out your mole."

"I hope you're right," I said. "But I have this sick feeling in my gut that it's my COO. Can you imagine taking off a weekend without having Ros there to handle any issues that arise?"

"I can't imagine taking off a weekend, with or without Ros," Christian answered.

"You haven't checked your email today either," I reminded him.

"I know," he responded. "First time in... I don't even know. And my phone is downstairs. And you know what? It feels fucking good."

I looked back at the contract again. "Christian, so far I haven't read anything about collars, and it seems like this would be the logical place for it."

"My submissives didn't wear collars," he explained. "I never needed to put it in a contract. You're the first one I've ever wanted to collar."

I felt surprised again, but I shouldn't have. By now, comments like this should feel normal. "But, why?" I asked.

"The same reason I want you to call me Master instead of Sir," he explained. "It means more. I'm not sure I was even fully aware of it at the time, but... as much as I wanted all of them to obey me and submit to me... I never really wanted them to _belong_ to me. They were mine to play with on the weekends. It was like a hobby, and it's how I got my sexual release. But you're something else altogether. You are mine, Anastasia. You belong to me. The collar signifies that. It's just as much a contract as this paper is."

I smiled at him to let him know I understood. "Christian," I said, "I'm just as much yours when I'm not wearing the collar as I am when I am wearing it. The only difference is that I won't let you control me when I'm not wearing it. But I belong to you. Even before we sign this paper, I already know that. It's something that I want. I've known it since last night. You had to earn my trust, but you have it now."

Christian stared at me for a minute before responding. "I belong to you too, Ana. That's another first. I've never felt that I belonged to anyone, not even fucking Elena. I guess you've earned my trust too. Keep that in mind when I collar you, Ana. It's my collar. It means that I belong to you just as much as you do to me."

"So, Christian..." I began, but I wasn't sure how he'd feel about what I was about to say, so I hesitated. "Do we really need this contract? I'm not sure it's necessary."

He thought about it for a moment. I was glad he didn't seem offended or angry. "Probably not, but we do need to finish reading it and discussing it. Maybe sign it as a formality. Even if we thought we needed it, it wouldn't be enforceable, but it helps us know each other's limits. That's the main reason I want to finish it. I need to know, Anastasia, before we go into the play room."

"OK, I see," I agreed. Then I kept reading the contract.

 _LOCATION_

 _13\. The Submissive will make herself available during the Allotted Times and agreed additional times at locations to be determined by the Dominant. The Dominant will ensure that all travel costs incurred by the Submissive for that purpose are met by the Dominant._

"It kind of goes without saying, doesn't it?" I asked.

"Yeah, I don't think we need Clause 13 for you," he agreed. "We can strike it."

"Agreed," I said as I looked back at the contract.

 _SERVICE PROVISIONS_

 _14\. The following service provisions have been discussed and agreed and will be adhered to by both parties during the Term. Both parties accept that certain matters may arise which are not covered by the terms of this contract or the service provisions, or that certain matters may be renegotiated. In such circumstance further clauses may be proposed by way of amendment. Any further clauses or amendments must be agreed, documented and signed by both parties and shall be subject to the fundamental terms set out at clauses 2-5 above._

 _DOMINANT_

 _14.1 The Dominant shall make the Submissive's health and safety a priority at all times. The Dominant shall not at any time require, request, allow or demand the Submissive to participate at the hands of the Dominant in the activities detailed in Appendix 2 or in any act that either party deems to be unsafe. The Dominant will not undertake or permit to be undertaken any action which could cause serious injury or any risk to the Submissive's life._

 _14.2 The Dominant accepts the Submissive as his, to own, control, dominate and discipline during the Term. The Dominant may use the Submissive's body at any time during the Allotted Times or any agreed additional times in any manner he deems fit, sexually or otherwise._

 _14.3 The Dominant shall provide the Submissive with all necessary training and guidance in how to properly serve the Dominant._

 _14.4 The Dominant shall maintain a stable and safe environment in which the Submissive may perform her duties in service of the Dominant._

 _14.5 The Dominant may discipline the Submissive as necessary to ensure the Submissive fully appreciates her role of subservience to the Dominant and to discourage unacceptable conduct. The Dominant may flog, spank, whip or corporally punish the Submissive as he sees fit, for purposes of discipline, for his own personal enjoyment, or for any other reason, which he is not obliged to provide._

 _14.6 In training and in the administration of discipline the Dominant shall ensure that no permanent marks are made upon the Submissive's body nor any injuries incurred that may require medical attention._

 _14.7 In training and in the administration of discipline the Dominant shall ensure that the discipline and the instruments used for the purposes of discipline are safe, shall not be used in such a way as to cause serious harm and shall not in any way exceed the limits defined and detailed in this contract._

 _14.8 In case of illness or injury the Dominant shall care for the Submissive, seeing to her health and safety, encouraging and when necessary ordering medical attention when it is judged necessary by the Dominant._

 _14.9 The Dominant shall maintain his own good health and seek medical attention when necessary in order to maintain a risk-free environment._

 _14.10 The Dominant shall not loan his Submissive to another Dominant._

 _14.11 The Dominant may restrain, handcuff, or bind the Submissive at any time during the Allotted Times or any agreed additional times for any reason and for extended periods of time, giving due regard to the health and safety of the Submissive._

 _14.12 The Dominant will ensure that all equipment used for the purposes of training and discipline shall be maintained in a clean, hygienic and safe state at all times._

"I agree to all of this," I said as I looked up at Christian. "Oh, and just so you know, 14.2 really turns me on."

"I thought it was 14.11 that got you wet every time," Christian commented dryly.

"That too," I agreed, with a smirk.

 _SUBMISSIVE_

 _14.13 The Submissive accepts the Dominant as her master, with the understanding that she is now the property of the Dominant, to be dealt with as the Dominant pleases during the Term generally but specifically during the Allotted Times and any additional agreed allotted times._

 _14.14 The Submissive shall obey the rules ("the Rules") set out in Appendix 1 to this agreement._

 _14.15 The Submissive shall serve the Dominant in any way the Dominant sees fit and shall endeavor to please the Dominant at all times to the best of her ability._

 _14.16 The Submissive shall take all measures necessary to maintain her good health and shall request or seek medical attention whenever it is needed, keeping the Dominant informed at all times of any health issues that may arise._

 _14.17 The Submissive will ensure that she procures oral contraception and ensure that she takes it as and when prescribed to prevent any pregnancy._

"Is clause 14.17 necessary," I asked. "You know I have an IUD."

"You're right, it's not necessary," Christian answered. "I'll strike it."

 _14.18 The Submissive shall accept without question any and all disciplinary actions deemed necessary by the Dominant and remember her status and role in regard to the Dominant at all times._

 _14.19 The Submissive shall not touch or pleasure herself sexually without permission from the Dominant._

"What?!" I exclaimed. "No pleasuring myself? Seriously, Christian?"

"Seriously, Ana," he responded firmly. "I want to own all of your pleasure. I want to give you all of your orgasms. No masturbating, unless you're doing it in front of me, at my command."

"OK, I'll agree to this, just to make you happy, and because I am sure that I'm not going to be going very long without an orgasm if I spend any time around you at all. But I just want to say... we're beginning to blur some lines here. If I'm only your submissive when I'm wearing your collar, I shouldn't need to obey you any other time.

Christian sighed. "I only want you to obey me when it comes to sex. And masturbation is sex."

"OK, Christian. I agree to it," I said.

 _14.20 The Submissive shall submit to any sexual activity demanded by the Dominant and shall do without hesitation or argument._

 _14.21 The Submissive shall accept whippings, floggings, spankings, caning, paddling or any other discipline the Dominant should decide to administer, without hesitation, enquiry or complaint._

 _14.22 The Submissive shall not look directly into the eyes of the Dominant except when specifically instructed to do so. The Submissive shall keep her eyes cast down and maintain a quiet and respectful bearing in the presence of the Dominant._

"You want to change 14.22, don't you?" I asked.

"Yes," Christian replied. "Although... I don't want to completely change it. To be honest, when I walked in your living room last night, and you had your eyes averted, it really turned me on. I like that. I'd like you to still keep your eyes downcast when we're in a scene, and to remain quiet and respectful. But I'll add a clause here about you looking in my eyes when you come."

"OK, that's fine with me," I replied.

 _14.23 The Submissive shall always conduct herself in a respectful manner to the Dominant and shall address him only as Sir, Mr. Grey, or such other title as the Dominant may direct._

"You also want to change 14.23, don't you?" I asked. "You don't want me to call you Sir or Mr. Grey. Just Master. Right?"

"Right," he replied. "Do you know the significance?"

"I do," I replied. "I've done my research, Christian. I know that calling you Master goes beyond showing you respect as my Dom. It means that I belong to you. And that's exactly what I want. Like wearing your collar."

"That's good, Ana," he said. "And before you say it, we're changing the next clause too.

I looked down and read it.

 _14.24 The Submissive will not touch the Dominant without his express permission to do so._

"Are you sure, Christian?" I asked. "I mean, whether it's in the contract or not, I'll always be careful about where I touch you. And I like the idea of touching you in places that don't hurt you... when we're outside the playroom. But in the playroom... will you be comfortable? None of your other subs ever touched you, right?"

Christian thought about it for a moment. "OK, you're right. Let's keep it there, but touch me anytime, Ana. And touch me in the playroom too so I'll have a good excuse to punish you."

"You'd like that, wouldn't you?" I joked.

"More than you realize," he answered.

"Wasn't that why you said you ended Leila's contract?" I asked. "Because she kept touching you?"

Christian smiled at me, but he looked sad. "First of all, she did more than just touch me. And second of all, you're not Leila, and I'll never end your contract for any reason. Now keep reading."

I was too shocked by his words to respond, so I obeyed.

 _ACTIVITIES_

 _15\. The Submissive shall not participate in activities or any sexual acts that either party deems to be unsafe or any activities detailed in Appendix 2._

 _16\. The Dominant and the Submissive have discussed the activities set out in Appendix 3 and recorded in writing on Appendix 3 their agreement in respect of them._

 _SAFEWORDS_

 _17\. The Dominant and the Submissive recognize that the Dominant may make demands of the Submissive that cannot be met without incurring physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, or other harm at the time the demands are made to the Submissive. In such circumstances related to this, the Submissive may make use of a safeword. Two Safewords will be invoked depending on the severity of the demands._

 _18\. The Safeword "Yellow" will be used to bring to the attention of the Dominant that the Submissive is close to her limit of endurance._

 _19\. The Safeword "Red" will be used to bring to the attention of the Dominant that the Submissive cannot tolerate any further demands. When this word is said the Dominant's action will cease completely with immediate effect._

 _CONCLUSION_

 _20\. We the undersigned have read and understood fully the provisions of this contract. We freely accept the terms of this contract and have acknowledged this by our signatures below._

 _The Dominant: Christian Grey_

 _Date_

 _The Submissive: Anastasia Steele_

 _Date_

"I see you already added our names," I said.

Christian nodded. "Yes, so I'll just print out a copy for each of us once we've finished making changes. I know you're going to want to change a lot of things in the Appendices."

"How do you know?" I asked. "We haven't needed to change much so far."

"Just trust me," Christian replied, sounding a little nervous again. "And again, we can change anything you want to there. Let's just discuss it first."

I turned the page and began to read again.

 _APPENDIX 1_

 _RULES_

 _Obedience:_

 _* The Submissive will obey any instructions given by the Dominant immediately without hesitation or reservation and in an expeditious manner. The Submissive will agree to any sexual activity deemed fit and pleasurable by the Dominant excepting those activities which are outlined in hard limits (Appendix 2). She will do so eagerly and without hesitation._

"This seems redundant," I said. "It's already in the contract that I'll obey you in the playroom. I'm not agreeing to obey you outside of the playroom."

"We'll strike it. My other subs obeyed me in everything. And you're right, it was redundant. I wanted to make sure they got the message."

"OK, so Obedience is stricken from the rules?" I asked.

"Yes, consider it gone," he replied. "But you'll obey me without question in the playroom. And in anything concerning Elena Lincoln."

"Yes, I will," I promised.

 _Sleep:_

 _* The Submissive will ensure she achieves a minimum of eight hours sleep a night when she is not with the Dominant._

"Sleep? Seriously?" I asked. "You want to control how much I sleep? I've already told you how much I normally sleep. I seem to recall it being one of the topics we discussed at the Zig Zag before our faces got plastered in every tabloid in the country."

"You're right. It's not necessary. I'm striking it too."

"Good," I said.

 _Food:_

 _* The Submissive will eat regularly to maintain her health and wellbeing from a prescribed list of foods (Appendix 4). The Submissive will not snack between meals, with the exception of fruit._

"Food? You've got to be kidding, Christian. You had a list of prescribed foods?"

"Yes, I did, and they had to follow it all the time," he answered.

"Christian, I don't even want to look at Appendix 4," I said.

Christian responded by taking the contract from my hands, turning over to Appendix 4, removing those pages, and putting them in the shredder. Then he pressed some keys on his computer, and I knew he was deleting Appendix 4 from the contract. "Appendix 4 is now history. I know you eat healthy. You've told me. So... I'm going to trust you to keep eating healthy. This is important to me, Ana. There are things about my past that I haven't told you about yet. Just promise me that you'll always eat properly. If you make me that promise, we'll leave everything about food out of the contract."

"I promise, Christian," I said.

He kept his eyes on the computer screen and said, "Done."

 _Clothes:_

 _* During the Term the Submissive will wear clothing only approved by the Dominant. The Dominant will provide a clothing budget for the Submissive, which the Submissive shall utilize. The Dominant shall accompany the Submissive to purchase clothing on an ad hoc basis. If the Dominant so requires the Submissive shall during the Term wear adornments the Dominant shall require, in the presence of the Dominant and any other time the Dominant deems fit._

Before I had a chance to say anything, Christian said, "We can remove the clothing clause too. You don't need it. None of my former subs had the wealth you have. They liked this part of the contract, but I have a feeling you don't.

"You're right. I can dress myself."

"You can. And in the playroom, you won't need any clothes. But... will you do something for me?"

"That depends," I answered. "What?"

"Get rid of those fucking glasses that you don't need. And wear your hair down when we go out in public. And buy some sexy dresses for when we go out."

"You sound like you want to be seen in public with me, Mr. Grey," I said flirtatiously.

"That's because I do, Miss Steele. I want to show you off."

I smiled. "OK, Christian. The glasses have achieved their purpose. I'll retire them. I'll keep the rest of my business attire as it is. But I'll start dressing for you when we go out."

He smiled at me. "If it weren't for the crazy paparazzi out there, I'd take you out tonight."

"Nope, we have a date in your playroom tonight," I reminded him.

"Mmm hmm, so finish the contract."

 _Exercise:_

 _* The Dominant shall provide the Submissive with a personal trainer four times a week in hour-long sessions at times to be mutually agreed between the personal trainer and the Submissive. The personal trainer will report to the Dominant on the Submissive's progress._

"Wow, a personal trainer, too? You didn't hold back with your subs, did you? I might actually take you up on this one."

"You don't need it," Christian said. "I'm beginning to think we can get rid of all of Appendix 1. But finish reading it before we decide that. And for the record, if you want a personal trainer, I'll get you one. It doesn't need to be in our contract."

"I'll think about it," I said.

 _Personal Hygiene/Beauty:_

 _* The Submissive will keep herself clean and shaved and/or waxed at all times. The Submissive will visit a beauty salon of the Dominant's choosing at times to be decided by the Dominant, and undergo whatever treatments the Dominant sees fit. All costs will be met by the Dominant._

"I sure as hell am not going to visit Esclava. Is that where your submissives took care of their personal hygiene and beauty needs?"

"Like you have to ask?" he answered sarcastically. "Of course it was. Except for the last two, who I met at play parties. They used a different salon."

"Of course they did," I said dryly

"You don't need this either, do you?"

"No, but you can give me a spa day anytime you want to," I joked.

"I will," he answered.

 _Personal Safety:_

 _* The Submissive will not drink to excess, smoke, take recreational drugs or put herself in any unnecessary danger._

 _Personal Qualities:_

 _* The Submissive will not enter into any sexual relations with anyone other than the Dominant. The Submissive will conduct herself in a respectful and modest manner at all times. She must recognize that her behavior is a direct reflection on the Dominant. She shall be held accountable for any misdeeds, wrongdoings and misbehavior committed when not in the presence of the Dominant._

 _Failure to comply with any of the above will result in immediate punishment, the nature of which shall be determined by the Dominant._

"Christian, I think I agree with you that we don't need anything in Appendix 1. I sure as hell won't have sex with anyone else. You should trust me with that. It doesn't need to be in a contract. I trust you too, even though there's nothing here that says you won't have sex with another submissive. But I believe you will be faithful to me, as I will to you. We don't need any of these rules. Are you OK with that?"

"I'm actually OK with that, surprisingly," he answered. He seemed shocked at himself. "I didn't expect I'd ever have a contract without rules. It seems crazy. But none of these seem appropriate or necessary for you. Either they don't apply or they go without saying."

"Good, I'm glad you agree. I don't like living with a list of rules. You know I'll obey you in the playroom. That should be enough."

Christian seemed much more relaxed now. "OK, the next part is really important," he said. "I already know a lot of it, but there are still things there I need to know."

 _APPENDIX 2_

 _Hard Limits_

 _* No acts involving fire play_

 _* No acts involving urination or defecation and the products thereof_

 _* No acts involving needles, knives, cutting, piercing, or blood_

 _* No acts involving gynecological medical instruments_

 _* No acts involving children or animals_

 _* No acts that will leave any permanent marks on the skin_

 _* No acts involving breath control._

 _* No activity that involves the direct contact of electric current (whether alternating or direct), fire or flames to the body._

I glanced up at him. "Well, that's a short list. And I agree with everything. I sure as hell don't want you doing any of these things."

"I won't. OK, agreed," he said. "Now, on to soft limits."

I looked at Appendix 3, at the Soft Limits, and began to read out loud. "Which of the following sexual acts are acceptable to the Submissive? Masturbation, yes. Fellatio, yes, you know it. Cunnilingus, yes, please. Vaginal intercourse, yes. Vaginal fisting... Umm. What? Is that what it sounds like?"

Christian sniggered. "Yes, fucking you with my fist."

"No, Christian. Just no. I don't... That doesn't sound pleasant."

"We'll strike it," he responded.

"OK, anal intercourse, yes. Anal fisting... again, absolutely not."

"I've already deleted it," Christian said.

"Is swallowing semen acceptable to the Submissive? Yes, you know it. Is the use of sex toys acceptable to the Submissive? Absolutely, yes. And that includes all the ones on the list: vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, and anything else you want to use."

"So you did like the death by orgasm punishment last night?" he asked smugly.

"Up to a point," I answered. "It was a punishment. It was painful. But if I'm going to be punished... that's a good way to do it. Next question. Is Bondage acceptable to the Submissive? Yes, to all of the various ways you want to tie me up. I want it. You know that. Gagging... just make sure I can breath. Suspension... that sounds interesting."

"You want to try suspension?" he asked.

"Is it painful?" I asked.

"Not if it's done correctly. If it hurts, then something is wrong."

"OK, then. I assume you know how to do it correctly, so sure, why not? Next question. What is the Submissive's general attitude about receiving pain? I'd say somewhere in the middle. I guess a 3. How much pain does the submissive want to receive? Honestly, none at all, but I know that doesn't work for you. I'd say a 3 again."

"You're going to come to enjoy the pain," Christian said.

"So you say. It's enough that I can tolerate it. Next question. Which of the following types of pain/punishment/discipline are acceptable to the Submissive?Spanking, paddling, whipping, caning... now it's sounding really painful. I'm not sure about caning, all right?

OK, I don't need to cane you," Christian said.

"Biting? Do you want to bite me?" I asked.

Christian looked at me hungrily. "Oh yes, I want to bite you."

"Where, and how hard?" I asked.

"Do you trust me?" he asked. "I won't make you bleed."

"Yes," I replied without hesitation. "I trust you. You can leave biting in there. You can keep nipple clamps too, but I'm not sure about genital clamps. That sounds painful. I don't want them."

"OK, no genital clamps," Christian said.

"Yes to ice and hot wax," I said. "And that's everything, right?"

"That's everything," he replied. "We're finished."

"I must say, this is the most... interesting... contract I've ever read. And I've never had a negotiation quite like this one, Mr. Grey."

"Well, Ms. Steele, I am one of a kind."

"That you are, but I just realized something. There's nothing about eye rolling in this contract. So what's your deal with that?"

"It may not be there per say, but I don't like it. And you agree to please me. See clause 14.15? 'The Submissive shall serve the Dominant in any way the Dominant sees fit and shall endeavor to please the Dominant at all times to the best of her ability.'"

"Yes, Christian, but you threaten to punish me anytime I roll my eyes, not just when I'm wearing your collar," I argued.

"Because I don't like it. It's rude," he insisted.

"So I guess what we need to get clear... What happens when I do something outside of the play room that you don't like? Will you punish me when we go to the play room for something I did outside the play room? And how will that work if we don't have rules outside of the play room?"

"Fuck!" he exclaimed. "Damn it, Ana, why do you have to complicate everything?"

"I won't let you control me outside of sex, Christian. That's a hard limit," I insisted.

Christian looked like he was in pain. "Ana, I know I agreed that we don't need Appendix 1, but I don't know if I can live without rules. I'm not saying that I won't try, just that I don't know how. I've never done this before."

"It'll be OK, Christian. You said it yourself, that I would begin to like punishments so much that I do things just to get you to punish me. I don't mind if you punish me for eye rolling, or anything else I do that you think is punishable, even if I do it when I'm not in sub mode. As long as it's just little things like eye rolling, and you're not trying to control my life, but I think you're smart enough to know better than to try to control me outside of our sex life. You know better than to try to fuck with my business life. It all comes down to this: I trust you. I know that you'll never hurt me."

Christian gazed at me for a minute before he responded, "I will never hurt you. We don't even have to sign this contract, Ana. I've done so much with you already without a contract. It isn't necessary."

"I want to, Christian," I said. "If for no other reason than the symbolism behind it. I want to show you, in black and white, that I'm submitting to you sexually. Print it out, Christian. I'm ready to sign it."

Christian did as I asked without speaking, and we both signed it. I felt a wave of excitement as I handed the pen back to him.

"Are you ready to go to my playroom?" he asked seductively.

"I'm ready," I answered.


	15. Chapter 15: The Playroom (APOV)

**Chapter 15: The Playroom** ( _Anastasia's POV)_

Christian took my hand and led me upstairs, past a few doors. I could feel his excitement, even though he was trying to disguise it with his Dom persona. At the end of the hall, he stopped, took out a key, turned to me, and said, "Remember your safe words. Don't be afraid to use them." He turned back to the door and unlocked it. "After you," he said, and I walked through the door.

The atmosphere was very different than the play party had been. It was quiet in here, relaxed, warm. The walls were a dark red, almost womb-like. A St. Andrews cross dominated the wall to the right, while a giant grid took up the left side of the room. An oversized bed dominated the center of the room, and it was covered with satiny red sheets. There were other contraptions... I wasn't sure what everything was. I recognized a spanking bench. There were shackles and attachments for ropes or chains everywhere... the bed, the walls, the ceiling. There was an ornate chest of drawers where I guessed Christian kept his toys.

Christian noticed me looking around at everything, and I'm sure he also saw how hard my nipples had gotten. He said nothing as I continued to look around, and I could hear him open and close the drawers. He approached me, and without speaking, put the collar around my neck.

"I think you like my playroom, don't you, princess?" he finally said.

"Yes, Master. I like it a lot."

"Take off that t-shirt," he commanded. "I want to see your nipples."

I obeyed him without speaking, folded the shirt, and placed it on the floor. I stood before him totally nude.

He immediately leaned towards me and whispered. "Close your eyes, princess. Keep them closed and don't move." He then started licking my nipple with just his tongue. He kept his lips away, teasing me, and he didn't touch me with his hands. Only his tongue touched only my one nipple. It was tortuous as he went from light licks with the tip of his tongue to laving it with his whole tongue, and then back to light licks again. After what felt like an hour, he moved to the other nipple, still not touching me anywhere else. My clit was throbbing. He paid that nipple the same attention that he had the first one, and then, all of a sudden, he bit it, hard.

"Ouch! Oh, shit!" I cried out as my eyes flew open.

Christian responded by smacking me hard on the ass. "I told you to keep your eyes closed. And you know you aren't allowed to speak."

"I'm sorry, Master," I said. "But that was... unexpected."

"Hush," he said. "You must be prepared for anything in here. Now close your eyes again, and keep them closed this time."

When I obeyed him, he sucked the nipple that he had just bitten into his mouth. He pinched and tweaked the other one, and after a couple of minutes, he switched to sucking it and pinching and tweaking the other one. Then, suddenly I felt a sharp pinch on first one and then the other nipple. This was followed by a tugging sensation at each nipple. I wanted to open my eyes to see what he was doing, but I knew that I had to keep them closed. After a moment, I heard and felt him step away from me. Then, there was silence. I kept my eyes closed, and I listened closely to try to figure out what he was doing. My nipples still felt... heavy. And my clit was still throbbing.

"Open your eyes," Christian commanded from across the room. When I obeyed, I was careful not to look at him, but I could see him out of the corner of my eye. He was standing there, gloriously naked, watching me. I glanced down at my nipples and saw that he had attached nipple clamps. These were different than the ones he had used at the play party. They had jewels that weighted them down, making them tug on my nipples if I moved at all.

"Look at me," Christian commanded. My God, he was hot, standing there with that feral look in his eyes, looking hungrily at me, walking predatorily towards me. When he got close enough to touch me, he said, "Kneel."

Without taking my eyes from his, I lowered myself to my knees and got into a submissive position.

Christian explained, "Sometimes when I ask you to come in here, I will ask you to wait for me, just like this, Anastasia. If I tell you to meet me in the playroom, this is exactly how I expect to find you when I enter that door. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master," I answered.

"There is a bathroom through that door right there," Christian said as he pointed towards a door. "In the future, you may get undressed and leave your clothes there. You should never wear anything in this room unless I tell you otherwise. Not a scrap."

"Yes, Master," I replied.

Christian rubbed his cock against my cheek. "I've been thinking about that blowjob you gave me in your house yesterday. Open up and do it again."

I began by licking his tip before I put my mouth around just his head and sucked gently, the way I knew he liked it. Then, I licked up and down his shaft a few times before I took all of him into my mouth and down my throat. I knew what it would do to him for me to swallow. So I did, twice. At that, Christian began to fuck my mouth furiously, but after only a few seconds, he pulled away.

"Stand up and come here," Christian commanded. He strode across the room to the grid, and I followed him obediently. "Lift your arms over your head," he ordered me. When I obeyed, he took some padded cuffs from his back pocket, cuffed my wrists together, and attached them to the the grid. Then he adjusted the straps so that I had to stand on my tiptoes just as I had at the play party. Once he had me how he wanted me, Christian stood back and looked at me. "You are so beautiful, Anastasia. And your breasts... I love how they're on display for me right now. Those are real diamonds on your clamps. I bought them just for you. You should always be adorned in diamonds."

I wasn't sure whether I should thank him or remain silent. I decided to remain silent.

"Do you enjoy sucking my cock, princess?" he asked.

"Yes, Master, you know I do," I answered.

"Do you like your nipple clamps?" he asked.

I hesitated. "Yes, Master. They're beautiful."

He smacked my ass, hard. "Be honest with me when I ask you a question. Why did you hesitate?"

I hesitated again. "I do like them, Master. I do think they're beautiful. But... they also hurt a little. More than the other ones did."

"Too much?" he asked. "Do you need to safe word?"

"No, Master," I answered. "Not too much. Just... different. I don't mind them, especially if they please you."

He smiled. "They do. You look hot as hell right now. But just to warn you... they'll hurt more when I remove them. But then I think you'll like how your tits feel after that."

"Thanks for the warning, Master," I said.

"You're welcome, princess. I'm happy you want to please me. And believe me, that blowjob pleased me. You give the best head I've ever had, by far. But I suspect you enjoyed giving it almost as much as I enjoyed receiving it. In fact, you wanted to swallow my cum again, didn't you, princess?"

"Yes, Master," I answered. "I was disappointed when you pulled away."

"Well, I couldn't allow you to make me lose control, like last time," he explained.

I wasn't sure how to respond to that, so I remained silent.

"We're both in this lifestyle because of control. I like to take it, and you like to give it. And never vice versa. Isn't that right, princess?"

"Yes, Master, absolutely," I answered. "I don't want to control you. I'm sorry if..."

"Shhh," he said as he put his hand over my lips. Then he traced my lips with his index finger as he said, "Don't apologize, princess. Now, be silent." From his pocket, he took out a strip of black satin. A blindfold, I realized. He slipped it around my head and tied it in place. "Remember this, Anastasia. You are not to come while you're blindfolded unless I tell you otherwise. I always want to see you when you come. Anytime you're blindfolded, no matter what I'm doing, you are to hold it back. If you understand, let me hear you say it."

"I understand, Master. I... I'll try not to come when I'm wearing a blindfold."

"You'll do more than try," he said sternly. "If you come without permission, I will punish you. Don't forget."

"Yes, Master. I won't forget," I responded.

"Good girl," he said. "Now, no more speaking."

Then, I heard him retreat to the other side of the room. After a moment, the music started... soft, almost reverent music. In a minute or two, I could feel his presence back in front of me. For a few moments, nothing happened, but I could feel him standing there, looking at me. And then I felt him. First, something soft touched the side of my face. Then my breast, and then it trailed down my side.

"Wha..." I started to speak.

"Shh..." he stopped me. "I told you that you are not allowed to speak, unless it's to safe word. But I don't think you'll be safe wording during this scene. I should punish you for speaking without permission, but not right now. This is for pleasure, not for punishment. But you must be silent. Otherwise, I'll gag you."

I wanted to whimper, but I managed to hold it in. The soft touches continued, and I lost track of time. I lost track of everything except the soft music and the gentle touches. Then, the music changed to something I still didn't recognize, still classical, with a slightly faster tempo. It seemed more exciting somehow. For a few moments, I couldn't feel Christian at all. But then, I felt a sting to my right breast. A moment later, I felt the same sting on my left breast. And then, I felt a series of stings on my stomach and lower abdomen. Then, he was behind me, peppering the stings to my back, butt, and thighs. Then in front of me again, covering me all over with stings, one after the other. None of them really hurt; in fact, once I got over the shock I first felt, I began to like how it felt. After a while, I also noticed that the faster the stings came, the more aroused I felt. I wondered at first what Christian was hitting me with, but I decided that it must be a flogger. I have no idea how long we were there like that, but after a while, I felt the stings on my nipples, one after the other, and I couldn't hold back a moan. Immediately, a harder sting fell across my ass, and I gasped.

"Quiet," he commanded. I nodded in response, and he resumed the strikes to my nipples. This time, I managed to hold in my moans, but barely. And then he was striking my pussy. Very quickly, I felt the orgasm building. I was going to come. Soon, and hard.

"Master, please!" I cried out.

"Shh... just a little longer. Hold it in, Anastasia. You can do it. You don't have permission yet. You're not allowed to come until I'm inside you."

After a few more strikes to my pussy, I groaned. I really didn't think I would be able to stop the orgasm that was just a breath away, and I prepared myself for whatever punishment Christian would give me. It would be worth it to ride the impending orgasm. But before I could give up and let it wash over me, I heard something hit the floor. I guessed it was the flogger, or whatever implement Christian was using. Immediately, I felt his hands on my hips, and he was moving me along the grid until I felt the cold wall behind me. At that point, Christian lifted my ass and commanded me to put my legs around him. When I did that, he removed my blindfold, but before my eyes could adjust to the soft light of the room, his lips were on mine, devouring me.

After kissing me until we were both gasping for air, Christian leaned back so he could see my face better. He said, "I'm going to fuck you now, princess. I know you're still sore, but that is what is happening. I'm going to fuck that pussy with my hard cock, and I'm not going to go easy on you, and you're going to take it like the good girl you are. And you're going to come with me like you've never come before. Let me hear you say it."

I could hear the desperation in my voice as I answered him, "Yes, Master, God, yes, please fuck me, and please give me all you've got! I need you, Master!"

And then he was inside me, pushed to the hilt, and then he was pumping furiously. He kissed me again, even more deeply, and then he was fucking my mouth with his tongue as he fucked my body mercilessly with his cock. When he finally broke the kiss so we could each take a breath, he looked me in the eyes and said, "Let it go. Come with me now."

"Christian!" I screamed out as I came gloriously at the same time that he gripped my ass, groaned loudly, and came inside me. It was the single most powerful moment of my life, and seeing how overcome he was by his own orgasm made me feel even more powerful. I did that to him. We did it to each other. And I had never felt more connected to him than I did in that moment, even earlier that morning when we had made love in his bed. I'd never seen stars like that when I came, and I wondered if Christian had seen them too.

It took a few minutes for me to come back down to life. Slowly, I realized that I was no longer standing up with my hands bound over my head, but that I was lying on the bed, in Christian's arms. He was stroking my arms and shoulders. When I was able to focus on his face, I saw that he was smirking at me. But then his face grew stern. Master was still in the room.

His voice was too calm as he asked me, "Anastasia, what did we agree about you calling me my name while you're wearing my collar?"

I groaned. "Oh, my God. I used your name. I called out your name when I came. I'm sorry, Master. I didn't mean for that to happen. It wasn't like at the play party when I used your name on purpose. This time it was an accident."

Christian looked angrier, but I wasn't sure if he was truly angry or if he was just trying to stay in character. I realized then that I saw our time in the playroom as role-playing. I wondered how he would feel if he realized that. I wondered if he felt the same way.

"Anastasia, get off the bed and kneel beside it."

I obeyed him without speaking. I knelt and bowed my head submissively.

Christian sat on the side of the bed, and it was difficult for me to avoid looking at his cock, which was at my eye level. I wanted to lean over and lick him, but I knew better. Christian looked annoyed as he spoke. "When we are in this room, you will answer my questions, and only my questions. I don't want your fucking excuses or explanations. I want the truth about what I ask you, and that's all. Now, answer the damn question."

"I'm sorry, Master," I responded. "We agreed that I am not supposed to use your name when I'm wearing your collar. I'm supposed to call you Master."

"Right," he said. "You must remember yourself. When we have sex outside of the playroom, when you aren't collared, you can use my name. I like hearing my name on your lips, especially when you come. But you must remember yourself in this room. You are a submissive in this room, not a girlfriend. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Master," I replied.

"So then you understand why I am going to punish you now?" he asked.

I caught my breath before I responded. For some reason, I suddenly felt nervous. "Yes, Master, because I disobeyed you," I answered.

"Relax, princess, I'm not going to flog you again. That was for pleasure, and we'll save a punishment flogging for another day. But I am going to punish you, and I'm going to enjoy every minute of it." Christian licked his lips before he continued, "Sometimes, punishments can be over fairly quickly, like when I spank you. Other punishments can last for hours. Like the one we're about to do. I'm going to suspend you from the ceiling, and I'm going to ravish your body while you're hanging there helpless. For hours. It's going to take me a few minutes to get things set up, so I want you to wait here. Keep your legs apart, and sit back so they don't get cramped. Keep your hands just like that, resting on your thighs. You are perfect, Anastasia. It's hard to believe you're new to this. You're a fast learner."

"Thank you, Master," I responded, keeping my eyes downcast.

Christian watched me for a moment before he turned and started getting things ready to suspend me from the ceiling. How exactly would he do that? I hadn't bothered to ask because I trusted that he knew what he was doing. I didn't have long to wait before Christian walked back over to me. "Stand up," he commanded.

I stood up and let him lead me to back to the bed, where he had several piles of rope and a harness laid out. He had already attached some rope to the rings in the ceiling. "Now, Anastasia, this punishment is not supposed to be painful, and it's very important if at any time you feel pain for you to tell me. You must use your safe word. If you ignore the pain, you could be seriously injured. Promise me that you'll tell me if you feel any pain."

"I promise, Master," I replied. I felt no fear, but only excitement.

"You told me you've been bungee jumping and sky diving, so I think it's safe to assume you aren't afraid of heights, right?" he asked.

"That's right, Master," I replied.

"Good," he responded. "If you do feel afraid, that in itself isn't enough to stop me. Confront your fear. I won't let anything happen to you. But if it hurts, you have to stop me. Got it?"

"Yes, Master, I understand," I answered.

"Good girl. Now, before we get started... stand there just like that for a minute," he said, and he strode over to the toy chest. He came back with several toys and a tube of lube.

"Stand still for me, princess. Don't move and don't speak. Not a peep." Christian moved behind me and rubbed his hands over my ass and between my cheeks. "This ass is getting closer to being ready to be fucked," he announced. "I don't think it's going to take the couple of weeks that I'd originally thought it would. I can hardly wait. But for now..." he trailed off as he grabbed the lube and a toy that I couldn't see, and knelt behind me. I felt his fingers first, sliding in and out of my ass, first one, and then two. God, I felt hot. And then I felt the toy. "This is the largest butt plug we've used so far. And in case you're wondering, yes, it does vibrate. It can be controlled using an app on my phone."

I tried really hard to be silent, but I must have let out a whimper because Christian shushed me. Then he continued to speak. "The app on my phone works for this one too," he said as he pushed a vibrator into my pussy. I was already so wet he didn't need any lube. I bit my tongue and managed to remain silent.

"And of course I haven't forgotten these gorgeous tits," he said as he tweaked my nipple clamps. "The great thing about these babies... I mean other than the fact that your tits look hot as fuck... is that those diamonds are like weights, as I'm sure you've already noticed. You'll really feel them once you're suspended. Are they still OK? Not too much pain?" he asked.

"They're fine, Master. They don't hurt anymore," I answered.

"Good," he responded as he slipped the harness around me and snapped it in several places. There were straps around my waist and shoulders, but my breasts were still completely bare. Christian examined the straps again and then commanded, "Get on the bed and lie down, face down. Be careful with the nipple clamps."

For the next hour or so, Christian meticulously hoisted me up to the ceiling using ropes that he not only attached to the harness but also wrapped and tied carefully around my body in designs so intricate that he could have probably won awards with them. My arms were splayed open like wings, and I constantly felt the gravitational pull on the nipple clamps. They didn't exactly hurt, but they made me feel hot and bothered. My legs were spread and held in place by a spreader bar that was attached just above my knees and intricately connected to the rest of the ropes. Christian took his time, stopping to stare at me occasionally, and to ask me if I felt any pain. But there was nothing painful about the process. Nerve wracking, yes, as I questioned a few times whether the rings that were screwed in the ceiling were strong enough to hold my weight. But I trusted Christian. He wouldn't let me fall.

Once he had hoisted me to the very top, so my back was actually touching the ceiling, Christian surprised me by leaving the room. He didn't say anything. He just looked up at me with a satisfied smile and walked out the door. To make matters worse, he didn't close the door on his way out. I was so afraid that Gail, or worse yet, Taylor, would come in and find me like that. The man had already seen me naked, I'm sure. But then so had everyone at the play party. I wondered briefly whether Kate and Elliot had seen us playing after Christian stripped me naked. I guessed that they had been there somewhere watching.

Now, here I was trussed up on Christian's playroom ceiling. I was completely helpless, and the experience of being this extremely under Christian's control was really turning me on. Because of the spreader bar between my legs, I couldn't press my legs together as I felt myself getting aroused. Well, I thought to myself, at least the toys weren't vibrating. As if they could read my mind, at that moment, both the butt plug and the vibrator in my pussy began to hum. He wasn't even in the room, but he was controlling the toys, and he had turned them on at the exact moment that I thought of them. Holy shit! I could tell that they were on the lowest speed, but I didn't know for how long.

Where was he? How long was he going to leave me here? For what felt like hours but was probably more like five minutes, I hung there, feeling more and more aroused by the vibrations of the toys. I heard his voice before I saw him, and I panicked because I thought he wasn't alone.

"Yes, Mom, we will both be there. Ana wanted me to let you know. She's tied up at the moment, but she said to let you know she's looking forward to it."

The bastard! I'm tied up at the moment? Really? I'll show him tied up at the moment. As if he could hear my thoughts, he smirked up at me. I watched him as he lay down on the bed and continued to talk on the phone. His eyes were fixed on me for the entirety of the conversation, smiling playfully. Suddenly, he increased the speed of both vibrators, but he continued to talk on the phone as if he didn't notice.

"Mom, thanks for saying that, and I agree. She is special. Very special." He paused a moment to listen and then replied, "I hope so, Mom."

OK, could this get any creepier or could I get any hornier? I was suspended from his playroom ceiling, I had a vibrator up my ass and another up my pussy that were going crazy and were going to make me come at any moment, and he was talking on the phone with his mother... about me. Christian Grey was freakier than I thought. And I must be too, because I didn't feel freaked out by this realization, and I really wanted to come while he was still on the phone with his mom. I wanted to show him that I could come without making any noise.

Christian ended his call and continued to lie there silently watching me growing closer and closer to climax. I'm sure he had noticed me glaring at him when he first entered the room, before I remembered myself, so I suspected that he was prolonging my torture as punishment. I hung there trying my best to push back the impending orgasm, waiting for him to make a move, wondering if he would increase the speed of the vibrators again, in which case I would not be able to hold it off any longer. Since this was a punishment, I knew he wouldn't give me permission to come, and if I couldn't hold back, I would give him yet another reason to punish me. I knew that his leaving the room, taking the call from his mom, and the way he was smirking at me... all these things were his twisted way of toying with me, trying to provoke me. That was one reason I had calmed myself and tuned out his conversation with his mother. Now, as I hung there, I tried hard not to look at him, and to think about anything else to hold off the orgasm just a little longer. I tried to just zone out.

"Look at me, princess," he commanded, and when I obeyed, I realized that he was jacking off as he watched me. Oh God, that was hot. He was so sexy, and he was getting himself off by watching me hanging from his ceiling. God, I wanted him. Oh, God I was going to come.

"If you come without my permission, you're going to sleep with that butt plug up your ass all night."

"Oh, God!" I moaned.

"No, it's just me," Christian quipped. Then he asked, "Are you in pain, Anastasia?"

"No, Master," I replied.

Immediately, he turned up the vibrators another setting, and I couldn't hold back a loud moan.

"Please, Master," I cried. "I can't..."

"Yes, you can," he insisted. "Hold it, pet." He was jacking off again with one hand, and in his other hand, he held his phone. Oh, shit. Was he...?

"Red!" I cried out, and it had nothing to do with the orgasm that I could no longer hold off. "Red, red, red!"


	16. Chapter 16: Red! (APOV)

**Chapter 16: Red!** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"Red!" I cried out, and it had nothing to do with the orgasm that I could no longer hold off. "Red, red, red!"

Christian looked shocked. He quickly sat up, turned off the vibrators, and put down his phone. "Are you in pain, Ana?" he asked, sounding very worried.

I couldn't answer. All I could think of was a memory that I had long buried, that had suddenly come rushing back. Oh, shit! Oh, God! I hated crying. I hated showing weakness, but it was impossible to hold back the tears.

While it had taken over an hour to hoist me up, Christian had me down on the bed in just a minute, and all the rope cut away within just a few more seconds. He removed the vibrators and nipple clamps, and lastly, he removed my collar. By the time he had finished all this, I was still sobbing, still unable to speak.

"Ana, where are you hurting, love?" Christian asked as he gently wiped the tears from my face. My Master had left the room, and in his place was my very concerned boyfriend. His hands examined my body, looking for injuries. "Talk to me, Ana. Let me help you."

I continued to sob but was finally able to say, "Your... phone..."

"My phone?" he questioned.

"You were... You were... recording..."

Christian grabbed his phone, unlocked it, and opened the camera. "Yes, I was videoing you. I took some pictures too. Is that a hard limit, Anastasia?" he asked as he handed me the camera. He still sounded worried, but I think he was relieved that I wasn't physically injured. "You can delete anything there."

Still sobbing, I looked at his phone. Sure enough, there was a video of me suspended from the ceiling that he'd taken just a few minutes ago. There were photos as well, not only of me hanging from the ceiling, but also from earlier, when I had been blindfolded. I had to admit... they were all really hot. Part of me could understand why he wanted them.

I finally dried my tears and faced Christian. "What were you planning to do with these pictures?"

Christian stared at me for a moment before he answered. He cleared his throat first, and looked embarrassed. "I won't do anything with them if you don't want me to have them. Delete them, Ana. I didn't know it was a hard limit. But to answer your question... I always took pictures... before. I kept them in my safe. But I don't need that with you. The video... God, you looked hot, and you were seconds away from coming. I wanted to watch that again later. But I don't want it now. It'll only remind me of hurting you, and I never wanted to hurt you."

"It's OK, Christian," I assured him. I finally felt calm again. I realized that my panic had nothing to do with anything Christian had done and everything to do with what had happened to me years ago. I smiled at Christian. "You didn't know. God, I didn't even know. I told you I didn't know all my limits yet. I guess we just discovered one."

"Are you going to tell me why you reacted like that?" he asked. "I thought I'd hurt you. Suspension can be really dangerous, and I was afraid you were injured."

"No... it just... triggered a memory," I explained. "One that I had long buried."

"Fuck!" Christian spat. "I wanted your first time in here to be perfect. And I made you safe word your very first time..."

"Christian, stop it," I interrupted. "It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong," I assured him. I handed his phone back to him without deleting any of the photos or the video. "I panicked, and it had nothing to do with you. I trust you. You can keep the photos, and the video too. I know you aren't going to sell any of it to the tabloids or put it online. You'd never betray me like that."

"Damn straight, I won't," he answered. "But Ana... I don't need any of these." He looked at his phone to refer to the photos.

"Did it please you to take them?" I asked.

"Of course," he answered.

"And will it please you to look at them?" I asked.

"Hell yes," he answered. "It's just..."

"No, it's OK. My purpose as your submissive is to please you. So I'm glad my photos please you. I want you to keep them. Just promise me that nobody else will ever see them."

Christian looked in my eyes and stroked my face as he said, "I can safely assure you of that. I never want anyone else to look at what is mine. You have no idea how hard it was for me to play with you at the play party, do you? All those other Doms ogling you, wanting what's mine. There's no way in hell I would share these pictures with anyone. They're mine." Christian looked back at his phone again and continued, "But not the video." He deleted it as he spoke. "I don't want to remember how I made you safe word."

"I'm sorry, Christian," I said remorsefully.

"You're sorry? God, baby, I'm the one who should be sorry, not you," he said incredulously.

"It wasn't your fault, Christian. You had no way of knowing that recording me like that would trigger a bad memory. Even I didn't know that would happen, so how could you..."

"Shhh," Christian stopped me by putting his finger over my lips. "Can we just... try to forget it happened. I mean, I still want to know what happened to you, but only when you're ready to tell me. I hope this... experience... hasn't spoiled my play room for you."

"Of course not," I assured him. "Christian, I love being your submissive in this room. I'm sorry our first session ended the way it did. I promise to make it up to you the next time we come in here."

Christian smirked at me. "I'll hold you to that if you'll stop apologizing. Are you ready to get out of here?"

When I said "Yes," Christian stood up, helped me to my feet, and then tossed me over his shoulder like a bag of flour. "Christian!" I yelled as he headed for the door. "Christian, we're both naked! You have staff!"

"Who are all safe in their own quarters right now," he replied.

"But don't you have security cameras?" I asked.

"Disabled, for now. At least the ones between here and our bedroom. Taylor knows, just as he knew to disable the ones in the kitchen when we were in there this morning. Anastasia, I promise I'm not going to surprise you with video footage that compromises you. I wouldn't do that to you."

"I know you wouldn't. That's not what I'm worried about," I said as he carried me down the hall towards the stairs. It didn't escape me that he'd referred to his bedroom as ours, but I didn't comment on that.

"What then?" he asked.

"Maybe your staff seeing my bare ass," I answered dryly.

"And a mighty fine ass it is," Christian responded with a smack on said ass.

I gave up arguing as he descended the stairs and headed for "our" bedroom. He headed straight for the bathroom before he put me down.

"A bath," Christian didn't ask. He turned on the tap and started filling the tub. He added bath oil as he said, "You didn't get the aftercare you needed after our session. I'm sure you feel sore already after more than an hour of suspension, not to mention the flogging before that, even if it was sensual, not painful. You'll feel even more sore tomorrow if we don't give your body the attention it needs now. Get in."

He wasn't using his Dom voice, but I obeyed as if he were. "Yes, Master," I said as I slipped into the water.

"Anastasia..." he warned.

"Yes, yes, I know. No collar." When he turned off the tap and got in behind me, and I settled against him, I decided that it was a good time to get some of my questions answered. "Christian, can I ask you... a few things?"

Christian squirted some bath oil in his hand and began to rub my shoulders. "I thought you might have a few questions. Ask away."

"Well, first of all, do you have a habit of carrying naked subs through your penthouse?" I asked.

He didn't stop rubbing my shoulders and back, but I heard his snort before he answered, "Carrying them, no, certainly not. But naked subs in my penthouse, yes." He paused before he explained, "Anastasia, you have to remember, I've had fifteen submissives before you, and you're the first one who hasn't been full time TPE. You're my first girlfriend, the first one who's been more than a sub. They all walked around naked, at my command. They did whatever I wanted them to, wherever and whenever I wanted it. My staff are used to there being naked women."

"So to your staff, I'm just another naked submissive?" I asked.

"You will never be just another naked submissive to anyone, Anastasia, especially not me, and therefore not my staff. Look, I can't promise that none of them will see you naked. I'm sure Taylor saw... something... this morning. And I don't like it any more than I liked those men seeing you at the play party last night, but I trust Taylor. He's discrete, and he's fucking good at his job. It's a given then that we can trust the rest of the security staff. Whoever is manning the control room knows to disarm the security cameras when they start seeing any... action between the two of us. If they fail for any reason, the footage will be deleted immediately. It will never compromise either of us. You have my word. They all also know damn well that you're a whole fucking lot more than a sub to me. Do you think I cared about the security cameras with any of the fifteen? The more I had them on camera, the better. More insurance. I have so many images of them in my safe, probably hundreds, of all fifteen. Pictures I took, and from security footage." Christian had been rubbing my back as he spoke. "Lean forward," he said.

I obeyed him without comment, and he began to rub my lower back. I was in heaven, but still focused on the conversation. "So... you aren't going to put any pictures of me in your safe?"

"Hell no," he answered. "I've never trusted anyone as much as I trust you, Anastasia. Surely you see that by now. I don't need insurance with you. Do I?"

"No, and I'm glad you realize it," I answered. "But about the others... If you have all those images in your safe of them, then why are you so worried about the videos that Elena has? You have their signed contracts too, right? With the pictures you have, I'm sure you have plenty of proof that it was all consensual."

"That's all well and good if any of them ever decided to try to press charges against me. They wouldn't have a leg to stand on, because I can prove it was consensual. But it would damage my reputation irreparably. I can only imagine how my parents would react if they knew..."

I sat further forward so I could turn towards him and look him in the eye. "I think you need to tell them. I think the filthy cunt manipulated you into thinking they would reject you, but Christian, if they're the loving parents that I suspect that they are, they won't reject you. They'll be shocked, no doubt, but they'll still love you."

"Enough," Christian said softly, but forcefully enough that he may as well have shouted. "You may sound just like him right now, but you're not my fucking therapist."

"Maybe not," I answered, still looking in his eyes, totally unintimidated by his look that I knew had melted some of the most powerful business leaders in the world. "But I've gotten where I am for a reason. I mean besides following your example. I'm really good at reading people and situations, just like you. And I'm telling you, you're brilliant, Christian, but you're reading this one all wrong."

"I said enough, Anastasia," Christian said, a little louder than before, sounding more like his Dom voice. "Change of subject. Tell me how you liked the play room. I mean before things went downhill there at the end."

I took a deep breath, realizing that I needed to give in and give him his change of topic, for now. I would not give up though, not until the evil bitch was out of his life for good. "I loved it," I said honestly.

"I'm glad to hear it," he said. He relaxed again and pulled me back against him. His hands moved to my collarbone and massaged me there for a while. "Can I ask you a question now?"

"Mmm hmm," I answered. "You want to know why I freaked out, don't you?"

"Well, it had crossed my mind," he answered. "But if you're not ready to talk about it, I understand."

"No, it's OK," I said. "I'll tell you. I guess I have a phobia of being videoed in... compromising situations. It triggered a memory of something that happened when I was a teenager. My stepdad at the time... He was awful."

"Stephen Morton?" Christian asked.

I was surprised but not angry that he knew the asshole's name. "God, you're good. How long did it take you to find out everything about me? And the fact that you remember his name from a report you read... that's impressive."

"Taylor ordered the background report on you while we were at the Mile High Club, as soon we we went into the private dining room. The email was waiting when I got home. And I'm good with names."

"Wow, your guy is fast," I commented.

"He is," Christian agreed. "So... Stephen Morton?"

"God, I hate hearing that name," I answered. "Can we refer to him some other way? I don't like to even think of him, much less dignify him by using his name."

"Kind of like we say 'filthy cunt' instead of 'Elena Lincoln'?" Christian asked with his usual smirk.

"Exactly," I answered. "I usually refer to him as 'husband number three," but that reminds me of the terrible mistake my mother made with him."

"What would you like me to call him?" Christian asked. "If he hurt you, then I could call him a dead man."

"How about I just tell you what he did, and then we can just not talk about him at all after that?" I suggested.

"Sounds like a plan," Christian answered.

"OK, well, first, he seduced my mom. She was still married to Ray at the time, but he was deployed. He was in Iraq. Mom was lonely, and Stephen took advantage. They worked together. Anyway, they had an affair, and when Ray returned, he caught them together. Crushed him. Destroyed their marriage. They divorced, and Mom married Stephen. Then he decided to move to Colorado, and I had to go with them because I was still a minor. Ray had adopted me, but Mom got full custody of me when they divorced, so there wasn't much he could do."

"Raymond Steele?" Christian asked.

"Yeah, my dad," I answered. "So anyway, we moved to Colorado, and at first, everything was OK. Stephen had been nice enough to me when we'd lived in Washington, and he continued to be OK at first when we moved to Colorado. But what I didn't realize..." I took a deep breath before I continued. "He had installed cameras in my bathroom. He was recording me showering."

"I'll kill him," Christian said calmly.

"Not only that, but he was posting the videos online. Apparently, I had a following, and I didn't even know it."

"Good God," Christian said. "How old were you?"

"I was fifteen," I answered. And then I contemplated whether or not to tell Christian the rest. It was so embarrassing. But I wanted him to know. "There's more, but this is really embarrassing, so it's hard to tell you."

"Anastasia, you were fifteen. You don't need to be embarrassed about something that happened when you were still a child," he said.

I raised my eyebrows at his hypocrisy. "Really, Christian?"

He actually blushed. "That's different, Ana. I had a choice. You didn't even know."

"Well, I disagree, but anyway, that's not what we're talking about at the moment. The thing that is embarrassing is that... I used to... shit, why is this so hard to tell you?"

"Hey, I recognize that blush," Christian teased. "What did you used to do, Ana?"

I took a deep breath and bit the bullet. "I used to get myself off in the shower, OK? And that asshole recorded it and put the videos online where any creep who paid for it could watch me masturbating in the shower, naked."

"I'll kill him," Christian repeated.

"Can you guess how I found out what he was doing?" I asked him.

Christian studied my face for a moment. "Shit. Boys at your school."

"Yes and no," I answered. "There were boys at school who started looking at me differently. I thought it was because of how my body was developing. I had grown boobs, and they noticed. But they started making comments. Confusing comments. I had no idea that they were talking about what they'd seen me doing in the shower. But I guess word got around enough for the school administration to find out about it. And then, I got called into the guidance counselor's office. He all but accused me of making the videos and putting them online myself."

"Holy shit! So did you get in trouble?" Christian asked.

"No, but only because he saw my confusion and shock when I found out about it. I was hysterical. I actually had a panic attack, and they had to call the paramedics. He also knew my record. I was an honors student who had never been in any kind of trouble. So it wasn't hard for him to connect the dots. So, no, I didn't get in trouble, but my mom and... that asshole did. The school counselor called DHS. I spent that night in a foster home, and then Ray came the next day. I moved back to Washington with him. Stephen was arrested. He served several years in prison on child porn charges."

"So... did your mother know what was going on?" Christian asked.

"No, she had no idea. When she found out, she was so shocked she couldn't speak, and then she had her own breakdown. You can only imagine the guilt she felt. It took her some time to get over it. She went through some pretty serious depression after that. She left Stephen immediately and filed for divorce. She moved back to Washington so she could be near me, but she didn't try to get me to move back with her. I think she always wanted to get back with Ray, but she felt too guilty for how she had hurt us both. She just couldn't bring herself to try. She didn't think she deserved it."

"Weren't you angry with her?" Christian asked.

"Oh, yes, I was very angry. I didn't want to see her at all. I flat out refused to talk with her for almost a year. Ray was the one who finally helped me forgive her."

"How?"

"Because he forgave her. He couldn't be married to her again, but he pursued a friendship with her. Over time, they actually became great friends, so much so that when she married Bob, he even walked her down the aisle."

"You've got to be kidding," Christian said.

"I kid you not," I answered. "And several months after we'd returned home, when I was still refusing to speak to Mom, he gave me a good talking to. I'll never forget it. He said life is too short to hold on to grudges, and that if I was ever going to have any peace in my own heart, I had to make peace with her. I'm so thankful he did that. I only had a few years with her after that, before she was taken from me. I'm glad I forgave her. I'm glad we were able to move on and let it go. I honestly hadn't thought about it in years until you triggered the memory earlier."

Christian made a face, clearly not wanting to think about how he'd inadvertently hurt me. He quickly changed the subject. "So you were close to her... after that?"

"Yes, we had always been close, and we were again. God, I miss her."

We were both quiet for a couple of minutes. Then I laughed and said, "We've spent a lot of time in this tub today. And shared a lot of things with each other here that I wouldn't have expected to have shared this early in our relationship."

Christian took my hand and began to caress it. "I guess there's something about bathing together."

"Maybe," I agreed. "I sure don't feel like I only met you Thursday. Seems like I've known you for years already."

"Getting tired of me already?" he joked.

I smiled, "Just the opposite."

"Me too," he said. "I never wanted to be intimate with anyone. Now, I crave it with you. I can't get enough of you."

I was two seconds away from using the L word. I had to stop it. Instead, I giggled and said, "I'm getting all pruny though. We need to get out of here."

"OK, if you insist," Christian responded. He stood up, grabbed a towel, helped me out, and wrapped it around me. Then he picked me up, carried me back into the bedroom, and placed me on the bed.

"I can walk, you know," I told him. But I didn't complain too much because I was really enjoying the attention he was giving me.

He simply smirked at me and didn't respond. He slid into bed next to me and cuddled me. "It's your turn to ask me a question," he said.

"Really?" I asked. I knew what I wanted to ask him, but I wasn't sure he was ready to talk about it. I sensed that he knew what I wanted to ask.

He smiled sadly at me. "Really, Ana. After what we were just talking about, and what I told you earlier today, I know you want to ask me about my birth mom. It's OK."

"Wow, you really are good at reading people," I responded. "Your reputation is well deserved."

He kissed me chastely on the lips before he said, "So is yours."

"Can I ask... what happened to her? Your birth mom?" I asked.

Christian sighed before he answered, "She died when I was four years old. Drug overdose. She was a drug addict. A crack whore. I was alone with her body four days before she was discovered."

I felt tears stinging my eyes as I thought of that four year old little boy. But I knew him well enough to hold back my tears. I knew he didn't want my pity. "Oh my God," was all I said.

Christian continued, "Her pimp was the one who discovered her. He was the same son of a bitch who gave me the scars I'm sure you've seen on my chest and back. Cigarette burns. He got off on using me as his ash tray."

"Holy shit!" I cried out.

"Yeah, so he came in, saw her... and me curled up against her cold body. I can still hear his voice in my head. 'She's dead, you dumbass.' I didn't even know what that meant, but I knew it was bad. He left me there with her, and it was a long time before the police came. They took me to the hospital. That's where I met Grace. She said I was malnourished and dehydrated. I don't remember anything about the hospital, but I remember her. She was my angel."

"And then she and Carrick adopted you," I said.

"And then they adopted me," he agreed.

"Somehow I already know that you didn't live 'happily ever after,'" I said sadly.

He sighed again before he responded. "No... I was too fucked up already. I should have though. They're the best parents anyone could hope for."

I knew I was taking a risk by asking my next question, but I needed to know. "Why did you call your mom... Grace... while I was suspended in the playroom? Why were you talking to her while you were looking at me?" I asked.

Christian chuckled a little. "Relax," he said, "You aren't going to offend me with your questions. It's OK." Then his hands were on my breasts, kneading them. His touch was more soothing than sexual at the moment. After pausing a moment, he explained, "Ana... fifty shades, not a hundred and fifty. I have issues, but I don't think I have a fucking Oedipus Complex. No, I didn't want to fuck my birth mother, and I sure as hell have never wanted to fuck Grace. She's my mom. I was talking with her in the play room to fuck with you. I knew it would make you feel something... either nervous or angry, or a combination. And I knew you were getting close to orgasm, so having my mother on the phone fucked with you even more. I wondered if you could come silently. Oh the fun we can have if you can. But anyway, I mainly wanted to see the look on your face, which was priceless."

"I can only imagine," I muttered. Then I sighed because his hands on my breasts felt so good.

Christian said, "Ana, believe me, when I told you that I beat my subs, who looked like my birth mother, because I was punishing her, it was just that. Punishing her. Not anything sexual. Sure, I had sex with my subs after I punished them, but that was different. I wasn't thinking about my birth mother. I know it's still fucked up though."

"Do you still want to punish her?" I asked.

"I haven't really thought about it since I met you," he answered.

I moaned as Christian rubbed my nipples. I reached my hands up and weaved my fingers through his hair, and he kissed my neck. "Tell me this," I said. "If I hadn't had that meltdown in the play room... what do you think would have happened?"

"You want to know how I saw that scene playing out?" he asked as he kissed my neck and then nibbled my ear.

"Mmm hmm," was all I could answer.

His hands moved down my stomach to cup my sex. "Well, you were about to come without permission," he answered as he inserted two fingers into my core.

"Why do you do that?" I asked. "You know I have to come. You make me come. Then you punish me if I do."

"Training," he answered. "You've never had to hold it before. Hell, you were doing good to come at all. But your orgasms will be a lot stronger if you hold them back as long as possible." Christian continued to pump me with his fingers, and with his free hand, he reached up and tweaked my nipple. "Let me prove it to you. Don't come until I say so. Hold it until I tell you to."

"Will you punish me if I come?" I asked.

"You sound like you want me to," he laughed.

I giggled. "Yeah, maybe."

"Trust me, Ana, you'll enjoy this. A lot. Just hold it. I don't want to punish you. I want you to hold back the orgasm." At that, Christian pumped me harder and played with my nipple as he kissed my neck.

"Oh God!" was all I could say as I clenched my teeth. I tried to squeeze my knees together, but Christian wouldn't let me.

"After you came without permission in the play room, I was going to lower you down so I could reach you. I was going to remove the vibrator in your pussy and eat you out. You would have come again at least twice, with my permission, and without eye contact since my face would have been buried between your legs."

"Christian, please! I can't hold back. I'm going to come!" I cried.

Immediately his hands stilled. In fact, he removed them from me completely and sat up. Then he leaned towards me and spoke softly in my ear. "Then, I would have lowered you to the bed and cut away all the ropes. I would have strapped your hands to the headboard. And then I would have fucked you hard until you came at least twice more. I would have tried for three, but I doubt I could have lasted that long."

"Christian, please!" I cried.

"Please what, Anastasia?" he asked.

"Please... fuck me," I answered.

Christian chuckled. "Your wish is my command," he said. "But first, I'm going to give you what I'd intended to in the playroom." He knelt between my legs, spread them wide, and lowered his head.

"Oh, God!" I cried as he licked and sucked my clit. He gave me exactly what he'd promised, but only after a few more minutes of exquisite torture. Once he gave me permission to come, he flipped us over so that I was riding his face, and I came quickly. He held my hips tightly so that I could not escape until he had brought me to a second orgasm. After that, we fucked so hard that we each came twice before we paused to catch our breath. We both had just enough energy left for one more, this time with me riding him, not restrained. I was careful not to touch his chest, but he didn't seem worried.

I could have sworn, as I was drifting off to sleep, that I heard Christian say those three words that I had been careful all day not to say to him. I must have been dreaming already.


	17. Chapter 17: Family Brunch (CPOV)

**Chapter 17: Family Brunch** _(Christian's POV)_

"Christian!" I heard my little sister's excited squeal and the click of her heels before we even reached the door of my parents' house, and I wanted to kick myself for forgetting to warn Anastasia. We had talked extensively about what it was going to be like for her to see Elliot again after the play party, and Ana was nervous about it. She was afraid she was going to act weird around him after seeing so much of him with Kate at the play party. I understood her concern, but I thought she would be fine. It was just a matter of getting used to the lifestyle. We had spent so much time talking about Elliot that I had almost forgotten to mention Mia at all. I had mentioned that Mia had just returned from France a couple of days ago, but I had neglected to mention that Mia was the most boisterous of the three of us.

"Mia can be a handful," I whispered in her ear as we approached the door.

Anastasia innocently asked, "Why is that?" Before I had a chance to answer, the door flew open. Too late.

Mia threw her arms around my neck. "I missed you!" she cried. After we hugged, she stepped back and said, "Holy shit, what did I miss while I was gone. First Elliot, and now you. I never thought I'd live to see the day!"

I made the introductions. "Mia, this is Ana. My girlfriend. Ana, this is my little sister, Mia. So, Mia... what did you mean about Elliot?" I asked.

"Only that he brought a girl too." she answered excitedly. "You both brought home a girl to Sunday Brunch on my first weekend back. Damn, Christian, I was only in Paris for three months. You guys have been busy. And look at you... Anastasia Steele is your girlfriend!" She turned to Ana and said, "I know we've never met in person, Ana, but you're one of my heroes. I've seen you at some of our charity events, but I've never been brave enough to talk to you. I hope we can be friends now that you're dating my brother."

"I'm sure we will be," Ana replied confidently.

I ignored most of what Mia had just said and focused on what I'd first heard. "Elliot brought a girl? Home... for Sunday Brunch?" I'm sure I sounded as shocked as I felt, but this was a first. Well, it was a first for me too. But both of us, on the same day? What were the chances of that? I glanced at Anastasia, who also looked surprised.

"Kate?" she asked.

"Must be," I replied as we walked inside.

Mia laughed. "Yeah, her name is Kate. They're in the living room. I'll see you in a minute. I need to go check on the cake I'm baking and see if Mom needs any more help." Mia walked past the door to the living room, and I led Ana inside. Sure enough, Elliot was sitting on the sofa with Kate, and I'm not sure which one of them was more googly-eyed. Kate was wearing a light pink sweater with a white skirt, and she didn't look anything like the Dominatrix that I knew she was.

"Kate?!" Ana repeated as she saw her friend. She sounded even more shocked now that we were seeing her face to face. "What are you doing here?"

"The same thing you are, I think," Kate replied with her usual snarkiness. "Hi, Christian," she said, a bit too flirtatiously. I was still so shocked to find her and Elliot together that I hadn't spoken to either of them yet.

"Kate, Elliot, this is a surprise," I said.

"Yeah, it sure is," Elliot grinned. "And I could say the same about you, bro. You're still with Anastasia Fucking Steele. I take it it's OK to say her name now..."

"Elliot, watch it," I warned him. I glanced at Ana, who was blushing and looking around the room. I'm sure she was doing that to avoid looking at Elliot.

"Just Ana," Anastasia corrected him, still not looking at him, but doing her best to sound normal. "I got in trouble with Christian for adding the same middle name that you just added to mine. And even though I really like the sound of Christian Fucking Grey, I think we can both do without the extra name."

I couldn't help laughing at her. She was trying so hard to sound normal, but she still had not been able to look at Elliot, and she was still blushing.

"So you guys are... together?" Elliot asked me.

"Clearly," I replied. "And you and Kate?"

Elliot smiled proudly. "You got it bro. Full time TP..." He'd started to say TPE, but Kate cut him off. Holy shit, he was doing full time Total Power Exchange with Kate Kavanagh! He let her publicly ass fuck him at the play party, and now, he was her full-time submissive. As far as I knew, Elliot had never had a full time Domme, and I knew him better than anyone. This was a huge step for him.

"Elliot, that's enough," Kate said. She continued in a voice so low that Ana and I could barely hear her. "We can talk with them more later when we're in a secure environment. But while we're in your parents home, no more talk of that. I warned you. We'll discuss your punishment later."

Elliot smirked and whispered in her ear loud enough for Ana and me to hear it, "Yes, Mistress, as you wish." Kate glared at him.

"El, can I talk with you privately for a minute," I asked him. I needed to get him away from Kate to find out what the fuck was going on with them. I also knew that Ana would feel more comfortable talking with Kate if Elliot wasn't there.

"Sure, Christian," Kate answered for him. "I want to have a word with Ana anyway. Go ahead, Elliot."

Elliot gave her a cheesy smile before he joined me at the wet bar on the other side of the room. I poured a glass of Dad's brandy for each of us. "Elliot, tell me what's gotten into you," I whispered. "I saw you at the party. You let her ass fuck you. I know that was a hard limit, so why'd you do it, and why the hell are you doing TPE with her?"

"Dude, calm down," Elliot responded. "Christian, why are you surprised when you're the one who fixed us up?"

"I knew she was your type, El. I knew you'd have fun with her. But I didn't expect you'd let her ass fuck you, much less do TPE."

"You talk like those are bad things. God, you're such a Dom." Elliot rolled his eyes, which of course pissed me off even more.

"It is if it's a hard limit and you let a Domme coerce you into doing it anyway," I explained.

"She didn't coerce me," Elliot argued. "I... compromised. I'm the one who wanted TPE, and she wouldn't agree to it unless I let her ass fuck me. And boy, am I ever glad that I gave in. Dude, have you ever tried it? It's out of this world. I never knew it could be so good. If I'd known how great it would feel, I never would have been opposed to it."

"I could have lived a thousand years without knowing that. Or seeing it either, for that matter. Thank God, Ana didn't see it." I wanted to distract him so he wouldn't ask me again if I'd ever done it. I didn't want to have to answer that question. As far as he knew, I'd only ever been a Dom.

"Yeah, well, I saw what you did to her," Elliot said. "That was so hot."

Good, that worked, but I didn't really want to talk about Ana either, at least not what he'd seen us doing at the play party. "I'm glad she didn't know you were watching. She can't even look at you as it is, and that's just because of what she saw you and Kate doing. If she knew that you'd seen her, she'd probably feel humiliated, and she's not the kind of girl who gets off on that. Don't expect any more shows from us. We probably won't be attending any more play parties."

"Why the hell not?" Elliot whined. "I thought you might even consider... Kate's open to the idea... and you and I have done it before..."

Oh Hell no! I had to interrupt him before he could finish that incredibly stupid thought. "Elliot, have you lost your fucking mind? I know you weren't about to suggest group play."

"Why not, bro? Kate's open to it. She's not bi, but she's willing to play. Can you imagine how hot it would be to watch Kate go down on Ana?"

I felt like punching him in the face, but I held back. He saw my anger though. "Nobody... let me repeat that for you, NOBODY... goes down on Ana, except for me, and I don't give shows. Have you got that, Elliot? I DO NOT SHARE!"

"OK, chill, bro. It was just an idea. I promise, I don't want Ana. I only want Kate. I was only suggesting playing, and if you don't want to, then that's cool."

"OK then." I forced myself to calm down. "Are you sure you know what you're doing with Kate, Elliot? This is so unlike you, this full-time TPE thing. It's a huge commitment."

"You're telling me," he said. "But yes, I knew when I first laid eyes on her that I wanted her, and I'll do anything for her. She's the one, Christian. There isn't a shred of doubt in my mind."

"The one, Elliot?" I questioned. "What the hell do you mean?"

"The one, Christian. My soul mate. My other half."

"Holy shit, Elliot, it sounds like you're talking like you want to... "

"Marry her?" he interrupted me. "I do. And I will." His eyes challenged me to dispute him.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "Elliot... you can't be serious, bro. She's a Dominatrix. She's not going to be interested in that shit."

"Wrong again, brother dear," Elliot said as he glanced across the room and made eye contact with Kate. They both smiled sickeningly cheesy smiles at each other. "She wants it. She wants me. I'm telling you, it was love at first fucking sight for both of us. Ask her. She'll agree. We're not engaged or anything, but it's just a matter of time."

"Holy shit, El. You're serious." I was dumbfounded. And worried as fuck. Elliot had never sounded so... pussy whipped. Hell, he'd never had a girlfriend that lasted more than a month, and since he'd been in the lifestyle, he had not been serious about any of the women he'd played with. And I didn't trust Kate Kavanagh. Would a Dominatrix like her really want to be in a long-term arrangement, much less marriage with my idiot brother?

Just then, Mia burst through the door. "Sorry! Mom needed my help in the kitchen. I can't wait for you guys to sample my skills. Mom had to take a call from the hospital, and Dad is still finishing up some work in his office, so they'll be a few more minutes."

Elliot and I moved back to the other side of the room and joined the ladies. "So you were actually studying cooking over there, not just shopping?" Elliot asked Mia teasingly.

"It's called culinary school," Mia answered snarkily. "And yes, I actually studied. I didn't shop... much." I had her credit card statements that said otherwise, but I wasn't going to complain if she was happy. She had done well in her studies, and she was excited to be back home. I knew she had dreams to open her own restaurant, and I would help her when the time came.

"I'm glad you're home, Mia," I told her. "I really missed you."

She hugged me again. "Me too, Christian." Then she turned to Ana. "So, you're dating my brother. Did he tell you that he's never had a girlfriend before?"

Ana giggled, and I got hard right there in my parents' living room. Holy shit, I loved that giggle. "He told me," Ana answered Mia. "What about you, Mia?" Ana asked, and I admired her tact in changing the subject. "Do you have a significant other?"

Mia blushed. Uh oh. What was she hiding? "There was a guy in Paris. I thought we had something... but it didn't work out. No biggie."

"Oh, sorry," Ana responded.

Mia smiled. "No, really, it's no big deal. We wanted different things. Besides, I'm still young, so I don't want to get serious about anyone yet. Right now, I want to focus on my career."

"That sounds wise," Ana told her. "When I was building my company, I didn't date anyone for a couple of years, and then, even when I did, my work always came first."

"What about now, Ana?" Mia asked. "Now that you're dating your competition and all... does your work still come first?" Mia's tone was teasing, but I could also see her protectiveness of me coming through.

Ana giggled again. "Christian and I are still figuring out how to balance our relationship and our work. I have a feeling his work has always come first too."

"Yep," I agreed. "This is new for both of us, but I like it, and I know we'll figure it out together."

Ana smiled a dazzling smile at me. I glanced at Mia, and if the look of wonder on her face was any indication, my face also showed my feelings for Ana. Mia had never seen me look at anyone like that before.

Elliot and Kate had been quiet since Mia entered the room, but now, Elliot spoke up. "Hey, sis, why are you giving this asshole all your attention? Are you not surprised I brought home a girl too?"

"Totally, Elliot," Mia responded. "But you've had loads of girlfriends, just not any steady ones in the past couple of years. But I've suspected for a long time that you're a man whore, unlike this one here. I'm still pretty sure I lost my virginity before Christian lost his."

For a moment, there was complete silence. Ana, Kate and Elliot all looked like their eyes were going to pop out of their heads. I'm sure they were all stuck on the idea of me, the big bad Dom, fooling my little sister into thinking I was a fucking virgin, but I was stuck on the idea of Mia giving it up. Who the fuck was he? I needed to get Taylor on it immediately.

I ignored her ridiculous comment about my virginity. "Mia, who was this asshole in Paris? Is that who you gave yourself to? Did he hurt you? And why am I only hearing about it now? Where was your fucking CPO?"

Mia rolled her eyes at me, which made Ana snigger. I shot Ana a warning glare, which only made her giggle. Mia responded by counting off on her fingers, "First of all, I'm 21 years old, which technically makes me an adult, which means that I can fuck whomever I choose to. Second of all, I don't need your permission or approval, and I don't have to report to you every time I have a date. And third of all, Riley is my CPO, not your spy. You may pay her salary, but her job isn't to spy on me for you. Once I cleared that up with her, we got along a lot better. I actually like her now. Once she stopped reporting back to Taylor every time I took a leak, I stopped feeling like I had to sneak out all the time."

I was so angry I was about to lose it. How dare Mia put herself at risk like that! Before I had a chance to go off on her, she put her hand on my shoulder and said, "Calm down, Christian. I was always safe." Mia turned to Ana and Kate and looked back and forth between them as she continued, "You guys wouldn't believe how many guys these two have chased away. Literally chased them away, or threatened them. Scared the shit out of them so they were too afraid to even look at me, much less fuck me. Would you guys believe that these two even scared away my date on the night of my senior prom? Leif Matthews. God, he was hot, and he was going to be my first. But these two..."

Elliot finally spoke up, interrupting Mia's tirade. "Mia, he had a juvie record."

"It was just a little pot," Mia replied. "And it was two years before I even knew him. Elliot, be honest, did you never do anything stupid when you were fifteen years old? And what about you, Christian?"

I was so angry, I had to count backwards in my head from twenty. Mia knew how I felt about drugs. How dare she blow it off like it was nothing. It made me wonder if she had experimented with marijuana herself. If I found out that she had...

"Christian," Ana whispered in my ear, "you know you don't have to answer her, right? Just take a deep breath and try to relax."

I realized then that Ana thought I was upset because Mia had asked me about stupid things I'd done when I was fifteen. She was thinking about Elena.

Thankfully, before anyone could say anything else, my mom mercifully interrupted the conversation. "I'm sorry for taking so long. I had to take a call from the hospital. But in the meantime, the food finished cooking, so we can make our way to the dining room. Hello, Anastasia. It's so good to see you again. And you must be Kate." She smiled and extended her hand towards Kate.

Ana and Kate both greeted my mom, and they made small talk as we made our way to the dining room. As we entered the room, Dad joined us.

Before he took his seat, Dad gave both Elliot and me a pat on the back, and then he stood with his hand on Mia's shoulder as he said, "Sorry for not coming out earlier. I had some work I needed to finish before tomorrow, and I wanted to have the rest of the afternoon free to spend with my family. It's not everyday that both of my sons bring home lovely ladies. You're very welcome to our home, both of you. Mia here is usually outnumbered by her brothers, and it's nice for her to have other ladies around for a change."

Mia smirked up at Dad. "It's a great welcome home surprise," she said.

Ana and Kate both greeted Dad before he spoke to each of them, beginning with Kate. "I understand that you're Eamon Kavanagh's daughter? I've known your dad for years. In fact, we were at Harvard at the same time. Good man." He turned to Ana and said, "And Anastasia Steele... you've done quite well. I've watched the rise of Ismintis International with interest. Reminds me a lot of GEH."

Ana laughed, and my God she looked beautiful as she answered, "With good reason. Christian's been my idol from the beginning. I followed all his advice and modeled my company after his."

I smiled at her as I told my dad, "Ana's being modest. She's gotten where she is because she's a genius."

Dad chucked. "Ah, so beauty and brains," he said.

We took our seats at the table, with Dad at the head, and Mom at the foot. Ana and Kate sat across from each other on each side of Dad, and Elliot and I sat next to our girls. Mia sat next to Elliot. I wondered who the other place next to me was for, but I didn't have long to wonder.

"I hope I'm not late!" As I heard the voice call out, a voice I would prefer to never have to hear again, I cringed, and Ana noticed. She laid her hand on my leg, and I took her hand in mine and squeezed it. I glanced at Ana, and I could see that she realized exactly what was going on. And she thought I was astute. My God, I wasn't exaggerating when I told Dad that my girl was a genius.

"Not at all, Elena dear," Mom answered. "We were just sitting down. You're just in time."

Elena took her seat next to me and smiled her dazzling fake smile at me.

"I thought this was going to be a family brunch," Elliot whispered to Mia, but I could read his lips.

"I thought so too," she responded. Neither of them looked pleased that Elena was there, and I was surprised. I thought they liked her as much as my parents did.

Mom smiled and made the introductions. "Everyone, this is my good friend Elena Lincoln. Elena, let me introduce these ladies to you. Next to Elliot is his girlfriend, Kate Kavanagh. And next to Christian is his girlfriend, Anastasia Steele."

Elena's eyes looked like they were going to bug out of her face as she stared at me and Ana. But then she collected herself and responded graciously, "It's a pleasure to meet you both. I had no idea that either of you boys had girlfriends. How nice!"

"What's for dinner, Mom? It smells great, and I'm starving," Elliot said cheerfully. He totally ignored Elena. What was up with that? Not that I minded of course, but since Elliot was always overly friendly to everyone, I found his behavior odd.

"Beef bourguignon," Mom answered. "I hope nobody here is a vegetarian. I should have asked beforehand, but it slipped my mind. And Mia wanted to show off her Parisian cooking skills."

"Mom, it's not really Parisian," Mia corrected. "It's from Burgundy, not Paris."

"I love beef," Kate responded as she put her hand on Elliot's leg, and I almost sniggered.

"French cuisine is one of my favorites," Ana replied as Mom started serving the food. "Whether it's Burgundy, Paris, Brittany, Loire Valley, Bordeaux... well, I could go on... I've never had French food that wasn't delicious."

Mia looked excited. "Have you tried the food from all those places?"

"Yes," Ana replied, "and have you learned to cook the food from all of those places? Because if you have, I'd love to cook with you sometime and learn a few things."

Mia squealed excitedly. "I love her already!" she said as she looked at me. "We're keeping her, Christian!"

I laughed loudly, which apparently caught everyone at the table off guard. "Mia, she's not a puppy," I said, still laughing. "But I do fully intend to keep her." I smiled at Ana, who was giggling adorably. Then I glanced at Dad, who was watching me in wonder.

We managed to get through the entire meal chatting comfortably, and I didn't have to speak with Elena at all. She chatted a little with Mom, but for the most part, she was uncharacteristically quiet as she listened to the rest of us talking about Mia's experiences in Paris. It turned out that Kate and Ana had both been to Paris in the recent past, so they had a lot of notes to compare with Mia. Elliot smiled at me smugly a few times. Mom and Dad were also quieter than usual as they watched us all interact. I saw that look of wonder in Dad's eye a few times throughout the meal, and I thought I saw a tear in Mom's eye a time or two. What was up with that?

After we enjoyed Mia's chocolate cake, which was delicious, with a couple of bottles of Chateau d'Yquem Sauternes, which I had brought, we moved to the family room. I started talking sports with Dad and Elliot, and it turned out that Ana and Kate were also huge Mariners fans. We all ended up watching the game together. It was entertaining to watch the girls get so excited when the Mariners scored. Little by little, Ana relaxed more around Elliot. As we talked during the game, we found out that Kate was also a Seahawks fan, which made Elliot's day. But like me, Ana didn't care for football. She said that she preferred soccer, or European football, as she called it to my amusement. Turns out that we're both Chelsea fans. Small world.

Ana finally worked up the nerve to speak with Elliot about creating a door to join our homes, and she actually looked him in the eyes without blushing when she did it.

"Sure, Ana Banana, I can do that," Elliot responded. They made plans for him to arrive on Wednesday morning before she left for the office. I texted the plans to Taylor so he could make the arrangements from my end.

A little while later, Ana and Kate went upstairs with Mia to her room, where she wanted to show them some of the clothes she had purchased in Paris. I was still sitting with Dad and Elliot in the family room, and we were making plans for a fishing trip in the near future. It had been several years since we'd done anything like that.

"So I have to say, you both shocked the hell out of me today, but in a good way," Dad told us. "It's good to see you both so happy. They seem like good women."

"The best, Dad," Elliot gushed. Damn, if he didn't sound like a little girl. I smirked at him, and when Dad wasn't looking, he flipped me off. "I'm so proud of her, Dad. She's one of the best journalists in the country. You realize that she's already won several awards for her work?"

"I'm happy to hear it, Elliot. Don't waste any time, either of you," Dad advised us. "You both must be feeling pretty serious about these ladies if you invited them here. Neither of you has ever done that, and all I can say is that it's about damn time. You've both had me worried that you'd never settle down. Now you've got your mother counting grandkids already."

I refrained from rolling my eyes, but I started to tell him, "Dad, it's too soon to..."

Dad interrupted me, "Not true, son. It only takes a moment for you to know when you've met the right woman. With your mom, I knew within five minutes of talking with her that I was going to spend my life with her."

"I know, Dad, you've told us. And you married her a month later," I said.

"And I haven't regretted a single day," he added. "You boys have both seemed so reluctant to have a serious relationship until now. I hope that's changing. There's nothing important in your life than finding love."

"I want that with Kate," Elliot confessed quietly. "She's the one, Dad. I'm sure of it."

"That may very well be, Elliot," Dad said. "But you need to make for damn sure you're right before you make a commitment to her. I wouldn't advise either of you to marry as quickly as your mom and I did. Make sure she's someone you want to spend the rest of your life with before you think about marriage. Trust me, in my line of work, I've seen divorce happen more often than I care to admit, and I'm not even a divorce attorney. I don't want that for either of you. And Elliot, son, to be honest, I've never seen you with the same girl for more than a month. Ever since you hit puberty, you've been like someone with A.D.D. when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex. I really hope that's changing now with Kate, but take things nice and easy with her. Make sure a month from now that you still feel the same way that you do right now. Imagine what she's going to look like ten years from now, especially if she has a kid or two. Her body may not be as... attractive... to you as it is right now. Will that change your feelings? Will you start noticing younger women with hotter bodies? I hope not, because Grey men do not cheat."

"Dad," I said, "This conversation is getting way too deep. We've only just begun to..."

"No, I'm not done yet, Christian," he said as he turned to me. "Your turn. You're 28 years old, and this is the first time I've ever seen you with a woman. Are you sure you know what you're doing with her, son?"

My God, was he really going there? Why couldn't he just leave me the hell alone? "Honestly, Dad, no, I'm not," I answered. "But do we have to do this right now? Like I said, it's still pretty early to be having this conversation."

"Well, I disagree, son, and I'm your father, so it shouldn't surprise you that I'm concerned about you."

I really wanted to find a way to end the conversation, but I wasn't sure how. Fake a phone call? Pretend I needed the restroom? Instead, I asked, "Why are you concerned, Dad?"

Dad looked a little uncomfortable, and he shifted in his seat. "Well, son... Like I said, I'm happy to see you looking so happy, and I think Anastasia is a lovely woman. I just don't know her, but I know her reputation. She's your competition, son. Are you sure she's with you for all the right reasons?"

I'm sure he could see the shock on my face. "Dad, what are you suggesting?" I asked.

"Christian, I'm not suggesting anything. Like I said, I don't know her. I look forward to getting to know her. I'm only looking out for your best interests, that's all."

"Dad, I'm a grown man, and I am fully capable of looking out for my own interests," I told him bluntly.

Dad sighed and responded, "I know you are, Christian. I didn't mean to imply that you aren't. I'm simply a concerned father who has never seen his son in love before. I just don't want to see you get hurt, son."

"Anastasia is an angel, Dad," I assured him. "I am absolutely certain that she isn't using me. She isn't dating me because I'm Christian Grey and she's the CEO of Ismintis. It's not like that."

Dad relaxed and said, "Good. Well, I'm glad to hear it. Like I said, I want to get to know her. I want to get to know them both, especially if they're going to become my daughters-in-law."

"Dad, it's too soon to talk like that," I repeated.

"Do you think she's the one for you?" Dad asked me bluntly.

I felt my face getting red, and Elliot started sniggering at me. I wanted to flip him off like he had me earlier, but Dad was watching us both. "I'm not sure I even believe in that romantic bullshit," I answered. "All I know is that I want to be with her."

Before either of them had a chance to respond to me, Kate burst into the room. "Christian, Ana needs you," she said urgently.

I jumped up and rushed towards Kate. "What happened? Is she hurt?"

"No, but she's in the library... talking with Elena Lincoln," Kate explained. "And Mrs. Lincoln seemed... hostile. I thought you needed to be there."

"Oh, shit!" I exclaimed. "Thanks, Kate." I rushed towards the library, where I heard their voices before I saw them.

The first voice I heard sounded like fingernails on a chalkboard. "You're nothing but a pretentious gold digging slut, you mousy little shit. You really think you can satisfy him. You know nothing about him. I made him. And if you know what is best for you, you'll stay away from him."

I almost busted through the door, but Ana's voice arrested me. I understood immediately how she had become one of the most powerful business minds in the country. My girl was on fire.

"Let me give you some advice, Mrs. Lincoln. If you know what's best for you, you will be the one to keep your filthy cunt away from Christian. You will stop these threats against him. Yes, you evil nonce, I know about the threats. I know everything about you, you stupid pedo-bitch. So let me tell you what you're going to do, if you have half a brain in your head. You will take Esclava, which he is willing to gift you, and move on. You will stay the hell out of his life. Because let me tell you what is going to happen if you don't. Let me put it to you in simple language for your simple mind. You are going to lose everything you hold dear. You think I'm a gold digging slut, Mrs. Lincoln? That in itself proves that you know absolutely nothing about me. So let me tell you who I am. I am Anastasia Steele. I am the woman who loves Christian Grey, and I will do everything in my power to protect him. And that, you stupid bitch, is what a good Dominatrix does. She doesn't manipulate fifteen year old boys into thinking they're agreeing to being molested. She doesn't do her best to isolate him from his family so he becomes more dependent on her. She doesn't threaten him with exposure or try to control him by being his pimp. You are evil, Mrs. Robinson, and you are finished."

As soon as I heard Ana tell her what a good Dominatrix does, I knew exactly what I needed to do, and I needed to do it immediately.


	18. Chapter 18: Mrs Robinson (APOV)

**Chapter 18: Mrs. Robinson** _(Anastasia's POV)_

The nerve of this bitch! I was shocked that she chose to confront me at Christian's parents house, but now that she had, I had to respond. She wasn't only threatening Christian now, but she was also beginning to threaten me.

"Let me give you some advice, Mrs. Lincoln," I began, keeping my calm CEO persona. "If you know what's best for you, you will be the one to keep your filthy cunt away from Christian." I was surprised by my own audacity, but I maintained my calm composure.

Elena was speechless. She stared at me in shock, as I continued, " You will stop these threats against him. Yes, you evil nonce, I know about the threats. I know everything about you, you stupid pedo-bitch."

Her eyes widened at my insults, but she still just stared at me dumbly. And so I proceeded. "So let me tell you what you're going to do, if you have half a brain in your head. You will take Esclava and move on. You will stay the hell out of his life. Because let me tell you what is going to happen if you don't. Let me put it to you in simple language for your simple mind. You are going to lose everything you hold dear."

OK Ana, how are you going to do this? You can't make an idle threat without having a plan for making good on it. I wasn't sure yet about the how, but I knew I would find a way to destroy her if she didn't take my "advice."

I maintained my kick-ass CEO persona, never giving her an inkling that I wasn't sure about my threats, and I continued to look into her eyes, which were looking a bit shell-shocked. "You think I'm a gold digging slut, Mrs. Lincoln? That in itself proves that you know absolutely nothing about me. So let me tell you who I am. I am Anastasia Steele. I am the woman who loves Christian Grey and I will do everything in my power to protect him."

Holy shit, did I just tell the bitch that I love him? Well, crap. I didn't intend to let those words escape, especially to her, but then again, it felt like the right thing to say. I certainly meant them. And I knew, without taking a breath, what the next words I needed to say were. Take this, evil nonce!

"And that, you stupid bitch, is what a good Dominatrix does. She doesn't manipulate fifteen year old boys into thinking they're agreeing to being molested. She doesn't do her best to isolate him from his family so he becomes more dependent on her. She doesn't threaten them with exposure or try to control them by being their pimp. You are evil, Mrs. Robinson, and you are finished."

Before the bitch could say anything, if she even could, or before I could add another word, I heard the door open behind me. I turned to see my Dom, his eyes burning with rage, enter the room. Oh, shit, shit shit! How much of that did he hear? He closed the door quietly, locked it, and walked silently towards us. Oh, fuckity fuck fuck fuck! Mrs. Robinson wasn't the only one who was finished.

I held my breath as Christian came and stood in front of me, totally ignoring the bitch. And then, to my shock, he knelt before me, took my hand, and pressed it to his lips.

"Christian!" was all I could say.

"Please don't be displeased with me, Mistress," he said quietly, keeping his eyes downcast. "I shouldn't have left you alone. I should have stayed with you."

Oh my God! He was subbing! For me! Holy shit! I really didn't like that he was calling me "Mistress." Wasn't there a better way for a sub to address his Domme? I liked it when he called me princess. Couldn't that work both ways? Or maybe Goddess? Stop it, Ana! Christian was subbing for me, and I needed to get my act together.

I quickly composed myself, glanced at the pedo-bitch, whose jaw was now on the floor, and said to Christian, "I'm not displeased with you, Christian." Should I call him something else? What does a Domme usually call her sub? I had no idea, but I knew I liked it when he called me sweetheart. "I'm not at all displeased with you, sweetheart," I continued, stroking his head with my hand, hoping I looked believable. "I'm only displeased with your so-called friend here."

"She's not my friend, Mistress," Christian said bitterly. He still had not so much as glanced in her direction.

"Christian!" the bitch squealed. "You can't be serious! You're a Dom, God damn it. I made you one! You can't possibly be subbing for this mousy thing!"

Christian totally ignored her. He simply continued to look at the floor and waited for me to say something.

"Stand up, sweetheart," I said. I took his hand and led him to the couch. "Let's sit down, and I will explain to you what happened here with this pedo-bitch. And then we will go and get as far away from the filthy cunt as we can." Christian obediently sat next to me and kept his eyes downcast. We both continued to ignore Elena.

"She's nothing but a gold digger, Christian! She's not at all what you need!" Elena cried.

Christian's lips twitched. He was trying hard not to laugh, and so was I. The harder we tried, the harder it was to keep a serious face. Finally, we both started sniggering. "She doesn't even know who I am," I told him.

"I know, Mistress," Christian responded. "But I think she spends more time reading _Glamour_ than _Forbes_. If she can read at all."

I giggled at that, and Christian smiled widely but kept his head bowed submissively. God, he made an adorable sub.

I needed to sound more like a Domme, so I cleared my throat and said, "Look at me, Christian." Immediately, his eyes snapped towards mine, and I forced myself to remain calm. I proceeded, using my best CEO voice, "Your family will be looking for us, so let me give you a short synopsis, and then we can discuss it more later. Your... filthy cunt here... decided that she didn't like us together, so she thought she would threaten me. I explained to her that she is in no position to threaten me, and I let her know what would happen if she didn't stay the fuck away from both of us."

"You're full of shit," Elena spit at me. "You have no idea what I can do... to him and to you too, missy."

Christian kept his eyes fixed on my face, and he didn't react at all when I rolled my eyes at Elena's words. "No, you are the one who has no idea what I can do," I told her calmly. "Hell, you don't even know who I am. I suggest you find out. You can start with the August edition of _Forbes_. Or better yet, just google me, if you know how to use a computer. But never mind about that. I'm finished with this discussion, but before we go, let me just remind you of a couple of things, Mrs. Lincoln. Number one, Christian Grey is mine. He belongs to me. You have absolutely no claim on him. Number two, these threats you have made against him, to expose him with video footage that you illegally obtained... it all stops now. Believe me, Mrs. Lincoln, you don't want to find out what I can do to you if you don't stop all threats against Christian Grey. And number three, you will accept the agreement with Mr. Grey concerning Esclava salons. He will sign over this property to you in exchange for all of the remaining video footage that you may have, and I'm sure you know exactly which footage I'm referring to. If you make this agreement, and then it comes to light that you actually kept video footage with the intent to harm him, there will be hell to pay. And trust me, Mrs. Lincoln, I am not one to make idle threats. You will also agree to stay away from him. Absolutely no contact. You have one week to accept this offer from Mr. Grey. One week. After that, he will pull out all financial backing from Esclava Salons, whether you've accepted the offer or not. If you don't accept it, Esclava will be sold to the highest bidder."

Holy shit! Would Christian ever forgive me for setting this ultimatum? I knew he would never contradict me in front of her, but what would he say to me afterwards? The one thing I had been adamant about was that he was to never control me in business, but that was exactly what I was doing to him at the moment. I was certain that we would be spending some time in the playroom when we returned to Escala. I guessed I would be experiencing that punishment flogging that he'd mentioned the last time we were in there. I would take it like a good submissive. I was much more worried about damaging our relationship and the trust that had been so beautifully blossoming between us. How would I ever be able to make this up to him?

"You can't speak for him like this!" the bitch troll spit at me.

"I can, but I don't have to," I said with a shrug. "Have you considered the obvious? That he hasn't spoken to you simply because he doesn't want to?" I turned to Christian, and I'm sure he could see the fear and trepidation in my eyes, even though I was doing a pretty damn good job of playing the role of a Domme, enough to fool the bitch troll. "You have permission to speak to her, Christian. Say anything you like without any fear of punishment."

He smiled reassuringly at me. "Thank you, Mistress," he answered. "But you're right. I don't really want to talk to her, and I think you've done a pretty damn good job of communicating everything that needed to be said. Nevertheless, it would probably be best for me to make sure she understands that you're speaking for me, and that everything you said is absolutely accurate."

I nodded, feeling somewhat relieved, but I knew that I couldn't be sure everything was OK between us until we were alone together.

"Christian, you can't be serious!" she shouted.

"Lower your voice," he commanded her, sounding very much like the Dom that he is. "We are in my parents' home. And to respond to your idiotic outrage, yes, I am perfectly serious. You have heard my terms out of the mouth of the one person who may always speak on my behalf. Everything my Mistress has said is true. You have one week, Mrs. Lincoln. After that, if you have not agreed to my terms, Esclava will become the property of Anastasia Steele."

I glanced at Christian in shock, and he smirked at me.

"How can you do this?!" she continued to shout. "After all I've done for you?"

Christian rose to his feet, eyes full of rage. He stood directly in front of her, towering over her, and he spat at her, "After all you've done for me? What exactly is it that you think you have you done for me? You taught me to fuck. That's it. You've been manipulating me since I was fifteen years old, and I'm done. We are finished, Mrs. Robinson." Christian turned back towards me and took my hand in his. Without another word, we headed towards the door.

"You will regret this!" she shouted again. "Both of you will regret it!"

I spoke calmly as I told her, "He's offering to give you a business worth thousands and expecting very little from you in return. It's a very generous offer that I have no doubt you don't deserve. You should consider yourself lucky. After all you've done to him, he is being much more generous than most people would be."

"Fuck you!" was all she responded to me.

"Classy," I remarked as Christian opened the door for us to retreat.

We didn't get very far, because when Christian opened the door, we came face to face with both of his parents, Elliot and Kate. Grace was crying, and Carrick's face was red with rage. Elliot also looked so angry I was a little afraid of him.

Without speaking to either of us, Grace strode across the room and stood in front of her so-called friend. Before we knew what was happening, Grace had slapped her, hard, across the face. Then she slapped her again, on the other side of her face. "You bitch! I trusted you! I trusted you with my child! My child, Elena!" Grace screamed at her.

"Grace, this is all a misunderstanding!" Elena pleaded as she touched her face, where Grace's hand prints remained. "I can explain!"

"Get out!" Grace shouted. "You filthy whore, get out of my house right now!"

As if he had a second sense, Taylor appeared at the door. Christian instructed him, "Taylor, escort Mrs. Lincoln out. And make sure that all of the security here, at GEH, and at Escala know that she is on the proscribed list. Make that Ismintis too, just as a precaution."

"Yes, sir," Taylor replied. He took Elena by the arm and removed her from the room.

Christian looked shattered, and I felt sick to my stomach. No matter how insistent I had been about his needing to tell his parents about Elena, I would never have wanted them to find out like this. And I felt responsible. If I had not responded to Elena when she confronted me, and returned her threats with my own threats, we might not be here. Would Christian ever forgive me?

"I'm so sorry," I whispered to him.

"Shh..." he responded. "You have nothing to apologize for. None of this is your fault."

Carrick finally spoke for the first time since he'd entered the room. His calm tone was betrayed only by his still very red face. "Christian. I need you to help me understand. What exactly... What did Elena Lincoln do to you? I need to know, son."

Christian sighed. "I''ll tell you everything, Dad," he said. He sat down on the couch where we'd been sitting earlier, and he pulled me into his lap. He put his face in my hair and didn't speak again until everyone else was seated.

"Umm... I think I'll go find Mia," Kate said, mostly to Elliot.

"Yeah, thanks, babe," Elliot responded absently. He kissed her chastely on the lips before she left, closing the door behind her. Once Kate was gone, Elliot turned to Christian and asked, "You subbed for Elena Lincoln?"

"Yes," Christian answered quietly without lifting his head from my hair.

"What does that even mean?" Grace asked.

"They're talking about BDSM, Gracie," Carrick told her. "He subbed for her. He was her submissive."

"Whips and chains?" Grace asked innocently. "Like the Rihanna song?"

Christian groaned and lifted his head. "I never wanted to have this conversation. Ana has been pushing me for the past two days to tell you, but I insisted, no way in hell. Flynn too has been after me for years to tell you guys. But... I couldn't. I never wanted to hurt either of you. And I know how much I've disappointed you."

"Disappointed us, son?" Carrick questioned. "How can you think that? We are extremely proud of you. Good God, son, you're a billionaire at only 28 years old, and you did it without any help from us. You are a brilliant young man. I couldn't be prouder of you if I tried."

Christian stared at Carrick in shock. Then he cleared his throat and said, "You're not going to feel the same way after you hear about all this."

"I sincerely doubt that, son," Carrick responded. "But let's have it."

Grace and Carrick sat on the loveseat across from us, and Elliot sat on the other end of the couch we were sitting on. Christian took a deep breath, and then he proceeded to tell them everything, from the time that he was fifteen and Elena had seduced him while he was working for her in her back yard. He glossed over some of the details about the BDSM, but I'm sure they could read between the lines. They understood how she had taken advantage of his fear of touch and his anger issues.

Grace could not stop crying silently as she listened. Once Christian had gotten through that part of the story, she mournfully said, "Every time I told her something you'd done... something you'd gotten in trouble for at school... or at home... I gave her ammunition to beat you."

"Mom, don't," Christian pleaded. "None of it is your fault. There's no way you could have known. And I let her do it. I could have always stopped it, but I chose not to. I wanted..."

Carrick interrupted him, "No. Stop, son. Fifteen years old is below the age of consent, as you well know. Legally, you didn't have a choice, no matter how well she groomed you to think you did. What fifteen year old horny teenage boy would say no to sex, especially from a beautiful older woman? Especially a boy with your touch issues, who was being shown a way to get around them? You know full well that she manipulated you. Don't tell us you had a choice. I don't buy it."

Christian put his head in my hair again and groaned. Then he looked up at Carrick and said, "I know what you're thinking, Dad, and it's too late. I checked into it all two years ago. I'll get to that... but about the legal stuff, I can't press charges against her. It's past the statute of limitations deadline. It happened too long ago."

"Yes, Christian," Carrick replied, "I'm well aware of that. Don't worry though, we will find ways of making her pay for what she's done."

Christian sighed again, ran his fingers through his hair, and said sadly, "Before you start making any big plans in that regard, you may want to hear the rest of what I have to tell you."

"Let's have it then," Carrick said.

"When I went away to college, I was still under contract with her," Christian began.

"Under contract?" Grace asked.

"I was still her submissive," Christian explained. "I had been for four years by that point in time, so it was going into the fifth year. And as you know, I hated Harvard. I wanted to control my own life. I wanted to start my business. And I also wanted to end my contract with her. I didn't want to be a submissive any more. I wanted to be a Dominant."

"Like her?" Grace asked.

"Yes, like her," Christian affirmed. "When I came back home that Spring Break, and you guys refused to loan me the capital to start GEH, she did. And she also agreed to end our contract and train me as a Dominant."

"Wait," Elliot interrupted. "Elena Lincoln loaned you the money to start GEH?"

"Yes, a hundred grand. I paid her back within a year, so it was interest free," Christian answered.

Grace suddenly stood up and began to pace the room. "Damn, damn, damn!" She exclaimed. "That bitch! I want to rip her to pieces!"

"Mom!" Elliot exclaimed.

Grace spoke to the room in general. "While she was fucking our son, and loaning him money that I'm sure she stole from her husband, now ex-husband, she was advising us not to loan him the money!" She turned and looked at Christian, who was watching her, wide-eyed. "She said that you'd been drinking, that she was worried you were going to become an alcoholic. She said you were slacking in your college classes, not going to class, not taking anything seriously. I let her manipulate me too, damn it! All that tough love shit was her idea!"

"We both listened to her, Gracie," Carrick said. "I'm sorry, son," he told Christian. "I was so convinced that you'd need your degree to be successful. I let her play me too... Remember, Gracie, how much she lamented not having her own degree? But behind our backs, she was encouraging our son to drop out. Unbelievable!"

"There's no need to apologize," Christian said. "I didn't realize at the time, but I do now, that she was trying to alienate me from you guys so I'd depend more on her. It worked. I'm not at all surprised that she lied to you."

"So... Elena trained you to be a Dom?" Elliot asked. He sounded a little hurt.

Christian looked Elliot in the eyes and answered, "Yes, El, I've been a Dom since I returned home from Harvard. Since I was twenty years old."

"I thought..." Elliot started to say, but then he stopped himself. I'm sure he didn't want to out himself to Grace and Carrick.

"Yeah, I know, El. I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Christian responded. Then he turned back to Carrick and said, "There's more you have to know. Elena is blackmailing me. Or at least she has been. I'm not sure where we stand now with all that."

"How, son?" Carrick asked.

Christian paused before he answered. "There's no easy way to tell you any of this. Just know, I never intended to hurt either of you."

"Christian, damn it, just spit it out," Carrick said. "You're our son. We love you. Nothing you say or do could ever change that."

Christian shifted me in his lap so he could hold me tighter. He laced his fingers through mine and stared at our hands as he answered, "Elena matched me with my first submissives. There were thirteen women over the course of five years. I didn't know it at the time, but she paid each of them to video at least one of our scenes, and I believe she still has copies of those videos, even though I've gone to great effort over the past two years to get them from her."

"You had them all sign NDAs?" Carrick asked.

"Of course, Dad," Christian replied. "And everything we did was consensual. I'm not worried about any potential legal action, or about any of my former subs going to the tabloids. I ended on good terms with all of them. I'm only worried about Elena. If she releases those videos, it could do irreparable damage. It could destroy me."

"I don't understand, Christian," Grace said. "You're an attractive single young billionaire. Seattle's most eligible bachelor, so the tabloids say. Why would anyone be surprised that you have a sex life? Of course we don't want the sex videos to be made public, but why would it destroy you?"

Christian groaned again as he rubbed his face and then ran his fingers through his hair. He glanced at me, held me tighter, and muttered, "I can't believe I'm having this conversation with my mother." Then he looked up at Grace and said, as calmly as possible, "They're not just sex videos, Mom." He swallowed, and then continued, "They're BDSM sex videos. I'm not just... having sex with these women. I'm tying them up and whipping them, or flogging them, or beating them. I'm sure I look like a monster. That's all the media will see, if they get out."

Grace looked shocked. "These... women... They just... let you beat them? You said it was consensual. Please, tell me it was consensual, Christian."

"Yes, Mom, I promise you it was always consensual," he assured her.

"Why would any woman...?" Grace started to say, but then she looked at me uncomfortably, and stopped speaking.

I'm sure my blush was telling, but I ignored the heat I felt on my face, cleared my throat, and finally spoke for the first time since this conversation had begun. "Christian is no monster, I can assure you of that. And he only beat women who wanted to feel pain, who had very clear agreements with him, with very clear terms and expectations. I know it sounds crazy if you are not in the BDSM lifestyle, but there are many people, both men and women, who enjoy pain, and they desire to receive that pain from people like Christian, who are skilled at inflicting it without bringing any real harm."

I watched as several emotions danced across Grace's face, from disgust, to relief, to curiosity, back to disgust, and then to concern. "So Ana... are you...? Do you...?

I smiled at her reassuringly. "Am I Christian's sub?" I looked at him and smiled sweetly. "Only when we play. And I enjoy it immensely. Oh, and I'm not sure what all you heard when you were standing out in the hallway, but I can assure you... I'm certainly not his Domme. But after the confrontation we just had with her today, Elena Lincoln thinks I am, and I would prefer to keep it that way."

"Agreed," Christian said. "Ana was incredible. Did you hear her telling off that bitch?"

"Yeah, we heard enough," Elliot answered. He glanced at me, but quickly looked away. He was blushing. Damn it! Would things always be awkward between him and me? And Kate had told me earlier, to my great shock, that she's in love with him. I wasn't at all comfortable with him being attracted to me, if that's what this was.

"So what are we going to do about Elena?" Grace asked. "There must be a way to prevent her from releasing the videos. I mean other than giving in to her blackmail demands."

"Two years ago, when all of this came to light, I offered to give her Esclava, which I co-own with her, but she refused because she wanted to keep a tight leash on me. I have just repeated this offer... well, in a matter of speaking. I offered to trade Esclava for the videos she still has... and for her to stay away from me. Hopefully, she will accept my offer and move on."

I was relieved that Christian presented this plan to his parents as his idea, but still concerned that it wouldn't be enough for the bitch troll. "You really think she'll go quietly?" I asked Christian skeptically.

"No, but one can hope," he answered. "I'd prefer to have more leverage."

Elliot cleared his throat and ran his fingers through his hair in a move that looked very similar to Christian when he's nervous. "Mom, Dad, there's something I need to tell you guys. I..."

Christian interrupted him, "Elliot, there's no reason why they need to know."

Elliot gave Christian a pointed look. "It's not what you're thinking." He cleared his throat again. "When I was fourteen or fifteen... I forget exactly, Elena Lincoln tried to seduce me too. Christian wasn't the only one."

"What!?" Christian shouted.

"Oh holy hell," Grace muttered under her breath. "I want to kill her."

"I didn't have sex with her, and I didn't know she was into BDSM," Elliot explained. "She just... flirted with me, and told me she could teach me things that would drive girls wild. I was tempted... I mean, who wouldn't be, at that age? But I had a girlfriend at the time, and I hadn't had sex yet. I didn't want a cougar to be my first. I wanted my girlfriend to be my first, and she was. So anyway, Mrs. Lincoln kept flirting with me for a while after that, but when I kept ignoring her, she finally gave up."

"Shit!" Christian exclaimed. "I thought I was the only one. She made me believe..."

"I'm sure she did, Christian," Carrick said. "That's a typical thing that child molesters do to their victims. Make them feel special."

"There's more," Elliot said.

"I'm not sure how much more I can handle," Grace said.

"No, not more like that," Elliot said, "just more about my interactions with her. A couple of years later, when Christian was fifteen I guess, I noticed her behaving weird towards him, and I confronted her. She swore to me, practically on the Bible, that there was nothing going on between them. She was convincing. Then I asked Christian, and he was just as convincing. Do you remember that, bro?"

"Not really," Christian answered. "But I don't doubt it happened. I got pretty good at lying about her."

Elliott continued, "So, like I said earlier, I didn't know she was into BDSM, and I knew that with Christian's touch issues, sex would be... challenging. So I took them at their word. If I had been less trusting, I might have figured out what they were doing. I could have prevented..."

"No, Elliot, just stop it," Christian interrupted. "What's done is done. There's nothing any of you could have done. The blame rests entirely on me."

"No, it doesn't," I told him. "It rests entirely on Elena Lincoln."

"The reason why I thought I should tell you..." Elliot began, "If she came onto me and then seduced Christian when we were around the same age, who's to say she hasn't done the same with other kids? It may be too late for Christian to press charges, but maybe..." Elliot trailed off.

"Oh, holy hell," Grace said. "She volunteers with Coping Together."

"We'll have to put a stop to that, Gracie," Carrick told her.

"Yes, I know," she replied.

"Have you had her investigated?" Carrick asked Christian.

"Not like that," Christian answered. "I was so sure I was... Well, anyway, I've had her audited repeatedly. I'm confident that she hasn't embezzled any money from me. But about the other... I don't know. She kept me pretty well hidden. It will be harder to uncover if she's had other underage submissives. But I'll put someone on it."

"Could you bug her dungeon?" I asked him. "Have you thought about putting a secret camera in there? You know, an eye for an eye?"

"I like how you think, princess," Christian told me. "I didn't consider it before because I honestly believed that I was the only underage submissive she'd ever had, and I had no reason to spy on her with other subs. Now... it's worth a try. But we wouldn't be able to use the footage legally. Would we, Dad?"

"I don't know, Christian," Carrick answered. "Depends on what we uncover, what kind of footage it is, how we want to use it... a lot of factors."

"So you're saying it's possible?" I asked Carrick.

"I'm saying maybe," Carrick answered. "But I'm not encouraging you to break any laws to do it, Christian."

"Understood, Dad," Christian said. "When I hire someone to break into her house to bug her sex dungeon, I will make sure that you know nothing about it. And you didn't hear me just say that."

"Say what, son?" Carrick asked innocently.

Grace walked across the room to the wet bar. "Would anyone else like a glass of wine?" she offered. "I haven't been drunk in thirty years, but I think I just may get drunk tonight. Good thing I have tomorrow off work."

"I'll take one, Mom," Elliot said. "Whatever you're having is fine."

Christian and I both declined. "I think Ana and I need to go soon," Christian said. "We still have things we need to talk about. Not to mention that we both also have empires to run."

When we left a few minutes later, Grace was already on her second glass of wine, and Carrick was finishing off his bottle of brandy with Elliot and Kate. I was glad that Christian had gotten Taylor to drive us, so we could both ride in the back of Christian's SUV.

For the first half of our car ride, we were both silent. Christian held my hand and stroked it absently as he stared out the window, and I left him alone, realizing that he needed time to process what had just happened. Finally, about twenty minutes into the trip home, he squeezed my hand and gave me his award winning smile.

"You make one hell of a Dominatrix," he said.

I felt my face heat, but I wasn't sure he could see it.

"Anastasia, are you blushing?" he teased.

I answered him, "Christian, I was so worried. I'm still worried. I didn't mean to say all those things to her... it just slipped out. My God, I gave her an ultimatum. I had no business doing that."

Christian continued to smile at me. "Yes, you did. And it was hot. So hot. And I'm not the least bit offended, so quit worrying. But I'm just wondering, princess. Well, there are a few things I'm wondering, actually. First of all... did you like it? Being a Domme, I mean?"

I felt my blush growing deeper. "Ummm... I... I liked making her think I was your Domme."

"So did I," Christian said. "I loved seeing the look of shock on her face. God, you were amazing, baby."

"But..." I continued, "I didn't like being called Mistress. I don't like it. I'm not your Mistress. That sounds like a kept woman from the nineteenth century. I don't get why Dommes like being called that."

Christian smirked at me. "What would you prefer that I call you?" he asked.

"I like princess," I told him.

"Not really powerful enough for a Dominatrix," he answered.

"Well, I thought about Goddess," I quipped.

He snorted. "OK, Goddess. The next time I bow before you, Goddess it will be."

I cleared my throat. "Umm... Christian, there doesn't need to be a next time. We were just pretending, so we could fuck with the pedo-bitch. It was not only fun, but also a good way to get her to leave you alone... by convincing her that you answer to someone else now. She doesn't respect you enough to realize that you don't need her or me or anyone else to answer to. You are in control, and that's the way I want it. I don't want to be your Domme. I like our power dynamics as they are."

Christian studied my face for a moment. "Are you sure you aren't a switch, princess? Because it seems to me that being a Domme comes natural to you when the occasion calls for it. I think what you did today was instinctive. You went with your gut, like you usually do in business. I'm not so sure that you were just pretending."

"Christian, I don't want to be your Domme," I insisted. I wondered why he was pushing me. I knew he didn't want to give up control.

"OK, princess, if you say so," he conceded. "But just know this... regardless of what I've told you recently... I think I could see myself subbing for you again. So if you change your mind and think that you might be a switch... I'd be willing to play. I'm not saying all the time. I still prefer being a Dom. Well, at least I think I do. The truth is, I've never subbed for anyone except for her until today. Surprisingly, I kind of liked it."

I was utterly shocked. All of that with Elena Lincoln had only been pretending, right? "Christian... what are you saying? You want to play... with me as the... You want me to tie you up? You want me to do to you what we watched Kate do to Elliot?"

Christian laughed at me. "Princess, I wish you could see the look on your face," he said. "But I can't blame you for being surprised after I've been so clear about always being the one in control."

"Christian, you're not thinking clearly," I insisted. "After you've cleared your mind from everything that you just went through, you're not going to think the same way about this. You're a Dom."

"No, my mind is pretty clear right now, Anastasia. You were right, by the way, about how you thought my parents would respond. You told me I was reading it wrong, and you were right. Another reason why I trust you so much. I'm OK, really. Surprisingly OK. And to answer your question, I think that you'd be much more... creative... than Kavanagh. It would be fun. But if you don't like the idea, we never have to go there. I'm happy topping you."

Thankfully, I didn't have to respond to Christian because we arrived at Escala. So instead of responding to what he'd just said, I asked, "You want to come up to my place this time? We haven't spent much time there."

"Sure," Christian agreed.

A few minutes later, we were sitting on the floor in front of my gas fireplace, with our backs resting against my sofa, sipping glasses of Chardonnay. For a couple of minutes, neither of us said anything. We both watched the flames in the logs.

After a couple of minutes, Christian cleared his throat, looked at me and said, "Anastasia, I need to know. Did you mean everything you told her today?"

"Who, the bitch troll?" I asked to buy time. I was afraid I knew exactly what he was referring to, and now I was worried. But there was no denying it. I hadn't meant to say it, but I'd meant what I said. It was time to come clean. Even though I knew it probably meant the end of us. Christian had made it so clear that he didn't do love.

"Yes, you know that's who I'm referring to," he answered.

I still felt the need to buy time. I felt so nervous all of a sudden. "Well, I didn't mean it when I implied that I was your Domme. I mean, I wanted her to believe it, even though it wasn't true. I did it to protect you. So, yes, I think you were right earlier when you said it was instinctive. But I don't want to be your Domme, Christian."

"OK, princess. But that wasn't what I was referring to. What about the rest of what you said to her?" he asked.

I decided to stop avoiding what he was really asking me. It was time to bite the bullet."Yes, Christian, I meant every word I said to her," I answered. I'm sure he could see and hear how nervous I was.

"Mmm hmm, that's what I thought," Christian said. He leaned over and kissed me tenderly. Then he looked in my eyes and said, "When I heard what you told her... Anastasia, you have no idea what it did to me to hear those words. In fact, I'd give any amount of money, my right arm, my eye, my kidney, you name it... just to hear you say those words again."

"Christian, are you sure?" I asked. "I didn't mean... I mean, I meant what I said, but I didn't mean to say it, especially not to her. It's so soon. We only just met."

"Anastasia, I'm sure. Please? It's true that we only just met, but you know me, baby. How often do you think I say please?"

I laughed. "Umm, never?"

"You got it, princess. But will you please say it again? Come on, I'll start it off for you. 'Let me tell you who I am. I am Anastasia Steele...'" Christian held his breath expectantly.

I looked in his eyes, and I felt tears in mine when I answered, "I am the woman who loves Christian Grey, and I will do everything in my power to protect him."

Christian responded by pulling me into his lap, and attacking my lips. It was the most passionate kiss that we'd had so far.

"I need to be inside you," Christian said when we finally came up for air.

"Yes, Christian. Fuck me, please."

"Anastasia, I don't want to fuck you tonight," Christian responded.

"You don't?" I asked.

"Nope," he answered before he gave me another lingering kiss. "I don't want to fuck you. I want to make love with you."

I felt tears in my eyes, but I tried to make a joke. "Are you sure you won't find vanilla too boring?" I asked.

"There's nothing boring about vanilla," he answered. "Especially not vanilla with you. Nothing with you could ever be boring."

I blinked my eyes to avoid the tears that I felt there. "OK, Christian," I answered breathlessly as I stood up, took his hand, and led him towards my bedroom. "I want to spend the rest of the night making love with you." I want spend the rest of my life making love with you, I wanted to say.

Within mere seconds, we were both naked in my bed, kissing passionately. After a couple of minutes, Christian broke the kiss, looked me in the eyes, and asked, "Anastasia?"

"Yes, Christian?" I asked, looking at him expectantly.

"I think I need to introduce myself to you too," he said. He kissed my nose before he continued, "So let me tell you who I am. I'm Christian Grey. I'm the man who loves Anastasia Steele. And I'll do everything in my power to protect her."

For the first time that I can remember, I giggled and cried at the same time. I couldn't keep the tears back this time, but I also couldn't stop the giggle that burst forth at his declaration. His words were so powerful but so damn cute at the same time. I kissed his nose in return before I whispered. "That was so cheesy. And so perfect."

"I love you, Anastasia," Christian said as he wiped my tears away with his thumbs. "I love you so fucking much."

I responded by wrapping my legs around him, pulling him as close to me as I could, and kissing him with all the passion that I felt for him.

We had the best vanilla sex of our lives until the wee hours of the morning, and Christian was right; there was nothing boring about it.


	19. Chapter 19: Manic Monday Morning (CPOV)

**Chapter 19: Monday Morning** _(Christian's POV)_

For the third morning in a row, I woke up after a good night's sleep, having had no nightmares, in the arms of my beautiful angel. She was nuzzling my chest, just as she had been the past two mornings, and I no longer felt shocked by it. I felt happier than I could ever remember. This was home. Anastasia was my home.

"Mmm... Christian," she mumbled as she began to rouse. When I pulled her closer to me, she nuzzled me more, and rubbed my chest with her hand. Then suddenly, her eyes popped open and she sat up quickly. "Oh my God, I'm sorry, Christian! Did I hurt you?"

"Come here, princess," I said as I pulled her back towards me so her head was resting on my chest again. "It doesn't hurt. It feels good."

"Christian... are you sure?" she asked, still sounding really worried.

"I promise, princess," I assured her. "I didn't tell you earlier because... well, I had a lot to process."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Remember Saturday morning, how... emotional I was?"

"Of course. It was your first time to have vanilla," she recalled.

"Yes, but before that... Do you know what prompted me to make love with you?" I asked.

She smiled beautifully as she remembered our declarations of love from the previous night."Umm... you were already secretly in love with me?"

"Well, yeah, there is that," I conceded, and I stopped to kiss her lips tenderly. Then I leaned back and continued to explain, "But there's more than just that. It was because of what happened before you woke up."

She reminded me, "You said you'd never slept that long before and that I was your dream catcher."

I nodded. "Yeah, well, there were a couple of other things that happened too. It wasn't just that I had slept so late. When I woke up, your head was on my chest, just like it is now." I took her hand and placed it over my heart. "And your hand was right here. And then, you nuzzled my chest, just like you did before you woke up this morning. You did the same thing yesterday too. Anastasia, nobody has ever touched my chest like this with their hand, much less with their lips. And it feels amazing. I can't even describe how good it feels."

"I had no idea, Christian," she said.

"Yeah, I know," I responded. "You also had no idea what you said in your sleep."

She buried her face in my chest at that, and I loved it. "I hate that I talk in my sleep," she said.

"I fucking love that you talk in your sleep," I told her.

"What did I say?" she asked cautiously.

I imitated her voice as I answered, "Christian, oh, Christian, I love you, Christian."

"Oh, my God," she mumbled into my chest.

I continued to imitate her. "Christian, I'll always be yours."

She raised her head and looked in my eyes. "I said all that?"

"Mmm hmm," I answered smugly.

She rolled her eyes, earning a smack on her ass from me. She ignored it and told me, "I spent the entire day yesterday trying hard not to tell you, not to use the L word. And then, I had to let it slip to Elena fucking Lincoln. Little did I know... you already knew."

"Well, I didn't... it's not the same if you say it in your sleep. I needed to hear you say it when you were awake. But why were you trying not to tell me?"

"God, I was so afraid, Christian," she confessed. "I thought you'd want to get rid of me if you knew I was in love with you. You made it so clear that you don't do love, and that you ended things with your subs when they..."

I interrupted her, "Anastasia, when will you get it through your head that you're not my fucking sub? That contract we signed is just for the playroom, nothing more, and it was really just so we'd know each other's limits. That's all. I love you, Ana. I'm not sure when I would have had the courage to tell you until you gave me the courage last night. It's true, I didn't think I could do love. You've turned my entire world on its head in just a matter of three days."

She smiled an award winning smile at me, making me fall just a little bit deeper in love with her. "So, Christian Grey does do hearts and flowers after all," she quipped.

I sniggered. "You should have realized that Friday morning when I sent you that bouquet of daisies."

She giggled. "I guess there's a first time for everything."

"Mmm hmm," I answered. "You should have seen Andrea's face when I gave her the instructions. Utter shock."

"I can only imagine," Ana responded. "And I feel sorry for her having to bring you my response. I hope you didn't take it out on her."

I laughed. "There was nothing to take out on her. I wasn't angry. I was even more intrigued and more determined to have you. 'Go to Hell' had never sounded sexier."

She laughed with me. "Tell me the truth, was that really the first time you've ever sent flowers to a woman?"

"Other than my mom, yes. Anastasia, I've enjoyed so many firsts with you already, in just a few days." I considered my next words for a second before I went ahead and said them. "And I have a new goal in life, to enjoy a new first with you everyday for the rest of our lives."

She stared at me in shock. Yes, princess, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I knew it was too soon to tell her that, though. So instead, I said, "You know, princess, as much as I would love to spend the rest of today in this bed with you, we both have work, and it's getting late. It's almost seven already."

Anastasia groaned. "I need to check my email to see if Samantha found anything on Jack yet. God, I dread this."

After spending the entire day Saturday away from email, Ana and I both had spent most of Sunday morning catching up on work. One of the first things Ana had done was check in on Samantha Gilbert, who was to Ana what Barney Sullivan was to me, and to direct her to take a closer look at Jack Hyde. Ana could not get their strange conversation from Friday afternoon out of her mind, and her gut told her that Jack Hyde was her mole. I trusted my girl's gut, so I had already ordered my own background check on Jack Hyde. Ana was now mine to protect, and that included finding out about this threat against her at Ismintis. If Hyde turned out to be her mole, he would be hearing from more than just her. I had a few choice words for him myself.

"I just don't get what his motive would be," I said as I opened my own email on my phone and saw that Hyde's background check was there. I would look at it after I got to the office. "What could he possibly have to gain by sabotaging your deals or by giving me your secrets? It doesn't make sense unless he has some kind of personal vendetta against you."

She multitasked, talking to me while she checked her emails on her phone and responded to a couple of them. "I didn't even know him until I hired him. The first time we met was at his job interview. He's strange, but he's always done good work. We've always gotten along well enough. So I agree, it doesn't make sense." She looked up from her phone and added, "Samantha has information on Jack, and she wants to meet with us this morning at GEH. I knew we were going to meet with your former employee... Mr. Henry... there this morning at what, 10 a.m.? So I asked Samantha to be there at 8:30. I also suggested to her yesterday that we have any meetings about my security problems at GEH until we determine that Ismintis is secure. I hope you don't mind. And yes, I said 'us.' She said she found something that she believes I will want to share with you."

I was happy that she felt safe at GEH and that she wanted my help solving her problem, but confused about why her IT girl wanted me to be involved. "Something about Hyde that you'll want to share specifically with me? Why would she think you'd want to share confidential information about your COO with the CEO of GEH?"

"I have no idea," she answered. "I'm just as curious about that as you are."

"We need to get going then," I suggested. "You know we'll save time and water if we shower together."

She closed her email as she smirked at me. "I'm sure that's your main motivation, right, saving time and water? There wouldn't be any other reason why you want to shower with me, would there?"

"Why, Ms. Steele, whatever do you mean?" I questioned, pretending to be shocked, which earned a giggle. I wished I could bottle that sound.

"Come on, Mr. Grey," she responded as she got up and sashayed buck naked into her bathroom. She looked back over her shoulder at me and added, "My shower isn't quite as big as yours, but it's just as nice. Hurry up, we're burning daylight."

Twenty minutes later, I had fucked Anastasia thoroughly against her shower wall, and we were finishing up in the shower. "I'm glad you had Taylor bring your clothes over last night," Ana told me. "I'd hate for you to have to wear your dirty clothes down my elevator to the lobby and back up your elevator. I'll be glad when Elliot puts in the door."

"I'm glad to hear you say that," I said. "But now that we're on the topic of Elliot... Do you think you're ever going to feel comfortable around him?"

She sighed. "I don't know. I hope so. Maybe it's best if we don't go to any more play parties if he's going to be there. It worries me that he might be attracted to me when Kate..." She trailed off.

Now I had to hear what she was going to say. "When Kate... what?"

"OK, don't repeat this, because I'm not sure how many people she wants to know yet. Kate told me she's in love with him. I've never seen her like this... She's never used the L word before, and now... yesterday, she was acting all googly-eyed and girly. She's got it bad for him. And I'm worried that she's going to get hurt, because Elliot seems to... well, I don't know. You and your sister both have acknowledged that he's a man whore. Plus, he gives me mixed signals. He seems interested in me, and that makes me really uncomfortable."

I turned off the shower, wrapped a towel around her, and then grabbed another towel for myself before I responded to her. Inwardly, I was relieved. "You don't need to worry about Elliot," I told her. "He's not going to hurt Kate. He's head over heals in love with her too. And it's the first time I've ever seen him like this too."

"Are you sure?" she asked.

I assured her, "Last night, he professed his undying love for her both to me and to Dad. He's convinced that they're going to get married."

"Oh, thank God!" Ana responded. "Kate didn't mention marriage, but I could tell she was thinking in that direction. It's hard to imagine... Kate, married! But she was so different yesterday. I think maybe she's met her match."

As we both started getting dressed, I explained to her, "About the other thing you're concerned about... I think Elliot finds you attractive. Who wouldn't? You're gorgeous."

Ana looked at me, clearly shocked. "And that doesn't bother you, even a little?"

"It would bother me if he were a threat, but he isn't. He's not interested in anything serious with you. He just wants to play, and I won't allow it. Case closed."

"What are you saying, Christian?" she asked, looking worried. "Does Elliot want to do a scene with me? Did he tell you that?"

"What I'm saying is that Elliot is a kinky bastard, and Kate obviously is too. I think what you're sensing is Elliot's desire to play with you, with Kate's permission. And mine too, of course, but don't worry, it's never going to happen, because I don't share."

"Christian, if you're telling me this to try to help me feel more comfortable around him, it's not working. I don't want to even think about playing with Elliot. And I'm not comfortable with him, knowing that these ideas are going on in his mind when he's around me. How can you think he's in love with Kate if he wants to have sex with me?"

I sighed. How could I explain my brother's kinky mindset to Ana? I knew what was going on in his head, and it wasn't what she was worried about. "What I'm trying to tell you is that I don't think these ideas will be going on in his mind any more after I nipped them in the bud yesterday. He's not interested in you, Ana. He only wants Kate. He was only interested in playing, just for fun. And I won't have it. So that's the end of it."

She continued to look at me with worry and suspicion. "What exactly did you nip in the bud yesterday?" she asked.

I was beginning to regret even bringing this up. I explained to her, "I wasn't going to tell you about this, but I think it will help you better understand Elliot's frame of mind. And Kate's too, for that matter. There are a lot of committed couples in the lifestyle who like to play with others just for fun. Elliot went so far as to suggest group play with me yesterday. The kinky fucker wants to see you and Kate together."

"What!?" she cried. "Kate... and me!? You've got to be kidding. I've never... I would never..."

She was amusing the hell out of me again. "Ana, calm down. I wasn't suggesting you would. And even if you would, I would never allow it. I don't share."

"Holy shit!" Ana said, almost ignoring me. "Do you think they actually discussed it? Kate and... me?"

"I'm sure they did," I answered. "Elliot said Kate was open to the idea."

"Kate was open to the idea of having sex with me? Christian, why are you telling me this? I was already uncomfortable around Elliot, and now I'm going to be uncomfortable around Kate too. And she's my best friend!" Her voice was getting higher pitched.

We were both fully dressed now, and Ana was trying to do her make-up, although she was having trouble focusing on it, while I tied my tie. I turned to her, put my hands on her shoulders, sighed, and said, "I keep forgetting how new you are to the lifestyle, princess. Stop worrying about Kate. She doesn't want to fuck you. I'm sure that she only agreed to it for Elliot's sake. All men, and especially kinky shits like Elliot, love the idea of watching two hot women go down on each other. And you're new to this. You're just beginning to let your kink out. So I'm sure Kate didn't know whether you'd be open to the idea or not."

Ana studied me for a moment. She straightened my tie, and then she looked in my eyes and asked, "Do you want to watch me and Kate go down on each other?"

I held her eye contact as I answered, "Hell no, I don't. How many times do I need to repeat this? I don't share. Nobody is going to go down on you except me." Ana looked relieved, but then I continued. "If I'm honest, I wouldn't mind watching Kate with some other hot woman though."

She looked shocked again. Shit! Me and my big mouth. Why couldn't I just leave it alone?

"So you're attracted to Kate?" she asked.

"No, Ana, I have absolutely no desire to fuck her. But she's hot, yes, I'll give her that. There's a difference between appreciating a woman's beauty and wanting to fuck her. Why are you surprised, princess? You enjoyed the play party as much as I did. We're both voyeurs, admit it. It's fun to watch other people fuck, and it helps if they're attractive. It doesn't mean I want to fuck any of them, and I know you don't either."

"I still can't get over the idea of Kate wanting to do that... with me."

"Ana... honestly, I suspect she was more interested in bringing me into their scene, and she was only including you for Elliot's benefit... and mine. Just let it go, OK?"

"What? Really?" Ana looked shocked...again. Shit! I just kept digging the hole deeper.

"Ana... princess... Shit! You're just too damn innocent! How the hell has Kavanagh not corrupted you more than this by now?"

"So you think Kate wants to fuck you?" Ana asked incredulously.

I cleared my throat and ran my fingers through my hair before I answered. "I think that Kate enjoys playing. I think... at least it seems reasonable to assume... that she and Elliot are committed to each other, if what you said about her feelings is true. I'm sure about his feelings for her. So I expect that they would never go behind each other's back to be with anyone else, and they don't want to make the kind of commitment to anyone else that they apparently want to make with each other. With that said, I think that they both would enjoy bringing others that they aren't committed to into their scene, just for fun. And if Elliot told her anything about the shit that he and I have done together in the past, she was probably interested. If she likes group sex, then I'm sure she enjoys being DPed. But I sure as hell am not going to be the one to..."

"Do I even want to know what that is?" Ana asked tiredly. I think she was getting as fed up with this conversation as I already was.

"Double penetrated, Ana," I said dryly.

"Oh," was all she responded. Her blush was adorable.

"You're going to enjoy it, princess. I promise. You're going to enjoy it a lot."

Once again, I'd shocked her. She was wide-eyed when she said, "Christian, you said you don't share. You said..."

I put my finger to her lips and said, "Shhh... Ana... Take a deep breath. I promise you, I will NEVER share you. It's a hard limit, remember? The only cock that I ever want in your sweet pussy or ass is mine."

She looked relieved but confused. "Well, then, how the hell..."

I interrupted her, "With a dildo, of course. Preferably a vibrating one in your pussy while I fuck your ass."

"Oh," she said again.

"Feel better?" I asked.

She nodded. She was quiet for a minute as she finished pinning up her hair, and I just watched her. When she was finished, I said, "Come on, princess. We need to eat breakfast before we leave, and it's getting late."

When we went into Ana's kitchen, I was surprised to find Gail there. She looked at Ana apologetically. "I hope you don't mind, Ms. Steele, but I got Mr. Sawyer to let me in. I thought that you and Mr. Grey could use a good breakfast."

Ana laughed, showing her surprise. "No, Gail, I don't mind your being here at all, but I do mind being called Ms. Steele. It's Ana. And all of this is unnecessary... but appreciated."

Gail already had omelets and toast for both of us. "I hope omelets are OK for both of you," Gail said. "I knew you'd be in a rush, so I went ahead..."

"That's great, Gail," I told her, and Ana thanked her again. Gail also had coffee ready for me, and tea for Ana. Once she had placed everything in front of us, she left us alone.

Ana ate quietly for a couple of minutes, and I could see that she was deep in thought. Finally, she looked at me and asked, "So... do you think this will come up again with them? Kate and Elliot, I mean."

"No, I'm sure it won't," I answered, trying to reassure her. "Like I said, I nipped it in the bud with Elliot yesterday. I doubt Kate gave it any serious consideration. If she had, she would have realized it wouldn't work. Even if I were open to the idea, which I'm not, it would only work if she's a switch, and she doesn't strike me as a switch."

"No, she's definitely not a switch," Ana agreed.

"And neither am I, in general." I told her. "I'd only consider it with you, ever. And while it's possible to find Doms who are willing to do group play involving other Doms, I'm not one of them. I need control too much. I can't share it. You're the only one I'd ever consider sharing control with. I'd let you tie me up, baby."

Ana's eyes lit up in humor. "That could be fun," she said, but then she looked serious. "Christian, please stop, OK? I don't want to have this conversation again... You said enough in the car last night. I did enjoy pretending with the bitch troll. It was fun. But that's all it was for me... pretending. I don't want to control you. That would just be... wrong. I'm not a switch. At least, I don't think I am. I love having control in every other area of life, but I love giving up control to you just as much."

I smiled at her. "You are a very powerful woman, though, princess. That's true all the time, whether you're being the genius CEO that you are or you're submitting to me in our playroom. And I have no doubt in my mind that you're going to kick Hyde's ass, if he turns out to be your mole."

"Oh, God, Christian, it makes me sick to even think about it. I'm going to have to decide this morning... if what I expect to happen happens... do I fire him immediately, or do I wait to see what he's up to? I guess it will depend on what Samantha has found."

"Well, let's go find out," I said, and we left. Taylor drove us in my Q7 while Sawyer followed us in Ana's Tesla. The paparazzi were circling like vultures around the entrances of both Escala and GEH, but we were able to avoid them by going directly to the garage at Escala and then using the service entrance at GEH.

When we got to my office, Samantha was already there waiting with us, chatting with Andrea. I motioned for her to follow Ana and me into my office. Andrea brought coffee for Samantha and me, and tea for Ana.

As soon as Andrea had closed the door behind her as she exited, Ana asked Samantha, "So, is it him?"

Samantha nodded. "Yeah, it's him. Without a doubt."

"Shit," said Ana.

"Ms. Gilbert, I just want to be sure..." I started to say.

"Samantha, please, Mr. Grey," she corrected me.

"Samantha, are you certain that my presence is needed for this discussion? It seems more appropriate for you to have a private conversation with your CEO, and I would be happy to give you both this space."

"No, Christian, I want you here," Ana said.

"Mr. Grey, I found files on Mr. Hyde's personal computer that concern you too. You are going to want to know this, trust me, sir." As she spoke, she opened her laptop that she'd brought with her and started looking through a list that she had compiled.

"Concern me how?" I asked. "Are you saying that he was hacking into GEH and stealing information from us while he was also sending us audio files containing confidential information from Ismintis? That makes no sense."

"No, sir, that's not what I'm saying at all," she answered. "As far as I can tell, he hasn't hacked into GEH. The files he has are of a more personal nature."

Immediately, I thought of the videos that Elena had been threatening me with for the past two years. Shit! How would Hyde have gotten them? I went directly to my file cabinet and pulled out a Non-Disclosure Agreement form.

"Samantha, before we proceed, would you mind signing this NDA? I'm sure you've already signed something similar for Ms. Steele. I need to know that anything you find out about me will remain confidential."

Samantha glanced at the form for a few seconds and signed it without commenting. Then she looked up at me and said, "You have nothing to worry about from me, Mr. Grey. Hyde might be a different matter though."

"OK, what does he have?" I asked, bracing myself for the worst.

"Several years... probably up to twenty-five or so, although the majority of them are within the past ten years... worth of documents and photographs, not just of you, but also of other members of your family. Carrick Grey, Grace Trevelyan-Grey, Elliot Grey, Mia Grey. Even a few featuring your grandparents, Theodore and Ava Trevelyan. There are newspaper articles featuring each of your parents. Also articles from Medical or Legal Journals that your parents have published. Random things like sports news featuring you, your brother, or your sister dating back to when each of you were in high school. A lot of articles about the start of GEH and your rise to success. Also reviews of Elliot Grey's architecture firm, and even some advertisements for it. Some of the articles date back to before your family moved to Seattle. They're from Detroit. Some of the files are confidential, particularly those concerning your adoption, and some sealed court documents pertaining to your early teens. He also has documents related to the adoptions of both your brother in Detroit and your sister here in Seattle."

"Why the hell would he have all of that?" I questioned out loud, even though I knew neither of them would have the answer.

"I have some theories about that, sir, but first... there's more. I also found pictures that either Mr. Hyde or someone he may have hired took of you and Elena Lincoln."

"Oh, shit," I said under my breath. Then I cleared my throat, ran my fingers through my hair, and asked out loud, "What kind of pictures?"

Samantha glanced at me before looking back at her laptop. "Nothing damaging, if that's what you're worried about. Just of the two of you dining in a restaurant, or sitting somewhere talking. But they seem to cover a few years, dating back to before you started GEH, I'm sure. And I found a few emails, and honestly, I think you should be more concerned about them. It looks like Mr. Hyde contacted Elena Lincoln several times beginning soon after the commencement of his employment at Ismintis. He was asking very personal questions about her relationship with you and offering money for information. At first, she didn't respond. However, the most recent emails, which were about six months ago, she actually initiated. She promised him information in exchange for cash. I didn't find any exchange of personal information about you from her, but I'm sure it is just a matter of digging deeper. They most likely used other private email accounts, and probably encrypted them.

"And he did all this from his work email?" Ana asked.

"No, very little was from his work email. He was careful. I hacked two of his personal email accounts, but I'm sure he has others that I just haven't found yet. Also, most of the files I found were on his personal laptop, not his work computer, and some of them were also encrypted, but I was able to break into them.

"What else did you find, Samantha?" I asked her.

"OK, here's where it gets really weird," she answered. "Well... really weirder. It's already really weird. On his personal computer, I found Word documents... not emails, but what appeared to be drafts of what would become emails, of exchanges between you, Mr. Grey, and Ros Bailey, and Barney Sullivan. It looks like he was in the process of framing you. This is a theory... I'm not sure I can prove it... but I believe that he was planning to create bogus emails that would have dated back to the relevant time that these events would have been occurring... to frame you for spying on Ana. The emails... or what would become faked emails... are of you giving instructions to Barney to bug Ana's office. The ones to Ms. Bailey imply that you know about the bug and that you want her to get the information from Mr. Henry so you can sabotage the deals that Ismintis was in the process of making. There is every indication that he was trying to make it look like you had a personal vendetta against Ana."

"Well, no wonder he was acting so strangely on Friday," Ana said. "Our little lunch date ruined his plans. What a shame... asshole."

I pondered everything Samantha had told us so far and then surmised, "So... from everything you've gathered... it sounds more like he has a personal vendetta against me. It sounds like he was using Ana... or Ismintis at least... to get to me."

"That is what I believe, sir," Samantha said.

"Is that all?" I asked. "Or was there more that you found?"

"Well, that's about all pertaining to you, Mr. Grey, except for the emails to your employee, Boyd Henry. He was the only person at GEH that I found any connections to. And it is interesting... and actually a bit bizarre how Mr. Hyde set up the emails from Ismintis. It looks like he was setting it up to implicate another Ismintis employee, but that person could not possibly have sent the emails."

"Why is that?" Ana asked.

"It's Amanda Forester. Timing. When one of the emails was sent to Henry, supposedly from her computer, she was in the hospital having an emergency appendectomy. And another time, she was in Little Rock at her father's funeral. I'm not sure why Hyde chose her, but it's obvious that he's using her as a cover. But it's strange. If he wanted to implicate her, why not just use her email account to send the files to Mr. Henry? Maybe he was afraid she would find the files in her sent box and blow the whistle too soon. But Amanda Forester is not the type of person anyone would suspect of having the skills to create multiple bogus email accounts. She works in public relations. She's an odd choice for what he was doing."

"OK, what else?" Ana asked.

"He's been embezzling from you," Samantha answered bluntly.

"Do you have proof?" Ana asked.

"Yes, enough solid evidence to give you ample grounds to fire him, even without all the other things I've told you."

"Shit!" Ana spat. "How much?" she asked Samantha. "And how?"

"Padirbinys International," Samantha answered.

Ana stared at her blankly, so I asked, "What the hell is that?"

Ana answered, "It's a business that we acquired several months ago. Based in Romania. Telecommunications. It was Jack's idea, and I let him run with it."

"Except that there is no business in Romania, or anywhere else for that matter, with that name. It doesn't exist. He falsified all the documents. I found proof on his personal computer, and I copied it all onto this thumb drive." She handed the USB drive to Ana. "Oh, and I forgot," she picked up another USB drive and handed it to me. "Copies of all the documents that I described earlier. I also took the liberty of deleting them from Hyde's computer. I hope I did the right thing there. But it's possible he had back up files or hard copies somewhere, plus I'm not sure I found everything. It's still possible that..."

Ana interrupted her. "Samantha... can we get back to Padirbinys? What do you mean, it doesn't exist?"

"Just that," she answered. "He falsified everything. The proof is right there. He took the two point eight million dollars that you guys supposedly paid for that company and transferred it to an offshore account. I even found the account number."

"Wow, two point eight million... is that all?" Ana asked sarcastically.

"Well, actually..." Samantha continued, and Ana groaned. Samantha quickly added, "It's all for now, I think. But he was clearly making plans to do it again."

"What do you mean?" Ana asked.

Samantha blushed a little, which was unexpected. She told Ana, "He recently started corresponding with a Mr. Bibio Galva in Ethiopia. He emailed you about his communications with him. Does that ring a bell?"

Ana nodded. "So, you're telling me he was lying about that too?" she asked.

Samantha nodded in response. "Not only that, but do you know what he did? He was a lot more brazen with this one, but both of them are pretty much an 'F you."

"What do you mean?" Ana asked again.

"You don't speak any Lithuanian, do you?" Samantha asked.

"No," Ana answered. "My grandmother was Lithuanian. She inspired the name of my company. Ismintis means wisdom in Lithuanian, and she taught me that concept. But... I'm guessing that 'Bibio Galva' means something in Lithuanian?"

Samantha nodded and blushed again. She glanced at me and then answered Ana, "It means 'dickhead.' So he was supposedly communicating with a 'Mr. Dickhead' in Ethiopia. And the bogus Romanian company... 'Padirbinys' actually means 'counterfeit' in Lithuanian. He was pretty much telling you that the company wasn't real. He knew you probably wouldn't bother to look up the meaning of the word."

"Shit!" Ana exclaimed.

"That rat bastard!" I muttered. I decided it was time to open Hyde's background search to find out what else Welch had found out about him.

Samantha chattered on while I started scanning Hyde's report. "I'm not sure why he chose Romania... maybe he thought the name sounded Eastern European so it would be easy to fool you. But Ethiopia is an even greater mystery. Why choose there? Certainly nothing about Bibio Galva sounds Amharic... or like any of the other cultures in that region. Maybe it could pass for Swahili, but even that's a stretch."

Ana answered, "I think it was probably because he knew I was interested in investing in the economy there. Addis Ababa has one of the most rapidly growing economies in the world, but the rest of the country is still one of the poorest in the world, and education is almost nonexistent for girls in some parts of the country. I've been researching and making plans to fund a few schools there. I knew I'd get further ahead in negotiations with government leaders to open these schools if I was already bringing something to their economies, so I'd instructed Jack to look for companies in Addis for us to invest in."

I looked up from perusing Hyde's background check to ask Ana, "What do you think of the idea of having Samantha here put her head together with Barney to see what else they can uncover. She has access to Ismintis, and Barney has access to GEH. I'd feel better about having him do a search to make sure there haven't been other fishy things going on between Ismintis, through Jack of course, and GEH. Who's to say it's only Henry who has been involved, just because he's the only one we've found so far."

"Sure, that's fine with me," Ana answered. "Especially since it appears that Jack is targeting you for some reason, and he's been in contact with Elena Lincoln. If he does turn out to have something deeply personal against you... and that's certainly how it looks... then imagine what he might do if gets his hands on..." She stopped speaking before she revealed too much information about those damn videos to Samantha. She turned to Samantha and said, "Work with Barney... see what else you can find. You don't have to ask me first before you share confidential company information, but make sure we have an NDA from him too before you get started. And remember to be sensitive about how you share information with me. I'm going to have my office swept today, but I won't rest easy until all of this is over."

"Sure, Ana," Samantha answered. "So you want me to keep working here at GEH?"

Ana looked at me questioningly. "Can she share space with Barney?" she asked.

"Sure," I answered. I spoke to Samantha, "You already have your laptop, and Barney has an extra table where you can work. It will be convenient." I picked up my phone and called Barney.

"What time is it? How much time until Mr. Henry is supposed to get here?" Ana asked as we were waiting for Barney to come up from his office on the eighteenth floor to mine on the twentieth.

"It's 9:40, so we have about twenty minutes," I answered.

A minute later, Barney stuck his head in my door, "I haven't found anything other than Henry leading back to Jack Hyde," was how he greeted me.

"Barney, come in here for a minute," I told him. "This is Samantha Gilbert from Ismintis International. I want you to work with her. She's found all kinds of shit about me on Hyde's computer. She'll brief you, and then I want you to work together to see what else you find. Give her access to GEH, and she'll also get you into Ismintis without you needing to break any laws."

"Not that you'd ever do anything like that," Ana quipped.

Barney and Samantha greeted each other, and then I sent them off to Barney's office so Ana and I could prepare to meet with Boyd Henry.

"I'm not sure this is even necessary any more," Ana said. "After what Samantha has uncovered, Henry isn't very useful to us. I'm sure we know more than he does at this point."

"True," I said. "But I feel the need to chew his ass. Don't you?" I asked.

"Not really," she answered. "I want to kick Hyde's ass. I don't really care one way or the other about Henry. It's good you've already let him go. I think I'll just watch you chew his ass, and then I'll go. I might end up having a question or two, but it might not be necessary."

My phone rang then. It was Andrea telling me Henry was here. I told her to send him in.

When Henry entered, he tripped on the rug and fell. When I looked up, he was on his knees in front of Ana. I raised my eyebrows at her, amused at the sight before me. She raised hers back at me, as if to say "Don't even dare to go there."

She was the first to speak. "Mr. Henry, are you OK?" she asked him kindly.

As he got up and brushed himself off, he groaned and said, "Oh, God. It's you. I recognize your voice."

"Anastasia Steele," she responded as she put out her hand to shake his.

He took her hand and said, "Ms. Steele, I am so sorry for what I did. I knew at the time that it was wrong, but I... It doesn't matter. I have no excuse good enough."

Ana didn't respond to him, but she motioned for him to sit down in the chair next to hers. Both of them were seated across from me, as I sat behind my desk.

"You're right, Mr. Henry," I told him. "No excuse is good enough for what you did. Nevertheless, I still want to hear it. Why the hell would you think it would be acceptable for GEH to spy on our competitor, to actually bug the office of their CEO?"

Henry's red face got a little redder. "I didn't think, sir. It was just... the recordings seemed like a... gift. I needed to make those deals. I needed to move up, to impress you and Ms. Bailey. I let ambition blind me, sir."

I pressed him, "And you seriously thought you could keep the recordings a secret? That we wouldn't find out about it?"

"I honestly didn't think it would matter, sir," he answered. "After the deals were made, I didn't think you'd go back and question them."

I stood up and came around my desk to stand in front of him. "You honestly thought we would approve of your unethical behavior?"

His face remained red, and he trembled a little. He didn't answer my question.

"Mr. Henry, do you have any idea how much your unethical behavior has cost GEH?" I asked him.

"No, sir," he answered quietly, not looking up.

I didn't volunteer the answer to my own question, because the truth was that I didn't know yet. I wouldn't know until Ana decided if she wanted McPherson and Sunset. Then I would need to do the calculations.

"Just out of curiosity..." I asked, "You always seemed like such a boy scout. Ros trusted you. She had a lot of faith in you, actually. And you had to have known you were acting unethically. Why risk so much? I don't buy the ambition shit. I'm ambitious, Mr. Henry. Ms. Steele here is ambitious. But you don't see either of us breaking laws to get where we've gotten, or spying on each other. What you did is disgusting. You should have reported those emails immediately, and you know it. So, why didn't you? What's the real reason?"

The man actually had tears in his eyes now. "Mr. Grey, I told you, sir, I don't have a good excuse. I was stupid. The truth is... I was trying to impress my wife. I wanted to try to save my marriage, and I thought if I moved up in the company, it would work."

"So that's your excuse?" I asked him skeptically. "You were having marriage troubles?"

"Yes, sir. My wife had an affair. I caught them... and the man was actually a big wig at Ismintis International. The COO actually. So I thought I could get back at him... and the way to do it was just handed to me on a silver platter... and I could save my marriage and climb the ladder here at GEH at the same time."

Ana spoke up. "Your wife had an affair with Jack Hyde? And you walked in on them?"

He nodded. "I forgave her, but things haven't been the same between us since."

I walked back around my desk and sat down again. "Mr. Henry, did the thought never occur to you that Hyde might have been setting you up?"

"What do you mean?" he asked.

Ana rolled her eyes and answered him, "What he means is that Hyde set you up. He is the one who bugged my office and sent you the emails. He knew it would get you fired eventually, and it could have even ended up sending you to prison."

Henry had fucking tears in his eyes again. "Why would he do that?" he asked. "I did nothing to him. He's the one who screwed my wife, and I did nothing to retaliate against him. I let it go. I forgave her. She's the one who decided she didn't want anything with him. She chose to stay with me. Why would Hyde set me up and get me fired?"

Ana and I looked at each other, and I could see that we agreed. This meeting was done. We weren't going to get anything else from Henry, and we didn't need to waste our time trying to answer his questions. I only half listened as Ana said some kind of consoling bullshit to him, and then I dismissed him. I instructed him to stop by Ros's office to collect the belongings that he'd left behind on Friday. She had gotten another employee to box them all up, and she also wanted to have another word with him before we sent him on his merry way.

Once Henry was gone, and I was alone with Ana, I asked her, "Be honest, princess. How did it feel to have him kneeling before you?"

"Shut up, Christian," she answered, but I saw the humor in her eyes.

I stood up and walked around to stand in front of her. "Did you just tell me to shut up, Ms. Steele?" I asked her using my Dom voice. "That's so rude."

I watched delightedly as her pupils dialated and her nipples got hard. But then, she got to her feet and said, "I'm sorry, Christian. As much as I would love to stay here and play with you, I can't. I've already been here for over two hours this morning, and things are falling apart at Ismintis. I need to take off. I have a COO to fire, among other things."

I felt disappointed, but even worse, I felt a stab of fear. "Ana, take plenty of security with you. You don't know what this guy is capable of. Better yet, how about I come with you?"

She rolled her eyes, making me want to take her over my knee. "Christian... I know. This won't be the first time I've fired someone... just the first COO. And no, you don't need to come with me. Absolutely not. What kind of message would that send? Besides, it sounds like he may be more danger to you than to me."

"Anastasia, don't be naive. The guy could be just as dangerous to you. Just promise me that you'll keep security with you all day, OK?"

She sighed. "OK, I agree. I'll keep Sawyer with me all day. Happy?"

I sighed too. "Just be careful, OK? And call me with an update as soon as you're able."

"Yes, dad," she answered snarkily.

Once Ana had gone, I got back to Hyde's background report. Five minutes later, I came across a file that had the hair standing on the back of my neck. What the hell was this?


	20. Chapter 20: Manic Monday, Part 2 (CPOV)

Chapter 20: (Christian's POV)

"Hey, asshole! I brought lunch!" Elliot's voice rang out as he entered my office without knocking. I didn't look up from my computer. He sounded just as cheerful as usual, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened the previous day.

I nodded to Elliot and finished writing the email I was working on. Once I'd sent it, I looked up. "Thanks, Elliot. Ooooh, is this from that sandwich shop near your office?"

"Yep," he answered. "Turkey club with that olive spread you like. And house-made chips. We need to talk, Christian."

"Well, I figured, Elliot," I responded, and I sighed. "I'm sure you're pissed to find out that you didn't introduce me to the lifestyle like you thought. I should have told you, but I didn't know how. There were too many things I wanted to keep secret... from everyone."

"Yeah, I know, you're a dipshit, but that's not what we need to talk about," Elliot said. "I get it, Christian. I'm not angry or anything." He took a bite of his sandwich before he elaborated any more.

I considered him for a minute as I took a bite of my sandwich too. Was he still feeling guilty? I told him, "Well, no more apologizing for something you couldn't have known was happening. You were just a teenager, too, Elliot. We were both just kids."

"I know," he answered. "And I still feel responsible... but that's not why I'm here either."

We both ate silently for a minute before I glanced at him and said, "You're not going to bring up that shit again about playing together, are you?"

Elliot looked surprised. "What? No, of course not. That's off the table. Even Kate was against it after we talked about it again. She said it would never work. Something about you both being too dominant, or some shit like that."

"Well, at least one of you has good sense," I joked.

He laughed, but then got serious again. "Christian, I need to tell you about the conversation I had with Mia last night after you left."

"Mia?" I asked. Oh, hell. "Does she know...? She was upstairs the entire time everything went down yesterday, right? Does she know what happened?"

Elliot looked embarrassed. He cleared his throat before he answered, "She knows a hell of a lot more than I'm sure you wanted her to, but not because I volunteered any information. Mom wasn't joking when she said she was going to get drunk. And let me tell you, Christian, drunk Mom is not a pretty sight. Funny as hell, but not pretty. She was singing, she was dancing, and she was talking... a lot. She had no filter. So Mia heard more than she should have, and so then she had questions that I was forced to answer. You know none of us can say no to Mia."

"So she knows about Elena Lincoln?" I asked, bracing myself for his answer.

"Yep. Not just that, bro. She knows about the BDSM too. Yours, I mean. Not mine, thank God."

"Well, shit," I muttered. "Did she... Is she angry with me about it? Does she think I was abusing them?"

Elliot looked surprised again. "Why would she...?" He sighed, shook his head, and then said, "No, Christian, she isn't angry with you. Christ, man, you don't give any of us any credit, do you? You were so sure we were all just going to reject you, you kept this secret for over a decade. You didn't even tell me, even after you found out I was in the lifestyle too. God damn it, you're something else, you know it?"

"I know, Elliot. I know," I said weakly. "So... Mia isn't angry? What did she say?"

"Well, do you remember that idiot boy that she was complaining about yesterday? The one we chased away before he could fuck her at her senior prom? Leif something or other?"

"The dope head?" I asked.

"It was just a little pot," Elliot said, imitating Mia, but then he got serious again. "Yeah, him. Apparently, Elena Lincoln had something going on with him too."

"Really? Mia told you that?" I asked.

"Yep. Apparently, they were pretty good friends in high school. He told her but swore her to secrecy. So, she didn't tell me, and I'm not telling you now. But Christian, if this kid could be convinced to press charges..."

"He's twenty-one?" I asked.

Elliot thought about it. "Yeah, I think so. He's her age, and she's twenty-one, so I guess so. Why?"

"Because it might be too late for him too, depending on how close he is to twenty-two," I explained. I had researched this law, so I knew it like the back of my hand. "If he didn't press charges against her within a year when it happened, then he only has three years from his eighteenth birthday. That's for a civil suit. It's different with criminal charges. Too late for that without a doubt... unless he pressed charges within a year, but I doubt he did. We would have heard about it."

"Well, shit," Elliot said. "I wanted the bitch to go to prison."

"I'm working on that," I told him. "Remember what we discussed yesterday? Ana's idea? It's put into action. If the 'pedo-bitch,' as Ana calls her, is still taking kids into her sex dungeon, we'll find out. Taylor and Welch are on it. I also got Welch to put someone on her, a covert operative, so if she's meeting an underage sub somewhere else, we'll find out about that too. I also have them looking into the club that she owns... looking for anything that we could use against her."

"Wait, Elena Lincoln owns a club?" Elliot asked. "A BDSM club?"

"Mmm hmm," I answered. "Chains. You know it?"

"I've heard of it," he answered, "but never been there, thank God. Have you been there?"

"No, I don't go to BDSM clubs. Never been to one. Hell, I'd never been to a play party until you took me to one. It was perfect timing, too, because it was just a couple of months after the shit hit the fan with Elena fucking Lincoln. I didn't know how I was going to contract any new submissives without her. You helped me out by introducing me to play parties. I was telling you the truth, Elliot. I just lied to you by omission." Not that that made it fucking OK. I still felt like shit.

"So I guess when you were subbing for her, the 'pedo-bitch' didn't take you out in public much," he said, more as a statement than a question.

"Not at all," I responded. "She was careful. I was her dirty little secret. But she kept a lot of secrets from me too, obviously. I didn't know about her owning a club until everything came out two years ago. But even then, I didn't think she was into minors." I paused, and then added sarcastically, "I thought I was 'special.'"

"Well, we've always known you were 'special," Elliot said sarcastically.

I smirked at him. "Anyway... I hope my guys uncover something, and soon. If we can find minors that she's been involved with recently enough, then we can set it up and send her ass to prison."

"She's a child predator," Elliot said. "As much as I don't wish that shit on anyone, I'm sure that we'll find others. We'll get her, bro."

I smirked at him. That's my sunshiny brother, ever the optimist. "I hope you're right, Elliot. Thanks for being with me on this."

"Well, of course I'm with you on it, you idiot," he responded. "Oh, and Kate is ready to write an expose on the pedo-bitch as soon as the timing is right."

"Tell her to hold off on that, at least for now," I said.

My dad, who I had been expecting since I'd called him earlier, picked just that moment to walk through my door. "Andrea said to come on in," he called out. "You OK, Christian? Oh, hi, Elliot, I didn't expect to see you too, son."

We were almost finished eating. Elliot responded to Dad, "Hey, Dad... If I'd known you were coming I would have grabbed you a sandwich too."

"It's OK, son, I don't have much time. Christian asked me to stop by. What's up, son?"

I opened up the document from Hyde's report that had nearly made me lose my shit earlier, and I printed out a color copy for Dad. "Can you take a look at this photo and tell me what you see?" I requested.

Dad examined the photo. It was of a man and woman who looked to be in their late twenties or early thirties. From the way they were dressed, they were obviously working class people. Standing around them were five kids of various ages, ranging from probably around ten down to four. Well, I knew for a fact that he was four years old, but he actually looked more like two or three.

"Where did you get this, son?" Dad asked curiously.

"I'll get to that," I told him. "But who are the people, and where is it from?" I asked.

"Well, this little boy is obviously you," he answered, pointing to the youngest child in the photo. "I think you know that already. It was taken in Detroit, just before we adopted you. The man and woman were foster parents that you lived with for a few weeks before we were permitted to bring you home. The Harrisons? No, Harringtons. That's it. Your mom probably remembers more about them than I do."

"I don't remember them at all," I told him. It felt strange, not being able to remember something that significant from my past.

"Well, you had just suffered a major traumatic event, and you were only four years old," Dad explained.

"Dad, do you recognize any of the other kids in the photo?" I asked him.

He looked at the photo again. "No," he answered. "I seem to recall that they had two or three kids of their own, and the others would have been other foster kids who were living with them at the time. Why, Christian?"

I pointed to one of the other kids in the picture, an angry looking boy who looked to be around seven or eight years old. "That's Jack Hyde. Ana's COO. I came across this photo in his background report."

"Well, that's unexpected," Dad said.

"Jack Hyde is from Detroit too?" Elliot asked. "From the foster care system in Detroit? Christ, it's a small world, isn't it? What are the chances..."

I silenced Elliot when I told them, "Jack Hyde has been giving one of my employees... well, a former employee now, confidential information that he obtained by bugging Ana's office. He's been spying on her and giving me secrets. Meanwhile, he was working on creating bogus emails to make it look like I was instructing my employees to do it. He was trying to set me up to make it look like I was spying on the CEO of Ismintis International."

"But... why?" Elliot asked.

I continued, "Not only that, but Ana's IT girl also uncovered dozens of documents on Hyde's personal computer. Personal shit from our whole family that date all the way back to our adoptions. He has articles you've published in legal journals, Dad, and that Mom published in medical journals. He has stuff on your firm, Elliot. Sports articles from our high school years. He has stuff on Mia too. All of us. Even Grandma and Grandpa."

"Why would he have all that, Christian?" Dad asked. "It sounds like he has an obsession with you."

"That's exactly what I think, Dad," I answered.

"Creepy," Elliot muttered, and I nodded my agreement.

"So, what are you planning to do about it?" Dad asked.

"I'm not sure yet," I answered. "Ana's supposed to be firing his ass. Probably already has. She left here over two hours ago, and I haven't heard from her yet. Turns out he was embezzling from her too, so she has grounds to fire him over that. I'm not sure whether she was planning to confront him about his plot to set me up."

"Wow," Elliot said. "Holy shit!"

Dad glanced at his watch and then told us, "I need to get back to my office, but before I go... I just wanted to ask you, Christian... I know you may not like my asking, but I'd like to know. Where do things stand today with Elena Lincoln?"

I looked Dad in the eye when I answered, "You can ask anything, Dad. I'm not keeping any more secrets about Elena Lincoln." I picked up a copy of the contract that I had printed out for him already. "I had one of my lawyers polish the language in this contract this morning, and I've sent her a copy by special courier. It's my offer to hand over Esclava to her in exchange for the videos... all copies of the videos with her assurance that there aren't any more. And her agreement to stay out of our lives for good. I thought you'd like to take a look at it, so I printed you a copy. I regret keeping it all from you, Dad. From here forward, I intend to keep you informed."

Dad looked out the window, and I could have sworn he had tears in his eyes, but he cleared his throat and said, "I'm happy to hear that, son."

Elliot told Dad, "He's got a tail on her too. If she's screwing any other kids, we'll find out."

I said, "Elliot, I'm not sure you should be as certain as you are about that. She's going to be more careful than usual because of what happened yesterday. And she's smarter than you might think. Don't underestimate her."

"I'm not going to underestimate you either, Christian," he responded.

"Well, on that note," Dad said, "stay out of trouble, sons. I need to get back to work."

After Dad and Elliot had both left, I tried giving Anastasia a call. It had been over three hours since she'd left my office, and I still hadn't heard anything from her. When her cell phone went to voice mail, I called her office number. Her assistant, Hannah Bradley answered the phone and let me know that Ana was in a meeting. I asked her to ask Ana to call me when she became available.

I wondered whether Anastasia was still meeting with Jack Hyde or whether she had already let him go and was now meeting with someone else. Surely, if she were in any danger, Hannah would have let me know. Then again, no one except family knew yet that were were together, so it would have been imprudent for Hannah to alert me if Ana were in danger. She would have needed to carry on as if it were business as usual, especially with someone like me.

I called Taylor into my office. "Anastasia isn't answering my calls, and I just want to make sure she's safe. She was going to fire Jack Hyde after she left here, and I don't know what he's capable of. I'm tempted to go over to Ismintis myself to check on her, but I don't think that would go over very well with her. Maybe you could check in with Luke Sawyer and make sure everything went smoothly with Hyde."

"Sir," Taylor responded, "Jack Hyde didn't show up for work today. We have someone watching him, and apparently he hasn't left his apartment all day."

"Is that right?" I asked. "Why the hell has Ana not called me yet if she didn't even have to deal with Hyde?" I pondered out loud, not really expecting Taylor to respond.

"Sir, I'm sure she actually is dealing with Hyde and other company business and has simply been too busy to call you. After all, she is a CEO without a COO now."

"Check in with Sawyer," I ordered him. "Let me know when you find out anything."

"Sir," he responded, and he left my office.

For the next two hours, I was on a conference call with my Paris office. I'd thought that I only had a couple of fires to put out, but it turned out to be a major clusterfuck. Things were so bad that there was a strong possibility that I would need to make a trip there in the next few days to straighten things out in person.

During my conference call, I had received a text from Taylor stating that Ms. Steele was still in her office. According to Sawyer, she had been in meetings with numerous employees, and when she wasn't in meetings, she had been on the phone. Due to her own security concerns, she had asked Sawyer to remain in her office with her, which set my mind at ease a little, that she was taking her own safety seriously. But she still hadn't called me, and I was getting more than a little pissed off about that.

Shortly after my conference call ended, Welch strode into my office. "We've got her, Mr. Grey. The bitch is going down!"

"Welch, what have you got?" I asked him.

"Isaac Horowitz," he answered smoothly.

"Elena Lincoln's latest submissive?" I asked.

"Yep. Guess how old he is?" he prompted me.

"Umm... She implied to me several months ago that he was in his twenties," I answered. "But I'm guessing he's younger than that?"

"Try seventeen," he said. "And she's been fucking him for nearly two years, so they had to have started when he was fifteen or so."

"Sounds like I need to have a conversation with Mr. Horowitz," I said. "I'm sure he'll need some convincing if he's still with her."

"Maybe so," Welch agreed. "But I've got more, in case the kid doesn't agree to press charges. Apparently, you weren't the only one she pimped... err... made arrangements with... for submissive women. But your specifications were for adult women. Some of the girls she's matched with Dominant men are still minors."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me!" I exclaimed.

"Nope," Welch responded nonchalantly. "I suggest setting her up. Hire a girl who looks like a minor to meet with her, try to get her to admit shit on tape. Then convince a few girls to press charges. Or better yet, get some of their parents involved."

"Welch, where the hell is she getting these minors? I understood that the women she matched with me were submissives that she met through her club and through contacts from her club, but they wouldn't let children in there, would they? And... do these children... are they going... willingly? I mean, my dad would say no, they're below the age of consent, so they can't legally be willing, that even if they agree to it, it's still rape. I'm just wondering..." I trailed off, unsure whether I wanted to voice the rest of what I was thinking.

"You think we need to alert the Feds?" he asked, reading my thoughts better than I could express them. I knew the risk to myself in involving the FBI. However, these were children who were at greater risk. What was more important, their lives or my career? For Christ's sake, I was already a billionaire. I would survive whatever shit storm lay ahead.

"Yes. Set it up," I told him. "Keep my dad in the loop on everything. And make arrangements for me to have a conversation with Isaac Horowitz without Mrs. Lincoln's knowledge."

"Will do, boss," Welch responded, and then he left.

I spent about an hour reading and responding to emails, and still I hadn't heard from Ana. At 4:00, I tried calling her cell again, and once again, it went to voice mail. I texted her instead of leaving a message.

"Anastasia, you are trying my patience. Why the fuck haven't I heard from you yet? Call me."

After that, I checked in with Barney and Samantha. "What have you got for me," I asked as I walked into Barney's office.

Samantha was the first to answer. "One of Elena Lincoln's former submissives works for you. Aiden McKendrick. He's an intern in the mail room."

Holy hell, was there anything this girl didn't know? Had she figured out already that I was one of Elena Lincoln's former subs too? I was sure she had. She was supposed to be looking for information on Hyde. Why was she also looking for Elena Lincoln's subs?

Samantha watched my face with interest. "Mr. Grey, as I told you this morning, I am not a threat to you. Elena Lincoln clearly is, however. And as I also already explained you this morning, the trail from Mr. Hyde led to Mrs. Lincoln."

"Not to mention that I was already looking into Mrs. Lincoln as you instructed," Barney reminded me. "Sammy may have overheard a few things about that."

"Sammy?" I asked, smirking at him.

He smirked back, without commenting. Instead, he said, "Aiden McKendrick has worked for you for about four months. He's a recent college grad. Went to Washington State, majored in Economics. Seems like a bright kid. Probably too bright to be working in the mail room."

"Is he at work today?" I asked.

"Yes, sir, he sure is," Barney answered.

"Tell him about the charges," Samantha told Barney.

"What charges?" I asked.

Barney answered, "McKendrick's parents brought charges against Lincoln when he was fourteen years old. That was eight years ago."

I felt shocked that I hadn't known about it at the time. She had been my so-called friend at the time, at least that is what I had believed. I was certain that my parents also were totally unaware. "So what happened," I asked. "Why didn't anyone know about it at the time, and why didn't she go to prison?"

"Not sure," Barney answered, "but my guess is that they settled out. Lincoln probably pleaded guilty to lesser charges of some sort and got sentenced to community service or some shit. She probably paid the kid off to keep it quiet."

I determined to have a conversation with Aiden McKendrick as soon as I got back to my office. "What else do you have for me?" I asked Barney.

Again, Samantha was the first to speak, "Jack Hyde targeted Marisa Henry. That's Boyd Henry's wife. Looks like he stalked her. He has dozens of photos of her, some taken with a telescopic lens."

"Yeah, Henry said Hyde was having an affair with her," I said.

"All I'm suggesting is... hooking up with her was no accident," Samantha said. "He stalked her, and then I'm sure he wooed her before he screwed her."

"You have such a way with words," Barney told her sarcastically. They smirked at each other.

"OK, so Hyde targeted both of the Henrys. Not sure it matters now, but see what else you can find. Anything else?" I asked.

"Still working on it, sir," Barney answered. "So far, the trail between Lincoln and Hyde ends with the few emails Sammy told you about already... from six months ago. We both suspect that they've been in touch. I think you need to prepare yourself for the possibility that Hyde got his hands on whatever it is Lincoln has on you and is planning to use it against you. We're working on hacking into their phone records. If they've texted, we'll find it. We'll also check their call logs."

"That could be useful in more ways that one," I responded. I knew what Barney and Samantha were doing was illegal, and I didn't usually condone that kind of behavior, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Another thought occurred to me. "Samantha, has Ms. Steele given you any instructions concerning that bank account you discovered? You know, the one that Hyde set up with the money he stole from her?"

"No, not yet," she answered.

"Can you freeze his access to it?" I asked her. "Do you have the skills to do that?"

Samantha and Barney both sniggered. I wondered what they found funny. "Yeah," she answered. "I think I can manage that. I just need the go-ahead from Ana, since she's the one who pays my salary."

"Ummm..." Barney started to say something, but then he stopped. He didn't look up from his computer, and he was frowning.

"Well, spit it out," Samantha ordered him.

"How much did you say was in that account?" he asked her.

"Two point eight million," she answered.

"Well, make that two point two million now," Barney said.

I thought about that for a moment. "So, you're saying that Hyde spent six hundred thousand dollars in the past few hours?"

"Yeah, since 10:00 or so this morning," Samantha answered. "It still had two point eight when I showed it to Barney this morning."

"Barney, can you freeze it?" I asked him.

"Well, yeah," he answered, "but are you sure...?"

"Yes, freeze it," I ordered him.

"But that will alert him..." Barney argued.

"I don't care. Do it," I ordered.

We were all silent for a few seconds as Barney tapped away at his keyboard. Then he looked up at me and said, "Done."

"Good," I responded. Then I asked him, "Have you accessed any of Elena Lincoln's bank accounts?"

"Not today," Barney answered. "But I did that for you a couple of years ago. She may have created new accounts since then. You want me to look for it? For the six hundred thousand big ones?"

"Exactly," I told him. "I want to see if Hyde was paying her for those damn videos."

Neither Barney nor Samantha responded to that. I'm sure they were filing it away though. Finally, Barney spoke. "Umm, sir, you want us to look for the, umm, videos? If they've shared them electronically, I'm sure they left a trail somewhere."

I look a deep breath, and looked out Barney's window instead of looking at either of them, as I answered. "Yes. Look for them. But if you find them, don't... I don't want anyone to see that shit. It looks like something it's not. If you find them, delete them. Destroy them. Don't watch them." I glanced back at them and noticed that Samantha was looking at me sympathetically.

"OK, is that all?" I asked them.

They both nodded, and Barney didn't look up from his screen. As I left the office, Samantha followed me out.

She cleared her throat before she said, so quietly that only I could have heard her, even if anyone else had been standing nearby, "Mr. Grey, I wish you'd stop worrying about me, sir. I'm not in the lifestyle, but I understand it. Barney and I will do our best to protect you."

Oh holy hell! Was this girl a witch, or what? I just stared at her, dumbfounded. What did she know about me, and what had she told Barney?

"Don't worry, Barney doesn't have a clue," she said. "And I won't tell him unless we find your videos. We'll have to watch at least a few seconds to know if it's what you're looking for or not. In that case, if he sees it, I'll explain it to him, so he doesn't misinterpret what he's seeing."

"How do you...?" I started to ask.

"My sister is a submissive," she answered. When she saw the look on my face, she added, "Don't worry, sir, you don't know her. She lives in Chicago and had never been to Seattle until she visited me here last year."

I continued to just stare at her, and she continued to study my face, like I was a fucking science experiment.

Samantha was the first to speak. "Like I said, Mr. Grey, you don't have anything to worry about with me. Your secrets that I know about are safe with me, and the ones I don't know about, I'll do my best to keep hidden."

"Why?" I asked her. I realized that she could have been asking me to pay her off, but she wasn't.

"Well..." she considered it for a moment. "I like you. And I like Ana more. She's been the best boss I've ever had, and I want to keep working for her for years to come. She has killer instinct, and she's in love with you, so you must be a pretty good person. Yeah, I guess that about sums it up."

I shook my head, still surprised by her candidness. I started to tell her that if she ever got tired of working for Ana, that there would be a place for her at GEH, but then I wasn't sure I wanted to have a witch working for me. "Thank you, Ms. Gilbert," I told her, and then I started to walk away.

"It's Samantha," she reminded me, as she turned and walked back into Barney's office.

Holy shit, that was intense, I thought to myself as I walked back to my office. When I got to Andrea's desk, I directed her, "Could you pull the file on Aiden McKendrick. He's an intern in the mail room. Bring it to me immediately. But first, call down and tell him to come by my office as he's leaving today. Then, let me know when he gets here."

"Yes, sir," she answered. She looked up and me and added, "Your sister is in your office, Mr. Grey."

My sister. Oh, shit! I knew why Mia was here, and I didn't want to have to deal with it. When I walked into my office, Mia was standing at the window, staring out of it. She turned toward me, and I could see that she'd been crying. Here was yet another person I loved that I'd made cry in the past few hours.

"Christian," she said. Neither of us spoke another word as she walked towards me. I opened my arms, and she lay her head on my shoulder. Only Mia could ever be this close to me, until Ana. I wrapped my arms around her and just held her there a minute.

When Mia finally looked up at me, I said, "I'm sorry, Mia."

She looked confused. "For what, Christian? You're sorry for being molested and then blackmailed by one of our mother's best friends? You have nothing to apologize for."

Now I was the one who was confused. "But Elliot said you knew... about the rest of it too."

She raised her eyebrows. "Oh, you mean the BDSM? Yeah, Mom was a little bit crazy last night. I heard about that too."

"And you don't hate me now?" I asked.

She looked surprised. "Why would I hate you for having an alternative sex life, Christian? I get why you didn't tell me about it. Why would you tell your baby sister anything about your sex life? That's just... weird. And before you ask, yeah, I know what BDSM is. I'm not interested in it. But I don't think there's anything wrong with it, and if that's what you want to do, who am I to judge? As long as it's all consensual, and I have no doubt about that where you're concerned."

I had never felt so relieved in my life. "God, you have no idea how afraid I've been about you all finding out, and now that you have, it's like this huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I was afraid of losing you all."

"You were afraid of losing us, so you shut us out?" she asked sarcastically.

I sighed and then admitted, "Yeah, I'm fucked up."

She smiled and responded, "Yeah, well, we're all fucked up one way or another. And here I was thinking I have problems, but they pale in comparison to yours."

I was glad that the attention was shifting from me to her, and I wanted to know more. "What are your problems, Mia? Tell me about that fucker in Paris."

"He isn't a fucker, Christian," she responded too defensively. She sighed and then continued. "We fell in love. Seriously in love. Head over heals in love. But he wanted me to uproot my whole life and give up everything for him. I just couldn't do it."

"You're in love with him?" I asked dumbly. My baby sister was in love?

"Yeah," she answered shyly, so unlike herself. "Not that it really matters now. I broke up with him. I think I broke his heart. And my own at the same time."

"So you don't think there's any chance of you..." I started to suggest her reconciling with him, but she interrupted me.

"No, Christian. I can't give up my family and live in Paris long term. I just can't do it. I love him, but I love you too. I don't want to have to choose. But I did choose. God, I'm so fucked up!" She sighed, and then added. "That's not even why I'm here. I didn't intend on telling you about him at all."

"Well, I'm glad you did," I told her. "But if that's not why you're here, then why are you here? Not that you need a reason..."

"Leif Matthews," she answered. "I know Elliot told you what I told him last night. I was just so shocked... about you and Elena Lincoln. Holy shit, to think I used to call her Aunt Elena. I liked her until Leif told me what she did to him. I couldn't believe it at first, but he showed me the bruises. I secretly hated her after that, but I didn't know... Of course I had no idea that the same thing had happened with you years earlier."

I agreed, "Yeah, Mia, you were too little to have any idea about it. I was just fifteen, so you would have been only around eight years old."

"I wonder how many other boys she's done that to, Christian," Mia commented, more as a statement than a question.

"More than I would have ever guessed," I responded. "I'm finding out, now that I'm looking into it. I can't press charges for what she did to me because too much time has passed, but there are others like your friend Leif who can."

"That's just it, Christian," Mia said. "He doesn't know... and he can't know... that I told Elliot or that Elliot told you. He swore me to secrecy. We're still friends, Christian, and he has trust issues. If he knew I betrayed him, it would hurt him, and I can't do that to him. I never should have mentioned it to Elliot, but I was so shocked, it just came out. Please, Christian, don't confront Leif. Besides, he's scared to death of you anyway. He has been ever since you threatened him on my prom night. I thought we'd still date after that, but he was too intimidated by you to even consider it. So we've always been just friends, but really good friends. But if 'the Christian Grey' were simply to speak to him about just about anything, you'd scare the shit out of him. And if he knew you knew about Elena Lincoln... and that you wanted him to press charges against her, it would be too much. Christian, please don't destroy my friendship with him."

"OK, Mia," I told her.

"OK?" she asked.

"Yes, OK," I assured her. "I won't confront him. As far as I'm concerned, I've never heard the name Leif Matthews. If his name comes up, I'll remember he's the kid who took you to your senior prom, and he's your friend. That's all. End of story."

Mia had tears in her eyes again. "Thank you, Christian," she said. "But... are you sure about this? I want her to pay for what she did to you and to him too. I just don't want to ruin my friendship with him over it."

I looked her in the eye and told her confidently, "Mia, the bitch is going down, with or without your friend's testimony. And since you're still friends with him, that's something you should be prepared for. When shit hits the fan, and it will soon, he's probably going to need moral support, even if he isn't involved in it."

"Christian, what shit is going to hit the fan?" Mia asked.

I answered, "Let's just say that your friend isn't the only one of Elena Lincoln's victims that I've learned about in the past few hours. One of them even works for me and is on his way to talk with me, even though he doesn't know why yet. He's looking like our best bet at the moment because his parents actually filed charges against her at the time. And that's not all. There's more I don't want to get into right now, but it means getting the FBI involved."

"Wow," Mia said.

At that moment, Andrea called me letting me know that Aiden McKendrick was here to see me. Shit! I hadn't had a chance to look at his file yet. "Andrea, can you bring me his file first, and ask him to wait a few minutes."

"I'll go, Christian," Mia said as she stood up. She hugged me again and left with Andrea after Andrea placed McKendrick's file on my desk. I looked through the file for a couple of minutes. Barney was right. This kid was impressive. I knew after seeing his resume what my strategy needed to be. I got up and headed out to Andrea's office.

"Mr. McKendrick," I said as I extended my hand to him.

"Mr. Grey," he responded, standing to his feet and taking my hand. His eyes betrayed how shocked he was that I had come out and greeted him like this. He tried to cover his shock by saying, "I'm happy to meet you, sir."

"Come into my office with me," I told him. "There are some things I'd like to discuss with you."

He looked afraid then, but he responded, "Of course, sir," and he followed me back into my office. I motioned for him to sit down before I went back around my desk and took my seat.

I didn't waste any time getting down to business. "Mr. McKendrick, I'm not sure whether you're aware of this or not, but I've recently lost a member of my executive team. We had to let him go on Friday. While we're searching for a replacement for him, I want to increase the support staff, so that my former executive's personal assistant doesn't get overloaded helping Ms. Bailey and myself sort through the mess that was left behind. I've been searching internally for an employee who might be well suited to this assignment, and your name came up as one who is currently in a position well below his potential. I have taken a look at your file... which contains your resume, your college transcripts, and any reports from your direct supervisor from the past four months. And I have to say, I'm impressed. I think you are our guy. It does seem to be rather a waste of potential to have someone who graduated summa cum laude in Economics sorting mail on a daily basis. It must be pretty boring for you."

He stared back at me in shock. "Boring? Umm... I like working here, Mr. Grey. But yeah, I mean, I wouldn't mind being reassigned to a job where I can use my skills more. I'd like that, sir. But I'm still confused as to why you'd choose me out of all of the thousands of employees who work in this building."

I responded, "Well, like I said, we need someone now, and you have been working in a job you aren't best suited for. So, can I take it that you'll accept the offer?"

He considered it for a moment, and then answered, "Yes, sir. Of course. So... is this effective immediately? I mean, should I report to work here tomorrow? I mean here on the twentieth floor, not here in your office... obviously." The kid was so nervous, he was amusing me.

"Yeah, report to Andrea and she'll set you up in a new space. You'll report to Ros Bailey for now, until we replace the other executive. After that, we'll see."

"OK, thank you, sir," he said.

"Oh, and I forgot to mention, this is still an entry level position, but there will be an increase in salary. A fairly significant increase compared to what you were making in the mail room. We can go over all the specifics tomorrow. Or you and Ros can if I'm too busy."

"Thank you again, sir," he said, still looking shell-shocked.

I cleared my throat, not sure how to transition into the real reason I had him here... the real reason I was even giving him the promotion. But I didn't want him to know that. "Mr. McKendrick, there is another issue I'd like to discuss with you, one of a more personal nature. Before I do, I want you to understand that the job promotion you've just accepted is yours, no matter how you respond to what I'm about to discuss with you."

As I watched him, his face turned beet red, and he looked anywhere but at me. "Mr. Grey, I'm sorry, sir, but... not that I think there's anything wrong with your lifestyle, sir, and I respect you tremendously. But sir... I'm not even sure how to say this. It's just that... I'm not gay."

I stared at him in shock. Not gay? Oh, shit! Of course that's what it sounded like to the kid. He thought I was coming on to him, trying to proposition him.

I couldn't control the snigger that slipped out, but then I quickly composed myself and said, "Well, that's a relief I guess, not that I really care one way or another about your sexuality, Mr. McKendrick. I have a girlfriend myself. That's not what I want to discuss with you."

His eyes nearly bugged out of his head, and his face grew even redder. "I'm sorry, sir! It's just that... all the rumors about you are wrong? I thought... You have a girlfriend?"

I sniggered again. "Yes, I do indeed have a girlfriend. I'm sure we'll make our relationship public sometime this week. And Mr. McKendrick, you're too intelligent to believe the shit you read in the tabloids about me. I am not, nor have I ever been, gay."

"I'm so sorry," he muttered. He looked like he wished he could crawl in a hole.

"Relax," I told him. "I'm not offended. I realize how I sounded when I changed the subject, but there's not an easy way to bring this up. You've signed a Non-Disclosure Agreement, so you cannot legally talk about anything I share with you. Do you understand?

"I wouldn't anyway, sir," he assured me, still looking extremely embarrassed.

"OK, then," I said. "Well, here it is then. I learned today that you and I have something in common, an experience from our past that I'm sure we both would rather forget. A person from our past that we'd both rather forget. A person we both knew when we were in our mid-teens."

His faced turned from red to green. As he stared at me, I saw his eyes fill with tears, but then he blinked and looked away. He shook his head slowly before he took a deep breath and looked back at me. "Elena Lincoln," he stated, and I was taken aback at the venom in his voice.

"Well, I can see that we both have the same opinion of her," I said dryly.

"That bitch can eat shit and die," he muttered. Then he looked shocked again and looked at me quickly. "I'm sorry, Mr. Grey. That was very unprofessional of me."

"Fuck professional," I responded. "I agree with you. That bitch can eat shit and die. And I'm doing my best to make sure she does. Or at least that she goes to prison for a long time. That's why I'm talking to you."

"My parents dropped the charges against her," he said simply.

"Well, at least they filed charges," I told him. "They knew about it when it happened to you, and they were able to stop it. My parents didn't know about what she did to me until this past weekend. For me, it was thirteen years ago, and it still devastated them."

He stared at me dumbly for a moment before he said, "I'm sorry, Mr. Grey, I'm just trying to wrap my mind around this. You were Elena Lincoln's submissive? I mean, she took you to her sex dungeon and... did all those things to you? And you let her?"

I nodded. "Yes. For more than four years. And my family didn't have a clue even though she was a family friend. She was still friends with my parents until this weekend. Now, they know, so she's persona non grata."

"Well, I'm sure that's the understatement of the year," he said wistfully.

I continued to explain, "Yeah, so anyway, the thing is, I was really fucked up before she ever did anything with me, and so I thought at the time that she was helping me. And I thought I was special. I mean, I thought I was the only one she did that with. The only kid I mean. I remained friends with her after we ended our agreement. That all ended two years ago for reasons I'd rather not get into, but I still thought, even then, that I was the only kid she had done that to. But I learned just this weekend that I was wrong. I learned about you just today. There are others. I'm not sure yet how many, and I don't know how many are still young enough to press charges against her. You're unique because your parents actually filed charges at the time. And you're still young enough... you can still bring criminal charges against her."

"But, Mr. Grey, I told you... My parents dropped the charges," he said. He was turning green again.

"Why was that?" I asked.

"Several reasons," he answered. "First, I think, they thought it was best for my well-being. They didn't want to put me through the ordeal of a court trial. It was really traumatic for me. All of it. I was in therapy for several years after that... the rest of my high school years and into college. I think they knew it would be too much for me to handle. Second, they couldn't really afford the legal costs. And third, they never admitted this to me, but I suspect that she paid them off. And we really needed the money back then. My dad had been laid off from his job, and my mom was just a server in a restaurant. I don't blame them, if that's what happened. They did their best."

"I'm sure they did," I agreed. "And I'm impressed that they realized it was going on. If she groomed you like she groomed me, you were doing your best to keep it from them. My parents never had a clue, even though she was in and out of our house all the time."

He looked disgusted. "Yeah, she groomed me all right. But my mom saw me without my shirt on. She saw the bruises. I didn't realize it, but she had also noticed me wincing, and she'd been watching me. She suspected something. She thought I was getting into fights at school. She drug the truth out of me. I defended Mrs. Lincoln. I told Mom that I wanted it. Of course, Mom would hear nothing of it. She confronted Mrs. Lincoln immediately. And that was when Mrs. Lincoln showed her true colors. She turned on me. Made it all look like my fault. I felt betrayed. I've hated her ever since."

I cleared my throat before I got down to business. "So, are you willing to reopen the charges against her?" I asked him bluntly.

He looked uncertain. "What would that entail?"

"Probably the most difficult part will be telling a court what she did to you. Reliving it. I'm not going to pretend it will be easy for you. But your testimony could be the most powerful tool we have at the moment. Let me ask you this: do you want her to go to prison?"

"Yes," he answered without hesitating. "But... if the charges were dropped, isn't it too late to do anything? And how much would I need to pay in legal fees?"

"I don't think it's too late, but our legal team will advise us on that. And you don't have to pay anything. Not a cent. If it weren't unethical, not to mention illegal, I would pay you. And while we're on that subject, let me repeat that your promotion had absolutely nothing to do with this. If you choose not to cooperate, the promotion is still yours. Totally unrelated. Your own merit is what got you promoted."

"I understand, sir, if that question ever comes up," he responded.

"Good. I will pay all the legal fees. I expect there to be other guys like us that she had as her underaged submissives... I already know of at least two others, and one of them is still a minor. So it won't be just you against her. And even if I didn't pay the fees, my dad would do it pro bono. He's just as determined as I am to send her ass to prison."

He took a deep breath, looked me in the eye, and said. "I'll do it. And please, call me Aiden. I need to go, sir, but I will be here for work tomorrow, so if it's OK, we can discuss this again, and you can tell me what I need to do. But for now... I need to process all of this. But yes, I'll do it."

"Great!" I said. "Thank you, Aiden. I'll see you tomorrow."

When Aiden had left, I closed my eyes and rubbed them, needing to clear my mind for a moment. I knew that he had a difficult road ahead, reliving everything. I didn't envy him. Even still, I regretted passing the statute of limitations deadline so that I couldn't press charges against her myself. Who was I kidding, I probably wouldn't have even if I could have, because of the potential damage to my reputation. At least I didn't have to make a decision one way or another like these young men like Aiden who I needed to convince.

Six o-clock. Time to call it a day. And I still had not heard anything from Ana. Eight hours had passed since I told her to call me when she had time. Had she not had a minute free in the past eight hours to call me? What the hell was going on with her? I picked up my phone and called her cell phone, again. Voice mail, again. I called her office number, again. This time, nobody answered. Instead, I got the standard after work hours message with the request to call again during work hours. Shit!

Finally, I decided to call Luke Sawyer directly. "Sawyer," he answered.

"Sawyer, this is Christian Grey. Are you with Ana?" I asked him.

"Yes, sir," he answered. "I've had my eyes on her all day. She's safe, sir."

"Could you pass your phone to her so I can have a word with her?" I asked him as politely as I could even though I was about to explode in anger.

"Sir, she's on her phone at the moment," he explained.

"Just pass her the fucking phone," I snapped. "I'll wait until she's done with the other call."

For a few seconds, all I heard was silence. And then... my angel's voice. "Hannah, I don't care if he thinks I'm a bitch. I told you I can't meet with him tomorrow. Deal with it. Fit him in on Thursday or Friday. And make sure that Peter, Ellen, and Marcia know about the lunch meeting tomorrow at noon. And fit Colby in between three and four." She paused for a moment, and I heard her ask, "Luke, why did you hand me your phone?" There was silence again for a few seconds, and then she said, "OK, is that all, Hannah? OK, bye." And then she was talking to me. "Christian?"

"Hello, princess," I responded, trying to curb my anger.

"Oh, God. I'm sorry, Christian. This day has just been crazy. A nightmare. Back-to-back meetings all day long. Well, you can imagine, I'm sure. But I'm sorry, baby. I know I promised to call you, and I... I'm sorry."

"Have you eaten today?" I asked her.

"Eaten?" she asked dumbly. She seemed unsure. "Luke, did I have lunch?" she asked him. She was silent for a moment, as she was clearly listening to his response. "Christian, I had a sandwich for lunch. It was a lunch meeting with Marcia Walker, who was Hyde's P.A. We both ate sandwiches that Ryan picked up from the deli on the corner. Luke didn't leave my office all day. Well, until I did. We've both left the office now." She sounded nervous. Oh, she should be nervous, even if she couldn't see my twitching palm.

"So, do you mean to tell me that you didn't have twenty seconds all day long that you could have used to respond to my text message?" I asked her.

"You sent a text message?" she asked dumbly. "I'm sorry, Christian. Again... I didn't... I haven't checked my messages all day. I haven't checked email all day either. But, I promise, I'll make this up to you. I will. I'll come to your place as soon as I'm done here, and then I'm completely yours for the rest of the night. Just give me an hour or so."

"Anastasia, you said you weren't at the office, and it doesn't sound like you've gone home yet either, so where are you?" I asked.

"I'm sitting in my car, with Luke," she answered. She still sounded nervous.

"And where would that be, Ana? Where are you and Luke and your car?"

She took a deep breath before she answered me. "Hyde didn't show up at work today, and I still need to officially fire his ass. So, I'm sitting in the parking lot of his apartment complex. I'm about to go knock on his door. And before you freak out, I'm taking Luke with me, and Ryan and Prescott are also here, in another car. I have plenty of security, and I'm not going to go inside his apartment. I'm just going to stand at his door and read him his rights, so to speak."

If she was trying to keep me from freaking out, it wasn't working. "Anastasia Steele, have you completely fucking lost your mind? You will do no such thing! Do not get out of that car! Do you have any idea how dangerous that asshole is?!"

"Christian, stop it," she said. "I have to do this, and I'm going to do this, and then I will come home and spend the rest of the night with you. I will see you at your apartment in a little while. I'll call you when I'm on the way. And this time, I promise I won't forget to call you. I need to go now. I love you, Christian."

"Anastasia! Do not get out of that car!" I shouted into the phone, but nobody heard me. She had already hung up. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" I screamed. I stormed out of my office. The rest of my office staff had already left for the day.

Taylor showed up at just that moment. "How many eyes do you have on Jack Hyde?" I asked him.

"Two guys, sir. He's still at home. Hasn't left all day."

"Call them. Tell them to keep their eyes on his door and to move in if necessary. Anastasia is there right now, confronting the bastard."

"Shit!" he exclaimed. He called our covert operatives and gave them the orders, and then looked at me as they responded to him. "Confirmed, sir," he said as he hung up the phone. Ms. Steele has just knocked on Hyde's door."


	21. Chapter 21: Firing Hyde (APOV)

**Chapter 21: Firing Jack Hyde** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" His voice actually sounded demonic, nothing like the mild mannered and socially awkward COO that I'd known for the past two years. Was the wild-eyed man standing in front of me really Jack Hyde?

"Anastasia Steele. You just had to have the last word, didn't you? Well, come in, come in." He bowed dramatically like a very bad actor in a high school play.

I stood just outside his apartment with Luke at my side. Two other security officers of mine were standing just a few feet away, and the covert operative I had watching Hyde was still sitting in his car, watching everything, ready to move in if needed.

"No thank you, Mr. Hyde. I just came to speak with you briefly, and then I'll be on my way," I told him, keeping my voice emotionless and showing no reaction to his lack of clothing. He had chosen to answer the door wearing nothing but a pair of faded plaid boxers.

He laughed a sinister laugh, reminding me of a villain in a comic strip series. Then he said snidely, "What you mean to say is that you came to fire me in person. Because Little Miss Perfect Steele doesn't do anything halfway."

I wasn't surprised that he knew. I'd suspected when he hadn't shown up for work today for the first time in the two years he had worked for me, that he knew I was on to him. I was a bit surprised, however, that he was this forthcoming.

"That is correct, Mr. Hyde." I told him, still emotionless, showing him no signs of surprise. "Since you didn't show up for work today, I came here to tell you in person. If you had shown up at Ismintis tomorrow, you wouldn't have been able to get in because your security clearance has already been revoked."

He continued to smirk at me, unconcerned with my words. "I hadn't planned on returning, but I do appreciate the extra effort," he said sarcastically. "Your silly little company has outgrown its usefulness to me. Damn shame, too, but I like the new plan better anyway. As for your stupid company, what kind of name is 'Wisdom International'? Such a fucking joke. I couldn't stand to waste my time there another minute."

I ignored his insult because I recognized that he was trying to bait me. I didn't need his approval to know that Ismintis was much more than a silly little company, and I also realized that his fall from the position of COO of a Fortune 500 company had to be hard to take no matter how much he deserved to be fired. Instead of retaliating, I glanced at Luke and said, "Good. I'm glad that this only took a minute. We will just be on our way, then."

Hyde ignored me. He said, "I am curious though. Which infraction was it that got to you the most? The three million dollars I so skillfully stole from you, or the audio files of your private conversations I sent to the bastard that you're currently screwing?"

I filed that information away, that he was aware that I knew about both things, and that if he was speaking literally, then there was still another $200,000 that I hadn't known about. I wasn't surprised that he knew about Christian and me. Since the media fiasco on Friday, pretty much everyone knew about us, even if we hadn't made it public. I knew we weren't fooling anyone.

"Both of those are equally grievous, don't you think?" I responded.

"What I think is that it's a damn shame you started fucking that bastard and ruined my original plan. It would have been perfect. I'd been planning it for nearly five years, and it was nearly ready to execute. It was the only reason I took the job at your stupid little company. You don't think I enjoyed being your bitch, do you? You think I liked working for a cunt like you? Hell, no. It was all to get to him. I'd have ruined him. Instead, you ruined everything. The one thing I didn't count on was you being a horny bitch. I was sure you were a dyke. If I'd known you like cock and that you like it rough, I'd have played my role differently. I can think of a few other 'positions' I would have enjoyed more. But rest assured, when I execute the new plan, I will tap that ass of yours that you've been flaunting in my face for two fucking years. I can hardly wait to get a piece of that."

What the hell? I glanced at Luke as Hyde began to stroke himself through his thin boxers. Luke looked as disgusted as I felt. "Let's go," I told Luke, and I started to walk away.

"Wait, bitch!" Hyde called out. "I have a little gift for your fuck buddy. He's going to want to see what I have, trust me. Don't go away yet." Hyde turned and went back inside his house.

"Do you think he's going for a gun?" I whispered cautiously to Luke. Once again, I considered leaving, but I wanted to know what he had on Christian. Luke shrugged but took his gun from its holster as a precaution. Ryan and Prescott followed suit.

When Hyde returned a minute later, there were three guns pointed at him. He sneered at me and asked, "Do you really think I'd shoot you while you're literally standing on my front doorstep?"

"I have no idea what you might do, Mr. Hyde," I responded. "I obviously don't know you at all." I motioned to Luke to put his gun away, but Ryan and Prescott kept theirs trained on Hyde.

Hyde laughed his sinister laugh again and said, "You're right about that, bitch. But to be fair, you aren't the only one who didn't know your coworker as well as you thought you did. Who would have thought that prim and proper Princess Anastasia Steele, the queen of pompous bitches, was actually a whips and chains loving, cock-sucking, cum-slurping slut? Surprised the hell out of me. In a good way. Like I said earlier, I can hardly wait to have some fun with you. But I will bide my time, until you and the rat bastard you're fucking least expect it."

I raised one eyebrow at him to show him that I wasn't impressed or intimidated by him. I would never let him know that he was actually scaring me. "I think we're done here," I told Luke.

"Wait! You can't go without this," Hyde called out as I started walking away again. He walked towards me, holding up a USB drive between two fingers.

When Hyde got too close to me, Luke stood between him and me. "Back off!" Luke warned. He put his hands on Hyde's chest and pushed him away.

Hyde ignored Luke, held up the USB drive so I could see it clearly, looked over Luke's shoulder, and said to me, "Give this to your fuck buddy. Tell him it's just a taste of what's to come. I know his secret, and soon, when he least expects it, the entire world will know his secret. And give him this message too: There will always be copies. He can delete whatever the fuck he wants from my hard drive, but there will always be copies. He can't get away from it. This is going to be so much better than the original plan would have been, so thank you, bitch, for ruining it for me."

Luke glanced at me for instruction, and when I nodded, he took the USB drive from Hyde. Luke examined it carefully.

"It's not poisonous," Hyde told him snidely.

"Like I'd believe you," Luke responded.

"I don't really give two shits what you believe," Hyde told Luke. Then he turned to me and said, "One more thing, Princess Anastasia. You know what happened to the first Princess Anastasia? She was killed, tragically. Watch your back, your royal highness. Your goons won't always be there to protect you. I will be watching, and I'll strike when you least expect it."

"Are you seriously threatening my life?" I asked incredulously. "You really are certifiably out of your mind, aren't you?"

Hyde simply laughed again and answered, "Yep. You should have done a more thorough job on your background check when you hired me. Then again, I am a genius, and my Princeton education was real. My job experience before I started working for you was real too. I didn't fake any of that. I just got rid of certain... records."

"Mr. Hyde, I'm leaving now," I told him. "Give my regards to Mr. Dickhead in Addis Ababa."

With that, I walked back to the parking lot, determined not to turn back regardless of what other bullshit came out of his mouth. But he didn't say anything else. Instead, I heard his door slam. Only then did Prescott and Ryan follow Sawyer and me to the parking lot.

Once we were in my car, and Luke was driving us away, I finally began to relax. Holy shit! That was intense. I was shocked at how different this Hyde was to the man who had worked closely with me for two years. I considered myself one of the best at reading people, but this evil bastard had totally bamboozled me. I took a deep breath, got my phone out of my purse, and called Christian. As I called his number, my hands were shaking uncontrollably.

"Anastasia," Christian answered before the phone barely had time to ring even once, and he sounded so worried.

I couldn't hold back the tears, hearing him answer like that. "Christian," I cried out between sobs.

"Oh, God, Ana, did he hurt you? Are you injured? I'll kill him!" Christian sounded panicked.

"I'm not hurt," I told him as I continued to sob, sounding disgusting to myself but unable to do anything about it. "My God, Christian, I didn't even know him."

"Ana, what happened?" Christian asked.

"He was so evil. Like, unreal evil. Like threatening to rape and kill me evil. And Christian, he has your videos. He gave me a thumb drive to give you, and I'm sure that's what is on it. He said he'd expose you to the world. And Christian, he said the only reason he worked for me was to get to you. Everything Samantha suggested this morning was right on. He was framing you, but our relationship ruined his plan, so now he said he has a new plan... and Christian, I think he means to do something even worse."

"He threatened you," Christian whispered, as if that was the only thing he'd heard me say.

"Yeah, he did. But I think he said all that just to get to you. You're the one he really wants to hurt, Christian. He just wants to use me to get to you. My God, what did you do to him? Why does he hate you so much?"

"I have no idea," Christian answered. "Apparently, I just found out today, we were in foster care together in Detroit, but I have no memory of that. I was a traumatized four-year-old who wasn't even able to speak. I didn't know anything about him. I'd never heard of him until he came to work for you."

"Well, he knew who you were," I told him.

"Yeah, I know," Christian responded. "And he's a dangerous son of a bitch."

"You're right," I agreed. "I found that out tonight. I'm sorry that I cut our call short earlier, but I had to confront him."

Christian sounded pissed as he said, "I'm so fucking angry with you about that, but we can talk about it more after you get home. Are you far away?"

I looked out the car window at the traffic and the street signs before I answered, "About twenty minutes away, I think."

"OK," Christian responded, "I need to make a couple of calls in light of what you've just told me, so we can continue this conversation after you get here."

"OK, that's fine," I answered. "And Christian... I'm sorry again for not calling you earlier today."

"Yeah, well, I'm pissed off about that too. But we will talk about it when you get here."

"I think I need to be punished," I suggested flirtatiously.

"Oh, you so need to be punished," he agreed, still sounding angry and unaffected by my flirting. "But don't think that you're going to enjoy it, princess. And don't plan on sitting down tomorrow."

I gulped before I responded. "Whatever pleases you, Ma..."

"Anastasia, don't you fucking dare," he warned, cutting me off. I knew better than to call him Master without my collar on, but I felt like it fit the context of the way our conversation was headed.

"I'm sorry," I responded.

"And stop fucking apologizing. I need to go make those calls. I will see you in a few minutes," he said, and then he ended the call.

I took another deep breath and closed my eyes. I kept them shut the rest of the way back to Escala, trying to calm myself, to find my inner peace. I was still shaken by my encounter with Hyde, and I felt uneasy about the way my conversation with Christian had been cut short.

A few minutes later, I stepped out of the elevator into Christian's penthouse, and when I saw him standing there, my jaw dropped to the floor. Holy shit! I knew he was a Greek god, but this was ridiculous. He was wearing a pair of ripped, faded jeans, with the top button undone. He didn't have on a shirt or shoes, and his ripped body was just begging me to lick him all over.

I didn't have long to stand there drooling, because Christian padded towards me, with an almost feral look in his eyes. Holy shit! This was my Dom, and I was in trouble, but I needed him like I needed air to breathe. He crushed his lips against mine and the kiss we shared felt like he was drinking from me, as if I was cool water and he was dying of thirst.

The kiss lasted a couple of minutes, and as I struggled to catch my breath, Christian said simply, "The thumb drive?"

I answered, still out of breath, "Luke is on his way right now to give it to Samantha and Barney. They need to check it out, make sure there aren't any viruses. Don't worry about Samantha. She's discreet."

Christian's eyes flickered in recognition, but he covered it so quickly I almost missed it. He didn't comment. Instead, he took my hand and said, "Come." He led me into his kitchen, to the breakfast bar. "Sit," he commanded, and I obeyed. He put a plate in front of me, and another in front of his seat. Gail's chicken caesar salad. Perfect. "Eat," Christian commanded, and again, I obeyed him without speaking.

As he sat beside me and ate his own dinner, he never took his eyes off me. I ate in silence until my plate was empty because I knew it would make him happy. As I ate, I glanced around and noticed a couple of things on the table: my collar, and a blindfold. My Dom clearly had plans, and it was just a matter of time before he shared them with me.

Finally, as I finished the last bite, I looked at him and asked teasingly, "Are you going to say anything to me other than one word commands?"

He ignored my teasing tone and answered seriously, "No."

I sighed and decided that I needed to address one of the sources of his anger. "Christian, look, I know you didn't want me to confront Hyde, but you can't order me to stay in my car and expect me to obey you. I've made it clear to you that you can't control me outside of our sex life. It's all laid out in our contract."

I'd clearly said the wrong thing, as was evidenced by his pushing back his chair, standing quickly, and storming out of the room. "Christian!" I called after him.

He returned in just a minute, holding some papers in his hand, which he ripped up angrily in front of me as he spit words at me. "Do you want to know what I think of this God damned contract, Anastasia? I fucking told you when we made it that we didn't fucking need it. You said you wanted to sign it for 'symbolic reasons' or some shit like that. Hell, Ana, we don't even have any rules outside of the playroom, and I agreed to that. I've never fucking done this shit before, but I want it, with you. When I told you not to get out of the fucking car at Hyde's, it wasn't because I was trying to control you like some fucking submissive. It was because I was trying to protect the woman I love, and I couldn't fucking do that because you were so fucking determined to put yourself in danger."

Once again, I couldn't hold back my tears, but I ignored them and just let them fall as I responded to him, "Christian, I had Sawyer right there at my side, and Ryan and Prescott just a few feet away. They were all armed. And I had a covert operative in a car just a few more feet away, ready to move in if needed."

"You had three covert operatives," he corrected me. "I have two guys watching Hyde myself."

"See," I told him. "With all that security, I was safe."

"You weren't safe, Anastasia. That bastard could have hurt you, even with all your security. Do you know what it would do to me if something happened to you? And how the hell am I supposed to protect you if you keep putting yourself at risk?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I asked, feeling defensive. "I'm not stupid, Christian. I am careful..."

"Bullshit," he cut me off. "What about the night we met, Anastasia? How careful were you then?"

"What do you mean, Christian? I trusted you..."

"Yeah, until you found out who I was," he spit out bitterly. "Then, you couldn't wait to get away from me. You left there without a way home, without your purse, without your jacket, without even your fucking shoes. How the hell did you even get home?"

"Luke," I answered, feeling humbled. "And without panties too," I reminded him. I thought it might diffuse him, but it only made him angrier.

"Without a bra or panties, in a sexy as hell dress, in the fucking rain, in the middle of the night, in downtown fucking Seattle. What the hell were you thinking, Ana?"

I bowed my head submissively. He had me. I was ashamed as I answered weakly, "I was thinking that Christian Grey, my arch enemy, had just rocked my world."

He ignored my weak dig at him. "Thank God Sawyer was there to take you home. I didn't even know who you were until after you left, and even if I had, I couldn't go after you because you were too afraid of me at the time. Ana, you've got to start taking your safety more seriously. And listen to me when I am trying to protect you. Stop thinking I'm trying to control you. I'm not your fucking Dom outside of the playroom."

"You look like my fucking Dom right now," I told him, trying to lighten the conversation again. I let my eyes roam his body again. That chest, which was fucking perfect in spite of his scars, and I could touch him there! I was the only one who could touch him there. It made me feel almost giddy. And those abs. And those sexy fucking jeans. God, I wanted him. But then a disturbing thought occurred to me.

"What's that look for, princess?" he asked. "Your face just went from wanting to devour me to looking worried as hell."

"You just ripped up our contract," I reminded him.

"Yeah, because we don't need a fucking contract. We never did. We've never had a D/s relationship, not really. And we never will."

"But... what does that mean?" I asked "Do you not want to take me into the playroom any more?"

"Oh, I fucking want to take you into the playroom, you bet your sweet ass, I do," he answered. "I want to spank your ass until you can't walk for a week. And then I want to fuck you so hard that you'll never go a day without thinking of me again."

"Christian, I didn't go today without thinking of you," I corrected him.

"Then why the hell couldn't you call me?" he asked. "Thirty fucking seconds, Anastasia. That's all it would have taken. If you thought of me at all, you could have sent a fucking text message. That would have taken what, ten seconds of your time?"

I felt ashamed again. "It was a hard day," I said lamely.

"I realize that, princess. Which is why I wanted to be there for you. But you didn't answer my call or return my messages."

"I'm sorry, Christian," I whispered.

"Stop fucking apologizing," he commanded.

"What do you want me to do?" I asked. "How can I make it up to you? I can promise you that it will never happen again. Seriously, it won't. But what can I do to make you feel better right now? You didn't answer my question... or at least I didn't understand your answer." I picked up my collar from the table and asked him, "How does this work without a contract? Will you still put this on me, and will I still be yours when I wear it? Can I still call you Master, and will you still punish me?"

Christian blew out air in exasperation. "Yes, to all of the above. We have never needed a fucking contract to do what we enjoy doing." He took my collar from me and asked, "Do you want this?"

"Yes," I answered wholeheartedly.

"All of the same playroom rules still apply," he explained. "We know what they are. Is that what you want?"

"Yes, Christian. Please," I answered.

"Tell me what you want, princess," he prompted me, and I knew exactly what he wanted to hear.

I knelt in front of him, bowed my head submissively, and said, "Please, punish me, Master."

Christian sucked in all the air in the room, so it seemed, and then he blew it out slowly. "You are so fucking beautiful," he muttered. He stared at me for another few seconds before he stood up and put the collar around my neck. I remained in my submissive position, with my head bowed.

Christian towered above me, and he began to command me in his Dom voice. "Look at me," he said, and I snapped my eyes to his. He kept eye contact with me as he reached over and took a couple of things from the table. "Hold out your hands in front of you." When I did he placed a key and a blindfold in my hands. "This is the key to the playroom. I want you to be there, waiting for me in exactly twenty minutes. In the meantime, go take a shower. After you shower, take down your hair from that bun. Then, once you're in position in the playroom, put on the blindfold and place your hands behind your back."

"Yes, Master," I responded.

Without another word, Christian turned and walked towards his office. I stood and quickly made my way upstairs, to the playroom, feeling nervous but excited about what was to come.


	22. Chapter 22: The Punishment (APOV)

**Chapter 22: Punishment** _(Anastasia's POV)_

As I knelt in the red room, waiting for Christian, my mind went back to everything that had happened in the past few hours, from my learning that Hyde was indeed my mole to my unnerving confrontation with him, and how shocking his behavior had been. I thought about the threat he posed to Christian, and I considered what actions I could take to protect the man I love.

The man I love. Yes, I most certainly loved Christian Grey with all my heart, but I sure hadn't acted like it today. How could I have gone the entire day without calling him? What kind of girlfriend was I, especially in light of the fact that this kind of relationship was so new to Christian? It was no wonder that he'd been so angry... and hurt... He had every right to be. And now, here I was, waiting to be punished by my Dom, not because we had a contract that required it, because even our old contract that Christian had torn up had not required this punishment, over something that happened outside of the playroom. No, I was here because it was where I wanted to be and where Christian wanted me to be. Even so, I couldn't help the niggling fear that he would hurt me. Could I trust him not to, even when he was justifiably angry with me? If he took it too far, should I use a safe word, or just take it without complaint?

How much time had passed? I was sure it had been longer than twenty minutes since Christian had given me the orders to come here, take a shower, and prepare for him. Surely I had been kneeling here, blindfolded as he had directed, for at least ten minutes, if not longer. Where was he? Was he intentionally making me wait, as part of my punishment?

I guessed that Christian was probably busy at the moment dealing with the fall-out from my meeting with Hyde. He knew now that Hyde had his videos. I wondered if Samantha and Barney had seen them yet. I cringed to myself, not wanting anyone to see that side of Christian, not even our most trusted security staff. And then there was also the question of what to do about Elena Lincoln. It was obvious that she had sold Hyde those videos. I hoped at the very least that this meant Christian would get rid of her salons and end his business relationship with her, since she could no longer blackmail him with something she had already sold to the highest bidder. I hoped even more that we would be able to find other young men who would come forward and testify against her for molesting them… because I was sure that they existed, that Christian had not been the only one. I wanted the bitch to go to prison.

The sound of the door opening distracted me from my dark thoughts. He didn't say a word, but I felt his presence fill the room. My Dom was here, and my heart rate increased at the thought of what he was about to do. I heard him moving around the room, opening and closing drawers and doors. I heard a heavy dragging sound, as if he were moving large furniture. And then, music. Classical. Something I recognized vaguely. Chopin? Bach?

And then, there he was, right in front of me. His hand was on my head, and I leaned into his touch. And then I felt him pulling my hair, but still he didn't speak, and I knew better than to say anything. What was he doing? Braiding my hair? Yes, that is exactly what he was doing. I felt the heavy braid hit my back as he let it go, and then he was in front of me again.

I felt him rub my cheek. Wait… was that…? Oh, yes it was! He was rubbing his penis against my face. I turned and licked it, hoping he would take the hint and let me blow his mind, as I knew it would, as I knew it always did when I gave him head. But instead, he pulled away from me, and the next thing I knew, he had pinched both of my nipples, hard.

"Aahhggh!" I cried out.

"Hush," he responded. "Let's try that again." Once again, I felt the soft skin of his penis rubbing my face. What was he doing, and what did he want from me? I knew how much he liked my blow jobs. Surely, that would make him happy. I turned my head again, and put my mouth around the head of his penis.

Immediately, I felt him step back, pulling his cock from my mouth with a pop, and then, I felt the hard pinch on my nipples again.

"Ouch! Shit!" I cried.

This time, he continued to pinch and pull at my nipples, and the pain soon turned to pleasure. He said, "Let's get something clear, princess. I am the Dom tonight. I have made it clear to you over the past couple of days that I'm willing to switch with you, so if you want to be in charge, you can do it another time. But not tonight. I'm in charge here, and there will be no topping from the bottom. You are to remain perfectly quiet and perfectly still until I ask you a question or give you a command. Is that understood?"

I think I trembled a little as I answered, "Yes, Master." Oh, shit! What was he going to do? But I thought about his words. He kept bringing it up, so he obviously was very interested in switching. Did I want to dominate him? I realized in that moment how much I would enjoy teasing him. It would be fun to tie him up and bring him to the brink of orgasm a few times before finally allowing him to come. Tonight, I wanted him to control me. I wanted him to punish me because I deserved to be punished for how I had neglected him today. But in the near future… maybe… For the first time, I was warming up to the idea of being in charge of his pleasure.

His hands left my body, and I didn't feel him for a minute or two. Where had he gone? And then, there he was again, in front of me. "Stand up," he commanded, and I got to my feet. "Come," he said, and he led me, with one hand on my elbow and the other on my ass, across the room. When we got to where he wanted us, he didn't speak, but instead lifted me and placed me on what I recognized as his spanking bench. He made sure that my knees were secure on each side before he cuffed my ankles into the shackles. He left me kneeling like that and walked away. I wasn't sure whether I should lean over the bench and assume the position, or if I should wait for him to position me the way he wanted me. But I kept his command in mind, and I remained perfectly still.

"Good girl," he said, as he came back to stand in front of me. He took my hand, and placed something in it. Then he took my other hand and brought it up so that I could examine the object with both hands. "Do you know what this is?" he asked.

I felt the smooth leather of the flat object that felt somewhat like an oversized ping pong paddle. "A paddle?" I asked.

"Yes, good. I am going to strike you ten times with it, and you will keep count."

I gulped. Was I ready for this kind of punishment? So far, he'd only used a riding crop, and it hadn't been very painful. I had a feeling that this was going to hurt more. "OK, Master," I told him.

"What are your safe words?" he asked.

"Yellow means slow down. Red means stop," I answered.

"Do not hesitate to use them," he reminded me. And there, I had my answer to what I had been wondering earlier. I realized that Christian trusted me to use the safe words just as much as I trusted him not to hurt me. Did I trust him not to hurt me? Yes, I did. He wouldn't hurt me. The fear I'd felt earlier was just nerves.

Christian took the paddle from me. Then, he pushed down on my back so that I was leaning over the bench properly, with my ass sticking up in the air. He took each of my hands and placed them exactly where he wanted them, on each side of the bench, parallel with my ankles. I lay perfectly still as he cuffed my wrists into place. I was exactly where he wanted me, and I couldn't move at all.

He rubbed my ass, and then he reached down and rubbed my folds with two fingers. He sounded astonished when he said, "You're already so wet, princess. I think you're enjoying this." I didn't respond, and he continued to tease me. And then, I felt him licking me. Oh God, that felt good, and oh God, I wanted to come! I knew he would never allow me to come as long as I was being punished. He'd made it clear that I should never come while blindfolded. But how was I supposed to prevent it? I wanted to squeeze my knees together to stop the building tension, but of course, that was impossible seeing as how I was shackled to the spanking bench. My dilemma became even worse when he sank his two fingers into my core and began to pump. I couldn't hold back a moan.

"If you come, I will double the number of strikes," he warned me as he continued to pump his fingers in and out. And then, his tongue was on my clit. He sucked it into his mouth as he continued to attack it with his tongue. I bit my lip and held my breath, trying my best to hold back not only another moan but also the impending orgasm.

The next thing I knew, Christian removed his fingers and stood up, making me immediately miss the contact. "Breathe, princess," he commanded. I released the breath I'd been holding, and he began to rub my ass with the palm of his hand again.

I heard the swish through the air as he swung the paddle before I felt the sting on my ass. I wanted to cry out, because it really hurt. But instead, I took another deep breath and called out, "One, Master!" I didn't want him to stop. It wasn't unbearable, at least not yet.

He hit me two more times, and I counted each one, before he stopped and rubbed my ass again. Holy shit, it hurt! Each strike was a little harder than the previous one, and I felt like my ass was on fire. By the third strike, my tears were soaking into the blindfold, and I felt my nose running a little. When he heard me sniffle, he stopped momentarily. But it wasn't more than I could handle, so I didn't need to use a safe word. Christian didn't ask me. Instead, he dipped his fingers into my pussy again. This time, he didn't comment about my wetness, but he did whistle, showing his approval. "Good girl," he was all that he said.

He resumed the paddling, and I resumed counting, and even though my tears and sniffles increased, I still did not need to safe word. The strikes were still very painful, but never more painful that the third one had been. This time, he got up to number seven before he stopped and rubbed my ass again. "Your ass is the most glorious shade of red right now," he said proudly. I didn't respond since he hadn't asked a question. He dipped his fingers into me again, but this time, he spread the juices to my rear entrance. Before I knew what was happening, he was pumping his finger in and out of my ass. With his other hand, he inserted two fingers into my pussy and began to mirror the pumping action there too. I felt an orgasm building quickly. Oh, God, how would I ever be able to hold it back? But then, just when I thought I couldn't hold back any longer, he stopped his movements as quickly as he had begun them.

"Three more to go," he reminded me. I counted eight, nine, and ten. Then I heard the paddle hit the floor. "Good girl," he repeated.

The next thing I felt was his tongue on my clit again. He sucked it for a minute or two, but then, to my shock, he moved back to my rear entrance again. Holy hell! He was licking my asshole! And damn, it felt amazing! He used his fingers to rub my clit as he laved my asshole. Oh God! I was going to come!

"Master, please!" I cried out.

"Not yet, princess," he responded, clearly recognizing that I needed to come and refusing to allow me to. But he stopped licking and rubbing me. And then, I felt him releasing my cuffs, beginning with my wrists, and then my ankles. He helped me stand up, and then he led me across the room, until I felt the bed in front of me. "On the bed, on all fours," he ordered me.

Obediently, I climbed onto the bed, onto my hands and knees. Seconds later, I felt him behind me, rubbing my asshole again with fingers that felt wet and slick, and the next thing I knew, there was a toy vibrating in my ass. Oh holy shit! First his tongue, and now this... How was I supposed to hold back? Then, just as quickly, he grabbed my hips, rammed his cock into me, and began to fuck me furiously. He was pumping so hard that I knew I would come very quickly... there would be no holding it back. Then, as he continued to fuck me, he also jiggled the toy in my ass, causing the vibrations to feel more intense. At the same time, with his other hand, he pulled my braid forcing me to lift my head up, so he could kiss my neck. He continued to fuck me hard as he pulled the blindfold from my my eyes. As I blinked and my eyes adjusted to the dim light in the room, I noticed a mirror directly in front of us. My eyes locked with his as he continued to fuck me without slowing down. Oh. God, this was hot! Watching him fuck me was the most exciting experience that I could ever remember.

He pinched my nipples as he said, "Come with me, princess," and then he grunted as he emptied himself in me. At the same time, I cried out as I finally let it go. The force of the wave almost took my breath away, and I could see as I gazed into his eyes, in the mirror, that his own orgasm was having the same effect on him. And then, before it had passed, it suddenly became more intense as he removed the toy from my ass. Before I could get used to the empty feeling though, his tongue was there again, licking my asshole. My orgasm had barely ended before a new one began.

"Master, I'm coming again, and I can't see your eyes," I warned him.

He spoke without raising his head, "Let it go, princess." And I did, twice more, as he continued to lave my ass with his tongue and pump my pussy with either his fingers or the toy, I wasn't always sure which. My head was now on the bed, with my arms spread above, and my ass was in the air, completely at his mercy.

Christian stopped licking me, and for a minute he didn't speak. He seemed to be waiting for me to catch my breath, or maybe he was catching his. Then, at last, he tugged my braid, forcing me to lift my head from the pillow and look into his eyes, in the mirror.

"I'm going to claim your ass now," he said. In the mirror, I saw my eyes widen. I'm sure he saw the fear in them, because he said, "I'll go slow. And you have your safe words, if it's too painful. But it will only hurt for a few seconds. After that, it will feel good. This is for your pleasure too."

I swallowed before I nodded and said, "OK, Master."

"Don't take your eyes off me," he said. "Keep watching me, in the mirror."

I obeyed him as he began to kiss my neck and run his hands over my breasts. He took my hands and lifted them up, placing them behind his head. His hands were then exploring my body, and I watched in fascination in the mirror as he circled my breasts, tweaked my nipples, and then rubbed my belly, downward until he reached my slit. His fingers slipped inside me and began to pump. He watched my face as I became more and more aroused, and I saw the same arousal evident in his own eyes. And then I felt him, at my rear entrance. He watched my face intently as he pushed himself, just a few inches, inside my anus. I saw and felt the sweat on my forehead. Once the head of his cock was inside me, he stopped so that I could adjust to it.

"How does that feel?" he asked.

I swallowed again before I replied. "Not very different from a butt plug at the moment. But you're not all the way in yet."

"No, not even close," he answered. Then he moved a little, causing him to slide another inch or two inside me. He still watched my face carefully.

Surprisingly, I liked how he felt inside me. It had hurt a little at first, but now it just felt full. And I needed him to move. I wanted him to fill me the rest of the way, and then to move. "Please, Master," I pleaded.

"What do you want, princess?" he asked, looking a little alarmed. "If I'm hurting you too much, you need to tell me."

"No... I need you to fuck me," I answered.

He chuckled a little and then moved so that he slipped another inch inside me. "You want me to fuck your pretty ass?" he asked teasingly.

"Yes, Master," I answered, sounding desperate.

He kept his cock perfectly still inside my ass as he began to tweak my nipples and kiss my neck. "Beg me," he whispered in my ear.

I felt my juices running down my thighs, I was getting so wet. "Please, Master," I pleaded. "Please... fuck my ass... Master."

He looked me in the eyes as he began to move. "I've been thinking about DP-ing you ever since our conversation this morning. And as much as I enjoyed filling your ass with that vibrator while I fucked your pussy, this right here... this is what I've really been looking forward to." And with that, he really began to move. He pulled all the way out, and then slammed back into me. And then he repeated that action, again and again. And it felt... so good. Really fucking good, no pun intended. I liked it so much more than I had expected to.

Without slowing down the least bit, he grabbed a dildo that was lying on the bed next to us, and he slid it into my vagina. He pumped me with it as he continued fucking my ass. I closed my eyes and moaned. I had never felt anything this powerful before. "Oh God!" I said out loud.

"Eyes on me," he commanded, causing my eyes to snap open. "Play with your nipples," he ordered me. I moved my hands from behind his head and obeyed him, not taking my eyes from his. He nibbled my ear without taking his eyes off mine. A few seconds later, he whispered in my ear, "Come with me again, Anastasia," and I did, gloriously, as I felt him unload into my ass.

Then and there, I decided that if punishments in the playroom were always going to end like this, then I wanted to do more to be punished by him, as often as possible. Holy shit!

And then, of course, there was the aftercare. Christian massaged my shoulders and arms, down my back, and my hips and legs. He rubbed my ass with some kind of ointment. He even massaged my ankles and the soles of my feet. I was so relaxed that I drifted off to sleep.

* * *

 _"I told you to watch your back," the evil voice sneered. "I warned you! Anyone with a name like Princess Anastasia should expect a tragic end, don't you think, your royal highness? You really should have taken more care. You made this so easy for me. And now, I'm going to enjoy this."_

 _I looked around me and noticed immediately that I was in the red room. How the hell did Hyde get me in here? I was shackled to the bed, spread eagle, totally naked. And I felt terrified. To make matters worse, Hyde was coming towards me. He was still wearing nothing but those damned faded boxers, and what he was holding in his hands made the hairs on the back of my head stand on end. It was one of Christian's canes. Christian would never use this on me; it was a hard limit. But I knew that Hyde was about to beat me with it._

 _"No!" I cried out. "Christian! Help me!" Where was Christian? Why wasn't he here?_

 _"Anastasia!" Hyde called out mockingly._

 _"No, no, no!" I cried._

 _"Anastasia!" he called more urgently, and then he was shaking me. Why was he shaking me?_

"Anastasia!" Christian's voice called to me, more urgent than before. I opened my eyes, blinking to clear my confused brain.

"Oh, thank God! It was a dream! Oh, my God, it felt so real!" I cried and clung to Christian.

Christian held me and ran his fingers through my hair as I cried on his shoulder. For several minutes, neither of us spoke. I continued to cling to Christian, with my head resting on his chest. Little by little, as I listened to his heartbeat and gentle breathing, I was able to relax. It took me some time to realize that we were no longer in the red room. We were in Christian's bedroom, in his bed. I must have been asleep when he brought me here.

"I'm sorry," I told him.

"For what?" he asked, sounding confused.

"I'm sure I disturbed you," I answered. "You must have been sleeping too. It's the middle of the night, isn't it?"

"It's 2:15 a.m." he said after checking the clock by his side of the bed. "But if there's one thing I understand well, it's being awakened in the middle of the night by nightmares."

I trembled a little as I recalled the nightmare. "Fucking Hyde," I muttered.

Christian held me a little tighter. "It was just a nightmare, princess. I'll never let him hurt you."

"He called me princess too," I remembered.

"Oh?" Christian asked.

I explained, "But when he said it, it was to mock me. When you call me princess, I feel cherished. It's completely different."

"Because I do cherish you, Anastasia. I love you," he said.

"I love you too, Christian," I responded. I contemplated a minute before I told him, "It unnerves me that he calls me princess. I don't like that he calls me the same thing you do."

"I'm sure he did it to unnerve you," Christian replied.

I continued to contemplate. "Do you think...? Is there any way he could know...?" I didn't want to finish my question because the thought was too frightening.

"Are you wondering if he knows that I call you princess?" Christian asked, and I nodded. "It doesn't take any stretch of the imagination. You do get your name from a famous princes, after all. If you are afraid that he heard or saw us together when we were playing, stop worrying. I'm certain that he didn't."

"But Christian," I argued, "He knows that I'm into BDSM too. How could he know that?"

Christian sighed before he replied, "Princess, he was fucking with your mind. It's how assholes like him get off. He doesn't know shit about your private life; he just wants you to think he does. He knows that I'm into BDSM because he got those damn videos. Six of them anyway. It only took viewing a few seconds of one of them to know what I'm into. And it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out that we're sleeping together. Hell, after Friday's media fiasco, most of the country assumes it. So in his deranged mind, that makes you guilty by association."

"His deranged mind would be assuming correctly in this instance though," I said.

"No, he isn't. Anastasia, I would never do to you what I did to the women in those videos. There was no love in it. None whatsoever."

I sighed. "So... he was just fucking with me," I repeated Christian's words.

"Yes," he assured me.

"And... there's no way... But what about the play party? Is it possible he was there, watching us?" I asked.

"There is absolutely no way that he was there watching us or anyone else at the play party," Christian assured me. "It was Chad's private residence. His private party. He's a friend... one of Elliot's best friends, in fact. I know everyone who was on his guest list. Security is tight; otherwise, I wouldn't have even considered taking you there. And baby, the only other places we've played has been my office and here, so I promise, you're safe. Nobody has seen you except the people at the play party."

"OK," I responded.

"OK," he repeated.

"So... you said he got six of your videos. Does that mean Samantha and Barney opened the files on the thumb drive?"

"Mmm hmm," he answered. "No viruses. Just six videos of some of the most compromising moments of my life. In the hands of that evil son of a bitch."

"Shit!" I exclaimed.

"Yeah," Christian agreed.

"What are you going to do about the filthy cunt?" I asked him.

"Send her ass to prison," he responded without hesitation. "Oh, and give you her salons, effective tomorrow. Or later today, I mean. It's already tomorrow."

"What?" I asked, confused.

Christian explained, "The contract I sent her today... I mean yesterday... is invalid because she already violated the terms. So that means I don't need to wait a week to transfer ownership. I will come by your office later today and give you the paperwork. The Esclava salon line is yours, just as I warned her it would be. You can either keep it, give it away, or sell it to the highest bidder. Whatever you want. I really don't give a rat's ass."

"Are they profitable?" I asked.

"Yes, they've done quite well," he answered. "I've had her audited six times in the past three years just to make sure she wasn't stealing from me. She's done well enough that she could have easily paid me back. She no longer needed my financial backing. She just didn't want to let go of control of me. Well, too fucking bad for her. Won't matter anyway, because she can't run a chain of beauty salons from prison."

"But how are you going to send her to prison?" I asked. "Have you found more boys?"

"Yep, he answered. "One even works for me. And her current sub... or most recent anyway... is only seventeen. I'm hoping to speak with him tomorrow, but I've already spoken to the boy who works for me, and he's willing to press charges against her. The bitch is going down."

"That's great," I told him.

"Mmm hmm," he agreed. We were both quiet for a few minutes, and then he asked me, "How do you feel about tonight, princess?"

"Tonight?" I asked. My mind was still on Lincoln and Hyde, so I honestly didn't know what he was referring to.

"How sore are you?" he asked.

"Oh, that," I answered, blushing. "Not as sore as I expected to be." I looked up and into his eyes before I continued. "I liked it."

"I noticed," he said softly and seductively. "And the punishment? How do you feel about it?"

I considered my answer for a moment. "I don't think I'll ever enjoy pain, but it wasn't too much. I felt that I deserved it after neglecting you all day. That will never happen again."

He sighed and replied, "Don't make promises you can't keep, princess. We're both CEOs of multi-billion dollar companies. We have busy lives. That's not going to change. I just want to know that you're OK. It's part of my nature to need to protect you, and if I can't reach you, I can't be sure that you're safe."

I assured him, "The first thing I'm doing to do when I get to the office is to make sure that Hannah and the rest of my executive staff know that if you call, you are to be put straight through to me no matter what I'm doing."

Christian didn't respond in words. Instead, he pulled me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me. "Sleep, princess," he said after a minute. And we both did.


	23. Chapter 23: Isaac Horowitz (CPOV)

**Chapter 23: Isaac Horowitz** _(Christian's POV)_

I woke up rested again, for the fifth day in a row. The light was just beginning to brighten the Seattle sky outside my bedroom windows. I realized with a smile on my face what had awakened me. Had I died and gone to Heaven? I could really get used to waking up like this.

When Anastasia moaned as she took another inch of my cock down her throat, I pulled back the duvet so I could watch her. Perfection. Absolute and utter perfection. How the hell did I end up with this goddess? And how would I ever be able to sleep again without her by my side? She might be the one to play submissive when we were in the playroom, but she had me on my knees. She had me by the balls, both literally and figuratively.

"Anastasia, princess, I'm not going to last," I warned her as she began to stroke my balls.

"Mmm..." she responded as she sucked me further down her throat, and then she swallowed. Holy shit! When she swallowed a second time, I was a goner. I let out a loud moan as I lost my load down her throat. She swallowed it all, and slurped at my cock as if she were greedy for more. It wouldn't take much of that for her to make me hard again.

"Come here, princess," I said as I pulled her towards me.

She raised her head and smiled at me proudly. "Good morning!" she called out cheerily.

"The best fucking morning ever," I answered her. "You can wake me up like that any time, sweetheart. But I think it's time for a little payback."

She pulled away from me, still smiling. "We don't have time for that," she said. "But we do have time for a shower. And I like your idea of saving time and water. With that, she sashayed her naked ass into the bathroom. I jumped out of the bed, hot on her heels.

"I'm going to get you good and dirty before I get you good and clean," I told her.

"Promises, promises," she answered snarkily.

In the shower, I made her put one foot up on the shower seat as I knelt in front of her and ate her out. I loved the sounds of her little pants and screams just as much as I loved the way she tugged at my hair. By the time she threw her head back and screamed my name out as she came gloriously in my mouth, I was hard enough to pound nails. I made her come twice more as I fucked her hard against the shower wall, and then we took the shower gel and washed one another. I realized, a little shocked at myself, that I loved the intimacy of our bathing one another just as much as I loved fucking her.

As we stepped out of the shower and I dried her with a fluffy towel, I asked her, "Are you sore from last night?"

"Not at all," she answered. "I thought my ass would hurt a little, but it doesn't. I'm a little stiff from my workout this morning, but that's all."

"You worked out this morning?" I asked.

"Mmm hmm," she answered as she towel dried her hair and then began to put lotion on her legs. "I was getting lazy, missing too many days. I hadn't worked out since last Thursday morning. So I woke up at five and went home for about an hour. When I got back, I figured you'd already be awake, but you were still sound asleep. Your ass was uncovered, and I couldn't resist. But that's why I wouldn't let you touch me when we were in bed... because I was still sweaty."

"Baby, I like you sweaty," I said with a smirk.

"Yeah, well, it's different if you're the one getting me sweaty," she smirked back at me.

As I watched her pull her stockings up her delectable legs, I wanted to take her again. Instead, I finished shaving, and then I started getting dressed. But I couldn't take my eyes off her as she blew her hair dry and then continued to get dressed in the clothes she had brought from her place when she returned from her workout.

"I'm getting lazy, too," I told her. "I need to call Claude. I haven't worked out with him since last Wednesday. I cancelled on him last Friday."

"I can't imagine why," she said with her cute little giggle. But then she looked up at me and looked serious. "Speaking of Friday... I think it's time for a new press release. Maybe even a press conference. Both of our PR teams seemed positive about what our relationship could do for our public images. And I'm worried about what's going to happen to yours if Hyde releases those videos. If you're already known to be in a committed relationship with me, it will help."

I didn't answer her immediately. I'd already been giving this a lot of thought, but I still didn't know what to do about it. One one hand, I really wanted to let the world know that Anastasia was mine and that I was committed to her. On the other hand, I knew that if my reputation was ruined by those damn videos, hers might be too, by association with me. At the very least, questions would be asked about her sexual preferences, and I didn't want her to have to go through all that. It was too risky. I couldn't bring her down with me.

When I didn't answer her quickly enough, she stepped in front of me, looked in my eyes, and said firmly, "Stop it! What you're thinking right now... just stop it! I'm in love with you, Christian Grey, and if you feel even remotely the same way, you won't let fear of Jack Hyde or those fucking videos stop you from making our relationship public. I want this, Christian. For you, yes, but for me too."

I couldn't hold back my smile. "Who's the Dom here?" I asked her.

She giggled again, warming my heart. "Yeah, about that... If you're still interested in switching sometime... I might be willing to give it a try."

I gaped at her. "Really?" Could she really want to top me? I was shocked, not only at her, but at my own excitement at that thought.

"Really," she answered. She explained as she finished getting dressed, and then started putting her hair up in that bun she always insists wearing it in for work. "I'm not sure it's something I'll want to do more than once, but I think it would be fun to do it at least once. I mean, I really like giving up control. It's a release for me, since I'm always in control, any other time, but when you collar me, I love the since of abandon that I feel. I don't want to give that up. But just once, it will be interesting to find out what it's like to control your pleasure." Then she looked up at me and smiled evilly. "Or to withhold it."

Suddenly, all of the blood in my body rushed to my cock. I couldn't speak as I just stood there gaping at her.

Anastasia giggled again and said, "God, the look on your face. For a big bad Dom, you sure do seem excited about the idea of giving up control."

"Only to you, Anastasia," I managed to get out. "Only to you, ever."

She smiled radiantly at me before she turned and worked on her make-up. "OK, but let's plan for it. I'm not ready to do it yet. I need to mentally prepare, and get some pointers from Kate." She looked up at me in the mirror as she smiled her evil smile again and added, "I'm going to enjoy making your ass as red as you made mine last night. We need to discuss your limits before we do this."

She had totally knocked me off kilter, but I managed to regain my composure as I told her, "You have free reign of my ass, and I wouldn't expect anything less from you."

"Free reign of your ass," she repeated, pretending to contemplate that thought. "That gives me all kinds of naughty ideas." She finished putting on her lipstick and then air kissed me.

"Are you always this frisky after you work out, Madame Anastasia?" I asked her.

She giggled again. "That's Goddess Anastasia to you," she reminded me, making me laugh too. She continued, "Usually not, but I didn't take as much time as usual for yoga. I was too anxious to get back to you."

I couldn't take my eyes off hers, she had me so enraptured. "Seriously, princess, what happened to my sweet, shy, submissive? Not that I'm complaining... not at all. You're just as hot, either way."

"Oh, she's still in here," she answered, motioning at her body. "She'll come out again when you need her. Just like your big bad Dom, who isn't anywhere near this room right now. I like this, Christian. I like the idea of switching roles as we need it. And this morning, you don't need a sub, who needs your permission to touch your cock." She walked towards me, and when she got close enough, she reached out and stroked my cock. "Tell me, honestly, how many of your subs ever woke you up like that?"

I smirked at her, not allowing her to disarm me again, no matter how good she was at it. I didn't stop her from stroking me; I was enjoying it too much. "None of them, as you well know. They couldn't wake me up because they were never in the room with me when I slept. You're something else, princess. I mean Goddess. And for the record, I could get used to waking up like that." I finally pulled her hand away from my engorged cock and spatted her ass as I added, "Come on, let's go get you fed, you tigress."

She took my outstretched hand and walked with me towards the kitchen. "You ain't seen anything yet," she said seductively, making my cock even harder. I was tempted to bend her over the table and fuck her again, but we would both be late if I did that. Damn work to hell!

As we ate breakfast, we both checked and responded to emails. Ana took two business calls before she even finished her granola. I might have been bothered by that, but I had my own emails that needed my immediate attention.

When we were both almost finished eating, Taylor stepped into the room and cleared his throat.

I looked up and asked, "What is it, Taylor? You can say anything in front of Ms. Steele."

"Sir, Isaac Horowitz is at a coffee shop on Second Avenue, near the Central Library. It looks like he may be headed to the library after he leaves the coffee shop. If we leave now, we can probably catch him en route. I recommend asking him to have a conversation with you in your car to avoid being seen with him publicly."

"Who is Isaac Horowitz?" Ana asked.

"Elena Lincoln's latest submissive. At least, I think he's her latest. I found out yesterday that he's only seventeen years old, and she's been screwing him for two years already. I want to convince him to press charges. His testimony would be even better for us than the kid who works for me because Horowitz is still a minor."

Ana nodded. "See, I knew it." She stood up and put her phone in her purse. "You'd better get going." She looked up at Taylor and asked, "Is Sawyer here yet?"

"Yes, ma'am, he's waiting in the control room. I'm sure he's on his way now, since he could hear our conversation on the security footage."

Ana blushed a little, as I'm sure she was recalling what else might have been overheard on the security footage. But she regained her composure so quickly an average person wouldn't have even noticed. "Taylor, I've told you already, don't call me ma'am. Just 'yes, Ana," will suffice. She didn't wait for him to respond as she turned to me and asked, "Are you ready?" When I nodded, smirking at her for her dominant behavior, she ignored the look on my face, took my hand, and led us towards the foyer, where Sawyer was waiting for us. Again, I marveled at myself, actually enjoying her dominance.

In the elevator, I kissed her goodbye, totally ignoring Taylor and Sawyer. With my nose pressed against hers, I told her, "I'll call you after I talk with Horowitz. And I'll come by to see you later, with paperwork."

She kissed me again before she promised, "No matter what I'm doing, I'll take your call. And no matter what I'm doing when you come by, I'll stop for you. And in the meantime, I'll get my PR team on that statement we need to make today. My team will be in touch with your team, to make sure they're all on the same page."

I knew it was pointless to argue with her about it, so I nodded. And then we were off, Ana to Ismintis, and me, with any luck, to find Isaac Horowitz.

Luck must have been with me, because about fifteen minutes after I got into my car, Taylor pulled up to a curb and said, "My sources tell me he's still in the coffee shop, sir. How do you want to play this?"

I didn't have time to answer, because at that moment, a young man walked out of the coffee shop with a backpack on his shoulder. And damn if he didn't look like me. He had a similar build to what I had when I'd been his age, and he even had reddish colored hair. He started walking in the direction of the library.

"Is that him?" I asked Taylor.

"Yes, sir, I believe so," he answered.

I didn't waste any time as I jumped out of the car and rushed after the kid. "Mr. Horowitz?" I called after him.

When he heard his name, he stopped and turned to acknowledge me. When he saw my face, his jaw dropped in shock. "Yes?" he asked hesitantly.

"Are you Isaac Horowitz?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered, still hesitant, and confused. "I'm Isaac Horowitz. I know who you are, Mr. Grey, but how do you know me?"

"I'll explain that," I assured him. "I'd like to have a conversation with you. Would you join me in my car, which is parked right over there?" I pointed to my car, where Taylor was standing watching us. When the kid saw him, he looked a little frightened.

"That man is my driver," I told him, I hoped reassuringly. "I promise you that neither of us means you any harm. I just want to talk with you, that's all."

Curiosity got the best of him, and he followed me to my car. Once we were seated in the privacy of the backseat of my car, he asked me, "What in the world could the famous Christian Grey want to talk about with a nobody high school student like me?"

I took out a copy of my standard NDA, except that I had also already signed this one. "Before we talk, would you please sign this paper. As you can see, my signature is already there. It means that neither of us can repeat anything the other one says. This conversation is confidential. If you break this agreement, I can and will bring legal action against you. And I can assure you, I will not breach it, so you can feel safe to tell me anything."

The kid looked even more frightened and confused. "Do you think I have information you need or something?"

"I know you do," I answered. "But relax," I added. "You aren't in any trouble."

He skimmed the NDR before he took the pen I offered him and signed it. Once that was done, he looked up and asked, "What do you want to know, Mr. Grey?"

I cut to the chase. "Do you know a woman named Elena Lincoln?"

He flinched when he heard her name, but then he looked me in the eye and lied. "No, sir. I've never heard of her."

I decided that I needed to use my Dom voice. "Really? Why did you flinch when you heard her name?" I asked him.

He looked terrified, but he tried to cover for himself. "Wait... Isn't she a business partner or something of yours?"

I huffed. "She's a whole hell of a lot more than that," I answered. "When I was fifteen years old, she took me under her wing, so to speak, and became my Domme. I was her submissive until I was around twenty years old."

The kid looked shellshocked. "No, that's impossible," he argued.

"Why do you think so?" I asked. "Did she convince you that you were the only one?"

Tears began to form in his frightened eyes. "How do you know that?" he asked.

"She told me about you," I answered. "But she failed to mention how young you are. I was under the impression that you were in your twenties."

It was his turn to huff. "Yeah, I bet she did," he said bitterly.

"Are you still under contract with her?" I asked him bluntly.

"No, sir," he answered. "But I was until this weekend. She ended it and didn't give me a reason why. She told me I'm not allowed to contact her any more."

"I'm sure she's trying to cover her ass," I told him. "You might not feel like it right now, but you're actually lucky she ended it when she did. The further she is from you, the better off you are. She's a leach, and she'll suck you dry if you let her."

He couldn't stop the tears from falling. "You don't understand, Mr. Grey. I'm indebted to her. She saved me. I was a drug addict. I was headed towards juvie, and she taught me discipline."

"I understand better than you may realize," I answered. "I was an out of control teenager too, and when she got me under her control, my behavior improved. But she left me empty. She even loaned me the money to start my company, but in doing that, she isolated me from my family. She wanted to keep controlling me, even after we ended our contract. Trust me, Mr. Horowitz, you're better off with her out of your life."

"Will you please stop calling me that," he snapped. He took a deep breath before he tried to explain calmly. "I'm sorry sir, but Mr. Horowitz is my father, and he's a hateful son of a bitch. Please, call me Isaac."

"Very well, but only if you agree to call me Christian," I replied.

"OK, Christian," he responded. "So... what do you want from me?"

I paused before I answered, "First, you need to understand that the woman you thought you knew is far from who she really is. She's kept a lot from you. Did you know, for example, that she owns a BDSM club?"

"No," he mumbled. "I had no idea."

"There's a lot of shit she kept from you, and she kept you hidden from everyone else to save her own ass. She knew she was breaking the law with you, just as she was with me and with all the others."

I couldn't miss the look of betrayal in his eyes. "How many others?" he asked.

"I have no idea, but you now know that you weren't her only sub by my own admission. But we certainly weren't the only ones. She's had others, but I'm still working on finding out about them. One of them even brought charges against her... or his parents did anyway, when he was fourteen years old. She most likely paid them off."

"Fuck!" he cried out. The look of anguish on his face made my heart hurt. The heart that I didn't realize I even had until a few days ago. It was so easy to empathize with this kid, because he was me just a few years ago.

"Look, I know how you feel," I told him. "I thought when I was your age that I was the only kid she'd ever had. She was a family friend, and my siblings and I grew up with both her and her ex-husband. I found out this past weekend that when my brother was fourteen or fifteen, she propositioned him. He turned her down, thank God. But my point is that she's a child predator. Even a week ago, I wouldn't have believed that. But now I know better."

I watched the cocktail of emotions on his face as the anguish turned to anger and then to resolve. "What do you want from me, Christian?" he finally asked.

I cut to the chase again, the same way I had when we started this conversation. "I want you to press charges against her. I will cover all of your legal fees, and I can also provide protection for you if you are afraid of retaliation."

The look of resolve on his face grew to resignation. "I'll do it," he said. "In fact, I'll do it right fucking now. To hell with school. It's not like I'd be able to focus on anything if I went now anyway. I was headed to the library to pick up a couple of books I'd reserved online for a research project, and then I was headed to school from there. But fuck school. It's not like I haven't had perfect attendance for the past two years. I can afford to miss one day. I'm going to go to the police station instead."

"Go get your books," I told him. "In the meantime, I'll call one of my lawyers. Actually, if it's OK with you, I'd like it to be my dad. I think he'd appreciate the chance to represent you. In fact, I can drop you off at his office, if that's OK with you."

"OK," he answered, "but why do you think he'll be so eager to represent me?"

I explained, "Because you'll remind him of me. It's too late for him to represent me, but he can make up for it with you. It will do him good."

"Why's it too late for you?" he asked innocently.

"I'm too old. There's a statute of limitations for statutory rape."

"Oh," he responded, and he seemed to be deep in thought after that.

"So," I asked, "can I give you a ride to the library so you can get your books, and then to my dad's office? You should talk with him before you talk to the police."

He nodded but didn't speak. I could see that he was still deep in thought. The library was just around the corner, and while he went in to get his books, I called Dad.

Dad answered by saying, "Christian, any word on Lincoln?"

"I'm fine, Dad, and how are you this morning?" I answered cheekily.

He chucked. "Is this my son, Christian Grey? Making small talk?"

"Yeah, I know, Dad. Don't get used to it. I actually need your help, if you're free this morning, or if you can clear your schedule."

"What's up, son," he asked.

"I'd like to bring a young man to your office so he can talk to you. And then if you can, I'd like you to accompany him to the police station to give his statement. He is ready to bring charges against Elena Lincoln. He's seventeen, Dad, and she only ended her contract with him this weekend."

I heard Dad blow out a breath of air over the phone. "Consider my schedule cleared. I'll be waiting for you."

"Thanks, Dad," I said.

When we hung up, I called Anastasia. She answered after only the first ring. "Christian," she said, and I could hear her smile.

"Hey, baby. I got him. He's going to press charges. I'm taking him to talk to Dad, and Dad's going to go with him to the police."

"That's great!" she responded.

"Yep," I answered. "So I'm headed to GEH after I drop him off at Dad's office. If your paperwork is complete, I'll see you not long after that."

"Sounds good," she responded. "On my end, I've got our PR teams working on our press statement. Do you want to have a press conference this afternoon?"

"Is that what you want?" I asked her.

"It's what both of our teams are recommending, and I think it's a good idea. If nothing else, we can put to rest the rumors that our companies are merging."

"Or that you're pregnant," I added.

She groaned. "That too. I swear, why do people always go there?"

"Adds to the drama," I answered her as Horowitz opened the car door and got in. He put the books he'd picked up into his backpack, which he'd left in the car. Taylor started driving towards Dad's office as I continued my conversation with Ana.

"OK, baby," I told her, "if you think we should do it, then let's do it. Do you have a time frame in mind?"

"I have a window between three and four," she answered.

I didn't have any idea what my schedule was. "Do me a favor, Anastasia. Can you get Hannah to check with Andrea to see if that works for me? If it does, I can put off coming to Ismintis until closer to that time, and we can do the press conference there."

"That works," she answered. "Thanks, Christian. I should really get back to my meeting now."

"You're in a meeting?" I asked.

"I am. I'm sitting in a conference room at the moment with eight of my most valued employees, and everybody here is staring at me with astonished looks on their faces wondering why I'm smiling like a teenager."

"Awe, baby, you didn't have to stop your meeting for me," I told her.

"Yes, I did, Christian. I promised you," she answered. "But I need to get back to them now, so I'll see you soon. I love you."

"I love you, too, princess," I responded, and we ended the call. I was in awe of my girl, at how she had just expressed her love to me without hesitation even while her employees were sitting there listening to her every word.

"Girlfriend?" the Horowitz kid asked, breaking my train of thought.

"Yep," I answered, smiling at the thought of announcing that news to the world.

He sighed and mumbled, "So there's hope for me too then."

I turned towards him and gave him my full attention. "You have your whole life ahead of you. I know it seems really fucked up right now. Trust me, I know what that's like. But yes, there is hope. So much hope."


	24. Chapter 24: Press Conference (APOV)

**Chapter 24: Press Conference** _(Anastasia's POV)_

"I should really get back to my meeting now." I told Christian. I didn't really want to end our call, but I felt guilty keeping my staff waiting as I chatted with my boyfriend. Besides, they were all there waiting for instructions from me, and none of them had ever seen me behave this way at work before.

"You're in a meeting?" Christian asked.

"I am. I'm sitting in a conference room at the moment with eight of my most valued employees, and everybody here is staring at me with astonished looks on their faces wondering why I'm smiling like a school girl." Actually, two of them were smiling knowingly at me, three others looked shocked because they'd never seen me this relaxed before, and the other three were busy with their phones or iPads.

"Awe, baby, you didn't have to stop your meeting for me," Christian said.

I wanted to roll me eyes at him, since my failure to take his calls the previous day was one of the reasons he had been so hurt and angry with me, and because I had made him a promise just this morning. I responded, "Yes, I did, Christian. I promised you. But I need to get back to them now, so I'll see you soon. I love you."

When I hung up the phone, I couldn't wipe the smile off my face. I decided not to even try. Instead I looked at each of them as I told them, "Just in case you haven't figured it out already, that was my boyfriend. Christian Grey. We're going to hold a press conference this afternoon to announce it, so please keep a lid on it for now. If it gets leaked before then, I'll know it was one of you." They could see from the smirk on my face that it wasn't a real threat.

"You're dating Christian Grey?" Roger, the head of finance, asked, looking even more dumbfounded than he had when I was on the phone.

"The Christian Grey? The CEO of GEH?" Sylvia, my HR manager asked. She looked just as shocked as Roger.

"Yes," I confessed. "And before you ask, no, our companies are not merging. The only thing we need to concern ourselves with is operating without a COO until I find a replacement. There may be times when I need to take a call from Christian, but other than that, my personal life won't affect anything at Ismintis.

I managed to get us back on focus, and we spent the next hour and a half reallocating Hyde's job duties for the next few months, until a replacement could be put in place. After that meeting ended, I only had about an hour to meet with Hannah to review my schedule for the rest of the day, catch up on emails, and prepare for the lunch meeting with Hyde's former assistant and a couple of other members of my inner circle. I wanted their feedback before I started the search for a new COO.

Actually, I had even less time to prepare for that meeting than I'd anticipated because I spent more time than needed emailing back and forth with Christian. It all started with an email he'd sent me after we talked.

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 10:04 a.m.

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Paperwork and press conference with my hot girlfriend

Dear Ana,

Andrea has informed me that the press conference has been scheduled for 3:30 this afternoon at Ismintis. I take it that your PR people are setting it up?

You mentioned that you had a window in your calendar from 3 to 4 p.m., so I plan to arrive at your office at 3 p.m. I'm sure we can find some interesting ways to occupy our time until the press conference. My next meeting is at 5:00, and GEH is only ten minutes away, so I expect to have some time to de-brief with you after the press conference. And yes, the hyphen was intentional.

Attached, you will find the contract turning over ownership of Esclava Salons to you, effective immediately. I have put it all in your name, Anastasia, not in the name of your company, Ismintis International. If you would prefer to have it in the name of your company instead, just let me know and I will change it. Otherwise, I will bring a hard copy with me today for you to sign.

In addition, Ros has already sent you the spreadsheets outlining the financial status of McPherson Communications and Sunset Media. However, she did not yet send you that information for SIP, so I am attaching it here. I have also reviewed the contract that you had with SIP and agree to all of the terms, so I will be prepared to sign it this afternoon, turning over ownership of SIP to Ismintis by the end of the month.

I'm counting the minutes until I get to announce to the world that you are mine. Just out of curiosity, are you still feeling as frisky as you were this morning, kitten? I'd like to test a theory I have which involves you both meowing and purring. On a related note, is your office soundproof?

Utterly and completely yours,

Christian Grey

CEO of GEH and hungry boyfriend

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 11:01 a.m.

From: Anastasia Steele

To: Christian Grey

Subject: Paperwork and press conference with my hot and hungry boyfriend

Dear Christian,

First of all, if you're already feeling hungry, you should send Andrea out to pick up a sandwich. I sincerely hope you aren't suffering too much. Then again, I may be feeling a few hunger pangs myself, and nothing I eat for lunch will satisfy the craving I have. Incidentally, my 4:00 meeting cancelled on me, so I am free until 4:30 now. This should give us ample time to de-brief. I do insist, however, on you returning mine this time. I refuse to go commando in my own office. I may be inclined to hold on to yours instead. Perhaps I should start a collection like you have.

In other business, regarding Esclava Salons, what kind of name is that anyway? Who names a beauty salon "slave"? I don't want to even consider the history or the mental processes of the pedo-bitch as she made that decision. The first thing I want to do is change the name to "Ismintis Beauty," because I want the name to be associated with my company. With that in mind, I would prefer that you put it in the name of my company instead of me personally. It will make the transition smoother as I want it to be a subsidiary of my company. I am also willing to purchase it fair and square instead of receiving it as a gift. However, I understand your reasons for gifting it, and I am supportive either way.

Everything looks good concerning SIP. I have not had a chance yet to look at the financials for McPherson or Sunset. I might have time before I see you today if I don't have too many interruptions. At any rate, I will let you know by Friday.

I also am looking forward to announcing to the world that you are mine. Please keep in mind that I intend to keep my public image the same, minus the glasses, which I gave up as soon as you asked me to. Therefore, there will be absolutely no animal sounds coming from me during the press conference. What happens after that, once we're alone behind closed doors... Well, let's just say that I liked it when you called me kitten. I have, as you know, made it a habit throughout my career of testing your theories, with a great deal of success, so I am eager, yes, very eager, to test this one. Please keep in mind that my office is, unfortunately, not sound proof. It seems logical that purring would make much less noise than meowing, but I believe I am capable of meowing softly, given the right stimulus.

I am now counting down the hours until 3 p.m.

Anastasia Steele

CEO of Ismintis International and horny and frisky sex kitten

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 11:24 a.m.

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Soundproof offices and eviction notices

Dear Ana,

Elliott can take care of soundproofing your office if that is something you are interested in. He did mine, and it only took him a couple of days. However, in the meantime, I look forward to testing your ability to keep the noise level down. I don't expect to walk away without a few scratches, since you are such a horny and frisky little kitten.

Trust me when I say that nothing Andrea picks up for me could come even close to sating the hunger I am feeling right now. I have a particular taste in mind, and nothing else will do. I hope that you are still as wet at 3 p.m. as I imagine you are right now, after writing what you just wrote. I am very confident that you will enjoy what I have in mind. I cannot make any guarantees about your panties, though; they might not make it out of the experience in one piece. Are you touching yourself now, kitten? Remember, your orgasms belong to me. Don't do anything that could get you punished. Unless of course you want it.

I have taken care of the changes you requested for Esclava Salons, and I will bring the updated paperwork with me this afternoon. Before I see you, I intend to stop by her salon and give a copy personally to the pedo-bitch herself. I want to see the look on her botoxed face. Would you like me to give her a message for you? Eviction notice? Please keep in mind that you should never contact her without your security detail. And I would prefer to know about it beforehand as well.

Getting hungrier by the minute,

Christian Grey

CEO of GEH and ravenous wolf ready to devour a certain kitten

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 11:46 a.m.

From: Anastasia Steele

To: Christian Grey

Subject: Re: Soundproof offices and eviction notices

Dear ravenous wolf,

Your kitten eagerly awaits you, but has a lunch meeting coming up in a few minutes which requires her, unfortunately, to cut this banter short.

No, I was not touching myself. I have not made it a habit to masturbate at work, no matter how provocative my reading material may be. I do have an image to maintain. Which is another reason that I will pass your test. Give it your best shot. I can be quiet. Can you?

Yes, please give the filthy cunt the message that she will be evicted at the end of the week, once ownership passes over to me. That is all I need to say to her. I will need to do some research regarding her employees. I hope that someone will emerge as an effective manager, to replace her. Do you know enough about the inner workings of the salons to make any recommendations?

And now, my hungry wolf, your kitten must prepare for the meeting that starts in just a few minutes. By the way, the masturbation thing goes both ways, doesn't it? It's only fair, don't you think, that your orgasms also belong to me?

Getting friskier and hornier,

Anastasia Steele

CEO of Ismintis International and silent as a church mouse when I need to be

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 11:54 a.m.

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasia Steele

Subject: Church mice

Dear friskier and hornier,

Oh, kitten, is that a challenge? Be very careful, my sweet princess. I NEVER back down from a challenge. And yes, I most definitely can be quiet. I look forward to watching you try. How about a wager? Your assistant sits right outside your office. If she hears you, I win. If not, you win. Whoever wins gets to be on top the next time we play.

I will give your message to the filthy cunt, and I will think about your question regarding new management.

Yes, my orgasms also belong to you. I don't have a habit of jacking off at work either, but I've never needed to as badly as I do right now. I think we are in agreement that 3:00 cannot come quickly enough. Once it does, you are going to be coming more quickly than you ever imagined possible.

Christian Grey,

Hard as nails CEO of GEH

* * *

He would have to have the last word, wouldn't he? No way. No fucking way was I going to let that happen. Christian wasn't the only one who NEVER backed down from a challenge, and there's no way I could leave it at that. Even if it made me late, I had to respond.

* * *

Date: October 19, 2016 Time: 11:55 a.m.

From: Anastasia Steele

To: Christian Grey

Subject: Your wager

Dear hard as nails,

You're on. But who wins if Hannah hears you?

Anastasia Steele,

CEO of Ismintis, International, who also NEVER backs down from a challenge.

* * *

I didn't have time to wait for Christian's response because I had to get to my meeting. As I walked down to the conference room where we were having our lunch meeting, I wondered to myself how we were going to honestly judge our little contest. Even if Hannah overheard me or Christian making sex noises, she would be too discrete to admit it. Perhaps that was to my advantage, but I wanted an honest win.

For the next hour and a half, I had to put Christian and our challenge out of my mind so I could focus on my meeting with Hyde's former assistant and two other members of my executive team. I wanted their feedback on how Hyde had done his job. I was gathering data to use in making a decision about a new COO. This time, I didn't want to advertise the job, as I had when I'd hired Hyde. This time, I wanted to head hunt. I had a couple of people in mind already, and one of them was already based here in Seattle, at Google. But I valued the opinions of my staff and wanted them to contribute to the process as much as possible.

After my lunch meeting, I only had a few minutes to prepare for a meeting with Cecil Whiteside, the founder and CEO of Whiteside Publishing, a small independent publishing house that I had begun talks with after I lost SIP to GEH. Had I known that I would be getting SIP from Christian, I wouldn't have approached Whiteside. However, now that it was done, I was still interested. I planned to merge the two publishing houses and change the name to Ismintis Publishing. Together, the two could become a powerhouse, and I was determined to make that happen. I couldn't imagine a greater tribute to my mother than that.

I was pleasantly surprised when Mr. Whiteside and I reached an agreement in under and hour, and he left seeming to be happy about being able to retire with a good nest egg. I knew the price I'd agreed to was a little bit higher than the publishing house's current worth, but I was so confident about how much more profitable it was going to become in the next few months, I was willing to pay it. I was still getting a great deal; otherwise, I wouldn't have considered it. I spent about twenty minutes typing up the terms of the contract that we had agreed to and sending it off to legal.

2:15 p.m. Christian would be here in forty-five minutes. Unless he was early, and then it could be any time between now and then. I knew he wouldn't be late. I needed to occupy my time with something to get my mind off how horny I felt sitting there waiting for Christian I decided to open up the spreadsheet for McPherson Communications and start looking it over as I waited. Maybe I would be able to make a decision before Christian arrived. As I began to look at the numbers, I wondered if I had the correct spreadsheet. I double checked it. Yes, it was correct. But could these numbers be for real? Holy crap! How the hell had he managed this? The bottom line had gone from being in the red to being more than 80% increase in profits in only two months. I had never seen such a quick turnaround of that magnitude. It appeared that he had worked some type of miracle. How could I take it from him now, after the amazing difference he had made? It would just be wrong, morally.

2:30 p.m. I needed to use the restroom, and as I did, I thought about what Christian had written about de-briefing. Would other people have found that as funny as I did? But he had also warned me that he was probably going to destroy my panties, and I was wearing one of my favorite pairs. No, I wasn't going to let him destroy or steal this pair. As I finished using the toilet, I removed my panties and put them in a drawer in the vanity. I took time to touch up my lipstick and check my hair. I considered taking it down. There was no doubt in my mind what Christian and I were going to do when he got here, so my hair would have to be repaired before the press conference anyway. With that thought in mind, I removed the clip that held my bun in place and ran my fingers through the waves. Yes, Christian would like this.

When I walked back into my office, I headed back to my desk, but I was stopped in my tracks by the Greek god already seated there, staring back at me. Holy fuck, he looked hot. "Christian!" I greeted him excitedly. "You're early!"

"Mmm hmm," he said, eyeing me hungrily. "It didn't take as long as I expected it might with the pedo-bitch. And traffic was a lot clearer than usual for some reason. Is this OK?"

"OK? Of course! Why wouldn't it be?"

As he spoke, his eyes travelled up and down my body. "It occurred to me after I sat down at your desk that you might not like the idea of the CEO of a competing company sitting behind your desk. I can assure you that I haven't looked at anything on your desk or your computer. I started to get up, but you came out before I had a chance."

I sat on his lap and straddled him. Before I responded, I gave him a lingering kiss. "I've told you before, and I'll tell you again. I trust you. I'm glad you were here to greet me. I've been waiting for you." With that said, I kissed him again, and it quickly grew more passionate. Before I even realized it, my skirt was around my waist, and Christian's fingers were teasing my entrance.

"No panties, kitten?" he asked. "I approve. But I thought you said you never went commando at work."

I was out of breath from the kiss, but I answered anyway. "I took them off just before you got here. I didn't want to lose..."

Before I could finish my sentence, Christian's lips were on mine again. This time, he rubbed my clit before pushing two fingers inside me. I started riding his hand when he began to pump in and out. But then he stopped abruptly, pushed me off his lap, and smiled wickedly at me.

"What? Why did you do that?" I asked.

"Just making sure you're ready," he teased. "If you are, then sit on your desk and lie back."

I obeyed him without hesitation as I answered him snarkily, "Your hands were just in my pussy, so you know exactly how ready I am."

He ignored my comment as he ordered me, "Put both feet flat on the desk, and then spread your legs. Show me what's mine."

When I obeyed him, he wasted no time. He began to devour me as he used his hands to push my legs further apart. He paused only long enough to say, "Let me hear you meow, kitten. Then I'll let you come."

I let out a sound that sounded an awful lot like a baby kitten, but I was careful to keep it low enough that no one outside my door would be able to hear me. Christian responded by sucking my clit into his mouth, inserting a finger inside me, and finding my g-spot immediately. Within seconds, I felt the waves of the orgasm coming over me. Christian continued to fuck me with his tongue through the orgasm, and I let out a few more kitten sounds. He kept it up until I had gotten through a second orgasm.

When Christian raised his head, he glanced at his watch. "2:47," he said. "And two orgasms down. We still have almost thirty minutes before we need to meet our PR teams. I know you've got at least one more in there, kitten. And I want one too."

I raised up on my elbows but didn't get up from my desk. "You want a blowjob?" I offered him.

He chuckled. "Maybe later, princess. Right now, I want to fuck you. I want to come in your pussy. Unbutton your blouse."

As I obeyed him, he took off his pants and boxers. He looked strange, still wearing his shirt and tie. Once my blouse was unbuttoned to his satisfaction, he said, "Now pull down your bra so I can look at your tits as I fuck you. And reach up and hold on to the corner of your desk. This is going to be fast and rough."

His mouth was on my nipple instantly, and a second later, his cock was inside me. I held on to the desk as he pumped me vigorously. As I grew closer to a third climax, I began to let out little meows, just for him. It took almost no time at all for both of us to reach our climax at the same time. When Christian stiffened, and I knew he was emptying himself inside me, I let go of the desk and held tightly to him. I lifted my feet from the desk and wrapped my legs tightly around him.

"I love you," I told him.

"I love you, too, princess. I love you so fucking much," he responded.

We lay there like that for a minute or two without speaking, just wrapped up in each other. But then Christian lifted his head and glanced at his watch again. "2:52. That was quite literally a five-minute fuck. We need to clean up and get ready to meet our PR teams."

"Yes, we do," I agreed. He helped me off my desk, and we both went into my ensuite bathroom. I turned on the shower so it could get hot while I took off what remained of my clothes. Christian took off his tie and shirt in record time.

In the shower, Christian almost made me come again just with his hands and bath wash. I would have made him come with the hand job I gave him if there had been time. I did succeed in making him hard again. But we both were in a hurry, so we didn't let ourselves go as far as we wanted to.

By 3:10, we were both fully dressed, my make-up was touched up, and my hair was back in place in my signature bun. I even had managed to put my panties back on.

Christian took my hand as we walked out of my office. As we passed Hannah, he turned to her and asked, "Hannah, I was wondering. Did you happen to hear anything unusual coming from Ana's office just a few minutes ago?"

Hannah looked at Christian blankly, and then at me questioningly. We could both see from the look on her face that she didn't have any idea what Christian was referring to. She obviously hadn't heard us. But I could feel myself blushing, and when Hannah noticed, she also looked embarrassed. "Umm, no sir, I didn't hear anything at all."

"Thank you, Hannah," Christian replied as we moved towards the elevator. Once we were on the elevator, and no one could overhear or see us, he pressed me up against the wall, kissed me firmly, and then said, "Congratulations, kitten. You win round one."

After I caught my breath, I asked, "How do you know Hannah was telling the truth?"

He looked at me incredulously. "Seriously? The same way you do, princess. Between the two of us, there probably isn't any person better in the entire country at reading people. You read her just as clearly as I did. She didn't hear you. That really pleases me, even if it does mean that I lost the wager. But this was a win-win anyway. I can hardly wait to take you... no, to be taken by you into the playroom. I look forward to pleasing you, my Goddess."

I didn't have a chance to respond to Christian as the elevator door opened to the first floor and we stepped out. I had arranged for the press conference to be held in a large seminar room near the entrance, and our PR teams were already gathered in a conference room next door. Before we went through the door, I whispered to Christian, "I look forward to it too. Now, can you please stop making me blush like a school girl in front of my employees?"

He chuckled. "No promises. Some things are just too easy."

I rolled my eyes at him, ignoring his growl, and opened the door. Curtis, one of my PR team members was the first voice I heard. "Oh, great! Here they are!"

"Most of the reporters are already here, but they're still getting set up in the conference room," Robin, my Media Relations Manager, reported.

"Well, they're going to get their story. I'm sure they're happy about that," I commented dryly.

"You look good," Curtis told me. "Great color," he said, referring to my plum colored business suit. Christian growled again when Curtis appeared to be looking at my boobs. I didn't think it was the appropriate time to explain to Christian that Curtis was gay, so I ignored his growl again.

Christian spoke to a member of his team and asked for our statement. He handed each of us a copy.

"Thank you, Travis," I told him. He looked surprised that I remembered his name from last Friday.

I glanced around the room at our teams. In addition to Curtis and Robin, there were three other people there for me. Christian had four people, including Travis.

"Did you fire Britney Harris?" I asked him, just out of curiosity.

"Yep," he answered.

"You know my people won't repeat anything she said, right?"

He snorted, "I should hope not, seeing as how she didn't know what the hell she was talking about. She made it sound like GEH is having trouble with declining profits in general. Nothing could be further from the truth. She was referring to a specific project that she didn't know shit about."

"Sir, can we please focus on the statement to the press?" Travis asked him. Only a slight tremor in his voice gave away his fear of approaching Christian and interrupting his conversation with me.

"Sure," Christian replied, making Travis relax. We both took a couple of minutes to read through the statement. It was really straightforward. Both of us would speak. Christian would begin by announcing that we were in a new relationship. I would affirm his words and then explain that everything with our companies would continue like usual. Then we would take questions.

Christian and I had both made similar statements to the press, but never about anything so personal. Nevertheless, we got through the statement and interview without a hitch. I kept fearing that a paparazzi would ask a question about BDSM or something related to Christian's videos, but it didn't happen. Clearly, Hyde had not released them yet, but I wondered how long it would be before he did, and what it would do to our public image when that happened. I wondered if we needed to warn our PR teams so they could prepare for it, but I didn't want to share that information with anyone.

Christian and I posed for a few pictures after the interview ended, and then we met with our PR teams again to debrief with them before heading back up to my office. In the elevator, Christian said, "You looked so radiant standing there in front of all those cameras. I'm so glad I get to show you off now. We should go out tonight to celebrate."

I smiled. "What do you have in mind, Mr. Grey?" I asked him.

He smiled back at me. "Nothing extraordinary, Ms. Steele. Let's go to the Mile High Club, have dinner and a drink or two, and then go back to my place... or yours. I don't mind where I sleep tonight, as long as it's with you."

When we got off the elevator on my floor and made our way back to my office, Hannah stopped me. "Wei Zhang can't make it to the meeting at 4:30. His wife went into labor this afternoon."

"Shit," I responded. "I was hoping I could meet with him before that happened, so he could work from home without having to come in at all." I paused a moment and then directed Hannah, "Can you find out if it's a boy or girl, and then send an appropriate gift tomorrow. Also, reschedule a meeting with him at his convenience. I need to get him briefed on the Lloyd-Abram deal as soon as possible."

Once we were back in my office, Christian took me in his arms and said, "I love watching you work, princess. You're so good at it."

"I learned from the best," I responded before I kissed him. Then I told him, "I need to find a good nickname for you."

"Why?" he asked. "What's wrong with just calling me Christian? Unless of course, we're in the playroom and you're calling me 'Master.'"

I smirked at him. "The next time we go in the playroom, I won't be calling you Master. Or have you forgotten already?"

His smirk mirrored mine. "Oh believe me, my radiant Goddess, I haven't forgotten."

"See, that's just it," I began to explain. "You have all these adorable nicknames for me. When you're on top, I'm 'princess,' and today, I was 'kitten.' I like both of those. A lot. When I'm on top, you're going to call me 'Goddess' instead of 'Mistress,' and as ridiculous as it sounds, I like it too. When you're on top, I call you 'Master,' but that's only if we're in the playroom, only if I'm collared. What about today? You were on top, and I enjoyed obeying you, but I wasn't collared."

"Today was vanilla," Christian said. "You shouldn't call me 'Master' unless we're doing the Dom/sub thing."

"Right, so what should I call you?" I asked.

"Umm... Christian? It is my name, after all."

"I just wanted something a little more... special. For those special moments."

"Umm... Zeus? Apollo?" His face looked serious, but I knew he was trying to be funny.

I laughed hysterically. "Ironically, the first thing I thought when I saw you sitting at my desk earlier is how much you look like a Greek god. So either of those would be more appropriate than you think. But no..."

"Well, I'm not sure what to tell you, princess," Christian replied.

"See! Even in this conversation, you can call me that, and I love it. It makes me feel cherished every time you say it. I want a name like that to call you. I need it especially for when we go in the playroom next. What does a Domme usually call her sub?"

"Anything she wants to. What do you want to call me? What name comes to your mind when you think of me as your sub?"

"Holy shit," I responded. "You're actually going to be my sub, aren't you."

"Are you really only just now realizing it?" he asked. "You did say..."

"Yes," I cut him off. "How about 'precious'?" I asked.

"Depends," he answered. "Are you going to make your voice sound like Gollum in Lord of the Rings?"

"Shit!" I responded.

"I take it that means no?" Christian quipped.

I ignored his snarkiness. "I called you 'sweetheart,' when I was pretending to be your Domme with the pedo-bitch. Did that work?"

"It worked beautifully," he answered.

"Did you feel cherished?" I continued to press him.

"Yeah. I mean, my mom, Grace, used to call me that. She still does sometimes..."

"Well, hell, I can't call you something your mom calls you. Not when we're having sex."

"Ana, princess, honestly, I don't see what the big deal is. I'm not really a big fan of nicknames anyway. Hell, my birth mother used to call me 'maggot.' I still remember that. She used it like a term of endearment, and I didn't know what it meant."

I stared at him for a moment, not knowing how to respond to that. I felt tears coming to my eyes, but I willed myself not to cry because he would only interpret it as pity, and I knew he didn't want that. Finally, I cleared my throat and said, "I'm your princess. You're my sunshine. I'm your kitten. You're my tiger. I'm your Goddess. You're my Master. I think that sums it up."

He smirked. "Do I light up your life?" he asked.

"More than you realize, apparently," I answered. "Would you like me to sing it to you, sunshine?"

He laughed out loud. "Yes, actually, I would. Can you sound like Debby Boone?"

"I'm surprised you even know who that is," I remarked. "How old are you again?"

"Pretty sure we're the same age, princess. How do you know who she is?"

"My grandmother was a huge fan," I explained. I used to listen to that song all the time when I was a little girl.

"Well, I guess it's a better choice than 'You are my Sunshine," Christian joked.

"I can sing that too," I offered.

"Let's have it then, princess," he said with a serious look on his face. "I'm waiting."

I giggled, and then I started singing, "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away."

Christian smiled like a little boy on Christmas morning. "That was probably the most adorable thing I've ever heard."

"It was cheesy as hell, not to mention off key," I commented dryly.

"Adorable," he insisted.

"OK, then," I responded, and then I changed the subject. "Anyway, I want to hear about your meeting with the bitch troll."

"Right," he remembered. "It took all of five minutes, but they were well worth it. I wish you could have seen the look on her face. Pure shock. She didn't believe I'd really do it. I gave her your message. I won't repeat her response, but you can imagine." Christian's face quickly grew serious, and then worried."

"What?" I asked. "What's that look for?"

"Ana, I think you need to increase your personal security until this is over. I think you need to get one of your other officers to tag along with Sawyer when you go out. Maybe that tall African American woman... what was her name?"

"Prescott?" I asked. "When did you see her?"

"Taylor reports to me on everything concerning your security," he answered cryptically.

I considered his words for a moment, deciphering what he wasn't saying. "Christian, I'm not surprised that the pedo-bitch threatened me. I don't think you need to be so worried about it. You and I both receive threats almost on a daily basis, right?"

"Yes, Ana, but this is different." He ran his fingers through his hair as he continued, "You don't know her like I do. I believe that she seriously intends to do something to harm you."

"OK, if it makes you feel better, I'll have Prescott added to my daily security detail beginning tomorrow. We can do that for a week and then reevaluate. Does that make you feel better?"

"Yes," he answered. "But I'd feel even better if I had my own guy watching you too."

"No," I answered him. "Absolutely not."

He ran his fingers through his hair before he sighed and then smiled in concession, but it looked more like a grimace. "Well, it was worth a try."

I sighed too, in relief. "Thank you for not fighting me on that," I told him.

There was no question now that it was a grimace. "I'm trying Ana. The truth is that I'm used to getting my way in everything, but I knew as soon as I found out who you were that it would have to be different with you."

"Because I'm also used to getting what I want," I added. "And we both can't have that all the time."

"I just want you to be safe," he said.

"I'll have Sawyer and Prescott with me all the time, beginning tomorrow. I'll even make sure she follows me into the ladies' room. I will be safe," I assured him.

"How's your security at Ismintis?" he asked, hardly acknowledging my assurance.

"Top of the line," I answered. "Just as good as what you have at GEH, if not better."

Christian sighed again. "OK, I give up." He glanced at his watch. "So your meeting at 4:30 got cancelled, but do you have anything else on your calendar?" he asked.

"No, that was my last meeting today. But I would like to finish looking at the spreadsheets Ros sent me yesterday. I was looking at McPhearson just before you arrived this afternoon. I have to tell you, I'm shocked. I've never seen a turnaround like that. How the hell did you do it?"

He smirked at me. "Tell me this. If I hadn't 'stolen' it from you, what's the first thing you would have done?"

"I would have gotten rid of Larry Oldenburg," I replied without hesitation.

"Yes, and then what?" he pressed.

This time I had to think for a moment. "Shuffled things around a bit. Consolidated a few of the departments. Cleaned house. There was a toxic environment under Oldenburg, and a few of the other managers contributed to the problem. Once they were gone, then I would have awarded the top employees to improve their morale. Then set some goals and created incentives for them to reach them."

As I had been speaking, Christian listened and nodded. When I stopped, he smirked at me again and said, "You have pretty much outlined step by step what I did. I think beyond that, it was just luck. The aligning of the stars. I've never had an increase like this either."

"OK, that settles it for me," I said. "You were meant to have it. You should keep it."

"Anastasia, if you'd gotten it, you would have done the same things I did and seen the same return. If you want it, it's yours. I already know what you offered Oldenburg. I've already committed to selling it to you for the same amount."

"It's worth probably twice that much at this point," I said.

"Not quite, but not far off," he conceded. "Take until Friday to be sure. I won't take what you just told me as your final decision. You are free to change your mind."

"You almost sound like you don't want it," I told him.

"No, that's not it," he responded. "It's just that... I feel guilty about what happened. I should have known what was happening in my own damn company."

"Hey, it was my own COO that was double crossing me," I reminded him. "You weren't responsible. Let it go."

He sighed again. He'd been doing a lot of that since we returned to my office from the press conference. But then he seemed to snap out of it. He got that hungry look in his eyes again and said, "I only have about twenty minutes before I need to leave, and we still haven't debriefed."

"Debriefed?" I questioned. Then I remembered his email from earlier, and I blushed. "Didn't we do that before the press conference?"

"My dear Anastasia," he said seductively, "you are one of the most successful business leaders in the country. Surely you know that you can't debrief a meeting until after the meeting is over."

My face was burning in embarrassment, but I shook it off and smiled at him. "OK then. Which one of us should go first?"

"Well, I suppose I could," he responded. His voice became even more seductive as he added, "I seem to recall a certain offer you made earlier."

"Offer?" I asked innocently. I knew exactly what he was referring to.

"Mmm hmm," he answered. Just the sound of his voice was making me wet. "Shall I refresh your memory? I believe your exact words were 'You want a blowjob?' Yes, kitten. Yes, I do. And I still want to make you purr too."

"OK, tiger," I responded. "Let's get you out of those Armanis." I moved to kneel in front of him, but he remained seated. He played with my nipples through my clothes as I undid his belt and then his pants. But that's as far as I could get without him standing up. "A little help would be good," I told him.

"Not yet," he responded. He leaned back in the chair and crossed his legs. "Stand up and take off your blouse. Slowly."

I kept my eyes locked with his as I stood to my feet, slowly unbuttoned my blouse, and slid it seductively off my shoulders. I placed it on my desk and then looked back at him.

"Now your bra. All the way off this time." At his command, I reached behind me and unsnapped my bra. I put it on my desk with my blouse. Christian reached out and began to tweak, pinch, and rub my nipples. "Now, take off your skirt," he ordered, and I obeyed as he continued to play with my nipples. I was now soaking wet. Christian stood up, still playing with my nipples. His pants fell as he stood. "Now you're ready," he said. He moved his hands from my breasts to my shoulders and gently pushed me down. I knelt before him, pulled down his boxers, and took his cock in my hand. After giving him a good squeeze, I licked the tip, causing him to suck in air.

"Do you like that, tiger?" I asked him.

"You know what I like, kitten," he answered. I responded by taking him all the way into my mouth. I knew exactly what to do to get him off quickly, and I didn't waste any time. Within a couple of minutes, he was jizzing down my throat, and I was swallowing it all.

Once I had licked him clean, he offered me his hands, and he helped me to my feet. He kissed my lips passionately before he looked me in my eyes again and said, "I want you to lean over your desk so I can take you from behind. If you were serious about not wanting to lose those panties, then I suggest you take them off right now."

I responded by taking off my panties and placing them on the desk with the rest of my clothes. Then I leaned over the desk and stuck my ass in the air. The next thing I knew, Christian had smacked it.

"Ouch! What was that for?" I asked him.

He didn't respond in words. Instead, I felt his lips on my ass cheeks, and then his tongue on my clit. But after a minute or two, he stood behind me and leaned over me. He reached around me and tweaked my nipples at the same time that he pushed inside me. And then he fucked me gloriously. In almost no time at all, I came. And then I came again. And then he came. Afterwards, he kept me pressed against my desk as he ran his fingers through my hair and began to scratch my scalp. It felt so good I closed my eyes and enjoyed it. I remembered what he'd said earlier, and I knew what he wanted me to do. Very softly, I did my best imitation of a cat purring. I kept my eyes closed, but I knew he was smiling.

He kept me there for as long as he probably could, before he had to leave to get back for his 5:00 meeting, and I continued to purr softly until he stopped scratching my scalp. With a slap to my ass, he helped me up off my desk for the second time today. Then he grabbed all our clothes and took them into the bathroom. I followed him, making sure that he didn't pocket my panties. We kissed again before he started getting dressed. I stood there watching him, memorizing every inch of his body. As he put on one article of clothing after another, he never took his eyes off my body.

"I've stayed as long as I can. Ros is going to kick my ass if I don't get back to GEH. I don't expect the meeting to last long, but it has to happen today."

We made plans to meet at the Mile High Club at 7 p.m. before he kissed me again and left me in my bathroom. I showered again, and before I left the office I caught up on a few emails. At around 5:30, I had Luke drive me home so I could change. It was going to be my first time to be seen in public with Christian since our announcement, which I was sure was all over the media by now. There were already paparazzi surrounding Ismintis and Escala, and I knew they would also be circling the Mile High Club like vultures. I wanted to look good for Christian. I wanted to surprise him by wearing my hair down and wearing a much sexier dress than I normally would have.

When I arrived at the Mile High Club at exactly 7 p.m., Christian was already there. He had instructed the Maitre D to show me into the same private dining room where we had spent time on the night we had met. When I walked into the room, Christian's jaw nearly hit the floor. Then, his smile was wider than I had ever seen it.

"You did it. You actually did it. I don't think I've ever seen any photos of you online with your hair down, but tomorrow, I will. And you're going to be standing right next to me. When we leave here tonight, I want to make sure every pap out there gets a good shot of us."

"As you wish," I responded. I couldn't take my eyes off him. He had also changed, and he looked sexier than ever in the suit he had on now. He wasn't wearing a tie, and his top two buttons were open. I wanted to rip that shirt off of him.

I enjoyed a dinner of grilled salmon with roasted vegetables, while Christian had the fillet mignon with baby red potatoes and a salad. We shared a creme brulee for dessert. I expected at any moment that Christian would try to get into my panties in that room, where he had given me our first orgasm. But he was a perfect gentleman. When we left the restaurant with Taylor and Sawyer escorting us, we stopped long enough for the paparazzi to get some good shots of us. We even kissed for them. But Sawyer ruined the moment by insisting that we cut it short and get out of the crowd. It annoyed me, but I knew that he was concerned about not being able to protect me in such an uncontrolled environment.

We decided to go back to Christian's penthouse instead of mine. Once there, I expected that we would go straight to his bedroom, but he wanted to share a glass of champagne first. We spent some time reflecting over the day, especially the press conference and evening out. And then we kissed, just kissed, for the longest time. After the two intense sex sessions in my office earlier that day, the change of pace was nice. Once again, he was making me feel cherished.

After some time, our kissing became more sensual, and we lost a few articles of clothing. We were just about to move it to the bedroom when I heard Taylor clear his throat. I nearly jumped out of my skin. It didn't help matters that I was wearing nothing but some very skimpy lingerie.

"What the hell, Taylor?!" Christian screamed.

"I apologize, sir, but it is urgent," Taylor answered.

"It better be," Christian threatened angrily. "What is it?"

"Sir, you need to see for yourself. Security footage," Taylor answered mysteriously.

"Security footage of what?" Christian asked.

"Elena Lincoln," Taylor answered. "And Isaac Horowitz."


	25. Chapter 25: The Witch is Dead! (CPOV)

**Chapter 25: Ding, Dong, the Witch is Dead! (Christian's POV)**

Without a word, Ana slipped her dress back on. I followed her lead and pulled my pants on. I didn't give a shit about my shirt at that point. We both followed Taylor down the hall.

"Taylor, I know you said it's urgent, but is it a matter of life or death? Something that can't wait until tomorrow?" I really didn't want to ruin my evening with Anastasia. So far, everything had been going perfectly.

Taylor answered gravely, "Yes, sir, I'm afraid it is. The most urgent thing right now is that I believe Mr. Horowitz's life may be in danger. The footage is from about two hours ago. We don't have anyone manning it around the clock, just scanning the footage once a day. So I was only made aware of this a few minutes ago."

We had made it to the security room, and Taylor turned to Ana. "Ms. Steele, you may not want to watch this. Parts of it are rather graphic."

"It's Ana, and I can handle it," she answered. The usual humor was missing from her voice as she corrected her name. We both knew that whatever we were about to see was going to be bad. I would have preferred to have left Ana out of it, but I knew better than to suggest that she return to the living room or my bedroom. From the way Taylor made it sound, we didn't have time for an argument.

Taylor tapped a key on the computer and began the video. I recognized the room immediately, and memories came flashing back. I could almost smell the lemon-scented furniture polish mixed with the leather and wood of Elena's dungeon. At first, we could only see Elena herself, cleaning her spanking bench, and then moving to clean the St. Andrew's Cross.

We heard Isaac's voice before we saw him. "I thought I would find you in here."

"Isaac," Elena looked up in surprise. "What are you doing here? I told you not to come back."

"I came to talk to you. I have some questions I want you to answer. Once I'm satisfied with your answers, I'll leave."

"Watch your tone, boy," Elena warned him. "You forget who is in charge here."

Isaac didn't back down. We could see him clearly now, and there was nothing submissive about his behavior. "You ended our contract, so I am no longer your submissive. You are not in charge of me. All I want is a few answers. That's it. Once you answer me, then I'll leave and never return."

She rolled her eyes dramatically. Funny how she could get away with that, but she had always punished me when I'd done it. "Fine," she said arrogantly. "But hurry up. What do you want to know?"

"Why did you tell me I was the only one?" he asked.

"Because you were," she answered.

"Liar," he accused her.

"Watch it, boy. I can still tie you to this cross and beat your ass raw," she warned him.

"I'd like to see you try," he responded without malice. "I am probably twice your weight. I can overpower you easily." He wasn't taunting or threatening her. He was just stating facts, unemotionally.

"What happened to you, Isaac? Did I break you that badly? Just a few days ago, you were so well behaved. I sincerely hope you haven't gone back to drinking and..."

"You're deflecting. I want to know why you lied to me about being the only one, and why you're still lying now."

"Why are you so convinced that I'm lying?" she asked him.

"Because you are," he answered matter-of-factly. "I know for a fact that there have been others. Christian Grey, for one."

I could hear her suck in air, in shock. It took her a moment to compose herself and respond, "Why in God's name would you believe that?"

"Because he told me," he answered her, still without anger.

We could see the shock on her face when she turned to stare at him. "He told you?! Why the hell...? Why would he...? You're lying.

"If I'm lying, then how else would I know? You know I'm telling you the truth. Now answer my question. Why did you lie to me?"

"What did he tell you?" she asked.

"That there are others. You started with him when he was fifteen. I was only fourteen when we first started. Are many other boys have you beaten and fucked? And why make me think I'm special? I was just another boy toy to you. Why don't you admit it?"

"What did you tell him?" She continued to evade his questions and press him for answers of her own.

"I told him everything. And I told his father too."

"Carrick?! Why the hell would you tell Carrick? Why would you tell anyone, for that matter? We have a non-disclosure agreement. I can press charges against you for talking."

Isaac laughed at her. Damn, how was this kid ever a sub? I was actually proud of him for standing up to her like this, even if I did wish he'd kept my name out of it. "Yes, you do that, Elena. Press charges. Right. You do realize that I'm a minor? I was a minor when I signed that stupid NDA, and I'm still a minor now. You can't press charges. But please, be my guest to try. Go to the police right now, and tell them what I've done. I'm sure they'll be very interested in your story." His tone was now taunting.

She stared at him, getting angrier with every word he said. When he finished, it took her a moment to connect the dots, but then her eyes got wide. "What have you done, Isaac?" she asked him incredulously, barely louder than a whisper.

"You should be asking yourself that question, Elena," he answered. "And I still want an answer. How many?"

"There's only one reason you'd tell Carrick Grey. He's going to represent you, isn't he? After all I've done for you, this is how you repay me?"

"After all you've done for me?" he questioned. "Really, Elena? Is that the best you can do? How many?

"How many young men have I pulled out of the gutter? How many have I given the gift of control? How many owe me for their success? I'm sure Christian Grey neglected to tell you that he would not be where he is today if it weren't for me. I taught him how to control his life, and I loaned him the money to start his business."

"He told me," he answered her. "And you're full of shit. If you aren't going to tell me how many, then just answer my other question. Why did you lie about it, that I was the only one?"

"Because I wanted you to feel special. Because you are special to me," she answered him.

"Bullshit," he responded. "Try again."

"It's not bullshit," she insisted.

"So let me get this right," he said. "You wanted me to feel special because then I would be more likely to let you manipulate me. Isn't that right?"

"I wasn't..."

"Bullshit!" he yelled, cutting her off. "You know, I was considering giving you one more chance. I've been thinking all afternoon... about dropping the charges I filed against you. I thought what we did, what we had, was worth something. But I was wrong. You may not have directly answered any of my questions, but you've given me all the answers I need. You can burn in hell!"

"You first," she responded.

I'm not sure when or where she'd gotten the gun while they had been standing there talking, but now she had one pointed at him, and before we even realized what was happening, she pulled the trigger. The bullet hit him in the arm. Leave it to Elena to miss at point blank range, but thank God she did. The impact of the shot pushed Isaac off his feet, but he quickly jumped up and charged her. Before she had a chance to pull the trigger again, he wrestled the gun away from her. In their struggle, the gun discharged again. For a moment, we could not see what had happened, but then Elena's eyes grew large... and frightened. So did Isaac's. He now had control of the gun, and he stepped away from her. We could see the blood on her chest, and the next moment, she fell to the floor.

"Oh, shit! No, no, no!" Isaac cried. "No, don't be dead! I hate you, but I don't want you dead!" He checked her pulse, and it appeared that he couldn't find one. And then, he stood there staring at her in shock for the longest time, until he let out a wail that I'm sure the neighbors must have heard. And he began to cry, hard. We watched the emotions on his face as they turned from shock to anguish to horror to panic. Once he began to panic, a moment later, he was gone. We were left staring at Elena's lifeless body on the floor in a puddle of blood.

Taylor stopped the video, and I was so shocked by what we'd just witnessed that it took me a moment to recover. When I was able to speak, I asked him, "Is she dead?"

"Yes, sir," he answered gravely.

"I'm sorry, Christian," Ana consoled me as she put her arm around me.

"Sorry? Why? I'm glad she'd dead. Now she can't hurt you." When Ana looked shocked, I continued, "She's made my life miserable, Ana. I'm not sad, but I am still worried about what the police will find to link me to her. Or worse, to make me look like a monster. But that's not the pressing issue right now." I turned back to Taylor and asked, "Where is Isaac and what steps have you taken so far?"

Taylor answered, "I sent our man in to investigate. He confirmed that she is dead. We have not yet called the police. I gave him orders to remove the camera. Also, to break into her safe and remove photos, videos, USB drives, anything like that. With any luck we'll get all of the footage she had of you, but we can't be sure. As soon as I had given him these instructions, I came to tell you. While you were watching the video, I heard from him. It is all done."

"So you haven't called the police yet?" I confirmed.

"Not yet, sir," he answered. "My first priority is to protect you."

"And what about Isaac?" I asked him.

"I've had someone watching his house since this afternoon. He returned home about an hour ago."

"Is anyone else there to get him medical care?" Ana asked.

Taylor didn't answer immediately. I knew he hated to admit it when he didn't know something. Finally he replied, "His mother works a night shift, and his father lives elsewhere. To my knowledge, he doesn't have any siblings."

"Shit!" Ana exclaimed. "He has an untreated gun shot. He could be bleeding to death!"

"Can you get the guy watching him to check on him?" I asked Taylor.

"He isn't opening the door, sir," Taylor responded.

"Call him, Christian. You have his cell number, don't you?" Ana said.

I took my phone from my pocket, thankful that I'd taken the time to put my pants back on. I called Isaac's number, but he didn't answer. I left him a message. "Isaac, I am very worried about you. Please call me back when you get this message. I know what happened tonight, and you don't need to worry about it. Let me help you."

After I ended the call, Ana said. "Taylor was right to have anything that could point back to you removed before calling the police. If they'd gotten any of those videos she was blackmailing you with, it could be just as bad as Hyde having them. Even the one we just watched could be damaging to you."

"Yes," I agreed, "but that video might be the only thing that saves Isaac. It proves that it was an accident. Or self defense at the very least. I'll get Barney to edit out the part about me before turning it over to the police."

"How are you going to explain how and why you have it to the police?" Ana asked.

"I don't know yet. But if Isaac is accused, I will have to give it to them. I'm sorry, Ana. At some point, I stopped caring as much about my reputation as I care about these kids... these other kids that she molested. God damn it, just a week ago, I wouldn't have even called it that, but things changed when I found out about them. I want justice for them. Hell, I want justice for myself. I'm not sure I even realized it until I talked to Isaac. But I'm sorry, because I should have told you all of that before we announced our relationship to the world. I certainly don't want you to get caught in a shit storm with me. I know how much your reputation..."

Ana cut off my words by pressing her lips against mine. She kissed me soundly, and before I could respond, she ended the kiss, looked me in the eyes, and said, "I am with you, Christian Grey. Let's do our best to keep you out of a shit storm. But if you end up in one, I will be right there with you." With that, she kissed me again, and this time, I kissed her back.

"You need to call your dad. We need to talk with him before we involve the police." Ana said when we ended the kiss.

"Sir, your father is already on his way here. I took the liberty to text him while we were watching the footage just now. He responded that he was already in Seattle, so he should be here any minute."

"Thank God we don't have to drive out to Bellevue tonight," I responded.

Ana put her hand on my shoulder and asked, "Christian, are you OK, really? I know she meant a lot to you at one point in your life."

I answered her without hesitation, "Yes, I'm fine. It's surreal though. She's really dead, isn't she? Ding, dong, the witch is dead! I don't feel sad about it, but relieved. I don't have to worry about her hurting you now. But I am still worried. Once the police get involved, I'm worried that she's got more copies of those damn videos somewhere that the police will find."

"We are trying to prevent that, sir," Taylor said.

The ding of the elevator told us that my dad had arrived. Ana and I headed out to meet him. It turned out that both of my parents were here. When I saw them, I nearly lost it. They hadn't seen me cry since I was a child, and I feared that if I cried now, they would all think that I felt sad that Elena was dead. That wasn't it at all. But I felt such overpowering relief that everything that she had put me through was coming to an end, and it was hard not to be emotional about it.

My mother noticed my distress right away. "Christian! What's wrong?" she asked.

I responded by putting my arms around her and hugging her. When I didn't move away right away, she carefully put her arms around me and returned the hug. When I finally moved back, there were tears in her eyes, as well as shock. It was the first time that I had ever let her hug me like that.

"What's going on, son?" Dad asked. "Taylor asked us to come by. He said something urgent has happened and that you need my legal advice."

"It's Elena Lincoln," I answered.

"What has that bitch done now," Mom asked spitefully.

"She's dead," I answered.

Both of them looked shocked. And then I saw panic in Mom's eyes. "Christian... you didn't...?"

"No!" I stopped her. "Mom, I didn't. I'm not sad she's dead, but I didn't have anything to do with it. Well, not directly anyway. I may have set things into motion that led to it though."

"What do you mean, son?" Dad asked.

"What I mean is that Isaac went to confront her earlier tonight, and they struggled over a gun. She tried to kill him first. The gun went off and killed her."

"And you know this... how?" Dad asked.

"I had her place bugged, Dad. Remember that detail that you didn't know about? We thought we'd get footage of her molesting a boy, not of her being shot by one."

"Do you have the video here, now?" Dad asked. When I nodded, he asked, "Can I see it?"

"Sure, Dad," I answered. "We just watched it in the security office. I'm sure it's still up on the computer in there."

"Grace, stay here," Dad told Mom. "I don't think this is something you need to see."

I turned to Ana. "Princess, would you mind staying here and filling Mom in on everything that happened while I bring Dad in to watch the video? I agree with Dad that Mom doesn't need to see it."

Ana and Mom went into the Living Room, and I saw Ana headed towards the wet bar as Dad and I turned back towards the security office.

After watching the video, Dad's first concern was Isaac. He suggested that Taylor or one of my other security staff make an anonymous call to the police to report a disturbance at Lincoln's house. We would need to talk to the police, but it could wait until after they had found her body and searched the crime scene. For now, Dad wanted to head straight to Isaac's house.

I was inclined to ask Mom and Ana to stay at my penthouse while Dad and I went to find Isaac, but they both put up a fight.

"Christian, he obviously needs medical attention," Mom argued. "Which one of you is qualified to provide that?"

I sighed. "OK, Mom, you're right. We need you."

"I'm going too," Ana insisted.

"You don't need..." I tried to argue.

"Don't tell me what I need," she cut me off. "I'm going."

Five minutes later, we all got into one of my SUVs, with Taylor driving and Dad riding shotgun. Reynolds followed in my other SUV with Sawyer. I sat in the backseat next to Ana, who held my hand, stroking it softly, which calmed my nerves. I was so glad that she'd insisted on coming. She talked quietly with Mom, but I wasn't focused on their conversation. Just the sounds of their voices made me feel happy. I realized that with Elena gone, I was truly free.

On the way, I tried calling Isaac again. Still there was no answer. I decided to text him instead. **I am on my way to your house. Please open the door when I get there.**

Still no response.

It took us about twenty minutes to drive to the apartment complex where Isaac lived with his mother. When he didn't answer the door, I ordered my security detail to break in. Instead, Taylor tried the door, and we found that it was unlocked. That seemed to put all the security officers on alert, as they all got out their guns at the same time. Within no time, they had searched the apartment, found Isaac in his room, and found no one else there. They put their guns away and cleared the way for us to enter Isaac's room. All four of us entered, one after the other, and the security stayed just outside the door.

He was lying on his bed, curled up on his uninjured side, shivering and crying. He seemed to still be in shock. His arm was still bleeding where he'd been shot, and his bed was a bloody mess.

"Isaac!" I called out.

I apparently scared the shit out of him because he screamed out when he heard me. But then he seemed to focus on me. "Christian?"

"It's going to be OK, Isaac," I told him. "I promise, it's going to be OK."

A horrified look came over his face when he realized what I was referring to, that I knew. "I killed her!" he shouted. "Oh my God, I killed her! She's dead! I'm a murderer!"

"Shh!" Ana said. She touched his arm lightly, carefully. "You are not a murderer. It was an accident."

Isaac focused on Ana, looking confused. "Who are you, and how do you know?"

She answered calmly, "I am Anastasia Steele, Christian's girlfriend. And I know because I watched what happened."

"I had video surveillance of Elena's dungeon," I explained. "I was trying to entrap her. I had no idea that you were going to go confront her."

"Yes, I know that was really stupid," he said. He turned to Dad and said, "I'm sorry I went against your counsel. You told me plainly to stay away from her. I just had to see her face one last time to let her know that I know what she is. I wanted her to be remorseful. I didn't mean to... She shot me! I had to get the gun away from her or she would have killed me!"

"I know," Dad said calmly. "I saw what happened too."

Mom stepped forward. She had her medical bag in her hand. "Isaac, I am Grace Trevelyan-Grey. I'm Christian's mom and Carrick's wife. And I'm a doctor. You need medical attention. That gunshot looks pretty bad." She stepped closer so she could get a better look at it.

"You need to be in the hospital," Ana told him. "You should have gone to the ER."

"But then I would have had to tell them what happened. That I killed her. I was scared. I don't want to go to jail. That would kill my mom. Oh my God, you're going to tell her, aren't you?"

Grace began to examine his wound. "Let's not worry about that right now," she said. "Let's focus on making sure you stay alive long enough to see her again." With that said, she began to put pressure on his wound.

"What!?" he shouted. "I might die?"

"You almost did," I reminded him. "If her aim had been just a little bit better, you would be the one lying on that dungeon floor."

"And if we don't stop your bleeding, you still might. This needs attention, and right now." Mom turned to me and said, "Christian, call 911, and then look for bandages. Anything clean that I can use to stop the bleeding. Maybe a sheet that we can cut into strips. You can ask Taylor to help you."

"You call 911, and I'll look for bandages," Ana offered, and she went out the door as Mom thanked her.

Mom told Isaac, "I don't see an exit wound, which means the bullet is still inside you. You're going to need surgery, the sooner the better."

Isaac began to cry again. "I have to tell my mom," he said through his sobs.

"Let me call her," I offered. When Isaac nodded, but then said that he couldn't remember her number off the top of his head, but that it was stored in his phone, I asked him for his phone.

"I think it's still in my jacket pocket," he said. I found a bloody jacket on the floor and searched the pockets. His phone was there, and I saw that he had a missed call from me, along with the text. That was all. I guessed that he was as much a loner as I had been.

Being the naive, trusting kid that he is, Isaac told me his code to unlock his phone, and I found his mother's number. I called her directly from Isaac's phone. "What is your mother's name?" I asked him as the phone began to ring.

"Brenda McDonald," he answered.

"Isaac, what's wrong?" she asked tiredly as she answered the phone. I guess he never called her at work unless something was wrong.

"Ms. McDonald, my name is Christian Grey. I am calling you from Isaac's phone, and he is here with me now. He is awake but is receiving medical care and can't talk on the phone at the moment. He asked me to call you to explain what is going on."

"Medical care? Is he injured?" She sounded panicked.

"Yes," I answered. "He was shot earlier tonight. The gunshot is in his arm, and it doesn't appear to be life threatening as long as he gets the treatment he needs. We are in your home at the moment, but we have called 911, so the paramedics are on the way. My mother, who is a doctor, is currently treating him, but she believes he needs surgery. We will ask the ambulance to take him to the University of Washington Medical Center, which isn't that far from here."

"Yes, I will meet you there," she answered. I heard a door close and her voice telling someone that she had to leave. The other person yelled something, but she explained calmly that it was a medical emergency. I heard a door slam, and then it sounded like she was running down stairs.

Ten minutes later, when the ambulance arrived, Isaac's arm was wrapped in strips that Ana had cut from a white sheet she found, and Mom was working hard to keep pressure on the wound. All that time, I'd kept Isaac's mother on the line, explaining with as few details as possible what had happened to him, letting her know what Mom was doing, talking her through each step. I told her when the paramedics arrived, and when they were moving him to the gurney. When Isaac cried out in pain, his mother gasped. "Is he OK?"

"He is in pain, but I think he will be OK once we get him to the hospital and he gets medicated," I answered. They are loading him in the ambulance now, and my mom will be with him the whole time.

"Yes, thank you," She answered.

"Do you need to go now so you can drive?" I asked her.

"I don't have a car," she answered. "I work near the hospital. I'm on foot, but I've been running towards the hospital since you told me. I hope I get there at the same time you do."

By now, Ana, Dad, and I were back in my car with Taylor driving us towards the hospital. "Where are you, Ms. McDonald?" I asked her. "We can pick you up on the way."

"I'm almost to Ravenna Park," she answered. "It's only a few blocks from the hospital.

"Taylor, take 15th Avenue through Ravenna Park," I directed him, and then I asked Ms. McDonald, "Which direction are you coming from?"

"From the Northeast. I'm on 25th Avenue running south."

"Taylor, go on to 25th. We'll pick her up on the way."

"I'm crossing 65th right now," she said.

"OK, stop where you are," I instructed. "Look for a bus stop or something that feels safe."

"It's the middle of the night in Seattle. Nothing feels safe. But I'm waiting for you near 25th and 65th. Are you far away?"

"Five minutes at the most," I answered.

"Just get here safely and take me to my son," she replied. When she sniffled, I knew she was crying.

"Holy fuck," I muttered to myself, hoping she didn't hear me. I was thinking what I would do if this were my mother, out in the middle of the night, running through the streets of Seattle because I had been shot by Elena Lincoln. Thanks to this kid, Elena Lincoln was no longer a problem. And thanks to my position in life, one I had been adopted into, my mother would have never been in the position that this one was. Why the hell didn't she have a car, and why the hell did she work at night when her son needed her at home?

"We're at 65th now," I told her. "A black Audi SUV. I think we have to cross the intersection to get to you."

A minute later, we were through the intersection, and Taylor pulled over to the curb. I stepped out and greeted the woman who had stood up as soon as she saw my black SUV.

"Ms. McDonald?" I asked.

She wiped her eyes on her sleeve before she answered, "Please, it's Brenda. You must be Christian Grey. Oh my God, you're Christian Grey!" When she realized who I was, she looked nervous, and tried to fix her hair. "I'm sorry, Mr. Grey. I applied for a job at GEH a few weeks ago... I'm sorry... I'm sorry... Can we get to the hospital, please?"

As I opened the car door for her, I said, "Please, call me Christian. And this is my girlfriend, Ana." Ana smiled at her reassuringly as she got in the car. I walked around the car and got in on Ana's other side.

"I'm so sorry I'm so sweaty and dirty," Brenda apologized again. "I'm sure I stink like beer. I had a customer spill his on me tonight."

"Oh wow, that sounds terrible," Ana said consolingly.

"So you work in a bar?" I asked her.

"Only at night. I have a day job too, but it doesn't pay enough for Isaac's school fees. I know some people might consider it frivolous to pay for private school, but Isaac is so bright, I wanted him to have a better chance of getting into an Ivy League. I knew he'd be more likely to qualify for scholarships if he had the right education.

"That's not frivolous at all," Dad said from the front seat. "I sent all my kids to private schools. I'm Carrick Grey, Christian's father. Please, call me Carrick. I've met your son, and you're right, he is very bright."

"Brenda, has Isaac mentioned anything to you about his meeting with me or Dad?" I asked her.

She looked surprised. "Isaac met with you?"

"Do you know the name Elena Lincoln?" Dad asked her.

"Elena Lincoln?" she repeated, thinking about it. "Isaac used to work for a Mrs. Lincoln. He did household chores for her after school, that kind of thing. I never knew her first name, and I never met her. But he told me last week that he quit, but he wouldn't explain why. Why are you asking?"

We had arrived at the ER entrance, and Taylor stopped so we could get out. "We will explain everything later," I assured Brenda.

When we got inside, we only had to wait a couple of minutes before Mom came out and found us. "How is he?" I asked.

"Wait," Dad interrupted. "First, Grace, this is Isaac's mother, Brenda McDonald. Ms. McDonald, my wife, Grace has been caring for Isaac since we found him at your house."

"He's alive," Grace said. "But he went into hypovolemic shock before we arrived at the hospital, and he lost consciousness as a result. He's lost a lot of blood, and he still needs to have surgery to remove the bullet. He still has a long night ahead of him."

Before any of us knew what was happening, Brenda was falling. She appeared to be fainting, probably from shock, or exhaustion, or both. It was reflex for me to catch her before she hit the floor. I held her in my arms and stared wide-eyed at Ana, the only one whose touch I'd ever been able to tolerate until I hugged Mom earlier tonight. It still felt very painful to let a stranger touch me, even if she was unconscious. It burned like hell, just like it always had. Ana saw it in my eyes, and she immediately went into action, steering me to a nearby chair where I could lower Brenda and let go of her without risking her falling. Once she was safe, and Mom and Dad were both checking on her, I turned to Ana and just held her in my arms. I never wanted to let her go.


	26. Chapter 26: Building the Door (APOV)

**Chapter 26:** _Building the Door (Anastasia's POV)_

"Wake up, dipshit!"

I woke with a start and sat up in the bed, blinking my eyes, and then groaning as the light filtering in from Christian's windows hit them. Beside me, I heard a similar groan.

"Now, there's a sight worth risking the wrath of Christian Grey to see," Elliot's too-loud voice called out snarkily from the door.

I looked down and groaned again before I fell back on the bed and pulled the sheet up over my naked breasts, which I'd just put on display for Elliot. "Shit," I muttered.

"What the hell are you doing here, Lelliot?" Christian mumbled from the other side of the bed.

"Oh, nothing, I just came to get an eye full of Ana, that's all," Elliot quipped.

Christian looked over at me questioningly. I told him, "Elliot just saw my boobs."

"Get out, asshole!" Christian yelled irately at Elliot.

Elliot ignored Christian's anger. "Why are you still in bed, fucktard?" he asked. "It's nearly 8:00. You never sleep past 6."

Christian groaned again before he swung his legs over the side of the bed and sat up. "You obviously haven't heard," he said to Elliot.

"Heard what?" Elliot asked.

"What happened last night," Christian replied. "Isaac Horowitz, Elena's latest fuck toy, is in the hospital in critical condition. He decided to confront her last night, and she shot him."

"That bitch!" Elliot breathed. "She needs to rot in hell."

"I have no doubt that she is doing just that," Christian said dryly, and then he explained to Elliot, "She was killed last night. Isaac tried to get the gun away from her, and it went off and killed her as they were fighting over it."

"Elena Lincoln is dead?" Elliot asked incredulously.

"Elena Lincoln is dead," Christian stoically confirmed.

"Holy shit!" Elliot exclaimed.

Christian explained, "Ana and I, along with Mom and Dad, went to Isaac's house and found him bleeding to death. We called 911 and went to the hospital. He was out of surgery but still in critical condition when we left there early this morning."

"Dad told me yesterday that he went with Isaac to the police station to file charges against her," Elliot said.

"Yep," Christian confirmed.

I wasn't bothered by their conversation taking place in Christian's bedroom, but I really needed to get up and use the bathroom. "Do you guys think we can continue this conversation over breakfast?" I asked politely.

"What's wrong, Ana Banana?" Elliot asked teasingly, "Afraid I'm gonna see your tits again?"

Christian didn't give me a chance to respond. "Elliot, shut the fuck up, and get out. Go see what Gail has cooked for breakfast. I'll be out in a few minutes."

When Elliot closed the door behind him, I groaned again. "I have to talk to him," I told Christian. "I need to nip this thing with him in the bud before it gets too uncomfortable."

"Ana, Elliot doesn't mean anything by his stupid comments," Christian assured me. "He doesn't have a thing for you. You're both subs, so he knows it wouldn't work. And he's committed to Kate. Elliot doesn't want you. He just likes to push your buttons."

"OK, well, it won't hurt to make sure," I answered. "Besides, you and I both know I'm not really a sub. I just like to be on the bottom during really kinky sex."

"Subs come in all shapes and sizes, princess," Christian reminded me.

This was a conversation that we didn't have time for, and that I didn't think was important anyway. "I'm going to shower, and then I need to make sure things are all set for Elliot to start the renovations. I already told Hannah I'd be in late today because I scheduled Elliot for this morning. My first meeting isn't until 11. What about you?"

Christian looked at his phone, probably at his calendar, before he answered. "I was supposed to have a breakfast meeting, but I emailed Andrea in the middle of the night to cancel it. I have a conference call at 10, but I can do that from here. After that, I want to go back over to the hospital. Ros can handle things in the office this afternoon if need be. All in all, I'd say that I have plenty of time to enjoy a nice hot shower with you."

"I like the sound of that," I told him with what I hoped was a seductive smile.

We took our time in the shower, bringing each other to climax more than once, making up for the moment that had been stolen from us the night before. When we'd come home at 4 a.m., we'd been too tired to do anything other than strip off our clothes and fall asleep in each other's arms.

After we both got dressed, we joined Elliot for breakfast. Once we had shared more of the details about the previous night's events, the conversation then became light-hearted. Christian and Elliot casually discussed the Mariners and Elliot's business. Elliot was expecting to begin a large commercial project in the coming week or so, and it would probably take three or four months to complete. I ate quietly as I listened to them talk, still feeling uncomfortable with Elliot, and knowing I needed to say something to him about his seeming attraction to me.

As soon as Christian was finished eating, he called his dad to find out the latest on Isaac. The conversation continued longer than expected, and Christian ended up in his office. Before he left the room, I garnered from the one-sided conversation that Isaac was still in critical condition, that the police were not pressing charges against him, and that they had ruled Elena's death an accident. I assumed from this turn of events that Barney had finished editing the video and had turned it over to the police. If questions were asked about how it had been obtained, somehow the issue had been smoothed over.

Left alone with me, Elliot began to discuss the door that he was constructing to connect my penthouse to Christian's. He seemed oblivious to any awkwardness between us, so I considered just dropping it, but I decided that there was no better time than the present to put to rest any feelings that he was developing for me, if that was happening.

"Elliot, I think we need to get something clear between us before we continue to discuss the renovation," I told him.

He looked at me blankly, waiting for me to continue.

Damn. This was going to be harder than I thought. I cleared my throat, willing myself not to blush, as I continued. "Christian told me that you were interested in... He said you'd asked him about…" Damn it, I couldn't finish either of those sentences. OK, Ana, just say it. "This morning, I wasn't comfortable with the comments you made about seeing my breasts. I'm not interested in… I don't want…" Damn it! Why was I suddenly having such a hard time finishing a fucking sentence? I hoped from what I had been able to say that he'd get the message.

"Oh, shit!" Elliot exclaimed, finally catching on. "No, no, no, Ana. I'm not... I mean, you're hot as hell, but still... I'd never... Ana, I'm in love with Kate. Head over heels, fucking _in love_ with her. Like, wanting to be chained to her bed for the rest of my life, in love. Like, making plans for an official collaring ceremony where she can claim me publicly, right after I put a diamond ring on her finger, in love with her. She's more than my Domme. So much more. She's the love of my life. I would never disrespect her like that. Or Christian either for that matter. I mean, if you were into it... I mean if _Christian_ and you were into group play, then... _if Kate and Christian_ agreed... The only way I'd ever fuck you is if Kate and Christian were both there, watching and dominating us. But that's never going to happen."

"Oh, thank God," I muttered. "You're right, Elliot. That's never going to happen."

"I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable," Elliot apologized. "But honestly, I didn't know you were modest, and I didn't know my teasing bothered you. I mean, I thought you were OK with nudity, because you were naked at the play party. I thought you were into exhibitionism, and I sure as hell am a voyeur. No apologies there. Kate is too. We both got a lot of pleasure out of watching you and Christian at the play party. It was one of the hottest scenes I've ever watched."

Now I couldn't contain my blush. "I didn't know you were watching," I said shyly. "I pretty much shut out everyone except Christian."

"We noticed," Elliot responded. "It was after we'd watched that forced orgasm scene that I suggested the idea of group play with you and Christian. At first, Kate was open to the idea, but later, she nipped it in the bud. She said we could do group play, but not with you and Christian. She said that was a really bad idea. So did Christian, actually. So Kate set us up with another couple, and it was just as hot as I expected it would be. She's not even bi, but she knew I wanted to see her go down on another chick, so she did it for me. Holy shit, was that ever hot…"

I had already heard too much, but I'd felt like I was watching a train wreck, unable to stop him from talking. Finally, I couldn't take any more. "Elliot, stop!" I said forcefully. "I don't want to hear about your sex life! If I want details, I'll ask Kate! I don't want to have this conversation with you!"

Elliot looked shocked, and embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Ana," he said contritely, but he also looked confused.

I felt guilty, but I wasn't sure why. I knew that I needed to smooth things over with Elliot. "Look Elliot, I get that people in the lifestyle are often open with each other about their personal lives, but I'm new to the lifestyle, and I'm not used to that kind of openness. And you're Christian's brother. And Christian and I… It's all so new, but…" I trailed off.

"You're in love with him," Elliot finished for me.

"Well, yes. I am. It's happened really fast, but yes," I admitted.

"I get it, Ana, and I'm sorry," Elliot apologized again. "Of course you don't feel comfortable talking about sex with your future brother-in-law. That's totally understandable."

I stared at him like a deer caught in headlights, and it took me a moment to gather my wits enough to respond. "Elliot… Christian and I haven't discussed… It's too soon to even think about marriage."

"Bullshit," Elliot responded. "I've already picked out a ring for Kate. And I met her the day after you met Christian. It's not too soon. When you know, you know."

"Elliot, it hasn't even been one week yet," I reminded him.

He insisted, "I'm telling you, Ana, when you know, you know. It only takes a moment. I knew the moment I saw Kate walking towards us at the play party. If you're honest with yourself, you can name the moment you knew too."

Yes, I could. It was the moment we made the pinky promise at the Zig Zag Café. But I wasn't going to tell Elliot that. "Elliot, let's get back to the renovation, OK? I'm going to need to leave for work pretty soon, so I want to make sure we've got that all clear before it gets too late.

Elliot smirked at me. "Sure, Ana, whatever you say," he said.

Thankfully, all the awkwardness was gone between Elliot and me, and we spent the next half hour discussing the door that Elliot was going to add, as well as security measures that would be needed with the addition of the door. I also broached the topic of an office renovation that I was interested in for the eighth floor of Ismintis. I felt that all the cubicles where my staff currently worked were not private enough. I often expected them to conduct telephone interviews with potential business partners, and the current layout wasn't conducive to that. Elliot suggested a couple of ideas, but he reminded me that he probably wouldn't be able to give it his undivided attention until after he finished the big project he was supposed to start the following week. He could put some of his workers on it though, and oversee the work on both projects.

Towards the end of our conversation, Christian came back in, having finished the conversation with both of his parents. "Good news," he announced. "Isaac's condition has been downgraded from critical to serious. He still has a long road ahead of him, but he's awake and talking. He had a panic attack when he first woke up, but when Dad assured him that the police had ruled Elena's death an accident, he calmed down."

"Poor kid," I said.

Christian nodded. "Poor kid, and poor mother too. Turns out… you'll never guess who his biological father is."

"Someone I know?" I asked.

"Someone you know _of_ , certainly," he answered. "Joseph Horowitz. He was even married to Brenda when she gave birth to Isaac. But they were already separated, and their divorce was finalized shortly after Isaac's birth. When she got pregnant, he didn't want to have anything more to do with her. Or the baby."

Elliot asked Christian, "Joseph Horowitz…from Rainier Enterprises? Didn't he give you shit when you first started GEH?"

"Yep," Christian replied. "And again when he ran for State Senate a couple of years later, and I backed his opponent, Pramila Jayapal. He tried to discredit me, but it backfired on him. Anyway… he hasn't had any contact with his son since he was born. He doesn't support him at all."

"How does he get away with that?" I asked.

"Not sure," Christian answered, "but my guess is that Brenda hasn't bothered to fight him for child support. He probably made her sign a pre-nup, which would explain why he doesn't have to pay her alimony, but it doesn't explain the lack of support for his son."

"I knew he was a rat bastard," Elliot said.

Christian continued, "So now… since Elena was killed last night, there's media coverage, and Isaac's name was leaked to the press, even though he's a minor, so he should have been protected. If the media follow protocol, they won't mention his name on the air, but there's no guarantee that some asshole won't name him, and once it's out there, the vultures will be circling. Brenda is worried not only about what that kind of media exposure will do to Isaac, but also about what Joseph might do if his name is connected to Isaac, and therefore to Elena."

"Why? What's she worried that he might do?" I asked.

Christian answered, "Well, this is only speculation… Brenda doesn't know that I know this… and Dad doesn't know it either, and I'm not going to tell him. But Joseph Horowitz is in the lifestyle. He's a Dom. And I don't have any proof, but I suspect that Elena supplied him with submissives the same way she used to do that for me. Except that it is possible… there have been rumors… his submissives might have been underage. And non-consensual."

"Shit!" Elliot gasped. "And you know this… how?"

"I don't know it," Christian emphasized. "I only suspect it, and I can't prove it. You know how protective this community is. But I've heard rumors, and when it comes to that son of a bitch, I'm inclined to believe them."

"So what exactly are you worried about?" I asked Christian. "Do you think he will hurt Isaac? Or is he also a danger to you personally?"

Christian was pensive for a moment before he responded, "Yes, I am afraid he will hurt Isaac, mentally and emotionally. The kid is pretty fragile right now, and having an asshole that you've never known for a father… one who is concerned only about his public image… and especially if the media get involved... Well, I know I sound like fucking Flynn when I say this, but it could be really damaging to his psyche. And speaking of Flynn, I suggested to Dad that I arrange some appointments for Isaac, but I need to talk to him and Brenda about it first. As for whether I think Joseph might be a danger to myself, there's always the possibility that if he was connected to Elena, he knows about me. If he knows, he could out me. And I have no doubt that if he feels that I'm a threat to him in any way, he will. Unless I have something on him to keep him quiet, of course."

"And you discussed all this with Dad?" Elliot asked.

Christian nodded. "Except for the part about the BDSM and underage sex slaves, because I can't involve Dad in that without any evidence."

"What are you going to do, Christian?" I asked him suspiciously.

"What I've already done," Christian replied, "is to have Barney look into his background, to look for connections to Elena. And I've put a tail on him. Two, actually. I've also assigned CPOs to both Isaac and Brenda."

Elliot whistled. "Oh, to be the great and powerful Christian Grey," he said sarcastically. "But seriously, bro, isn't that a bit of an overreaction?"

"Maybe," Christian replied. "But my gut tells me that Joseph is going to be trouble, and so are the media if Isaac's name gets mentioned."

"I trust your gut like I trust my own," I told him. "In all the years I've been following you, you've rarely been wrong."

"You've been stalking Christian?" Elliot sarcastically asked.

"I'm his biggest fan girl," I quipped back at him, batting my eyelashes.

Christian ignored the exchange between Elliot and me. "Yeah, well, I was wrong about Elena. You called me on that," he reminded me. The next moment, his cell phone buzzed. "And on that note, I have to get back to my office. I have a conference call in five minutes with my Paris office. Fucking morons."

"OK, I'm leaving for my office," I said. "Call me later with an update on Isaac."

"Yes, ma'am," Christian answered sarcastically, causing me to roll my eyes at him.

"You know how I feel about being called 'ma'am,'" I reminded him.

He smirked back at me. "You know how I feel about eye rolling."

Elliot looked confused, but then he smirked at both of us. "I'm not sure which one of you is getting punished later. Ana would make one hot Domme."

"She would, wouldn't she," Christian agreed proudly.

Elliot looked surprised. "And you're OK with that, bro? You gonna sub for her?"

Christian gave me a panty-dropping smile. "Yep," was all he answered, without looking at Elliot. The way he was looking at me made me all hot and flustered.

"I really have to go," I said breathlessly.

"So do I," Christian responded. "But I'll be in touch."

We kissed goodbye, and I met Sawyer and Prescott at the elevator. After my 11 a.m. meeting with Jinghui Zhang, the CEO of Mount Baker Investments, a small firm that had approached me the previous month interested in a merger, I still had a full afternoon full of work to get through. It was quite productive though. In spite of no longer having a COO, I was able to lay the foundation for two new acquisitions, in addition to Mount Baker Investments. I also managed to look over the spreadsheets for Sunset Media and make a decision about it. I spent the rest of my time looking over files for the three candidates I was considering for my COO.

Christian and I texted... and sexted... back and forth all afternoon, and each time my phone pinged with a new text, I felt as giddy as a school girl. It all started with a text from Christian that came in shortly after my meeting with Jinghui Zhang ended: **Have you had lunch, kitten?**

Me: **I'm eating lunch right now.** **Hannah brought me a sandwich from the deli on the corner. You?**

Christian: **Yes, but I'm still hungry.**

Me: **Why? What did you have?**

Christian: **Cobb salad. It was OK. I'm not hungry for food.**

Me: **Oh, really?**

Christian: **How's your lunch, kitten? Is it filling you up?**

Me: **I know something that could fill me up much better than this sandwich.**

Christian: **What's that, kitten?**

Me: **You know what, tiger.**

Christian: **Tell me.**

Me: **Tell you what, tiger? That I wish you were here, so you could fill me up?**

Christian: **Tell me what part of your delectable body you want me to fill up.**

Me: **We were talking about food, right? I believe that usually goes in our mouths.**

Christian: **What would you like me to put in your mouth, kitten?**

Me: **Something hard that I can lick and suck before I swallow the whole thing down my throat.**

Christian: **I know what I'm giving you for dessert tonight, after I take you out for dinner again.**

Me: **I can hardly wait, tiger. But do you really want to go out for dinner again? We could stay in and have dessert first.**

Christian: **I like the way you think. And I'm hungry for dessert too.**

Me: **What would you like to eat for dessert?**

Christian: **Something juicy. Incredibly juicy and creamy. And addictive.**

Me: **Addictive? Does that mean it's habit forming?**

Christian: **It most certainly is, and I'm already an addict.**

Me: **Should I feel guilty about feeding your addiction?**

Christian: **Not at all. Besides, I've heard that those hard things that you like to lick and suck can also be habit forming. At least, I hope they are.**

Me: **Generally speaking,** **I'm not sure if they are, and I don't want to find out. But I know that I'm definitely addicted to yours. And unashamed.**

Christian: **Oh, kitten, I plan on feeding that addiction to your heart's desire.**

Me: **Purrrr.**

Christian: **How wet are you, kitten?**

Me: **Drenched.**

Christian: **I think I need to go jack off before I head back to GEH.**

Me: **You better not, tiger. Yours belong to me too, remember? Where are you right now?**

Christian: **Will you punish me if I come without your permission, Goddess?**

Me: **When the time comes, yes I will.**

Christian: **I wish I could see your blush right now, Princess.**

Me: **What makes you so sure that I'm blushing, Sunshine?**

Christian: **Because you are. And to answer your earlier question, I'm at the hospital. I saw Isaac. If all goes well today, they're going to move him to a private room tomorrow and downgrade his condition to fair. He's in the clear regarding the shooting.**

Me: **Did you talk to Brenda?**

Christian: **Yes. She confirmed my suspicions. I'll tell you more later. I offered her a job at GEH.**

Me: **That's great. So what are our plans tonight?**

Christian: **What time will you be finished?**

Me: **I plan to leave here no later than 6, whether I'm finished or not. Then, I want to go home and take a bath.**

Christian: **Then I will meet you in your bathroom at 6:30. I will put our new door to good use. My kitten needs her dessert, after all. After that, we can walk back through our door and have dinner that I'll get Gail to make us.**

Me: **Purrrfect. I'll be nice and wet for you, Tiger.**

Christian: **That's enough of comments like that if I have to last until 6:30.**

Me: **OK, I have to get back to work anyway. Enjoy your afternoon!**

Christian: **I will now.**

At first, it was hard for me to get focused back on work, but when I did, I knocked it out of the park. I accomplished more that afternoon than I had the previous week combined. And from time to time, I still thought about Christian and the steamy text message... and what I had to look forward to at 6:30.

As Sawyer drove me home, I thought back to my conversation with Elliot that morning. I was incredibly relieved that I didn't have anything to worry about with Elliot being attracted to me, but I found it surprising that he was already beginning to think of me as his future sister-in-law. Was he right? Did I want to marry Christian?

"Yes," I said out loud. In that moment, I could see a happily ever after with him.

"Yes, what?" Sawyer asked as he glanced over at me.

"Nothing," I answered. "Just thinking out loud."

Sawyer nodded, and kept his eyes on the road, and I went back to my mental processing. What about kids? Would Christian want kids? Did I? I had never considered it because I didn't have time for a family. Christian and I were both too busy running our empires to have time for kids. But if time weren't an issue, what then? For the first time in my life, I considered what it would be like to carry a baby, and to give birth to a baby. Not just any baby, but Christian's baby. Holy shit! I realized for the first time ever that I actually did want to be a mother... someday. I wanted to have a family... with Christian. I wanted to carry a little copper-haired boy on my hip while I looked into Christian's adoring grey eyes. I was shocked at myself, not only for this new realization, but also for the intensity of my feelings. My greatest fear now was that Christian would not want the same thing. And it was much too early in our relationship to say anything to him about it. At least we didn't need to discuss this topic anytime in the near future. I would need to have my IUD removed when I decided to try to get pregnant, and that would not happen in the foreseeable future. Until then, whether or not we would start a family together would not be an issue. Again, I was surprised to feel a little let down at that thought. Surely, it was way too early in our relationship for me to be having these thoughts.

The first thing I did when I got home was to inspect the door that Elliot had finished constructing, which was perfect. I was happily surprised when I opened it that I could walk directly into Christian's penthouse without any barriers. I saw Gail working in Christian's kitchen, and I spoke to her, startling her. We chatted briefly, and I was happy to find out that she was making us Chicken Marsala for dinner.

Walking back through the new door, I went into my kitchen and prepared a tray to take into my bathroom. First, I grabbed a bottle of chilled chardonnay and two wine glasses, and to that, I added some cheese, strawberries, and grapes. Tray in hand, I headed to my bathroom, placed it by the tub, and stripped out of my business suit. I took down my hair, and braided it into one long braid, the way I knew Christian liked it when we played. I lit a few candles around the tub and turned on the faucet. As the tub began to fill, I found some soft music that was both relaxing and romantic. I added some lavender scented bath oil to the tub, and poured two glasses of wine. Then I stripped off the rest of my clothes and climbed into the bath.

At 6:25, Christian found me relaxing in my tub, sipping Chardonnay, and smiling contentedly. For a few moments, we simply stared hungrily at one another, neither of us speaking.

Christian was the first to speak, "You're so fucking beautiful, Princess."

I smiled up at him and invited him to join me in the tub. Without taking his eyes from me, he began to strip. My eyes roamed up and down his body as he exposed more of it, and with my smile, I showed him that I was enjoying the floor show. "You're pretty fucking beautiful yourself, Sunshine," I said softly.

When he finally stripped off his boxers, I couldn't take my eyes off his engorged cock. "You look like you're ready for dessert, kitten," he said. He sat on the side of the tub, putting only his feet in the water.

"Mmmmm," I responded, as I slid toward him. Without another word, I licked his shaft, and then I sucked the head of his penis into my mouth. I cupped his balls and massaged them softly as I continued to lick and suck. Christian tugged at my braid. I looked up at him, and the mixture of ecstasy and reverence on his face almost pushed me over the edge, even though he wasn't even touching me. I responded by deep throating him the way I knew drove him wild. It only took a few seconds and a couple of swallows before I felt the hot spurts of his cum hitting the back of my throat.

Once I knew he had emptied himself, I released him, and he slid into the tub behind me. As he began to stroke my arms, chest, and breasts, I closed my eyes and rested my head on his chest. Sighing contentedly, he said, "If I had known how great vanilla could be, I would have tried it long ago. But somehow, I don't think it could have ever worked with anyone else. I love you, Anastasia."

"Mmmm," I responded contentedly. Without opening my eyes, I said, "I love you too, Christian."

We relaxed for a few more moments, but eventually, we bathed one another, and then enjoyed the wine and fruit while we talked. He caught me up on his day, including the details from his conversations with Isaac and Brenda. It turned out that Brenda's relationship with Joseph had been extremely abusive. She had been underage at the time that they first hooked up, and she had married him when she was only eighteen. He had forced her into submission, and Christian was certain that she had never experienced any of the freedoms that come from submitting in the BDSM lifestyle, and he doubted that she even knew anything about it. Joseph had had too many affairs to count during their marriage, often bringing girls home, even coercing Brenda to participate in threesomes. I was a bit surprised at how candid Brenda had been with Christian about her personal life. It made me a little uncomfortable.

I asked him, "So, you mentioned earlier than she confirmed your suspicions. I assumed you were referring to the underage non-consensual partners, right?"

Christian explained, "She confirmed that Joseph knew Elena, and I'm looking into the leads that Brenda gave me. I already had evidence that Elena was involved in forced child prostitution, and I expect to find something linking Joseph to that. I hope you don't mind... I asked Samantha to help Barney. They make a great team."

"Our very own Gilbert and Sullivan," I quipped. "Yes, that's fine. Samantha is amazingly good at what she does."

A funny look crossed Christian's face, but it was gone just as quickly. "Let's get out of this water before your gorgeous skin gets all pruny. Besides, I'm still hungry for my dessert.

Moment later, I found myself tied to my bedpost, being devoured by Christian's talented tongue. He was so relentless that I came three times before he untied me. Once I returned to earth, when I was finally composed enough to look at the smug smirk on his face, I couldn't help but giggle at him.

"Not that I'm complaining, because your giggle is my favorite sound in the world, but what's so funny?" he asked.

"You," I answered. "You're so proud of yourself."

"Damn straight," he answered. "How many orgasms have you had since we met?"

"I lost count a long time ago," I answered.

"And this from the person who used to have to get herself off every time she had sex. If I recall correctly, you thought there was something wrong with you. I hope I've proven that there's not a damn thing wrong with you. You're absofuckinglutely perfect in every way."

"'Absofuckinglutely perfect in every way' is a pretty high standard to live up to," I responded. "I'm just glad that I've fallen victim to your sexpertise."

"You're no victim, sweetheart," Christian said. "But I understand what you mean. I've fallen under your spell too."

We got dressed and walked through our new door into Christian's penthouse, where Gail had set the table for us. We enjoyed the Chicken Marsala while I told Christian about my productive day. Towards the end of our meal, Christian got a somber look on his face.

"What's wrong?" I asked him.

He sighed before he answered. "I don't want to ever be separated from you. I've never been able to sleep at night without nightmares, but in the past week, since you've been sharing my bed, I haven't had a single nightmare. And now... fucking morons in Paris... I have to go take care of it." He looked up at me mournfully, but then his look turned hopeful as he asked, "I don't suppose you could come with me?"

Paris? I would love nothing more than to go with Christian to Paris, but was that even possible? "When are you going?" I asked.

"Tomorrow," he answered. "I'm going to work until 4 p.m. or so, and then my flight is scheduled to leave at 6. I'll get there in time to spend all of Friday straightening up all their shit, and then Saturday smoothing things over, before I return here Sunday. Unless of course you can come too, in which case we can stay a little longer."

I thought carefully before I answered him. As much as I wanted it, I knew it was impossible. "I'm sorry, Christian. I can't leave Ismintis right now, not without a COO. Things are too shaky since Jack's... departure. Leaving now, even for just a couple of days, would send the wrong message. Besides, I have meetings Friday that I can't miss. I wish I could. I hope we can do it later, when we don't have pressing work to get in either of our way."

Christian nodded sadly. "I knew that would be your answer. I know, Anastasia, what it takes to run a successful business. Of course you can't go. Anyway, it's only a couple of days. We'll survive it."

We were finished eating, so I got up from the table, took his hand, and walked to the couch. When he sat down, I curled up in his lap. "I'm going to miss you, Christian," I said sadly.

"Me too, princess," he answered as he pulled me closer and nuzzled my neck.

"You're going to miss our one week anniversary," I told him.

Christian raised his head and pulled my braid so I had to turn and face him. His eyes showed his surprise. "Have we really only been together for a week?" he asked.

I giggled. "Not even a week," I reminded him. "One week ago, I only knew you by reputation, and I hated you."

He smiled fondly. "I'm glad you don't hate me any more. Although... I have to say... angry Ana is fucking hot."

"I'll remind you of that after we have our first big fight," I promised.

He pulled me back and nuzzled my neck again. "You won't have to remind me. Angry sex with you will be amazing. But make-up sex will be even better."

"I'll settle for 'I missed you' sex when you get back from Paris," I told him.

"How about 'I'm going to miss you' sex right now?" he asked as he cupped my breasts and rubbed my nipples with his thumbs. I melted into his hands.

We didn't make it to the bedroom, and only after Christian had flown with me over the edge of paradise for a second time did I stop to ask him about the security footage. He assured me that Taylor had turned off the cameras earlier. We went back to my penthouse for the night, and we made love again before we fell asleep.

The next day was uneventful. I got through three more meetings and plugged away, now carrying the bulk of Hyde's work in addition to my own, which I expected to be the norm until I hired a new COO. Throughout the morning, I could not shake my feeling of dread. I hated the idea of Christian being away, even for only a couple of days. But he surprised me for lunch, strolling in with take-out dishes from one of my favorite Italian restaurants. Like the previous night, we enjoyed dessert first. After I locked my door, Christian lay down on my couch, and I got on top of him in a sixty-nine position. It was a perfect send-off.

An hour later, we were both full of the food he had brought, and sated from another round of steamy sex in the shower of my office ensuite. I clung to him like a needy teenager before he forced himself to leave. I knew it would be the last time I'd see him in person before he returned from France.


	27. Chapter 27: Alone in Paris (CPOV)

**Chapter 27:** _Alone in Paris (Christian's POV)_

"Yes! Yes! Christian! Don't stop! Oh my God! Right there! Yes!"

"Spread those legs for me, kitten," I commanded her. "Just like I'm using a spreader bar. Feel my tongue on your clit. Pinch your nipples, kitten. Yes, just like that."

"Oh, God! That's good, so good. I need... Christian... I need to... Arghhh!"

I watched in delight as Anastasia shattered before my eyes. "You didn't have permission to come, Princess," I reminded her once she had come back down to earth. I had a feeling that she knew I wasn't serious.

"Are you going to punish me?" she asked with a smirk. "I also used your name. Several times in fact."

"You did," I agreed. "I counted three times. Last night, you called out my name four times. You didn't ask permission to come then either. You're piling up your infractions, Princess. But don't worry, I have all kinds of creative ways to punish you." I tried to give her my best Dom glare, but I knew I was losing my touch. In only a week, I had gone totally soft.

Ana giggled, which of course made me even harder than I already was. Then she looked at me seductively and said, "I can't see you like you can see me, but I have a feeling you have a little problem that I need to take care of."

What the hell, I thought to myself. The previous night, I had focused on Ana's pleasure, preferring to let my hard-on eventually go away. I had wanted to put it off until I saw her because I knew from experience how gratifying a delayed orgasm could be. I also had never done what I was about to do, neither on a video chat or even on the phone. But now, I didn't want to wait.

"There's nothing little about my problem," I told her as I stood up, removed my boxers, which was all I was wearing, and adjusted my laptop so that the camera showed Ana more of my body, including my hard-on. If this amazing woman, who clearly had a phobia of cameras, so much so that she had safe worded during our first playroom scene when I had videoed her, could swallow her fear and allow me to watch her masturbate, then I could certainly do the same for her. We both trusted one another enough to know neither of us was recording our Skype conversation.

"Now, that's more like it," Ana said, still using that seductive voice that alone could make me come if she kept it up. And then she did. "Look at me, tiger," she said, and I did. "I want you to imagine me kneeling in front of you, as naked as I am right now. I'm wearing my collar, and we're in the playroom. I kiss your feet, and then I ask for your permission to worship your cock. You grant it, and I respond by kissing just the tip of your cock, ever so lightly. I look up at you, and you notice the pre-cum on my lips before I lick it off and thank you. Then, very lightly and carefully, I massage your balls, and you moan loudly as I lick up and down your shaft."

I couldn't hold back a moan as I stroked myself, imagining it was Ana's tongue. She kept going, describing with candid detail how she would take me into her mouth, suck me, deep throat me, and swallow every drop of my cum as it hit the back of her throat. Sure enough, just as she got to that part, I came gloriously, and I used my boxers to keep from messing up the bed. Holy shit, my girl knew how to Skype.

"Thank you, Master," Ana said cheekily.

"Ana," I warned her. Even though we weren't in a D/s relationship, and I no longer wanted her as a sub, I didn't want her taking it lightly. I hoped that we would keep up our playroom scenes, and even though I wanted to be her Dom on most of those occasions, I was also more than willing, and very much looking forward to subbing for her. I wanted her to take BDSM seriously because it was such an important part of my life, even if I had gone vanilla for her.

"Sorry," she said. "But seriously, did you enjoy that as much as I did?"

I smiled to show her that I did, but I answered, "I'll enjoy it more tomorrow night when we can do it in person."

"Don't forget, the next time we go into the playroom, I won't be wearing my collar," she reminded me playfully.

I smiled, but responded seriously, because I wanted her to take it all seriously, whether she was talking about Dominance or submission. I didn't think, deep down, that either of us was really a switch, but I looked forward to exploring with her. "I'm not likely to forget that, Goddess, and I can hardly wait."

It was our second night in a row of Skype sex, and hopefully our last since I would be coming home to her the next day. It had taken me some real effort to convince her to get naked for me, and even more to get her to touch herself, mainly because she had started her period. She honestly didn't think she could masturbate while menstruating, but I managed to convince her to do it for me. She'd refused to remove her tampon, but she spread her legs and let me watch her rub her clit and her nipples. I was surprised that she hadn't put up more of a fight to being naked on camera, after our first playroom catastrophe, but she was more concerned about her period than about the camera.

"I trust you, Christian," she had said. Those words were just as meaningful to me as when she told me she loved me. As a Dom, trust had always been a pivotal part of my relationships with my subs, but with Anastasia, it was so much more. I didn't believe I even had a heart, much less had the ability to love someone, until she entered my life. In just a few days, everything had changed. My entire outlook on life was different now. For one thing, I couldn't imagine life without Ana in it. And for the first time in my life, before I made any decision, I thought about someone other than just myself.

I had completed everything I came to Paris to do, and I was looking forward to getting back home to Seattle… and Ana. I had agreed with Taylor that we should try to get a few hours of sleep in our hotel before taking an early morning flight, and he had scheduled with my pilot for a 6 a.m. departure. I didn't expect to get much sleep though, since I had a hard time falling asleep without Ana there with me. I was afraid of nightmares. For the first time in my life, I was finally able to sleep without having a nightmare… but only when she was in bed with me. Without her, my mind just would not shut off enough to sleep.

Overall, my trip to Paris had been successful. It had only taken me a few hours to sort out the problems with the Paris office of GEH. It turned out, they weren't all fucking morons. There really was just one moron who was fucking everyone else over, including me. It was a shame that I had not been able to determine the problem through teleconferencing alone, but I had needed to hold private meetings with each member of the Paris executive team to weed out the trouble-maker. It turned out that Gustav Charland, who Ros and I had promoted a couple of months earlier after his stellar job performance, was a better follower than leader. When put in charge of others, he had let the power go to his head and had begun to disrespect and disregard the other members of his team. He had even started out our meeting talking down to me. I had a habit of speaking French with my Paris team because I was fluent in French, and not all of them were as proficient in English as I was in French. Mr. Charland had insisted on answering my questions in English in a rather condescending way, as if I would not be able to understand if he spoke French. When I had questioned him on why he was insisting on speaking English, his response was insulting. Then, I had realized quickly through private conversations with the others that he treated everyone like that, not just me. As a result, I had to let him go and reorganize the leadership structure. Once that was done, my other staff members had seemed satisfied. I marveled at how one person had been able to stir up such a sticking pot of shit, and I was grateful that it had been relatively painless to sort out.

My second day there, after spending the morning making sure everything was squared away in the GEH-Paris office, I had lunch with a young man by the name of Leo Leroy. Although Mia hadn't given me his name, I, of course, had my ways of finding out about the fucker who had broken her heart. I wanted to kick his ass, but I kept what Mia had told me in mind: that she had broken up with him, and that she believed she had broken his heart.

Mr. Leroy surprised me even more than I did him. I had not told him beforehand who I was, preferring instead to make him think that I was a potential investor in his family's restaurant business, since I knew from my research that they had a quite successful chain of restaurants in Paris and the surrounding area. When he found out that I was Mia's brother, he did not stop asking about her, and his tone sounded desperate to hear from her. She, apparently, had not responded to his calls or messages. He also had many questions about Seattle.

Finally, I had to ask, "Why all the questions about Seattle? Your life is here in Paris."

"No," he replied sadly. "My life, my heart, is in Seattle. Your sister is my heart. Now, I am dead."

Holy shit. Was this guy serious? Only a week ago, I would have scoffed at this kid. But now, I totally got it. Mia was to him what Ana was to me. I realized, with a jolt of shock, that if Ana walked out of my life, I would feel dead too, just like this kid. "What are you going to do about it?" I asked him.

He sighed deeply before he looked me in the eye and answered, "What I've already done..." He looked away, out the window of the cafe where we sat, before he returned his gaze to me and continued, "I've told my father that I have to leave. I have to follow my heart. I thought it would break him, because he planned for me to take over our restaurants. It's been his life's work, and he's done very well. Up until I met Mia, I was very happy with this plan. I thought I would have a family, and that we would continue to live here in Paris and run the restaurants after my father retired. But now... Mia cannot imagine being separated from you and the rest of her family. I was angry with her. I thought she chose you over me. She did. But I can't stay angry with her. I have to go to her. If she will still have me."

"How did your father take your news?" I asked him.

"Much better than I expected. My father and I are very close. He knew... he knows that I can't live without her. He was the same way about my mother. She died two years ago. Cancer. Anyway, my dad gets it. He told me I have to go. Even gave me money to live on at first."

Wow! So Leo Leroy was planning to relocate to Seattle, and Mia had no idea because she had refused to talk with him since returning to Seattle. How would she take it? I thought I already knew the answer to that question, after her visit to my office that day. She was clearly still very much in love with him. And I decided then and there, I would do whatever I could to make this happen for her. Her boy had made a good impression on me, and I could see him fitting into our family. I believed that he would do anything to make her happy, which is all I wanted for her.

"So, what are your plans?" I asked him.

"Go to Mia. Beg her to take me back. Make a new life in Seattle. I'm a pastry chef, so I hope to get work there. I will have to work out my immigration status first, before I can legally get a job. Then, work in a restaurant, wherever I can find a job. Long term, I have a dream of running a restaurant with Mia. Well, not really a restaurant, but more like a small cafe. We dreamed about it together, and I believed it would happen, and I still want to make it happen. Mia told me Seattle is famous for coffee, and that there are many small coffee shops, so I'm not sure if my idea will be successful there if there's already too much competition, but maybe... If we can be more than just a coffee shop but not a large restaurant... I know firsthand how much time and effort it takes, how busy my parents were growing up, running our restaurant, and at that time, we only had the one. My father didn't expand until I was at university. Our restaurant chain has been my father's life. I felt neglected at times. I don't want that for my children. I want to be able to take time off to spend with my family."

Those words impressed me even more. Yes, he would do quite well for Mia. And if a small cafe was their dream, I would make it happen, sooner rather than later. There was no reason he needed to work his ass off in whatever restaurant jobs he could find when I had the means to make their dream come true now. It would be my gift to Mia. But first, I needed to make sure that this kid knew what he was talking about, that he had the ability to run a business. So, we spent the next hour talking through his business plan, which I thought had great potential for succeeding in Seattle. By the end of the conversation, I had convinced him to meet me at the airport the next morning and to fly back to Seattle with me. I would surprise my sister, not only with this boy who she clearly was as deeply in love with as he was with her, but also with her dream of a French Cafe. It would take a few months to make the second wish come true for her, but in the meantime, she and Leo could rekindle their relationship and get settled in Seattle.

I told Ana all about Leo Leroy, but I swore her to secrecy. I wanted it to be a surprise for Mia. Ana filled me in on her day as well, just as she had the previous day. She still had not heard a peep from Jack Hyde, but he was being watched both by agents that Ana and I both had hired to tail him, and online by Samantha. Ana also let me know that Isaac was improving, and they expected that he would be able to go home from the hospital in a few days. She seemed somewhat suspicious of Brenda, and I wasn't sure why. Brenda had seemed very candid, but in my experience, submissive women usually were when questioned by Dominant men. If she had an ulterior motive, I had yet to see what it was, but I trusted Ana's instinct, so I knew it would be wise to tread carefully with Brenda. I still needed to go over the background report I'd ordered on her... once I got back to Seattle.

"There's something else I need to ask you," Ana said after we had been talking about Isaac and Brenda for a few minutes. We were still delightfully naked, and I was pleased that Ana seemed unashamed of her nakedness and unconcerned about being on camera for me.

"I'm not sure I like the tone of your voice," I told her, because her tone sounded reluctant, like she was about to give me bad news. "You know you can ask me anything, Ana."

"I know, Christian, but I know you're probably going to overreact," she said bluntly. "Before I say anything, I want you to understand that there have been no security problems at all. Everything is fine here. I am safe, and I would tell you if that were not the case. Do you trust me?"

"Yes, Ana, I trust you, but you're scaring me a little. Tell me."

Ana looked away and took a deep breath before she looked back at me and said, "It's about Leila Williams. Number thirteen."

"What about her, Ana?" I asked cautiously. Why the hell would Ana be asking me about my former sub, especially that particular one?

Ana replied, "What I want to ask you is... how did you come to believe that she was lying to you about the ultrasound? Why did you think it was fake?"

"Because it was," I answered. "I contacted her doctor, and he told me he'd never heard of her. The ultrasound that I showed him belonged to another patient, he said. And I believed the doctor because he was a friend of my mother. She worked with him."

Ana cleared her throat before she quietly said, "Elena was a friend of your mother."

"Ana..." I said with a warning tone, which she ignored.

"And it was unethical of him to give you private information about a patient, even if it had been true. He would have been breaking privacy laws if he had been telling you the truth about the ultrasound. But it was just as unethical for him to lie to you about it."

"What do you mean, 'even if it had been true'?" I asked as calmly as possible, even though I was beginning to feel angry. "Why are you suggesting that Dr. Danforth was lying to me? Why would he do that, Ana?"

She considered that question for a moment. "You said he was friends with your mother," she said. "Is it possible that he was also friends with Elena?"

I could no longer contain my anger, mainly because I didn't know what the hell was going on for her to be asking me these questions. "What is this about, Ana? Tell me what is going on."

"OK, Christian, I will," she said calmly. "I considered waiting until you got back to tell you because I know this is going to freak you out, but too much has happened, and I don't want you to be blindsided when you get back here. But I don't want you to overreact either. I need you to calmly listen to what I'm about to tell you. Can you do that?"

"Damn it, Ana, tell me," I answered angrily. She was talking to me like I was a goddamn child.

Ana paused a moment before she finally told me her story. "Leila Williams contacted me yesterday. Actually, 'contacted' isn't the best way to put it. She sat down at the table in the deli on the corner, where I was having lunch with Sawyer and Prescott. I needed a break from my office, so I took both of them with me. When she sat down, she raised her hands, looked at both Prescott and Sawyer, who she seemed to already know were my security detail, and she told them calmly that she wasn't a security threat and that she only wanted five minutes of my time. She asked them to search her so they could see that she wasn't a danger to me, so they did."

"Goddamn it, Ana, this is why I should have my own CPO on you. They would have known her, or any of my former subs for that matter, and wouldn't have let her get near you."

"Christian, calm down. If you want to hear this story, you're going to have to get a hold of yourself and listen calmly, without interrupting me."

"Fuck!" I muttered under my breath, but Ana heard me.

"I knew you'd react like this," she said, rolling her eyes. "But like I said, I didn't want you to be blindsided when you get back. And yes, I did just roll my eyes at you. What are you going to do about it?"

I knew she was trying to distract me, to calm me. I took a deep, calming breath, ignored her eye-roll, and said, "I'm OK, baby. Just tell me. I'm listening, and I won't interrupt you again."

"OK, but for the record, I seriously doubt any of your security people would have recognized her, and not because she was purposefully trying to disguise herself. Her appearance is... changed, I'm sure, since you knew her. She was wearing a scarf on her head."

"Why was she wearing a scarf if she wasn't trying to disguise herself?" I asked. I was calm now, so Ana didn't seem to mind my interruption.

"It wasn't a disguise. She was... Damn it, how do I tell you this? When Prescott searched her, she looked under the scarf too. Leila was... bald."

"Bald?" I asked. I wasn't sure I heard her correctly.

"Yes, Christian. Bald. No hair. I still didn't know who she was at that point, but both Prescott and Sawyer had searched her, so I felt that talking with her was safe. I could see from how frail she looked that she didn't appear to be a threat."

"Frail?" I asked. Bald and frail? Was Leila sick?

"Yes, Christian, very frail. But I'll get to that. When she saw that I was willing to listen to her, she began by introducing herself. She said that she was Leila Williams and that she was an old acquaintance of yours, and that she needed to get a message to you. She said that over the past two years, she had tried unsuccessfully to talk to you directly, and that time was running out."

"What does that mean, time was running out?" I asked.

"She's sick, Christian, if you haven't guessed it already," Ana explained. "She has stage four breast cancer. She's already had a double mastectomy, but by that time, the cancer had already spread to her lymph nodes. She said it's now in her liver too. She's dying, Christian."

I felt shell shocked. "Ana, are you sure? I mean... she doesn't exactly have the best track record for honesty. Maybe she's lying..."

"She's not lying, Christian. You only had to look at her frail body to know it. You can't fake something so serious. I've seen her chest, Christian. And... I've talked with her oncologist. She asked me to, because she knew you wouldn't trust her. She has given her oncologist permission to talk with you as well, to tell you anything you want to know, to verify her story. And I know him, Christian. Dr. Wayne Vancleeve. He's a volunteer with Doctors Without Borders, and I have known him for a few years now, a very solid guy. He's who I would want if, God forbid, I needed an oncologist. I believe him."

"Holy shit!" I said, and I was quiet for a few moments, trying to digest everything Ana had just told me. "But... why, Ana? Why did Leila talk with you? Why does she want to talk to me? What does she want from me? Is it money? She can't afford the treatment?"

"That's not it, although I now know that she has had serious financial problems since she got sick. But that's not why she contacted me, and she hasn't asked for anything financial. I discovered her money problems through my own investigation, not by her own admission. There's more, Christian. A very important, very urgent reason why she needed to talk to you, especially since she probably only has weeks left. It's been almost a year now since she was diagnosed with stage four cancer, and people usually only live a few months at that point. She's outlived her life expectancy already, according to Wayne. She is living on borrowed time, so to speak, and is desperate to talk with you before she dies."

"Fuck!" I muttered, and I blew out a breath of air. "Ana... I'm sorry for what she's going through, and I'll do whatever I can to ease her suffering. I can pay her medical bills. I'm happy to do so. But... I don't want to talk with her. She's my past, Ana, and I would rather forget her."

Ana looked at me sadly. She just watched me for a few moments before she responded. And when she did, I had the shock of my life. "Christian, you can't forget her. That's not possible now. And when it comes down to it, I don't think you're going to want to." She cleared her throat and... was she wiping tears from her eyes?

"Ana?" I started to ask.

"Christian, the only thing that Leila Williams ever lied to you about, as best I can tell, is the fact that she screwed up her birth control and your condoms. She was deceitful about trying to get pregnant, but not about the actual pregnancy. That ultrasound that she showed you wasn't a fake. It was hers. Dr. Danforth lied to you... I'm not sure why, but I'm going to find out. Leila was pregnant, and she gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She has Leila's large brown eyes, but copper curls and a smile just like yours. I've seen her, Christian. She's very real, and I mean it when I say she is beautiful."

I'm not sure how much time passed before I was able to pick my jaw up off the floor and confirm what I thought I heard Ana just tell me. Even then, I wasn't able to make a complete sentence. "Ana... are you saying...? Did you just say...? Did Leila...? Am I...? Oh, my God!"

"Yes, Christian. You heard me, and I didn't want you to arrive home and walk into my penthouse to be surprised by this little girl who looks just like you. You needed to know what you're coming home to."

I still couldn't put sentences together. "Your penthouse?"

"Yes, Christian," Ana answered calmly. "Tomorrow before you get home, Leila and Christina will be moving in to my penthouse."

"Christina?" I asked dumbly.

"That's right," Ana answered. "Leila named her baby Christina. Christina Rose Williams."

"Rose?" I asked, still sounding just as dumb.

"Apparently, Leila and I... and now Christina, all have the same middle name. Rose."

I was beginning to have trouble breathing, because Ana's words were finally reaching my brain. "Ana... oh my God! Fuck!"

"Christian, breathe," Ana commanded me urgently. "Are you going to pass out? Do I need to call Taylor to come and check on you?"

"No... I... I'm calling him myself." I picked up my phone and called Taylor. "I need you in my room, right now," I told him briskly and then hung up immediately. How the hell did Taylor not know about this? It was his job to know everything about all my former subs. And if he knew, why hadn't he informed me?

"Christian, if Taylor is on his way, you might want to put some clothes on," Ana said. "And we're either ending this call, or I'm getting dressed."

"Get dressed," I ordered her. "I want you to tell Taylor what you just told me." I stood up and put on my sweats, sans boxers.

The next moment, Taylor burst into my room. I could see that my Skype call with Ana was still connected, even though she wasn't on the screen. I'm sure she was in the room, getting dressed. "Sir?" Taylor asked.

"I want you to explain to me why the hell I didn't know about Christina Rose Williams," I told him angrily.

Taylor looked confused. "Who?" he asked.

Ana appeared back on my computer screen, now dressed in a t-shirt and yoga pants. "The baby girl that Leila Williams gave birth to 18 months ago," she explained to Taylor. "Christian's daughter."


	28. Chapter 28: Meanwhile, in Seattle (APOV)

_**Chapter 28: Meanwhile, Back in Seattle (Anastasia's POV)**_

To say that I was surprised to meet Christian's former submissive, Leila Williams, would be the understatement of the year. And then on top of just meeting someone that had known him so intimately, to find out that she had given birth to his child... it just nearly floored me. I wasn't sure how I was going to hold on to my sanity, much less my usual calm composure, once I learned that she hadn't lied to Christian about the ultrasound that she had given him, as he was so sure she had. Christian had a child, and I had no idea how that reality would change him or our relationship. Throughout that day and the next, from the time that I met Leila during my lunch break, up to the time that I worked up the nerve to tell Christian about her, I continued to hear my mother's voice in my head, "Do the right thing, Anastasia. Do the right thing."

When Leila sat down at my table as I was having lunch with Sawyer and Prescott, I never would have guessed who she was. She looked nothing like I would imagine one of Christian's former subs looking, other than her pale complexion. She was so thin I could see her bones protruding through her sallow skin. She certainly appeared too weak to be a submissive. One scene in Christian's playroom would end her, if her appearance was any indication of her stamina. Her head was covered in a scarf, which I thought was odd, unless of course she wore it for religious reasons. Either way, why would she be approaching me? I was immediately suspicious, but before I could speak, and before either Sawyer or Prescott could act, Leila spoke.

"Please, Ms. Steele, I only ask for five minutes of your time, and I swear I am not a threat to you. Your guards can search me to prove that. I mean no harm, I promise." She was looking in my eyes to show her sincerity, but I also saw desperation there, which I considered a red flag. I still didn't know who she was, but I didn't trust her.

"Who are you?" I asked her suspiciously.

"My name is Leila Williams," she answered without hesitation. She opened her purse and handed it to Prescott. "Please search me. My ID is in my wallet there. You can search my body too. I am not a threat. I just want a few minutes of your time, that's all. Then I will leave you alone. You have my word."

I didn't acknowledge that I knew who she was, even though I recognized her name immediately from my conversation with Christian about her. "What do you want, Ms. Williams?" I asked.

"Right now, I just want to tell you my story," she answered. "What I really hope for is your help. But that will be up to you, once you've heard what I have to say."

Once Prescott had looked through Leila's purse and found no weapon, I motioned for her to search Leila's body as well, because I still didn't trust her. I was shocked when Prescott looked under Leila's scarf to see that she was bald. What the hell was that about? When Prescott was done and satisfied that she wasn't a security risk, I asked Leila, "What makes you think that I would be willing to help you with anything, Ms. Williams?"

"Because you're a woman... and from what I know about your business, you care about women... about helping women in desperate situations overcome their circumstances. I know about your charities and scholarships. And more importantly..." she paused a moment, considering her words. "If what I've seen in the media is true, you love him too. Mr. Grey, I mean. I know he doesn't want her, but time is running out, and I don't have anywhere else to go. Even if he doesn't want her, surely he has the resources to do something... to make sure she ends up with a good family who will love her."

Now my hackles were raised, even though I didn't know what the hell she was talking about. But at Christian's name, some protective instinct in me took over. "You asked for five minutes, Ms. Williams. I'll give you two minutes to tell me what the hell you're talking about, but I will warn you ahead of time that if you are trying to use me to get to Mr. Grey, you can forget it."

She took a deep breath to calm herself before she responded. "It's true, I admit it, that I am trying to use you to get a message to him. I know better than to try to get to him directly. I've tried repeatedly in the past two years and never succeeded, and I'm running out of time. You are my only hope of getting this message to him. And like I said, I know he doesn't want her, but he's a humanitarian, for God's sake. He helps children in other countries that he doesn't even know. He doesn't want them to starve, so surely he doesn't want anything like that to happen to his own daughter."

"Wait...what?" I stared at her blankly. Had she just said what I thought she just said?

"You didn't know?" she asked. "I'm sorry... I thought by how you responded to me when I introduced myself that you recognized my name, so I thought he had probably told you about the baby."

I could see that she was being truthful, so I decided to be open with her, to a point. "He told me about you, yes," I admitted. "He told me about how you deceived him with an ultrasound that wasn't real. You tried to make him believe that you were pregnant, but when he checked with the hospital, he learned that you had faked it."

"What!?" she gasped. "Is that what he believed?"

"Yes, that is what he still believes," I answered. "But..." I hesitated before I added, "I think he's grateful to you for opening his eyes to what Mrs. Lincoln was doing... with the videos."

"My biggest regret is taking that video and giving it to her. She was evil. Pure evil. I heard about her death, and I can't say I was sad. Anyway... no, I wasn't lying to Mr. Grey. I admit, I was naive... I believed that he would want me... that he would want her... I was in love with him and thought he would..." Her voice trailed off, and she sighed. But then she continued, "Anyway, it doesn't matter. I wasn't deceitful about it. Not really. Well, I did try to trick him by getting pregnant in the first place, and so I can understand him not trusting me because of that. But none of that matters now. I just need her to be taken care of. I need to find a family who will love her. I know that won't be him. I'm not the naive girl I was two years ago, and I don't have any romantic notions that he's going to suddenly fall in love with his daughter. But I know that he has the resources to find a good family who will love her. That's all I'm asking for. Even if he doesn't want to take any responsibility as her father, he has... You may disagree with me on this, but I believe that he has a moral obligation to at least make sure she's taken care of after I'm gone."

Everything she was saying was boggling my mind, but I worked hard to stay with her. "What do you mean, after you're gone?" I asked.

She looked at me sadly, as if she pitied me, instead of the other way around. "I have breast cancer. Advanced stage. I should be dead already, according to my doctors. But I can't die yet, not until I know my daughter is going to be taken care of."

I stared at her in shock, noticing the dark circles under her eyes. I knew she was telling the truth. "Are you serious?" I asked anyway.

She lifted her scarf so I could see her bald scalp again. "This isn't just a fashion statement. The last round of chemo wasn't that long ago, so my hair hasn't started to grow back yet. But I'm done. It's not working. It's too late. I'm not going to be around much longer. So I really need to get this message to him now. There's no time to waste. Up until this conversation with you, I have honored my non-disclosure agreement with him, and I will still honor it. I know how important his privacy is to him, and I'm not trying to blackmail him or anything. I don't want to hurt him more than I already have. I just want him to take care of her. Find a family to love her. That's all. I realize I was wrong in trying to trap him into fatherhood. He doesn't want to be a father. That is obvious now. She's 18 months old, and he has never even checked on her, even once. But even he can't allow his own flesh and blood to end up in the foster care system, surely. And that is what will happen to her, because I don't have anyone else."

I considered her words for a moment, and everything I had learned about Christian in the past week. "He doesn't know," I told her.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "How can he not know? I told him... and even if he thought I was lying... he's Christian Grey, for Christ's sake. He could have easily found out that I had given birth. It's not like I tried to hide from him. And as concerned as he is about privacy... Do you mean to tell me he hasn't had his goons keeping track of me and all the other women he's had in his life? How could he not know?"

She had a good point. I knew for a fact that Christian kept up with his former submissives. He had told me so. I couldn't answer her question. It didn't make sense that Christian didn't know about the birth of his daughter, but I was certain that he did not. He was completely in the dark about her.

"I'm not sure why he doesn't know about her, but I'm certain that he doesn't know. If he did, he would have taken responsibility. That's the kind of man he is."

She looked skeptical. "Spoken like a woman in love, or at least enamored," she said with a sardonic laugh. Then she looked sober. "But I hope you're right. I need him to take responsibility for her. Like I said, I don't expect him to love her. Although... I'm not sure how anyone could not love her. She's the most adorable baby in the world. But I guess I am partial, being her mother and all. She's my reason for living. She's my everything."

Seeing the tears in Leila's eyes, I felt tears in my own. I knew there was still a possibility that everything she was saying was a farce, but my gut told me that she was telling the truth. Either way, I would need to check out her story, just to make sure, before telling Christian. I knew he was going to freak, and I didn't want it to be over nothing.

"I want to meet her," I told Leila.

"Who?" she asked dumbly. She looked shocked that I seemed to be buying her story.

"Your daughter. Christian's daughter," I answered. "Before I tell him anything, I want to check out your story and make sure it's all true."

"Sure," she agreed quickly. "When?"

"Well, there's no time like the present," I answered. If she was telling the truth, there was no time to lose.

"OK," she answered. "Christina is staying with my sister right now, so I need to be getting back to her anyway. My sister is... not well. She's the only relative I have, but not a good long term solution. I'll leave it at that."

"Just let me check in with my office, and we can be on our way." I texted Hannah to tell her to cancel all of my appointments for the rest of the day.

As we stood up to leave, Leila looked sick, like she was going to faint. "Are you OK?" I asked her.

She smiled sadly. It looked like she was trying to reassure me. "Just give me a minute. I stood up too quickly. It happens sometimes. But I'll be OK."

I nodded to Sawyer, communicating silently with him, for him to assist her to my car. We were in my Rolls Royce today, which we'd been driving more since I now had two security officers instead of one, and the extra room was more comfortable. Prescott drove, and after he helped Leila into the backseat next to me, Sawyer got in the front seat. Leila gave Prescott the address for her sister. Then she reached into her purse and got out a business card, which she handed me.

"I know you're going to want to check out my story," she told me bluntly. "This is my doctor. My oncologist, I mean. He's a good man, and he'll tell you anything you want to know. I have spoken to him and authorized him to answer any questions that you or Mr. Grey want to ask him about me. I even signed paperwork giving him permission to talk to you. So he won't be breaking any privacy laws."

I glanced at the card and recognized the name Dr. Wayne Vancleeve immediately. He had volunteered several times with Doctors Without Borders, a charity that I supported and for which I had even served on the Board of Directors. I often saw him at fundraising dinners. He had even asked me out a few times, and we'd had drinks a couple of times, but never more. He'd wanted to have dinner, and probably a lot more, but I had always been too busy. Or just not interested. He was kind, sociable, and nice enough looking, but I didn't feel any kind of spark of attraction. I respected him professionally though.

"I know your doctor," I told Leila. "You're right, he is a good man. I'll give him a call later, but, Leila, I already believe you."

"I can see that," she replied weakly. She sounded both tired and relieved. "Thank you."

A few minutes later, we pulled up in front of a run-down apartment building in a part of Seattle that I'd never been in. Sawyer and Prescott glanced at each other looking a little nervous before they both got out of the car and opened our doors. Once again, Sawyer assisted Leila. Prescott tailed us, making sure none of the shady people lingering around followed us into the building. I know it didn't escape either of their attention that the lock on the front door appeared to be broken.

We walked up some steps, past an elevator that looked like it hadn't been functional in years, and up two more flights of stairs that smelled like urine and vomit. Holy shit! If Christian's child was really in this building, if he knew about it, he would have a coronary.

"I'm sorry about the smell," Leila apologized, glancing at me in embarrassment. "Like I said earlier... my sister isn't well, and this place is the best she can manage. And I don't have anyone else to leave her with. It's not the life I want for her. That's why I need your help."

"I can see that," I answered numbly.

Leila opened the door to the apartment... which was unlocked, and she walked in, motioning for us to follow her.

"Does this building not have any functioning locks?" I asked, trying not to sound like a snob, but I was really concerned for their security.

Leila looked even more embarrassed, which made me feel like shit for saying anything. "None that would make any difference," she mumbled. But a moment later, her face lit up. "Here she is!" she called out happily.

"Ma-ma!" a sweet voice called out. A head full of copper curls bounced towards us, reaching up to Leila with a laugh. Leila reached down and picked up the little girl, exerting energy that she hadn't seemed to have just a few moments earlier.

"Can you say hello to Mommy's new friends?" Leila cooed at the baby, who looked at me curiously with the biggest brown eyes I'd ever seen. Other than her eyes, which were clearly Leila's, she was the spitting image of Christian. There was no question in my mind about her paternity. Christian would probably still want to do tests, but I knew they would confirm that Leila was telling the truth about the baby.

"What's her name?" I asked.

Leila looked embarrassed again. "Christina Rose Williams," she answered. "I named her after her father. I didn't name him on the birth certificate or give her his last name. I knew he wouldn't want that. But I still wanted her to have a piece of him. I gave her my middle name, Rose."

"Hello, Christina," I said to the baby, determined to stay strong and figure this all out, for Christian's sake. "Aren't you just the cutest little thing ever!"

The baby smiled at me, making her look even more adorable. And I knew in that moment, regardless of what Christian decided, or how he responded to the knowledge of his daughter's existence, I could love this innocent baby. Maybe it was because she was Christian's, but I think there was a part of me that already loved her, in spite of everything.

It was only then that I looked around and noticed more about the apartment that made me cringe. On the wooden coffee table, in front of a battered sofa, was a half-full baby bottle. Next to it was an ashtray full of cigarette butts. The room was open concept, so I could see the kitchen from where I was standing. The sink was full of dirty dishes, and the counter was littered with more dirty dishes, empty take-away boxes... and oh, holy hell, cockroaches. Shit! Was that mouse shit? Oh, my God!

And then my eyes turned back to the lady sitting on the sofa watching TV, who had to be Leila's sister. Leila confirmed that a moment later. "This is my sister, Serena. Serena, this is Ms. Steele."

"Please, call me Ana," I told Leila.

Serena glanced up at me with glassy eyes that never really seemed to focus on me. She grunted a greeting before turning back to the TV. OK, then.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked Leila. "I'd be happy to give you a ride anywhere you need to go."

Leila looked uncomfortable. "Umm... this is... I mean, I know it's not ideal, but there's nowhere else... umm... We're staying here for now," she finally blurted out.

My eyes probably bugged out of my head. No fucking way. There was no way in hell that I was gong to allow Christian's child to stay in this hellhole another night. "No, you're not," I told Leila as politely as I could manage. "You are staying in a hotel tonight, and tomorrow, we will figure something else out."

"No," she argued. "I don't want that. All I want is for you to tell Mr. Grey about her. I want him to find a better place for her to live, to save her from this. But he doesn't owe me anything. And of course, neither do you. Please don't think I'm trying to... Really, I'm OK here. But she's not. I worry about her safety, especially on my bad days. Sometimes, I can't stay awake, and I worry about what might happen to her."

"How long have you been living here?" I asked her.

"Only about two months," she answered. "Mr. Grey was very generous when I was... with him. He gave me jewelry, clothes, even a car. I sold all of them, and it was enough to live on. But my medical expenses... Anyway, I didn't intend to tell you about any of that... I'm not asking for anything for myself. Please believe me."

"I do," I responded. "But I can assure you, there is no way Christian would want you and his child staying here. You may believe that he doesn't want her, but I'm telling you, he doesn't know about her. When he finds out, he will not want to find her living here. Or you either, Leila. You may be someone from his past, but you were important to him."

"You're wrong about that," she argued. "I never mattered to him." She sighed, and then sat down, still holding Christina in her arms. "I'm tired, Ms. Steele. Ana. I don't have the energy to argue with you. What do you want me to do?" She looked up at me, defeated.

"I want you to pack a bag for you and Christina, and then come with me," I answered. "I'll help you."

It only took us about ten minutes to pack up everything they owned. Apparently, Leila had sold most of her clothes, and she had been borrowing her sister's clothes, which were two sizes too large for her. Most of the things we packed were Christina's.

As we started to leave, I asked, "Do you have a car seat?"

"Oh, shit!" Leila responded. "I don't have a car. I sold it. We take public transportation everywhere. I had an infant carseat but got rid of it when I sold my car. Damn it! What are we going to do?"

"Don't worry," I assured her. "We will take care of it."

What are you doing, Anastasia? I thought to myself as I cuddled my boyfriend's baby in my arms as his former submissive snoozed in the car next to me. Thankfully, Sawyer had located a Target just a few blocks away, so we only had to drive a couple of minutes without a carseat for the baby. I didn't give myself a chance to answer my own question; instead, I forced myself to push forward in CEO mode. I had always worked well under stress. In fact, in business, I had always thrived in times of seeming crisis. I had achieved my success because I was able to think clearly and act calmly and quickly under circumstances when most people would panic. This was really no different. If I could manage to avoid emotional overload in business, I could do the same thing now. It was the only way to move forward.

Prescott's eyes nearly bugged out of her head when I passed the baby off to her so I could go shopping in Target. I took Sawyer with me while Prescott stayed in the car with a napping Leila and baby. It only took Luke and me about twenty minutes to find a carseat, a portable crib, blankets, diapers, wipes, a changing pad, a baby bathtub, washcloths, some baby pajamas and a few other outfits for her, the cutest little socks and shoes, baby bathwash, baby lotion, diaper cream, baby bottles, baby formula, about two dozen jars of assorted flavors of baby food (I skipped over the ones that looked like baby diarrhea in a jar), a teething ring, a stuffed bunny, and a few toys. Once I'd picked up everything I thought the baby would need, I also grabbed a few things for Leila: a couple of pairs of jeans, some tops, some underwear and bras, and a couple of pairs of comfy pajamas. I considered getting Leila a few snacks too, but I had no idea what she would like.

When we got back to the car, it appeared that Prescott had warmed up to the baby, who was awake, still sitting in her lap, watching a cartoon on her iPhone. Prescott looked less afraid than earlier, but as soon as we approached, she handed the baby over to me and began to help Sawyer load our purchases into the car. It took them longer to install the carseat than it had to purchase all of the supplies. Sawyer ended up watching a Youtube video on his phone to figure it out. Meanwhile, I sat in the front seat and ignored their muttering, watching the baby as she continued to watch the cartoon on Prescott's phone, and wondering how the hell I was going to tell Christian about her. I knew he was going to shit himself. I wasn't sure whether I should wait until he returned from Paris or tell him right away. I needed to confirm everything first.

With that thought in mind, I called Wayne Vancleeve, Leila's oncologist.

"Ana! I thought I might be hearing from you!" he responded cheerfully when I'd identified myself.

"You know why I'm calling then?" I asked. "Leila Williams?"

"Yes, she explained that you might call to confirm her story. Tragic, really. I wish I could do more for her. Anyway, I'm authorized to tell you anything you want to know about her medical condition. Under normal circumstances, I would never talk about one of my patients, but she was insistent that I talk to you if you call. The same goes for Christian Grey. I think I can guess why, but we don't need to discuss that. Leila seemed to believe that you might question whether or not she's really sick. I can assure you, unfortunately, that she is very sick. Dying, in fact. Actually, it's a miracle she's still alive. I expected her to not make it past six months ago."

"How long have you been treating her?" I asked.

"Since she was diagnosed, almost two years ago. There were complications during her pregnancy that caused her obstetrician to do some tests... and that led her directly to me. Breast cancer. One of the most aggressive types I've seen. She refused treatment while she was pregnant, but after her baby was born, we did a double mastectomy, followed by a couple of rounds of radiation and chemotherapy. But it was just too late."

"OK, thanks, Wayne. You've told me all I need to know," I told him, and then I remembered one more thing. "Wait... how has she been paying her medical bills?"

"Not my area," he answered. "I could check into that, if you need to know."

"Yes, do," I responded. "And if she has unpaid bills, let me know."

"Will do," Wayne answered.

"Wayne, is there any possibility of treatment that might still work for her, that she hasn't tried yet, possibly because she can't afford it?" I asked.

"Ana, I wish I had a better answer. The cancer has been at stage four for about a year now. Normally, anyone at stage four doesn't live past six months. We had hoped that removing her breasts would take care of it, but it had already spread to her lymph nodes. The last ultrasound showed tumors in her liver. I expect the day is soon approaching that she will need to be hospitalized... for what little time she has left."

I sighed deeply. "OK, thank you again, Wayne. I expect you'll be hearing from Christian in a couple of days."

"So is it true, Ana?" Wayne asked. "Are you and Christian Grey... together?"

"Yes, Wayne, we're together," I answered.

Wayne sighed. "Well... then he's a lucky man. I hope he makes you happy, Ana."

"Thanks, Wayne. He does."

I was glad that Wayne didn't ask about our interest in Leila, and that he had explained Leila's condition to me in language that I could easily understand, not using medical jargon that I was unfamiliar with. He was professional, as always. I wondered if he had guessed already that Leila had given birth to Christian's baby. I was sure he had. One look at the baby, and anyone who knew Christian could see the resemblance. I wasn't sure how well Wayne knew Christian, but Grace worked at the same hospital as Wayne, and Christian had donated enough money for a new oncology wing. Wayne had to at least know who Christian was, even if he didn't know him well.

When I ended the call with Wayne, Leila spoke from the backseat behind me. "Ana... You're not paying my medical bills. I can't believe... Seriously, you can't do that."

"I thought you were still sleeping, Leila," I answered, ignoring her words.

"Seriously, Ana. How can you even be considering...? Mr. Grey is your boyfriend, right? I'm your boyfriend's ex... I wasn't even a girlfriend. Not anything, really. But I gave birth to his child. You must hate me. How could you want to help me?"

"I don't hate you, Leila. And you're wrong. You were something to him. You were his submissive."

She laughed bitterly. "Some submissive I was. I used to break the rules just to be punished. I liked pain. I guess it's good that I was a pain slut though... because I've needed to have a high pain tolerance over the past year. But Mr. Grey had no idea just how badly I was breaking the rules. He was so strict about birth control. And he never ever fucked me without a condom." She suddenly caught herself. "I'm sorry... I'm being too crude. All I'm saying is... I betrayed him. In more ways than one. I loved him, and I betrayed him. I deserve everything that's happening to me now. All this punishment. Do you believe in karma, Ana?"

"Yes," I answered. "But I don't believe that's what this is."

"It is," she insisted. "I hurt him, and this is my punishment. I betrayed him with that mother-fucking video that I sold to the devil. I sold my soul to the devil, and this is my punishment. And then I flushed my birth control pills... I knew he was checking to make sure I was taking them. And I poked holes in all his condoms. I thought a baby would change things between us. Well, she certainly did change things between us. I'll never forget the look of anger on his face. Well, first shock. Then horror. Then anger. I was so stupid. So damn stupid. He'd made his demands so clear to me. For Christ's sake, it was all written down in a fucking contract."

"Leila, I think you're being too hard on yourself," I told her.

"No," she replied. "I'm not sure why you're being so nice to me, but you need to stop. I don't deserve your kindness. And if you are right, that Mr. Grey doesn't know about Christina, then I need you to stop being nice to me and let me accept my punishment. I need him to see how well I endure my punishment. Maybe then, he will take care of her. I regret everything I did to him, but I don't regret her. She's the best thing that's ever happened to me. And I need him to see, so he will make sure she's taken care of."

What? I had to pause, to make sure I heard her right before I responded, "Leila, trust me when I tell you that there is no way in hell that Christian is going to agree that you deserve cancer, no matter what you've done. Nobody deserves to be as sick as you are. And when Christian learns about Christina, he is going to take responsibility for her because he's her father, not because you accepted your punishment like a good submissive. You aren't his submissive anymore. He's not going to reward you for suffering with cancer. He'll step up as her father because it's the right thing to do."

"You don't understand, Ana," Leila argued. "Are you his submissive? Do you even know what that means?"

I was not going to go there with her. My relationship with Christian was none of her business. "I understand that he is her father and that you are dying," I answered bluntly.

Leila sighed. "Yes..." she answered. She started to say something else, but stopped herself. "I'm tired, Ana," she finally said. "So fucking tired."

"Finally!" Sawyer called out. The carseat was finally installed properly. I handed Christina back to Leila, who secured her. And then we were off. Leila and I didn't speak again. Her eyes were closed, but I wasn't sure if she was napping again.

Prescott drove this time, to the Fairmont Olympic Hotel, where I had a standing reservation for a two-bedroom suite for visiting business associates. On the drive there, I called Hannah and got her to arrange a nannying service. By the time we got Leila and Christina settled in their suite, with all of the supplies that Sawyer and I had picked up for them, Leila looked completely wiped out. The naps in the car had not been sufficient for her. I could see that she wanted to argue with me again about the cost of the hotel, and then the supplies too after she saw them all, but I didn't allow it.

"When was the last time you had a nice relaxing bath?" I asked her.

She looked at me dumbly. "I'm not sure. Probably not since... I was pregnant. But... I can't, Ana." She looked embarrassed. "I won't be strong enough to pull myself out after I'm done."

I glanced at Prescott and Sawyer, who were both sitting in front of the television with Christina watching a Disney princess movie. Again, I heard my mother's voice in my ear: "Do the right thing, Ana." So I took Leila by the hand and pulled her into the bathroom.

"You're going to relax in the bathtub, and I'm going to help you. Christina is fine, watching a movie with my security. Just relax, Leila. Everything is going to be OK now."

She blinked her eyes, but she wasn't able to stop a few tears from escaping. "Why are you doing this, Ana? You're supposed to hate me."

"Why should I hate you?" I asked cheerfully. "You seem like a nice person."

"I'm not though. I betrayed him."

My God, this chick had a serious complex. Sure, I wasn't thrilled about any of this, but I didn't blame her for any of it. Even how she got pregnant. It had been stupid, immature, and deceitful, but one look at little Christina, and Leila's lapse of judgment was easy to forgive. I wasn't thrilled about the idea of Christina, but I couldn't help but love the innocent little girl who looked just like Christian.

"You need to let go of that and forgive yourself," I told Leila as I started to fill the tub and added some bath oil. "Now come on and let's get you undressed."

"I can't forgive myself. He'll never forgive me. He hates me. He rightfully hates me." Now the tears were streaming down her face.

I didn't think Christian really hated Leila. I wasn't sure he felt anything for her at all. But I didn't tell her that. Instead, I ordered her to lift her arms so I could help her out of her shirt. "Shh... just don't think about any of that. It's all going to work out. You'll see. Just relax, OK?"

She repeated her question, "Why are you doing this, Ana?"

"Because it's the right thing to do," I answered simply. "You've had a very hard day. A hard year."

"A hard life," Leila agreed. She sighed, and then before I knew it, her arms were around me. "Thank you, Ana. Thank you so much!"

It was very awkward to stand in a hotel bathroom with a half naked woman embracing me. There was nothing sexual about Leila's embrace, but still... Awkward! I patted her back, and said, "That's OK. Let's finish getting you undressed and get you in the tub. Don't worry about being strong enough. I'm here to help."

"Will you be strong enough to lift me out of the tub?" she wondered.

She didn't appear to be heavier than a feather, but I didn't tell her that. "If I'm not, I have two very strong security officers in the other room who can help."

Leila didn't respond as she finished getting undressed. I felt a jolt of shock when she removed her bra and I saw her scarred chest where her breasts should have been. She wore a special bra to appear to have breasts. I was also stunned to realize that I could see her bones through her saggy skin. I looked away before she could see me gawking at her, and I helped her into the tub.

"OK, I'm just going to give you a little time to relax. Just call when you are..."

"No!" Leila cried out, sounding frightened. "Don't go! Please... Please stay with me, Ana."

OK, then. "It's OK, Leila. I'm right here. I'll stay if that's what you want."

"Please," she replied. Thankfully, there was a comfy chair in the corner of the room, so I took a seat without speaking. After a couple of minutes of silence, Leila said, "I'm scared, Ana."

"Of the bath?" I asked stupidly. "I can help you out if you want..."

"No, not of the bath," she responded simply, and I realized my stupid mistake. Leila was afraid of dying. What did I say to that? I had never watched anyone die before. My mom and stepdad were snatched from me in their car accident. My grandmother had died in her sleep unexpectedly.

When I couldn't think of anything to say, I decided to distract her. I noticed that she hadn't moved since getting into the tub. I had thought she'd be able to turn the water off herself when it got full enough, but she wasn't budging, and the tub was close to overflowing. So I walked over, turned off the faucet, and sat down on the side of the tub. As I watched her, I realized that she really wasn't able to bathe herself. So I picked up a washcloth, knelt beside the tub, and began to wash her body. At first, she protested, but I ignored her, and soon she quieted down and began to relax. I washed her entire body, including her bald scalp, and she did not resist me again. As I washed her, I began to hum a song that I remembered my grandmother singing to me when she bathed me when I was a child. I couldn't remember the words, which had been in Russian. But the melody was haunting. It often had come to mind over the years when I felt stressed out and needed to feel my grandmother's presence.

Half an hour later, Prescott and I had helped Leila out of the tub, into her pajamas, and into the cushy bed, where she was already sleeping. The nanny, a college student named Josie, had arrived and was helping Christina eat some of the baby food we'd bought her. Josie assured me that she could mix her formula and feed her. I gave her strict orders to take care of Christina through the night while Leila slept. Another nanny would relieve her the next day. I realized during the bath that Leila also needed an around the clock nurse, and I would take care of it immediately.

Later that afternoon, I got a call from Wayne Vancleeve. He confirmed that Leila had some outstanding medical bills. She had been able to pay around $30,000 early on, but now she owed more than $165,000. I instructed Wayne to send the bill to my office, and then I sent Hannah instructions to take care of it when she received it. I also asked him whether Leila qualified for hospice care. Apparently, she had been on hospice, but when she moved in with her sister, she didn't give them her new address. So she had been without any assistance for the past two months. He gave me the information I needed to reenroll Leila in the hospice care.

I called the hospice care facility next and learned that Leila had refused to be admitted into a facility. She had qualified for Medicaid, which would have paid for it, but she refused it. I knew it was because of not having anyone to care for Christina. She had qualified for hospice home visits, but around the time that she moved in with her sister, Medicaid stopped paying for it. I was able to arrange around the clock care for Leila as soon as I told the hospice providers who I was and assured them that I would pay all expenses up front. They would send a nurse to the hotel the next morning.

I spent the next couple of hours trying to decide whether to tell Christian yet or not. I knew he would Skype call me at 7 p.m., and I wanted to be ready to talk with him. I was so conflicted. I was fully aware that as soon as Christian heard the news, he would change all of his plans and schedule his plan for an immediate return home. As much as I wanted to see him, I knew how difficult this was going to be for him to hear and accept.

I still had not figured anything out when he called, so I decided to put it off and just enjoy being with him while I could. I wasn't sure how our relationship was about to change, and I selfishly wanted to hold on to what we had at that moment for as long as I could. I let go of myself more than I ever thought I would, even baring it all on camera for him, and I loved it. I loved watching his lust-filled eyes as he talked me through orgasm after orgasm. Not once did I think of Morton or my horrific high school experience. And I didn't allow myself to think about Leila. I thought only about Christian and me and how well we fit together, how much he seemed to complete me. We shared another first with the Skype sex. I had not expected to get that turned on. At first, I was too grossed out by my period, but Christian assured me that it was natural, that it didn't bother him, and that we would be having lots of period sex in the future. OK, then.

I always slept well after multiple orgasms from Christian, even if he wasn't in the bed with me. The next day, I woke up with a clear mind and firm resolve. This was my reality: Christian had a child that he knew nothing about yet, and Leila could die at any time, leaving behind a child who had nobody to care for her, except for Christian, who knew nothing about her yet. Our relationship was still too new for me to know whether I would be part of that equation or not. Did I want to be? Absolutely yes. I wanted a future with Christian. If that meant helping him raise his daughter, then I was surprisingly OK with that. Between the two of us, we had more resources that the rest of Seattle combined, so we could provide for Christina. Hell, I hadn't even known about her for 24 hours yet, and I was already providing for her fully, even without Christian's knowledge.

I had a lot to figure out before Christian returned the following day, and there was no time to lose. I made a mental list during my workout that morning, and when I sat down to breakfast after my shower, I got to work. Thankfully, it was Saturday, so I didn't need to go into work. I did have a few dozen work emails I needed to answer, and a couple of conference calls later that morning, but nothing urgent.

First, Leila and Christina needed a permanent home. Well... as permanent as it could be, considering Leila's uncertain time table. She needed to be in a comfortable place where she would have around the clock care. She also needed to have access to her baby, even if she was unable to care for her. I wasn't a mother, but I knew instinctively that Leila would suffer more if she were separated from her baby. A hospice facility was not a good choice for her because Christina could not be there with her. But staying in a hotel with her longterm was also not a good solution.

I knew what I needed to do, and I got to work doing it. There wasn't time to find an apartment to rent for them, and I was sleeping in Christian's bed most nights anyway. Even if things changed between us, my penthouse was still large enough to host Lelia and Christina, as well as their nurse and nanny.

I instructed Sawyer to hire a new security officer to watch Leila and Christina. I fully expected that Christian would take over Christina's security once he learned about her. I was more concerned with having them living in my home, especially Leila. I knew she was telling me the truth about everything, but I still could not trust her fully. I needed someone to watch her, as well as all the nurses and nannies who would be coming in and out of my home for the indefinite future. I also asked Sawyer to hire someone to baby-proof my penthouse, and I called Hannah to arrange an interior designer to set up one of the guest rooms with a crib, a rocking chair, and whatever other furniture a baby room needed. I added a bed for the night nanny.

I then called the hospice service and arranged the purchase of a hospital bed and wheelchair. There would be two nurses who would rotate shifts, and a doctor who would visit at least once per week. Leila had stopped all her treatment, so she would not be taking anymore trips to the hospital. It was likely that Leila would die in my home. I wasn't sure how I felt about that, but there was nothing I could do about it. Taking her in was the right thing to do. My grandma would be proud.

And then, Christian. How was I going to tell him? But I knew I had to tell him today. I could not risk his coming home to a surprise encounter with Leila, whom he might not even recognize due to her illness, or to his surprise daughter. He needed time to get used to the idea of her existence before he actually met her.

The day passed quickly, with my usual weekend workload, which had of course increased since I'd lost my COO, in addition to making all the arrangements for Leila and Christina, and having people in and out of my home to set everything up. Leila and Christina would spend one more night at the Fairmont Olympic, and then we would move them here the next day, the same day Christian would be home.

Telling Christian about Leila and Christina that night was everything that I expected it would be. Difficult. Watching the argument that ensued between him and Taylor was even harder. I was afraid for a moment that Christian was going to fire Taylor. In the end, they worked it out, but it was touch or go for several tense minutes.

It turned out that Taylor had known about Christina's existence, but he did not have any evidence that she was Christian's child. He, like Christian, had believed the doctor who had assured Christian that the ultrasound was a fake. Taylor had assumed, when Leila had given birth six months later, that Christian was not the father. He had had his doubts because of the timing of the pregnancy, and he had tried to tell Christian about it. But whenever he had approached Christian with news about Leila, Christian had dismissed him. If it was not an immediate security threat, he didn't want to know anything about her.

Taylor had seen pictures of Christina, taken by his staff who kept tabs on her, but he had not noticed the resemblance between her and Christian. He also had known about Leila's illness. Again, he had tried to tell Christian, but Christian didn't want to hear any news about Leila.

Christian at first blamed Taylor for not trying harder to tell him, but the two finally calmed down. It was surreal listening in on their argument as I was still connected via Skype. Before I had a chance to fill them in on all of the arrangements I had made for them, Christian had told me that they were on their way and had disconnected the call.

I drifted off to sleep that night wondering how things were about to change between Christian and me... and wishing that we had more time to just be us.


	29. Chapter 29: I'm your daddy (CPOV)

**Chapter 29: Meeting Christina (Christian's POV)**

"Fuck!" I yelled at no one in particular as I threw Taylor's phone back at him. He was sitting across from me on my plane. We had been in the air for a couple of hours. "How the hell didn't you know? Look at her! She looks just like..." I couldn't finish my sentence.

"Just like you, sir. Yes, I see that. But this photo is more recent. The one I saw of her a year ago didn't look as much... She was still bald, sir. Big brown eyes. It was hard to see any resemblance then. The one I saw six months ago... she was wearing a hat. I still didn't see it. I didn't know she had your hair color."

"You should have told me, Taylor," I said. "You knew she'd told me she was pregnant. I didn't believe her. Then, you knew she gave birth six months later, and you didn't inform me."

"It wasn't an immediate security risk, sir," Taylor insisted.

"HOW THE HELL WAS IT NOT A SECURITY RISK?!" I screamed. Then, through my teeth, I spat out, "I have a daughter that I knew nothing about. Leila could have sold the story, for fuck's sake. And this baby... my child... could have been in danger, and I DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING KNOW SHE EXISTED!"

Taylor sighed. "Yes, sir. I fucked up. I should have forced you to listen to me when I tried to tell you."

"How long have you known that Leila was sick?" I asked him accusingly.

Taylor answered, "Since shortly after the baby was born. Leila had a double mastectomy. That's when we learned about her cancer. I had a guy tailing her when she went in for her treatments. Bruce. He's the one who sent this updated photo when I asked for it last night. He reports to me about her every six months. He's assigned to numbers 11 through 15. You have two other details assigned to the other ten. They all report to me every six months on each woman."

I sure as hell didn't want to ask the next question, but I had to know. "How many of them have children?"

"A few, sir." He stopped and considered the question for a moment. "Four, not counting Ms. Williams. None of them coincide with the time they were with you. You could not be the father to any of their children."

"You're sure?" I asked.

"Absolutely certain. Cassandra Adams is married now and has a three year old child. It's been six years since you were with her. Amy Wren gave birth five years ago. You were with her seven years ago. Elle Grathberg and Cherry Rhodes both gave birth less than a year ago. It has been more than three that you were with either of them."

"Well, thank fuck for that. But if you know all these details off the top of your head, why the hell didn't you know that I had a child out there?" I accused him again.

Taylor breathed out an exasperated sigh. He was obviously getting tired of my questioning. Well too fucking bad. He should have told me. Finally, Taylor answered me calmly, "I suspected she was yours, sir. Call it a gut instinct. When Dr. Danforth told you the ultrasound was fake, I, like you, at first assumed that she wasn't really pregnant. When it turned out she was, I assumed she'd lied about it being yours. At that point, I tried to tell you about it, but your exact words were, 'If my life is not in danger, I don't want to fucking know about it.' I didn't have any proof, and there was still every possibility that she had been seeing someone else. But I doubted she had. I did try repeatedly to tell you, but you were adamant about not wanting to hear about her."

I remembered all the times he had tried to bring up her name, and I knew he was right. But fuck, if I had known! A kid. Shit!

I decided to stop blaming Taylor somewhere over the Atlantic, and the rest of the plane ride was quiet. Leo had been able to make the flight in spite of our early departure, and I let him have the bedroom. At least someone could get some sleep. I knew he'd need it to be ready to talk to Mia.

But Mia and Leo were the least of my concerns at the moment. I had a child, and Ana had been the one to tell me. My beautiful, amazing Ana... how was she ever going to accept this? She didn't want to be a parent any more than I did, at least not right now, and there was no reason why she would need to. I was going to lose her. I knew it, in my gut. Why would she stay with me now? Every time that thought entered my mind, I almost had a panic attack. What would I do if she left me? How would I possibly survive? I needed her like I needed the air I breathed. I couldn't even fucking sleep without her.

I had never felt so afraid to enter my own home, not knowing what to expect, when I arrived home early Sunday morning. Due to our early departure and to the time change, it was so early that Ana was still sleeping, and I was happy to find her curled up in my bed, hugging my pillow. Without wasting any time, I stripped and crawled into the bed with her, snuggling close to her, breathing in her apple vanilla scent, and hoping beyond hope that she would still be there when I opened my eyes again.

A few hours later, I got my wish when I opened my eyes to see bright blue eyes staring back at me. I wasn't sure what I expected to see there, but more than anything, I saw worry.

She was the first to speak, after she put her laptop and phone on the bedside table. She must have been working in bed. "Be honest, Christian. Until you got home this morning, when was the last time you slept?"

"You know I don't sleep well without you," I responded. I glanced at the clock next to the bed and was shocked to see that it was almost noon. "Damn, is that the correct time?"

"It is," she replied. "How do you feel? Well rested?"

Was she really asking me how I felt? I wanted to make a smart ass remark about her not being fucking Flynn, but more than anything, I just wanted to feel her in my arms. "Come here, baby," I said.

She responded by stripping off her clothes and straddling me in the bed. "Have I told you today that I love you?" she asked.

"Not today. But even if you had, I never get tired of hearing it." I palmed her breasts, squeezed them, and then pinched her nipples.

"I love you, Christian Grey," she said, and then she kissed me tenderly. I returned the kiss, pouring everything I felt for her into it.

We made sweet vanilla love, and then we showered together. I knew that Ana was trying to reassure me that she was here, and that everything was going to be OK, but I wasn't sure I believed her. I was so worried about what was to come. We both avoided mentioning Leila or the baby, but I knew one of us had to bring it up eventually.

After our shower, as we got dressed, Ana said, "I wish you'd stop looking at me like that."

"Like what?" I asked.

"Like you're scared shitless that I'm going to disappear any minute," she answered.

Again, I wanted to make a joke, but I couldn't. "Are you?" I asked her.

"Absolutely not," she answered without a moment's hesitation. "I am here, Christian. You have to kick me out yourself to get rid of me."

"Well that's never going to happen," I told her.

"Well then stop worrying," she replied.

"How can you say that?" I asked her. "Ana... I remember clearly you telling me that you didn't want to have kids. And apparently, I have this kid I didn't know about."

"We will figure it out," she promised me. "I'm here, Christian. I'm not going anywhere. I'll help you figure it out. I WANT to help you figure it out."

"How, Ana?" I asked her, sounding as hopeless as I felt. "I can't be a fucking father. I mean, look at me. Fifty shades of fucked up. How is this kid ever going to not turn out even more fucked up than I am?"

She just looked at me for a moment before she answered. "I don't believe that, Christian. You are an amazing man. A brilliant CEO. An attentive boyfriend slash Dom. And you're going to be a wonderful father. I know you will. And besides, you're not going to be alone. As long as you'll have me, I'll be there with you. I have no idea what kind of mother I'll be, and I'm making a lot of assumptions, seeing as how we've only been together a week. But if you want me here, then we'll figure it out together. Between the two of us, this child will never want for anything."

I couldn't help but feel shocked by what I was hearing. "Ana, are you real?" I asked her in awe. "Aren't you even a little angry at me? How can you be so accepting?"

"Angry at you, no, Christian, I'm not. I believed you when you told me you'd never fucked without a condom until we did. How were you to know that Leila poked holes in them? And I'm sure you believed she was on the pill. I know how much of a shock this is to you, so no, I can't be angry with you about it. I wanted to be angry with Leila and even at the baby, but I couldn't do that either. Christina is an innocent and precious little girl, and I already feel something for her, probably because she looks so much like you. And Leila really screwed up when she intentionally got pregnant. There's no doubt that she was trying to entrap you. But when I saw how sick and desperate she was... I couldn't be angry with her. She believes that she is being punished."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Leila believes that her cancer is punishment for betraying you. She's still beating herself up for the Elena thing too. She thinks she deserves cancer because of what she did to you."

"That's ridiculous!" I said. Nobody deserves cancer, no matter what they've done.

"She's suffered a lot, Christian, and I believe it has affected her mentally. She believes that you'll be more likely to take care of Christina if you see how well she has accepted her punishment."

"What!?"

"And Christian..." Ana continued, "Leila thinks you will find another family to love Christina. She doesn't believe you want her. She doesn't understand that you didn't know about her. In her mind, she gave you the ultrasound, and even if you didn't believe her at the time, you're Christian Grey. You can find out anything you want to."

"Fuck!" I exclaimed. "Taylor tried to tell me... Ana, there's no way in hell I'm going to let someone else raise... Wait. Is that what you think I should do? We both know what a fucked up father I'm going to be. Should I get someone else to..."

Ana stopped me with a hand over my mouth. "Don't you even dare finish that sentence," she said. "I told you I'm here for the long haul, right? But if you reject that little girl, I'm going to have a hard time following through with that promise."

I kissed her hand before I replied, "I hadn't even considered it until you mentioned it. She's mine. I know that even without a paternity test. There's no way I can give her to someone else. I just don't know... if I'd had the usual nine months to prepare for it, maybe I could... Ana, how the hell do I do this?

"Step by step. The first step right now is to go get some breakfast. Or lunch, for some of us."

Over breakfast, Ana filled me in on all that she had arranged for Leila, from nannies to nurses to baby-proofing her penthouse. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but all the details she had handled shocked the hell out of me.

"Not that I'm complaining, but why did you do all that?" I asked her.

She hesitated before she answered. "When I saw the baby, I knew she was yours. My gut already told me that Leila was telling me the truth, but the baby confirmed it all. She is mini-you. And I love you, Christian, so there's a part of me that already loves her, because she is a part of you. And Christian, I'm glad you didn't see where they were living. You would have shit yourself. There's no way in hell I was going to allow your child to spend another night there."

"Was she in danger?" I had to ask.

"Damn straight she was in danger," Ana answered angrily, but I knew she wasn't angry with me. "The apartment building didn't have any working locks, and it was infested with cockroaches and mice. Leila's sister was stoned out of her mind, and Leila left Christina with her when she came to meet me. Even when she's there, Leila is not able to watch Christina properly because she's so sick. So, basically, Christina was living in squalor, often unsupervised. I know I'm being blunt, but these are the hard cold facts. I couldn't let her stay there."

I'm sure my face had gone pale. "Why would Leila have allowed their living situation to have gotten so bad?"

Ana looked at me incredulously. "Christian, she's dying. By all accounts, she should already be dead. And she hasn't been able to work for two years. She has lived off all the gifts you gave her when she was your sub. She sold her car and jewelry you gave her, and when that was gone, she sold her clothes. She's been doing the best she can. And I have no doubt that she loves her baby. In fact, I'm sure Christina is the only reason she's still alive. I think that once she knows Christina is safe and cared for, Leila won't be with us much longer."

"Holy fuck, I wish I'd known," I muttered.

"Leila said she's been trying to contact you for two years, never with any success. That's why she found me. One of the first things I noticed about her was the desperation in her eyes."

"I always kept her away. But I had no idea about the baby. If I'd known..." I would have been angry as hell, but I would have manned up.

"I know, Christian. I assured Leila that you don't know about Christina. She didn't know you were told the ultrasound was a fake. She thought you simply didn't want to have anything to do with your daughter."

"So I guess that explains why she thinks I would give my child to someone else to raise."

"Yes," Ana confirmed. "She thinks you knew about her and didn't want her. Of course she thinks you want to give her up. So, are you sure you want to keep her?"

"Of course," I answered. "Besides... even if I wasn't sure, you seem pretty sure."

"Yes, I am," Ana agreed. "I'm not sure how it happened. I was already thinking about motherhood even before this happened, but I thought it was a long time in the future. I just realized, after the past few days with you... I want that, with you. I wouldn't have chosen to do it so quickly though. We really need more time, just the two of us. But there's no doubt in my mind that we can make it work."

On that note, Gail entered through the door to Ana's penthouse. "Mr. Grey, welcome home!" she called out.

"Thank you, Gail," I answered.

"I see you've had lunch. Can I get you anything else, sir?" she asked.

"I'm fine, thanks," I answered.

Ana asked, "How are things over at my place? Is everyone settled?"

"Yes, and Leila has just had lunch. I took some of my chicken soup over. The nurse said it's the most she's seen her eat."

"Leila is in Ana's penthouse?" I asked. "Right now?"

Ana answered, "Yes, they both are. I told you, remember, that they'd be here when you got home. You just got home sooner than I expected. But while you were sleeping this morning, I had Sawyer and Prescott move them in."

I realized that the time had come to meet my daughter, and to confront her mother, and once again, I had to push back the panic attack I felt. "Are they awake?" I asked Gail.

"Ms. Williams is awake," Gail answered. "I just left her in Ana's living room with her nurse. The baby just went down for a nap a few minutes ago."

I looked at Ana and said, "I think it's time that I have a conversation with Leila."

Ana reminded me, "Yes, seeing as how she's been trying to have a conversation with you for two years now."

"I realize that," I told her. I held my hand out for her to take. "Will you come with me?"

"Of course I will," Ana answered, putting her hand in mine. "And Christian... remember, she's sick. She will look... different than you remember her. And she's very frail, so... just be gentle with her, OK?"

If it were possible, I fell deeper in love with Ana in that moment. There she was being protective of my former sub, who had just turned our world upside down.

I took Ana's hand, and we went together into her penthouse. As we approached the living room, I heard two women talking. I recognized Leila's voice immediately. They must have heard our footsteps because they grew quiet as we approached.

When I saw her, I wouldn't have recognized her if I hadn't known who she was already. Ana had told me that she was bald, and she had warned me that her appearance was changed, but I still has not prepared. She had lost weight. A fucking lot of weight. Even the color of her skin was different, much more pale than before.

When she saw me, her eyes widened, and then she immediately looked away, grabbed a scarf from the sofa, and wrapped it around her head. She didn't speak.

"I'm sorry, Leila," Ana said kindly. "I should have given you some warning that we were coming over."

"It's OK." Leila answered quietly. She still didn't look at me or acknowledge me.

I sat down on the sofa next to her, glanced at Ana to make sure she was OK, and then spoke as gently as I could, "Look at me, Leila."

She looked in my direction, but she still could not look in my eyes. And still she didn't speak. She was trembling a little.

"Leila, I'm not angry with you," I told her. "You can relax. We need to talk."

Ana spoke to the nurse. "Monica, would you mind giving us a few minutes? Feel free to go to the media room and watch TV for a while. I'll call you if we need you, or when we're finished."

"Sure, no problem," Nurse Monica replied and left the room.

Leila still did not speak, and she was still trembling. Ana came and took Nurse Monica's place on the sofa, on the other side of Leila. Ana picked up Leila's hand, rubbed it, and held it in hers. "Don't be afraid, Leila. Christian isn't angry. He is ready to talk with you. Would you like me to stay, or would it be better for me to go...?"

Neither Leila or I let Ana finish her question. "Stay," we both said at the same time.

I watched as Leila squeezed Ana's hand, and blinked a few times, obviously trying hard not to cry. Shit! I'd never been able to deal with the waterworks. But Ana said I had to be gentle. How the fuck was I going to do this?

"I'm sorry, Sir," Leila said softly.

"Leila, let's clear a few things up before we start talking, OK?" I said. "First of all, you never need to refer to me as Sir again. Call me Christian."

She looked me in the eye for the first time, and I saw the shock in hers. "You want me to call you Christian, Sir?" she asked incredulously.

I smiled as kindly as I could. "Yes, and I don't want you to call me Sir. I'm not your Dom, Leila. You don't need to submit to me ever again. We're equals."

Now she looked confused. "Why are you being so nice, Sir? This is not at all how I expected this conversation to go."

I laughed sardonically. "I'm sure it's not, considering the past. But let's start over, if that's OK."

"Of course, Sir," Leila replied. "Whatever you..."

"No, Leila, that won't do," I interrupted. "I've wronged you. I should have known about the baby. I didn't. If I had known about her, and if I'd known about your illness, you would have never gotten to the place you are now. I am sorry. Can you forgive me?"

Leila stared at me in shock, her mouth hanging open. Finally, she spoke. "I'm sorry, Sir, I must be dreaming. This can't be really happening. I thought you just... Did you really just...?"

"Apologize and ask for your forgiveness?" I asked. "Yes, I did."

Now she couldn't control the tears, and Ana handed her a box of tissues. Finally, Leila was able to speak, through her tears. "I can't believe you're asking me to forgive you. After all I did. Sir, I betrayed you. Have you forgotten? I videoed us, and sold the video to that evil woman. And besides that, I knew you didn't want children. I knew it. But I was so convinced that you would change your mind..."

"Leila," I interrupted her. "What's done is done. We both behaved badly. So how about this. I will forgive you if you will forgive me."

"Really, Sir?" she asked incredulously.

"Really, and stop calling me fucking Sir."

"Yes, Si... OK," she corrected herself quickly.

"OK, so can we start from the beginning? When you came to me that day after I'd ended our contract and showed me the ultrasound, I told you that I would take responsibility if the child was mine. But when I checked with the doctor, he assured me that the ultrasound that I showed you was not even yours. It was another patient's. He claimed that you were his patient and that you were not pregnant."

"He lied to you," Leila whispered, clearly shocked.

"Yes, I realize that now," I agreed. "Any idea why he would do that?"

Leila considered my question for a moment. "Shit!" she cried out finally. "It was her. The evil bitch! I remember now seeing her talking to Dr. Danforth on one occasion when I'd gone for an appointment with him. I remember being surprised to see her there, but she pretended she didn't know me. They knew each other. But I never told her I was pregnant."

"But I did," I admitted. "I thought she was my friend. You are the one I have to thank for revealing the truth about her. But not until I had already let the cat out of the bag about the ultrasound."

"But I still don't understand," Leila said. "You followed up with me, surely. Didn't anyone tell you that I had given birth?"

"Taylor tried to," I admitted. "I didn't want to hear anything about you. It's my fault for not allowing him to tell me."

"So you didn't know I was sick either?" Leila asked.

"No, Leila. I didn't know anything about you until yesterday when Ana told me. I told Taylor not to tell me anything unless it was a direct security threat to my life."

"Wow," Leila breathed, and then she said in barely more than a whisper. "You must have really hated me."

"I didn't hate you. I don't hate you. Don't take it personally, Leila. I was a selfish fucked-up son of a bitch. It's why I asked for your forgiveness from the start."

Leila was quiet for a moment. "I hope you mean that, for Christina's sake," she finally said.

"Leila, even if I did hate you, which I don't, I would never take it out on our child," I told her.

She looked at me in shock again. "You just called her 'our child,'" she said.

"Well, she is our child, isn't she?" I asked rhetorically. "I've seen her picture. Taylor showed me on the flight home last night. She looks like me."

"Yes, Sir... I mean, yes. She's yours. I totally understand if you want to have a paternity test before... before you do whatever you plan to do."

I replied, "Leila, first of all, if I have a paternity test, it will be because my lawyers insist on it, not because I doubt she's mine. And second of all, what I plan to do is be a father to my child."

Once again, I'd managed to shock her. "You want to... you want to raise her yourself?" she asked incredulously. "But... I didn't think you wanted... Are you serious?"

"I'm very serious," I answered. "Ana told me what you were thinking, that you wanted me to find a family for her. I realize that you thought I knew about her and didn't want her. The truth is that I didn't know about her and I do want her. You are correct, I didn't want to be a father. But now that I am, there's no way in fucking hell I'm letting anyone else raise my child."

Leila still looked shellshocked. "Well... OK, then. I just need to make sure... I need to know that she's OK. That she will be OK. That you will be OK with her."

"You need to know that she will be loved?" Ana jumped in.

"Yes, and wanted. I don't want her to grow up thinking that she was a mistake. A horrible mistake that her dead mother made."

"Leila, you have my word," Ana promised. "As long as Christian and I are together, I will care for Christina as if she were my own child."

"And Ana and I will be together for as long as she will have me. Either way, Christina will never be treated like a mistake. I promise you that, as her father."

Leila turned towards Ana and said, "It's not enough for me. Thank you, Ana, for promising to care for her 'as if she were your own,'" she moved her fingers like quotation marks as she spoke. "It means the world to me. But I want something more from you. I know I have no right to ask you, but your kindness over the past two days has given me courage."

Ana swallowed, as if she knew what Leila was about to ask, and I had a pretty good idea myself. "Go ahead and ask me, Leila," Ana said. She was blinking her eyes as if she were trying hard not to cry.

"I want you to adopt her," Leila said. "I don't want you to love her as if she were your own. I want you to love her because she is your own. I know it won't be the same as the children you will hopefully give birth to in the future, but I hope that you..."

"Stop, Leila. I will do it," Ana said. Now they both had tears streaming down their faces, and I'll be damned if I didn't have to blink back a few myself.

"You will?" Leila asked hopefully.

"Yes," Ana said. "And Leila... you need to understand, adoption is something I feel strongly about. If I adopt Christina, I will love her as much as I will love any child I give birth to."

"That is exactly what I hope for," Leila said.

"Well, it's settled then," I said. "I will talk to Dad about it. I'm sure he knows a good adoption attorney that he can put us in touch with. And another thing... I want to change her last name to Grey, and I want to get my name added to her birth certificate."

"Steele-Grey," Ana corrected.

"What?" I asked, because I truly didn't understand her.

"Christina's last name should be changed to Steele-Grey. Hyphenated," Ana explained. "I'm sure the adoption attorney can help us with that."

"Ana, why the fuck would I want to hyphenate my child's name? She's a Grey."

"Our child, Christian," Ana corrected. "When I adopt her, as Leila requested, she will be OURS. So she should have both of our names."

"But I'm the father," I reminded her.

"Yes, and we live in the twenty-first century," Ana reminded me.

"Yes, and children in our culture still take their father's names, even in the twenty-first century," I insisted.

"Christian," Ana started to say more, but after glancing at Leila, she changed her mind. "We can continue this conversation another time. I think Leila is getting tired."

Leila agreed, "To be honest, this conversation has taken a lot out of me. I think I need to go lie down."

"I'll go help you, and I'll make sure Monica knows where you are." Ana turned to me and said, "Christian, if you're thirsty, you can help yourself to whatever is in the fridge in the kitchen, or there's some white wine chilling in cooler under the wet bar over there," she pointed to the corner of the room. "I will be back shortly."

A few minutes later, I had poured a glass of wine for each of us when Ana returned with what I can only describe as a bundle of bright copper curls. When she put her down, the baby started toddling towards me, no doubt trying to get to the glasses of wine on the table in front of me. I picked the glasses up and stood up quickly, apparently frightening her, because she burst out crying.

"It's OK," Ana calmed her as she picked her up. "Don't cry, sweetheart. You're OK." She patted her on the back as she continued to soothe her.

I quickly put the glasses on the wet bar out of the baby's reach. Then I walked back over to Ana. "You must be Christina," I said to the baby, as I patted her back, like Ana had been doing. I looked in Ana's eyes and tried to swallow back all the fear I was feeling. "I am happy to meet you," I told the baby. "I'm your daddy."

Ana had already gotten her to stop crying, but then I was shocked when the baby not only laughed at me, but she reached her arms towards me. I glanced at Ana again, feeling panicked. Could I hold this baby? Would it hurt? But she was my child, my own flesh and blood, and I had just promised to be a father to her.

"Come here, precious girl," I told her. "It's time for your daddy to hold you."


	30. Chapter 30: Catching Up with Kate (APOV)

Chapter 30:

"Kate!" I called out to my best friend, who was joining me for lunch. "It feels like I haven't seen you in a month!" And it did, even though it hadn't been much more than a week.

It was Thursday, and Christian had been home from Paris for four days. We had spent that time bonding with Christina and with each other, when we weren't working. The first time Christian held her, we'd both shed some tears, though we tried to hold back so we wouldn't upset her. Christian had been amazed that he could hold her, and that her touch didn't hurt him. I hadn't understood until that day when Brenda had fainted in his arms how much it hurt him when other people touched him, especially his chest. For some reason, I could touch him, and now so could Christina. And now, whenever she was around, in the early evenings after we'd returned from work, before she went to bed, Christian wanted to hold her constantly. Luckily for him, Christina liked to snuggle and take her bottle before going to bed each night, and Christian had been the one to hold her and feed her for the past four nights. I was amazed at how quickly he had taken to fatherhood. I would have never expected that from him.

I had also found out from Christian that Mia's boyfriend from Paris had returned with him, and that they had reunited. It was a story I was looking forward to hearing from Mia, but I understood from Christian that Leo had a plan to start a small French cafe that the two of them would run. Christian was going to help them with the start-up costs, and I was also interested in investing in it.

Isaac was still in the hospital but was expected to go home today. Christian had talked with Brenda again, and he had something up his sleeve, but we hadn't had time to discuss it. When he explained more about the conversation he'd had with her, when she'd been so forthcoming, I wasn't quite as suspicious as I had been before. Apparently, openness in communicating was a Dom/sub thing, and since I wasn't really a sub outside of the playroom, I "wouldn't understand." I wasn't sure that I totally bought it, but I knew that time would reveal all things. I also knew that Christian was walking carefully with Brenda now that I had expressed my doubts, because he trusted my hunches as much as I did his.

We still hadn't heard anything from Hyde, but I was getting increasingly worried. I had mentioned to Christian a couple of times that I thought he should at least consider the idea of making his past, at least small parts of it, public, just to get ahead of it before the shit hit the fan. I knew how damaging those videos were going to be once Hyde released them, and there was no question that Hyde was going to release them, it was only a matter of time. Christian wouldn't hear me either time that I brought it up, but I felt like I might be breaking him down enough to at least consider it.

Meanwhile, I had found someone to manage the salons, and I had already set the plans into motion to rebrand as Ismintis Beauty with a grand opening a month from now. The advertisements would go out in two weeks. My new manager, Franco, was a delightfully gay man with a fake Italian accent. He was funny and boisterous, but also a very hard worker who had worked briefly with Elena, so he understood the business when she had been in charge. He also had been one of my classmates in my MBA program, so I already knew he had a good business sense, and that his dream was to run a line of beauty salons. Turns out, I had the chance to make his dream come true. That might be part of the reason that we'd bonded so quickly.

I'd also been keeping up with Kate via text messages, but I was really looking forward to this lunch with her. I had been longing to talk with her in person, to fill her in on everything that had happened with me and Christian, and to find out what was really going on with her and Elliot. Finally, I had cleared my schedule for a long lunch break today just so I could meet Kate. We were at the Zig Zag Cafe, sitting at the very table where I had fallen in love with Christian.

"Ana! Oh my God! So much has happened!" Kate cried. "I've been dying to fill you in, but some things are just better said in person than on the phone."

"I know, Kate, I agree. There's so much I have to tell you," I said.

"OK, me first!" Kate said excitedly. "I want you to be the first to know. Well, besides Elliot. And Chad. And Leona."

I laughed at her. "What are you talking about, Kate?" I asked.

"We're going to have a formal collaring ceremony. Two weeks from tomorrow. Our one month anniversary. At Chad's at the same party where we met. You and Christian have to come, Ana. You absolutely have to be there."

I felt shocked, but then not. I knew how serious they had become from the start, so this shouldn't come as a surprise. I knew that in the BDSM world, collaring was taken very seriously. A public formal collaring ceremony was akin to a wedding. Kate and Elliot were making a serious commitment to each other.

"Kate, you know I have to ask Christian," I said, "but I think that I can tentatively tell you that we wouldn't miss it for the world. When we talked about it afterwards, we weren't sure we wanted to attend any more play parties, but this is different. It's a special occasion. I agree, we have to be there. I just need to convince Christian."

Kate smiled happily. "I don't think Christian will take much convincing. It is Elliot, after all. And Ana... Elliot is going to propose to me that night too."

"Really!?" I felt surprised again, but not much. I already knew he wanted to marry her; he had told both Christian and me. But this was happening so quickly. But I understood better than anyone what it was like to be in a serious relationship, and to know where I wanted it to go, after only a few days. It was unusual, but it was real. "Just out of curiosity, Kate, why is Elliot the one proposing? Why aren't you proposing to him instead? After all, you're the Domme."

Kate smiled at me, knowingly. "He asked me how I wanted it. And that's what I want, Ana. Right after I claim his ass in front of everyone, I want him to kneel in front of me... on both knees, not just one... and ask for my hand. He already has the ring. He won't show me, but I know I'm going to love it. I love him, Ana. I love him so fucking much."

"I'm so happy for you, Kate. For both of you." I smiled at her, feeling the happiness radiating off her.

"What about you, Ana?" Kate asked. "When are you and the great Christian Grey going to tie the knot?"

"Hush, Kate, not so loud," I shushed her. "If you recall, this very cafe is where the last media fiasco started. And to answer your question, we haven't talked about it. I'm not sure if we're going to 'tie the knot,' as you say. Although, Christian is actually pretty good at tying knots." I smiled mischievously at her.

She raised her eyebrows curiously. "Is Christian into Shibari? Or Kinbaku?"

I looked at her blankly. "I don't know what that is, so I'm not sure."

"Japanese rope bondage. It's very artistic. He'd tie you up with thin rope, in really intricate patterns all over your body. Very erotic and beautiful. And he'd suspend you and fuck you like that."

"Holy shit, I'm getting aroused just thinking about it," I whispered. "We've done suspension, but not like that." I didn't want to go into detail about our first scene and how I'd safe worded.

"If you're into suspension and rope bondage, you'd like it. I ask because Chad has a friend whose been studying Shibari for the past year, and he's going to be there at our collaring. Christian should meet him. He's staying at Chad's place for the next month or two. Name is Kentaro Fukushima. Goes by Ken. He's Japanese American, and he spent the past year with distant relatives in Japan learning from the experts. Elliot and I had dinner with him and his sub a couple of nights ago. We're going to play with them this weekend."

"You're going to play with them... together?" I asked, remembering what Elliot had mentioned about Kate and him playing with another couple. I tried to get the image of Kate going down on another woman out of my mind, but I just couldn't help it.

Kate smirked at me. "I didn't expect to like it so much," she said, reading my mind. "I agreed to it because I knew Elliot wanted it, and I wanted to make him happy. But, Ana, I seriously think I might be bi."

I suddenly felt very uncomfortable. "Kate, I really don't want to think of you like that," I said.

"Ana, relax. I don't think of you like that either. Don't get me wrong, watching you and Christian at the play party was seriously hot, and I want to watch you again. I can admire your sexiness without wanting to fuck you. Seriously, I don't want to fuck you. I think Christian is hot as fuck too, but I don't want to fuck him either. You're like my sister, and Christian is Elliot's brother, so he's like a brother to me too. Fucking either one of you would be like fucking Ethan. Just... oooh. I wish that thought hadn't entered my mind. Disgusting."

I wrinkled my nose in disgust. "Yeah, Ethan is like a brother to me too, so yeah, that's disgusting. Thanks for that mental picture, Kate," I said sarcastically. I'd gotten to know Ethan well when Kate and I had been at Stanford. He was a great guy, but not someone I could ever see myself with.

"Anyway, Ken is seriously hot. And so is his sub, Raina. I keep referring to her as his sub, but she's actually his slave. Like they're in a full-time, TPE, lifelong thing, more extreme than anything I've ever witnessed. I don't think I could do the slave thing. I really want Elliot to be his own man. I want him to make his own decisions, just to include me in it. I only want to be in charge of him when we play. Does that make sense?"

"Totally," I answered. "But I'm confused. I was under the impression that you were 24/7 TPE with Elliot."

"We are, but it's only our personal lives, especially sex, not everything else. I don't tell him how to do his job, for example. I don't control his relationships with his family. I wouldn't want to do that. Let's say he wants to go out and have a drink or two with the guys after work. He'd need to get my permission to do that, but I wouldn't dictate what he could drink, or what he would wear. That just seems ridiculous to me. But if he wants to fuck someone, he needs to come to me."

I wasn't sure I heard her right. "You mean if he wants to fuck someone else? Besides you? Why would he..? And why would you...?

She smirked at me, lifting her eyebrow the way she does. "Why would he want to fuck someone else, and why would I let him?" Kate asked. "Because it's fun, Ana. Playing is fun. I watched Elliot fuck Leona, and it didn't bother me. In fact, it turned me on. Big time."

I think my eyes bugged out of my head. "I'd kill Christian if he fucked anyone else," I told her. "Or at least, that would be the end of us."

"Yeah, well, Christian is not Elliot. Christian would never fuck anyone else, not when he has you. And he certainly wouldn't do it the way you were commanding him to do it."

"What?" I asked. "Are you saying...?"

"I'm saying that Elliot fucked Leona the way I commanded him to. They were two subs fucking under their masters' command. He didn't put his dick in her mouth or pussy until I told him to. She didn't suck him until Chad told her to. That's how it worked."

"Holy shit," I muttered.

"Yeah, and Chad was so cool too. He showed me respect as a Domme, and I showed it right back. The way he asked my permission before he played with my tits showed he respected my status. It just felt right while we were watching Elliot lick Leona's tits and were both getting turned on. And I asked Chad's permission before I ate out his sub, and again later before I sucked him off. Likewise, he asked my permission before he told Leona to go down on me. Actually, he made her beg me. It was hot. I'd never had an exchange like that with another Dom. It was great. I really like Chad. I like the relationship he has with Leona, and that's what I want to have with Elliot. Leona has a life... she's a doctor. A successful one. Chad doesn't control anything about her career. But he controls her in their personal lives, and she loves it. Elliot loves what they have too. We both want the same thing. Not that we don't respect Ken and Raina. They're cool. They both want the relationship that they have, that's clear. Raina gets off on the full-time control Ken has over her. It's just not for me.

"So he controls everything, including her career?" I asked curiously.

"Yes," Kate answered. "She obeys him in everything. Every little thing. He feeds her. She doesn't take a bite or a drink without his permission. He tells her what to wear, or what not to wear, and I'm not talking just about the dungeon, but all the freaking time. She doesn't even take a piss without his permission. And as for her career... she works for him. She's his PA. He's an investment banker. A very successful one, who at this point only works when he wants to. So they spend most of their time doing whatever he wants them to do. And she seems to love it. The whole arrangement seems to work for them. But to me, it would be exhausting."

"I would hate to be that controlled," I said. "I mean, it was hot when Christian made me wear that God-awful dress to the play party, and I didn't mind when he asked me to stop wearing my glasses... but that's just it, he asked nicely."

Kate smirked at me. "I'm glad he got you to stop wearing those hideous things."

"I have to admit, I don't miss them," I admitted. "Anyway, back to you. So, was Leona your first...? I mean, haven't you done group play before?"

Kate answered, "I've done group play with guys. Submissive guys. I like playing with two guys at once. I've done that a lot in the past. A few times, I've even had three guys at once, and that was a lot of fun too. Sometimes the guys are bi, but not always. Elliot and Chad are not bi. They didn't do each other, but they both really enjoyed playing together. We're going to keep it up. But to answer your other question, no, Leona wasn't my first pussy. But she was without a question the best. I've been with a few girls in the past, but I didn't really like it. I did it more out of curiosity. I've never really been attracted to women. But I'm attracted to Leona. So is Elliot. Neither of us is attracted that way to Chad, but it works for him to be part of the play. And I think Chad is grateful to me because I can fulfill a need in his sub, because she's bi, and he didn't want to have another sub besides her, at least not long-term. Up to now, they've just played on occasion with unattached subs, but this feels more permanent. I think Elliot and I are entering into a new level of friendship with Chad and Leona. One where we all play together regularly."

I had to think about that for a minute, just to process what she was saying. "Christian said Chad was one of Elliot's best friends," I remembered. "Have they played together before?"

"No, surprisingly enough," Kate answered. "They've watched each other play a lot over the past couple of years, but never together. It was my idea, and Chad liked it, so we went with it. At first, Elliot wanted to play with you and Christian. I think you already knew that, right?"

"God, yes. He's over that, right?" I asked.

"Completely, Ana. Stop worrying. Neither Elliot nor I want to have sex with you or Christian."

"Damn it, Kate, will you lower your voice?" I shushed her again.

"Relax, Ana. Nobody can hear me. I'm more aware of these things than you realize." Kate looked around and seemed satisfied. She was right, of course. Nobody was sitting near enough to hear any of our conversation. Whenever the server came near, we stopped talking until he'd gotten out of earshot.

"Anyway," Kate said, "Enough about me. I want to hear about you and Christian. And all these other people, including his kid. Damn, Ana, are you really going to adopt her?"

"I am," I answered without any hesitation. "And Kate, this may come as a surprise, but Christian is a fantastic father. He has been feeding her and putting her to bed every night. He reads to her. It's the sweetest thing you've ever heard. I think I fall deeper in love with him everyday. And I've fallen for Christina too. She is the sweetest little thing. She's already calling Christian Da-Da. And everyday when I get home from work, she wants me to play blocks with her. She likes me to brush her hair too."

"Damn, Ana," Kate smirked. "You're both sounding downright domestic."

I laughed. "Yeah, I guess we are. But I'm happy, Kate. So incredibly happy. I love him. And he loves me."

"You said earlier that you weren't sure if you'd get married. Why not?" Kate asked.

"We haven't talked about it. There's no doubt in my mind that we're going to be together for the long haul. I see my future with him. With both of them. I see more kids in the future too. I just don't know if we have to be married to have all that."

Kate nodded in understanding. "You want to hold on to part of your independence. I get it. Does Christian get it, though?"

"Like I said, we haven't talked about it. He wasn't happy when I told him I wanted to hyphenate Christina's name, so that makes me think he doesn't get it, or that he won't get it. But I'm Anastasia Steele, and I'm going to be her mother. Why shouldn't she have my name too, not just his?"

Kate smirked knowingly. "Would you take his name, if you married him?" she asked.

"I haven't really thought about it... but," I thought about it for a second and then answered, "No. Why should I change my name? Are you going to change yours when you marry Elliot?"

"Not sure yet," Kate answered. "I'm seriously considering it."

"Well, that surprises me. I'd expect it to be more likely that Elliot would change his name to yours."

Kate sniggered. "No, that would never work. He's a Grey. His business is in his name, and I don't want that to change. Honestly, I like the idea of being a Grey. Look at Christian's reputation, and Elliot's too, for that matter. I want to be associated with them. I love that Elliot is who he is. I'd love him even if he weren't a Grey, but I love that he is one."

"So why not hyphenate your name?" I suggested. "After all, your own name is pretty damn impressive. Your dad has made Kavanagh a household name. If I were a journalist like you, I'd want my name to be Kavanagh."

"That's exactly what I'm leaning towards," she answered. "Actually, I like the idea of both Elliot and me hyphenating our names. Our kids too. We can all be the Kavanagh-Greys. I like it. I'm still considering all my options, but I like that option the best, and I think Elliot will too. We have a couple of months to make decisions like that."

"A couple of months?" I asked. "When are you getting married, Kate?" I asked.

"Soon, Ana," she smirked. "I'll tell you when we set the date. But we don't want a long engagement."

"Wow! Really?" I responded. "What's the rush, Kate? I know you're not pregnant. Well, you haven't had time to find out yet, even if you are. So I know it's not that."

Kate smiled and answered, "Why wait? I know I want to marry him. He knows he wants to marry me. I know there is no other man in this world who is as perfect for me as Elliot. He's the one I want to be with. And I don't want to waste any time making him mine."

"Damn it, girl, who are you? Well, I'm happy for you. And if things work out the way I expect them to with Christian, we'll be sisters-in-law."

"You should marry him, Ana. Seriously," Kate said.

"Let's talk about something else," I suggested. "I still have a lot to tell you, and I need your advice."

"My advice," she asked, perking up a little.

"Yes, Madame Katherine. Your advice as a Domme. Christian wants me to top him, and I've agreed to do it. But I don't know what the hell I'm doing. So what do I need to know?"

Kate looked stunned for a second. "You're going to top Christian? Seriously? He's going to sub for you?"

"Yes," I smirked. "That's what I said. But I don't even know where to start."

"OK, first... I just want to know... why did you decide to do this?"

I sighed and explained, "Remember when it all came out that day at Christian's parents, when the bitch troll showed up? Remember how I made her think I was Christian's Domme?"

"Yeah, I remember," Kate said.

"I think it turned Christian on a little. He suggested that I might be a switch. I refused to entertain the idea at the time, but then he kept bringing it up, so I know it's something he wants us to explore. I don't think I'm a switch, but I think it will be fun to try it, just once. Maybe it will make me a better sub to understand it from the other person's point of view."

"Well, that's true. I subbed in the past just for that reason." Kate was pensive for a moment, and then she advised me, "Before anything, make sure you know what his limits are. Even if you think you know, talk about it anyway before you get into a scene. After that, just have fun with it. Do what you think will bring him the most pleasure. Remember that it's about his pleasure, not yours. You'll experience plenty of pleasure too, but only because of what you're doing for him. It's only about your pleasure if you're punishing him. Otherwise, it's all about him. But don't let him come, at least not right away. The longer you make him wait, the better it will be."

"What about punishments?" I asked. "Or even if it's not a punishment, how do I use his toys, like the flogger, or riding crop? Should I even try, if I've never done anything like that?"

"I'd avoid using any implements of torture the first time," Kate said sarcastically. "But seriously, you won't need them. Maybe a paddle to spank his ass. Your hands are so small, and his ass looks so firm, so if you want to spank him, it will probably hurt you more than it will him. I'm sure he has a paddle that will work well for you, but we can go shopping before you do it if you want. You should invest in a cock ring. It will totally be worth it. Other than that, use vibrators and dildos that I'm sure he already has."

"A cock ring, huh?" I asked.

"Mmm hmm. He'll last a lot longer with it, and when you finally let him come, it will blow his mind."

"OK, I'll keep that in mind," I told her.

"Ana, there's something else I have been wanting to ask you about," Kate said.

"What's that?" I asked.

"Those videos... I know about them. Elliot told me after that day at his parents' house when Christian told them all. But now that the Bitch Troll is dead, was Christian able to get them? Is he still at risk of them getting leaked to the public?"

"Why are you asking, Kate?" I asked, mainly out of curiosity, not because I didn't trust Kate's intentions.

"Because I know how damaging it could be. It's every Dom's worst nightmare, especially someone as well known to the general public as Christian. I'm worried for him, and if he's damaged, you and Elliot both will be as well. And I love the two of you more than anyone else in the world. I'm concerned, Ana."

I considered it for a moment and decided to tell Kate. "It's even worse than you think," I admitted to her. "Remember Jack Hyde, my former COO?"

Kate nodded, her eyes wide because she knew where I was going.

"He bought some of the videos from Elena. He has them and is planning to release them. Seems that he has some kind of personal vendetta against Christian, and he will use the videos in the most damaging way that he can imagine. The only reason he took the job with me was to get to Christian. Anyway, I've been trying to convince Christian to go public with BDSM to get ahead of the storm, but so far he's refused."

"Holy shit," Kate said. "Now all that shit from last week makes a bit more sense. Your texts were pretty cryptic. But Ana... you've got to know what a risk Christian would be taking to go public. I agree that it might help him in the long run, but I understand his hesitation."

"You know how it's going to look to the public when those videos come out," I told Kate. "You know everyone is going to think he's a monster, abusing those women. If it's already public knowledge that he used to practice BDSM and that they were willing, that it was all consensual, then the videos won't be as damaging when they come out."

Kate raised her eyebrow again. "Used to?" she asked.

"I want to paint a picture of my long-term dating relationship with him, not my submission to him," I explained. "He's a doting father now. Really, that's the truth, not just a story for the public. And I'm adopting his child. Again, truth. The public doesn't need to know that I sub for him sometimes. It's irrelevant."

"Don't you think you're being a wee bit naive?" Kate asked. "Surely you must know how the media is going to react when this story comes out, whether Christian tells it first or not. They're going to attack you, Ana. I know, because I'm the media. I know how we journalists think. Guilty by association. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE, is going to want to know about your sex life."

I sighed. "So what do I do, Kate?"

"Honestly, are you really committed to him for the long haul?" she asked.

"Absolutely," I answered.

"Marry that man," she said. "The sooner the better. Get a ring on that finger. Show the public how committed you are by making the most permanent long-term commitment a person can make."

I smirked at her, "What are you suggesting, Kate, that I go home and propose to Christian tonight?"

"Why not, Ana? I would," she answered.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, you would. Anyway, whether I'm his wife or not, I'm with him through this, come what may. But I'm worried, Kate. Very fucking worried."

Kate looked thoughtful for a moment. "What if I did an exclusive interview with both of you?" she asked. "We could air it on our network. It wouldn't have to be live, so we'd have a chance to edit anything you didn't want to air. Christian could hint at his past but wouldn't have to say more than he was comfortable saying. It would be safer than a press conference. You could control it more. Then, you could avoid the media until things calm down. It's worth a shot."

I nodded at her. "I like the idea, but I know Christian won't. I'll try to convince him though. I really believe we need to get ahead of this before Hyde does whatever he's planning to do."

"I'm with you, Ana," Kate assured me. "Just name the time and place. It will be big for me, so I'll happily cancel anything to accommodate your schedules. And I'm sure Dad will be all for it, so putting together a camera crew at the last minute won't be a problem."

"Thanks, Kate. I'll let you know what Christian says," I told her.

Just then, Sawyer walked towards our table, looking very disturbed. But instead of asking me to leave for some security problem as I expected, he pulled up a chair, sat down, and held his phone out in front of me. "I'm sorry for interrupting your conversation, but you need to see this, and I am taking a risk that you don't mind Ms. Kavanagh knowing about it, since unfortunately it is now public knowledge."

"Shit, what is it, Sawyer?" I asked, my heart filled with dread.

"See for yourself," he answered. He pushed play on the video that he had open on his iPhone. What I saw next made my heart stop. So much for getting ahead of Hyde. While we'd been sitting here discussing the idea, Christian's video... at least one of them... had already gone live. Damn, it was already going viral. Shit! Shit! Shit!

"Kate, set it up, the sooner the better," I told her. "It's all about damage control now. I need to get to GEH. I'm sure Christian already knows, but I need to get to him as soon as possible. I'll let you know when and where. Let's go, Sawyer."

Sawyer walked me to my car, which Prescott had waiting for us at the front door. They had been anticipating paparazzi, but thankfully, there were only a few outside snapping pictures and yelling out rude questions they thought I'd be stupid enough to answer. Easy to ignore them.

Ten minutes later, I walked into Christian's office at GEH and found him sitting at his desk, staring at his computer monitor, where a picture of me holding Christina that he'd taken the previous evening filled the screen.

"It's over, isn't it?" he said sadly, not even looking at me. "I don't blame you, Ana. I'm a fucking monster. How could you possibly want to be with me. You should take Christina. I'm not fit to be her father."

"Bullshit!" I snapped. "There is no person in this world better suited to be her parent than you." I walked over to him and sat down in his lap. "What's it going to take for you to realize... for you to believe... I'm not going anywhere."

He looked at me in despair. "Why are you here, Ana?" he asked.

"Because I love you, Christian," I answered.

"How?" he asked. "Did you see it? Did you notice that it was Leila?"

"Yes, Christian. Yes, to both questions," I answered.

"Ana... do you realize... I'm the worst kind of human being that there is. I am worse than the son of a bitch who knocked up my birth mother. He left us to starve, which is exactly what I did to Leila and my daughter. If she hadn't gotten to you, they might both be dead right now. I left my child to go through the exact same shit I went through, helpless. All these years, I was angry at the wrong person. My birth mother most likely was just like Leila... just a different sickness than cancer. Why didn't anyone help her?"

I wasn't sure what to say, so I just held him, just loved him. Finally I found words. "Christian, you are an amazing man. You've overcome so much and become one of the smartest business leaders in America. Your mother would be proud of you. I am proud of you. I am so happy that the world knows you're mine. And you're doing something now to help Leila. We both are. And you've stepped up and taken on the responsibility you should have from the start. It's not too late to be the father to Christina that you're supposed to be. You're already doing that."

"I don't deserve to be her father," he insisted. He was unable to hold back his tears, and so was I.

"Bullshit," I said again, ignoring my tears, but wiping his away with my fingers. "I don't deserve to be her mother either. Leila doesn't deserve to die. None of this is because anyone deserves anything, but because it is what it is. That little girl needs you, Christian. She needs both of us. I can only be her mother. You have to be her father. I can't do it without you. You need to get over yourself, snap out of it, and man up. I know you've been through hell, and now you think those videos have destroyed you, but we will get through it. I will go through it with you, because I love you, and there's nowhere else I'd rather be."

"Ana, surely you realize that I'm going to bring you down with me if you stay. You can't, Ana. It will destroy you too, and you've worked so hard to get to where you are."

I rolled my eyes, feeling exasperated. "Christian, should I record myself and just keep pushing play? Bullshit! Bullshit! BULLSHIT! Yes, I do realize that the media is going to attack me too. Yes, I do realize that my sex life is going to be the talk of every household in the country, along with yours. But do I think it's going to destroy Ismintis or GEH? No, absolutely not. We will probably both take a hit, but it won't come close to destroying either of us, and it won't last long. We are going to come out, Christian. We are going to tell the world that we are into BDSM. We're going to explain what BDSM is, so they will all know that you are not a monster who was attacking Leila in that video."

"Have you lost your mind?" Christian asked incredulously.

"Have you lost yours?" I snapped right back. "What, do you want to keep quiet? Now of all times, when your credibility is on the line. No way in hell! It's time to speak, to tell the world the truth. The truth will set you free, Christian."

Christian still looked just as skeptical. "You want to have a press conference and tell all? Ana, they will eat us both for lunch. There's no way in hell I'm going to let you put yourself through that."

"I'm not suggesting a press conference," I said. "The funny thing is... not funny, ha ha, but funny ironic... Just before Sawyer told me about the video, I was talking with Kate about this very problem. How I've been trying to get you to go public, to get ahead of the problem. She suggested an exclusive interview. Christian, you know there's no better person in the world to interview us than Kate. She's a very well-known journalist, very well-respected, and she gets it better than anyone. She's a Domme, for fuck's sake."

Christian sighed. "OK," he said finally.

"OK?" I asked, not sure what he was agreeing to.

"OK, let's do it. I agree. It can't hurt."

I blew out a sigh of relief. "It's already in the works. I just need to call Kate and tell her the time and place. We should get our PR teams to coordinate with her."

"OK," Christian agreed, "but only to discuss preliminaries. We need to tell them what we're planning and have them contact Kate with questions. They'll probably want to screen and approve her questions beforehand. She can play along with them, but when the time comes, I trust her to ask the right questions. When the time comes, I don't want there to be a room full of people."

"Christian, you know there's going to be a camera crew," I reminded him.

"Ask Kate for just the bare bones. Only as many as it takes. Honestly, I don't know if I can do this Ana, and it will be even harder if my employees are sitting there judging me. And yours... that will be even worse."

"It's going to be OK, Christian. You'll see," I assured him.

He looked at me, just staring for the longest time, as if he couldn't believe I was really there. I stared right back, trying to assure him telepathically that I wasn't going anywhere. Finally, I couldn't take the silence or the intensity of his gaze any longer, so I asked him the same question I'd asked before. "What's it going to take for you to realize that I'm not going anywhere?"

He continued to gaze at me, and I was unsure he'd even heard my question. Finally though, he answered. "There is one thing you could do that would assure me that you aren't leaving."

"What?" I asked.

"Marry me," he answered.

I smiled widely, so happy to hear these words coming from his mouth. "Really?" I asked. I could feel the tears stinging my eyes again. I'd told Kate I wasn't sure I wanted to marry him, but that was a lie. I wanted nothing more than to marry Christian.

"Really. Marry me, Ana. I want you in my life, for better or for worse. I sure as hell don't deserve you, but you'd make me the happiest man on earth if you'd agree to become my wife."

"Yes!" I answered. "Nothing would make me happier, Christian. I love you so much!"

He buried his head in my hair and breathed deeply. "I love you so fucking much it hurts. Thank you, Ana. Thank you, princess."

I shifted in his lap so that I was straddling him, and I kissed him deeply. He kissed me more passionately than any of the kisses we'd shared up to that point, as if I were water to his bleeding soul. Before I even realized what was happening, I was naked and spread across his desk, and he was inside me. With every pump, he cried out, "I love you! I love you! I love you!" We both came in no time at all.

Later, when we were cleaning up in his ensuite bathroom, I laughed, remembering my conversation with Kate.

"What's so funny?" Christian asked. "Not that I want you to stop. I love the sound of your giggle more than anything in the world."

"I was just thinking about my conversation with Kate. She knew about the videos because of that day at your parents' house, and she was worried. Oh, and I also asked for her advice as a Domme. Anyway, she gave me two pieces of advice."

Christian smirked. "And how did Madame Katherine advise you?" he asked.

"She said we should get married as soon as possible," I answered.

Christian's eyebrows shot up. "Really?"

"Really. Apparently she and Elliot are planning to tie the knot really soon. Oh, and that reminds me, she said if we're interested in learning about Japanese bondage... I forget what it's called, they have a friend who is an expert."

"Shibari?" Christian asked.

"Yes, that's it," I answered.

"Yes, I'm interested. I've been interested in it for a long time, but never had the time to learn," he said.

"OK, then. The guy's name is Ken, and he's staying with Elliot's friend Chad. Has Elliot told you that he and Kate are going to have a collaring ceremony?" I asked.

"Yes," Christian smiled. "And that he's going to propose to her. We have to go. Are you OK with that? With going to another play party?"

"Yes, I'm actually looking forward to it," I answered.

"Me too, for more reasons than one. Elliot showed me Kate's ring. He's so fucking excited about it."

"Is it nice?" I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

"I think so," he said. "Yours will be better though," he added.

I rolled my eyes. "I don't need to compete with Kate for who has the flashiest engagement ring."

"Did you just roll your eyes?" he asked.

I rolled them again, dramatically. "I did. And you're going to have to just deal with it, because it's my turn right now."

He smirked, and I could see that he was getting turned on again. "Your turn? Whatever do you mean, Princess?"

"That reminds me," I said. "Kate recommended another kind of ring too, not just a wedding ring."

I could see he was catching on quickly. "Oh, really? And what kind of ring is that?"

"Do you have a cock ring?" I asked him.

"As a matter of fact, I do," he answered.

"Good, because I think today of all days, a sex shop is the last place we want to be seen by paparazzi. And today of all days, it's time for you to get your wish, tiger. So here's what you're going to do. From now until the end of the day, you are going to call me Goddess. After you talk with your PR team and handle any other urgent business you may have, you are to take the rest of the afternoon off. Tell Andrea to cancel all your appointments that can wait. I'm sure you wouldn't be able to focus anyway, even if you tried to work, so just don't, not anymore than you have to. Go home, and prepare yourself. I want you to be in the playroom, in position, at exactly 5:00 p.m. Don't forget your cock ring. Oh, and wear a blindfold. That's all. I will also take off early this afternoon. And I look forward to ravishing you. But first, be ready to discuss your limits."

Christian stared at me, wide-eyed. I think he was drooling a little. Finally, he swallowed and answered, "Yes, Goddess."

I smiled widely at him. "Get ready for me to rock your world," I promised him before I kissed him chastely on his lips and walked out the door.

As soon as I got in the elevator, I texted Andrea and asked her to get my PR team together in the executive conference room. Then, I texted Kate and told her to set things up for tomorrow at 9 a.m. at GEH. She responded back immediately, suggesting that it would be better to have the interview at one of our homes to make it feel more personal. I agreed, but I knew my home was out of the question because Leila and Christina were there, so I told her to go with Christian's penthouse.

As Prescott drove us to Ismintis, I remembered to text Carolyn Acton, my person shopper, and had her pick out something appropriate for this afternoon and send it to Escala. Of course I didn't need to tell her what it was for, just sexy red negligee.

This afternoon at 5 p.m., I was going to rock Christian's world. After the state I found him in when I arrived at his office, I knew how helpless he was feeling. I knew that he needed to experience the release of control for a while, and that ultimately, it would do him good. I was going to give it my all, to dominate him the way he wanted me to, even if I felt awkward doing it.

But I also knew that Christian needed to feel in control more than anything. By the end of the evening, that is exactly what I intended to happen. Before the evening was over, my master would be back on top, right where he belonged. And then, little by little, everything in our world would become right again.


	31. Chapter 31: Leila's Dying Wish (CPOV)

**Chapter 31: Leila's Dying Wish (Christian's POV)**

With a relieved sigh, I went back to my desk, where I immediately saw the photo of Ana and Christina that I'd been looking at earlier, when Ana had arrived in my office. Had that really only been an hour ago? Everything had changed in that short amount of time. I had been at rock bottom, ready to completely check out. When I'd watched that fucking video, I had never hated myself so much. I felt sick to my stomach, remembering how "perfect" I had considered Leila at the time for taking that kind of beating. What the hell had been wrong with me, to get off on hurting her like that? Most likely, she'd already been sick with cancer, even then. She had first been diagnosed while she was pregnant, just a few months later.

Ana had been trying to get me to go public with my lifestyle before the video was released, because we both knew it was coming. She'd made a pretty convincing argument that I needed to get ahead of Hyde before he leaked my secrets to the press, but I'd refused, thinking that I'd be able to figure something out to stop Hyde before he did it. Barney and Samantha had been keeping close watch over his online activity, and I thought we'd be able to stop him in time. How wrong I'd been! Turns out, he didn't use the Internet to release the videos. He'd probably given a USB drive to someone, probably disguised as a pizza delivery guy. By the time Barney saw the video, it had already gone viral. There was no way to stop it at that point. At first, I was mad as hell at Barney and Samantha for their failure, but my anger quickly turned inward. There was really nobody to blame for this fucking mess except myself, for being such a fucking animal who got off on beating the hell out of a sick woman.

I didn't think Ana would want to put up with me after it came out. My own reputation was destroyed, not just by the video but by all of the speculation that came with its release. It had all been expected, but still very, very damaging. And with the destruction of my reputation, Ana's would be right with it, since we'd announced our relationship only a few days ago. I knew she would end things with me as soon as possible, just to save her own reputation. And what kind of father could I be to Christina when the entire world now knew what I'd done to her mother? I felt so ashamed. I'd hated myself so much that I'd wanted to die. Literally. Just crawl in a hole somewhere and never come out. Take _the Grace_ out into the bay alone and jump overboard, leaving the world behind me. Everyone I cared about would be better off without me.

But then, Ana had waltzed into my office, and in true Ana style, she had flipped my world upside down, so I could see the sunshine again. Sunshine. How about that? She'd called me tiger today, but I wondered if sunshine would make an appearance when we played together this afternoon. Holy shit, I could hardly wait. I was already hard as a rock.

I hadn't intended to ask Ana to marry me yet, but I just couldn't wait, after she'd promised me repeatedly that she wasn't going anywhere, no matter what. What she didn't realize is that I already had her ring picked out, custom-made, special-ordered, and I was going to pick it up today. When I'd gone with Elliot earlier in the week to pick up Kate's ring, I'd ordered Ana's, and I'd rushed the order because I'd planned to propose to her this coming weekend. I could hardly wait to make her my wife. So I'd jumped the gun today, caught up in the moment, overcome by my fear of losing her. She'd made everything right again when she'd agreed to marry me, with no hesitation, regardless of the shit storm over the damn video. My god, I loved her. So fucking much.

I took Ana's advice... or obeyed my Goddess's command... same difference, and I finished a few urgent matters as quickly as I could so I could go get her ring and get home in time to take a shower and be waiting for her in the playroom at 5 p.m.

First, I needed to touch base with Leo to see if the property he had gone to look at this morning was suitable for their cafe. I smiled thinking about his reunion with Mia, which she had told me all about the following day. To say she had been ecstatic to see him would be the understatement of the year. I was her favorite brother again because I had brought Leo home with me. Elliot had knocked me out of that place when he redesigned her Paris apartment, even though I had paid for it, but I was back on top again, right where I belonged. And Mia's dream was going to come true. She and the man she loved were going to run a cafe together, and we were already in the process of getting it started. Unfortunately, Leo reported that the place they'd looked at that morning needed too much work and was in a part of town that they really didn't like, so it was a no go.

Next, I talked with Isaac, who was going home from the hospital today. I made sure that he was getting the therapy, both physical and psychological, that he needed. He told me about conversations he'd had with his mom, how she'd opened up to him about her past. He'd been shocked she even knew what BDSM was, much less that she'd been involved in it. He told me how guilty she felt for allowing him to work for Elena. I knew my parents felt that same guilt, and I told him so.

The conversation with Isaac made me realize that I actually had something to give young men like him who had gone through the same thing I had. I called Flynn and floated the idea past him. He sounded happily surprised that I was thinking about helping boys instead of freaking the fuck out over the media shit storm from the leaked video. I realized that my whole outlook on life had changed since the refreshing wind called Anastasia Steele had blown through my office. When I'd told Flynn about my conversation with Isaac and suggested that I could start something to help boys like him, Flynn had been encouraging, but he told me I needed to think it through and plan it out before making any quick decisions. I made an appointment to talk with him about it the following week.

After that, I checked in with Aiden Westlake, my FBI contact who had been investigating Elena's connections with human trafficking rings, and particularly Joseph Horowitz. I was worried that the Feds would think I was involved in that shit, since the video and media aftermath were making me look like a fucking barbarian. But I had been open enough with them about my past when I'd contacted them. Westlake, with whom I'd been working since I'd first contacted the FBI, was pissed off as hell at me for all the publicity because he was afraid it would affect his investigation. If my connections with Elena were made public, which was probably going to happen in the next few hours, then it could make some of the people she'd been working with jump ship before they could be found out. I'd learned all kinds of shit from Westlake regarding child prostitution and human trafficking of children. Thankfully, the FBI didn't suspect that I'd ever been involved in any of that, or in anything else illegal. Thank fuck. He instructed me to leave the FBI investigation out of any public statements that I made about the fucking video.

I'd already checked in with my Paris office that morning, as well as my New York office. No fires to put out anywhere. Maybe the news about that video hadn't made it across the country or ocean yet. One could only hope. Ros was taking care of two other accounts... companies that we were in the process of taking over. I was supposed to spend the afternoon interviewing potential directors for my new non-profit, but that would have to wait. After seeing the news, I doubted either of them would want to run a non-profit in my name. I needed to do some damage control before hiring a director and getting the non-profit off the ground.

I instructed Andrea to cancel everything else, and then I went to see a man about a ring. Taylor didn't say more than five words to me as we left my office and drove to the jeweler. He was pissed off at me too, so I didn't say more to him than I had to. He had been on Ana's team about getting ahead of Hyde, and I'd ignored his advice too. Oh well, it was too late to cry over it now. And I was more optimistic since Ana's visit that it would all be sorted out, and I would be able to recover from it.

When I arrived home, Gail greeted me from the kitchen, where she was cooking dinner. "Ms. Williams asked me to tell you when you came home that she'd like to have a word with you. She was awake and sitting in Ana's media room about ten minutes ago."

"OK, thanks, Gail," I told her. I didn't have to guess what Leila wanted to talk with me about, now that the video had gone viral and was being discussed on every news network. Her name hadn't been mentioned yet, but it was only a matter of time before someone leaked her identity to the press. I was sure that she was upset about it, even though she'd been the one to record the damn thing without my knowledge and then sell it to Elena. But I was over that, and I felt terrible that she was caught up in this, in her condition. I wouldn't make her wait. At this point, I felt that I owed her anything she asked for. The guilt over what I'd done to her still all but consumed me.

I made my way through the new door into Ana's penthouse, and to her media room, where Leila was watching TV with her nurse. Of course, they had to be watching a news story from a major network... about me, and what a monster I was. Just as I walked in, the news anchors were speculating about who the woman in the video was. Shit! I had hoped the damned nurses would have prevented her from seeing the media coverage of the fucking video. Didn't they know that she didn't need to watch things that would upset her like that? I wanted to fire the nurse who was sitting there watching it with her, but I couldn't because Ana had hired her. There was nothing I could do.

I entered the room and cleared my throat to get their attention before I asked the fucking nurse as politely as I could, "Would you mind giving us a few minutes?" I thought I saw a look of disgust on her face, but it was gone so quickly I could have imagined it. She politely excused herself, saying that she'd be in the library until she was needed.

I sat down across from Leila, looked her in the eye, and said, "I'm really sorry, Leila. I wish I could..."

"No!" she interrupted me. "Stop it! I'm the one who should be sorry, Christian, not you! I made that video. I did that! And then I sold the damn thing to that evil woman. It's all my fault. I am responsible for ruining your reputation, and I am so, so sorry."

I was glad to hear her referring to me as Christian, not Sir, but she didn't need to apologize or feel guilty about selling Elena the video. It was water under the bridge. "Leila, we've already had this conversation. I forgave you, remember?"

"That was before this happened," she said, pointing to the television, which she'd already turned off.

"There was always the risk that this would happen," I told her. "You should have realized that from the start. Anyway, it doesn't matter now. I'm not angry with you, not in the least. In fact, I feel terrible about it happening in the first place."

She moved to the edge of her seat and looked at me earnestly. "You have no reason to feel terrible, Christian," she said. "I wanted that. I enjoyed it. Surely, you haven't forgotten that. I begged you for it. You were the best Dom I've ever had, hands down. Hell, Christian, those beatings were what made me fall for you, because you gave it to me so good. I'm sorry if it's inappropriate for me to tell you that now, but it's the truth. I just regret that I deceived you and betrayed you. I wasn't the sub you thought I was, but you were always the Dom I thought you were."

"You have no idea what kind of Dom I was, Leila," I responded. "I got off on hurting you."

Leila rolled her eyes, then caught herself and blushed. "I remember you hated eye rolling. Sorry." She laughed humorlessly before she continued, "I remember a lot of things. I got off on being hurt by you. Face it, Christian, we were both in the lifestyle because of what we got out of it. Both of us. I may not have had a sex drive in over a year... the cancer killed it long ago... but I remember what it was like to have one. I remember... what it was like to be with you. You need to believe me when I tell you that you have nothing to regret. Absolutely nothing. I saw the guilt in your eyes when you sat down, but I'm the only one of us who should feel guilty."

"You shouldn't feel guilty," I told her. "Did you know that there are a dozen other videos out there? Yours wasn't the only one. If it hadn't been yours, it would have been one of the others. And if it weren't for you, I wouldn't have known about the others. You're the one who opened my eyes to what kind of person Elena Lincoln actually was. I thought she was my friend."

Leila barely heard me. I could see that my words weren't really registering with her. She looked me in the eyes, and bluntly said, "I want to do something for you, Christian. And I need you to let me do it. Call it a dying wish. I need to be able to do it, to ease my conscience. Just telling me not to feel guilty is not going to make it stop, because I know damn well what I did to you. So please, let me do this?"

"Let you do what, Leila?" For a moment, I was afraid that she was trying to offer me something sexual. I didn't think of her that way at all any longer, and she'd already admitted that she no longer had a sex drive. No, I knew that wasn't what this was. She was trying to fix her wrong, and I could easily guess how she wanted to do it. But no fucking way was I going to allow it.

"I want to tell the truth," Leila said. "I want to clear your name. But I've never told anyone about my time with you except Ana. I've honored the NDA, and I won't break it without your permission."

Yep, that was what I expect to hear her say, but I was still surprised that this was what she was calling her dying wish. "Leila, I can't allow you to do that. I mean, it's not fair to you. You shouldn't be worrying yourself about me anyway. You need to spend the time you have left in comfort, with Christina. If you come out with your story, the media is going to attack you. I can't let that happen to you, not after everything you've been through. It isn't necessary. This will all blow over. I'll be fine."

"No, Christian. You have to allow me to do this," she insisted. "It's my dying wish. It's the only way I can clear my conscience before I die. Don't you get it? I have this one chance to make things right, after all I've done to you. And you need me right now, whether you want to admit it or not. I've been watching the news all day, Christian. I know what those assholes are saying about you. And they're saying it because they're watching you do something... to ME... that they don't have a clue about. Let me help you! Please!"

Well, damn. What was I supposed to say to that? "Leila, you shouldn't get so worked up over this. It's not good for you. You're going to wear yourself out."

"Don't tell me what I should or shouldn't do," she snapped. "You made it clear that I'm no longer your submissive when you insisted that I call you Christian, so you no longer have the right to decide what is good for me or what isn't." She stopped herself and took a deep, calming breath. "I need this, Christian. Please."

I followed her lead and took my own deep breath. Was I really going to agree to let her do it? But really, how could I refuse her? She was right, it would help clear my name, but that wasn't why I was considering it. I really didn't want her to go to her grave with a guilty conscience over something she'd done to me. I wanted her to be at peace. Finally, I responded to her, "OK, Leila. Here are the conditions. It so happens that there's going to be a TV news crew in my penthouse tomorrow morning. Ana and I are trying to do damage control. Our friend Kate Kavanagh is going to interview us and broadcast it through Kavanagh Media. If, and I emphasize, IF you are feeling up to it, then you can come and tell Kate your story."

Leila looked relieved. "Thank you, Christian." Then she added, "I will be there. Thank you for agreeing to it. I'd really like to hug you right now."

There was no fucking way that was going to happen. "I'm the one who should be thanking you, Leila," I said, ignoring her request for a hug. "And remember, you can still change your mind."

"I won't change my mind," she assured me.

"OK, then," I answered, "I'll tell Ana and Kate to expect you."

"Yes, do," she said eagerly.

"Thank you, Leila," I repeated. "Really."

"You can thank me after it's over, Christian," she replied. "I hate what they're saying about you. It's not true. I admit, I've had a pretty shitty opinion of you for the past year, but that was because I thought you didn't want your daughter and that you refused to take responsibility for her even though you are a billionaire. But now that I know the truth, that you truly didn't know about her, I can honestly say that you're one of the best men I know. I'm glad you're Christina's father."

Well, shit! What did I say to that? "I'm glad I'm her father, too, Leila." With that, I stood up and started to leave. But for some reason, I felt like I owed her an explanation. Why was that? I'd never felt the need to explain myself before. Before I could stop myself, I said, "I can't hug you, Leila. I have touch issues. I never explained that to my subs, but it was why you were never allowed to touch me. But Leila, I want you to know... I'm glad that we have become... friends."

She stared at me in shock. I could see that she was trying hard to hold back tears, and damn it all if I didn't feel my own eyes stinging a little. Shit! Finally, Leila was able to speak. "Umm... I'm glad we've become... friends... too, Christian."

As I made my way back to my penthouse to get ready for Ana, I started to berate myself for becoming such a soft pussy, but then I thought better of it. I knew in my gut that what I'd just told Leila was not only the truth, but it was also what she needed to hear from me right then. Friends. I'd just told Ana a couple of weeks ago that I didn't do friendship. I especially didn't do friendship with former subs. When I'd told Ana that, I never would have guessed in a million years that I would soon find out that Leila had given birth to my daughter, and then that I'd become friends with her in spite of that fact. And yet, here we were. Friends.

In my bedroom, I stripped out of my clothes and got in my shower. It was time to clear my mind from everything except my Ana. My Goddess, who was going to top me tonight. It would be my first time to sub since I was nineteen years old. Since Elena. In spite of that, I didn't feel nervous, not really, not with my Princess. I felt excited more than anything. Would Ana like it? Would she want to continue it? I wasn't sure how I felt about that. I wanted her to enjoy it, but I also didn't want to give up my dominance, at least not for long.

I imagined what she would do once we were in the playroom. The way she'd commanded me to wear a penis ring and a blindfold had been so fucking hot. I was already hard, just thinking about it. I was tempted to jerk off in the shower, but I knew she wouldn't want that. It would be grounds for punishment. Then again... what would it be like for Ana to punish me? That thought made me even harder. Should I do it? I sure as hell needed to, and then I could tell her what I'd done, and wait to see how she'd choose to punish me. Damn it, I was already topping from the bottom.

I got out of the shower, still hard as a rock, and threw on my bathrobe. I wouldn't need to get dressed until later, after we were done playing. I checked the time. 4:35. Good. I made my way to my playroom, where I needed to get things ready for Ana. She didn't know where I kept everything, and I wanted her to be able to find things easily.

I made sure the vibrators were all fully charged, and then I looked through the drawer where I kept my cock rings, deciding which one to wear. For a moment, I was thankful that I didn't have any cock and ball torture toys. All of my cock rings served the purpose of stimulating my subs. Especially the vibrating ones. Most of them had clit stimulators. Ana would love them, I was certain. But this wasn't the time.

I knew Kate had suggested a cock ring because she knew Ana would want me to last as long as possible, and Kate had no way of knowing how I'd trained myself to go for hours. I didn't intend to ever have that conversation with my brother's fiancee. Regardless of how open we all were with each other about our lifestyle, that would just be weird. Anyway, Ana wanted a cock ring, so she'd get a cock ring. For tonight, I chose a simple metal one that I knew from experience would keep me hard for hours. Hopefully, she wouldn't make me go that long. I was only semi-hard now, so I could fairly easily slip it on, with only a little lube. I left the lube out, easy for Ana to find it.

I looked over my stock of whips, canes, crops, floggers. Which of these would Ana choose to use? I knew she wouldn't know how to use most of them, and I wondered if she would want my help. I'd given pointers to other new Doms at play parties in the past, but never to a Domme who was attempting to top me. I wasn't sure how that would work.

4:55 p.m. I wanted to be in position, in case she was early. I removed my bathrobe and hung it on the back of the bathroom door. Then I walked back over to my toy chest and grabbed a black blindfold. No, red satin. She'd like that better. I found the spot near the door where I'd always preferred my subs to wait for me, and I knelt. Damn, it had been a long time. I moved my body into the exact position that I always wanted to find my subs, with my knees spread. I slipped the blindfold over my eyes before I rested my hands on my thighs. I took a deep breath, and then I waited.


	32. Chapter 32: Ana on Top (CPOV)

**Chapter 32: Ana on Top (Christian's POV)**

She had said 5:00 p.m., right? I was sure at least fifteen minutes had passed. Maybe more. What if I'd gotten the time wrong? What if she'd changed her mind? What if something had happened to her? What if all the news coverage, and the fucking paparazzi hounding her, and the assumptions the assholes in the media were making about her now that she was with me, and I was a monster who attacked helpless women... what if it all had gotten to her and she no longer wanted to be with me?

Before I could get too carried away in my fears, I heard the playroom door open and then click shut, and then I could smell her. My God, she smelt good. Apples and vanilla with a bit of something else. Honeysuckle. I wanted to suckle her. I could feel myself getting harder as she walked towards me, but I was careful to keep my head bowed submissively, just the way I would have expected any of my subs to do. I could feel her near me, could feel her eyes on me, even though she didn't speak. I knew I was expected to remain silent, so I did and just waited for her.

After what had to have been a couple of minutes of her just standing there, finally she spoke. "Stand up, sunshine."

I obeyed her at once, trying hard not to smile. Then, she removed the blindfold. "Hi," she said shyly. She didn't sound the least bit dominant.

I kept my eyes downcast even though I was dying to get a good look at her. Apparently, she wanted me to get a good look at her too. "Look at me," she ordered. "Look at all of me, tiger, and tell me what you see." She didn't sound so shy now.

Holy fuck! She was wearing a sheer red negligee, completely see-through. I could see her erect nipples clearly through the thin lacy fabric. I wanted to suck those nipples! And the thong... what little there was of it, was obviously split in the crotch, so her glistening pussy lips were already completely visible. She was stunning. And I was drooling. I could hardly wait to get a taste of her.

I swallowed my drool before I finally was able to respond to her. "I see... Holy fuck, Ana, you're hot as hell."

"What did you just call me, sunshine?" she asked, cocking one eyebrow in a sexy pose I had yet to see on her until now.

"Oh, shit. I called you Ana. I'm sorry, Goddess."

She smirked. "That's earned you a punishment, tiger. But first, before we talk about punishments, we need to talk. Go sit on the bed."

Remember what I said earlier about her not sounding the least bit dominant. I take it all back. My Goddess was in the room, and all I wanted to do was obey her every command. Immediately, I went and sat on the edge of the bed. She took her time, walking over to my toy chest and examining its contents first. She picked up a few things, obviously wondering what they were, but refusing to ask me. I would enjoy telling her all about them another time, when I was back on top.

She made her way over to the bed, and before she sat down next to me, she examined me. Really fucking examined me, making me even harder. "Does that hurt?" she asked, referring to my penis ring.

"No, Goddess, not at all," I answered. "It feels good."

"Well... good," she answered. "Now... limits. I already know some of your limits, but I'm not sure about others. You need to tell me. Be honest. Remember how important open communication is. I know it's been a while since you've done this, and I don't want to... I don't want you to... I don't want you to think of her. The nasty cunt. This is about your pleasure, sunshine. Remember that. Even when I punish you, I want you to enjoy it. Are you with me, tiger?"

"Yes, Goddess. I'm with you completely," I assured her. I was impressed with her, even if she did think I was supposed to enjoy punishments.

"Good," she responded. "Now look me in the eyes as we have this conversation, and answer my questions fully. First, how do you feel about me touching you?"

"Please touch me, Goddess," I answered without any hesitation.

"What are your limits with touching?" she asked. "Do you want me to honor your no-touch area? Your chest and back, where your scars are?"

"You can touch me anywhere, Goddess. It doesn't burn when you touch me," I told her. "In fact, I crave your touch."

"OK, good to know," she answered. "But just to make sure... are there any parts of your body that are off limits? What about your ass?"

Holy fuck! Did Ana want to ass fuck me? That came as a shock. And I wasn't sure how I felt about that, after my last experience with it. I'd sworn after I ended my last contract as a submissive that I would never do that again. I'd hated it more than anything when the evil bitch had done it to me, and she'd done it often. "Umm... you can touch my ass, Goddess. With your fingers, I mean. I'm OK with ass play, I think."

"So you'd be OK if I used a vibrating wand there?" she asked.

"Yes, I think so," I answered. I swallowed nervously.

"Yes, what?" she asked.

"Yes, Goddess," I remembered to say.

"Good. How about butt plugs or anal beads?" she asked.

"Holy shit, you know what anal beads are? And how to use them?" I asked her, completely forgetting my place again.

"You're racking up your punishments, tiger," she warned me. "I guess you'll just have to find out whether I know about anal beads, now won't you?"

"Yes, Goddess," I answered, trying my damnedest to sound more submissive.

"OK, you said you were OK with me using my fingers and a vibrating wand to touch your ass, but you sounded hesitant. So what are your limits there?"

"Well..." I swallowed before I admitted, "I'm not OK with dildos. Goddess. I'm not sure how I'll respond if you wear a strap-on. I think that would bring back memories of..."

"OK, stop," she commanded. "I don't want to know what that evil bitch did to you. I won't ass fuck you. I'm not into that. I don't think." She seemed flustered for a moment before she continued, "What other limits do you have? What about bondage?"

"I'd like to try it, Goddess. I think I'll like it when you do it," I answered.

She smiled. "Me too," she said. "What about toys? Is anything off limits?"

I considered the question for a moment. "If it's in my toy chest, other than dildos, it's fair game," I answered. "If you want to try other toys in the future, if we do this again... we need to discuss it first. There are some torture toys that Kate might tell you about that I don't think I can... I'd just rather not. But there's nothing like that in my toy chest, and if you can figure out what to do with it, then I'm OK with it. Goddess."

She smirked. "I can probably invent a few ways to use your toys. Just for you, sunshine." Holy crap, she was good at this.

"Can you think of any other limits?" she asked.

"No, Goddess," I answered.

"What is your safe word?" she asked.

"The same as we've used for you, Goddess. Red means stop, yellow means slow down. Green means go."

"Good," she responded. "Now, I think it's time for me to find out how your ass looks in pink. Get on the bed, on your hands and knees. We'll leave off the blindfold for now."

I obeyed her at once, and she got up and walked back over to my toy chest. Hanging next to it were a few paddles. She chose a brown leather one, tested it on her thigh, and walked back over to me.

"Two punishments. Ten strikes each. That makes twenty. Count for me, sunshine, and thank me after each one."

Hot damn! Where had she learned to dominate like this? "OK, Goddess. Thank you, Goddess," I responded submissively, just as I knew she wanted me to.

I hadn't expected the paddle to hurt at all. How hard could my little Ana possibly hit me? So I was surprised that by the fifth strike, my ass was beginning to really burn. She wasn't holding back, at all. By the tenth strike, it hurt like hell, and still my Ana didn't slow down. By eighteen, I wanted to cry like a baby, but of course I held back. On nineteen, my voice cracked, damn it all. When we got to twenty, Ana threw down the paddle, climbed under me, and began to suck my cock earnestly while she rubbed my sore ass. Holy shit! If she kept it up for a couple of minutes, I was going to blow, in spite of the cock ring.

I needn't have worried. Before I even got close, Ana was up again. "Lie down, face up, spread eagle," she commanded. I got into position, knowing that she wanted to cuff my wrists and ankles to the manacles attached to the four bedposts.

In no time at all, she had me spread out on the bed, bound to the bedposts, and at her mercy. She smiled at me evilly before she picked up the blindfold and slipped it back over my eyes. Then I felt her get up off the bed, and I heard her steps cross the room. I heard what sounded like a plastic bag rustling. She moved around some more. Was she at my toy chest, maybe? I wondered what toys she was choosing. Then she was back again, on the bed, and then straddling me.

"Are you hungry, tiger?" she asked.

"Yes, Goddess. I'm starving," I answered, and I didn't mean for food. I hoped that she was planning to sit on my face and feed me her pussy.

"I know you like vanilla. Open your mouth," she ordered.

Huh? Vanilla? What was she doing? I obeyed, and the next thing I knew, I had a mouth full of vanilla ice cream.

"It's Haagen Dazs," she said. "My favorite. You want some more?"

I nodded, and she responded by kissing me, with a mouth full of ice cream. Had I died and gone to paradise? Ana and Haagen Dazs. Delicious!

"Mmm... I have a new favorite," Ana said. "Christian and Haagen Dazs. Vanilla sunshine. More?" she asked.

I nodded again, but this time she said, "I can't hear you, tiger."

"Yes, please. Goddess."

And then her mouth was on mine again, sharing the cold goodness with me. If subbing for Ana was always going to be like this, I wanted to do it on a daily basis.

Ana shared a couple more ice cream kisses with me before she shifted back a little, and I felt cold liquid on my chest. The next thing I knew, she was licking me. But after just a few seconds, she sat up and asked, "Are you OK with this, tiger?"

I'd never been more OK in my life. "Green, Goddess," I answered. "Please, don't stop."

"I love how you beg, tiger." The next thing I knew, my chest was a lot wetter, and Ana was licking me like crazy. It was one of the most arousing things I'd ever experienced. And she was moving downward, drizzling the melted ice cream and then licking it from me. Of course I knew where she was headed, but she took her time getting there, teasing me. She drizzled ice cream over my stomach, and then licked it out of my belly button. Finally, I felt the first drops hitting my cock, and then she was licking me. She continued to tease me, doing nothing more than licking me for what felt like centuries. Drizzling more ice cream and then licking some more. Repeat. Oh, shit! I wasn't sure how much longer I could last.

I almost cried when I felt her move away from me. "Goddess! Please!" I called out.

"What do you want, tiger?" she asked. "Beg me for it."

"Please, Goddess. Will you... suck my cock?"

"Mmm..." she said as she drizzled more melted ice cream over my cock. "I'd love to. But remember, tiger... I'm not sure how that cock ring thingie works, but no coming until I say. I love swallowing your come, but not right now." With that, she swallowed me... almost literally. Holy shit! I was glad I was wearing the cock ring. Even with my stamina, I wouldn't have lasted without it. She sucked me, hard, and then she sucked even harder. And then she swallowed.

"Shit! Goddess! Please!" I begged.

She spit me out only long enough to respond, "Not yet, tiger," and then she was on me again, deep throating like her life depended on it. She swallowed a couple of times, and moaned like I was the best thing she'd ever tasted. And then she bared her teeth, and I was gone.

"Goddess! I'm coming!" I shouted. There was no fucking way I could stop it.

Ana didn't stop sucking. She swallowed every drop of my come and still kept sucking until I was limp, and then she slipped off the cock ring.

"I thought this thing was supposed to keep you from coming," she said.

"It did," I replied.

"You came," she argued. "Without permission," she added. "And you did it while you were blindfolded. I assume the same rules apply when we switch as when you're on top, and you'd never want me to come while blindfolded. But you just did."

"Yes, I did," I answered. "Please forgive me, Goddess. I couldn't stop myself."

"You've earned another punishment, sunshine," she answered. "And I know just want it's going to be. Remember how you punished me when I came without permission? Death by orgasm. How many orgasms have you ever had during one scene in the playroom?" she asked.

Oh, shit! She wasn't joking. "Umm... I'm not sure, Goddess. But you realize... men generally don't have multiple orgasms as easily as women do."

"I also realize, in spite of my limited experience, that you recover more quickly than most men, don't you, tiger." The next thing I knew, I heard a vibrating sound, and then I felt it on my cock. She was stimulating me with what felt like a vibrating wand.

"Well, look at that," she said. "You're getting hard again. So soon. See, I knew you had it in you. Now answer my question."

"I don't know, Goddess," I answered. I usually only came once, after holding back as long as I could, usually a couple of hours. Sometimes I came twice, if I came early on and then had time to recover.

"Then give me your best guess," she ordered.

"Umm... three?"

She responded by moving the vibrating wand over my cock and balls, up my ass, so I was lying with it shoved up my ass. "Want to try that again, tiger?" she asked. "You gave me twelve that night. Twelve powerful, life-affirming orgasms. And I was counting mine, not yours, but I'm pretty sure you had more than three that night. Let's go with six, shall we? It's only fair to at least go with half as many as you gave me."

Six orgasms in one scene? I didn't believe she could do it, but I sure as hell wanted to watch her try, and I sure as hell wanted to experience it. This was going to be fun. "Whatever pleases you, Goddess," I responded.

"It would please me for you to come in my mouth again, but this time, I want to come in yours at the same time." She got off me, and I felt her unbind my wrists and ankles from the bed. I didn't move until she told me to, even though the vibrator in my ass was driving me crazy.

She removed the vibrator at last and commanded. "Up on your knees, and hands behind your back." She got off the bed, and I heard her walk across the room as I obeyed her. By the time I was up on my knees, she was back, cuffing my hands behind my back. Then, she removed the blindfold. Holy fuck, she was naked now. When had she taken that negligee off? She picked up the pint of ice cream from the bedside table and said, "I'm not finished with this yet." She took a bite and then asked me if I wanted some more.

"I'd love some more, Goddess," I answered.

"I'm feeling generous," she said. Then, instead of giving me a bite of the ice cream, she lay down on the bed so that her head was between my knees. She held the ice cream over herself and drizzled it over her breasts. "Lick me," she ordered me.

She didn't need to ask me twice. I leaned over and licked the ice cream off her, giving extra attention to her nipples. When I lifted my head, she drizzled more ice cream over her breasts and down her stomach towards her cunt. I licked her clean again, making her moan a couple of times. The next time I lifted my head, she poured melted ice cream into her cunt, and I was on her before she even asked me. If my sub had done that without my permission, I would have punished her, but Ana didn't seem to mind. In fact, she wrapped her legs around my head, spreading herself more widely open for me. This right here... this was heaven. As I feasted on her, she put my cock in her mouth and sucked me until I was hard again.

I could feel her getting closer, so I sucked her clit harder, causing her to moan around my dick. Just a few seconds later, she cried out something I couldn't understand with my cock in her mouth, and she latched onto me as I came so hard I saw fireworks behind my eyes. Once again, she sucked me down, not spitting me out until I was soft again.

"Are you counting, sunshine?" she asked.

"Two, Goddess," I responded.

"Good. Now get up on your knees again." In just a second, she was in front of me, on her knees too. She looked behind her, at me, and said, "Now I want you to fuck me harder than you've ever fucked anyone in your life. Make me scream. And make me come. And then make yourself come."

"Ummm..." How did she expect me to do that? I'd just come in her mouth for the second time in probably not more than half an hour.

"What's wrong, sunshine?" she asked innocently, but I could hear the humor in her voice.

"I'm sorry, Goddess, but I need some recovery time before I can fuck you properly."

She smirked at me, and then her hand was around my cock. "I think I can help you with that," she said. She started jerking me off, and at the same time, she put her other hand between her legs and started rubbing herself. "Watch me, tiger. Don't you wish this was your dick? I sure do. Or your hand. I love it when you touch me like this. When you rub my clit between your two fingers. Do you want me to release your hands so you can touch me?"

Yes! I wanted to ravish her! But I couldn't say that. "If that would please you, Goddess," I answered her.

"It would please me for you to lean over and lick my nipple," she said as she continued jerking me off when one hand and rubbing herself with the other. I leaned towards her and sucked her nipple into her mouth, but she squeezed my penis too hard in response. "Lick me, I said. Not suck me." I corrected myself immediately, using only my tongue.

"Mmmm, yes, just like that," she said. "God, this feels good. I think I'm going to come again." That made me lick her more fervently. After a minute or two, I switched to her other breast and gave it the same attention. Sure enough, after a couple more minutes, she cried out, "Suck my tit now! Hard!" At the same time, she squeezed my penis too hard again. I actually loved it when she did that, almost as much as I loved hearing her come.

"Well, will you look at that," she said after she had come back down to earth. "You're ready to go again, tiger. I knew you had it in you. Just in time too, because I'm really ready to be fucked by you. Hard. Give me all you've got, sunshine."

How was I already hard again? I'd always been able to recover quickly, but never this quickly. There was just something about Ana as a Domme that did it for me. I obeyed her without comment, and in only a few minutes, she was screaming out my name. God, I loved the way she moaned when she came. I wanted to make her come at least twice by fucking her like this, but before I could, she commanded me to come, and I didn't disappoint her.

"Three!" I called out as I emptied myself inside her.

She had to catch her breath before she was able to respond to me. "Half way there," she finally managed. "Time for a break."

"A break?" I asked dumbly.

"Mmm hmm. A break." She unbound my hands and said, "But first, let's go shower. I want us both to come again in the shower. Then, we'll go eat dinner."

Actually, she came twice in the shower, and I made it to number four. After our shower, she dried me off and told me, "I brought you a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. I doubted you'd think that far ahead. We're dressing down for dinner tonight. I want easy access to you." As she spoke, she slipped another one of my t-shirts over her own head, no bra, and she put on a pair of yoga shorts, sans panties.

"What?" she asked when she noticed me smirking at her.

"Nothing, Goddess," I answered, I thought wisely.

"Uh uh," she said. "You don't get to do that. Answer me. What's that smirk about?"

"I really like seeing you in my t-shirt," I answered. "And I like that we're so dressed down for dinner. It isn't normal for me, and I like it."

She smirked back at me. "Well, I wanted us to stay completely naked, but we can't. We have Gail and Taylor here, and whoever else you have working tonight, and then we have Leila and Christina and all their staff, and my security staff, all next door. So unfortunately, we had to put on enough clothes to be decent. I'm not happy about it though. But we'll get naked again soon enough. You still have two more orgasms to go before the night is over."

I laughed. My God, she made me happy. "Thank you, Goddess," I told her. Then I asked, "Just to be clear... are we still in a scene while we're having dinner?"

"Absolutely," she answered. "Are you ready to obey me in front of your staff?"

"This should be interesting," I responded.

"Fun, Christian. That's what it is."

"Yes, Goddess," I agreed. She was right. It was a hell of lot of fun. Subbing had never been fun for me before. It had been torture. But nothing about this experience with Ana was anything close to torturous. I didn't know I was capable of enjoying myself this much while not being the one in control.

As we made our way into the dining room, Ana held my hand. Gail had our dinner ready, and she brought it to us as soon as we sat down. Ana asked her to bring us some white wine.

I waited for Ana before I started eating. I wasn't sure what she had meant when she said we were still in a scene. Would she want to feed me? She answered my unspoken question when she picked up my fork and brought the food to my lips. "You have such a sexy mouth, Christian."

As I chewed my food, I had time to ask myself how I should respond. I knew how she wanted me to, but did I want to do that in front of Gail, who had just walked into the room with our wine? Well, hell. Yes, I did.

"Thank you, Goddess," I answered submissively. Across the room, Gail dropped a wine glass that she'd been wiping. Thankfully, it didn't break. She muttered an apology before she quickly poured our wine for us and left the room. But I caught a slight smile on her face before she turned away from us.

When we were alone, Ana said, "Good job, tiger," and she gave me another bite of the delicious food Gail had prepared.

"Am I pleasing you, Goddess?" I asked her when my mouth was empty.

"Very much," she answered. "Have I told you today that I love you?"

"You have, but I never get tired of hearing it," I answered.

"I love you, Christian," she said. "I love you when you're my submissive. I didn't expect you to be this good at it. And I love you when you're my master, and I'm ready to switch back whenever you are. I love you when you're my fiancee. My fiancee, Christian! I love you when you're my friend. I love you when you're my business role model. I love you when you're Christina's father. I love you when you're Elliot and Mia's brother, and Grace and Carrick's son. I love everything about you, Christian Grey."

"Holy shit, Ana," I responded. "How am I supposed to top that?"

"You're not," she reminded me. "You're not supposed to top anything right now, and you just earned another punishment. Unless, of course, you are ready to switch. I'll kneel at your feel any time."

"I'm kind of enjoying kneeling at yours right now," I told her.

She smirked at me and said, "OK, then. Kneel." When I knelt in front of her, she brought my glass of wine to my lips and gave me a sip. Then she fed me another bite of dinner. I was probably half way through my plate that she'd been feeding me, and she still hadn't taken a bite.

When I'd swallowed my food, I asked, "Goddess, may I speak?"

"Of course you can," she answered. "You don't need my permission while we're having dinner. I want to talk with you."

"OK, thank you, Goddess," I said. "Please remember to eat. If it would please you, I would be happy to feed you too."

"I'll eat, Christian. Don't worry. Now, tell me about your afternoon," she answered. Then she took a bite, so I felt better.

Just at that moment, Taylor cleared his throat the way he always does when he feels the need to get my attention.

I groaned to myself before I looked towards the door where he was standing, staring at me in shock, and asked, "What is it, Taylor?"

"Sir... Hyde is... gone. We had two guys on him, and Ms. Steele, excuse me, ma'am, had another two. None of them saw him leave, but they have confirmed he isn't there. They've tracked his cell, but it is still in his apartment. He's in the wind, sir. And ma'am.

Ana spoke first, "Taylor, how many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me fucking 'ma'am'?"

Taylor looked flustered. "Yes, right. Sorry, Ms. Steele. Ana."

"Thank you, Taylor," I said. "Let us know if there's anything new to report. That will be all."

"No," Ana interrupted before Taylor could leave. "What is being done to find him?"

"Barney and Samantha are still tracking his online activity. But he's obviously found a way to get around them. We're checking with airlines, car rentals, bus stations... so far nothing. We will keep searching."

"OK, thanks, Taylor," said Ana.

"Yes, ma... Ana." Taylor responded, and then he left abruptly.

Ana smiled down at me and said, "Well, I think you just shocked the hell out of your CPO, tiger."

I smiled at her. "I think you're right," I agreed.

"Anyway, let's try not to think about fucking Hyde right now. You didn't tell me about your afternoon yet," she reminded me.

"I did as you asked," I told her. "Finished up a few things at work and cancelled my meetings the rest of the afternoon." Went by the jewelry store and picked up her engagement ring, but of course I didn't tell her that. "I got home fairly early, but Leila wanted to talk."

"Did she see the news?" Ana asked.

"Unfortunately, yes," I answered. "She wants to speak out. To tell the truth, she said. So the world will know I'm not the monster I look like."

"You sound like you don't like that idea," Ana observed.

"I hate that idea," I admitted. "But I agreed to it. I had to. She said it was her dying wish. To clear her guilty conscience or some shit like that."

"It's not shit," Ana corrected me. "She does feel guilty, and she should. That video would have never made it into Hyde's hands if Leila hadn't recorded it without your knowledge and then given it to Elena."

"No, but one of the other twelve would have, and I wouldn't have known about them if not for Leila. I would have still been friends with the evil bitch. And I wouldn't have been open to this kind of relationship with you. I would have never found out about Isaac and the other boys."

"I don't want you thinking about all that right now," Ana said as she gave me another bite of food. "Back to Leila speaking out. Did you tell her about the interview tomorrow?"

"I did," I answered. "She promised she'd be here."

"That's good," Ana said thoughtfully. "I need to tell Kate." She got up and went into the other room but came back in just a few seconds with her phone, which she was typing into. She spoke as she continued to type. "Franco is coming at 7 a.m. to do my hair and make-up. He will have plenty of time to do Leila's too. I'm asking him to bring a wig for her. I think she will feel more comfortable being seen by the world looking more like herself, the way she looked before she got sick. And it will help your case more too if she's... recognizable. It's too bad she's lost so much weight. But I'm sure the news about her cancer will also come out in the interview."

"Unfortunately, yes. I'm sure it will. As will the story about Christina. How could it not? I really wanted to protect her identity a bit longer, but now I have to appear like a family guy."

"Christian, you ARE a family guy," Ana insisted. "Have you been watching yourself this week?"

I sighed. "I haven't really been thinking about it, Ana. I mean Goddess. I've just been trying to be her father."

"And succeeding," Ana added. "I'm very proud of you, Christian, and I'm happy to be doing it with you. This interview is going to be a good thing, and everything is going to turn out OK. This isn't going to cause any great harm to GEH."

"I'm glad you're so optimistic," I told her. "But honestly, I don't really care anymore."

"Christian?" she questioned.

"OK, that's a lie. I do care. I care about the thousands of people who'd lose their jobs if GEH failed. But for me personally... I could retire today and live on my savings for the rest of my life... very comfortably. All I care about is you and my daughter. I was terrified earlier today that I'd lose you both. I could survive losing GEH. I built it, and I know how to do it now, so I could build another company. But I could never survive losing you."

Ana had tears in her eyes, which she blinked away. Her voice was cloudy as she responded, "Well, it's a good thing you're never going to lose me then. You're never going to lose either of us. Speaking of which... let's go see our daughter. It's almost her bedtime."

After we'd read Christina a bedtime story and tucked her into bed, we spoke with Leila shortly. Ana was so good with her, telling her about Franco and their morning make-over that she had planned. Leila repeated her promise to be there, and she thanked me for allowing her to speak. I hoped more than anything that her speaking out would not only ease her conscience but also stop all the speculations about me in the media.

Back in my penthouse, Ana asked, "What's it going to be, sunshine? Are you ready to play some more with your Goddess, or would you rather take back the control? Master?" she added seductively.

And just like that, I was hard... again. But I answered her, "Neither. Can we go sit in the living room?"

She looked confused as she followed me into the living room and sat next to me on the sofa. "But Christian, I still owe you a punishment and two orgasms."

I laughed at her. God, she made me so happy. "OK, how about this?" I asked her. "We will go back into the playroom in a few minutes, and you can top me again. I want that punishment and those two orgasms, princess. But first, there's something I want to ask you."

She looked at me patiently, waiting for my question. I felt so nervous all of a sudden. Slowly, without losing eye contact with her, I slipped onto one knee in front of her and held out the ring box, which I'd been able to get from its hiding place when Ana had gone to the bathroom earlier. Her look of surprise was exactly what I'd been expecting. And she looked so fucking happy. That was a good sign, right?

"Ana," I began.

"Yes!" she interrupted me. There were tears in her eyes, but she was smiling.

I laughed happily before I continued. "Well, good, but can I say this? Please?"

She nodded and whispered, "I love it when you beg."

I slipped the ring on her finger as I continued what I'd wanted to say. "I love you, Ana. I love you, princess. I love you, kitten. I love you, friend. I love you, Goddess. I love you, Anastasia Steele. I love everything about you, and I would be honored if you gave me the privilege to tell you that I love you, fiancee, and I love you, wife. I hadn't planned to do this tonight. I had an elaborate plan worked out for the weekend. Hearts and flowers and all that romantic bullshit that I'm sure you would have loved. We'll still do it, because I love you, and I want to make you happy. But after seeing how you topped me tonight, and then seeing you with Christina and Leila... Ana, you amaze me. Absofuckinglutely amaze me. I know you've already said yes earlier today, and then again just now. But I couldn't wait another minute for you to wear the ring that says that you're mine. Ana, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

There were tears streaming down her face now, but she was laughing. "That was perfect, Christian. Yes, yes, one hundred times yes."

"Why are you crying?" I asked her as I brushed away her tears as tenderly as possible.

"How are you not?" she asked. "I just agreed to marry you, Christian, for the second time today."

"Yes, and I'm the happiest man in the world right now, Ana."

She looked at her hand, admiring the ring I'd just put on her finger. "This is a beautiful ring. It's perfect, Christian. It is exactly what I would have picked out myself. How did you do that? And when...? When did you have time?"

"Shhh..." I said, putting my finger over her lips. "Too many questions, princess. I just have one for you."

"I already said yes," she responded.

"Not that one. Another one," I said.

"It's still my turn to top," she said, "but I can't get back into character until we go back to the playroom. God, Christian, being your Goddess is exhausting. Fun, but exhausting. But if you're ready to switch back..."

I interrupted her. "That's not what I wanted to ask you either, and I haven't forgotten, Goddess."

"What did you want to ask me?" she asked.

"When do you want to get married?" I asked.

"Do we need to set a date?" she asked. "I thought... maybe we can get used to being engaged first?"

"No," I shook my head. "Not good enough. I want to marry you, Ana. The sooner the better. I want you to be my wife. Hell, if I thought I could get away with it, I'd fly us to Vegas tonight. We could get married tomorrow."

"No!" she shouted, but there was laughter in her voice. "There's no way in hell that I'm going to get married in Vegas at a drive-through chapel by an Elvis impersonator. I want a wedding, Christian. Not a big one. Just family and close friends. We need time to plan that."

"How much time would it take to plan it?" I asked.

"I believe most people take at least a year to plan their weddings," she suggested.

"A year! No fucking way!" I responded, shocking her a little. "I was thinking more like a month."

"A month!?" she exclaimed. "You can't be serious! OK, six months."

I considered that for a moment. Nope, still not good enough. "Three months," I agreed.

"Four," she countered.

"Agreed," I said. I could deal with waiting four months for her.

"Four months," she repeated. "It's not much time, but we can work with it. The first thing we need is a venue. And a wedding planner. A good one. Someone who will know how to deal with the media. We need to hire someone who usually works with celebrities."

"OK, whatever you want," I told her. "I'll pay for everything, and there's no limit on what we can spend."

"Christian... need I remind you that I have money too? I don't really care which one of us pays for what. We both obviously can afford anything we want. What about a destination wedding? You know I own property in Hawaii, right?"

"Yes, I knew that," I answered. "Do you want to get married in Hawaii?"

"I don't know," she replied. "Maybe. Can we think about it?"

"Of course," I answered. "But right now... I just have one request."

"What's that?" she asked.

I smiled and answered, "Please punish me, Goddess."


	33. Chapter 33: The Interview, Part 1 (APOV)

**Chapter 33: The Interview, Part 1 (Anastasia's POV)**

"Magnifico!" Franco cried out cheerfully as he looked at Leila in the mirror. I had to agree with him. She looked radiant.

Christian and I had already met with our legal teams earlier that morning; we'd called a 6:00 breakfast meeting, and they'd all shown up. They'd gone over all the things we were allowed to say and what they strongly advised us not to say.

The wild bundle of energy that is my friend and the new executive manager of Ismintis Beauty Line, Franco Bianchi, had arrived at around 7:00 bearing pastries from what had been our favorite French Bakery when we had been classmates in our MBA program. Leila had shown up just as our meeting with the lawyers ended, and when Franco strolled in to Christian's penthouse, she was seated at the breakfast bar pretending to eat a bowl of oatmeal. I knew for a fact that she hadn't taken a single bite. But when Franco began to fawn over her, insisting that she try a pastry, she actually took a few bites of one. It turns out that he had been working for Elena when Leila had been Christian's sub, so he had done her hair a few times. They remembered each other well, and they hit it off right away.

When we started to go into my penthouse to start our make-overs, Franco took my hand, and that's when he noticed my ring. "Damn, girl! What is this rock on your hand! You've been holding out on me! You and Mr. Sexy got engaged?"

I smiled widely. "We did, just last night," I admitted.

"Damn!" Franco cried, smiling at me happily. "Lucky bitch! Congratulations!"

"Thanks, Franco," I said.

Leila was quiet until we got to my master bathroom, where we were doing the makeover. She sat down on the chair at my make-up table, looked up at me, and said, "Congratulations, Ana. I didn't see the ring until Franco noticed it, but I'm happy for you. I know... I'm glad this happened now, while I'm... while I am... here. If you and Christian are married, then I know that Christina will have two parents... who are together. Every child needs that. And... I want him to be happy. And you. I want you both to be happy."

"Thank you, Leila," I said genuinely. I knew it had taken her great effort to say all of that. "You can be sure that Christina has three parents who love her dearly."

I pulled in another chair from the bedroom so Leila could sit and watch while Franco did my make-up. My hair didn't take much time because I insisted on wearing in up in my usual business look, even though Franco all but begged me to wear it down. Only Christian could have convinced me to wear it down though, and he was busy in his office preparing for the interview. Kate had sent us all a list of interview questions late last night, which I had read through when I'd gotten up at 5 a.m.

During her own makeover, Leila had been very shy at first, but Franco used his charm on her, and by the time her make-up was done, she was giggling. I was sad to realize that it was the first time I'd heard her laugh, and it was nice. I made a new goal then to try to make her laugh more often. She really did look lovely with her face made up. She was naturally beautiful, but the dark shadows under her eyes and her pale sickly skin detracted from her beauty. Franco had worked his magic, and Leila was smiling. She actually looked happy.

When Franco showed her the wig, Leila cried a little. It looked so much like the long, thick mane of dark brown hair that she'd had before she lost it to cancer. I'd seen enough of the video; I knew what she'd looked like when she'd been Christian's sub. And I could see from her reaction now that her hair had been important to her. She wasn't sure at first that she wanted to wear the wig. She said it made her feel weird, but I suspected that she felt afraid to look too much like her old self, afraid of the memories it would evoke. In spite of her fears, Franco got her to try it on, telling her that if she didn't like it, then she could take it off and wear a scarf instead. He promised either way that she would look just as lovely.

Once the wig was in place and styled to perfection, and Franco repeated, "Magnifico!" Leila just stared at herself in the mirror.

"I look beautiful," she said, sounding shocked. Then she smiled at Franco and said, "I don't think I've ever looked this good, even when I was healthy."

"I seriously doubt that, love," Franco responded. "A woman of your natural beauty? I'm sure you haven't had a day in your life when you weren't absolutely gorgeous. You just look ready for the camera now."

Leila laughed. "Now you're just kissing ass," she told Franco. It was good to see her this relaxed.

"OK, wardrobe!" Franco announced. I had already determined which business suit I was wearing. I knew the deep plum color was flattering on me. But I wanted to find something in my closet that would work for Leila since the only clothes she had were too casual. The smallest thing I had was a size 4, and I was sure it would be too large for her, but maybe we could make it work. I pulled out a lavender dress with a belted waist and long flowing skirt. With Franco's help, we got rid of the dress's belt that was too large for her and used another one that we could adjust to fit her better. I paired the dress with some low-heeled pumps that were about half a size too large for her, but we decided it would work since she didn't need to walk around much. Finally, she looked really good, and it was easy to see from the expression on her face that she knew it and felt it.

"My work here is done," Franco announced. "You both look simply ravishing. Now, go save your man." He winked at me, and then kissed my cheek, and then Leila's. Then he made his way to my elevator.

I checked the time. "We need to get back over to Christian's," I told Leila. She suddenly looked really nervous. "Relax, Leila. You look beautiful."

"Thank you, Ana," she said. "For everything. I just hope this goes well."

"It will," I assured her.

When we went back over to Christian's penthouse, he was chatting with Kate in the living room, where the camera crew had already set up. He looked up and saw me first, and he smiled appreciatively before he got to his feet, came over, and kissed my lips chastely. Only then did he notice Leila, and his eyes just about bugged out of his head.

"Leila, holy shit!" he muttered. "You look... wow!"

Leila blushed crimson and couldn't look at him. It seemed that she also lost her ability to speak.

"Relax," I whispered to her. "It's going to be OK."

She nodded at me, but she still avoided looking at Christian.

"Well, let's get this show on the road," Kate announced to the room. "Ana and Christian, come sit over here on this sofa. And Leila, you sit in that chair right there."

"I'm sorry," Leila said. "I just need the restroom. I won't be long."

"Do you need help?" I asked her.

"No, I'm fine. Really. I'll be right back." She ran out of the room as quickly as she was physically able.

"Is she OK?" Christian asked worriedly.

"Just flustered," I told him.

"She couldn't even look at me," he muttered sadly.

"Of course she couldn't," I said dryly. "You complimented her appearance."

Christian looked confused. "Was that wrong? She looks... angelic."

"No, it wasn't wrong. You're doing fine, Christian," I assured him. "It's just... surely you realize that she still has feelings for you. That's all it is."

Kate had been studying her notes, but she looked up and exclaimed, "Holy shit! What the hell is that?!" I looked at her confusedly, but then I saw that she was looking at my hand with wide eyes.

"Oh! Right!" I answered. Then I laughed and said, "Well, what does it look like, Kate? Christian asked me to marry him, and I said yes."

"And you were going to tell me... when?" she asked in a high-pitched voice that almost hurt my ears.

"Sorry, Kate. I kind of got... distracted."

She smirked at me and said, "Well, I'm glad you're at least taking my advice, I just wasn't expecting it this soon. Oh, and for what it's worth, I knew he was going to propose to you. Elliot told me."

I smirked at her right back, "So that's what that was all about, when you kept bringing up marriage. Hey, we could have a double wedding," I joked.

"No!" Kate and Christian answered simultaneously.

"You're not serious, princess," Christian said. "Oh, I have a better idea. How about a triple wedding? Mia and Leo are probably not far behind us in getting engaged."

"Is that Christian Grey being sarcastic?" Kate asked, feigning shock.

"There are a lot of things about me that might surprise you when you get to know me better, Madame Kate," Christian muttered so that only Kate and I could hear him. I recognized their ribbing each other for what it was. Christian wasn't being flirtatious.

Kate responded conspiratorially, also in a low voice, "What, that you enjoy being tied up and at Ana's mercy almost as much as she enjoys being at yours?" She arched her eyebrow the way she does. "Hey, maybe Elliot's idea to play together wasn't such a bad idea after all, now that I know you're capable of submission."

I had just taken a sip of water, which I promptly got strangled on. Christian patted me on the back while he responded to Kate in the same low conspiratorial voice that she had used, "There's no fucking way in hell that is ever going to happen, Kate." He was smirking and shaking his head, so I knew he wasn't angry.

Finally, I found my voice, even though it sounded a bit strangled. "Kate... you are kidding, right?"

She laughed and assured me, "Relax, Ana. I promised you that neither Elliot nor I wanted to fuck you, and that still stands. Christian on the other hand... well..." She laughed again and said, "I just really like jerking his chain. Not like you do though, obviously." She winked at me.

I felt myself blushing, but I was able to respond firmly to Kate, "Don't you think we should be mentally preparing for this interview instead of getting distracted like this? Why are you doing this? You know Christian needs to focus."

Christian put his arm around me and whispered in my ear, "Easy there, tigress. Kate's just trying to loosen me up." He looked at Kate and said, "It didn't work, but nice try."

Kate smirked back at him and responded, "Well, it was either that or that bottle of Macallan you have over there, and I thought it best if you're not drunk for this interview."

Before Christian could respond, Leila came back into the room. "I'm sorry for the delay, but I'm OK now."

"Are you sure, Leila?" Christian asked. "You really don't have to do this."

"No, I want to," she insisted, finally looking Christian in the eyes for the first time today. "I have to."

"No, you don't have to," Christian insisted just as strongly. "But if you really want to, I won't stop you. And I really appreciate it."

"Are we ready to start then?" Kate asked, all professional now.

"Ready when you are," Christian responded.

Leila looked at Kate and nodded. Kate reminded us of a few things she had already communicated by email. "OK, just to confirm... even though I know you prefer to be referred to publicly as Mr. Grey, I will refer to you as Christian. We need to bring you down a notch, make you seem more personable. Are you OK with that?"

"Yes," Christian said, even though he looked like he was anything but OK with that."

Kate went on, "And we're calling Ana Ana and Leila Leila. No Ms. Steele or Ms. Williams. All agreed?"

When we all agreed, Kate continued. "So, we will start with Christian's success. The building of GEH. Basic shit that everyone pretty much already knows. Then we'll get to your relationship with Ana. Do you want to announce your engagement?"

I looked at my hand and said, "Well, it's kind of hard to hide this rock." My ring was simple and classy, but the diamond was huge. It had to be at least eight carats.

"Yes, I want the world to know that she's going to be Mrs. Christian Grey," Christian said. I decided that this was not the time to tell him that I didn't plan to change my name.

"OK, then we'll do that, and after that, we'll address the video. Just to confirm, you are coming out about BDSM, right? Both of you?"

"It would be kind of hard not to, don't you think, Kate?" Christian responded dryly.

"Wow, sarcasm twice in one morning. You're on a role there, Sir," Kate quipped.

"Yes, we're both coming out," I answered her, ignoring her ribbing Christian again. "I don't want to get into any details or anything. It's nobody's business. But we have to admit to it or else this media storm will never go away."

Kate continued, "So, Christian, I got your message that you don't want to talk about how you got started, or how you contracted your subs through... the bitch troll. I understand that you don't want to mention that woman's name. Or anything about the FBI investigation. But we will talk about your involvement in BDSM, and that will lead to the video. Then, this will be where Leila comes in. Are you OK with that, Leila?"

"Yes, absolutely," Leila answered.

"OK, so Leila will describe what was actually happening in the video. Remember not to mention the name of the person you sold it to."

"Why not?" Leila asked. "She's dead. What does it matter?"

Christian explained, "The FBI is investigating several people who had ties with her. If we out her, even though she's dead, it could alert them and drive them further underground, so it will be harder for the Feds to catch them."

"Really? Wow, I didn't know any of that," Leila said innocently. "Was she doing something illegal?"

"I'll explain later," Christian told her, trying to get us back on track of the interview.

Kate continued, "I never got a straight answer from either of you concerning your daughter." She smiled proudly when she added, "My niece, actually. Are we going to talk about her, or do you want to keep her a secret?"

Christian sighed. I could see how much it pained him to say the next few words. "I think we have to mention her, at least briefly. Otherwise, when the news does leak about her, it will look like we were trying to cover her up. And I'm not ashamed of her. Not at all. But I don't want her to be in any of the photo shoots. I want to keep her face out of the media as long as possible."

"OK, then I think we've covered all the basics. Are we ready?" Kate asked.

When we all nodded, Kate got the camera crew's attention, and thirty seconds later, she began the interview. Kate welcomed the viewers to Christian's penthouse. The first ten minutes or so were all about Christian, just as Kate had explained. Leila and I were off camera. Then, after they'd chatted about the beginnings and rapid success of GEH, Kate transitioned into Christian's personal life, and I knew my turn was coming up.

Kate said, "It's interesting that until recently, there have been no pictures of you in the media with a woman... except for a few with your mother or sister. But just a couple of weeks ago, pictures of you with Anastasia Steele started appearing. The two of you made a public announcement that you were just friends. And then just a few days later, you announced that you were dating. What's the story there, Christian?"

Christian smiled adorably. "The story there is that I am in love. Head over heels in love with Anastasia Steele."

Kate raised her eyebrows, like she was surprised at this news, and asked, "And how about Ana? Does she feel the same way?"

Christian nodded, "I think she does, but why don't you ask her yourself?"

Kate smiled widely as she looked at the camera and said, "I think I'll do just that. Joining us now is Anastasia Steele, CEO of Ismintis International, and as we've just heard, the love interest of Christian Grey." Kate looked at me and said, "Ana, you heard my question, so what do you say? Are you in love with Christian Grey?"

"I am," I answered. I reached over, took Christian's hand, and smiled at him reassuringly. "Absolutely, head over heels."

Kate continued, "Ana, I can't help but notice a piece of jewelry on your left ring finger. Do you want to tell us what that is?"

I held up my hand, which I'm sure the camera was zooming in on, and said, "It's an engagement ring. Christian asked me to marry him last night, and I said yes." Shit! I just remembered that I hadn't told my dad yet. I didn't want him to find out from the media. Hopefully, there would be time to call him before the interview aired.

"She said yes," Christian repeated proudly. He smiled at me, that panty-dropping smile that gets me every time.

Kate smiled happily at both of us and asked, "So when is the big day?"

Christian answered, "We haven't set a date yet, and when we do, we will be keeping that information private."

I added, "We want to have a small, intimate ceremony with only family and close friends."

"Oh, come on," Kate said, "The great Christian Grey and amazing Anastasia Steele, two of the most successful people in the country, and both based right here in Seattle. Why don't you throw a lavish celebration? Everyone knows you can afford it."

I smiled but shook my head negatively. "Our wedding is something we want to share with the people who know us well, who love us. There will be other occasions when we can involve the general public, like when we are bringing attention to some of the causes that are important to us. Like Christian's campaign to make sure low-income families have access to locally-grown fresh produce."

"Or Ana's educational programs for girls in developing countries," Christian added.

"So tell me," Kate shifted directions, "Now that the two of you are merging your personal lives, should we also expect a merging of your two great companies?"

"No," we both answered simultaneously. Then we glanced at each other and laughed. Christian continued, "GEH will continue, business as usual."

"As will Ismintis International," I added. "Christian and I want to see each other's companies continue to grow and become more successful, not just for ourselves but for the thousands of people who work for us. We haven't even considered the idea of merging. It's not something either of us is interested in."

"Not at all," Christian agreed.

Kate nodded, but then she looked thoughtful. "You know, there has been a lot of speculation in the media about both of you. Until two weeks ago, the world wondered if the two of you might be gay. And now... this is all very sudden. Are you two covering for each other?" Kate looked Christian in the eye and asked, "Be honest, Christian... Is Ana actually your beard?"

Christian chuckled, but I could tell that he was actually really tense. "Kate, I think it's safe to say after that video that's gone viral, the whole world knows I'm not gay."

I didn't think it was time yet to get into the video, so I quickly jumped in. "And as for me, if I were a lesbian, then I would own it. There's no shame in it. This is the twenty-first century, for goodness sake. I wouldn't have anything to gain from faking a relationship with Christian. If I wanted to be with a woman, I'd be with a woman. But I don't. I want to be with Christian."

"Well, I'm happy for both of you," Kate said. "So, tell me how it happened. Ana, how did you and Christian meet?"

I knew this was coming. I had suggested to Kate that I should be the one to introduce the topic of BDSM, to detract the negative attention from Christian, and Kate had agreed. Now, this was my opening. "Well, I've known OF Christian for several years. I studied his business model, first at Stanford, and then more deeply when I was getting my MBA here in Seattle. He was actually my idol, from a business perspective. I followed all of his advice. I modeled Ismintis International after GEH. But I had never met him in person, not until a couple of weeks ago. I attended an informal event, and I met him there. And there were sparks between us from the start."

"What kind of event was it, Ana?" Kate pushed.

OK, here we go. "It was a munch. A munch is an informal gathering for people who are interested in BDSM. I've been interested in it for several years, but this was my first time to attend such an event. Christian was there. I didn't recognize him, but we hit it off."

"Why didn't you recognize him?" Kate asked, as if she hadn't been there and didn't already know all of this story firsthand.

I took a sip of water before I responded, "We were wearing masks. It was a masked event. In BDSM, people often want to protect their identities, so I felt more comfortable attending such an event."

"So what exactly is BDSM?" Kate asked innocently, as if she didn't know intimately and in fine detail exactly what BDSM was. I wished she'd answer her own question, because I was certain she could articulate it so much better than I could.

"Bondage and dominance, sadism and masochism," I answered in my professional, unattached voice. Christian squeezed my hand in encouragement. Or was it for his own encouragement? He needed it as much as I did. "Personally, I'm more interested in bondage and dominance, not so much in sadism and masochism."

Kate turned to Christian and asked, "What about you, Christian? Was this your first BDSM event too?"

"No," he answered.

"So you've attended other BDSM events?" she clarified.

"Yes," Christian answered.

"Can you tell me more about those events, and your involvement in BDSM?" Kate asked.

"Yes," Christian answered again. He hesitated, but then he explained, "You have to understand... I'm a very private person, and I have never talked publicly about something so private. This is my private life, and I was under the impression that it would stay private." He sighed, but then continued. "I've been in the lifestyle since I was in my teens. I've been to more BDSM events than I can count. But I mostly... practice it... in private."

Kate nodded and then questioned, "You said 'in the lifestyle.' Are you saying that BDSM is a lifestyle?"

"That is exactly what it is," Christian answered. "It's a way of life that people who are not in the lifestyle don't understand. That's the reason those of us who are in the lifestyle don't talk about it publicly. We don't expect others to understand."

"But you're talking publicly about it now," Kate observed.

"Yes, because I don't seem to have a choice," Christian responded dryly.

"What do you mean?" Kate asked.

"I mean that the whole world has now seen a video of me doing something very private, and they have jumped to some pretty far-fetched conclusions."

"Let's talk about that," Kate responded. "I've seen the video in question myself. It looked to me like you were beating the hell out of that poor woman before you forced yourself on her."

"I'm sure it did look that way to most people," Christian replied. "I watched the video myself and I noticed the same thing. I was disgusted with myself for how it looked. But I also remember what really happened, and I know for a fact that I didn't do anything to the woman in the video that she didn't want me to do."

"Are you saying she WANTED you to beat her and then force her to have sex with you?" Kate asked incredulously.

"Yes," Christian answered with a nod. "That is exactly what I am saying. I'm not confessing to rape, which is what you're making it sound like. It was consensual."

"Why would any woman WANT to be beaten and... brutalized like that?" Kate asked innocently.

"Because she's a masochist," Christian answered matter-of-factly. "And I enjoyed it because I was a sadist, at least in the BDSM context."

"A sadist in the BDSM context?" Kate sounded dumbfounded, even though I knew damn well that she was a sadist too. "What does that even mean?" she asked innocently.

Christian sighed before he cleared his throat and answered, "Keep in mind, I'm talking about an alternative lifestyle, not a psychological disorder. I've never enjoyed hurting people in general. I enjoy control. In the context of BDSM, I have control over my submissive. I can do anything I want, and she enjoys it. It's a safe environment. I find out beforehand what her limits are, and I honor them. We use safewords, and if I do anything she doesn't like, she uses her safeword, and we stop."

"Is Ana your submissive?" Kate asked.

"No," Christian answered.

"Sometimes," I corrected.

"Ana," Christian admonished me. He turned to Kate and answered, "Ana is so much more. She is my fiancee, and she is going to be my wife. I never thought I was capable of loving anyone, but she has turned my life upside down. She is my everything."

"But just to set the record straight," I added, "We do like to play on occasion. Some people in BDSM have full-time power exchange relationships. We aren't like that. We have to agree on when we play, but when we do, I enjoy it. A lot."

"You enjoy being beaten?" Kate asked curiously.

"No, not really," I answered. "I don't enjoy pain. I told Christian that from the beginning, and he understood. I do enjoy other aspects of BDSM though."

"Like...?" Kate pushed.

I felt my face heat, so I knew I was blushing. "Umm... that's private."

"Has Christian beaten you?" Kate asked bluntly.

"Umm... I don't think I would call it that," I answered. "He certainly hasn't done anything like what you saw in that video. What he has done has been more sensual than painful."

"So, you enjoyed it?" she asked.

"Yes, very much so," I answered.

"So, Anastasia Steele enjoys being spanked," Kate remarked snarkily.

"Hey, she was the one spanking me last night," Christian quipped. I stared at him in shock. I couldn't believe he had just revealed that.

"Oh, really?" Kate said curiously. "But, I mean, look at you and then look at her. You're clearly so much stronger than her. So, I'm sure you're much more capable of hurting her than she is of hurting you."

Christian smiled and answered casually, "Maybe so, but she's stronger than she looks. My ass is still sore."

I'm sure my face was beet red. "Christian!" I whispered angrily. He responded by squeezing my hand and smiling affectionately at me.

"So, Christian, about that video," Kate began. "I have so many questions. First, when was that?"

Christian cleared his throat and answered, "It was a little over two years ago."

"Did you have a habit of recording your... beatings?" Kate asked carefully.

"Never," Christian answered. "It was taken without my knowledge."

"So, if you didn't record it, then that leaves the woman in the video. Who was she?" Kate asked the question that everyone in the media had been speculating about.

Christian answered easily, even though I knew he didn't feel casual about it at all, "Her name is Leila Williams, and she was my submissive at the time."

"Leila Williams," Kate repeated. She looked back at the camera again and announced, "It just so happens that we also have here with us today, Christian's submissive from two years ago, the woman in the video, Leila Williams. Leila, thank you for joining us here today."

Leila sat up a little straighter and looked Kate in the eye. "Thank you for allowing me to be here to tell my story," she responded.

"So, tell me," Kate began, "Are you really the woman in the video with Christian that everyone is talking about?"

"Yes, I am," Leila confirmed.

"So, you were Christian's submissive?" Kate asked.

"Yes," Leila answered. "Two years ago. Our... agreement lasted about four months."

"So, you took the video?" Kate asked.

"Yes, without his knowledge. I broke our contract when I did that. He wasn't aware of it at the time."

"Contract?" Kate asked, feigning confusion.

"Yes," Leila answered. "As Christian explained earlier, BDSM is a lifestyle, and people in that lifestyle enter agreements with each other that are based on contracts. All of our limits and preferences... and all of the Dominant's rules... things like that, are all spelled out and agreed on beforehand."

"It's not an enforceable contract," Christian explained. "The purpose is to make sure there is clear communication between the Dominant and submissive, to build trust."

"OK," said Kate slowly. "So Leila, you and Christian had a contract that you both agreed to? Was part of that agreement for him to beat you?"

"Yes," Leila answered. "I wanted that. I enjoyed it. I was involved in BDSM because of my craving for that kind of pain. I was what people in the lifestyle refer to as a 'pain slut.' I know it sounds strange to anyone not involved in the lifestyle, but that is the God's honest truth. Christian never did anything to me that I didn't want him to. He honored our contract perfectly. I'm the one who broke it."

"Forgive me for sounding skeptical," Kate warned, "but to a lot of people, you sound like a crazy woman. How do we know you aren't here telling us a load of crap because the great Christian Grey is paying you? It would make sense for him to use you to try to save his own reputation. Maybe he paid you to let him beat the crap out of you and have forceable sex with you, and now he's paying you to lie about it."

"No!" Leila responded angrily. "That is not true! Christian wasn't my first Dom, but he was the best I've ever had! I have been in the lifestyle for over a decade, and I've been beaten by dozens of men... because I wanted it! If that sounds sick to you, well, all I can say is, mind your own damn business! If two consenting adults want to do something kinky that other people don't get, it's nobody's business but their own. I liked that kind of pain! I always did. And I don't really care what you or anyone else thinks about that. Christian was a very good Dom. I felt safe with him, always. Yes, he beat me, but he did it in a way that never left any lasting marks on my body. He knew what he was doing. I wanted... I had hoped... Christian was everything I wanted in a Dom."

"Wow, that sounds pretty convincing," said Kate, not sounding convinced at all. "But I have to confess I'm still confused about that video. If you felt that way about Christian, then why did you make the video, and why did you wait until now to release it?"

"I didn't release it," Leila said angrily. "I made a terrible mistake two years ago. I trusted the wrong person. She was actually the one who matched me with Christian. She introduced us. She asked me to make the video, and I thought at the time that I owed it to her, for some very foolish reason. I sold her the video right after I made it, two years ago. She is the reason that video is public knowledge now. I never would have betrayed Christian like that. Except I did betray him by making it in the first place. I regret... with all that is in me, I regret making that video." There were tears in Leila eyes, but she blinked them away and managed to avoid shedding any.

Christian cleared his throat, glanced at Kate, and then said quietly and tenderly to Leila, "Shhh... calm down, my friend. Don't wear yourself out. You know you can stop this anytime, right?" Damn it! I felt tears in my own eyes, and I blinked them away. I sure as hell wasn't going to cry on camera.

Kate had to clear her own throat. "Christian, you just referred to Leila as your friend. Is that true? Have you and Leila become friends?"

"Yes," Christian answered. "Leila is one of the best people I know, and I'm honored to call her my friend. She also happens to be the mother of my child, so yes, I would say we have a very important relationship."

Kate feigned shock again. "I'm sorry, did you just say... your child?!"

"That is exactly what I said," Christian answered. "My daughter."

Kate looked at Leila and asked, "When did that happen?"

"When Christian and I... umm... parted ways... I was about a month pregnant. I... He didn't know about her."

"Actually," Christian corrected, "Leila tried to tell me at the time, but I didn't believe her. I fu... I messed up there, not following up with her. I didn't believe her, and I missed out on my daughter's first year and a half of her life because of that."

Leila looked at Kate and said, "But he's in her life now, and he is a great father to her. That's what matters."

Kate turned to me and asked, "Ana, what's your take on all this? Were you shocked to find out he has a child?"

"Yes, to put it mildly," I answered. "But Leila is absolutely right when she says that Christian is a great dad. He reads to Christina every night. They've already bonded, even though they've only had a week together so far."

"Are you saying that you only found out about her... a week ago?" Kate asked.

"Yes, that's correct," Christian answered. "I was on a business trip in Paris, talking to Ana on the phone. She told me, and it was a shock. I didn't believe it. How could I not have known? But when I got home, here she was."

"How is it that Ana knew before you did?" Kate asked.

"Because I approached her," Leila answered. "I'd seen their photos in the gossip magazines. I thought Ana would be able to get a message to Christian. He was... inaccessible, to say the least. He has all these bodyguards that keep people away. Ana does too, but I got lucky and was able to approach her in a restaurant. I needed to make sure Christian knew about his daughter before it was too late."

Kate look concerned, even though she already knew about Leila's illness. "What do you mean, too late?"

"I was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was pregnant. It's progressed now. Stage four breast cancer and lymphoma too." Leila smiled sadly and added. "I'm a walking miracle. According to my doctors, I should have died months ago."

"I'm so sorry to hear that, Leila," Kate said sympathetically.

"I've made my peace with it, and now that I know Christian and Ana are going to take care of our daughter, I can... let go."

Damn it! I willed myself not to cry on camera again. Shit! I grabbed a tissue from the box on the table, and then passed the box to Leila. She smiled sadly back at me. Somehow, she was holding up.

Kate had to clear her throat before she could speak. "You said Christian... and Ana. Are you saying that Ana is going to... fill in for you... with your daughter?"

Leila nodded. Somehow, she was the only one of us who didn't look like she was about to break down. Even Christian was blinking, trying to hold back tears. Leila said, "I asked Ana a few days ago to adopt Christina. That was before they got engaged, but I knew that Ana would be a good mother to her. She already loves her. Now, they can be a family. Christina will have two parents who love her."

"Three," I corrected. "She will have three. You will always be her first mommy. We will make sure she knows that. She'll never forget you." I had to grab another tissue.

"Thank you, Ana," Leila answered. She was looking teary-eyed again.

Kate looked at the camera and said, "Cut! I think we need a break."

Christian said, "Yes, thanks, Kate." He looked at Leila and asked, "How are you feeling? You look wiped out. Do you need to go lie down?"

Leila didn't answer Christian. Instead, she asked Kate, "Have I answered all of your questions? I feel like I said everything I needed to, but if I'm still needed, I'll stay longer. Otherwise... Christian is right... I am tired."

"We're almost done here," Kate answered. "I think it will be fine if you want to go back to Ana's and go to bed."

"I'll help you," Christian offered. He got up and helped her out of the chair, and then led her towards my penthouse.

When they were out of earshot, I said to Kate, "Wow, that was intense."

"No shit," Kate agreed. "Leila was amazing though. I think she's going to save his hide. You too. Good job, as always. You do realize that you're going to be ripped apart as soon as this goes live, don't you?"

"That's what I'm expecting," I told her. "But what choice was there? I had to speak out for Christian."

"Of course you did," Kate agreed. "Anyway, let's think about something else. Let me see that rock on your finger again."

I held my hand up for her to see. "It's perfect. He did really good. I love it."

"Have you set a date yet?" Kate asked, knowing that if we had, we wouldn't have admitted it when she'd asked on camera.

"Not exactly," I answered. "We agreed to four months. I wanted to ask you... you will be my maid of honor, won't you?"

"Of course!" she answered, smiling widely, and blinking back tears. "Although... you're going to have to make it matron of honor. Elliot and I are going to get married sooner than that."

"Seriously?" I asked.

"Seriously," Kate answered. "Thanksgiving. In Fiji. I already booked it. My dream has always been to have a beach wedding, and Elliot fell in love with the resort I chose as soon as I showed him the pictures. Luckily, they had a cancellation, so I grabbed it while I could. Ana, you have to be my maid of honor too. Please!"

I laughed. "Kate, of course I will! I will clear my schedule to make sure I have a few days to spend with you beforehand. I'll make sure Christian does too."

"Yes, Elliot wants him to be best man, so you both are going to have to step away from ruling your empires for a few days."

"Holy crap, Kate," I said. "Thanksgiving is only a month away. Are you sure you're going to have everything planned by then?"

"The resort handles everything," Kate said. "I've already ordered all the catering, the cake, and the flowers. It's going to be so beautiful, Ana. My mom already gave me the dress she wore in her wedding, and it fits me like a glove. I've dreamed of wearing it since I was fifteen years old, and it needs almost no alterations at all. All that's left to do is send out invitations. I've booked a block of rooms already. We're inviting about a hundred and fifty people, but they won't all be able to come, of course. In fact, with such late notice to a destination wedding, I'll be surprised if even half of them make it."

"Well, I'll make sure one of my jets is available for you that week," I promised. "Christian will probably do the same, and I think he has one that's larger than either of mine."

"Thanks, Ana," Kate responded.

"What do your parents think?" I asked. "You have told them, haven't you?"

"Yes, and they think I'm crazy for moving so fast, but they adore Elliot. Dad wants me to slow down and have a long engagement, but I think that's a waste of time. Elliot does too. Elliot's parents get it better than mine do. Apparently, they had a pretty quick romance too. But I think they agree with my parents that we should have a longer engagement. But it's my life. And Elliot's, but he's a good submissive."

"That reminds me," I said. "Not Elliot's submission, but speaking of parents, I've got to call Ray before this interview airs. I can't have him find out from the media."

"Shit, Ana, does he know about the BDSM?" Kate asked.

I cocked my eyebrow and asked, "What do you think?"

"I think that's one conversation I'd never want to have," Kate said.

At that moment, Christian walked back into the room looking shell-shocked. He sat down, not really focusing on either of us.

"What's wrong, Christian?" I asked him, feeling a jolt of panic. "Is Leila OK?"

He didn't answer. Instead, he got up, crossed the room, and poured himself a shot of the whiskey that Kate had noticed earlier. He drank the shot, sat down the shot glass with a clunk, and came back over. When he sat down, he looked at me finally. He looked deeply disturbed.

"Christian, what is it?" I asked him again. "Did something happen with Leila?"

"Yes," he answered, but then he shook his head. "But not what you think. She's fine. The nurse took her blood pressure before she fell asleep. It was normal. She's sleeping now."

"So what happened?" I asked again.

Christian sighed and took my hand. He looked at my ring and then at my face. He didn't let go of my hand as he raised his other hand to his face, rubbed it, and then ran his fingers through his hair. Crap, something was really wrong.

"I just told Leila that I love her," he confessed.


	34. Chapter 34: The Interview, Part 2 (CPOV)

**Chapter 34: The Interview, Part 2 (Christian's POV)**

"You told Leila... WHAT!?" Kate shouted at me. She moved towards me aggressively. I wasn't sure if she was going to smack the shit out of me, or just get in my face and yell at me some more.

Ana stopped her from approaching me. Very calmly, she said, "Kate, I realize that we need to continue the interview, but Christian and I need to have a private conversation. Just give us a few more minutes, OK?"

Kate looked at Ana incredulously. "Did you hear what he just said to you?" she asked.

"I heard him, Kate," Ana answered, still just as calmly. "And I obviously understood him better than you did. Otherwise, you wouldn't be freaking the fuck out right now."

Kate looked confused. "Ana... the man you love... the man you just agreed to MARRY last night... just told you that he LOVES ANOTHER WOMAN. Seriously, Ana, I don't mind watching Elliot fuck other women as long as I'm in on it, but if he ever told he he'd fallen in love with one of them, I'd cut off his balls!"

Ana smirked. Actually fucking smirked. How was she not angry as hell at me? How was she not running for the hills? "Kate, for an award-winning journalist... who actually deserves another award for that job you just did a few minutes ago... you sure as hell don't listen well. Tell me this. What if, a few months from now, once I've gotten to know Elliot better, and once we're all married... you to Elliot, and me to his brother... and we're all a happy family... We all hang out together a lot, like family do, and we all really enjoy spending time with one another, and we trust each other like family... What if, after we've all grown in our relationships like that, I tell you that I love Elliot. What will you think of that?"

"Love him... how?" Kate asked cautiously.

"Great question, Kate!" Ana exclaimed in a tone that reminded me of my third grade social studies teacher. And then, she continued in an admonishing tone that still sounded like the same teacher. "I'm only wondering why you didn't to think to ask Christian that same question a minute ago instead of flying off the handle."

"Shit!" Kate muttered. "I hate it when you do that, Steele. You could have just told me what he meant." Kate turned to me and asked, "What did you mean? You love Leila... how?"

Ana didn't give me a chance to answer. "Kate, don't you think I am the one who should be asking the questions right now? So, will you please excuse us for a few minutes, so Christian and I can have this conversation in private? And will you just fucking trust me when I tell you that Christian is not in love with Leila. He never was. That's not what he meant. Will you just calm down and let me talk with him away from all these other ears?" She referred to the four members of Kate's camera crew, who were clearly eavesdropping.

Ana didn't give Kate a chance to respond. She grabbed my hand, and we escaped into our bedroom. Once we had closed the door, Ana asked, "Are you OK, Christian?"

I stared at her, not believing that she wasn't mad as hell. I knew she had the ability to keep her cool when in front of others, even under the most tense business dealings. But we were in private now, and she was still calm. I had expected her to either be angry or hurt, but she was neither. Her face showed only concern for me.

"How are you asking me if I'm OK?" I asked. "Are you? Ana, I fucking said those three words to LEILA! How are you OK with that?"

She still looked just as concerned and calm. "Christian, I've watched you over the past few days, and I listened to both of you in the interview this morning. I know how you feel about Leila, and I also know how she feels about you. And honestly, I think it's a good thing that you told her. For both of you."

"Ana... I've never even told my mom that I love her," I explained. I didn't know I was capable of loving anyone, even my parents. "You're the only one I've ever said those words to."

"Until now," Ana said gently. "Maybe it's time you change that. I'm sure Grace would love to hear it."

"She would, no doubt," I agreed. "But Ana... Leila was my... I didn't... I wasn't... Damn it! I didn't love her, Ana. I didn't love any of them."

"Not then, and it's not the same thing," Ana said. "Christian, I think you're freaked out because all these emotions are so new to you. But Christian, I know you weren't in love with her then, and you're not in love with her now."

"That's true, Ana," I promised her. "You're the only one for me. I don't love her like I love you. It's more like... I don't know... like Mia. Like a sister? But she's not my sister. She was my fucking submissive!" How could I possibly love her, especially like a sister?

"Christan, your feelings for her have changed over the past week. Two years ago, what you felt for her was probably not much more than sexual attraction. Now, I think it would be impossible for you to think of her that way, even after seeing how beautiful she looked today."

I agreed. "I didn't even think of her... like that. I thought she looked like an angel. There was nothing sexual about it."

Ana nodded, "I know, Christian. "Now, you see her as the mother of your child, and as a friend who probably just drug your reputation out of the gutter. And after the interview ended, you felt really emotional. You felt thankful for what she'd just done."

"True," I admitted. "But... I'm not really sure what came over me. I just... thought she needed to know that she... mattered. To me."

"I'm sure it meant the world to her, for you to admit that," Ana assured me. "You did well, Christian. It was one of the most compassionate things you could have done."

"And you're not... threatened? You're not jealous?" I asked cautiously.

"Of what, Christian?" Ana asked. "Leila is dying. How could I possibly be jealous of her? Her days are numbered, literally. If either of us has a reason to be jealous of the other, it's her of me. There are times... when she doesn't realize I see her... that she looks at me with so much hurt and envy. But she masks it quickly. Life has been really unfair to her. Her dream is dead already, and she knows it, so she's putting things together as best she can before she's gone."

"What do you mean?" I asked her confusedly. "What dream is dead? And how is she putting things together?"

"Christian... surely you realize how she feels about you. She loves you too. And I don't mean as a friend, or like a brother. She got pregnant on purpose, remember? She wanted a life with you. Now, I'm going to be your wife instead. She gave birth to your child, but now, I'm going to be that child's mother. It still amazes me that she asked me to adopt Christina. It shows just how strong she is, and how much she's wiling to give up to make sure that the people she loves will be OK after she's gone. Not that she has any choice in giving it up, but she could be really bitter about that instead of accepting me in your life and her daughter's life. But she isn't bitter. I'm not sure I would be that strong, if I were in her place."

Finally, Ana's words were making sense to me.

"Ana, do you think Leila thinks... Well, fuck, I did just tell her I love her. She probably thinks... But surely she knows you're it for me. She saw your ring, right?"

"Christian, stop worrying about it," Ana insisted. "What if she does think you are in love with her? So what? I don't think she does... I think she probably understood how you meant it, but what if she didn't? Does it matter?"

I thought about that for a moment. "No, I guess it doesn't," I answered.

"Are you OK now?" Ana asked me.

"Yes, I think I am," I answered.

"You've mentioned your therapist a few times... Dr. Flynn?" Ana asked.

"Yes," I affirmed.

"When is your next appointment with him? Or how soon can you see him?" she asked.

"I'll give him a call after we finish the interview," I promised her. "If he's free, he can fit me in today. He's used to seeing me without an appointment."

"That's good," Ana said. "I think you need to talk to him, the sooner the better. Your emotions are freaking you out, even though they're normal. They're obviously not normal for you."

She was right again. "Right, and I'm concerned that I'm getting so soft," I admitted. "I have a reputation as a hard ass, and I don't want to lose that."

"Christian, there's a time and place for everything," Ana explained. "In business, I think I can be just as hard-assed as you when the situation calls for it. But when we're talking about our personal lives, with the people we love, that's something entirely different."

"I guess I haven't always done a good job of separating the two," I confessed.

"Anyway... I think we're good here," Ana responded matter-of-factly. She went to her side of the bed and opened the drawer in the bedside table. "But, before we go back in there and finish the interview, I want to play with this." She smiled seductively as she held up the vibrating wand that had become one of our favorite toys. "I'm just not sure which way I want it. Do I want to kneel? Or do I want you to kneel? I don't know. Maybe you can answer that question for me." She blinked her eyelashes as she looked up at me.

Oh, yes, this I could do! I knew what she was doing and why she was doing it, and she was right. I needed the release that playing with her would bring. I knew I needed her submission, but her collar was still in the playroom. I went into my closet and got something to substitute for it, and grabbed a few extras for fun. When I returned, I told her, "I want you to kneel. But first, I want you to strip. And the topping from the bottom stops now. We don't have your collar, so we will use this instead." I took the gray necktie in my hands and tied it around her neck. I laid the other two neckties on the bed. I wouldn't need them until she was naked.

"Yes, Master," she answered, understanding the substitute collar around her neck. Immediately, she started stripping out of her clothes. When she was naked, wearing nothing but the grey tie around her neck, she knelt in a submissive pose and waited for me. Holy shit, she was hot. My Princess! My Goddess! My Fiancee!

I stood in front of her and commanded, "Unzip me and take out my cock."

She obeyed, and when I sprang free, she immediately fisted me and licked my head. I stepped back out of her reach. "You didn't ask permission, princess. You just earned a punishment."

"I'm sorry, Master," she said. "I'm just so hungry for you."

She just made me harder. But I went to the bed and got the other two neckties. "Hands behind your back," I commanded her. I took the blue paisley tie and used it to tie her hands behind her. "No more touching for you, since you seem to forget that you need to ask me first."

"Sorry, Master," she mumbled. She didn't sound sorry at all, which only made me smirk.

I took the red with black pinstriped one and tied it around her head, covering her eyes. "This is your punishment," I told her. "You know you aren't allowed to come when you're blindfolded. So, there will be no orgasm for you. You are going to finish the interview feeling... needy. You're not going to get your panties back either. If I had any ben wa balls here, you'd wear them during the rest of the interview, but we're not going to the playroom to get them while there are strangers in our home. That's why you aren't wearing your collar either. But I like the way my favorite gray silk tie looks on you."

"Thank you, Master," she responded submissively. "May I ask a question?"

I shouldn't allow her to, but I was curious about what she wanted to know. "I will allow it. What is it?" I asked.

"What are ben wa balls?" she asked.

"Oh, princess," I answered, delighted that she was curious, but determined to make her find out the hard way. "That's something for me to know and you to find out. When the time is right. Not today."

"As you wish, Master," she responded.

No, that was too easy. I knew how my girl was thinking. I might be illiterate when it came to reading the human heart, but the brain was something I understood better. "I want you to wait, Princess," I told her. "You are not allowed to ask Kate, or to do an Internet search. Ben wa balls are off limits until I say otherwise. Are we understood?"

She sighed but answered submissively, "Yes, Master."

"Good, now open your mouth." When she obeyed, I fed her my cock, which she received eagerly. Holy shit, she was good! But I didn't want to finish like this, and I was going to in no time if I let her continue. I knew we had to be fast, but I also wanted to tease her some more, to make her more needy. I stepped back, so she had to release me. "Stand up," I commanded. I untied her hands and led her to the bed. "Lie down on your back with your head hanging over the side of the bed. Stretch your arms out on each side of you, and imagine that they are restrained. Don't move your arms until I tell you to." I knew I wanted her to use her hands, but not yet.

When she'd gotten into the position I wanted her in, I said, "Good. Now, bend your knees and then drop your legs apart so I have a better view of your pussy. Yes, just like that." My girl was amazingly beautiful, spread out in front of me like this, her head hanging over the side, her mouth open and panting, eager to receive my cock again. Who was I to disappoint her? I stood in front of her and resumed fucking her mouth. She latched onto me and sucked me hard as soon as I was in her mouth again. Yes! Just like that!

She was going to finish me in no time, so I picked up the vibrating wand and turned it on low speed. When she heard the sound of the vibrations, she gasped a little around my cock in anticipation. Again, I didn't disappoint her, going directly for her nipples. She moaned around my cock, which felt amazing.

After I'd played with her nipples for a couple of minutes, I took her hand and placed the wand in it. "I want you to play with yourself with this," I instructed her. "Use it on your clit, and use your other hand too. I want to watch you fuck yourself with your fingers. But remember, you are not allowed to come."

As she obeyed, I resumed fucking her mouth without restraint. I tweaked and pinched her nipples while she teased her own clit with the vibrator. When she slipped two fingers into her wet cunt, that was it for me. I lost my load down her throat, and she slurped and swallowed while she continued fucking herself with those two fingers. Once I was soft and she had licked me clean the way she always does, I pulled out of her mouth, took the vibrating wand from her, and turned it up to the highest speed. Her fingers were still in her cunt, but she had slowed down.

"Did I tell you to stop?" I asked her.

"No, Master," she answered, and she pumped herself harder and faster. "But I need to... I'm going to..."

"No, you're not," I said, as I held the wand to her clit. "If you come right now, then you won't get to come again for 24 hours. And I have plans for the playroom tonight."

"Oh, shit!" Ana cried. "Please, Master!"

I knew she was going to come if I continued to stimulate her clit, and I didn't want her to, so decided to have mercy on her and stop. "Give me your hand, princess," I ordered her. When she did, I licked her juices from her fingers. That only made me want her more. I wanted to eat her, but I knew she'd come in no time flat if I even licked her once, and I wanted her needy. So instead, I helped her sit up on the bed. When she was seated on the side of the bed, I tugged on the tie around her neck, forcing her to stand and fall into me. I kissed her lips passionately, making her gasp. Only then did I remove the red tie from her eyes. The desperation in her eyes made me smirk.

"Just like I want you, Princess," I told her. "You are absolutely perfect, do you know that?"

When I saw the fire in her eyes, I knew she wanted to snap an answer back at me, but she remained silent. The gray tie was still around her neck, which was the same as her collar. She was still being submissive. My amazing princess.

I untied the gray tie and removed it from her neck. Then, I felt inspired to change the tie that I was wearing. I took it off and put on the gray one instead. While I was at it, I tucked my cock back into my pants and zipped up. Now, I was completely dressed while Ana stood totally naked in front of me, staring at me lustfully and angrily.

"Well, you look much more relaxed and together than you did when we came in here," she said with a snide undertone. "I'm glad I could help you with that." She blew out a puff of air, and squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. She may as well have had "frustrated" written across her forehead.

"Me too," I responded with a smirk. "How are you feeling, princess?"

"I think you already know how I'm feeling, Christian," she answered, and the bite in her tone was unmistakable. "Exactly how you want me to be feeling. You're not very nice sometimes."

I laughed. "You love it, and you know it," I said.

"What I love is your cock," she snapped. "And I want it. Inside me. Right now."

"Now, now, princess," I teased her. "That's not very lady-like, now is it? Besides, Kate is waiting for us to finish the interview."

"Oh, God," she moaned. "Kate. The interview. Shit. Why, Christian? After I helped you relax and get over yourself, is this any way to return the favor?"

That got to me. "Princess... No, you're right, it's not. And if it's too much for you, I'll fuck you right now. But... I admit, it's really selfish. I'm enjoying the control. I get off on it, you know that."

Ana sighed, and then she moved away from me and started getting dressed. "Shit," she muttered, and kept talking as she put on her clothes. She tossed her panties to me, remembering that I'd told her not to wear them. "It's OK. I get it. I get off on giving up control too, it's just that I'd like to be getting off on it right now instead of waiting until you're ready to let me have it. But if you're really the Dom, then I have to wait. And I want you to really be the Dom. I prefer it that way. I'll only top when we both decide we want it that way. It was fun, but I prefer submission. Even when it drives me crazy. I'm just so horny right now I can hardly see straight."

"I promise I'll make it worth your while," I assured her. "As soon as the interview is finished and Kate and her crew have left, I'm going to ravish that sopping wet pussy of yours. I'm going to make you come so hard."

"Oh, God!" Ana cried. "Stop! I think I can come just from your words alone."

"Well, we can't have that," I teased. "Come on, let's go finish this thing."

"Do I look OK?" Ana asked. She didn't know how radiant her skin looked when she was turned on. She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

"You're stunning," I told her. I took her hand, and we returned to the Living Room.

Kate was still mad as hell at me. I wasn't sure if it was because of what I'd said to Leila, because she wasn't able to confront me herself about it, or because we'd made her wait so long to continue the interview. As soon as we appeared, she called out to her camera crew, who were playing pool in the library.

"Let's get this show on the road," she announced. "We don't have all day."

"I'm sorry for the delay, Kate. Thanks for your patience," Ana said. She was apologizing? For what?

I squeezed Ana's hand and pulled her towards me. I nuzzled her as I said to Kate, "I'm the one who should apologize for the delay, and for my meltdown earlier. Ana has been helping me get in touch with my... umm... emotions and shit. Anyway, just to make it clear, Ana is the only one for me, ever. She's my soulmate. I love Leila as a friend, and that is what that was about. Hell, if you're lucky, Kate, I might even grow to love you too."

Kate laughed, but I could see the shock in her eyes. Before she had a chance to say anything, I added, "But I'll never want to fuck you."

When Kate smirked back at me, I knew things were good between us again. "Well, now that we've got all that cleared up... and you just let me know if you change your mind about fucking, anytime you want to sub again... let's get the crew back in here and get back to work."

"Kate..." Ana began.

"She's joking, princess," I assured her. "Kate knows damn well I'll never sub for her."

Kate laughed again and told Ana, "Relax, Steele. I don't want your man."

After that, we got back into the interview fairly quickly. I was glad that Kate only asked a few questions about Leila. She explained why Leila had left during the break, and we talked generally about her disease. But I was not thrilled when Kate shifted directions and focused her attention on Christina.

"Christian, now that you have a daughter, how is that affecting your work?" Kate asked.

"Well, I haven't had any business meetings after 5 p.m. this past week. I've been able to be home in time to read to her and put her to bed for the past few days. I want to keep that up, so I will keep my schedule clear as much as possible. I know it won't always be possible to be there every night, but I make an effort to be there as much as I can. It's important for her to know that she has a father who loves her." Damn! I used that word again, and this time on camera. What the hell was wrong with me?

"What about you, Ana?" Kate asked. "How will being Christina's new mother affect your work?"

"Based on the past week, I think I can safely say that my work will not be affected by motherhood," Ana assured Kate and everyone who would watch this interview later. "I don't believe I'm being naive when I say that either. Last week, I had to fire my COO, so work is taking more out of me than ever before. Thankfully, I have an amazing executive staff who have stepped up and taken on extra duties until I am able to hire a new COO. Also, as soon as Leila and Christina moved in, I hired a nursing staff for Leila and a nanny service for Christina. So, they are both well cared for while Christian and I are at work."

Kate asked, "I'm sorry, did I understand correctly that Leila and Christina are living here with you?"

"They live next door," Ana explained, "In my penthouse. I live here, with Christian in his penthouse. We were neighbors for months and didn't even realize it. Anyway, it has been convenient to have them right next door, and there is plenty of room for their nurses and nannies."

"I see," Kate said. "Why did you hire the nurses and nannies for Christian's former... umm.. submissive... and the child that she had with him?"

Ana responded without hesitation, "Because they needed my help, and Christian was out of the country. When I saw the conditions they were living in, I had to act. I coordinated with a hospice provider to secure qualified nurses to care for Leila, and then I contacted a nanny service, which I hired to provide nannies for Christina temporarily, until Christian could return and figure out what to do."

Kate turned to me and asked, "And what have you figured out, Christian? Are you going to keep the nanny service that Ana arranged?"

"For now," I answered. "Ultimately, we want to hire one or two full-time nannies, once things have settled down and we have time to conduct the interviews."

Kate said, rather indignantly, "So what you're saying is... Christina is going to be raised by nannies. I guess that makes sense, seeing as how her parents are both billionaires who are too busy running their companies and can afford to hire help..."

"You're jumping to a few conclusions there, aren't you, Kate?" Ana interrupted defensively. "Weren't you yourself, as you put it, 'raised by nannies'?"

Kate couldn't hide her smirk. She was clearly proud of Ana for jumping in like she had. "I wouldn't call it that, no. I was raised by my parents. Both of them were very present in my life, all through my childhood and teenage years. But, yes, we did have nannies throughout that time."

Ana nodded, and said, "Christian and I are both committed to being an active part of Christina's life as she grows up. We aren't going to hire someone else to raise her. We will hire help to make sure she is safe at all times and to make sure all of her needs are provided."

"Well, thank you for clearing all of that up, Ana," Kate said. "So, should Christina expect any little brothers or sisters in the near future?"

"Yes," I answered confidently.

"No," Ana answered at the same time. We both looked at each other in surprise.

"But you want kids eventually, right?" I asked her.

"Of course... eventually," she answered.

I turned back to Kate and asked, "What do you mean exactly by 'near future'?"

"A year or two?" Kate clarified.

"That might be a bit soon," I answered, realizing from Ana's response that she wanted to wait, even though at this point, I wouldn't mind having a child with her right away. Holy shit, did I just think that? Yes, I wanted another child, with Ana. I wanted to see her pregnant with my child. "But we do want to have more children, in a few years."

"Yes," Ana recovered. "I was an only child and always wanted a sibling. I want that for Christina."

"OK, we all want the best for Christina," Kate said, and then she changed the subject. "Ana, I want to go back to something you said earlier. You mentioned that you recently had to fire your COO, which is your second in command, right? That's Jack Hyde, isn't it?"

"Yes, that is correct on both counts," Ana answered. "It turned out that Jack was embezzling from me."

"I'm sure that came as a shock," Kate said.

"Yes, to say the least," Ana responded. "I pride myself on being an excellent judge of character, but I was dead wrong when it came to Jack Hyde. He was a wolf in sheep's clothing."

For a moment, I was afraid that Kate was going to make the connection between Hyde and the video, which our lawyers had instructed us not to talk about. Kate, of course, knew that Hyde had bought and released the video, and she knew he had other videos, but I wasn't sure if she knew we shouldn't talk about Hyde. There was likely to be a police investigation in the near future, and we needed to keep quiet about Hyde's connection to the video and his secret vendetta against me until that investigation was completed.

"So how has the firing of the Chief Operating Officer affected Ismintis International?" Kate asked.

"From the outside looking in, not at all," Ana responded easily. "It is only my executive staff and I who are profoundly affected by the loss of our COO. But I think they all agree with me that we'd rather have more work on our shoulders than to work with anyone like Jack Hyde. And besides, it's temporary. As soon as I hire a new COO, we will be back to normall."

Kate turned to me and asked, "What about GEH, Christian? How's business?"

"Strong as always," I answered. "Thankfully, I have an excellent COO whom I'd trust with my life. Hell, she's saved my ass plenty of times in business, I'm sure she'd do the same if my life were in danger. Ros Bailey is more than my COO. She's also a good friend. I hope that Ana is able to find someone like Ros to replace Ismintis International's COO."

Kate continued, "You both made it clear earlier that you have no plans to merge your companies. Do you do business with each other, and if so, how does that work?"

I answered, "We've done a little business together recently, but for the most part, we're both interested in smaller companies than in each other's. The overlap only comes when we're interested in taking over the same businesses."

"What do you do when that happens?" Kate asked, and jokingly added, "Fight it out?"

I couldn't help but rib Ana, knowing how needy she was feeling. Yes, I am evil. "Well, I did tell you earlier that she's stronger than she looks, right?"

"Yes," Kate answered, "And that your ass was still sore from last night."

I laughed. I had been purposeful in telling the world that Ana topped me because I didn't want her to look weak, as my submissive. I knew what a risk she was taking with her own reputation, and people who had looked up to her for her feminist views were likely to lose faith in her if they saw her as another one of my victims. She was no victim.

"Yes, well, we do like to play," I said playfully, winking at Ana. She smiled sweetly. I knew by the way she crossed her legs that the smile was only for the camera.

Instead of allowing the conversation to go the way it was headed, Ana steered us back to Kate's question. "When we are interested in the same company, we talk it out. We're committed to keeping communication open between us, about all topics, including business. We've also both vowed to never do anything that might hurt the other person's business."

I laughed and added, "Yes, that was the day we were first pictured together in the media. When we had lunch together."

"Right," Ana agreed. "In fact, when we made that agreement, that was when our pinkies were linked. I'm sure you've seen those pictures. I think I can safely say, looking back, that was the moment I fell in love with Christian Grey."

"Really?" I asked, feeling a mixture of surprise and delight. Ana nodded at me and smiled seductively. I could hardly wait to get her alone again. When was this interview going to be over?

Kate asked, "What about you, Christian? Was that the moment for you too?"

"No," I answered. "I was already in love with her. I just didn't realize it yet. I fell in love with her the night I met her, even before I knew who she was. Finding out who she was only sealed it for me."

"At the masked BDSM event, right?" Kate confirmed.

"Exactly right," I answered. "We talked for hours that night. I knew she was special."

Ana smiled adorably at me and added, "I almost didn't go. I'm really glad I did."

Kate asked, "So Ana, now that the truth is out about that video of Christian and Leila, what do you want to happen now?"

"Honestly?" Ana asked. "I wish people would just leave him alone about it. Leave us alone. It's our private lives. We're business people, not celebrities. There's no reason our lives should be so interesting for the gossip magazines. We're private people, and we've revealed a lot more of our lives today than we really wanted to, but the things that were being said about Christian in the media were ludicrous and had to be corrected. Now that we've done that, I hope we can get on with our lives."

"Christian, what do you want to happen now?" Kate asked.

"I want to marry this beautiful woman right here, go on running my company while she runs hers, and raise our daughter together, including her mother in that for as long as she's with us. I hope people can forget what they saw in the video... it was something very personal and very private, in my past, and it was consensual. I hope we can focus on what matters today."

"Christian, I have to ask..." Kate started, and I knew what she was going to ask. It was the only question we hadn't gotten to yet. "Are there any other videos out there?"

I sighed before I responded with a nod. "Unfortunately, yes. The woman that Leila referred to earlier, the one who she sold her video to... It wasn't only Leila that she introduced me to. There were other women before Leila, and she also paid them to make videos. I learned all of this from Leila, long after it had already been done. They all did it without me ever finding out. If not for Leila, I wouldn't have known."

"Are you saying that you did the same thing to them that we saw you doing to Leila?" Kate asked.

Shit, I hated this. "Yes," I answered. "With all of them, we had contracted agreements. All of them were consensual. All of them had safe words, which I always honored. All of them were in the lifestyle because they wanted to be. And all of them also signed Non-Disclosure Agreements, which is a legally binding contract. Leila broke hers, with my permission, today. She actually insisted on telling her story. I didn't want her to, because her health is so frail, but I couldn't deny her."

"Are you saying that if any of those other women talk to the media without your permission, you plan to take legal action?" Kate asked.

"Maybe," I answered. "If any of them want to talk, they should come to me first. Now that the cat is out of the bag about my private life, I'm not sure how much it matters. But I won't condone any of them telling lies about their time with me; I will press charges for that. But if they're anything like me, they'd rather keep their private lives private, and I certainly won't reveal any of their identities."

Kate ended the interview by giving Ana the last word. "What's one thing you want the world to know about Christian Grey that they don't already know?"

Ana thought about that for a moment. She looked at me with so much love, I felt my heart nearly exploding inside my chest. "That he is one of the most passionate people I have ever known. He loves deeply. He's obsessed with protecting the people he loves. In spite of how things look to people who don't know him, he would never hurt another person intentionally. In business, sometimes people get hurt when they lose what they've worked hard for, but this is the nature of the businesses that we run, so I can fully identify with that. But in his personal life, he would never hurt a woman, or even lift a hand to one outside of a controlled, consensual, BDSM agreement. If people only hear one thing we have said here today, I hope that is it."

Kate closed the interview and signed off. Then she smiled at both us of and said that we'd knocked it out of the water. I only hoped she was right.

At the moment though, I only wanted her and all the cameras out of my house. I wanted to throw Ana over my shoulder, carry her into the playroom, and strip her naked.

Thankfully, Kate was gone in only a few minutes. She reminded me that we would see her again soon.. at my parent's house for Sunday brunch.

As soon as everyone was gone, and it was just Ana and me, I started towards her to make good on my wish for the playroom. She looked at me innocently, as if she didn't know what I was thinking, and said, "Well, I need to get to work. I have a lot I still need to get done today."

I smirked at her, knowing she was bluffing. "Oh, really? Yeah, me too. I'm sure Ros has a million questions for me. Do you want to ride in together?" When I saw the expression on her face, I added, "Or would you rather ride me? Because I know which one of those I want right now. And if that's what you want, then you have two minutes to get into the playroom, strip off all your clothes for me, and get into position."

She didn't have to say a word. Instead, she took off running. Instead of two minutes, it was more like thirty seconds later that she was completely naked and kneeling in the playroom.

When I walked in, just behind her, I went immediately to my toy chest and got her collar. Once it was around her neck, I asked her teasingly, "Princess, why are your clothes scattered everywhere? That's so unlike you. You're usually so tidy."

"I'm sorry, Master," she answered breathlessly. "I'm just so horny. I couldn't wait. Do you want me to pick them up?"

"Yes, I do," I answered. "Pick them up and fold them neatly. Then take them into the bathroom and place them on the vanity there." I honestly didn't care about her clothes being scattered everywhere, but I loved watching her bend over and pick them up.

When she'd returned from the bathroom, she knelt in front of me again. "May I suck you again, Maser?" she asked.

"No," I answered. I wanted to drag this out with her a little longer. She was so much fun. "Stand up, princess," I ordered her. When she obeyed, I said, "Now, undress me."

With a look of delight on her face, she slipped my jacket off my shoulders. "Where should I put your clothes, Master?" she asked.

"Throw them all over the floor, like yours were," I instructed her with a serious look on my face.

She looked confused. "You want me to make another mess?" she asked.

"Are you questioning my command, Princess?" I asked, cocking one eyebrow in admonishment.

"Umm.. no, Master." She threw my jacket on the floor, and then she untied my tie, the same one that had substituted as her collar earlier that day.

"Hold on to this," I ordered her. I took it from her and tied it loosely around her neck again. She started working on my shirt buttons, and once they were done, she removed my cuff links.

"Where should I put these, Master?" she asked, holding my cuff links in her hand.

"Put them in your mouth," I ordered her, mainly to see how she would respond.

She looked confused, but she obeyed. I now had a favorite pair of cuff links. Ana continued by slipping my shirt off my shoulders, letting it pool to the floor. "Half way there," I told her. "Shoes and socks next."

She knelt in front of me and removed my shoes, one at a time, and then my socks. She then looked up at me, waiting for instructions. "Continue," I ordered, pointing at my belt. She remained on her knees as she removed my belt and then my pants. Lastly, she slipped my boxer briefs down my legs, making sure to trail her hands seductively over my legs as she went.

I ticked my tongue at her and said, "Trying to speed things up, Princess? It won't work."

She couldn't speak because my cuff links were still in her mouth. She also couldn't take my cock in her mouth the way I knew she wanted to. She simply knelt there, looking at me, waiting for me. I watched her for a minute or two, making her wait.

"Stand up," I finally ordered her. When she was standing, I said, "Look at this mess, Princess. I think you need to clean it up."

She looked at me in anger for a moment, but then she obeyed. Each time she picked up a piece of my clothing, she made sure to bend all the way over with her ass towards me, giving me a great view. She knew what I was up to. Smart girl.

When my clothes were all neatly folded in her hands, I ordered her to put them in the bathroom next to hers. When she returned, I was already standing next to the bed. "Come here, princess," I commanded.

She walked over to the bed and stood in front of me. Then she surprised me by spitting my cuff links into her hand and saying, "I'm sorry, Master, but I wasn't sure if you wanted me to keep these in my mouth or leave them in the bathroom."

I smirked at her and answered, "Put them back in your mouth, Princess. I'll take them from you when I'm ready to free your mouth for other things. Just be careful not to swallow them if you get... excited."

She gasped a little before returning the cuff links to her mouth. My girl was already excited.

I got on the bed, on my knees and ordered her to do the same. When she was kneeling in front of me, I took the tie from around her neck and instructed her to hold her hands in front of her. I tied them together, and then I reached up and grabbed hold of the chain that was hanging from the ceiling directly over the center of the bed. I secured her bound hands to the chain so that she was kneeling on the bed with her arms bound over her head.

"Are you in pain?" I asked her. "Is this position comfortable for you?"

She nodded her head, and I realized that I'd asked two questions that needed different answers, and she couldn't speak. I held my hand in front of her mouth and commanded her to spit the cuff links out.

"Green, Master," she said. "Please don't stop."

I needed her to be able to tell me if she started feeling any pain, so I reached over and put the cuff links on the side table. Then I lay on the bed with my face directly under her. Her pussy was dripping wet, and I could hardly wait to taste it. When I spoke, I'm sure she could feel my breath on her pussy. "Princess, you've waited long enough. You have permission to come as many times as you need to. If you can see my face, the usual eye contact is required. If my face is buried in your cunt, then come anyway." And with that, I attached my lips to her cunt and sucked her the way that she sucks me. It set her off like a rocket. I held on firmly to her thighs so she couldn't move, and I made her come twice again with my tongue and teeth before I got out from under her and knelt in front of her again.

I watched her as she got her breathing under control. My God, she was so fucking beautiful. I couldn't take my eyes off her. When she could breathe again, I kissed her, fondling her breasts as I made love to her mouth. She kissed me just as passionately as I kissed her. My chest felt like it was on fire.

At last, I released her lips, but only because I wanted to fuck her. I shifted so that I was under her again, and lifted her so that she was sitting on my thighs. She looked in my eyes, hungrily, waiting for me to command her.

Finally I spoke. "I was serious earlier when I said I wanted you to ride me. You've ridden my face, but I held on to you too tightly. This time, I want you to ride me hard. I want to see your tits bouncing. And I want you to make yourself come on my dick at least twice more before I lose my load in you.

Ana responded by shifting over me and lowering herself onto me. I guided myself into her dripping cunt, and once I was fully sheathed inside her, she started bouncing. There was no better sight in the world that Ana's perfect bouncing tits. I reached up and tweaked them as she bounced even harder. Then she looked in my eyes with adoration, cried out, "I love you, Master!" and came really hard. Holy shit! That was incredible!

"I love you, too, Princess." I responded to her, as I continued playing with her bouncing tits. I leaned up so I could reach them with my mouth, giving both of them a good licking. When I sucked one of them into my mouth and bit down on her nipple, it set her off again. I decided I had it in me to give her one more before I finished. I pumped upwards, meeting her bounces thrust for thrust, and I took her other breast into my mouth. When I didn't think I could last any longer, I reached between her legs and started rubbing her clit. That was all it took to make her come with me.

When I had regained my senses enough to see clearly, I reached up and released Ana's hands. I rolled her over and massaged her shoulders and arms, rubbing life back into them. Once I felt that they had blood running normally in them again, I continued down her back, massaging deeply. She sighed a few times. My girl was enjoying this, so I kept going, over her ass and all the way down both legs and back up again.

When I felt she'd had enough, I snuggled next to her, kissed her hair, and repeated my words, whispering them into her hair this time, "I love you, Princess. I love you so fucking much."

"Me too, Master," she said sleepily.


	35. Chapter 35: Talking to Parents (APOV)

**Chapter 35: Talking to the Parents (Anastasia's POV)**

"Dad, you're not hearing me," I interrupted the fit that Ray was throwing. I was glad I couldn't see him through the phone because I knew from the tone of his voice how red his face was, and I was already worried enough about his high blood pressure. If he didn't calm down, he was liable to have a heart attack. So I spoke as calmly as I could, the same way he used to talk to me when I was five years old and throwing a tantrum. "Would you please calm down, Dad? This isn't good for your blood pressure. Just listen to me, OK?"

I heard the deep breath that Ray took before he responded, "No, Annie, you listen to me. What the hell are you doing? I heard you. Every word. You're _engaged_ to _Christian Grey_ , the same Christian Grey that runs GEH... your competition! I didn't even know you were seeing each other, and you're already _engaged_! After what, a week?! Not only that, but you're planning to raise his love child as your own! A baby he didn't even fucking know about until YOU took her into your own home?! And as if that isn't enough, you let that son of a bitch _beat_ you?! I know all about BDSM, Annie. I was a marine, remember? I've lived in the world. What the hell have you gotten yourself into? And do you know what this is going to do to your career, when this... interview... that you did this morning airs? You're committing professional suicide, sweetheart! Look at all you've achieved! How the hell can you just throw it all down the drain? For what?"

Well, shit. I knew this was coming, and I understood where he was coming from. Things had happened incredibly quickly between Christian and me, and our whirlwind romance was out of character for both of us in some ways, but totally in character in others. Neither of us had experienced anything like the kind of relationship that was blossoming between us, or the passion or chemistry, but we both were accustomed to acting swiftly when we encountered something we wanted. But I knew I couldn't explain what was happening to my dad. He'd never understand. "Because I love him, Dad," I answered simply and calmly.

"You love him!" Ray spat at me. "Annie, wake the hell up! A man like Grey... honey... he can't..." Ray trailed off, struggling to find the right words."

At those words, I felt my hackles rising. How dare he insinuate that Christian couldn't love me? "What do you mean, 'A man like Grey.' Do you know him? How do you know what kind of man he is?" I challenged.

"Everybody knows him, Annie. He's in the news enough. He's a billionaire CEO of one of the biggest companies in the world."

"So am I, Dad!" And random people who read the tabloids certainly don't know me. What the hell was Ray thinking? But I knew... he wasn't thinking. He was reacting. I had to just get through this conversation and give him time to deal with it.

"My point exactly!" Ray insisted. "You may be seeing this as love, but I guarantee that Grey sees it as a strategic business move. He's using you, sweetheart! And you let him _beat_ you! With canes and whips and... oh, shit!"

"Ray, just stop it!" I spoke louder than I'd intended. Calm, Anastasia. Never lose your cool. I knew that it was time to wrap this up, because I wasn't going to get any further with Ray until he had time to process the news I'd just steamrolled him with, and then he needed to meet Christian and get to know him. Only then would he change his opinion.

More calmly, but firmly, I continued, "You know absolutely nothing about Christian or about what we do privately, and you don't know what you're talking about. You're making some pretty wild assumptions based on something you have no idea about. I'm not an idiot, and I didn't get where I am with my company by being naive or gullible. If that's what you think of me, then you don't know me as well as I thought you did. I called you because I wanted you to be forewarned before you found out about my private life from the news, and now I've done that. I think this conversation is finished."

"Annie...wait," Ray said pleadingly, so I did. "This just isn't like you, sweetheart."

"You're wrong, Dad," I answered. "This is just like me. I've always gone after what I wanted. It's how I became a billionaire. That, and by following my instincts. That's what I'm doing now."

"Annie..." Ray hesitated before he said, "Acquiring a husband is different than acquiring a business."

I blew out a breath of frustration. "Dad, I'm not 'acquiring a husband.' I'm marrying Christian. Can we just... Look, I know you're worried. I get it. Just take my word that Christian isn't hurting me. He would never, because he loves me. I know this is all a shock to you, and you need time to process it. And I need to get back to work, so can we continue this another time, after you've had some time to think about it?"

"I don't need time to think about it," Ray insisted. "I will never accept a man who beats you."

"Dad, Christian doesn't abuse me, I promise," I insisted. "If he did, he would have been out the door a long time ago. I won't allow a man to hurt me like that. I'm not sure what you've seen of BDSM. I think there are a lot of different ways people practice it. What we do doesn't hurt me. I like it. And I don't want to go into any detail with you, but..."

"Does he hit you, Annie?" Dad pressed.

"I told you... I'm not going to discuss my sex life with you. He doesn't do anything that I don't want him to. I like it, Dad. Now... I really need to work, and I'm really done with this conversation." I knew there was no use in trying to talk to him any longer. He was convinced about something he knew nothing about.

"Annie..." Ray tried to continue.

"No," I insisted, but I wanted him to know I wasn't angry with him, and that I still wanted him in my life, even if he didn't accept all the new things... and people... in it. "Ray, you're the only parent I have left, and I love you, but I'm not going to talk with you about this any more until you're willing to be more open minded about it. When you're ready to meet Christian and give him a chance, then you can let me know. I'll be waiting for your call." With that, I ended the call.

After that conversation, I wanted to have a good cry, but I didn't have time. I had to get to my office. It was already after noon, and I hadn't even made it there yet. After our sex marathon in Christian's playroom, followed by my power nap, Christian had needed to get going. His therapist had a small window of time that he could fit Christian in, and then Christian had a meeting at GEH. As soon as he left, I had called Ray. I hadn't even had time for lunch yet.

I ended up grabbing a sandwich and eating it in the car as Luke drove us to Ismintis. Christian texted me that he was on his way to his office and that he wanted to talk about his therapy session when I had time. As soon as I got to my office, I gave him a call.

"Flynn thinks I've made 'a remarkable breakthrough!' Christian told me, faking a British accent, which I assumed was an impersonation of his therapist. "Not only am I not losing it, but apparently, all this love shit is a good thing."

I struggled not to laugh at his words. "What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well, apparently, Flynn thinks I was doing some kind of projection thing with Leila and my birth mother. He got me to admit that I loved my birth mother. That I still do. Love her. I cried like a baby when I realized it."

"Wow, Christian," I responded. "That does sound like a breakthrough," I agreed.

"Yeah, I know," he replied. "It feels like it too. I knew I didn't have the same compulsions I had before... to punish her. I didn't want to do that to you. Anyway, I told Flynn about

how dejected I felt when I discovered that the fucking video had been leaked, how guilty I felt for what I'd done to Leila, and how I felt lower than the son of a bitch who was the sperm donor to my birth mother. He grabbed on to my comparison right away. I didn't realize what I was doing. When I told him about what happened this morning, and what I said to Leila, that's when he said it was a breakthrough. It confused the hell out of me at first. I really thought I was losing it. I told a former submissive that I LOVE her. I explained to Flynn that I've only ever said those words to you, and that was only a few days ago. I've never even said those words to my mom."

"And you feel guilty about that," I pointed out.

"Damn it, Ana, I should fire Flynn now that I have you," Christian joked. "His exact words, I feel guilty about never telling Grace that I love her. You're right. He also pointed out, as you so aptly did this morning, that I'm not in love with Leila. He was shocked when I told him that you'd agreed to marry me though."

"Why should that shock him?" I asked.

"Correction," Christian said, "He wasn't shocked that you'd agreed. He was shocked that I'd proposed." Christian used the fake British accent again when he quoted his therapist, "You'll forgive me if I'm just a bit gobsmacked. Christian Grey... engaged?"

I giggled, which made Christian sigh and say, "My favorite sound. Music to my ears. I told Flynn that I am engaged to the most amazing woman in the universe, and he congratulated me. I expected him to tell me we were moving too fast, but he didn't say anything like that."

"No, that's my dad's job," I muttered.

"Oh," Christian responded. "It didn't go well, huh?"

"No, but I knew it wouldn't," I answered. "But we're not talking about that. What else did Flynn say?" I steered the conversation back to him.

"Well," Christian thought for a moment. "About the video... he asked me what my reaction was when I first saw it. I told him how disgusted and guilty I felt. He pointed out that I didn't feel aroused. Not at all. Even the idea of getting off on that is disgusting. But Flynn reminded me that at the time, I did get off on it. And I purposefully chose women like Leila who looked like... her."

"Your birth mother?" I clarified.

"Yes," he replied. "And Flynn pointed out... This was the first time I've talked with him about her that I called her that. My birth mom. I didn't call her... a crack whore. I couldn't... I can't... call her that anymore. I see her like Leila now. She couldn't help it. I think... I think she did her best."

"Wow, Christian," I said. Flynn was right. This was an amazing breakthrough. It sounded like Christian was healing from something that had haunted him his entire life.

"That's when I really lost it, Ana," Christian admitted. "I broke down. Cried like a fucking baby. I was a slobbering mess, which shocked the fuck out of Flynn because he'd never seen me cry, much less turn into a blubbering idiot. Do you realize... every submissive I've had, until you, I used to punish my birth mom? I punished her for something she most likely had no control over. And there I was, missing out on the first year and a half of my daughter's life, just like that fucking sperm donor who fucked up my mom's life. I've never hated myself as much as I did when I realized what I'd done."

I swallowed, and brushed away a tear that I was glad he couldn't see before I asked, "And how did Flynn respond to that?"

"He told me that it wasn't fair to compare myself to somebody I'd never met. And that now that I knew about Christina, I was doing the right thing for her, so I needed to let go of the guilt. Deal with it, or some shit like that."

"It's not shit, Christian," I insisted. "You didn't know about her."

"No, but I should have," he responded. "I'm a powerful man, Ana, with more resources at my disposal than most people in the world. There's no excuse for me not knowing about her. And besides, I have no way of knowing if my sperm donor knew about me. Chances are, he was just a john who never even saw my mother again after he fucked her, but that doesn't change how I feel."

"Which is...?" I pressed.

"Pissed off, Dr. Flynn!" Christian snapped at me, but I ignored his outburst, realizing that it wasn't me he was angry at, even if I did sound too much like his therapist. "I'm fucking pissed. At him, at myself, at that son of a bitch pimp... but not at her. Not any more."

"What did Dr. Flynn say when you told him about your anger towards your birth father and yourself?" I asked.

"My birth father," Christian repeated distastefully. "Right. I told Flynn that I hoped he rotted in hell, and then I told him that I didn't think my hatred of him was rational because, like I said, he probably didn't even know about me. He probably didn't even know my mom. She was probably just a quick fuck that he paid a few dollars for. Flynn said it didn't matter if my feelings were rational. He said I needed to forgive him. And I need to forgive myself."

"And... do you agree with him?" I asked.

Christian was quiet for a moment. "Yeah, I agree. But I'm not there yet. I missed a year and a half of my child's life. I missed her first steps and her first words. Leila could have died, and Christina could have been left alone with her body, just like I was. I can't forgive myself for that, Ana."

Holy shit! How did I respond to that? I was even more relieved that I'd acted when I had, and Christian had not seen the hellhole that Leila and Christina had been living in with her stoned out of her mind sister. "Thank God that didn't happen," was all I could come up with.

"Yeah, thank God," Christian agreed. "I'm beginning to think that he does exist after all. Which reminds me... I want to go see my mom tonight. Grace, I mean."

"God reminds you of Grace?" I asked.

"Yeah, of course. She's my angel. Haven't I told you that story? About how she rescued me? She was the attending in the ER when they brought me in, after I was found... She was wearing all white. I thought she really was an angel."

"No, I didn't know," I responded. "But it makes sense. She is pretty angelic."

"She is," he agreed. "Will you go with me?" he asked. "To my parents' tonight? I need to talk to her, and I want it to be in person, and I don't want to put it off."

"Of course I will," I answered. "When do you want to go? I have some things I need to finish before I can leave work."

"Yeah, me too," he replied. "How much time do you need? If I pick you up at Ismintis at 6 p.m., will that give you enough time?"

"It's only a little after 2:00 now, so yes, that should be enough time. I have a few dozen emails I need to respond to, and then I want to clear up a few things in Addis Ababa. Hyde really made a mess of things there, and it's going to delay my plan for the schools if I don't get on it right away."

Christian asked, "How's the hunt for your new COO coming?"

"I know who I want," I replied. "I'm just waiting for her latest background check. I'm digging deeper than I ever have, trying to prevent anything like what happened with Hyde. If it all checks out, then I'll contact her and offer her the job."

"Her, huh?" Christian pried.

"Yep, and that's all you're getting," I answered. I wasn't ready to share this news with him, and I wouldn't until it was a sure thing. I didn't expect him to be surprised by my choice, but I knew if I told him prematurely, it might jinx things. Besides, he'd probably insist on doing his own background check. In fact, he'd probably do that anyway, once I hired her.

The rest of the afternoon passed quickly, and before I knew it, Christian was standing at the door of my office, looking like a GQ model as he leaned against the doorframe with his legs crossed, watching me finish an email. I nearly jumped out of my skin when I glanced up and saw him. That only made him start sniggering.

"Jerk!" I called him, not even trying to hide my smile.

He smiled back at me, but then he looked serious. "Have you seen it?" he asked tentatively.

"Seen what?" I asked, and then I realized what he must be referring to. "The interview? Have they aired it?"

Christian nodded, but his face remained impassive. "About an hour ago."

"Well...?" I asked impatiently. "What's the verdict?"

"I think the jury is still out," he replied, looking depressed. "Mixed reviews."

"That's what we expected, though, right?" I asked.

"Yes," he answered. "I wish..." he blew out a breath of frustration, very unlike him, and didn't finish his statement.

"What is it, Christian?" I asked. He was worrying me. "What do you wish?"

"That I weren't such a fuck up. That I'd never agreed to the interview. That I could protect you. There's some nasty shit being said about you already. I knew when I agreed that it was going to drag you down with me, but I guess I hoped... Now I'm wondering what I was thinking. No, I think I know what I was thinking. I was being the same selfish prick that I've always been. I'm really sorry, Ana."

"Christian, stop it," I said sternly. "It was my idea, remember?"

"I never should have agreed to it," he insisted.

"I would have done it anyway," I responded, just as firmly.

"Ana... remember that promise we made at the Zigzag Cafe? The moment you said you fell in love with me? I've already broken it!"

"Bullshit!" I exclaimed. "You have not harmed my business! This interview is NOT going to damage us! We're both private, so we don't have stock holders or a board of trustees to answer to. Even if we did, I don't think our sex life is any of their business. But I'm not completely naive. Yes, I realize that all of this might have negative short-term effects on current projects both at GEH and Ismintis, if people we're currently in talks with don't want to continue them because of things they hear about us in the media. We knew that going in. But it the long run, this is all going to blow over."

"I wish I could be as confident as you are about that," Christian lamented. "If it were just about me... I'm used to the media talking shit about me. But you... everything published about you until now has been positive."

"Well, that's not true either. They think I'm a pretentious bitch. And until a few days ago, a lesbian. And besides, I don't care about that. I don't care what some low-grade journalists are speculating about me."

Christian just stared at me for a minute. The emotions crossing his face didn't make me feel relieved at all. They ranged from worry, to fear, to desperation.

"Christian..." I finally said as I stood up and walked around my desk to face him. "You really need to..."

"I'm afraid," he interrupted me.

"Afraid of what?" I asked dumbly. "Christian... GEH and Ismintis are going to be..."

"I don't give a shit about that," Christian interrupted again. "I can't lose you, Ana. What if... You haven't even heard what they're saying about you yet. And it's because of me. You'd be better off without me. But I can't... I'd be a broken man without you."

I sighed, finally understanding the emotions I saw playing over his handsome face. My poor Christian. "I'm not going anywhere, Christian," I promised him. "I love you. I'm going to marry you. Stop worrying, OK?"

He smiled sadly. "I'm not sure it's possible to stop worrying, at least not while everyone in the country is still watching that damned video and talking about what a monster I am, and now they're including you in their hateful posts. I hope you're right, that it will all blow over, but I'm afraid. Lesser women that you would run for the hills. I'm amazed that you haven't, with all that has happened. But I know I'd fall apart if you did. You've turned my world upside down, do you realize that?"

"Ditto," I answered, and I embraced him. "I'd be lost without you too. Now, shut up and kiss me."

He complied, and we both got lost in the kiss. When we finally came up for air, I asked, "What time is Grace expecting us?"

"Seven. She's making dinner."

I checked the time and realized that since it was rush hour, we were probably going to be late. "We'd better get going."

About half an hour later, we stood at the door of Grey Manor, and Christian rang the doorbell. When Grace answered the door, he surprised her by embracing her. At first, she was taken off guard, and I could see that she didn't know what to do with her hands. She finally rested them tentatively on his shoulders.

When Christian released her from the hug, he held onto her, and she kept her hands on his shoulders. He looked her in the eyes and said, "I love you, Mom."

Grace's eyes filled with tears. "Christian," she whispered, and she drew him back into an embrace. "I love you, too, sweetheart. My dear, dear boy..."

"Mom, I should have told you that a long time ago. I'm sorry I waited so long."

"I've always known it, dear," Grace responded. She wiped her tears with her sleeve before she glanced around and asked, "Now, where's my granddaughter?"

Christian smiled. "Sorry, Mom. I know you're dying to see her, but we came straight from work. I promise... Saturday... I'll bring her over to spend the whole afternoon. Does that timeframe work for you?"

Grace nodded tearfully. At the same moment, Carrick walked into the foyer where we were all standing and called out, "Are you all going to stand at the door all night? Come in! Let's eat!"

Grace ignored Carrick because she had gotten a look at my hand... and the diamond glistening on it. "Come here, dear girl," she said, as she drew me into a hug. As she embraced me, she said to Christian, "You could have given us a heads-up, you know, instead of making us find out with the rest of the country that our son is engaged." The laughter in her tone proved that she wasn't angry.

"Sorry, Mom," Christian responded. "It just kind of... was the right timing. I'd planned on asking her this weekend."

"Well, congratulations to both of you, and welcome to the family, my dear Ana," Grace said, choking back her tears.

Carrick shook Christian's hand, and then kissed my cheek, but his congratulations didn't seem quite as sincere as Grace's. I didn't miss the worried look in his eyes, although he attempted to conceal it. He repeated his invitation to dine, and so we let him lead us to the dining room.

We spent the next hour having a nice family dinner and talking mostly about Christina. We avoided any mention of the video, although we knew from earlier conversations with them that Carrick and Grace had both seen at least some of it. They'd both also watched the interview, but other than commenting on our appearance and how well they think it went overall, we didn't discuss it. I was impressed with how sensitive they were to Christian's feelings. It was as if they both knew that he didn't need to be questioned at the moment about the things I'm sure they both really wanted to ask.

After dinner, we retired to the library, my favorite room in their home in spite of the altercation that had occurred there with Elena Lincoln, and Christian's subsequent reveal-all to his family. Just as we had begun to sip the glasses of brandy that Carrick had poured for us, Christian got a call that he said he had to take. He stepped out of the room, and Carrick seized the opportunity to ask me about Leila... and about my engagement to Christian.

In response to his question about Leila, I explained, "She's much sicker than she appeared in the interview. I haven't seen it yet, but I know how great she looked this morning, and unfortunately, that's not usually the case. She can only sit up a few hours each day. She sleeps a lot. We're just trying to keep her comfortable."

"I still don't quite understand why you did it, Ana," Carrick said. "But I'm grateful. That's my granddaughter that you've agreed to adopt, and from what I understand, you rescued her from... squaller, to say the least. I shudder to think what might have happened to her."

"I'm not a hero," I responded. "Christian was out of the country. I simply did what I thought he would want, and then I fell in love with Christina too. It all worked out well."

"I'd say so," Carrick responded. "But are you ready...? Christian has always been... special. Different. I think you're aware that you're his first... normal... relationship. And now, his being a father adds a whole new complication. I'm sure that only a few weeks ago, you'd never have imagined you'd have a ready-made family in such a short time. Perhaps... Not that I don't want you in our family, Ana... I do, very much. I'm just wondering if the two of you are moving a bit... too quickly."

"Carry, what are you talking about?" Grace admonished him. "We were married just a month after we met. When you know you've met the one, you know. You were it for me. I'm sure Christian feels the same way about Ana."

"I'm sure he does, sweetheart," Carrick responded to Grace. "I'm just worried about everything that's going on. You and I didn't have the... history, or the... issues... that Christian has always struggled with. And so much has happened in such a short time. He's fallen in love, found out he's a father, had an embarrassing secret leaked to the entire world... I'm not sure how much more he can take."

"He's not as fragile as you think he is," I countered.

"No, I'm not," Christian said from the door. His face was impassive, but I could see that he was angry.

"Christian, I didn't mean..." Carrick began, but Christian interrupted him.

"Dad, please... don't. I understand that you think we're moving too quickly, and I respect that. However, Ana and I are going to be married in four months, unless I can convince her to do it sooner than that."

"Four months!" Grace exclaimed. "That's hardly any time to plan! What have you done so far? Do you have a wedding planner yet?"

I giggled, which I could see immediately made Christian relax. "It's been a busy day, and we only got engaged last night, so no... no plans yet. No wedding planner yet. But we definitely need one. A good one."

"I know just the person," Grace said eagerly. "I'll email you her information."

I thanked Grace, and a few minutes later, we took our leave. Grace and Carrick both repeated their congratulations, but I sensed that Carrick still felt worried.

On the way home, as Taylor drove us, Christian held me tight as he told me about the telephone conversation he'd had earlier.

"It was Amaya Nolan. Number 7. She's the one I helped finish law school She told me she'd seen the interview, and that if I gave her my permission, she would, in her words, 'do what Leila did.' I was suspicious at first, but she insisted that she wasn't asking me for anything but permission to speak, and that she wasn't looking to sell her story to any tabloids. She said she'd create a youtube video and put the links on Facebook and Twitter. I warned her that she'd have paparazzi camped out at her house for the next month, but she insisted that even though she didn't want that kind of publicity, she didn't mind if it helped clear my name with the general public. Said she felt she owed it to me because of her own video, which she understands could be leaked at any time."

"So this is good news, right?" I asked. "You agreed to let her talk?"

"I told her that as long as she told the truth and cleared everything that she planned to say with me beforehand, I wouldn't enforce the NDA. And I believe her, that she wants to help. She was convincing. She also understands what she stands to lose if she double crosses me. But I don't think she's the kind of girl to do that."

"Well, she did create her own video and sell it to Elena," I reminded him.

"They all did," he agreed. "I think Elena made them believe somehow that they owed it to her. I'm not sure."

I asked him, "Are you sure she's not using the opportunity to gain some fame? Even if she isn't looking for a pay out?"

"No, I'm not sure, but she never seemed like the kind of person who wants that kind of fame. Granted, I didn't know her that well, so it's possible. But the way I see it, even if she has mixed motives, if she tells the truth about me, it can only help."

"It's risky," I said. "But hopefully, she'll collaborate Leila's description of you as a Dom."

"Yes, hopefully," he agreed. "And I made her promise to send me the video she makes before she posts it on any social media sites. She understands that I don't like surprises."

"You don't?" I asked seductively.

He snuggled closer to me and kissed my head. "Not that kind of surprise. Anyway, there's more," he said. "Apparently, she's in touch with a couple of the others. Numbers Eight and Ten. She said that they both have Doms, and they need to get their permission before contacting me, but that they also want to help me. Apparently, they're all disgusted by how the media has been talking about me since Leila's video was released, and they're all feeling guilty about their own videos. And she didn't mention it, but I'm sure they're all worried too about their own videos being leaked."

"Isn't that kind of weird?" I asked. "That your former submissives stay in touch with each other?"

Christian gave it a moment of thought. "Not really," he answered. "I mentioned before that some of them met each other. They have similar lifestyles, so it's not that odd that they became friends."

His explanation made sense. "So... what now?" I asked.

"I expect to hear from them," he answered.


	36. Chapter 36: Day of Reckoning (CPOV)

**Chapter 36: Day of Reckoning (Christian's POV)**

Amaya Nolan was true to her word. The next morning was Saturday, so Ana and I had just finished having breakfast and were snuggling on the sofa reading our emails on our laptops while Christina played with some of her toys on the floor near our feet, when I heard from Amaya again. She emailed a link to the Youtube video that she had created but not yet made public. If it were possible to make a Dom sound like a saint, she did as she described her time with me. I was astounded, and I wondered why she was doing it. Was it just guilt over the video she'd sold Elena? There had to be something more in it for her, but how could it be helpful, especially professionally, for her to come out as a submissive? Like Ana, she didn't seem very concerned about long-term negative repercussions. I couldn't help but feel suspicious, so I gave her a call to question her, to test her motives, before approving anything.

"Why?" I asked when she answered my call.

"What do you mean?" Amaya asked. "I explained that yesterday, Sir."

"I don't get it," I responded. "Why are you making me sound so... good? What do you want?"

"Nothing, Sir," she answered, but then she added. "Well... that's not completely true. No, I don't want anything from you per say, and I hope this helps in restoring your reputation. But what's in it for me is that I finally get to tell the world that I fucked Christian Grey. Yes, I know what people are going to say about me. But in the long-run, I will still be one of the few women who can make that claim to fame. So... thank you."

I wasn't sure how to respond to her matter-of-fact tone or her directness. Was she thanking me for fucking her or for allowing her to tell people that she'd fucked me? Either way, I knew I was going to allow her to do it. The positives outweighed the risks involved. I was still worried though, so I asked, "What are you going to tell the reporters when they start camping out at your home and workplace?"

"I'm going to tell them to watch the video, and that's all I have to say about it," she answered. It was obvious she'd already thought about it and had her answer planned out. She went on to add, "I give you my word, I do not intend to talk to the paps about you. I know they're going to try to buy my story. It's not for sale. I'm not into extortion, so I'm not asking you for anything. Besides, I'd have to lie to make you look bad, and I'm not into that either. I truly enjoyed our time together, as short as it was. I realize it's been a few years, but you were... unforgettable. Sir. And besides, I have every reason to be grateful to you, because I am one of the few associates in my law firm who aren't in debt up to their eyeballs in student loans, and I have you to thank for that."

"You realize that the video you sold Elena could still be released. In fact, this might even trigger him to release it, just to try to discredit you."

"If that happens, it won't discredit me," she argued. "It will just prove my claims. And if it does happen, which I hope with all my heart that it does not, then I'll talk to you again before I say anything about it. I hope we never see that fucking video again, but I'm not afraid of it. I can't take it back, and you forgave me for it already. I hope it doesn't cause you any more damage, but if it does, I'll do whatever I can to fix things."

I was still amazed at how determined she was to help me, and I still didn't get it, but I was satisfied that she was being sincere. "I really appreciate that," I told her.

I could tell that she probably sensed my suspicion when she explained, "Sir... you may not remember this... but I do. You were the perfect Dom, and I believed I was in love with you. Maybe I was... it doesn't really matter now. Even after you ended our contract, you paid for my law degree, so I was still crazy about you, long after I was with you. I got over you, and I'm happy now. I'm not in the lifestyle anymore, as you know, but I don't regret any of it. I am very happy to be able to do something to repay you, even in a small way."

Well, that was uncomfortable, to say the least, and I once again didn't know how to respond. I thanked her again awkwardly, and we ended the call. I looked at Ana, who had been quietly listening in, and told her, "She thinks I was the perfect Dom, and she was in love with me."

"Of course she was," Ana responded. "You're so lovable. I've been trying to tell you."

"I beat the shit out of her and didn't give a fuck about her," I said dryly.

Ana glanced down at Christina, who was now watching a video on Ana's phone not paying the least bit of attention to us, but Ana gave me an admonishing look anyway. OK, I guess I need to watch my language around my infant daughter. Ana mouthed the word "Bullshit." Then, out loud, she argued, "You cared about her. You paid for her law degree."

"It was a business arrangement," I explained.

"It was unnecessary," Ana argued. "It was a gift you chose to give her."

I decided to stop arguing with her. "I wish all my former subs were as amiable as Amaya and Leila."

Sadly, they weren't, as I soon found out. Within the next two hours, I heard from two others, plus one asshole who was the current Dom of another one. All of them wanted a payout, which I of course refused.

Trent O'Connor was the asshole Dom of Ramona Gregory, who regretfully had been my sixth sub, and the one who had lasted the shortest time, only two weeks. I'd terminated our contract when she showed up with needle marks on her arms. I always made it clear to all of my subs from the beginning that I have a zero tolerance policy with drugs. Since our time was so short, I was fairly certain that she'd never had a chance to make the video for Elena. She was one of the few that I hadn't contacted when Leila had broken the news of the videos two years ago. I didn't think there was a video, but even if there was, I knew for a fact that it wasn't one of the ones that Hyde had. Thanks to the pin drive that he'd given Ana, I knew exactly which six videos he had, including Leila's and Amaya's.

O'Connor threatened to make his sub tell the paps that I had forced myself on her. When I explained that I had evidence in the form of a signed contract that anything that Ramona Gregory and I had done together was completely consensual, and why it was in his best interest to shut the fuck up, he seemed to let it go. It turned out that O'Connor was an executive at Sunset Media, which of course was now a subsidiary of GEH. I let him know in no uncertain words what would become of his career if he continued to threaten me, much less carry through with any threats. I explained the uphill battle that Ramona would have trying to get anyone to believe her story considering her own past. Apparently, he wasn't aware that she had served time in a federal penitentiary. A few years after our little arrangement, she was arrested for a drug-related charge. I explained that it would be her word not just against mine but also the numerous other submissive women who would testify on my behalf. I was bullshitting through part of that, and secretly worried to hell that Ramona would carry through with the threat, but O'Connor seemed to see things my way by the end of the conversation. Just to be safe, I had Taylor put a tail on both of them. Just one more thing to add to the growing list.

Ana spent the morning answering emails and reading executive summaries that her staff had submitted that week, but she snuggled close to me the entire time. She comforted me each time the subs threatened me, and kept reassuring me that this was all going to blow over... with time. She had seen all of the shit in the press about her. Not all of it was negative, but the ones that made her look weak pissed me off royally. She took it all in stride, and she made sure to point out all the positive press that she came across.

One of those positive news stories included Leila and dubbed her "Grey's lavender savior," in reference to the color she was wearing in the interview. That one made me sound like an asshole, which was nothing new and fairly accurate, but it made her sound like an angel, which was also pretty spot on. There had been a number of negative reports about Leila, most speculating about how much I paid her to save my hide, and some even questioning whether she was really ill. If Leila knew about the negative press, she didn't mention it. Actually, she had been sleeping so much since the interview that I wasn't sure how much news she'd heard since then.

The subs expecting a payoff pissed me off, especially considering the fact that they were the ones responsible for the damn videos in the first place, but none of them concerned me like the text that I received later that morning.

"Your day of reckoning has finally arrived, Sir. Today, you will pay for your sins."

That was all it said, and it was sent from an unknown number. I knew from security protocol not to respond, and I instead immediately alerted Taylor, who got Welch to look into it, who confirmed my suspicions that it was from a burner phone, so there was no way to trace it. Welch reminded me of how many threats I received each week, implying that this was probably nothing. But it was unusual to receive threats on my private cell phone, so I felt unnerved.

Ana also seemed a bit ruffled by the text, which she'd read over my shoulder. She suggested that I stay home instead of taking Christina to my parents', as I had promised my mom I would. But I couldn't stop living my life every time an unfounded threat came my way. Besides, I felt sure that this was another one of my former subs. Maybe she still had a copy of her video, and she planned to release it herself, and then tell lies about it. I had been waiting for that ball to drop, realizing that any of them could get me arrested if she claimed I had assaulted and raped her, and that the video proved it. I was fucking worried, but all I could do was wait and hope that my fears were not realized.

Late in the morning, Ana took a break from her work to show me a wedding venue that she wanted us to consider. Honestly, I didn't care where we got married. I just wanted to do it, the sooner the better. I asked her again if she'd consider moving our date up at least one month.

"I just don't want to wait to call you Mrs. Grey," I explained. But then I felt confused by the look on her face. Why did she look uncomfortable?

"Yeah, about that," she said hesitantly. "I'd wanted to put off talking about this until things calm down a little. I don't... I mean, I love you, Christian, and I love who you are... but the world knows me as Anastasia Steele. Ismintis International is Anastasia Steele. I'm not sure what message it will send to the world if I change my name to Anastasia Grey. My name is like a commodity, just like yours is."

I felt shocked. I hadn't seen this coming at all. How could she not want to take my name? "But Ana... you're my family. You and Christina are mine. How can you not be Greys? It just... won't make sense."

"It makes perfect sense, Christian," she answered calmly. "You're Christian Grey. I'm Anastasia Steele. Christina and any future children we have... well, I'd like to hyphenate their names. Steele-Grey."

"No fucking way," I objected. "I thought I made that clear to you. My daughter is a Grey. There's no fucking way in hell our kids are going to be Steele-Greys. I think Christina has a fucking Crayola crayon that color."

"She's too little for crayons, Christian," Ana argued, still too calmly. "She'd only eat them."

I stood up from the sofa and began to pace the room. How could she be so fucking calm? How could she decide not to change her name and tell me about it like this? Why didn't she want to be a Grey? Was she ashamed to associate herself with me? Was it because of the videos?

Ana apparently saw the hurt and confusion on my face. She put down her laptop and stood up, talked towards me, and put her arms around me. "Christian, I love you. I love everything about you, including your name. But I love my own name too. And I just don't see why I should change it."

I was too hurt to respond. I realized that she didn't think it was a big deal, but to me, it was a very big deal. I wanted more than anything for the world to know that she was Mrs. Christian Grey. I needed her to change her name, but I understood that she wanted to hold on to her independence. I knew I was being selfish, so I needed to let it go, somehow. But I sure as hell didn't know how to do that, at least not at the moment.

For the next couple of hours, I couldn't talk to Ana. I was too angry and hurt with her, but I didn't want to take it out on her. We hardly spoke again before I left with Christina for my parents' house. Ana had already explained that she couldn't take the afternoon off to go with us to Bellevue, so it had nothing to do with our disagreement. She had too many tasks to finish if she was going to spend all of the next day with me on the _Grace_ , as we had planned. It was when I had originally planned to propose to her, but I didn't regret getting ahead of myself. Not at all. Now, if only I could convince her to change her name, everything would be perfect.

And so it was, as soon as Christina woke up from her nap, that the two of us set off with Taylor to spend the afternoon with the proud grandparents, leaving Ana still camped out on my sofa with her laptop, seemingly delirious to my pain at her refusal to take my name. When Christina and I got to Grey Manor, I was surprised but humored to find that my mom had already set up a playroom (the kind appropriate for an 18-month old) and nursery for Christina, complete with a crib and the same rocking chair that she used to rock Mia asleep in. I had many fond memories of that rocking chair, and now, we were going to create new ones with my baby girl.

While mom played with Christina in the baby's playroom, which she had already stocked with more toys than a baby could ever imagine... she must have cleaned out Toys-R-Us... I talked with Dad. He caught me up on the latest with Isaac, who he had kept in close contact with since his release from the hospital. Apparently, Isaac's therapy was going well, and amazingly, he had not gotten behind in school at all. Dad also knew more about the FBI investigation into Isaac's father... if that's what you wanted to call him. Joseph Horowitz was in reality not any better a father to Isaac than my own sperm donor had been to me. The only difference was that he had actually been briefly married to Brenda. Dad said that Joseph was likely to be arrested any day due to the evidence that the FBI investigation had uncovered of his dealings with minors. I was disgusted, but glad that we'd involved the FBI when we had. I only regretted being blinded by Elena's lies for so many years. There was no question now that she had been involved in the trafficking of minors, and I had probably indirectly supported her illegal endeavors by keeping her legal ones afloat. Dad reminded me that she had fooled us all, not just me. He also reminded me that she could no longer be a threat to anyone. In fact, her ex-husband had been the one to fulfill her wishes to scatter her ashes in the Pacific. There had not been a funeral or any kind of memorial service for her. No one had mourned her loss, at least not publicly.

Dad also asked me about Jack Hyde, and I had to admit that we still had no idea where he was. A couple of days had passed since he had totally gone off the grid, and still Welch, Barney and Samantha, and everyone else Taylor had searching for him, had nothing. It was more than a little unnerving.

We had been at Grey Manor a couple of hours when I received another cryptic text from an unknown number. This time, the wording was slightly different: "Baby bird will soon regret he's alive. His day of reckoning has finally arrived."

A chill ran up my spine when I read it. I wasn't sure whether this was from the same person as the earlier text, and I didn't understand the bird reference. It didn't seem coincidental to me, however, that Dad and I had just been talking about Jack Hyde. Could this be him? The fact that he'd threatened Ana never left my mind, which is one of the main reasons I made sure she was never anywhere without security. I showed this latest text to Taylor, who alerted Welch again. As before, there was no way to trace the text because it came from a burner phone. I felt unnerved, and I wanted to leave immediately to get back to Escala, back to Ana.

I went to get Christina ready to leave, but when I saw my mom playing on the floor with her, I didn't have the heart to separate them so soon. Besides, I had no way of knowing if this was a real threat, or if it was a hoax, and I knew that the security at Escala was the best of the best. Ana was safe there, of that I was sure.

About fifteen minutes after I got the text, Taylor found me in the baby's playroom with mom and Christina. "Sir, we have to go. Now."

When I saw the look on Taylor's face, I knew that this was no hoax. "What is it, Taylor?" I asked as I began to gather Christina's things.

He responded urgently, "The silent alarm was triggered. It happens when someone opens the door between the two penthouses, between your place and Ms. Steele's.

"But people go through that door several times everyday," I pointed out as I picked up Christina and started to put her sweater on her.

"Yes, sir, and normally it isn't an issue. It's a simple phone call to determine that there is no threat. Reynolds is on duty at your penthouse, and Sawyer at Ms. Steele's. Neither of them is answering their phone."

"Did you try Gail?" I asked.

"She's at her sister's this weekend," he reminded me. "The only other staff who should be at either penthouse is Ms. Williams' nurse. She isn't answering her phone either."

I handed Christina to Mom and called Ana. I began to panic when she didn't pick up, which my perceptive mother did not miss.

"Christian," Mom said. "Leave Christina here. I can take care of her, and I really want to. Go! Make sure Ana's OK."

I didn't argue. "Thanks, Mom!" I responded, and I hugged her quickly, which made her tear up, but I didn't have time to acknowledge it. I didn't even say goodbye to Dad before Taylor and I were in my SUV rushing towards Escala.

Taylor must have broken every traffic law, but it still felt like an hour before we got there. It was in reality probably under twenty minutes. On the way, I tried Ana's phone again a few times, and each time there was no answer, my sense of panic deepened. I knew something was terribly wrong... I could feel it in my gut.

My private elevator also seemed to take more time than usual, but finally, we arrived inside my penthouse. Taylor insisted I wait for him to clear the place first, but when we heard a gunshot, I ignored him and leaped up the stairs, in the direction that the gunshot had come from. I had to get to Ana.

Within a couple of seconds, I was at the top of the stairs, and I could see down the long hallway. There, at the open door of my playroom, I saw something that made my blood run cold. Leila lay crumpled on the floor with a gun next to her unconscious body. Dear God, Leila? What had she done?

It took a few seconds for my brain to process what I was seeing, and in that time, Taylor was kneeling next to Leila, checking for a pulse. "She's gone, sir," he told me. "Don't touch the gun. The police will..."

I didn't wait to hear the rest of his sentence, because I knew Ana was inside the room. I rushed through the door, and my heart stopped at what I saw. Oh God, no! My sweet princess was hanging on the Saint Andrews Cross, naked, bloody and bruised. She'd been beaten... badly. My panic only increased more because I wasn't sure whether she was even alive. Had Leila shot her?

A mournful wail filled the room, and it took me a minute to realize that it was coming from me. At the same moment, my princess's eyes flickered open. Oh, thank God! I ran to her and began to release her restraints. "I've got you, princess," I said gently. I didn't even realize that there were tears running down my face until I felt something wet there.

"Christian," she tried to say, but all that came out of her mouth was a whisper.

"Police! Hands where I can see them!" a voice yelled loudly from the playroom door.

I didn't stop releasing Ana from the cuffs. "Paramedics!" I called back to the police officer. "She needs medical attention! Now!"

"Put your fucking hands where I can see them, now!" the police officer insisted.

"I will as soon as she's down from here," I answered as calmly as I could. As I was speaking, the paramedics entered the room, and ordered me to step back. I complied, and put my hands up so the fucking police officer wouldn't shoot me.

"Christian!" Ana cried, and this time I could hear her tortured voice, faintly. "Don't leave me!"

"I'm here, princess!" I reassured her.

"Jack Hyde," she said in a stronger but panicked voice. "He's here. He did this. He has a gun. Where is he?"

"It's OK, Ana, Jack Hyde is dead," Taylor's reassuring voice took over. "He can't hurt you anymore." I looked at him questioningly, and he pointed at the floor. I had been so focused on Ana that I hadn't noticed the body lying there.

While the paramedics strapped Ana to a stretcher, she cried out for me again, and I took her hand in mine. She clung to me and cried again, "Don't leave me!"

"What the hell happened here?" a different police officer asked from the door. "And what the fuck is this room? A torture chamber?"

Today, that is exactly what it had been, but I didn't say that... or anything... to the officer. Instead, Taylor once again took charge. He pointed out the three video cameras in the room that were still running. Yes, three. Hyde had clearly wanted to make sure to document his torture of my beloved, from various angles. Taylor explained to the police who Hyde was and his relationship to Ana. He was still talking with the police when I left the room with the paramedics. Ana was still clinging to my hand, and I had no intention of letting her go. The police did not object to my leaving, as they seemed satisfied from Taylor's explanation that we had only just arrived and had not been responsible for the crimes that happened here today.

In the ambulance, I found out how severe my sweet Ana's injuries were. My princess had lacerations all over her body, and several deep stab wounds. But thankfully, no gunshot wounds. Nevertheless, she'd lost a lot of blood from the stab wounds, and she lost consciousness on the way to the hospital. I thought later that it was a good thing she hadn't been awake when I'd learned that she'd been sexually assaulted. If Hyde weren't already dead, I would kill him with my bare hands.


	37. Chapter 37: Hyde Attacks (APOV)

**Chapter 37: Hyde Attacks (Anastasia's POV)**

I sighed and closed my laptop. Christian and Christina had been gone for over an hour, and I hadn't been able to concentrate on my work since before they left. I just couldn't get Christian's anger and disappointment... and hurt... out of my mind. It was obvious that he really wanted me to change my name when we married. It was important to him that I become Mrs. Christian Grey. Well, I wanted that too, just not an official name change. I wanted to be his, but I still wanted to be Anastasia Steele too. Why couldn't I have both?

I stood up and gazed out the window at the Seattle skyline. The sun was already beginning to set over Elliot Bay, although it was impossible to see it in the usual overcast weather. At least it wasn't pouring down rain. I sighed again. I really didn't want to hurt Christian. Was I being selfish, insisting on keeping my maiden name? What would it mean to Ismintis International if I changed my name to Grey? Would my stakeholders not immediately associate me with GEH? Why couldn't Christian understand my reasoning?

I decided that I needed a distraction, and it had been a while since I'd checked in on Leila. She had been sleeping almost constantly since the interview had aired. I could see how much weaker she'd gotten in just a couple of days, and I didn't expect her to be here much longer. I wanted to make sure that her last days were as comfortable as possible. I went to the door that separated my penthouse from Christian's. His had actually become more home to me than my own. I didn't say anything to Christian's security officer, Reynolds, who I assumed was in Christian's security office. I knew that Luke was on duty at my place, and he'd alert Reynolds to my whereabouts as soon as the door alarm went off. The silent alarm was a security feature that Christian and I had both insisted on when we'd had the door installed.

As soon as I entered my penthouse, I was shocked at what I found. Luke was lying in the foyer, and... was that blood? Oh my God! Luke was unconscious... or was he dead? His head was bleeding badly.

Before I had a chance to even react to the shocking sight, I heard loud voices. I felt terrified, and I looked for a hiding place. The coat closet. I slipped quickly inside, as quietly as possible.

"You didn't tell me nobody was gonna get hurt!" I recognized the voice of Hillary, the nurse on duty for Leila.

"You're right," an eerily calm voice answered. At first, I didn't recognize it, but with his next words, I was able to clearly identify the voice I'd come to hate. Jack Hyde. "I didn't tell you. You stupid bitch." And then, I heard a gunshot. It wasn't loud, but it was recognizable. It was followed by a crash. My God. Jack Hyde had just shot Hillary the nurse. I was sure of it. I stayed glued to my spot, terrified of what would happen if Jack found me.

"You can come out now, Princess Anastasia," his taunting voice called out. "I know you're behind this door." His voice was closer now. I wasn't sure whether I should stay hidden or open the door and face him. But I knew he had a gun and that he'd just shot one person, and probably two. He had probably shot Luke before I arrived. My God, Luke! Was he dead, or dying?

I didn't have a chance to decide what to do. The next moment, the door was thrown open, and Hyde stood there leering at me. "Why do you never fucking do as you're told? Two fucking years I worked for you. You never listened."

I knew by the look in his eyes that he was going to kill me. I decided that I should take my chances and try to run away from him. I pushed him as hard as I could, which caught him off guard and made him fall backwards. But he regained his balance and was after me in a flash. Before I'd even gotten a few feet, I felt a sharp pain on the back of my head. Then, everything went black.

I have no idea how much time passed before I woke up, and I wasn't sure even then if I was awake or if I was having the most horrible nightmare I'd ever had. My head was aching so badly I thought I must have a migraine, even though I'd never had one before. I knew even before I opened my eyes from the smell of wood and lemon-scented furniture polish that I was in Christian's playroom. How did I get here? I was naked and bound to what I realized was the spanking bench. I wondered for a moment what was going on, but then I heard it. That disgusting voice that I'd never wanted to hear again. Jack Hyde. I remembered what had just happened... how long ago was that? Luke! Was he dead? And Hillary the nurse, too. Hyde had shot them both!

"It appears that her royal highness has decided to finally grace us with her presence," he sneered. "Welcome to your worst nightmare, Princess Anastasia."

"Jack," I spoke as strongly as I could, wanting to show him that I wasn't afraid of him, even though I was terrified. "What are you doing?"

He laughed sinisterly. "What I'm doing, your highness, is finally getting my revenge on that son of a bitch who stole my life. Sorry, Princess Anastasia. It's nothing personal even though I think you're a royal bitch. You don't deserve to die just for being a pretentious bitch. This is really about your lover. He deserves to watch you die. And he's going to." Jack moved around in the room. I noticed video cameras that were already recording.

"I don't understand," I told him, still maintaining my fearless tone as best I could. "What do you have against Christian? Why are you doing this, Jack?"

"That bastard stole my life. It should have been me that the Greys adopted. I was next. And that little shit came right in and robbed me of my new parents. They took him instead of me. I grew up on the streets because of him. I had to struggle for everything. All because of him. So now, it's time for him to pay. He took from me what mattered the most, so now, I'm going to take from him what he cares most about. You." He looked at one of the cameras and said tauntingly, "You hear me, baby bird? This is your day of reckoning. Welcome to Hell!"

I tried reasoning with him. "Jack, I'm sure Christian had nothing to do with whatever you're talking about. He was only four when he was adopted. He couldn't have possibly known..."

"Shut the fuck up," Jack cut me off. "I don't give a flying fuck what you think you know. It doesn't matter, Miss Know-It-All. You're not as smart as you think you are, you know. You gave me everything I needed in that fucking interview that you televised. Saint Anastasia, setting up her palace in the sky for Grey's baby mamma. Hiring nannies and nurses. You gave me my in by announcing that shit. You thought you were saving his ass. Well, fuck you." He looked at one of the cameras again and said, "In fact, that's exactly what I'm going to do. Fuck you. Hard, just the way you like it. Actually, first, I'm going to make use of some of the toys that you and your boyfriend like. Thanks to me, the whole world knows what he likes to do to his women before he fucks them."

"Jack..." I tried again, but he cut me off.

"I thought I told you to shut up," he said angrily. But then with creepy calmness, he ran his hands through my hair and said, "It doesn't matter, you know. You can beg all you want, and it won't stop what's going to happen. I am going to beat the hell out of you, just like Grey beats his women. Then I'm going to fuck you while he watches me. And then, I'm going to kill you. You can't stop me, and neither can he."

His words shocked me so badly that I couldn't speak for a moment. I watched as Jack examined some of the floggers and crops that were hanging on the wall. Thank God Christian had gotten rid of the canes and other more heavy-duty whips and stuff.

"Jack, don't do this," I begged, even though by now, I knew it wouldn't do any good.

"Is this all he has?" Jack asked, more to himself than me. "These are wimpy. But I'll have to make do." He took a riding crop from the wall, and without any warning, he hit me with it, much harder than Christian ever had. It knocked the breath out of me, but he didn't stop. I lost count of how many times he hit me.

I'm not sure how much time passed before I heard the crop hit the floor. My eyes were squeezed shut, and I didn't open them as Jack grumbled. "Pansy-assed toys. She's barely even bleeding yet." I heard him moving around, and I opened my eyes to see him holding one of Christian's floggers, tying something shiny to the end of it.

Then, I experienced the most excruciating pain, worse than my wildest imagination, as he began to flog me. Every time he hit me, I felt my skin ripping off my body. Then, just as I didn't think this nightmare could get any worse, it did. And as he invaded my body, I found myself leaving it. I went back in time, to the first time I ever watched _The Sound of Music_ with my mom and Ray.

I heard my mom's off-key voice singing, and it was beautiful. "… Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens. Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens. Brown paper packages tied up with strings. These are a few of my favorite things..."

Then, we were walking along the coastline. All three of were together again, and I was probably nine or ten years old. We came across a puppy who'd been abandoned and was starving. We'd had a picnic, and I still had part of my sandwich left, which I fed her. We played frisbee for a couple of hours, and I was amazed and delighted that the little dog could already catch it in her mouth. When it was time for us to leave, I begged them to let me keep her. Mom was all for it, but Ray not so much. But I convinced him. Bandit became my first pet. Ray had pitched a fit a few times about her... it had taken a while to house break her... but he eventually came to love her as much as I did.

I was shocked back to reality when my body was dragged off of the spanking bench. He pulled me by the hair and drug me across the room to the Saint Andrews Cross. When my shredded back hit the wood, I passed out. From then on, I was in and out of consciousness. I knew he was continuing to brutalize me, and I knew he had a knife. A big fucking knife. He was stabbing me with it. He was going to slit my throat with it. I knew I was going to die. There was no hope of surviving. But I was also souring over Elliot Bay with Christian. Parasailing. Then, we were climbing Mount Kilimanjaro. Then, he was letting me drive his car. The Audi Spider. Somewhere nearby, a car backfired. Then, a loud wail filled the room. What was that? I opened my eyes, coming back to reality. Where was Hyde? Was I dead yet? Christian?

"I've got you, princess," my dream Christian said lovingly. If only he were really here. If only I were still alive. But I felt him releasing my restraints. Was this real?

"Christian," I tried to speak, but nothing came out of my mouth because I was dead, and dead people can't talk. Everything went black again, and I was back out on the water with Christian, jet skiing. The water was spraying my face, and we were both laughing.

I was jolted back to reality again when I felt myself moving. I opened my eyes and realized that there were medical workers moving me from the Saint Andrews Cross and onto a stretcher. This was real. Christian was really here, and so were the paramedics.

"Christian!" I cried out as loudly as I could. If I were really alive, wouldn't he be able to hear me? "Don't leave me!"

"I'm here, princess!" I heard his panicked voice trying to calm me, but that was impossible. Where was my attacker. What if he attached Christian?

"Jack Hyde," I warned him. "He's here. He did this. He has a gun. Where is he?"

The voice that responded to me was Taylor's ,not Christian's. "It's OK, Ana, Jack Hyde is dead. He can't hurt you anymore."

I wasn't sure if Taylor was telling me the truth, and I was terrified. "Don't leave me!" I begged Christian. I heard Taylor talking to the police, but thank God Christian was coming with me. I clung to his hand as the paramedics took me on the stretcher to the elevator. I think I passed out again in the elevator, but I remember being loaded into the ambulance.

As the ambulance rushed me to the hospital, I remembered those fucking video cameras. "Promise me," I said to Christian.

"Anything!" he responded frantically.

"Promise me... whether I live or... die. Promise me... you'll never watch the video footage."

I don't know if Christian agreed with my request or not because when I closed my eyes, I did not open them again.


	38. Chapter 38: Anastasia Awakens (CPOV)

**Chapter 38: Anastasia Awakens (Christian's POV)**

Beep.

Beep.

Beep.

The mumbling voices of unknown people sitting somewhere nearby.

The taste of stale coffee that someone gave me.

My brother's calming voice.

His girlfriend/Domme's sniffling.

Somewhere in my brain, I register Kate's swollen, bloodshot eyes.

I also register the hatred in Raymond Steele's eyes as he looks at me with disdain. He is right. His daughter wouldn't be lying here in this hospital bed fighting for her life if it weren't for me. I did this. Not that fucking sack of shit Hyde, but me. She would have been better off if she'd never met me.

And then I hear another voice, the voice of my angel. "Christian, how are you, sweetheart? Has she woken up at all yet?"

"Not yet, Mom," I whisper in reply. It's all I can manage. I glance up at her, remembering the other love of my life. I left her in Mom's charge yesterday. "Where's Christina?" I ask.

"She's fine," Mom reassured me. "Mia and Leo are watching her at Grey Manor. Your security guy Ryan is there. She's perfectly safe."

Perfectly safe, I thought to myself. Would I ever trust that anyone in my life was perfectly safe again? I'd thought Ana was perfectly safe the day before, and look what happened. I glanced over at Dad, who was sitting next to Raymond Steele. They had been chatting… I'm not sure what about. "You have guards at the gate?"

"Yes, son," Dad spoke just as reassuringly as Mom had. "The paparazzi can't get anywhere near our home. And the only people coming in and out have been vetted not only directly by me but also by Taylor. It's a fortress."

I nodded in acknowledgement. I'm not sure how many hours had passed since I'd been sitting here holding Ana's lifeless hand, waiting for her to wake up. The doctors had said that since she was heavily sedated, that she wasn't likely to wake up until later today, and even then, she would probably be out of it for a while, probably for several days.

I'd learned over the past few hours that there was a difference between sedation and a medically induced coma. Ana was under heavy sedation due to her injuries, but not in a coma. She had spent the entire night in the OR. Several vital organs, including her liver, colon, and small intestine had to be repaired due to the stab wounds to her chest and abdomen. She'd almost bled to death, but a blood transfusion had saved her life. Thank God her heart and lungs had been spared, although she did have several broken ribs. Her female organs were also uninjured, in spite of the brutal rape. She'd also suffered a severe concussion, probably from being hit on the head by Hyde. The detectives speculated that he'd hit her with the butt of his gun and knocked her out before taking her to my playroom. I would never know exactly what she'd suffered there. I would keep my promise that I made her in the ambulance and never watch the video footage, even though part of me wanted to, just to try to make sense of this senseless act. But no, I'd promised her, even if she didn't survive, that I would never watch it. But my beloved was going to survive this brutal attack. She had to, and I knew in my gut that she was a survivor, perhaps more now than ever.

A medically induced coma was what Ana's CPO Sawyer was in, to try to reduce the swelling to his brain. Hyde had shot him in the head, just as he had my own security detail Reynolds. The difference was that Sawyer had somehow survived while Reynolds had probably died instantly according to the paramedics. Sawyer's doctors had used the same language that Ana's had: "not out of the woods yet," but the swelling was going down, and the doctors were planning to bring him out of the coma in a few more hours. I hoped he made it, for Ana's sake. I knew he was more than just her CPO, but also a friend.

There had been four dead bodies and two seriously injured ones when Taylor and I had arrived at Escala the day before. Ana and Sawyer were the only survivors. Hyde, Leila, Reynolds, and the nurse who'd been taking care of Leila, whose name I didn't remember, were all dead. It was clear to everyone who witnessed the carnage that Leila had shot Hyde. The gun lying next to her body was Sawyer's, so she must have found him in Ana's penthouse and taken it. She had been the one to call 911. The police had already been alerted when the silent alarm had gone off and none of my staff had responded to it, but they had not come immediately for some reason. Taylor was looking into it.

For hours, I'd been sitting here trying to figure out how all of this had happened. Earlier in the day, Taylor had forced me to walk down to the cafeteria with him, just to stretch my legs. We both knew from what the doctors had told us that Ana wasn't going to wake up for a few more hours, and Taylor thought I needed some fresh air. We had speculated about what we thought must have happened.

"Leila's nurse had to have let Hyde in," Taylor told me. "It's the only way he could have gotten past the security in Escala's main lobby, or into Ana's penthouse without alerting Sawyer. It's clear that he caught both Sawyer and Reynolds off guard."

"How did he know?" I pondered. "He had to have known I wasn't there, and that Ana was. And that I was going to be gone for a while."

"The nurse probably told him," Taylor speculated. "She knew you didn't have a nanny yesterday afternoon, that you were taking Christina out. She also knew that Ms. Steele was staying at home. It was why Sawyer was there, instead of with Ms. Steele. Ms. Prescott had the day off. The nurse knew all of this."

I considered his words. "We should have both had more than one security officer on duty at Escala."

"Hindsight's twenty-twenty," Taylor muttered. "We couldn't have possibly foreseen any of this."

"We should have," I insisted. "This is what I pay you for."

Taylor looked offended for a fraction of a second, but he masked it quickly. "Yes, sir," he replied stoically. "I'll hire more security."

I sighed. Taylor was right, we couldn't have anticipated any of this, but we should have done a better job of making sure our homes were secure. We had been too careless, and I would never make the same mistake again.

There was something else that had been nagging at me. "How did that bastard know about my playroom?" I asked aloud, even though I didn't expect Taylor to know the answer.

"What makes you think he knew anything about it?" Taylor asked. "He probably just guessed you had one, because of the videos. Ms. Steele was most likely unconscious... The goose egg on her head is evidence that he knocked her out at some point. He probably looked for it until he found it."

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to get the image of Hyde knocking Ana out... hitting her hard enough to leave that goose egg. "The door to the playroom was locked. How did he get in?" I asked.

Taylor looked at me like I had two heads. "A locked door… the only locked door… that's what gave it away. All he had to do was pick the lock."

I sighed. After a few moments of companionable silence, I told Taylor, "I can't go back there. To Escala. And I sure as hell can't take Ana back there, once she's well enough to go home. I'm not sure what she'll want to do with her penthouse, but I don't want to go back to mine. I _can't_ go back to mine."

"What do you want to do?" Taylor asked me. "Where do you want to live?"

"I want to buy a house. A family house. Maybe in Bellevue, near Mom and Dad, but I'd prefer Mercer Island or Medina, still not too far from them."

"You want me to look for a house for you?" Taylor clarified.

"Yeah," I answered. "Make sure it has plenty of land, so we can build homes for you and Gail and other long-term staff."

"Sir, are you sure…" Taylor started to ask me.

"Yes," I cut him off. I added, definitively, "I will never return to Escala."

Taylor nodded. "Do you want to list your two penthouses there, sir?" he asked. "I can ask Mrs. Jones to start getting the staff penthouse in order."

I shook my head. "There's no need to do that yet. Mine's still a… crime scene." Damn if my voice didn't crack as I said that. I rubbed my forehead, trying to ease the ache between my eyes. "I need to get back to Ana," I told Taylor.

We walked silently back to Ana's room. All the way, I was wondering how she was going to be once she finally woke up. Would she remember everything that happened to her? I knew that concussions sometimes caused amnesia, at least temporarily. I thought it would be an act of mercy if she blocked out everything that Hyde had done to her.

Ana slept the entire day. She didn't awaken until sometime during the night. Mom and Dad had left hours earlier, taking Raymond Steele with them. They'd invited him to stay in one of their guest rooms. He still refused to talk to me, but he had talked at length with both of my parents, and even longer with Kate, whom he knew well because of her long-term friendship with Ana. Of course, he had no idea about Kate's proclivities. Nevertheless, I could see that he felt close to her and trusted her opinion. I could also see by the way she occasionally glanced at me when she was speaking with him that she was putting in a good word for me. Hopefully, his bad opinion of me would improve over time.

I had, after all, been the one to call Mr. Steele after we'd arrived at the ER and I had been banished to the waiting area. I knew he'd been suspicious at first that I had been the one to attack Ana… that damn video had given him the idea that I could do such a thing. In fact, he wasn't the only one speculating such things… the paparazzi had shown up at the hospital sometime that night, and they hadn't left. Somehow, they had finally gotten the facts somewhat straightened out that Hyde had been Ana's attacker, and that he was dead. It didn't completely stop the speculation about me though. But at the moment, I couldn't be bothered about it. My beloved needed me.

Kate and Elliot stayed longer than everyone else, hoping that Ana would wake up while they were there. But they finally had to go, promising that they'd be back early the next morning. I'd also sent Taylor home to rest, and Ana's other security officer, Prescott, was standing guard outside the hospital room. I knew Ana would be angry when she woke up if I didn't allow her own staff to do their jobs, so I didn't argue with Taylor when he suggested it.

The hospital staff had set up a cot for me in Ana's room, but I didn't bother to lie down since I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep. Instead, I sat in a chair next to her, watching her sleep, holding her hand, rubbing it gently with my thumb. Amazingly enough, Hyde had not done much damage to her face. There was the goose egg on her head where he'd hit her, but she only had a few scratches on her face, not deep cuts like the rest of her body. She was paler than normal, but still the most beautiful woman I'd ever laid eyes on. She looked like she was resting peacefully, which made me feel slightly more relaxed. At some point, I must have dozed off, resting my head on my other hand. I felt her hand on my head, which roused me from my slumber, and I quickly raised my head to look into those ocean blue eyes that were finally open.

"Christian," she whispered. Immediately, she started coughing, so I took the cup of water from the table next to her bed.

"Small sips," I told her, not sure how I knew that she shouldn't drink it too quickly. Once I determined that she was OK, I stroked her face and told her, "I love you, princess. I'm so glad you're finally awake."

Ana stared at me blankly for a moment or two. Then she began to look at herself, taking in the bandages covering her body. I could see tears forming in her eyes, so I took her hand and told her lovingly, "Don't cry, baby. You're OK. My strong girl, you survived. You're going to be just fine."

Ana didn't speak again for a few moments, and I stroked her face and hair, trying to comfort her without hurting her.

Finally she whispered again, "Hyde. It was Jack Hyde." She looked at me with eyes full of fear.

Well, damn. So much for hoping she wouldn't remember. "He's dead," I told her reassuringly. "He'll never hurt you again."

She looked in my eyes to see that I was telling the truth. "How?" she asked, finally finding her voice.

"We believe Leila shot him," I told her. "The police are still investigating, but that's how it looks."

"Leila?" Ana asked, sounding astonished. "I thought… I didn't think she could… She was so weak." She lay back in the bed and looked up at the ceiling, collecting her thoughts. "Is she…?" She swallowed before she finished her question. I think she already knew the answer. "How is Leila?"

"She didn't make it," I answered bluntly.

Ana sighed and closed her eyes. Without opening them, she asked, "Did Hyde kill her?"

God damn it! So much for the doctor's prognosis that Ana would be out of it when she woke up. Should we really be having this conversation so soon after she woke up? I sighed, not really knowing how to reply, but I answered her question. "I don't think so. The police are still investigating, but… Leila probably… died of natural causes."

Silent tears were running down Ana's face, but she still didn't open her eyes. I wiped the tears with my hand as Ana spoke with her eyes closed. "She saved my life. He was going to kill me. He had a knife. He was going to slit my throat." She opened her eyes and reached for me.

"Ana, I don't want to hurt you," I told her as I put my arms around her as gently as I could. "You've been through a lot. Your body… You've had major surgery to repair the…" I couldn't finish my sentence, but I told her instead, "It's going to take some time for you to heal."

Ana lay back again, but she gripped my hand. Her grip was weaker than normal, but not as weak as I expected her to be after all she'd been through. My girl still had some strength in her. She was quiet for a few more moments before she looked at her hand in alarm. "Christian… my brain is… fuzzy. But I didn't dream it. Did I? I had a… Where is my…? Are we…?" She blew out a breath of frustration, and I couldn't help but notice the adorable little wrinkle that appears between her eyes when she's confused. Now wasn't the time to comment on it though.

I wanted to help, but I couldn't understand what she was upset about. "What is it, Princess?"

Ana reached her hand that I wasn't holding, the one with the IV in it, to her forehead and rubbed it. Her whole face was wrinkled in concentration. "No… I don't have any gaps. I remember everything clearly. You did ask me. I didn't dream it. In your office after… after that video was released. You asked me, and I said yes. Then, that same night, you asked me again. You put a ring on my finger. I know you did. It really happened. But… where is my ring?"

Oh! That was what she was upset about? "Ana, you had major surgery. Several of your organs had to be repaired. They don't let you wear jewelry in the operating room. I have your ring, sweetheart, and I'll put it back on your finger as soon as you're well enough to get out of here."

"Do you have it here?" Ana asked impatiently.

"Right here in my pocket," I assured her.

"I want it," she insisted. "I need it on my finger. I need to feel… like I'm… me."

To hell with hospital guidelines. I took the ring from my pocket and slipped it on her finger. "I love you, and I can hardly wait to marry you," I assured her as I kissed her chapped lips chastely.

"I love you, Christian," she whispered. She closed her eyes, and I thought she was going to go back to sleep, but then she opened them widely and looked at me again in alarm. "Oh, shit! Ismintis! How am I…? Oh, shit! I don't even have a fucking COO! My batshit crazy ex-COO almost killed me, and now… How the hell am I going to run my company?!" Her voice was getting louder and stronger… and more hysterical.

"Ana, calm down," I tried to comfort her. At the same moment, a nurse came through the door.

"Why didn't you page us when she woke up?" she asked me with an irritated tone. Oh no, missy. Don't take that tone with me!

I ignored her attitude and told her, "She's only been awake for a few minutes. She remembers… everything."

"You need to stay calm, ma'am," the nurse told her.

"Don't call me fucking ma'am," Ana snapped. Holy shit, that wasn't like her. Sure, she hated to be called ma'am, but she usually didn't snap at staff like that.

"She's in pain," I told the nurse. "Can you give her something for it?"

"She just had a major trauma, followed by major surgery. Of course she's in pain," the nurse answered snippily.

"Will you just shut the fuck up and get out!" Ana ordered the nurse. She sounded more like me than herself, but I knew it was because she was hurting and frustrated.

Wisely, the nurse didn't say another word. She quietly gave Ana some meds through the IV, checked her vitals, and left the room as soon as she'd recorded them.

Ana looked remorseful, and silent tears fell from her eyes again. "I was a bitch," she said.

"Ana, you're in pain, and you're worried about Ismintis. But don't be, OK? I promise, I'll take care of everything for you."

"Christian, you can't," she answered groggily. Damn, that medication works fast. "You're GEH. You can't handle Ismintis, too."

"I can, and I will. For you. We're going to be married, sweetheart. GEH is going to be half yours. In the meantime, I'll make sure everything keeps running like the well-oiled machine that it is at Ismintis. You have a lot of loyal employees. I'll make sure that your executive staff keep things going, business as usual. I'll make sure the deals you're working on go through for you. It will be OK. I promise."

I'm not sure she heard me, because she was asleep, as was evidenced by her deep breathing. Even though it was still the middle of the night, I immediately called Ros and gave her instructions.


	39. Chapter 39: Not the Same Ana (CPOV)

**Chapter 39: Not the Same Ana (CPOV)**

"Christian..." Ros tentatively said. "Look... I get that you want to help your fiancee. But... we can't just stop running GEH so we can make sure Ismintis International is running well without her."

"I'm not suggesting that, Ros," I objected. "We can do both. Ana has a very competent staff who just need a little oversight to make sure they're doing what she'd want them to do. I'd do it myself if I could, but I really need to be here at the hospital with Ana. So I just need you to communicate with them and me to make sure everything is on par. I don't want Ana worrying about what's happening at Ismintis."

"Christian..." Ros said again. "Are we...? Look, I'm not sure you realize how this looks? So I'm just laying it out there? Is GEH taking over Ismintis?"

"No!" I answered adamantly. "This is NOT a takeover. We are not even merging, much less taking them over. Ismintis is Ana's company. I'm going to marry her, not her company."

"Right. It's just that... You've already put Ana as half owner of GEH, effective the day you marry her. I assume that she's doing the same for you. Marriage does go both ways, after all. And if you're both co-owners of each other's companies..."

"We haven't discussed it," I told Ros, cutting her off. "Ana doesn't know that I've made her half owner of GEH. I was planning to have that conversation with her this weekend. We were planning to go sailing. Anyway, I seriously doubt she's thought about anything like that for me at Ismintis. She's been a little... preoccupied. Her focus has been on replacing her COO."

"I realize that," Ros replied.

"Look... the last thing I want to happen is for Ana to encounter any... surprises... when she is finally able to go back to work. She's going to be out for a few weeks, and she was doing overtime as it was. I want you to find out who at Ismintis is able to step up and take on more duties until Ana is able to handle things again herself."

Ros sighed. "Look... the only way this is going to work is if Ana agrees to it and you both find a way to communicate that to her staff. They're going to have to hear it FROM HER that she wants me to step in temporarily. Imagine if Ana or somebody that works for her contacted me without me knowing that you'd made her co-owner, and she started telling me how to do my job. Do you really think I'd listen to her?"

"Ros, she isn't able to..."

"Just talk to her, Christian," Ros insisted. "You can compose an email yourself. From Ana to her executive staff. I've done that for you plenty of times, but you always read it thoroughly, agreed to it, and sent it yourself. Hell, you can even push the send key for her. But she needs to be on board. Otherwise, you're not going to get anywhere with her staff."

I realized the wisdom of my COO. She was right, of course. Ana's staff weren't going to take any orders from anyone from GEH, including me, without a direct command from Ana. After I ended the call with Ros, I knew sleep was out of the question for me. Instead, I opened my laptop and composed a letter from Ana to her staff. When she awakened... hopefully not until morning... if she seemed up to it, then I would discuss it with her. I wouldn't act without her consent. Even if I tried to, Ros was right, her staff wouldn't take it well.

The next morning, Taylor arrived a couple of hours earlier than I'd expected him. The sun wasn't even up yet. He slipped quietly into the room, but when I saw the look on his face, I realized that he was livid. Shit! What now?

I motioned for him to follow me out the door because I didn't want to disturb Ana. "What is it?" I asked him as we stood in the empty hallway with Prescott still standing guard.

Taylor kept his voice low, and he motioned for me to follow him, so we started walking towards the elevator, and eventually down to the cafeteria for coffee. "Apparently, Ms. Williams wasn't the only one who called 911. Samantha Gilbert also did. To report the physical assault... which then progressed into rape during the call."

"Samantha...? Taylor, what the hell are you talking about?" I asked confusedly.

Taylor spit his reply. "The son of a bitch was live-streaming the video of him assaulting Ms. Steele."

His words horrified me. I couldn't find any words to respond... or to even process what he'd just told me. What the fucking hell...?

Taylor continued, "As you know... Barney and Samantha were tracking Hyde's online activity. Since it was the weekend, Barney wasn't working, so he was unaware. Samantha apparently was online, and she got a hit. She watched the attack, from the beginning. She recognized Ms. Steele and Mr. Hyde. When he began to assault her, Samantha called 911 to report it. But she claims that it took her some time to convince the dispatcher that the crime was actually in progress. By that time, the bastard was raping..."

I interrupted Taylor. "And all of this was being live-streamed?" I asked frantically. Shit!Ana would be even more devastated than she already was when she learned this latest news.

Taylor nodded gravely. "Samantha said she tried to shut it down. But it took her too long to hack into Hyde's site, so she thinks that most of it was live. She was able to shut it down afterwards, so the video isn't online now. But... according to her, there's no way to know how many people watched it while he was streaming it."

"Shit!" I exclaimed.

Taylor continued, "Samantha witnessed the entire assault, including Hyde getting shot, although the shooter was off camera. She even saw us when we arrived, and the police and paramedics. She gave a full report to the police. I was not notified about this until late last night."

"Why the hell didn't she notify you before last night?" I asked angrily.

"She doesn't work for you, sir," Taylor reminded me. "She actually called me to get an update on Ms. Steele because she didn't want to bother you, and she said she was worried about her. She told me what happened and how the police acted."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"They didn't believe her at first. They thought it was a hoax. If they had listened to her, they might have prevented the rape."

"If they had responded to the silent alarm, then they might have prevented it as well," I reminded him.

Taylor looked angry again. "Yeah... about that," he said. "Apparently, Seattle's best did respond. An Escala security guard assured them that he had spoken with your private security and that everything was fine. He lied."

"Hyde paid off Escala's security," I realized.

"That is how it appears," Taylor agreed. "I spoke with the head of security at Escala, and he's looking into it."

We bought our coffee and headed back towards Ana's room. "I want to talk with Samantha Gilbert," I told Taylor.

"You want her to call you or stop by?" Taylor clarified.

"Tell her to pay us a visit," I answered. "If she's worried about Ana, which I don't doubt, then she can check on her in person. And then have a conversation with me."

Taylor was scheduled to relieve Prescott in another hour or so, and he suggested that she take off a little early since she'd been standing guard outside Ana's room all night. He stayed outside the door when I reentered Ana's room. Damn it all if she weren't awake and trying to get out of the bed.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I asked her, more harshly than I'd intended.

"I woke up, and you weren't here," Ana said accusingly. "And... I need to pee!" She sounded desperate as she said that last part.

"Ana..." I spoke as calmly as I could. "You have a catheter, sweetheart. You don't need to pee."

She blew out a huff of frustration and rolled her eyes. "I think I know when I have to pee," she told me angrily.

"Listen...OK... Let me call a nurse." I pushed the button to page the nurse. "She can remove the catheter, and then you can use the facilities."

Ana sighed. "I'm sorry," she whispered, and I was dismayed to see tears in her eyes. "I'm being a bitch again."

"You're not a bitch," I insisted. "You're in pain."

"I am," she agreed. "Everything hurts. Even my hair hurts."

I looked at her head, at the goose egg, which looked better than it had last night. "Yeah well, you took a nasty hit to your head, so I'm not surprised that your head hurts. The nurse can give you more meds."

"That will just make me sleep more. I'm tired of sleeping," she whined.

At that moment, the nurse entered. It was a different one than the snippy bitty from last night. "How are you feeling this morning, Ms. Steele?" she asked.

"Like I've been attacked by wild dogs and run over by a steam roller," Ana answered. "And I need to pee. Can you get this thing out of me?"

The nurse nodded sympathetically. "I can, but then you'll have to either get out of bed or use a bedpan every time you need to use the restroom. Are you sure that's what you want?"

"Yes, I'm sure," Ana insisted. "I want to get out of this bed."

"OK, then," the nurse replied. "If you feel up to it, getting up and moving around is actually good for you. It helps the circulation in your legs. It will only take a minute for me to remove your catheter. Would you like to wait outside, sir?" she instructed me.

"No!" Ana shouted. "I want him to stay! Don't go, Christian!"

"I'm here, princess," I reassured her. "I'm not going anywhere."

Ana relaxed, and the nurse took only a few minutes to remove the catheter.

"How's the headache?" the nurse asked Ana. "Would you like something for it?"

"I'm tired of sleeping," Ana said. "I want to stay awake for a while. Can I tell you when I can't bear it anymore?"

The nurse gave her a disapproving look. "You'll heal better if you aren't in so much pain. And sleeping is good for you right now. But for now, I can give you some pain medication that won't make you drowsy."

Ana sighed. "OK... just... I want to stay awake for a while. I'm sure I'll need a nap... later."

"That's fine," the nurse agreed. "Now... let me help you to the bathroom, and then I'll go get your meds."

"I can do that," I offered.

"It's OK," she replied. "That's my job."

"But I want to," I insisted.

Ana ignored both of us and sat up on the edge of the bed. "I can do it myself," she announced.

"No," both the nurse and I said at the same time.

Ana looked at both of us angrily. But she bit her tongue to stop her from saying what I could see she really wanted to say and instead said, "OK, then, he helps me." She pointed at me, then looked at the nurse, reading her name tag. "Kara, I know I'm not your only patient. Hopefully, the others are not as irritable as I am. Can you leave me for a few minutes while Christian helps me, and then come back with the pain medicine? I promise, I'll do whatever else I'm supposed to do."

Nurse Kara smiled at Ana. "You have every right to be irritable, honey. Don't you worry about that. I'll see you in a few minutes." Nurse Kara looked at me and said, "Don't hesitate to call me if you need me." With that, she walked out the door, and I wondered why every nurse couldn't be like Nurse Kara.

When the nurse left, Ana sighed and told me, "I think I managed not to be too big of a bitch to her."

"You did," I agreed.

"I still need to pee," she said, and she started to stand. I put my arms around her as gently as possible and started to carry her. "Christian, I can walk!" she insisted.

I decided not to fight her, so instead of insisting on carrying her into the bathroom, I took her by the arm and assisted her as she walked slowly to the bathroom. She was wobbly, but she made it there on her own two feet.

When we got to the toilet, I helped her sit, making sure the hospital gown was out of her way.

"OK, you can go now," she told me.

"No, I can't," I disagreed.

"Christian... I can't pee when you're standing right there," she insisted.

"Why the hell not?" I asked.

She blew out a breath of frustration. "Will you just... leave me alone for a couple of minutes. I need some privacy."

I didn't want to leave her for even a second. What if she fell? "Ana... we're going to be married. We already live together. We've seen each other's private parts up close and personal. I think we can take a piss in front of each other."

"Christian, that's so gross," she insisted. "But if you want to be crude, I can be crude too. I like to take my pisses... and shits... in privacy. Not that I need to shit now, just piss. There, is that personal enough for you?"

Once again, I decided not to fight her, or even to respond to her ranting. "Two minutes, and then I'm coming in," I warned her. I stood just outside the door and listened carefully so if she fell, I'd hear her. Before two minutes had passed, I heard the toilet flush and the water running at the sink. I opened the door to check on her.

"That wasn't two minutes," she complained.

"You were finished," I pointed out.

"Yeah, I was," she agreed. She didn't argue when I took her by the arm and helped her back to bed. Once she was back in bed, she looked up at me and sighed. She looked miserable. "You're never going to look at me the same way again, are you?" she asked sadly.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

She didn't answer immediately, but she studied my face, and I felt exposed, as if she could see directly into my heart. "You watched the video footage," she accused me.

I felt a jolt of shock. "No, I didn't," I objected. I didn't want to talk about the video, and I sure as hell wasn't going to tell her about the live stream, at least not yet. "I promised you I wouldn't watch it, and I keep my promises, Ana. I haven't seen it, and I won't."

Tears filled her eyes again. Damn it! Was my tone too harsh? I'd never been a gentle man. But Ana needed gentle right now.

"OK," she whispered. "But... you know what happened. I can see that you know. If you didn't watch it, then how do you know?"

I didn't pretend not to understand what she was asking me. I knew what she wanted to know, but I clarified just to be sure. "Are you asking me how I know what that monster did to you?"

She nodded and closed her eyes. The tears were falling now.

I wiped her tears gently and kissed her eyelids before I answered her. "I know what he did because I found you in my playroom moments after Leila shot him. I saw your stab wounds. And then, I was in the ambulance with you when the paramedics were examining you and trying to stop your bleeding. They mentioned... that you were... sexually assaulted." I swallowed and tried to choke back my own damn tears.

Ana opened her eyes and stared into mine. "How can you possibly feel the same way about me after this? I can see it, Christian. You look... guilty. I'm sure it's because your feelings have changed. But don't... I get it, OK. I'm not the same Ana. You don't have to... pretend. You don't need to try to force yourself to feel what you felt before..."

I couldn't listen to any more of her foolishness. I got in her face and told her passionately but as gently as I could, without raising my voice, "Ana, my love, stop it. Just stop it now. For one thing, you only just woke up, so how the hell do you know what I'm feeling already, when your eyes have only been open for a few minutes? But never mind about that. Listen to me, and read my lips, and don't forget or doubt what I'm telling you. I LOVE YOU! With all that is in me, I love you, woman! More than I ever dreamed I was even capable of loving anyone. More now than ever! You need to believe me when I tell you that my love for you has not gotten weaker, it's only gotten stronger. And you also need to believe me when I tell you that you're going to get through this. You're a fighter! But you're right about what you see in my eyes, my beautiful, observant, brilliant girl. I do feel guilty, but not for the reason you think."

She was listening intently to my every word. "Why, then?" she asked.

Damn it, I hated telling her this, but it was the God's honest truth, and I couldn't get around it. "Ana... everything that you've suffered is MY FAULT!"

I could see that she believed my explanation about why I felt guilty, that it wasn't because my feelings for her had changed, but she looked confused. "Why do you think it was your fault?" she asked.

"Because it WAS!" I insisted. "The rat bastard sought you out because he had some kind of personal vendetta against me, for some insane reason. The only reason he even took a job with you two years ago was to get to me."

Ana nodded. "Insane is correct. He thought you stole his family from him when you were only four years old. There's no way you could have known or prevented what happened. It's not your fault, Christian."

"I'm so sorry, Anastasia," I told her anyway, no longer able to hold back my tears.

In spite of her own tears still falling, she reached up and wiped mine away like I had done hers moments earlier. "It's not your fault," she repeated, with conviction.

I sat on the edge of her bed, and she sat up and leaned her head on my shoulder. I gently put my arms around her, and we held each other like that until Nurse Kara returned with Ana's pain meds, which she administered through the IV.

When the nurse had finished and left us alone again, Ana looked at me sadly and announced, "Hyde killed Luke. And Leila's nurse."

Once again, part of me wished that Ana had amnesia, or at least that she was too out of it to think about all that had happened. But at least I could set her mind at ease on one account.

"Luke Sawyer isn't dead," I told her. "At least, he wasn't last night."

She looked at me with hope. "Really?"

I nodded. "He was shot in the head, but he survived. He was still in a medically induced coma last I heard, but they were going to bring him out of it, so he might have woken up by now. I'll ask Taylor to find out." I shot off a text to Taylor.

Instead of responding, Taylor knocked on the door and entered. I'd almost forgotten that he was standing guard. "Sawyer is out of the coma. He woke up early this morning."

"Oh, thank God," Ana sighed.

"Ms. Steele, I'm happy to see that you're awake," Taylor told her.

"I feel like shit," Ana told him. "God, I have no filter. Is it the drugs?"

I smiled at her and said, "You don't need a filter. I'm glad you're alert enough to know you feel like shit. You're going to get through this, babe."

Ana sighed. "I used to hate being called 'babe.' But I like it coming from you."

My smile widened. "I'll add it to the list, then."

Ana ignored me. She looked at Taylor and asked, "How is Luke?"

"Not sure yet," Taylor answered honestly. "All I know is he woke up. I will let you know when I find out more."

Just then, the door swung open, and Taylor reached for his gun reflexively.

"Woah! Easy there, big guy," Kate called out nervously.

"You should knock," I told her, relieved that they had not been a security threat, and that Taylor's gun was back in its holster. He went back outside to stand guard as Kate and Elliot walked into the room with bags of bagels, and more coffee.

"Wow, you look like shit," Elliot told me with his usual grace.

"Fuck you," I responded with no malice.

He looked at me with concern and asked, "Did you sleep...?"

I didn't get a chance to answer, thankfully. The last thing I wanted was for Ana to start feeling bad because I hadn't gotten any sleep.

Kate cut Elliot off, crying out excitedly, "You're awake!" She looked at Ana like she was going to start crying again. I remembered... somewhere it had registered in my brain the previous day. Kate had been crying a lot.

Ana nodded weakly, "I am," she agreed. She turned to Elliot and asked, "Do I look like shit too?" She was trying to be funny... and strong for her friend. My beautiful, amazing girl, who had been to hell and back, was still thinking of others first.

Kate hugged Ana too tightly, while Elliot answered, "You look beautiful, Ana Banana."

"Liar," Ana snapped. She was wincing when she said to Kate, "Not so tightly."

Kate stood back and looked at Ana sorrowfully. "I'm sorry. I'm just so glad you're OK. I thought... oh, shit, Ana, you're my best friend. My sister from another mister. I've never been so happy to see anyone in my life."

Ana nodded again. "I know," she whispered.

"We brought bagels," Elliot announced. I was starving, but I felt bad for Ana. She wouldn't be able to eat anything until the doctors cleared her for solid food, which probably wouldn't be for another day or two from what they'd said after her surgery.

"Are you able to eat?" Kate asked Ana.

Ana shook her head and answered, "I'm not hungry. I don't feel like eating anything."

"But you need to eat, Ana," Kate objected.

Ana sighed tiredly, and I jumped into her rescue. I wanted her to eat too, more than anyone there, but I knew she couldn't yet. "She can't," I told them. "Not yet anyway. She had major surgery on her liver, among other major organs. The doctors haven't cleared her yet. She has to stick with liquids for now."

"I'm not hungry anyway," Ana shrugged.

"They said you wouldn't be for a while," I told her.

"What else did they tell you?" she asked curiously. It dawned on me that Ana had not talked yet with a doctor, and she probably had a lot of questions.

I decided that what she needed at the moment from me was reassurance. The doctors would be in soon to check on her and give her an update. "That you're going to be just fine," I told her.

She raised her eyebrows, "Just fine?" she asked. She blew out a breath of frustration and shook her head. "Right," she muttered. She clearly didn't believe me.

"Yes, my amazing girl," I insisted. "You're strong. The strongest person I know. You are going to be OK."

Ana didn't respond. She simply looked at me sadly. "Christian... would you mind if I spend some time with Kate? Would you and Elliot take your bagels... somewhere? Just for a few minutes?"

I felt hurt, but I tried not to show it. "Sure," I answered. "While I'm at it, I'll go see if I can find out anything about Sawyer."

"I'd really appreciate that," Ana responded tiredly. "Thank you, Christian."

"Of course, princess," I responded with a gentle smile. I kissed her gently on the forehead and told her I loved her before I left her alone with Kate.

I gave a bagel to Taylor, and we'd left one for Kate. We took the bag with the rest of them with us, but before we stopped to eat them, I wanted to find out about Sawyer. Taylor had told me which hospital room he was in, so we went there first.

Sawyer was awake when we entered his room, but he didn't seem to recognize me. I had a short conversation with him, and he was able to talk, but he seemed confused the whole time. When I told him that Ana was OK, he didn't seem to comprehend. It dawned on me... I'd hoped Ana wouldn't remember, but it looked like Sawyer was the one who had amnesia. He had brain damage from being shot. Was it permanent? Would he recover? Those answers weren't coming anytime soon. Ana would be crushed.

We left Sawyer's room and walked outside to the rooftop garden. The weather was a little nippy and overcast, but at least it wasn't raining, and we both had jackets. The fresh air was a good change. Elliot and I unwrapped our bagels and started eating.

After a few moments of companionable silence as we ate, Elliot started talking. "So... there's something I want to ask you... and tell you." He sounded nervous, which was odd.

"What is it?" I asked curiously.

"I'm a little late in asking you this, and now, with what's happened to Ana... Kate and I are worried about the timing. I should have asked you last week, but I got distracted with work and shit. Anyway, here it is. I want you to be the best man in my wedding."

"Is that all, Elliot? Of course I'll be your best man. I want you to be mine too."

"I'd love to. But here's the thing... with ours. It's going to be in Fiji. Thanksgiving. You're going to have to take off work. And Kate wants Ana to be the maid of honor. She already agreed. They talked about it last week."

I smiled for Elliot's benefit, but I felt worried. Not for the reason Elliot might be worried though. "Elliot... Ana already told me, and she already had her PA call mine with the dates. It's booked on my calendar already. It's a good thing I didn't already have a business trip scheduled, considering it's just a month away."

"Less than that," Elliot replied. He still looked worried. "But... will Ana be able to go?"

I sighed. "I hope so," I answered frankly. "Under normal circumstances, Ana wouldn't miss her best friend's wedding for any reason. But she has a long road ahead of her, and Kate has to understand that Ana isn't going to be able to to all the normal pre-wedding shit, whatever that is. If everything goes well, I think she'll have enough time to recover from her injuries enough to travel, but she's still going to have..." I paused, and sighed. My poor Ana. "She'll still have scars. The wounds won't have had time to heal completely. And she might not be up for an all night wedding reception. She'll probably still be on medication, so she won't be able to drink. And I won't be able to keep her on the dance floor all night like I normally would. But... as long we we keep her healing in mind, Fiji could be good for her."

"Kate's decided to postpone our collaring ceremony," Elliot announced. Shit, I'd forgotten.

"When was that supposed to be... next week?" I asked.

Elliot answered, "Yeah, and she knew there was no way Ana could be there, so she decided we could do it closer to our wedding date."

I sighed again. Would Elliot understand? "El... I'm not sure if Ana will ever..." I stopped and swallowed hard. "Honestly, I'm not sure if I will ever be able to go near... that... again. And Ana... He brutalized her, El... She's been through hell, and I'm not sure how being in... that kind of environment... will affect her."

"You think she's not going to want to go near a BDSM event? Even our collaring?" Elliot asked. He sounded disappointed.

"I don't know, El," I replied honestly. "I sure as hell don't want to push her. I don't know exactly what happened... but I know that the bastard raped her, and it happened in my playroom. From the wounds on her body, it's obvious that he flogged her, and I'm not sure what else, besides the rape." I stopped and took a deep breath before I continued. "When I got home, I heard a gunshot coming from upstairs. I got there moments after the son of a bitch was shot, and Ana was... I thought she was... dead. And when I saw her..." My voice broke, and I felt my eyes stinging with tears. "She was hanging from my Saint Andrews Cross, bleeding to death. She had to have a blood transfusion. I can't..." I paused again, realizing the truth of what I was about to say. "I will never look at a Saint Andrews Cross again the same way. It used to be one of my favorite pieces in my playroom. Now... I hate it."

"Holy shit," Elliot whispered.

"Listen, bro," I began, but I had to pause again to collect my thoughts. "I know how important it is to you. The collaring, I mean. All I can say is... I'll try. But I don't know if I can handle it, honestly. And I sure as hell am not going to ask Ana to attend. I can't, Elliot."

"I get it," Elliot assured me. "We'll figure something out."


	40. Chapter 40: A Day of Tears (APOV)

**Chapter 40: A Day of Tears (Anastasia's POV)**

"He raped me." I blurted it out just like that. Kate and I had been staring at one another since Christian and Elliot had walked out the door a few moments earlier, neither of us knowing what to say first, and I picked one hell of an opener.

"No!" Kate cried. "God damn mother fucking sack of pig shit! I'll fucking kill him!"

"He's already dead," I responded tiredly.

"I hope he fucking rots in hell, the mother fucking son of a bitch!" she spit.

I sighed and responded dispassionately, "Yeah... if there is a hell, I'm sure he's there." I was still trying at this point to be strong for my friend, but I didn't know how long I could keep it up.

Kate was angrier than I'd ever seen her. "Damn it! When we were in the ER, waiting... I kept hoping... We didn't know exactly what he'd done, other than almost killing you. What he did... attacking you with that knife... that was horrible enough. I'd hoped he didn't... God! Shit!" Kate had tears in her eyes, and it gave me the freedom I needed to let my own tears fall.

"I thought he was going to kill me," I confessed. "He was going to slit my throat."

"Holy shit!" Kate cried. "God, Ana! What a fucking monster! Was he insane?"

"Obviously," I answered. "He blamed Christian for something that happened when Christian was only a toddler. He thought the Greys should have adopted him instead of Christian. He's spent his entire life hating Christian for something that was out of Christian's control. Yes, I'd say that's certifiably insane. How the hell I worked so closely with him for two fucking years without ever realizing how batshit crazy he was is beyond me. Here I prided myself on being a good judge of character, but I didn't have a fucking clue about him."

"Holy shit!" Kate repeated. "So... you're saying he attacked you... he brutalized you... just to get to Cristian? It had nothing to do with you firing his ass?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying," I affirmed. "He only worked for me to get to Christian. And the attack on me... it was all about Christian. Hurting me to hurt Christian. He had all these video cameras set up. I don't even know how many. He was talking to the camera as if he were talking to Christian. I think in his mind, Christian was watching."

"He videoed your attack?" Kate asked incredulously. "He had no intention of getting away with it. What... was he going to kill himself after he... " Kate slapped her hand over her mouth.

"You can say it, Kate," I told her. "I already told you. He was going to kill me. I don't know what his plan was after that. I don't know if he thought Christian was going to show up, and he'd planned to kill him too. I don't know. I really don't want to try to figure it out. I need to figure myself out more than any of that shit."

"God, Ana. I'm so sorry! I'm such an insensitive bitch sometimes. But I love you, and I'm so sorry this happened to you." Kate was sobbing just as much as I was.

I wiped my eyes and responded, "Me too, Kate."

"What can I do, Ana?" Kate asked.

I sighed. What could she do? "Listen to me?" I responded more as a question than an answer. "I haven't had a moment away from Christian since I woke up. And... I feel... confused." With that confession, my sniffling tears turned into all out boohooing.

"Shhh... It's going to be OK, Ana. You're strong. You're going to get through this," Kate consoled.

"That's exactly what Christian keeps saying," I told her. "But am I? I don't even know who the hell I am anymore. That son of a bitch took a piece of me, and I don't know how the fuck to get it back!"

"That's it, Ana. Be angry. Be fucking angry," Kate encouraged me through her own tears.

"I don't have enough energy to be fucking angry!" I screamed. Then I fell back on the pillow and squeezed my eyes shut. I felt Kate sit down on the bed. She took my hand and began to rub it.

Kate didn't say anything at first. After a few moments, she said, "You're going to get your energy back, Ana. You're going to heal from the physical wounds. But it's going to take longer to get through the invisible ones. That's why I'm saying to be angry. You should be. It's normal."

"Nothing about this is normal," I argued.

"You're going to need professional help," Kate said.

"No shit," I responded. "But I haven't even talked to a fucking doctor yet about my apparently serious surgery on several vital organs. I'm supposedly in critical condition. Christian knows more about my health than I do right now. So of course I haven't had a chance to talk to a shrink yet."

"Do you want to talk to me?" Kate asked. "I mean... are you ready to talk in more detail about what happened yet?"

I had to think about that for a minute. I didn't think I could talk about any of the sordid details. But I might feel better after talking generally about it, just to get it out.

"He knocked me out, and I woke up in Christian's playroom. Naked. Bound to the spanking bench. That's where he did it. But first, he beat the hell out of me. It wasn't anything like BDSM, at least not how I've experienced it. He only had one purpose: to hurt me."

"Oh holy fucking shit," Kate responded. "God, Ana!"

"Kate... I'm so scared now. Christian hasn't left my side. He's assured me that his feelings for me haven't changed. But... will he really still want me after this?"

"Oh, Ana, of course he will!" Kate insisted.

"But... he's a Dom, Kate. And... I really don't know if I can... God, it's so ironic, looking back. I know we haven't been together very long, but it feels like it. When we first met... at the munch that night... I was so excited about being restrained. I loved it." I choked out the next few words through sobs. "But, now...how... can I... do... that... and... how... can... he... want... me... if... I... can't?"

Kate rubbed my hand comfortingly. "Ana," she said after a moment of thought, "Doms and subs come in many different shapes and sizes. Christian loves you. He's not going to insist on anything that you can't handle. He's your Dom, sweetheart. It's his job to protect you and meet your needs. Your job is simply to let him, not to worry about any of the shit you're worried about right now."

"But Kate," I insisted, "what if I can't ever do any of that shit again?"

Kate didn't respond with the shock that I expected her to. She seemed to be pondering my question. Finally, she said, "I can't speak definitively for Christian... but I don't have any doubt in my mind that he loves you, so I think he would probably say the same thing. If something like this happened to Elliot, and if he were never able, as a result, to go near BDSM, then it would be a no-brainer for me. Elliot is my soulmate. I'd give up being a Domme for him any day. I'd be OK with a vanilla relationship with him. He's worth giving it up for. And so are you, Ana. You and Christian are going to be OK."

I couldn't stop crying, and I stuttered again through my tears, "I... hope... so..."

We were both quiet for a few minutes, and Kate probably thought I had fallen asleep. She probably didn't intend for me to hear her when she said, "I sure do hope you're able to make it to my wedding, sweet Ana."

I didn't open my eyes, but I answered her. "I wouldn't miss your wedding for any reason in the world, Kate. I'll be there."

I heard Kate sigh. "Ana, if you aren't well enough to travel..."

"I'll be well enough to travel," I cut her off. I opened my eyes and added, "Have you seen my new jet? I've only used it once, and it was the smoothest plane ride I've ever had. I have a bedroom with a very comfortable bed. Even a bath tub. So getting to Fiji isn't going to be a problem. I'll be there Kate. I just... might not be wearing any bikinis while we're there." I sighed and closed my eyes again.

"Thanks, Ana," Kate replied.

I didn't open my eyes as I added, "I won't be able to make it to your collaring ceremony though. I hope you understand."

I heard Kate draw in a quick breath. "Ana... of course not! Holy shit! After what you've just... No, neither you nor Christian will be at our collaring."

I opened my eyes and looked at her. "Christian can go," I told her.

She looked at me like I'd grown an extra head. "No, he can't."

"Why not?" I asked. Christian didn't need me with him to attend his brother's collaring ceremony. I knew he'd want to be there for Elliot.

"Ana..." Kate began, but I could tell she wasn't sure how to say what she wanted to. "Christian..." She stopped and shook her head.

"Just say it, Kate," I told her.

Kate sighed, hesitated, but finally answered, "He found you, Ana. I knew that from what he said in the ER waiting room. He didn't say much, but we knew that he'd found you. We didn't know it was in... his playroom. He was... in shock. Ana... what happened to you... it traumatized Christian too. He can't go to our collaring."

I finally understood what Kate was saying, and I felt even worse. My poor Christian. I couldn't respond to Kate, so I just nodded my head and closed my eyes. I just couldn't stop the tears.

Kate continued to console me, even though she was still sobbing too. "You and Christian are both going to need counseling, but you're going to be OK."

I opened my eyes and screamed, "I wish everybody would quit fucking telling me I'm going to be OK!" I instantly regretted my outburst. "I'm sorry, Kate!" I whispered.

"God, Ana!" she cried. "Don't apologize. You have permission to scream at me. I get it, OK?"

"No... you can't get it. I can't even fucking get it myself! Do you know... I don't even give a fuck about what's happening at Ismintis right now. It's my company, Kate, and thousands of employees are dependent on me... and I just don't give a rat's ass at this moment. What the hell is wrong with me?"

"Ana... you've got to give yourself time..." Kate said.

"No! It gets worse!" I insisted. "Christina! Leila is dead now, and I promised her! God! She lived long enough to save my life, and now she's dead, and I promised her that I would be Christina's mother. I promised her that I'd love that baby just as if I'd given birth to her myself. The adoption isn't final yet, but I promised." I began to choke out my words again, unable to control myself, "I... haven't... even... thought... about... my... baby... until... now. What... kind... of... fucking... mother... am... I?"

Kate leaned closer to me, and I put my head on her shoulder, and we held each other as we both cried. She didn't try to answer me. She just let me cry, and she cried with me. I'm not sure how long I wept before I heard my dad's voice at the door.

"What did that son of a bitch do to you now?!" Dad yelled angrily.

I looked up at him in shock. "He's dead," I told him through my tears, which I tried to wipe away. I felt confused. Didn't Dad know that Jack Hyde was dead? He was dead, wasn't he? Christian had assured me. And then, it dawned on me.

"You were asking about Jack Hyde, weren't you, Dad? I know you must know better than to think..." When I saw the guilty look on his face, I accused him. "You were asking about Christian, weren't you?"

Ray's face turned red, either in embarrassment or in anger... I was too bumfuzzled to figure out which. "I'm sorry, Annie," he answered meekly. "I thought he..." He shook his head and tried to explain. "When he first called me to tell me about your..." Ray had to stop and clear his throat. "I thought it was him at first. I know it doesn't make sense that he'd call me if he'd done it. But I couldn't get what you'd told me about... that shit you do with him... and what he'd done to that poor girl in that video... I just couldn't get it out of my head."

"You watched the video of him and Leila?" I asked him incredulously.

He nodded. "I wanted to see for myself, and I was horrified that he was doing that shit to you."

"He wasn't, Dad. I told you that already. And even if he were, it would have been consensual. But what happened to me... what Jack Hyde did to me... I can't believe you would even imagine that Christian could do such a thing. Dad, he almost killed me. He raped me and stabbed me, and he was going to kill me. Do you really think I would be in love with a man who could do something like that?" My voice was getting higher pitched the more I spoke, and I felt my face getting hotter."

Kate had been silent until now, but she took my face between her hands and said firmly, "Calm down!" Then she rubbed my hand comfortingly as she looked at Ray and said calmly, "You have a whole hell of a lot to learn, Raymond Steele, about alternative lifestyles. Not everything is about abuse. And you have a whole hell of a lot to learn about your daughter and her choices in life. You've made some major ass assumptions about Christian Grey, and you are dead wrong. You think he introduced Ana to BDSM so he could abuse her? Bullshit! I introduced Ana to BDSM, and it was long before she met Christian."

"You're into this shit too?" Ray asked her incredulously. He wasn't angry, just confused. "You let some guy beat you too?"

Just then, Christian and Elliot returned. Christian got one look at my face and demanded, "What the hell is going on in here? Why are you so upset?"

Kate answered, "I was just explaining to Ray here a few truths about BDSM. And to answer your question, Ray, no, I don't let some guy beat me. I beat him sometimes, and he likes it. Isn't that right, Elliot?" She got off the bed and embraced Elliot, who responded by kissing her tenderly.

"Yes, Mistress," Elliot whispered loud enough for everyone in the room to hear him.

"Holy shit!" Ray said. "I feel like I've entered the twilight zone."

I sighed tiredly. "I'm tired, and I don't really give a shit what you think about our lifestyle right now, Dad. But if you're going to believe horrible things about Christian, then you can leave. I don't want you here if you're going to be hateful to him."

"Annie, I don't mean to be hateful to him," Ray responded. "I'm sorry. Really, I am. It's just... I'm trying to make sense of all this. Everybody here seems to think that the sun rises and sets in his a... ummm... I'm sorry. I just don't know what to believe."

"Dad... I really don't have the energy to discuss this with you anymore. Can you just go, please? Come back when you're willing to give Christian a chance."

"I'm already ready to give him a chance," Ray insisted. He turned to Christian and held out his hand. "I'm sorry," he told him.

Christian looked at Ray's hand suspiciously, but he took it and shook it. "Apology accepted," Christian responded. His body language clearly said that he would wait and see how sincere Ray's apology really was.

Ray turned back to me and held my hand for a moment as he said, "I'll leave you to rest for now, Annie, but I mean it when I say that I am sorry for offending you... " He glanced at Christian as he added, "and Christian. I... I'll try to be more... open minded. I love you, baby girl."

"I love you, too, Dad," I responded tiredly. I could feel the need for sleep taking over.

As Dad was walking out of the room, a team of doctors was walking in, so I had to perk up so I could finally find out what the fuck was going on with my health. I was horrified to find out just how close to death I had come. Apparently, I'd almost bled to death because of the stab wound that damaged my colon. As a result of all the damage to my digestive system, I'd be on a liquid diet for a few more days, before they started introducing solid food slowly. They downgraded me, or upgraded me, I was confused about which, from critical to serious condition, a sign that I was improving. They predicted that I'd be released from the hospital in a few days, but only after they had made sure I could handle solid foods, and that my wounds were healing properly. They said that I would need to be off work for at least six weeks to fully recover. Six weeks away from Ismintis. How would it ever survive without me, or a second in command? They also told me that I wouldn't be able to lift anything heavier than five pounds for the next six weeks. That included Christina. Damn it! How could I ever be a mother to her?

Once the doctors had left, as well as Kate and Elliot, I asked Christian, "Where is Christina?"

"Mom and Mia are taking turns taking care of her. She's fine. Mrs. Jones has even pitched in. She's not exactly needed for housekeeping these days, so she asked if she could help."

I nodded. "I was worried," I admitted. But now, with his assurance, I felt myself relaxing again. I really needed sleep.

"Don't be," Christian assured me. "Christina is fine. I do want to talk with you about Ismintis International, but only after you've had a nap."

"How is it ever going to survive, Christian?" I asked worriedly. "Thousands of employees dependent on me, and I can't be there for six weeks."

"I'll take care of you, baby," he assured me. "Now, sleep. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. We can talk about it when you wake up."

I didn't have a choice because my body wouldn't have listened to me even if I had tried to stay awake. I'm not sure how long I slept, but true to his word, Christian was seated at my side, working on his laptop, when I opened my eyes again.

"Hi," I said hoarsely to get his attention. I needed water.

Christian immediately put down his laptop and got the cup of water from the bedside table. He held the straw for me and reminded me, "Small sips."

I took a few sips before I asked him, "Are you able to get much work done while you're sitting here wth me?"

"You'd be surprised," he responded. But he apparently didn't want to talk about work. "How do you feel, princess?"

"Like I've been beaten, raped, and almost stabbed to death," I answered humorlessly. When I saw the grimace on his face, I regretted being so blunt.

"Do you need more pain meds?" he asked.

I shook my head, and then regretted that too. I guess my headache wasn't completely gone. "It's bearable right now," I told him. "I'm sure they're already feeding me enough through my IV. The pain isn't unbearable. If it hurts too bad, I'll ask for something."

We just stared at each other for a few moments without speaking. I couldn't discern the look on his face, probably because I was still so out of it. Finally, he spoke. "I'm so sorry, Anastasia. I just can't tell you enough how much I regret letting this happen to you."

"It wasn't your fault, Christian," I reminded him.

"It was, Ana," Christian insisted. "That bastard had it in for me. He hurt you because of me. And I should have been able to protect you. I should have done more to make sure you were safe. I should have..."

"Christian..." I raised my hand and put my fingers over his lips to stop him from talking. He responded by kissing my fingers before I continued, "Just shut up, OK? Shut up. I don't want to hear it. I don't blame you, so stop fucking blaming yourself. You couldn't control the fucked-up actions of a raving lunatic. Just stop it. You're pissing me off, OK? And I'm already pissed off enough as it is. I don't want to be pissed off at you too."

Christian nodded. "OK," he replied. "I won't say it anymore. But you've got to know... This has changed me. If I was concerned about security before... that has just increased tenfold. I've been busy while you've been sleeping, Anastasia. I'm in the process of hiring CPOs for every member of my family, including my parents and siblings, whether they like it or not. Christina already has Ryan, but I'm adding a new female to her, so she'll have two officers. You still have Prescott, but I'm hiring somebody new for you too, at least until Sawyer recovers, if he does. For the foreseeable future, he's out of commission, and you need somebody now, in addition to Prescott. Don't argue with me about it, Ana. I'm going to do whatever I need to do to make sure the people I love are safe."

I wanted to laugh. Christian thought I'd fight him about security? Nothing could be further from reality. I didn't feel safe, so I welcomed more security, as long as they were trustworthy, and I trusted Christian to hire good people. Of course, he didn't need to pay my CPOs' salaries, but at the moment, I didn't really care. I knew we'd work that detail out later. I had another more immediate concern. "What about you, Christian?" I asked.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"Who are you hiring for yourself, in addition to Taylor?" I asked.

He looked confused. "I don't need anyone else," he answered.

I argued, "Yes, you do. If I need two people, and if Christina needs two people, then so do you. If you don't hire someone to work with Taylor to protect you, I will."

"Don't be ridiculous, Ana," Christian responded. "I don't need you to hire security for me. I'm Christian Grey." Arrogant son of a bitch.

Now I really wanted to laugh. Who was being ridiculous? "I could have responded with the same arrogance that you just did, but I didn't," I pointed out. "I'm Anastasia Steele. I might not look or feel like it right now, but I have a reputation for being a badass too. I may not be quite as powerful as you, but I'm pretty damn close, in theory anyway. But at the moment, I feel pretty fucking powerless, so I'm OK with you hiring an additional officer for me. But you realize that Hyde was after you, and he only got to me to get to you. He could have easily gotten to you. I'm sure you have a lot of other enemies, being who you are. Who's protecting you, besides Taylor?"

Christian stared at me mutely for a moment or two. Then, without responding to what I'd just said, he picked up his phone and pushed a button. A moment later, Taylor opened the door. "Yes, sir?" he asked.

"Hire an additional CPO for me, to be your partner," Christian ordered him.

"Sir?" Taylor questioned confusedly.

"OK, let me clarify," Christian responded. "You're my head of security. It's a big job that's just going to get bigger as we are hiring so many few officers. So I need an additional CPO." He glanced at me before he added with a smirk, "My goddess insists."

Taylor raised his eyebrows in shock, but only for a fraction of a second. This was followed by a smirk of his own, which also only lasted for fraction of a second. Then he was back to his stoic self, and he responded, "Yes, sir." He looked at me and added, "Ma'am... I mean Ana."

As soon as Taylor closed the door behind him, I couldn't hold back my laughter any longer. But I instantly regretted it. "Oh! God, that hurts!"

"Sorry, babe," Christian replied.

"That's Goddess to you," I told him snarkily.

He smirked at me and said, "I'm glad you're feeling better."

"I still feel like shit," I disagreed.

Christian nodded, "I know. Can I ask you something?"

"Of course," I answered.

"Do you feel well enough to talk about work?" he asked.

"Oh, God," I answered. "Ismintis! What am I going to do, Christian?"

He sat down on the bed and took my hand before he asked, "How would you feel about me... helping you... with Ismintis? While you're out sick?"

I had to think about it for a moment. "How would that work, Christian?" I asked. "You're my competition. I trust you... you know that... But my employees are a different matter. They don't know that you have my best interests in mind. They'd probably see it as a ruthless move to take me over when I'm weak."

"Do you trust me?" Christian asked.

"Of course I trust you," I answered without hesitation.

Christian got off the bed, picked up his laptop, and then sat back down on the edge of the bed. He explained, "I was a bit out of my mind last night. With all the stress, of all that's happened, I wasn't really thinking about how I'd be perceived by your employees. You're right of course... they'll be suspicious as hell. But I wasn't thinking about that. So anyway, I talked to Ros about how to help you, because I knew how worried you were about Ismintis. Ros reminded me that your employees wouldn't take orders from me."

I chuckled, which made me groan again. I had to remember... laughter was not my friend right now. "I bet it was hard for you to admit that you didn't have control over something," I remarked.

Christian chuckled too. "Yeah," he admitted. "Anyway... Ros said that your employees would only listen to me if you gave them a direct order to do so. She suggested I draft a message for you, so I did. She's done that kind of thing for me a number of times in the past, where she'd draft a letter for me, but then I'd be the one to approve it and send it out. So that's what I was planning to do with the letter I drafted for you. But then, this morning, I got to thinking more about it, and I'm still concerned that your employees won't take it well, if I'm still in charge of GEH, and I'm also temporarily in charge of them. So I came up with a different solution.

Now I was really curious. What was he planning? He was looking at his laptop, so I asked, "What is it? Let me see."

Christian placed the laptop in front of me, carefully avoiding my wounds. "This memo is from me. I redrafted the one from you, which I'll show you after this one. This is what I want to send my own employees."

I read through the memo, not sure I was seeing what I thought I was seeing. "You're taking a leave of absence from GEH?" I asked him.

Christian nodded. "It's the only way I can see there not being a conflict of interest. Hell, I'll still be accused of having a conflict of interest, but at least neither of us has a board to answer to. It's our decision to make. If you agree, I will put Ros temporarily in charge of GEH. She's fully capable, and I trust her with my life. Then, I'll act as your COO, temporarily, until you're fully recovered and able to return."

I could hardly believe what Christian was offering, all out of his love and concern for me. I knew people might interpret his actions differently, but I knew where they were coming from, and I was in awe. I didn't know what to say. He must have seen the shock on my face, because he added, "It's only for a few weeks, Anastasia. You're going to be back in the office before you know it, and then I'll go back to GEH. In the meantime, I'll just make sure things keep running as they should. I'll make sure your executive staff is on top of everything, and respond to their reports as you would. I'll make sure you don't lose any important deals you've been working on. But I'll also be here for you."

I could see the thought and effort that he'd put in to this. He'd clearly thought it through, and even though I knew some of my employees weren't going to be happy, I knew it was what I needed to do. "Where is the memo you drafted for me?" I asked Christian.

He opened it and put the laptop in front of me again. "Change anything you want to, but just let me know so I can make sure we're on the same page," he said.

I didn't need to change anything. I read the memo carefully three times. He had taken great effort to communicate everything very clearly and efficiently, and I could not have done a better job myself. After I'd read it through for the third time, I opened up my email account and copied and pasted the memo into an e-mail to all of my executive staff. When I clicked the send button, I essentially placed Christian in charge of Ismintis for the next six weeks. I looked up at him and said, "Done."

He looked surprised. "You sent it? Just like that? I figured you'd want to discuss it more first."

"There's nothing to discuss, and I don't have the energy," I told him. "You're in charge for the next six weeks. Maybe longer, if I need more time."

Christian nodded. Then he took the laptop and sent his own memo to his staff, alerting them that he was taking a temporary leave of absence from GEH.

"You have discussed this with Ros, haven't you?" I asked him.

"I've been emailing back and forth with her all morning," he assured me. "She's on board." He looked up at me and added, "I think after this is over, I want to make Ros a part owner. What do you think?"

"What do I think?" I asked confusedly. "It's GEH. I don't have any say."

"Oh, shit," Christian responded. "I forgot. You still don't know. I'd planned... It's one of the things I'd wanted us to talk about when we went sailing."

His reminder of our foiled plans made me sad. "I'm not going to be able to sail for a while now," I said.

"We'll go sailing as soon as you have enough energy to walk out of this room," Christian assured me. "But what I wanted to discuss with you... what I've already done... is to make you half owner of GEH, effective the day we marry. So yes, princess, you do have a say in giving a share of GEH to Ros."

My jaw was probably on the floor. He'd done what? "You made me half owner? Of GEH?" My voice was so high I sounded like a mouse.

"Of course," Christian replied. "You're going to be my wife, Anastasia. I love you. Half of everything I own is yours. I just decided to go ahead to complete the paperwork to prove it."

"Holy shit, Christian," I said. "I haven't even thought about... Are you saying... you want me to have part CONTROL of GEH?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying, Anastasia. I want to share EVERYTHING with you."

"But... why don't we just merge our companies then?" I asked.

"That would be really presumptuous of me, if I suggested that," Christian answered. "You've never seemed interested in merging. I think you feel pretty strongly about Ismintis International being independent. It's your company, baby, and you're proud of it, as well you should be. Ana... you need to understand... I don't have any expectations from you. You aren't under any obligations to reciprocate my actions. Ismintis is yours. I'm going to help keep it at the top... for you. Not because I want a piece of it."

Could I love this man more? I think I just fell a little deeper. My God, what wouldn't he give me? What wouldn't he do for me?

"Of course I'm going to reciprocate, Christian. I love you too. I want to share everything," I told him.

"That's not what I'm asking you for, Anastasia," Christian assured me.

"I know, but it's what I'm giving," I insisted. "It's what I want..."

Our conversation was interrupted by a knock at the door. Samantha Gilbert entered a moment later. She smiled when she saw that I was awake, but it seemed forced. "Ana! I'm glad you're awake! How are you feeling?" Before I'd had a chance to answer, she kept talking, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't ask you that. I can imagine how you're feeling. You're probably sick of people asking you that. I'm glad you're OK. I mean, I'm sure you don't feel OK yet, but you will be OK. I'm glad you're not... dead. I'm glad you're alive."

It wasn't like Samantha to seem so... nervous. What was going on here? "I'm glad I'm... alive... too, Samantha," I told her.

Samantha glanced nervously at Christian. There was some kind of question in her eyes that I didn't understand. The look Christian gave her was equally confusing. They were obviously keeping something from me."

"What is it?" I asked. It sounded more like a demand.

Samantha looked guilty. "What do you mean?" she asked.

I sighed. "I may be in a hospital bed recovering from life-threatening injuries, but I wasn't born yesterday. You're being secretive. I saw the looks that just passed between you. So I'll ask again. What is it?"

Samantha rolled her eyes, which made me want to laugh, but I'd learned my lesson earlier about the pain that comes with laughter. Besides, their secrecy was beginning to piss me off. Samantha looked at Christian when she said, "Don't ever try to have an affair or anything equally stupid. This one will sniff you out in a heartbeat. You can't keep anything from her." With that, Samantha walked out the door without answering my question.

"What the hell was that?" I asked Christian.

He sighed deeply and didn't answer, so I waited. I waited for at least another minute or two, during which Christian stared at me without speaking. I could see that he was internally debating something, and I wasn't going to like it, no matter what conclusion he finally came to.

Finally, I'd had enough. "Christian, just fucking tell me," I snapped. "If you don't, then my mind will create all kinds of shit to fill in the blanks."

Christian sighed again before he responded, "I doubt your mind can create anything this horrible, Anastasia, despite the horrors you've already suffered. You know, I would never keep anything from you without a good reason. I don't want to tell you. You need to recover more before..."

"No!" I yelled. "I want to fucking know everything. Don't keep shit from me, Christian!"

He sighed a third time, and said, "Fine. I'll tell you. But you need to know, baby, that it's against my better judgment. And I'm worried as fuck about how you're going to take it."

"You're stalling," I accused him.

"OK," Christian said with resignation. "It's about the video of your attack."

"You said you haven't seen it," I accused him.

"I haven't," Christian insisted. "But..." He stalled again, clearly not wanting to tell me whatever it was about that damn video. He cleared his throat before he finally blurted it out. "The son of a bitch live streamed it. Samantha saw it. She called 911. That's why she was acting strangely."

I'm sure I must have looked like my eyes were going to pop out of my head. "What? Live streamed? How many...? How many people... saw it?"

Christian shook his head. He rubbed his eyes, where I could see tears building. "I don't know. Samantha said... there's no way to know. But she was able to take it down, so it's not online now, but the live stream was."

My brain felt numb. "You were right," I told Christian. "I would have been better off not knowing about this." With that, I began to sob, and as I cried on Christian's shoulder for God knows how long, I felt his own tears dampening my hair.


	41. Ch 41: Figuring Out What Matters (APOV)

**Chapter 41: Figuring Out What Matters (Anastasia's POV)**

Five days, seven hours, and thirty-five minutes, give or take. That was Christian's estimate of how long I was in the hospital before I was finally discharged.

Five days, two hours, and forty-five minutes, give or take. That's how long it had been, by my own calculations, since I'd been home from the hospital. "Home" to Grey Manor, that is. I agreed with Christian that going back to Escala, to any of our penthouses there, was a bad idea. Mine was where Hyde had first attacked me, and where he'd shot Luke and killed Nurse Hillary. Christian's was where most of my nightmare had occurred, and neither of us was ready to step foot back there again. The third penthouse, where Christian's staff had lived, didn't make sense for us either. So we decided to put all three of them on the market. We would never return to Escala.

But Grey Manor wasn't home either, and I was going out of my mind. Something had to change. The past ten days, ten hours, and twenty minutes, or whatever it was, had been the most difficult of my life, and I wasn't sure how I was going to keep it together for another day unless I made a drastic change.

There had been bright spots throughout, which made the horrific events a little more bearable. Perhaps the brightest of all was currently curled up in my lap, watching cartoons. I couldn't lift or carry her, but I could hold her. Christina and I had been doing some serious bonding over the past few days, and I was happy to see that she was adapting well to life at Grey Manor. She had asked for Leila a few times, and there hadn't been an easy way to tell her that Mommy had to go away, but she hadn't been as distraught as I had feared she would be. I knew it would take time for her to begin to recognize me as her new mommy, and I didn't necessarily want to rush it. I didn't want her to forget Leila, but I knew she would if Christian and I didn't work at preserving Leila's memory. For that reason, I asked Kate to arrange getting a still shot of Leila from the day of the interview. I wanted to enlarge it and hang it in Christina's room, once we finally got settled into a home. We would always refer to Leila as Christina's first mommy, and as our angel. I would never forget the fact that Leila had saved my life, and I was forever in her debt. I would do my very best to keep my promise to her and parent Christina to the best of my ability.

Another bright spot in my seemingly unending darkness was my dad, who was still staying at Grey Manor. I'd been worried that he was going to remain hostile to Christian, believing all kinds of evil shit about him, but that wasn't the case. He had been sincere when he apologized. He'd already had lunch twice with Christian since I'd been home from the hospital, and Christian said it had gone well both times. He said Dad was even considering retiring and moving to Seattle to be closer to us. And Dad had taken to Christina just as he had taken to me, as if we were both his biological offspring. Thank God that Dad was one less person that I had to worry about.

Of course I also had Christian's family and our friends surrounding me. Grace and Carrick treated me as if I were already their daughter-in-law, and Mia quickly became besties with both me and Kate. Everyone did due diligence to make sure that I was completely safe and as comfortable as possible. Someone was always there to lift Christina from my lap, and to get me anything I asked for. Really, they were all incredibly wonderful, which is why I felt guilty as the days passed that I began to resent their continual presence. I needed some time to myself, but everyone was being so helpful that I didn't know how to ask for it.

Kate was another one of my wonderful bright spots. She never failed to take my side on any and every issue. When the media became an additional nightmare for me, Kate used her own connections to steer the story in a direction more favorable to me. Thanks to Kate, I went from being a rape victim to a racist bitch to an outraged survivor. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I want to focus on all the bright spots in my life before I focus on the horrors, and it's hard to think about how Kate has come through for me without thinking of the paparazzi terrorists. But I'll get back to those assholes. First, the positive.

Another bright spot had been visiting Luke in the hospital. I was finally able on the third morning of waking up in the hospital to talk Christian into wheeling me down to Luke's room. Christian had done his best to prepare me, and I knew from his warnings that there was a very strong likelihood that Luke wouldn't recognize me. I just needed to make sure that his medical needs were being taken care of. I knew Luke had good insurance; I'd made sure of it. But if there were any treatments or medications that weren't covered by insurance, I wanted to be sure that the hospital staff taking care of Luke knew not to hold anything back, and to bill me for anything insurance didn't cover. Besides, I needed to see Luke for myself, just to see that he had survived. I couldn't get the memory of seeing him lying on the floor of my penthouse, with a pool of blood under his head, out of my mind.

When we entered his room, Luke perked up. I wasn't sure if I should introduce myself to him or wait and see if he knew me. He answered the question for me.

"I know you," he said. He sounded slightly unsure, but I saw the recognition in his eyes.

I smiled at him. "Yes, you do," I told him. "I'm Ana."

"You're Ana," he repeated. He seemed a little excited when he added, "You're the first person I've seen that I've been able to remember. I know your face. I finally remembered my own name. Luke Sawyer. But I couldn't remember anything beyond that at first. Over the past day or two, pieces of my life have been coming back... growing up in Missouri, enlisting in the Marines, special ops... but nothing recent. I know we're in Seattle, but I have no idea how I got here. But you... I know you. I remember driving in a car with you. And waiting in an office where you were working. You have both a desktop and a laptop computer, and you work on both of them at the same time."

I was so happy and relieved to hear Luke's words. "Yes, that's pretty much our daily routine," I told him. "And you're right. I do a lot of multi-tasking."

"Are we... together?" Luke asked hesitantly, which made Christian perk up, his body language immediately becoming more possessive.

I chuckled, which was still painful, but not as much as it had been the previous day. I answered Luke, "No, not like that. We're friends. You work for me." Then I motioned to Christian and told Luke, "You probably don't remember Christian. He's my fiancee."

"Christian," Luke repeated. "Were you here a couple of days ago?"

"I was," Christian affirmed. "But you didn't recognize me."

"Yeah, I still don't remember. You look familiar, but I'm not sure if it's because I saw you a couple of days ago or if I'm thinking of something else. The doctors said I shouldn't push myself too hard to remember, and that things will come back slowly. A lot of it already has. Some of it might never come back."

"I'm kind of well known, so you might have seen my face in the news," Christian said. "But you've been seeing a lot of me lately, since Anastasia and I have been together."

Luke turned back to me and said, "I'll probably be embarrassed when I get my memory back that I asked you that."

"What, if we're together?" I asked. "Don't be embarrassed about that. We're together a lot. I can see how you'd wonder, considering your memory is just coming back."

"Do I have a girlfriend?" Luke asked tentatively.

"Not that I'm aware of," I answered. "But I'm not really sure what you do on your time off."

Luke thought about that for a moment. "I probably don't," he said. "I probably haven't gotten over my ex yet. I was engaged. I remember that. She cheated on me. I remember that too."

"Damn! Sorry to hear that," I told him. "You've never mentioned it before."

"I guess I wouldn't have," he answered. "I also have a sister back in Joplin. Emily. She was Carrie's best friend. Took her side when we broke up. So I lost my sister too."

"Does she know you're in the hospital?" I asked.

"Not likely," Luke answered. "I didn't list her as next of kin, and our parents are dead. She has no way of knowing."

"Would you like us to contact her?" Christian asked.

"Could you do that?" Luke asked. When Christian nodded, Luke said, "Yeah, I miss her. We were only thirteen months apart, so we were more like twins growing up. And she didn't know about all the shit that happened with Carrie. She didn't believe me when I tried to tell her. Probably thought it was all my fault. I didn't stay. I think I reenlisted then. It's foggy. I know I left, but it happened before I moved here. I think it was 2010. My wedding date was supposed to have been June 12, 2010. But I think all the shit hit the fan a couple of months before that. I know I wasn't anywhere near Missouri on June 12 of that year."

"Emily Sawyer?" Christian asked. He had his phone out, typing as he spoke. "From Joplin, Missouri?"

"Sawyer's her maiden name. She got married a year before I left for good. Husband's name is Jay Wallace. She was using a hyphenated name. I'm not sure if they're still married. He was an asshole, so hopefully not."

"So... Emily Sawyer or Sawyer-Wallace. From Joplin," Christian clarified.

"Her asshole husband was from Neosho," Luke answered. "Tiny little town not far from Joplin. They might have moved there."

"OK, I'm on it," Christian responded.

Luke turned back to me and asked, "Can you help fill in some missing pieces... mainly, how did I end up here?"

"In Seattle or in the hospital?" I clarified.

"Well, both," he responded. "I was mainly asking about the hospital. How'd I end up with a bullet in my head? But I wouldn't mind knowing how I got to Seattle, if you know that too."

I nodded, which still made my head hurt a little. "You're my CPO. Close Protective Officer."

"Ah, I'm private security now," he said with realization.

I explained, "Yeah, and I used a headhunting service to find you. You came highly qualified, with very strong recommendations. The best of the best, which is exactly what I needed. I had just had some articles published about me, which pushed me into the spotlight, and the paparazzi was becoming a nuisance."

"Anastasia Steele," Luke said as he remembered more. "Ismintis International. I remember."

"Very good," I said happily.

"You're a badass," he told me.

I chucked again, ignoring the slight pain it caused me. "Not so badass right now."

"You're injured too," he pointed out. "So how did I end up with a bullet in my head, and you end up in that wheelchair?" he asked.

"The wheelchair is because my doctor, as well as my fiancee here, both insist on it. I can walk, just not very far yet." I paused, unsure of how much I should tell him. "I... was attacked. We both were. You were in my penthouse, and I was next door at Christian's. We put in a door to connect them. When I came through the door from Christian's penthouse to mine, I found you. Our attacker had surprised you from behind. I doubt you ever even saw him. I thought he'd killed you. Then he almost killed me. But we both survived."

Luke was silent for a minute, processing my words. Finally, he said, "My doctors say it's a miracle I'm not paralyzed. They think I'm probably going to make a full recovery, except I might have some gaps in memory. I'm not really sure why I'm still alive, but I'm sure there's a reason."

Now I was the one who needed to process. Why was I still alive? Why had Leila been able to get out of her bed, after days of sleeping, when we believed that she was going to die in her sleep from her cancer at any moment? Why and how had Leila had the where-with-all after being so sick to call 911, to grab Luke's gun, and to find me next door in Christian's penthouse? How had she had the strength to even shoot the gun? Luke's words struck a chord with me. I knew then that there was a reason why I was still alive, and it would be my life's mission to figure it out.

It took Christian's people less than 24 hours to locate Emily Sawyer, with no hyphen and apparently no husband. I got to meet her shortly before I was discharged from the hospital. She hadn't wasted any time getting to Seattle and to Luke's bedside as soon as she got off the phone with Christian. Apparently, she had already been searching for Luke but hadn't been able to find him.

Luke's memory was even more recovered in the two days since I'd seen him. He'd proved it when, shortly after Christian and I had arrived in his room, he asked me about the night of the munch, when I'd first met Christian. "I have this vague memory of picking you up in the middle of the night, when it was raining. You weren't wearing a coat or any shoes, just a cocktail dress. Did that really happen?"

Christian glared at me, and I felt my face heating. Yeah, that really happened, and my Dom didn't let me forget it. The thought made me sad for a moment, since I didn't know where we stood anymore, but I pushed the thought aside so I could respond to Sawyer. "That was the night I met Christian. He made me feel so confused that I forgot my shoes and coat."

Sawyer smiled teasingly, the way a brother smiles at a sister. "I guess you aren't confused anymore if you're going to marry him."

I smiled back, not at Sawyer but at Christian. "No, not confused anymore," I agreed. But it wasn't true. I was still very confused, and I knew from the look in Christian's eyes that he knew it. But it wasn't a conversation to have at the moment.

Emily, Luke's sister, had been taking a shower in the hospital room's ensuite when we arrived, but she came out at that moment, and we introduced ourselves. She was so thankful for his contacting her that she almost hugged Christian, until he backed away from her. He quickly explained his touch issues, which she seemed to understand. I liked her almost immediately. It turned out that she had a nursing degree, and even though her specialization was pediatric nursing, she was determined to stay with Luke for the foreseeable future and help him recover.

During our visit, they told us the story of Luke's failed engagement, and Emily's failed marriage, which, in fact, was one and the same story. Luke had actually caught his ex-fiancee in bed with Jay, Emily's husband at the time. Luke had told Emily, but she not only hadn't believed him but also accused him of being jealous, a reaction which she said that she forever regretted. She and Luke had argued, and the result was that Luke had left town, never to return. When she tried to find him later, she couldn't. It wasn't until Christian contacted her that she was able to get back in touch with Luke.

Apparently, Carrie and Jay, the cheaters, had been a couple when they'd all been in high school, but they'd supposedly broken up around the same time that Luke and Emily's parents had died in a plane crash, which was during Luke's senior year and Emily's junior year of high school. Shortly after that, Jay had pursued a relationship with Emily. At first, Emily had put him off because he was her supposed best friend's ex-boyfriend. But Carrie herself had encouraged the relationship. They were supposedly still friends and had no hard feelings. A couple of years later, after they'd all finished high school and had started attending the local community college, Emily and Jay had gotten married. Luke had enlisted in the Marines right out of high school, but he returned for the wedding, and Carrie took advantage of that opportunity to get his attention. For over a year, they'd had a long-distance relationship as Luke returned to service. They'd even gotten engaged while Luke was still in service. But when he was able to be honorably discharged, he returned to Joplin, only to find his bride-to-be in bed with his brother-in-law. Shit had hit the fan, and Luke had hit the road.

Emily was ashamed that she had refused to believe Luke, and that she had argued with him. She was also humiliated that her ex-husband and ex-best friend had been able to fool her for so long. Apparently, they'd never broken up. Instead, they'd concocted a plan to get money that they thought Luke and Emily had inherited after their parents died. The ironic thing was, there was no money, or not much anyway. The Sawyers had not been a wealthy family. They'd had a life insurance policy that provided for Luke and Emily, but they didn't leave them the millions that Jay and Carrie for some reason believed they had.

It had only taken a few weeks for Emily to find out the truth, but by then, Luke was long gone, and she had no way of contacting him since he'd gotten rid of his old phone number and deleted his old email accounts. He was done with Joplin, and everything in it. Emily had said some hurtful things to him during their argument, and he didn't think he'd ever be able to forgive her. He'd been wrong, thankfully. He said that forgiving her was easy, with all that had happened. He had his sister back, so he was happy.

When I left Luke and Emily in his hospital room, I felt a bit uplifted. After all the horrible things that had happened, something good had come out of it. Luke had his sister back, and he was going to be OK. I knew it would still be a few months before he would be able to return to work, but he was going to be OK.

Other bright spots were my therapist Dr. Geeta Patel, and my nurse, Veronica, who both visited me daily. Christian had tried to convince me to have a full-time nurse, but I fought him and won. After all, it was the nurse who had almost certainly been the one to assist Hyde. Nurse Hillary had been the one to let him in... before he killed her. For good reason, I didn't trust a full-time nurse, and I didn't think I needed one. Christian did a very extensive background check on Nurse Veronica, a Ghanian immigrant who was very sweet and very professional. I liked her more every day that passed, but I didn't regret not having her around me all the time. My body was healing, slowly but surely. I did need help bathing, changing my bandages, and making sure all of my wounds were healing. I enjoyed Veronica's motherly attention, I admit. My mom had never been very motherly, but I missed her, especially now. Veronica made everything easier, and I appreciated her.

I had been meeting daily with Geeta, a psychiatrist who was a leading specialist in sexual trauma, since my third day in the hospital. Christian had suggested that I meet with his own psychiatrist, John Flynn, but I knew this would be a bad idea. We each needed our own therapists. So far, we had met with Geeta one time together, and she suggested weekly joint meetings going forward. These meetings were not easy, but I knew they were crucial because I wanted to heal in every way. Geeta didn't have to tell me that it would take time to work through everything; I already knew it. Geeta didn't try to pacify me; she was a straight shooter, which I liked. She made an immediate good first impression on me, and I felt that I had been making progress in our sessions.

Of all my bright spots, excluding only Christina perhaps, Christian was the brightest by far. I fell more deeply in love with him everyday. He was perfect. Each night, he held me tenderly as we slept in his childhood room, and throughout each day, he kept me informed about everything that was happening at Ismintis International, making sure I had the final say in every important decision. As expected, some of my employees had been suspicious, but I think I was able to convince them that Christian was trustworthy with just a few phone calls. Of course, time would tell how much they truly trusted him. Christian himself was keeping everything on the up and up, being as transparent as possible with all my staff so they could hopefully see that he didn't have any ulterior motives. I think he proved himself to most of them when, on my second day home from the hospital, he was able to close a deal for less than half what I'd been expecting to pay. I wasn't sure how he'd done it, but I wouldn't put it past him to have been calling in favors just to please me.

With all of these bright spots, especially Christian, it was extremely difficult for me to do what I needed to do. Only Geeta knew what I was considering, and she thought it would be good for me. I felt guilty though, because I knew that Christian needed me as much as I needed him. However, when even more shit hit the fan on my fifth day home from the hospital, I knew things had to change, and I knew what I needed to do.

Of all the horror that I'd already seen, I'm not sure what was worse, Hyde's attack, or the paparazzi's. Somehow they'd gotten word that I was going to be released from the hospital, and they created several safety hazards trying to get to me before I'd even left the hospital. There was no doubt that some of them had seen my attack, as their hackles made evident. I was shocked that any any self-respecting member of the press could go to such ends to harass a victim of rape, which they all knew I was. They all knew that my rape had been live streamed, whether they had seen it or not.

Christian had warned me, as had my own PR team from Ismintis, to ignore them as we made a mad dash for Christian's SUV. However, when one asshole reporter called out to me, asking me if I enjoyed the attack, I came unglued. Holy fucking shit! How dare he?! I stopped in my tracks, with my jaw to the ground for I'm not sure how long, but I'm sure it looked like an hour in the news feeds. Then I addressed the slimeball reporter, which was apparently a big mistake.

"I'm sorry... did you just ask me if I enjoyed being almost beaten and stabbed to death? Or did you think that I would enjoy being raped? Is that what you were referring to?" I got in his face as I continued, and although I didn't realize it until later, my voice sounded more hysterical as I continued speaking. "Did you see it, you fucking moron? Were you entertained by the live stream of the most horrific nightmare I've ever experienced? Did you get off on the worse thing that I've ever even imagined? What... you think because I admitted that I like kink with my fiancee that I would like to be raped and terrorized by a monster? Seriously? There's a hell of a big difference, you stupid shit for brains. Rape is not consensual, you fucking cockroach! Why don't you crawl back into the hole you crawled out of!"

That was all I had a chance to say, as Christian literally picked me up and carried me to the SUV. What I didn't realize until afterwards was that the reporter who had quickly become the target of my wrath was Hispanic, and the word on the street quickly became that I was being racist when I called him a cockroach. Seriously? It didn't matter that Ismintis had branches in Mexico City and Buenes Aires that employed hundreds of people, or that there were two Latinas in my executive staff. The media seemed determined to make me into something I wasn't.

This was essentially how I became a prisoner, and Grey Manor became my prison walls. I couldn't leave the compound at all, and even walks down to the shore of Lake Washington seemed risky. I knew I was supposed to walk as much as I could as part of my recovery process, but I also realized how easy it would be for someone to spy on me from neighboring property with a good camera with a telescopic lens, or even with a drone. I didn't feel safe, so I stayed inside most of the time. When I did venture outside, I made sure Prescott or another security officer was with me, so I was never alone. Even though I longed to be left by myself, I didn't feel safe. The library of Grey Manor was still my favorite room, and it was where I spent most of my time. I even had my therapy sessions there. It hadn't been difficult to convince Geeta to come to Grey Manor for my continued daily sessions. She was very aware of the continued stress that the paparazzi gave me, which was the main reason she encouraged me to follow through with my idea.

As I mentioned earlier, Kate helped a lot with the media chaos. She spun the story differently, so within just a few hours, I went from being an elitist racist to a strong survivor. She interviewed some of my employees from diverse ethnic backgrounds, who spoke out in my defense. Kate also called in favors to create a social media outcry on my behalf... that a rape victim could be treated the way that I had been when leaving the hospital was a shame and disgrace. The asshole reporter who'd become the object of my wrath was condemned by Kate's followers. It helped a lot, not only with my media reputation, but also with my morale. It was one of the reasons I had such mixed feelings about what I needed to do.

I didn't make up my mind until that fifth day, but a final nail in the coffin sealed the deal for me. I got an email from, of all people, an editor from Playboy Magazine. They wanted my permission to publish photos... of me! Photos that I didn't even know existed. Photos that had been taken over two years ago... by none other than my asshole ex-boyfriend Jose fucking Rodrigues. The editor included thumbprints, and oh my God! The asshole had taken pictures of me while I was sleeping! Nude! As if the country hadn't already seen enough of my naked body when THEY WATCHED MY LIVE-STREAMED RAPE!

I was beyond outraged. I wanted to kill someone. I lost track of what happened between first reading that email and finding myself in Carrick's study drinking a glass of scotch. Had I killed someone? I had no recollection of how I ended up sitting in Carrick's study, staring at him as he sat across from me.

"Ummm... Carrick..." I shook my head to try to clear it. "How did I get here?"

Carrick smiled sadly at me. "What's the last thing you remember?"

I thought about it for a moment. "I read an email from Playboy Magazine. They want to make me their covergirl because my slimeball ex-boyfriend from a couple of years ago took nude photos of me that he tried to sell them. I want to kill him, Carrick. I want to fucking kill him!"

"Anastasia, you asked me for legal advice, so my first advice is this. Don't tell your attorney when you're planning to kill someone." He smiled sadly again. I knew he was trying to make a joke, because he didn't think I was really capable of murder. I wasn't so sure about that myself. I wasn't sure anymore what I was capable of.

"What did I miss, Carrick?" I asked.

"Nothing to be concerned about, dear," he answered. "You... asked me for some legal advice, and I read the email. Even if they legally could, which they can't, Playboy won't publish these photos without your permission. You don't need to worry about them. I'll take care of it for you. But this young man, the photographer, he's another story. If you want my legal advice..."

"Yes, I do," I jumped in.

"You need to file a lawsuit against him for invading your privacy. Ask for an immediate injunction to stop him from selling the photos to anyone else. You might find this hard to believe, but Playboy has... standards. He can easily find a buyer without the same standards."

"Do it, Carrick. I'll pay you whatever you charge. Bill me for it."

"Don't be ridiculous, Anastasia," Carrick scoffed. "You're almost my daughter."

Christian picked just that moment to come storming into Carrick's study. "Ana! Are you OK? What the hell happened to the library?!"

I stared at him in confusion. "What do you mean?" I asked. "I'm fine, Christian. What's wrong with the library?"

Carrick responded, "Anastasia had a bit of a... shocking email. She didn't... umm.. respond well. Don't worry about it, son. Grace is already giving our staff instructions for taking care of the library."

"Wait, what?" I asked. "What did I do, Carrick? I don't remember."

Carrick shook his head. "That's a conversation for another day... maybe with Dr. Patel tomorrow. Not anything you need to worry about right now."

"But..." I tried to argue, but Christian stopped me.

"What do you mean she received a shocking email?" he asked. "What now, and why wasn't I notified?"

"It's not a security threat," I told him. "Well, not mine anyway. My ex-boyfriend's life might be in danger. I might kill him."

"What ex-boyfriend, and what did he do?" Christian demanded.

"Jose Rodriguez," I answered. "I'd forgotten that the asshole is a photographer."

"What did that limp-dicked son of a bitch do?" Christian asked.

"He tried to sell nude photos of me to Playboy!" I announced.

"What!?" Christian shouted. "I'll kill him!"

"Children!" Carrick yelled. "Nobody is killing anybody! We're suing him, not committing murder. I will serve him tomorrow, Anastasia. You don't need to worry about this. You asked me to represent you, so it's best if you don't have any contact with Mr. Rodriguez yourself. All communication needs to be through me."

"That's fine, Carrick. I wasn't really going to kill him," I told him. But I wasn't really sure.

Grace came to the door at that moment. "Dinner's almost ready," she announced. "How are you feeling, dear?" she asked me.

"What did I do, Grace?" I asked her.

"You just had a bit of a meltdown, honey," she answered. "It's perfectly understandable. Don't worry about it. Gail was already here helping out with Christina, and she took it upon herself to help Greta get things back in order."

I felt mortified. "Did I... destroy the library?" I asked tentatively.

"You don't remember?" Christian asked.

"I have no recollection of what happened between reading that email and ending up here in Carrick's office. I don't even know how much time passed between the two."

Carrick said, "Like I said... don't worry about it, Anastasia. Talk about it with your therapist tomorrow."

"Carry's right," Grace chimed in. "This is not something for you to feel embarrassed about. Your reaction was very normal, all things considered. Let's put it out of our minds for now and go eat dinner."

I still wasn't able to eat much, but I was on solid food, and had been since coming home from the hospital. Grace had given her kitchen staff very specific orders about my diet, and they prepared foods that would supposedly speed my recovery. I ate a few bites of the perfectly seasoned chicken breast with roasted red peppers and kale salad, but I really couldn't handle much. I hadn't been hungry since my attack, and now I was frazzled. In spite of Carrick and Grace's comforting words, I felt disconcerted that I couldn't remember an apparent breakdown that I'd had. What was wrong with me? Was I actually getting better, or was this a sign that I was losing my mind?

I had already made most of the arrangements. My pilot was on standby, and my newest plane was ready to fly. The property manager of my home in Hawaii had already gotten it ready for me. Geeta and I had a plan to continue our sessions via Skype, so this wasn't a concern. But there were a few loose ends that I needed to tie up. I would still need a nurse, at least once a day or possible every two days. And security... I didn't dare go anywhere without protective officers, and I hadn't yet said anything to Prescott. I knew Christian was hiring an additional officer for me, but we'd let it slide for the past few days since I wasn't going anywhere, and there was plenty of security already at Grey Manor.

It was time to tell Christian, and I had been dreading this moment for the past few days. I waited until after we'd put Christina to bed. Normally, we'd spend the evening back in the library, but Christian hadn't let me go near it, so I still didn't know what kind of mess I'd made. Instead, we walked hand-in-hand down to the pier and ended up in the boathouse.

"I need to tell you something," I said as I sat down on the sofa.

Christian took a seat next to me and responded, "Don't say it, Ana."

I looked at him in confusion. What did he think I was going to say? "I have to, Christian."

He shook his head and looked completely dejected. "Don't," he repeated.

He was worrying me. This was not the way this needed to go. "What do you think I'm going to say?" I asked him.

He looked at me sadly and answered, "Ana, I'm in charge of Ismintis now, remember? I know everything that's going on. You got your jet ready. Your pilot is on standby. You're leaving me."

Well, shit! When it put it like that... "Christian... I'm not leaving you," I argued. "Well, I am, but not like you make it sound. It's just for a few days. I'm going out of my mind here. I've got to get away from Seattle. I want to go to Hawaii and spend some time in my home there, just until Kate and Elliot's wedding."

"That's next week," he reminded me.

"Yeah, I know," I replied. "In Fiji. Hawaii is about half way between here and Fiji."

"Well, that's convenient," Christian said dryly.

"Christian, I'd prefer for you to come with me, but you can't. I need you here more, keeping things in order at Ismintis."

"You've already made up your mind, haven't you?" he said dejectedly.

I nodded and answered, "I need this."

He blew out a puff of exasperation. "No, what you need is an orgasm or five. But you can't have one yet, so you're leaving me instead. Damn it."

"I'm sorry, Christian," I told him. "You're right though, an orgasm would make me feel better."

"Ana..." he said in a warning tone.

I continued, ignoring his tone, "The doctor said no sex. He didn't say we couldn't... do other things."

He stared at me in silence for a moment. Then, before I could stop him, he got out his phone and made a call. Who the hell was he calling now?

"Dr. Perkins?" he asked. Holy shit, he had my surgeon on speed dial? "Christian Grey. Quick question? How soon after her surgery can Anastasia have an orgasm?" He listened intently for a few seconds, and then thanked the doctor before ending the call.

"Christian... did you just call my surgeon and ask him if I could have an orgasm?" I asked him dumbfoundedly.

He smiled at me evilly and answered, "Yes, I did." But he continued more seriously, "And no, you can't. Your pelvis is still too sore. I know from how you move around... you haven't had enough time to heal. He said that your pelvis contracts when you have an orgasm, so we needed to wait until you don't feel sore there anymore."

I nodded in resignation. "OK."

"Hey!" he said, putting his finger under my chin and lifting my face. "We'll make up for lost time when you're ready."

I sighed. "Do you still want me?" I finally asked the question that had been nagging at me all week.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Christian asked. Now he was the one who sounded dumbfounded.

"I'm scarred, Christian. I probably will carry some of these scars for the rest of my life, even after I've healed."

Christian stared at me as if I had two heads. Then, still without speaking, he ripped off his shirt. Holy shit! God, I wanted him.

"Ana, look at my chest, and tell me what you see," he demanded.

I took advantage of the moment to drink him in. My God, he was a fine specimen of man. "I see the sexiest man I've ever laid eyes on," I answered honestly.

He smirked for a moment before insisting, "Look closer. What else do you see?"

I did as he asked, and realized what he wanted. "Your scars? Is that what you're getting at?" I asked.

"Exactly," he answered. "Ana... have you forgotten so quickly? You're the only one. The only one who has EVER been able to touch me here." He took my hand and placed it on his chest, directly over his heart... and scars.

I began to cry, which made Christian tug me into his lap. He kissed my tears away and then nuzzled my neck. "Don't cry, Ana. And don't doubt my love for you. You are still the most beautiful woman in the universe. You're still the only one for me. Never doubt that, baby."

"Christian..." I had so many doubts I wanted to express, and I knew we needed to have this conversation, no matter how hard it was. "What if I'm never able to... you know..."

"What?" he asked, but I knew he knew what I was referring to. "Do you still want me, Ana? Are you still attracted to me?" What? Why was he asking that?

"Of course," I answered. "That's not the point."

"It's exactly the point," he insisted.

"But Christian," I pressed, "You're a Dom."

"Am I?" he asked innocently.

I sat up so I could see his face, and I'm sure he could see my confusion. "Why are you asking?"

"I've been talking a lot with Flynn this week about that, and I'm just not sure anymore," he confessed. "I mean, I'm a dominant man, there's no question there. But as for being a sexual Dominant... I just don't know. What I practiced before... what I learned from Elena? Was it healthy? Was it dominance? Or was it abuse? I honestly don't know."

"What are you saying, Christian?" I asked.

He responded with conviction, "What I'm saying is that I want you, Anastasia, and that isn't going to change. And what I'm saying, princess, is that we will figure out what works for us. If we figure out that we want a completely vanilla relationship, then I will love having that with you, because I love vanilla with you. And if we figure out that we want Dominance and submission, then we'll figure that out when the time comes. I know we will, Ana. You need to put these worries out of your head. I want you, Ana. I will always want you."

I curled myself into his lap and rested my head on his shoulder. After a few moments of basking in his comfort, I said, "I love you so much. But I still need to go to Hawaii."

"I know," Christian said.

"It's only for a few days," I reminded him.

"Just until Elliot and Kate's wedding?" he confirmed. I nodded, to which he replied, "OK, but only if you take security... and a nurse."

"Of course," I agreed. "I need to tell Prescott."

"And it's time that you meet De'Andre the Giant," he added.

"Who?" I asked.

"Your new CPO," he explained. He took out his phone again and called Taylor. "Tell Wesson we need him tomorrow. 8 a.m. sharp. And tell him to pack a bag. Ana's going to Hawaii."


	42. Ch 42: An Angry Tyrant Without Her (CPOV

**Chapter 42: An Angry Tyrant Without Her - Christian's POV**

Standing on the tarmac and watching Anastasia's plane depart the following afternoon was bittersweet. I knew she needed to get away and that the retreat she would have in Hawaii would be good for her, but damn, I was going to miss her. How was I ever going to get a night's sleep without her?

I still wasn't happy with the small quantity that Ana was eating, which I let her know at breakfast that morning. Gail had cooked her famous egg white omelette, which she'd filled with red and yellow peppers, great for Ana's recovery. Ana hadn't even eaten half of it. She insisted that she couldn't eat another bite. I was worried that she was losing weight. She needed to eat to regain her strength.

"Geez, Christian, I'm not even gone yet, and you're already acting like an angry tyrant," Ana quipped.

I whispered in her ear, so nobody else could hear, "Careful there, Princess. Even vanilla relationships can have spanking. And I'll be very happy to prove it to you when you're healthy enough and back from your trip." This brought a smile to my girl's face. She thought I was joking. I'd show her how serious I was when the time came if she didn't start eating more.

Christina was another story... that child ate like a horse, which I was delighted to see. She ate her bowl of oatmeal all by herself, which Ana praised her for. Christina responded to the praise by throwing her blueberries at Ana, which Ana surprised her by catching in her mouth. It was adorable. Both of them were so fucking adorable. Ana didn't realize what a wonderful mother she already was. She was going to be OK. She just needed time to heal, but then she was going to be OK. I could see how saying goodbye to Christina choked her up. Leaving hadn't been easy for her. I wish I could have convinced her to stay, but I knew she needed the time away for her own peace of mind. When she'd had the meltdown and destroyed the library, and then didn't even remember doing it, I knew that she needed to leave Seattle for a few days, for her own mental health.

I wasn't sure how she was going to receive her new CPO that I had Taylor hire for her. For one thing, he wasn't nicknamed "De'Andre the Giant" for nothing. He was at least six and a half feet tall, and he was built like a freight train. For another thing, he was from East Saint Louis, Illinois, and had the accent... and the street-smarts... to prove it. Taylor had vetted him very thoroughly, so I knew things about his background that he probably thought nobody knew, like the fact that he had been involved in a gang war when he was only nine years old. He'd been shot in the leg, and two of his brothers had been killed. He'd determined from then on to stay away from gangs, no matter what kind of shit people said about him. He'd graduated at the top of his class, and then gone straight into the Marines. Taylor knew some of his superiors, and according to them, he had a stellar reputation. Clean as a whistle and sharp as a tack. Yes, he'd do well for Ana.

Their introduction went off without a hitch. They both seemed respectful of the other. Time would tell how well they got along. The hitch, surprisingly, came with my own new CPO, which Ana had insisted that I hire. Taylor needed to go with Ana to Hawaii to vet local security for her house there... I insisted on having guards patrolling the property in addition to her two CPOs... so that left me with the new guy, whom I hadn't even met yet, until that morning. Nicholas Peres didn't look much older than fifteen or sixteen.

"How old are you?" was the first question I asked when Taylor introduced him.

"I'm twenty-five, sir," he answered. I considered asking to see his drivers license to verify, but that would have insulted Taylor's intelligence, since he'd been the one to hire this kid. However, I did spend the next half hour questioning him on his experience, which he actually seemed to have, despite his young age.

Finally, Taylor interrupted us. "Sir, do I need to remind you... Mr. Peres is only two and a half years younger than... you."

"I get it," Peres said. "It's the baby-face. I get carded everywhere I go."

"Carded for what?" I asked suspiciously. I didn't want an alcoholic or a gambler in my private security force.

"Last time... it was for a rated-R movie," he laughed. I didn't like this guy's informality. I didn't like this guy. But I didn't have much of a choice, since I needed Taylor in Hawaii more. Ryan was in charge of Christina now, and Reynolds was dead. All the rest of my staff were new, and they were all already assigned to other family members, which I didn't trust this guy to guard safely. I was stuck with him for the next day or two, until Taylor returned.

I had three other major tasks to take care of for Ana before she departed. First, I needed to talk her nurse into going with her to Hawaii, which I wasn't sure was even possible because I didn't know what other responsibilities Mrs. Alifo had in addition to Ana. Besides that, I needed to talk to Dad about that fucker Jose Rodriguez before I left to take Ana to the airport. And then, I needed to get rid of the fucking paparazzi who were constantly at the gate of Grey Manor.

Veronica Alifo turned out to be an easy person to convince. It turned out, Ana was her only patient at the moment. She spent the rest of her time helping her son run his restaurant. I recognized the name of the restaurant and knew the food there was decent. Mrs. Alifo was a good cook. She could make sure Ana ate properly. And she was more than willing to go, because she said that she had grown fond of Ana. I knew the feeling was mutual, so this was a major win.

Talking Dad into giving me Jose Rodriguez's work address turned out to be a much more difficult task.

"What are you planning to do, Christian?" Dad asked suspiciously.

"I'm not going to commit murder, if that's what you're afraid of, Dad," I assured him. "I just want to... shake him up a little. And I want to make sure he doesn't sell those fucking photos. She's been through enough, Dad. No more."

"I agree with you there, son, but I'm not convinced that your confronting Mr. Rodriguez is the best approach."

It took me over an hour to convince Dad to let me have the address. I had to swear an oath that I wouldn't touch a hair on the fucker's head. I also had to promise Dad that I would tell him every detail about the meeting afterwards. He still wasn't happy to share the information, but he knew I wouldn't give up until I got it.

That done, the last major task to accomplish before getting Ana to the airport was getting the fucking paparazzi off her tail. I used my own PR staff and GEH plane to help stage a fake departure. Even Kate helped plant the rumor that Ana was headed to Arizona... or New Mexico. Anyway, when we left, it appeared to anyone still watching that it was just me headed into work, like I did everyday. With the tinted windows in the back of the SUV, nobody could see Ana seated next to me.

Once Ana's plane was in the sky, I didn't waste another minute going to pay a visit to Jose fucking Rodriguez. When we pulled into the parking lot of McKinley Gallery, I instructed Peres to stay in the car.

"Is that the best idea, sir?" he questioned me.

"Excuse me?" I asked. Who the hell did this kid thing he was? What was Taylor thinking hiring someone who would question his boss's orders on the very first day on the job?

"Pardon me, sir, but it's just that... I gave Taylor my word that I wouldn't let you kill this bastard. Wouldn't blame you for wanting to. Sir. But I'm supposed to protect you from getting arrested. Taylor's words... if the boss ends up in the slammer, I'm fired."

It was almost funny, but I didn't have much of a sense of humor at the moment. "You will stay in the fucking car. If I am not back in twenty minutes, then you have permission to come looking for me."

"Yes, sir," he responded. He looked straight ahead, no eye contact. I liked this response better, except I felt like the kid was making fun of me. Damn it. I hoped it didn't take Taylor long to work out the security details in Hawaii and get his ass back here. At the very least, this kid needed some on-the-job training.

I expected to be greeted by a receptionist when I entered McKinley Gallery, but no such luck. The front reception area was deserted. There was mail in two piles on a desk, and it looked like someone had been interrupted in the process of going through it. There was an open can of diet soda next to an ancient desktop computer. The office was clean, but the furniture was cheap and uninviting.

At first, I wondered if I was at the wrong place, but I knew this was the address where Dad had sent the courier this morning, who reported that Rodriquez had personally signed for the letter. Dad hadn't wasted any time serving his ass. As I walked towards the hallway, I almost called out for someone, but before I had a chance, I heard voices coming from a back office.

A female voice was angry. "Jose, how could you? You took the pictures without her knowledge? And you never even told her? Then you lied to Playboy and told them you had her permission? Did I get all that correct?"

"When you put it all like that, it sounds..." he started, but she cut him off.

"It sounds low. Really fucking low. I didn't think you were the kind of person to do such a thing. I respected you. I helped you get this job because I thought you had a strong work ethic. But you've just blown all of that out of the water."

"I'm sorry, Shelly. I was... desperate. My career is going nowhere. I've got college loans that I can't pay. I'm about to be evicted from my apartment. I thought... if Playboy had bought my photos, it would have given me the boost I needed. And I honestly didn't think she'd care. She's into... kinky shit. And her picture is in all these other magazines. I thought maybe she'd welcome..."

"You can't be fucking serious!" the woman shouted. "She's Anastasia Steele, you idiot! She's one of the most powerful business leaders in the world, and you thought she'd welcome naked pictures of herself in Playboy? Are you really that stupid?"

"Hey, Playboy publishes some pretty good articles," he objected.

"Oh, my God!" the woman exclaimed. "You really are that stupid. And... on top of sending them photos of her... you had to choose the worst timing you possibly could! Didn't you know that she'd just been raped?"

"I didn't know," he answered. "I sent the email before I saw any news about that. It took some time for them to get back to me, and all the news about that came out in the meantime."

"And it didn't occur to you that you should call Playboy and let them know you'd made a mistake?" she asked incredulously.

He mumbled something but then said clearly, "I needed the money. I still need money."

I decided it was time to make my presence known. I walked to the open doorway and demanded, "How much?" I wanted to know what he'd thought they were going to pay him, not that I intended for the bastard to get a red cent.

Both of them were startled as they looked at me in alarm. And then I saw the alarm on the woman's face turn to shock. "Holy shit! You're Christian Grey!"

"Oh, shit," Jose muttered under his breath.

"Yes, and you are?" I asked the woman impatiently.

"I am Shelly Tang, and I run this... gallery. And this person here... I'm guessing he's why you're here. So... I'll just... leave you to it." She gave Jose one last look of disdain before she left the room.

We were in a small conference room, with just a cheap rectangular table and a few metal chairs. Both of them had been standing when I walked in, but after Shelly left, I took a seat at the table, sat back, and stared at the idiot.

"Jose Rodriguez," I spat, not as a question but more as a demand. "I have one question."

He stood there, paralyzed, staring at me in fear. Yes, fear was good. I hoped he pissed his pants. My Dom voice still came in handy, even if I wasn't a Dom anymore. He swallowed hard before he asked, trying to sound brave, "What would that be?"

"How do you sleep at night?" I asked. I continued to stare at him. Yes, this face had intimidated some of the strongest business leaders in the world. And it was doing the job now.

His eyebrows shot up. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"How do you sleep?" I repeated. "Knowing that you had a chance to be with one of the most powerful, most beautiful, most intelligent, most amazing women in the world? And she actually chose to be with you. And you... you couldn't even make her come. Is your dick really that pathetic, that you couldn't even bring her to orgasm, not even once? How do you live with yourself, being that pathetic? And even if your limp excuse for a dick was too small to get her off, you could have used your hands or tongue, you idiot, but you chose not to. You've got to be one of the most selfish pricks in the world."

"Hey... just a minute!" The little shit was getting defensive. "What's this about? What the hell did she tell you?"

"You selfish asshole, you didn't even try to satisfy her, but instead, you took advantage of her goodness, and you violated her trust by taking pictures of her while she slept. She slept in your bed... after getting you off... and you couldn't even meet her needs, but instead you violated her! You're just as bad as that fucking monster that raped her as he held a knife to her throat!"

Now he looked terrified. "I would never...!"

"But you DID!" I shouted, as I rose to my feet. "YOU VIOLATED HER!" I got in his face as I continued, "Tell me this... why didn't you ever tell her that you'd taken those photos of her?"

"I d...d...didn't think..." he stuttered.

"YOU DIDN'T THINK!" I shouted again as I slammed my fist on the table. I wanted to hit him, but I held back. I'd promised Dad. There would be no physical violence here today, no matter how badly I wanted to hurt this fucking moron.

"Sit down, Mr. Rodriguez," I demanded. He obeyed me without hesitation. "Let me do some thinking for you, since you're incapable of doing it yourself." I took the seat across from him and continued, "Number one, you are going to delete all of the images you have in your possession of Anastasia Steele. All of them. The nude ones as well as the clothed ones. I am a very powerful man, Mr. Rodriguez. I have resources that you can't even imagine. I will know if you held anything back."

"What if I..." he said in a challenging tone.

"Don't even think about it, you stupid shit," I interrupted. "No... do it. I dare you. I'd love to have a reason to end you, Mr. Rodriguez. It sounds like you don't have much of a career as it is. You won't be able to get a job bagging groceries at Safeway if you cross me."

The fear in his eyes showed that he believed me. "Fine. I'll do it," he muttered.

"See, you actually are capable of thinking. Second, you will hand over any printed photos you have of Anastasia Steele. Again, this includes not only the nude ones but all of them."

"How will you know...?" he tried to challenge me again.

"Mr. Rodriguez, you're forgetting to think again. I know you aren't accustomed to being around powerful people, and even when you had one as special as Anastasia Steele, you didn't even know what to do with her, but let me assure you, powerful people have resources that you cannot even imagine. Someone like you should NEVER try to cross someone like me. I'll end you before you can even take your next breath."

"Are you threatening my life, Mr. Grey?" he asked with a mixture of fear and threat.

"Why would I do anything so ridiculous?" I asked him tauntingly. "Your life is not worth threatening."

My words seem to shake him, and the stupid shit got teary-eyed. "I needed money," he told me with defeat.

I stared at him without an ounce of empathy. "So you tried to sell naked pictures of your ex-girlfriend to Playboy Magazine? Your ex-girlfriend, who happens to be one of the most powerful business minds in the world... and you didn't think she'd want to know about it first? Just how stupid can one person possibly be?"

"You're right... I should have told her," he admitted.

"Hell, you could have at least tried blackmail first. Although it wouldn't have turned out any better for you. But if you'd been nice about it, I might have bought them from you, just to prevent her the pain you've caused her."

"I wasn't trying to hurt her," he objected. "I didn't..."

"YOU DIDN'T THINK," I shouted again. "Yes, I know. You have shit for brains. I know. You thought that since she admitted to the country that she likes sex that she'd want to put herself on display for the whole country."

"It wasn't like that!" he insisted.

"Well, how the hell was it, then? You saw her interview with me, and you thought, 'hey, she's talking about sex, and I have sexy photos of her.' You thought she was your cash cow. But didn't you ever wonder why she always dresses the way she does, with her modest business suits, her hair pinned up, and those hideous glasses she used to always wear? Did you never stop to ask yourself what kind of image she wanted, and whether she'd want to show her body off to the world? And even if she did... should that not have been her own choice, not one for you to make for her?"

"I wasn't trying to..." he tried to say, but I stopped him.

"And you couldn't have chosen a worse time, you fucking moron. She was RAPED! Did you see it? Did you watch the fucking live-stream?"

"No!" he insisted. "I didn't know anything about that!"

"It's been all over the media for the past couple of weeks! How could you possibly have missed it?" I challenged him.

"No... I heard about it... after it happened. It's awful. I feel sorry for her. But I didn't have anything to do with it."

"But you still thought there was nothing wrong with selling her naked photos?" I asked him incredulously. "Right after a very brutal, very public rape?"

The asshole pretended to grow some balls, right there in front of me. "Just where do you get off, anyway? I saw what you did to that other girl. Are you telling me you don't do the same thing to Ana? I know she likes that kind of shit because she wanted me to do it to her, but I refused. You act so high and mighty just because you're rich, but you're not any better."

I was losing patience with this moron. "Except for one small detail," I replied with deathly calm. "Consent. What I do with my fiancee is none of your fucking business, but you can be sure that I have her consent in everything that we do. You, on the other hand, tried to publish photos without her consent. You invaded her privacy and betrayed her trust. You are worse than the scum on my shoes, Mr. Rodriguez. Now, I am a very busy man, and you're wasting my time here. I want those printed photographs. I want all digital photos deleted. And I want your word that you will never breathe the name Anastasia Steele again."

"And if I refuse?" he challenged.

"Then you're even stupider than you look," I answered. "You have 24 hours to deliver the photos to my office. Send them to GEH, to my attention, and mark the package as confidential. Google me for the address." I didn't wait for him to respond. I stood up and stalked out of the office. I made a mental note to text Ros and make sure she accepted the package for me.

When I passed the reception area, Ms. Tang was sorting through the pile of mail. She glanced up at me as I passed by. "Have a good day, Ms. Tang," I told her politely. She nodded at me in surprise.

As I exited, I bumped into my greenhorn CPO Peres. I guess it had been twenty minutes. "He's still breathing for now," I told him just before I ordered him to take me to Ismintis International.

In the car, on the way to Ismintis, I was surprised to get a phone call from Isaac. "It's my mom," he told me. "I'm really worried. She... never was a very good judge of character."

"What are you talking about, Isaac?" I asked. "What has she done to make you feel worried?"

"I heard her talking to Joseph," he told me. "There's only one Joseph who she'd be talking to in that... tone. Scared shitless. She's always been scared of him. Even when she divorced him, she was scared out of her mind. He's the reason she never remarried. She's too afraid of him. And throughout my life, whenever he showed up, she'd give him anything he wanted. He never did shit for either of us, but he took whatever he wanted from her."

"So... you think he's threatening her?" I asked.

"I know he is," Isaac told me. "I know he's into some heavy shit and that the FBI is investigating him. I think it's for human trafficking. I'm not sure what all they have on him so far, but... I know he's into that. And Mom knows more than you realize... And now I've said too much. Just... do something, OK?"

I shared Isaac's concerns with Dad and with my FBI contact, but beyond that, I wasn't sure what I could do. Besides, between communicating with Ros to keep up with everything happening at GEH and running Ismintis International for Ana, I was very fucking busy. Thankfully, it didn't take Taylor too long to sort out Ana's extra security, and he was back by the end of the second day, giving Peres the on-the-job training the kid needed.

Taylor's timing on his return couldn't have been better, because I fucking needed him here in Seattle. I was doing overtime at Ismintis, just as Ana had done before her attack, to make sure things ran smoothly. So far, I had made sure she hadn't lost a single deal. I was also communicating diligently with a couple of businesses in Addis Ababa because I knew how important getting into Ethiopia to start her schools was for Ana, and fucking Hyde had slowed that down for her. In the midst of all this work, there were employees at Ismintis who clearly didn't trust me, and I didn't trust them either. Were they loyal to Ana, and that was their issue, or was there more to it?

Amidst my suspicions, there were two Ismintis employees that I quickly began to rely on without wavering. Hannah Smith, Ana's PA, and Samantha Gilbert, who I began to think of as my own personal witch. I brought Andrea from GEH to continue assisting me, and together she and Hannah kept me updated on everything going on at any time, which in itself was a feat. The two of them got along well, and Andrea helped smooth things over with Hannah for me when I was direct and to the point. Yeah, angry tyrant. Whatever.

Samantha was the one I turned to when I suspected that certain employees were untrustworthy. The chick had a keen sense of discernment. Thanks to her intuition combined with my own, I ordered background checks on four different employees, followed by an internal audit, and I uncovered the beginnings of a conspiracy. They were working together to embezzle from Ismintis, but since I caught them so early, they hadn't had time to steal more than a few hundred dollars. I brought the scheme to Ana's attention, and then I fired their asses. Throughout this process, I grew more respectful of Samantha Gilbert.

I was busy, but not too busy for my girls. Every evening, I made it home in time to read Christina a story and tuck her into bed. And every night, I Skyped with Ana for an hour or two. She seemed to be doing well. She was continuing her therapy sessions with Dr. Patel via Skype, and she felt like they were making progress. Things seemed to be working out well with her security too, which made me feel relieved. She said that she had been taking daily walks on the beach, and I was glad that she was able to find the serenity that she needed there.

I also wasn't too busy for my therapy sessions. Flynn had suggested that we meet three times a week, and I had been diligent about keeping the appointments. I did it as much for Ana as for myself. I wanted to be healthy, and I wanted to help her get healthy. Flynn was amazed by the progress I was making. For the first time in years, I wanted to talk about my birth mother. We continued talking through my feelings of guilt over Leila, especially now that she was dead, and had died saving the life of my beloved. We talked extensively about my doubts regarding the lifestyle. Was I still a Dom? Was I ever really a Dom? I still didn't fucking know. Talking about all this with Flynn was exhausting, but I felt that I was gaining a better understanding, and I felt better about myself even with all the unanswered questions I still had.

I also hadn't been too busy to shop for a house for my family, and I found what I believed to be the perfect property. It was a large gated property between Hunt's Point and Kirkland, right on the shore of Lake Washington. The main house had eight bedrooms and nine and a half bathrooms. It already had a five-car garage, and there was room to add on if we needed it. Over the garage was a three-bedroom apartment. It also had a boat dock and boathouse. Best of all, it was already wired with a high-tech closed-circuit security system. Really, it was perfect. I knew I should ask Ana first, but I decided to surprise her with it. If she hated it, we could always sell it. Or give it to one of my siblings as a wedding gift.

Nights without Ana were miserable. She was right, I really was an angry tyrant without her. I couldn't fall asleep without her, and when I finally did, my dreamcatcher wasn't there to keep the nightmares away. I often found myself in the music room of Grey Manor in the middle of the night. Throughout my teenage years, I'd often ended up here when I couldn't sleep at night. At some point, Dad had gotten it soundproofed so it didn't disturb the rest of the family when I played the piano during the night.

So on my fourth night without Ana, I didn't think about the rest of the people sleeping in the house when I went into the music room and began to play. I found some sheet music on the piano that Mia must have left there. It was some modern pop music, which I didn't normally waste my time with, but the lyrics were good. They reminded me of Ana, of course. I looked at the cover. John Legend. I'd heard his name. I sight read the piece, and then played it through again. I recognized the tune from the radio. By the third time, I had it down, and I started singing it, thinking about Ana. When I got to the line, "Even when you're crying you're beautiful," my own eyes got teary. My girl had so much to cry about lately. I wanted to be able to dry her tears and protect her for the rest of our lives. I sang through the chorus as if I were singing the words directly to her, "All of me loves all of you..." When I sang about her perfect imperfections, I wasn't sure she had any. She'd probably think of her scars as imperfections, but they weren't. They were signs of her strength, of her survival. She was just as much a goddess, with or without scars.

I was startled to hear someone clapping as I finished the song. Once I'd memorized the song after playing it through three times, I'd been playing and singing with my eyes closed, so I didn't know until I looked up that my mom had been standing there listening to me.

"Sorry, Mom! I didn't mean to wake anyone," I told her.

"You didn't wake me, Christian. I was already awake, and I saw the light on in here. That was beautiful, son. I didn't know you could sing like that."

I thanked her, not wanting to make a big deal about my singing.

"You really miss her, don't you, dear," Mom said.

"More than you can imagine," I answered.

Mom had tears in her eyes when she confessed, "I wasn't sure you'd ever find someone to love like this, but I can't tell you how happy it makes me. Of all my children, I worried most about you. And I probably failed you most."

"Mom, you didn't fail me," I objected.

"I let that evil woman sink her claws into you. I'll never forgive myself for that, Christian," she said sadly.

"Mom... don't," I insisted. I really wanted to change the subject. Thinking about Elena was even more depressing, and I already felt depressed enough without Ana. I thought about the conversations I'd been having lately with Flynn, which were also just as depressing, but I felt like I was at a place now where I actually wanted answers to questions I'd never been willing to ask before. "Can I ask you something?" I asked Mom.

"You can ask me anything, darling," she answered.

"When I was little... I mean before you adopted me... What did you know about my life before? I mean when you were in the process of adopting me, were there things you found out about my birth mother? Besides her profession and drug habits?"

Grace nodded. "Wait here," she said. "I have something for you."

When she left the room, she was wiping her eyes. I didn't have long to wonder what she was getting, because she returned in just a couple of minutes. She sat down on the sofa and placed a shoebox on the coffee table before she motioned for me to sit next to her.

She started speaking as soon as I was seated. "Your dad and I decided when we adopted all three of you children that we would always answer any questions you asked us about your life before adoption, but that we wouldn't tell you unless you asked. Elliot and Mia both had questions when they were in their early teens. You... never did. Cary and I had more than one argument when you were in your teens, when you were acting out, getting into fights, because I wanted to go ahead and share this with you, even though you hadn't asked. I thought you were angry because you were trying to find yourself, and giving you this would help with that. Cary disagreed. He insisted that you had to ask first. It was what we'd agreed to. He was concerned that reminding you that you were adopted would make you feel even less like you belonged in our family, and we didn't want that. It was a very difficult decision for both of us to keep this from you until you asked."

"What is it, Mom?" I asked curiously. Her nervous behavior made me feel a little nervous.

She lifted the lid on the box and took out a framed photograph of a woman who looked to be in her late thirties and two teenage identical twin girls. I recognized them... at least one of them, but I didn't know which one. An older version of this face was on the bulletin board in my room. It was my birth mother.

Grace explained, "This woman is your grandmother, Elizabeth Carter. I met her at one of the hearings during the process of adopting you. When a child is in the foster care program, the state always tries first to reunite him or her with their family. If their parents are not an option, then the court looks for grandparents or aunts and uncles. They found your grandmother. She lived in Flint, or in a small town near Flint, but she drove down to Detroit for your hearing. Cary and I invited her for coffee afterwards. That was how we learned what happened to your mother, and your aunt."

"My birth mother," I corrected her. "She's one of these girls. I recognize her from the photo in my room."

"Yes, I put that there when you were little, thinking that you'd ask about her when you were ready."

"She had a twin?" I asked.

"Yes," Grace answered. She pointed to the one on the right. "This is Ella, your birth mother. I remember that because she's wearing blue. The other girl, wearing pink, is her identical twin sister, Evelyn. This picture was taken when the girls were in high school."

"Was there a... father? My grandfather?" I asked.

"He was killed in a skiing accident when the girls were younger. I think your grandmother said they were ten or eleven when it happened. Both of them had been very close to their father. None of them were the same after his death."

"Wow!" I said. "My birth mother had a family." I'd always pictured her as alone.

"She was loved," Grace agreed. "But when the girls were in high school, something terrible happened to your aunt Evelyn. I'm not sure about the details. It was difficult for your grandmother to talk about it. Whatever it was... your aunt never recovered. She started doing drugs and got addicted. She overdosed a few days before she was supposed to graduate from high school. Your mother never recovered from losing her twin."

"But... why would she start doing drugs herself if that's how she lost her sister?"

"Grief is a strange monster," Mom answered. "And also... your birth father might have had something to do with that."

"My... birth father?" I asked in shock. "You know who he was? Is?"

"Was," Mom corrected. "Your grandmother knew him. He was your mom's high school sweetheart. He apparently, in your grandmother's words, tried to help Ella cope. She didn't approve of his way of helping her cope."

"Drugs," I filled in.

"Drugs, alcohol, sex. Unprotected sex."

"Which is, of course, where I came into the picture," I said.

Grace nodded. "Yes, and shortly after she found out she was pregnant, she almost died, and so did you. They were driving drunk. Your birth father was killed, and everyone in the car that he hit head-on was killed. Ella was the only survivor. Well, other than you."

"What was his name?" I asked. "My father. What was his name?" I suddenly had to know. I'd always assumed he was a john who hadn't given a shit about her. But he'd been her high school sweetheart? This changed everything.

Mom looked in the shoe box and picked up another framed photograph. "Thomas Norwood. And you look a lot like him." She held out the picture for me to see.

"Holy shit," I muttered. He looked just like me. I had a birth father. Would he have loved me if he had lived to see me born? Would things have turned out differently?

"Christian, language," Mom reminded me.

Sorry, Mom," I replied. "So... Ella lost her father... then her twin... then her boyfriend... all within just a few years."

"The twin and boyfriend were just within a few months of each other. And she didn't recover at all from losing them. She... ran off to Detroit before you were born."

"And became a hooker," I added.

"No, Christian," Mom corrected. "Ella wasn't a hooker. You make it sound like she had a choice."

"Didn't she?" I asked. "Mom, I remember the pimp. The man who burned me. He was her pimp. And I remember hiding in the closet when we had... visitors. Male visitors."

Mom nodded. "I know, honey. That man... he was a loan shark. When you were an infant, Ella went to him to borrow money. He... to make a long story short, he seduced her. He got her hooked on crystal meth. And then he pimped her out."

"And... my grandmother told you all this?" I asked.

"Yes," Grace answered. "Your mom contacted her shortly after she met that man. But your grandma had her own... problems."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"She was an addict too, Christian. An alcoholic. It was why she couldn't take you. She told us that she wanted to, but she didn't think she would be able to care for you. Anyway, when Ella contacted her, she... basically told her she was on her own. She never forgave herself. When we met her, she blamed herself for Ella's death, and for forcing her into that lifestyle."

"Good God," I muttered.

"There's more, Christian," Grace warned me.

I glanced in the box before looking back at her face. "What do you mean?"

She followed my glance. "Yes, more in the box too, and I'll get to that, but I mean that there's still more to the story. Now that you're an adult, I think you can handle the whole thing. Your grandmother is still alive, Christian. She's in the state penitentiary in Michigan."

"What!?" I asked in shock.

"After your adoption... she found that man, the one who'd abused you and Ella. She killed him. Then she went straight to a police station and turned herself in."

"Holy shit!" I said again. This time, Mom didn't admonish me for my language. "My grandmother killed the pimp!?"

Grace nodded. "She did. She shot him at point blank range."

I wasn't sure what to say. I needed time to process all of this information. But Mom continued, "Christian, the other things in the box..." She picked up a stack of letters bound with a rubber band. "These are letters from your grandmother. I've been corresponding with her since you were little. I didn't learn about all this over coffee with her one afternoon. I learned it over a few years. She wrote a lot about your mom and aunt Evelyn, stories about things they did when they were growing up. She wrote about her love for your grandfather and what kind of man he was. He was a brilliant businessman too, so you come by it naturally. Your grandmother... has a way with words. She's a good story-teller. She even described the shooting in one of the letters... when she killed that man. I saved these for you, Christian."

I took the stack of letters from Mom and stared at them. I saw that the return address was indeed the Michigan state penitentiary. My God! I had a living blood relative, a grandmother. And she was serving a life sentence for killing, of all people, my tormentor, the man who had still been tormenting me in my nightmares for my whole life. There was something... freeing... in that knowledge.

Mom held up something else that she'd taken from the box. "She wanted you to have this too," Mom said. "It was her wedding and engagement rings. She said... you might want to give them to your bride. But I think you might be more likely to want to give them to Christina someday."

I opened the ring box and looked at the rings. The engagement ring was a classy and simple diamond solitaire. Both rings were yellow gold. Together, they were probably worth several hundred dollars, possibly even a thousand or two. My family hadn't been penniless like I'd assumed. Ella had come from a normal middle-class background, before tragedy had struck.

I looked at my mom and said, "Thank you."

"Your welcome, son," Grace said. "Are you OK? I know... it's a lot to process."

"Yeah, it is. But yes, I'm OK. I think I'm going to go up to my room now. Can I... keep this?" I motioned to the shoebox.

"Of course, Christian. These things are yours," Grace answered.

When I got to my room, I got into bed with the box, and I examined its contents again, beginning with the photographs. There were a few more inside that Grace hadn't gotten out, including one of my parents together, dressed in formal attire and smiling happily. High School Prom? It must have been. My mother was wearing a baby blue formal dress. Blue must have been her favorite color. My father was wearing a tuxedo with a blue bowtie the same color as my mother's dress. In another picture, she was wearing the same dress but standing next to her twin, who was wearing a gold dress. They were both beautiful.

I picked up the stack of letters and noticed that Mom had organized them chronologically, with the most recent on top. Elizabeth Carter had printed her name neatly before the address for the penitentiary, and I looked through the stack to see that they all looked exactly the same. This most recent letter was dated only a few months ago. All these years, they'd kept in touch, and I had no idea. Wow.

I decided to begin with the oldest, so I took the letter from the bottom of the pile dated when I was only five or six years old. But before I got very far, my phone rang. I glanced at the caller ID and saw that it was Ana. It was almost 4:00 a.m. in Seattle, which meant it was only 2:00 a.m. in Hawaii. Why was she calling in the middle of the night?

"Ana?" I answered.

She was crying. "Christian!" she wept my name.

I felt a stab of panic. "What happened!? Are you hurt?! Do I need to call 911?!"

"N..n..no. I... Are you OK, Christian? Oh, God! I need to see your face. Facetime me!" With that, she hung up on me.

I called her back immediately via Facetime. When she answered, and I saw her tears, it broke my heart. "Ana, what's going on?" I asked her. "Did somebody hurt you?"

She stared at me, examining my face carefully. "You're OK. You're OK. Thank God, you're OK."

"I'm OK, Ana. I'm more than OK. I mean, I miss you and can't sleep without you, but other than that I'm fine. What's going on, Princess?"

"I had a nightmare. An awful nightmare. He had you, Christian. He... hurt you."

"Shh..." I tried to comfort her. "I'm fine, Princess. He's dead. He's never going to hurt me or you again. It was just a nightmare. If there's anything I understand, it's nightmares. But it's going to be OK, my love. You're going to be OK."

"God, Christian, I need you. I need you here. There are so many things we need to talk about. Things I've decided over the past few days."

"Like what, Princess?" I asked. Since it was Friday... well, early Saturday morning now, I didn't need to go into work. I had planned to work on a few of Ana's deals from home, but I could do that on the airplane. If she wanted me there, I'd grow wings and fly there by myself if I had to.

She smiled, and even through her tears, it was the most beautiful sight I'd ever seen. "I'll email you a list," she said.

"You are so beautiful," I told her.

She snorted, which wasn't graceful but cute. "I'm snotty-faced and sleep deprived. Far from beautiful at the moment."

"You are still the most beautiful woman in the universe," I insisted.

She shook her head, but she was smiling. "How soon can you get to Hawaii?" she asked. "I wasn't joking, Christian. I really need you here. The wedding is only a few days away... so... do you think you can come early and go with me from here to Fiji?

"Absofuckinglutely," I answered. "The flight takes about five hours, right?" I asked.

"Maybe a little more," she answered.

"Then I'll be there in seven or eight hours," I told her. "I need to wake up my staff and pack a bag. I can hardly wait to see you, Princess. I have a lot to tell you too."

When we ended the call a few minutes later, I texted Taylor. "Go repack and tell the boy scout to pack. We're going to Hawaii."


	43. Ch 43: Conversation in the Hammock (APOV

**Chapter 43: The Conversation in the Hammock (Anastasia's POV)**

I hadn't wanted to end the call with Christian, but I knew he had things to do before getting on the plane, and I would see him in a few hours. I didn't even consider trying to go back to sleep. The nightmare had been too horrible, and I was still feeling its effects. If I were to lie down, I'm sure it would begin to replay in my mind. No, I had better things to focus my mind on.

I sat down on the bed and fluffed the pillows behind me before I picked up my laptop and began to compose my list. I hadn't been joking with Christian; I actually had a list already formulated in my mind of things I desperately needed to discuss with him. Life altering things. I knew that life as I had known it had already forever changed. The attack on my life had changed me, and I couldn't go back to being the Anastasia Steele that I had been before. Over the past few days, my Hawaiian retreat had given me the space and time I needed to prioritize my life. Christian was a huge part of it now, and I needed to run a few things past him. I needed him to agree to a few things, or at least to compromise with me.

#1: Family. I wanted one with Christian. Actually, I already had one with Christian and Christina, and I wanted more. Christian and I needed to finalize the plans for our wedding, and then as soon as we were married, I wanted to start trying to have a baby.

#2: Work. Ismintis International had been my entire life, and it was still very important to me, but my priorities were changing. I no longer cared about becoming more wealthy. I wanted to share my wealth and make the world a better place.

#3: Foundation. I had already been setting aside money to begin a charitable organization, but I had been too busy with Ismintis to put my plans into motion. I felt that now was the time to move ahead.

#4: Sex. I almost didn't add this one to the list, but I knew there were things Christian and I needed to discuss. Over the past day or two, I'd been getting my sex drive back, and then some. I was so horny, I wanted to masturbate, but I knew I'd be in trouble with Christian if I did, and I knew he'd find out. I was shocked at myself, because after what that evil bastard had done to me, I didn't think I'd ever want sex again, especially not the way I wanted it. But only with Christian. Only ever with Christian.

That was it. Once I had it written down, I realized how short my list was. I ended up emailing Christian just those four words: family, work, foundation, sex. I knew this cryptic email wouldn't make much sense to him, but I also knew we were going to talk about it as soon as he arrived.

I was napping in my hammock on my lower deck when Christian arrived later that afternoon, and I was awakened to the most pleasurable thing I'd felt all week: his lips on mine. The hammock was large enough for both of us, so I snuggled into his arms and returned his kiss.

"I missed you," he said when we finally ended the kiss.

"Me too," I responded. I wasn't sure how to communicate to him just how much I'd missed him.

"Never leave me again," he whispered in my ear before he nipped it between his teeth.

"I didn't leave you, Christian," I objected. "I just needed to get away. I thought you understood."

"I did," he assured me. "But I missed you." With that, he started kissing my neck.

"I need you," I told him. "Make love to me, Christian."

"Ana..." he said in a warning tone. "You're not ready yet."

"I am," I insisted. "I'm more than ready."

He placed his hand on my pelvis, and I hoped he was going to move it lower, but instead he pressed firmly.

"Ouch!" I cried out. "Why did you...?"

"You're not ready yet," Christian insisted. "You're still sore, Ana. I'll be damned if I give you a hernia instead of an orgasm."

I pouted. "But... I want you."

"Oh, baby," Christian said as he pulled me towards him and smelled my hair, "I want you too. So fucking much. And I'll have you. As soon as the doctor clears you, and not a minute sooner."

"Damn it!" I cursed. "It hasn't even been three full weeks yet, and the doctor said six weeks! I can't make it that long! And what about you? You're not injured, and you..." I stopped... and giggled as I felt his erection digging into my thigh. "You're hard," I observed.

He smirked at me. "I am," he admitted. He pumped his cock against me. "That's what you do to me."

"I can take care of that," I offered.

"No question about that," he agreed. "But no. I'm not going to come until you can."

I stared at him in confusion. "Why?" I asked. "Even if I can't come, I can suck you off."

He smiled at me, but then he grew serious. "No. Now stop it."

"But..." I objected.

"No," he insisted. "Now... I seem to recall a list that you wanted to discuss. That's what you called it anyway. Although... I'm not sure it's such a great idea to build a family or work on a foundation of sex. What the hell does that mean, anyway?"

I cracked up. "No, I agree... I didn't mean for it to be strung together into a sentence. They're each things I want to discuss with you."

Christian was beaming at me. "I love your giggle," he told me.

"I know," I replied. "We can start with sex if you'd like."

"As the foundation for family or work?" he asked teasingly.

"I know what you're doing," I told him.

"Good. Then you know that I'm serious, Ana. There will be no fucking. Of any kind. For either of us. Not until the doctor says so. After the doctor says OK, then we will make up for lost time."

"I'm so horny, Christian," I moaned.

"You can't come yet, Princess. You're still healing. You could slow down your recovery, and I want you to recover as quickly as possible. I can hardly wait to fuck you. But wait I will. I'm determined, Ana. Nothing you say or do will change my mind."

I blew out a breath of frustration. "Fine," I said. "Can we at least talk about fucking, even if you refuse to do it?"

"Of course we can talk about it," Christian replied. "There's nothing we can't talk about, babe."

"Yesterday, when I woke up, I felt... ready. Horny. I was surprised, because I thought it would take longer, after what happened. And Christian... you're not going to believe this... but I want it... the way we do it. I am craving our kinky fuckery. Big time craving it. I've almost gotten myself off a couple of times already, just thinking about it."

"You better not!" Christian warned.

"I know, I know," I assured him. "We may not have a contract any longer, but there are things we put in it that I'd never violate. I know how you feel about it. But... the point is, I want it. Already, after less than three weeks. I'm shocked at myself, but I can't help it. I want you, Christian. All of you. I want you to restrain me again. I want to sub for you again. I don't know when. Not right away, because I'm afraid. I... I trust you completely, so I think it will be OK. But I'm afraid it will be a trigger. I'm afraid I'll have a flashback. But I desire it. I desire you, not only as my lover, but as my Dom."

"Ana... I'm not even sure I am a Dom. I'm not sure I'm capable of doing that with you again."

"Why do you think that?" I asked him. "Of course you're a Dom, Christian. I don't understand why you're doubting it all of a sudden."

"Ana..." Christian began, but then stopped and sighed. He ran his fingers through his hair before he continued. "My introduction to the lifestyle was... rather unorthodox."

"There's nothing orthodox about the lifestyle, Christian," I insisted.

"Maybe not," he conceded. "But... what happened to me... and what I learned... it was abuse, Ana. BDSM is supposed to be safe, sane, and consensual. It wasn't any of those things for me, not with Elena, and not afterwards either."

"Christian, that's bullshit. The second part of what you said, I mean. I agree that there was nothing safe, sane, or consensual about bringing a 14-year-old child into the lifestyle. But what you did with those women after Elena... that was consensual, and safe and sane."

"Was it sane, Ana? I was punishing my birth mother." Christian looked miserable.

"Does it matter why you were into sadism? Your subs were into it too, clearly. And besides... none of that really matters anymore, does it? Because when we did it... you've admitted it yourself... you were never punishing her with me."

"You're right, I wasn't," he agreed. "But Ana... after what that monster did to you...? Are you sure...?

"Christian, I want YOU, and you are no monster," I told him adamantly. "There is absolutely no comparison. I love you. I desire you. But I agree... I'm not ready for it... yet. I have no idea how I'm going to react at first. There are some things... we probably shouldn't even consider." I shuddered before I added, "Like the spanking bench."

He raised his head so he could see my face better. "Is that where he...?"

I nodded my head, blinking away tears. "You obviously didn't watch the video of it... or read any of the shit on the Internet about it. You'd already know that if you had."

"I promised you, Ana. And Taylor... protected me from the media. But... you weren't supposed to see any of that either, so how do you know?"

"I stupidly got on Twitter one day. It only took about five minutes. I haven't looked at any social media since then. Anyway, that's not the point. There are some things... we just don't need to do. Anything that will remind us," I told him.

"Like the Saint Andrews Cross," Christian said as he also shuddered.

I didn't say anything, but I just snuggled closer to him and closed my eyes for a few moments, just finding comfort in his presence.

"We don't need those things, Princess," Christian assured me. "I don't know if I'm a Dom, but if you want to play, we can role play. When the time comes, we will figure it out. I can spank you just fine by laying you across my knee and using my hand. And if you want to be restrained... we can improvise."

"I like improvising," I said.

"Me too," Christian agreed. "So... family?

I smiled into his chest and answered, "Family. I want to marry you."

He chuckled. "Well, it's a good thing your dad gave me his blessing then," he replied.

"He did? Really?" I was shocked. I thought Ray hated Christian.

"Yep," Christian answered proudly. Just a few days ago. It was my third lunch with him. I told you that the first two went well, but I didn't tell you how he grilled me, especially that first time. And he still gave me those looks he thought I didn't notice. But he was more relaxed by the second one. And when we went out for our third lunch, he finally said something he'd been wanting to say all along. Well... at least since he'd finally started trusting me. He said, 'Let me give you a piece of advice, son. If you want a girl's dad to like you, then you really ought to ask for her hand before you decide to up and marry her.'"

I was surprised, and I couldn't stop the giggle that escaped my lips. "Oh my God! Dad said that to you!?"

Christian sighed and said, "I really need to record you giggling, so I can listen to it when I'm stressed out at work. Yes, he said it, and I responded with a sincere apology... followed by a request for your hand."

"My God, that's so old fashioned. It never even occurred to me that he'd expect that."

"Yeah, well, maybe he wouldn't have if it hadn't been for all the shit he'd heard about me. He wanted to be sure I was good enough for you. I assured him that I wasn't good enough for you, but that nobody would ever love you more than I do."

I snuggled closer to him. "What did he say?" I asked.

"He said that was good enough for him," Christian replied. "He welcomed me to the family."

"That's good. So I guess I don't need to worry about Ray refusing to walk me down the aisle." I felt more relieved about that than I let on.

"No need to worry," Christian assured me. "We're getting married, Anastasia."

"Good, because I REALLY want to marry you, Christian. And I want to have more children. I want to get my IUD removed right after we're married, and I want to start trying to have more kids right away. Christina will be two years old in April. That means if we get pregnant right away, she'll be close to three when the baby is born. That's good. I want her to have a little brother or sister close to her own age."

Christian kissed my head and stroked my back. "Yes," he said. "I want that too, Princess. I want a whole houseful of children."

"Really?" I asked.

"Really," he answered. "Why does that surprise you?"

"Because... I just thought... you'd want to wait a few years. But I don't want to wait."

Christian was quiet for a moment. He seemed to be pondering. "Honestly, if it weren't for Christina, I'm not sure I'd be ready. But she's changed me. I love being a dad. I never thought I would. And now... I can hardly wait to see your belly grow with my child. I want that, Anastasia."

"But... a whole houseful? How many is that?"

"Oh, I don't know. Nine or ten?" his voice sounded serious. What the hell? I raised my head up so I could see his face, and he looked serious. But then, just as I was about to piss myself, he laughed and said, "Gotcha!"

Without thinking, I started tickling him. "You! You want me to give birth to nine or ten kids!"

Christian instantly grabbed my hands and held them over my head. His face looked shocked. "Holy shit!" he muttered.

It took me a moment to realize what was wrong. "I'm sorry," I apologized for touching him like that. "I forgot..."

"Don't apologize!" he insisted. "Ana... that was... wow!" He didn't release my hands but continued to stare into my eyes in shock.

"Are you OK?" I asked him.

"More than OK," he answered, and then he finally released my hands. "Sorry, I just... reacted. But Ana... that was the first time anyone's ever tickled me. I used to watch Elliot and Mia, when we were kids. And I was jealous, because it looked fun. But I... couldn't. But you... you fucking tickled me. And I liked it."

"So... you want me to do it again?" I asked tentatively.

He smiled but shook his head. "No fucking way. Not right now. I already have a hard-on the size of Alaska, and I've told you, I'm determined to wait until the doctor clears you. And Ana... that fucking turned me on. I almost came in my pants."

I giggled. "Really?"

"Really," he replied.

"Be serious for a minute," I said. "How many kids do you really want to have?"

He sighed contentedly. "I don't know. I don't care. As many as we can. How many do you want?" he asked.

"Two or three," I answered.

"Two or three sounds good," he responded. "You do mean in addition to Christina, right?"

"Right," I answered.

"Good," he said. "So... that's settled. We'll start trying to have babies as soon as we're married. So, let's get married soon, OK?"

"Yes, I want that too, but we've hardly had any time to plan a wedding."

"What's there to plan. Let's just do it. Hell, we could get married here in Hawaii. I can make all the arrangements, and we can do it before we leave for Fiji."

I considered that for a moment. "No way," I answered. "I'm not getting married until I can fuck you on our wedding night."

Christian laughed. "Did you really just say that? It sounds like something I would say."

I smiled at him, but I didn't reply. Instead, I said, "We'd agreed to four months, and that was about a month ago. So that leaves three months. We can plan a wedding in that amount of time."

"It's too long. I want to be married now," Christian pouted.

"But I want to have a wedding," I insisted. "Besides, three months will pass before you know it."

Christian sighed. "If you say so," he said.

I sighed. "I say so." I paused a minute or two before I continued with the next item on the list. "Christian, I want to merge with you."

"Anastasia, so help me God, if you keep trying to get me to fuck you, I'm going to start keeping count, and that's how many delayed orgasms you're going to get. You want a Dom, you'll get one, Princess."

I giggled at him. "As much as I want to fuck, that wasn't what I was referring to. I meant I want our companies to merge. I want you to keep running Ismintis... and GEH."

"Ana... no," Christian replied firmly. "I told you when we agreed for me to do this for you that I have no intention of taking you over. I've done my best to make that clear to all your employees. Now, I can't just... take you over. Ismintis is your life, sweetheart. You've done an amazing thing with it. You are brilliant, and Ismintis is the product of your brilliance. I know it's going to take you some time to recover and come back, but I've got your back in the meantime."

"You're not hearing me," I told him. "I want us to merge. I don't mean I want you to take me over. I mean, I want our two companies to merge into one company. I want us to become Ismintis-Grey International."

Christian sat up and stared at me in shock. "You're serious. You want to change the name...? You want GEH to become Ismintis-Grey?"

I shook my head. "No... I want GEH and Ismintis International to become Ismintis-Grey International."

Christian continued to stare at me. "And... you want me to be CEO," he stated.

"Yes," I answered. "I want to take a more extended leave of absence. Have babies. And run our foundation."

"Our foundation?" he asked.

"The Christian and Anastasia Grey Foundation," I announced.

His eyes got just a bit wider, and then he grinned broadly. "Anastasia Grey?" he asked hopefully.

I nodded. "Mrs. Anastasia Grey," I confirmed.

He responded by kissing me passionately. "I just might fuck you for that," he whispered.

"Yes, please," I replied before I deepened the kiss.

Christian pulled away after a minute or two. "No," he insisted. "You have to heal first."

"I'm healing just fine," I insisted.

"Good," he responded. "Then you'll be good and ready as soon as your doctor says it's OK."

I sighed. "OK. So... what do you think... about merging our companies... if we can't merge our bodies... yet?"

Christian studied my face for a moment before asking, "Was it your idea of compromise? Changing your name... if I'd agree to change the name of the company to Ismintis-Grey?"

His question shouldn't have come as a surprise. "Not exactly," I answered honestly. "I didn't think about compromising, at least not about that. I just... wouldn't have a good reason for keeping my name if we merge our companies. As things are now, Anastasia Steele is a commodity. One that people immediately associate with Ismintis International, for good reason. But if we become Ismintis-Grey, then I won't need to be concerned. Both of us would be Ismintis, and both of us would be Grey." I shrugged my shoulders as if it were a no-brainer, but I knew damn well that things were not this simple. GEH had merged with dozens of companies in the past few years, and never had Christian even considered keeping the names of any of those companies. But I had followed suit, also merging with numerous companies but never changing the name of Ismintis International. The name of my company was just too important to me. It was a tribute to my grandmother, and I needed to keep it. I hoped Christian would agree, but I knew I was pushing him for something he would never have otherwise considered.

Christian studied my face as if I were a science experiment. He was quiet for so long that I began to get worried, especially as I could almost see the gears turning in his head. But finally he spoke. "Ok, let's do it," he said.

I was shocked. I expected a negotiation, not for him to agree with no discussion. I expected him to ask me why I insisted on keeping the name Ismintis, and I especially expected a negative reaction to the idea of putting the name Ismintis before the name Grey. I was certain that Christian would insist on Grey-Ismintis instead, but this wasn't what I wanted. "Just like that?" I asked. "Don't you want to..."

"No, Princess, I don't need to discuss it. Just like that. Let's do it. Ismintis-Grey International. It makes sense. And Mrs. Grey... that makes even better sense."

"Christian, I told you... it wasn't a compromise. You don't have to agree to change the name of our company just to get me to change my name to Grey. I saw how hurt you were when I told you I wanted to keep my maiden name. It was only for professional reasons, so I'm trying to eliminate..."

"I get it, Anastasia," Christian interrupted. "And that's not why I'm agreeing. I'm agreeing because it's important to you... and to me too... to keep the name Ismintis. Wisdom. It's a good name, Anastasia. Ismintis-Grey has to be our new name. Anything else would communicate to the world that I took you over. Hell no. They already see you as a victim, and they see me as a monster, and if we were to merge and lose the name of your company, what would that communicate? You're my victim. Your entire company would be seen as the victim of big bad GEH, and with the timing of your attack and my seeming to come to your rescue by running Ismintis... I'd be labelled a villain, and it would take years to overcome the stigma. Hell, it's already going to take a long time to improve my name as it is, but... this will help. It will make a whole hell of a difference."

"Christian, don't you think you're taking that a bit too far?" I suggested.

"No, I don't," Christian insisted. "And neither do you. Be honest with yourself, Anastasia. Part of the reason you want Ismintis to come before Grey in our name is because you don't want the world to keep seeing you as a victim but as the world leader that you are. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get you back there, where you belong. This is a win-win for both of us.

"But... I'm not sure you heard me, Christian. I don't want to be in charge of Ismintis any longer. I want to take a leave of absence. A long one."

"Leave of absence, not resignation," Christian pointed out my choice of words.

"Right," I agreed. "You're right. I'm not ready to completely resign. I... don't think that would communicate... what I need to communicate."

"I know," Christian said. "You're not a quitter. And you're not a victim either. You're a badass, just like Luke Sawyer said."

"But... I still want you to be in charge," I insisted.

"Ana... the ONLY way I'll agree to this merger is if you agree to be the co-CEO. You can take your leave. Take as long as you want. But eventually, you're going to want to come back. And I'm going to want you to." Christian was adamant, but he didn't understand.

"I'm not so sure about that, Christian," I told him. "I really want to run our foundation. I've made enough money. I'm a very wealthy woman, and I want to use my wealth to make the world a better place."

"Don't you mean that WE are very wealthy, and WE want to use OUR wealth to make the world a better place," Christian corrected.

"Do I mean that?" I asked him honestly. "Is that what you want too?"

"Absofuckinglutely," he answered without hesitation. "We are mega wealthy. We are the next Bill and Melinda Gates. I want to change the world, Anastasia. I want to eliminate world hunger. I want to... help boys like me."

I smiled at him hopefully. "So... you're totally on board with the Christian and Anastasia Grey Foundation."

"Totally on board, Princess," he assured me. "In fact... I insist on helping you run it. I want us to be partners in everything, Anastasia."

I nodded tearfully. "I'd like that," I responded.

"Good," he said as he lay back down in the hammock and pulled me closer. "Now... I have something to discuss with you too. I've just learned something... life altering. I have a grandmother. My maternal grandmother is still alive, Ana. And when I was little, after my birth mother died, my grandmother killed the pimp. She's in prison now for killing my tormenter, Anastasia. And I want to go visit her."


	44. Ch 44: Relaxation in Hawaii (CPOV)

**Chapter 44: Relaxation in Hawaii (Christian's POV)**

Anastasia and I spent the next few days just relaxing and talking. She tried multiple ways to get me to fuck her, but when I started counting each occurrence and promised a delayed orgasm for each one, she finally rolled her eyes and gave up. I was tempted to promise her a punishment for the eye roll, but I was afraid the additional threat of punishment would turn her own even more. She'd made it blatantly clear that she wanted to sub for me again, and she was hornier than hell already, so I didn't want to encourage that. She absolutely had to wait until the doctor cleared her.

Besides, I still didn't know how I felt about the lifestyle. I wasn't sure I could truly dominate her when it came down to it. I hadn't seen the video of her rape, but my mind had invented enough of the horrors that fucking Hyde had put her through, and I was afraid those scenes that had haunted me in my most recent nightmares would be repeated in my mind if I attempted to be her Dom. I knew there was no fucking way I could ever go near a Saint Andrews Cross again, and even though I didn't see her strapped to the spanking bench, now that I knew what he'd done to her there, I couldn't go near one of those either. This meant that Anastasia and I would not be going to any play parties again, and we would not have a playroom in our new house. I wasn't bothered by this realization, but I wasn't sure how Ana was going to feel about it. And I purposefully didn't talk with her about it during those days of relaxation in Hawaii, because I needed to keep her mind off sex, as much as possible. It wasn't easy because my girl is beautiful, and... did I mention, she was horny as hell? I wanted her more than ever, but I was determined to wait.

We spent the time talking about so many fucking things, but most of it related to her list. We discussed school plans for Christina... what we'd do when she got old enough. We also made plans to hire a live-in nanny for her, and we discussed what that person's job duties would entail. We agreed that we didn't want our kids to be raised by nannies, but that we would need staff not only to ensure their safety but also for logistical reasons, since both of us would likely be busy with our company and/or our foundation. We were both convinced that we could balance family, work, and philanthropy.

After further consideration about our merger, I convinced Anastasia that we should rebrand as "Ismintis-Grey Enterprises." I felt that the word "International" was redundant, since the world knew we were everywhere, and it would be better to specify the country or city branch instead. In other words, GEH-Paris would become Ismintis-Grey Enterprises - Paris, while Ana's office in London would be rebranded from Ismintis International to Ismintis-Grey Enterprises - London. Ana wholeheartedly agreed with me, and she also convinced me that we didn't need "Holdings" to be part of our name since GEH had become much more than my original vision had been... I had branched out from just mergers and acquisitions long ago. We were inventing new technology to use in the third world. We were even researching genetically modified food to try to increase production, all a part of my dream of ending world hunger. Anastasia was right, we were much more than a holdings enterprise. It was already true for GEH, and it would certainly be true for Ismintis-Grey Enterprises.

When we discussed how we would rebrand, Anastasia was adamant that we not use our new initials, IGE. I understood how important the name Ismintis was to her, so I didn't argue with her, even though I thought IGE would catch on better. I was surprised that she was just as adamant about not using the initials CAG for our foundation. She insisted that it be called the full name "Christian and Anastasia Grey Foundation," and that if it were shortened, it would be "Grey Foundation." I wasn't OK with that though, because I wanted to hear her name. I knew if people just said "Grey," they would mean me. It would take time for them to start thinking of her as Grey. The reminder in the name of our foundation was just what I wanted. So what if it was a mouthful? People who received money from us wouldn't complain.

We spent quite a bit of time discussing the details of how the merger was going to work. The offices most affected were, of course, our headquarters in Seattle. GEH employed 347 people, while Ismintis employed almost that many, at 323. My building was 28 stories in the heart of downtown Seattle, and Ismintis International was only a few blocks away in a slightly smaller building, with 25 stories, but each floor had a bit more square footage than my building did. We had to determine whether to move all of the operations for one of us into the other's building, to keep operations for our blended companies in two different buildings, or to build a new headquarters. We realized quickly that we were both too big to move into one of our already existing buildings, and we didn't want to downsize. We would either need to do a massive addition to one of our buildings, keep them as they were and continue to operate out of both, or move both of our companies into a new building. We were both inclined to build a new headquarters, but we realized the timetable for such an undertaking would be several months, or even years.

As far as our staff went, Ana thought it was a good thing she had been turned down by the person she'd asked to consider being her COO, apparently someone from Google who will remain nameless. We agreed that Rosalind Bailey would be an excellent COO for Ismintis-Grey. In fact, I expected that Ros would not be a bit surprised by our merger. She'd seen in coming for a few weeks now and had even hinted at it.

We each had CFOs, and we weren't sure which one of them should continue in that position in Ismintis-Grey. Over the past new months, Ros had had more than one argument with my CFO, Jasper Carrington. I was meticulous about checking his work, and he did good work. I didn't have any issues with him myself, but I wasn't sure what the deal was between him and Ros. I was inclined to believe that it was just a matter of clashing personalities. Anastasia's CFO, Ramona Sotomayor was also hardworking and a strong leader, but Ana had her own doubts about her, mainly because Sotomayor had been the one to hire the employees that I'd recently fired because they'd been attempting to embezzle money from Ismintis. We decided to do a bit more investigating before making a decision about which one to keep as CFO. We agreed that barring any unforeseen reasons to get rid of the other one, we'd keep them on as second in command over Finance. We'd blend the rest of our financial departments.

And so it went, as we talked through each of our departments. Ana felt strongly that Samantha Gilbert should be in charge of IT, and I had to agree with her. Even though Barney was invaluable, he paled in comparison to my personal witch. I agreed with Ana that he would be second in command in that department.

When we got to the topic of our security staff, we easily agreed that Taylor should be in charge. Perhaps Ana would have objected if Luke Sawyer weren't out of commission for the next few months, but I knew she liked Taylor and trusted his expertise. He'd done a great job hiring Ana's newest CPO, Wesson.

"I think Dre likes Sam," Ana surprised me by saying when we were on the topic of her security."

"Who?" I asked dumbly.

"Dre," she answered. "De'Andre."

"Ah, Wesson. And who the hell is Sam?" I had to ask.

"Samantha Prescott. God, Christian, do you have any staff that you call by their given names?"

"Sure," I responded. "Andrea. Now Hannah, but she yours. Samantha Gilbert, but she yours too. Barney. Ros."

Ana giggled, and that sound made it perfectly OK that she was making fun of me. "Five people, and two of them are my employees. Well, ours now, as soon as we merge."

"And your point is...?" I asked with a smirk.

"You're so formal," she responded.

"I like to keep a certain... level of respect... over my staff," I explained.

"Yeah, I know," Ana said, grinning at me. "I've noticed."

"But you clearly don't approve," I pointed out.

"Do you need my approval?" she asked me. Did I need her approval? Hell, yes.

"Yes, Goddess, I need your approval," I answered. That was clearly the wrong thing to say, as I could see her getting turned on. Shit, I thought she wanted a Dom, not to be one. I guess it didn't matter; any talk like that did it for her. I needed to change the direction of this quickly. "Anyway... what do you mean, you think Dre likes Sam?"

"Oh, that," Ana remembered. "Actually, I think she likes him too, but she's not going to admit it anytime soon. She's so... professional. I like her. I really like her a lot."

"What about Wesson?" I asked. "Do you like him?"

"Dre?" she asked with a smirk. "Come on, Christian, let me hear you say it. Dre. Not just his given name, but even a shortened form of his given name."

I really didn't give a fuck what the fucker's name was. I just needed to know that he was doing a good job and got along well with Ana. "Do you like Dre?" I asked to humor her.

"Good job, Christian," Ana praised me. "See, that wasn't painful at all. And to answer your question, yes, I do. He has a great sense of humor, but he also knows when to take charge. There was an issue with a couple of the guards that Taylor hired when we first arrived, and Dre straightened it out in just a couple of minutes. I think he's going to work out just fine." Her words gave me cause for both relief and concern. While I was glad she liked Wesson, I was concerned that he was getting too familiar with her, and I was also concerned that they'd had issues with the local security that we'd hired.

"What kind of issue did you have with the guards?" I asked.

Ana sighed, but she smiled teasingly at me as she answered, "I said Dre straightened it out, so you don't really need to concern yourself with it.

I let it go, but later, I instructed Taylor to question Wesson to find out what had happened.

Ana and I agreed that even though we didn't want to downsize when we merged our companies, there would inevitably be some employees who just didn't work out, or would need to be reassigned, as we blended our staff. Since we were starting a foundation which would also need staff to run it, we hoped that we would be able to keep most of them. We wanted to keep employing as many people as possible. We realized that once we merged, we would employ even more people in Seattle than Amazon. We envisioned growing, so that in a few years time, we might employ over 1,000 people in the greater Seattle area. This, of course, did not account for our offices worldwide, where we wanted to grow even more.

When Anastasia grew exhausted from all of our talk of business, we napped in the hammock, my favorite place in Hawaii. I looked forward to making love with her here, in this hammock. It wouldn't happen on this trip, but we would return here, hopefully in the not too distant future. My girl was still not eating properly, and I could see that she'd lost weight. I was worried, but she insisted that she just couldn't eat. She wasn't hungry, and in fact felt nauseated much of the time. I suggested that she see a local physician, but since Mrs. Alifo was there, checking Ana's vitals several times a day, checking her wounds that hadn't already healed, making sure she took her meds, and forcing her to eat at least a little, Ana insisted that she didn't need to see a doctor yet. She already had an appointment with her doctor in Seattle as soon as we returned from Fiji.

Whenever Ana was napping, I was working. I continued to stay abreast of everything going on both at GEH and at Ismintis. I relied heavily on both Andrea and Hannah to keep me updated on everything, and I communicated closely with the Ismintis executive staff. Ros was really the only person at GEH that I felt I needed to stay in close contact with, and I exchanged several emails with her each day. I spent hours responding to various emails and reading over contracts and spreadsheets. Both companies were doing exceedingly well; nevertheless, I knew the merger would be a good thing for both of us. I didn't mention it to anyone yet. Ana and I would need to do that together, and not until we were both back in Seattle.

We decided to leave for Fiji shortly after breakfast on my third day in Hawaii. This would give us enough time to settle in to our room at the resort that Kate had rented before the rest of the group arrived. I was worried about Ana and how she was going to hold up under the pressure of all the pre-wedding festivities and the wedding celebration itself. She promised me that she would take it easy, and that she wouldn't push herself to keep up with Kate.

Just as we were finishing breakfast and about to leave for the airport, Taylor approached, clearing his throat in his usual manner to get my attention.

"Sir, your father needs you to call him. He says it's important."

I realized, too late, that I'd left my cell phone charging in our bedroom before coming down for breakfast, and I hadn't gone back to retrieve it yet. Ana and I walked to our bedroom together, and I called Dad as soon as we got there. Ana grabbed her laptop and disappeared, giving me some privacy even though I didn't feel I needed it.

"Christian, are you sitting down?" Dad asked after he answered my call.

"Umm... this doesn't sound good. What's going on, Dad?" I asked hesitantly.

"Well, several things actually, but I'll start with the most... umm... shocking. Terrible, actually. It's about Brenda, Isaac's mother. You know that he was concerned about her safety, and it turns out he had good reason to be. She was beaten... almost to death last night. She's in the ICU at Virginia Mason, and they aren't expecting her to make it. She's basically brain dead, Christian."

"My God, Dad! How's Isaac? Holy shit, he told me he was afraid of this. God, I let him down! He must hate me now!"

"Isaac doesn't hate you, son," Dad assured me. "He doesn't blame anyone for this except the bastard that did it."

"Horowitz," I muttered.

Dad agreed. "It's evident that Joseph Horowitz attacked his ex-wife, but I'm not sure whether the police have enough evidence yet to arrest him for it. The FBI already had him in for questioning regarding the other issues they've been investigating. Sex trafficking of minors, among other things. He was indicted, but then released on bail. As soon as he was released, Brenda was beaten nearly to death. I have it on good authority that she'd been questioned by the FBI, and she was... very forthcoming with her knowledge of his activities. So, do I think her attack right after his release is a coincidence? I don't think so. The question is whether or not it can be proven. And I'm not a prosecutor, son, and I haven't been able to find out yet from my connections in the prosecutor's office if they have enough evidence to charge him with her attempted murder, or murder if things go the way they seem to be headed. At the moment, though, there's an even bigger problem. Horowitz has disappeared. He most likely left the country."

"Shit!" I exclaimed.

"So..." Dad continued, "I'm going to ask you for something I normally wouldn't, son. But this feels personal, because I've come to look at Isaac... like one of you. One of my kids, I mean. I want you to use your connections to find the bastard. I want him to pay for what he's done."

"What are you saying, Dad?" I asked. Did my dad want me to hire a hitman? Not my dad. No, he'd never...

"I want him prosecuted, Christian," Dad stressed. "I want him to spend the rest of his sorry excuse for a life in prison."

"I'll do what I can, Dad," I promised. "So... what about Isaac? Where is he now?"

Dad answered, "Your mom and I have... We're acting as his foster parents now."

"Really?" I was surprised. "I didn't know that you and Mom were still qualified for fostering."

"We weren't until... recently. Just a few months ago, actually, we decided that now that you kids were all grown up, we wanted to foster again. Not babies, of course, not at our age, but there are so many older children in the system. Grace meets so many of them at Coping Together. She talked me into getting re-certified, which only took a few weeks. But then... when we found out about... what happened with Elena Lincoln, and how we failed you... we decided to put it off."

"Dad, you didn't fail me," I insisted.

"We did, son, and we'll regret it for the rest of our lives. But I've realized something in the past few hours. God has given us a second chance. Isaac is so much like you, Christian, to the degree that he was even molested by the same predator. We have a chance to help him through this traumatic event, which compounded with what he's already suffered, is more than any child should ever dream of suffering."

"Is he meeting with Flynn?" I asked. "I'll pay for his sessions, Dad. Unlimited sessions."

"Thanks, son. It's not necessary... I mean not necessary for you to pay. The sessions are necessary, but you know that your mom and I can afford them. Yes, he's meeting with Dr. Flynn. They were already having weekly sessions, but now that this has happened, I've asked John to increase their time to three days per week, at least for the next couple of weeks. We'll see from there what needs to happen next. I don't want to push Isaac into sessions he doesn't want, but at the moment, he wants them. I'm trying my best not to make the same mistakes with him that I made with you."

I felt awkward saying what I felt I needed to say, but I said it anyway. "Dad... just...remember, OK... Isaac isn't me. He's different from me in so many ways, and I hope you can see that. I was so fucked up when I was his age."

"You think he's not fucked up, Christian?" Dad asked. I was shocked. I expected Dad to reprimand me for my language, not to repeat the same words. "I agree though, he's not you. I said he's like you, not that I'm confusing him with you. But thanks for the reminder, son. I'll try to remember not to hold him up to your standards." Dad was being completely sincere, without an ounce of sarcasm.

"Hold him up to my standards? Seriously, Dad?" I asked dumbfoundedly. "I dropped out of Harvard, remember?"

"You got into Harvard," he reminded me. "And after you dropped out, you started what quickly became a multi-billion dollar company. You are a genius, Christian. Never believe that your mother or I see you as anything less."

I was so shocked by his words that I couldn't speak. I'm sure my jaw was on the floor.

Dad took my silence as an invitation to continue. "Isaac isn't you, Christian, but he's fucked up in other ways. He's felt rejected by his father his entire life, and his mother has made many questionable decisions. From a young age, Isaac was exposed to Brenda's bad decisions. Then, he was molested by Elena Lincoln, and he accidentally killed her. He has that to live with for the rest of his life. Now, his mother, who's the only person he's had in his life to love him until now, is barely holding onto life in the ICU, and will probably be dead in the next few hours. That's pretty fucked up, wouldn't you say, son?"

"None of those things are his fault," I reminded Dad.

"Neither were any of the things that you endured, Christian" Dad reminded me.

Was he serious? "Dad... I'm not going to argue with you about this. Just... I disagree."

Dad decided it was time to change the subject, thankfully. "Your mother told me about the conversation you had the night before you left for Hawaii. I took it upon myself to do a little investigating. Your grandmother, Elizabeth Carter, was sentenced to 30 years to life for homicide in the death of William Lake in November of 1993. Exactly 24 years ago. At 25 years, she's eligible for parole. It means that she's going to be eligible for parole in the next few months."

"Really?" I asked hopefully.

Dad responded hesitantly, "Now, I think I should caution you... she's been behind bars for a very long time, son."

"I get it, Dad. But if there's any hope that I can meet her, get to know her, help her get paroled... I've got to do it. Dad, she killed my tormenter. She's my... hero."

"I realize that, Christian. Just be careful, OK? I hope she turns out to be all that you want. You deserve that. But she might not be. So, just don't get your hopes up too soon."

"Do you know something you aren't telling me, Dad?" I asked.

"Not at all," Dad assured me. "Just being cautious, as usual. I don't want to see you get hurt again, that's all. I don't know anything about your grandmother except what I've learned in the letters she's sent over the years. She seems to be a good person. I just... think you should guard your heart, just in case. Proceed with caution."

"I want to make a trip to Michigan to visit her in prison," I told Dad.

"I think that's a great idea," Dad responded. "Will you take Anastasia with you?"

"Yes, that's the plan," I answered. "If she's up to it."

We spent the next few minutes talking about Ana's recovery, and the media shit storm that was continuing until now. There wasn't much new to add, and I knew I'd see Dad at the wedding in a couple of days, so we ended the call shortly after that.

The phone call set us back a little, but we still made it to the airport and onto Ana's newest jet, which I had to admit, was nicer than any of mine. Ana made sure to show me her bedroom, where she tried, once again, to seduce me. When I reminded her that she was now up to five delayed orgasms, she pouted for a few minutes, and then she promptly fell asleep.


	45. Ch 45: Meeting Ken & Raina (APOV)

**Chapter 45: Meeting Ken and Raina (Anastasia's POV)**

"You'll never believe who I got an email from this morning," I told Christian on our way to the airport.

He raised his eyebrows curiously. "Who?"

"Jose Rodrigues," I answered with a smirk.

"What did that limp-dicked son of a bitch want?" he asked angrily.

I answered, still smiling, "He wanted to apologize. He sounded truly sincere. He said you'd paid him a visit, and that he'd sent you all the printed pictures he had of me and deleted all the rest. Were you going to tell me about that?"

He smiled sheepishly. "Sure... It just hadn't come up yet."

"How much did you pay him?" I demanded.

He looked surprised. "You really think I'd pay that son of a bitch off?" he asked. "No fucking way."

"You threatened him?" I asked incredulously.

"In a matter of speaking, yes, I most certainly did. I threatened that he wouldn't be able to get a job at Safeway. Does that shock you?"

I considered it for a moment. "No, I guess not. You didn't have to do that, but... thanks. I'm glad he's one less person to worry about."

"You really think he's done being a threat?" Christian asked suspiciously.

"Yeah, I do," I answered with certainty. "He's moving to southern California. I seem to recall him having family there, near San Diego I think. He sounded really remorseful, claimed he was desperate for money and didn't mean to hurt me. I believe him. He wasn't a bad person. Just... not very bright."

"Yeah, he didn't seem like the sharpest tool in the toolshed," Christian agreed. "How did you... never mind."

I smiled cheesily and asked, "How'd I end up in a relationship with him?"

Christian smiled back at me, but grimly. "That was what I was going to ask, but then I thought about some of the women I've been with."

"Well, I'm sure none of your submissives compared to the filthy cunt," I acknowledged. "Anyway, Jose was sweet. Just an all around nice guy. Until he wasn't. And that was that. I never expected to hear his name again. This whole... unfortunate event... really shocked me. It wasn't like him to do something so... low."

"Well, I hope you're right about him not being a threat," Christian said. "If the dumb prick bothers you again, I'll bury his ass."

"I'm sure that won't be necessary," I assured him.

We arrived at the airport and boarded my plane. God, I loved this plane. It was the smoothest ride ever. I'd been sleeping so much lately, plus I knew that trying to get Christian to do anything fun would be pointless, no matter how horny I still was, so I didn't even suggest going to the bedroom. Instead, we sat near the front, within easy earshot of all our staff. All four of our regular CPOs were with us, as well as Veronica and a flight attendant. Christian asked the flight attendant to bring us some juice... he refused to allow me to drink alcohol because of the medication I was still taking. I couldn't complain; he was really taking care of me. Well, except for sexually. I knew I wasn't going to get any relief for a long time; I was only about halfway through my forced purgatory, and I was getting increasingly frustrated.

Once we were in the air, I listened to Sam and Dre bicker quietly for a few minutes. They were hilarious, and neither of them realized it. Dre had been flirting subtly with Sam from the start, and at first, she seemed repulsed by him. She still tried to come across as a hardass, but I could see her tough exterior cracking. I wasn't sure if Dre saw it yet or not, but he wasn't deterred either way. I could see the attraction for both of them. Dre came across as funny and easy-going, but I knew that it was a cover for him; he was at heart a very serious guy, and he was attracted to a serious woman. Sam was big and beautiful, at 6 feet and probably around 200 pounds of solid muscle. I felt safe with her as my CPO. Dre was an attractive guy too, and a solid wall of muscle. He was muscle on top of muscle. I knew that there weren't that many men that Sam had to physically look up to, but at 6'8", Dre was the tallest man I'd ever seen. When I'd first realized the attraction between them, I'd been concerned about both of them doing their jobs well; I didn't want them to be distracted. However, now that I'd gotten to know Dre as well as I knew Sam, I wasn't worried. They were both professionals, and I felt confident in their skills to stay focused and keep me safe.

Across from Sam and Dre, Taylor and Nick were both quietly reading. Taylor was one of the few people that I referred to by his last name, but he seemed to prefer it, and Christian certainly did. I hadn't gotten to know Christian's new CPO Nick Peres yet, but he seemed nice. I'd figured out quickly that he was easy to tease and that he blushed easily, but beyond that, I didn't know much about him. I knew from comments Christian had made that he didn't really like him, but I wasn't sure whether Christian had a good reason. Time would tell.

Once we were in the air and sipping our cranberry juice, I broached a new topic with Christian, one that I'd been thinking about a lot... and missed terribly. "I'm so glad your parents are bringing Christina tomorrow. I've missed her so much. Our daily Skype sessions just aren't enough. I miss her smell."

"I know what you mean," Christian agreed. "It's only been three days for me, but I miss her too. Little squirt. She hasn't stopped throwing her blueberries since you left. You started something, catching them in your mouth. Leo's gotten pretty good at catching them like that too."

"How are Leo and Mia?" I asked.

"Good. Really good. I think he's going to propose to her on this trip. Oh, and they've found a location for their restaurant. Only... I'm not sure how I feel about it, and I'm sure you won't like it either."

I looked at him curiously and waited for him to continue. I could see from his expression that he didn't want to say it. "Well, if it's a bad location, just tell them no," I suggested. "You're funding it. It's a no-brainer."

Christian sighed. "It's actually a great location... just too... personal. It's Escala."

"Oh," I responded. I looked out the airplane window at the clouds. Escala. Would I ever be able to return there? If Mia and Leo opened a cafe there, would I have to go there to show support?

"It's actually a store-front on the north side of the building, at street level. It's not necessary to enter the complex to enter the cafe, although there is an entrance from the Escala lobby as well. It already has a fully functioning kitchen with almost new appliances. Mia said... she hasn't seen anything comparable. We'd just have to remodel the dining room. But still... I'm not sure I can do it. And if they choose it, I'll have to."

I sighed as I continued to look out the window. "Did they find it before... or after?"

"Before, of course. I don't think they would have even considered it otherwise. They didn't want to tell me about it, but I kind of... forced the issue. I was coming down pretty hard on them for dragging their feet in finding a place."

"What are you going to do?" I asked, as I looked back at him.

Christian looked over my shoulder out the window. "I don't know," he answered absently.

I decided to change the subject. "I've been wanting to ask you something... about Gail."

"Gail?" he asked.

I smirked at him again, "Mrs. Jones?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, I know who you're referring to. What about her?"

"She's been taking care of Christina since... since we left Escala. Right?" I asked. I couldn't bring myself to say "since my attack."

"She has," Christian answered. "At first, she asked if I minded. Like I would mind... it wasn't like I needed her at Escala any more. Then, I realized how much we actually did need her to help with Christina, so she's essentially become her nanny. After... what happened, I didn't want to use the nanny service again, even though it wasn't the nanny who was at fault; it was the nurse. Anyway, I just didn't like the idea of not knowing exactly who was going to show up each day. I don't want to use a service again. And anyway, I don't exactly need a housekeeper at my parents' house either. They already have plenty of staff. But Mrs. Jones has been my full-time employee for several years now, and I trust her. It worked out well for her to care for Christina."

"So... what would you think of asking Gail to keep... doing that? Longterm?" I asked.

"You mean instead of or in addition to being our housekeeper?" Christian clarified.

"I'm not sure," I answered. "I'm not sure what all she does, normally. I think it might be too much for her to do it all. But I'd feel better about hiring new people to clean or cook than to take care of our daughter. We know and love Gail. More importantly, Christina knows her, and Gail is good with her."

Christian nodded. "For the short-term, she's already doing it. We'll reevaluate once we get settled."

"I want to buy a house," I announced.

"Way ahead of you, babe," Christian answered.

"You bought a house?" I asked. "Without me?"

Christian smiled at me sadly. "You left. I found a place I thought we'd like, so I acted on it. If you hate it, we'll give it to Elliot and Kate as a wedding gift."

"We're already giving them a trip to Sydney for their wedding gift," I reminded him.

"So?" he asked. "We can give them a house too. If you hate it, we can give it to them or to Mia and Leo. But I hope you love it."

"What's it like?" I asked. "Where is it?"

Christian smiled mischievously. "You'll just have to wait and see," he answered. "It's a surprise."

"You can't do that," I objected. "It can't be a surprise if I already know about it."

His smile widened. "Oh, really?" he challenged. "What exactly do you know about it?"

"It's... a house," I answered. Really, that's all he had given away. Bastard.

He smirked at me. "That's all you're getting, babe."

I smirked back at him, and then I called out, "Taylor, what do you know about this house that Christian bought?"

Taylor looked up from the book he was reading and stared at me blankly. "House?" he asked confusedly. I knew he was playing along with Christian, and that I'd get nowhere with him.

"Nick will tell me," I said.

"Who the hell is Nick?" Christian asked.

I giggled at Christian as Nick looked over Taylor's shoulder at me and said apologetically, "I can't, Ana." He looked almost frightened.

"The boy scout is Nick?" Christian asked confusedly.

"God, Christian, you don't even know your own CPO's name?" I teased him.

"His name is Peres," Christian answered. He glared at Nick as he spoke, and Nick looked quickly back at the book he was reading.

Christian leaned toward me and whispered so only I could hear. "I think he's a closet submissive."

I cracked up. I considered it a good sign that Christian was joking about Nick. Maybe he was getting used to having him as his CPO.

We spent the rest of the plane ride discussing our wedding. We'd already determined the date: February 25, and we knew we wanted to get married in Seattle. We decided that an outdoor wedding was a bad idea that time of year, so we needed to find a good venue as soon as possible. We'd already agreed on the guest list, which included around 300 people. Christian seemed annoyed at my questions about colors and flowers; he told me to do whatever I wanted, but I wanted his opinion. He was more eager to discuss cake flavors and catering choices. I wasn't surprised that he wanted to have an open bar with an endless supply of Cristal. I was surprised, however, that he loved my idea of a groom's cake shaped like an Ismintis-Grey airplane. I expected him to think it was too outrageous.

Later that day, we checked into our room at the resort that Kate had rented. I was happy to find that she had booked the entire resort, all 120 luxury suites, for her wedding. I was also thrilled that Christian and I had what the resort referred to as a "beach cottage," which was one of about half a dozen one-story units with thatched roofs. Each unit was a duplex, and each was located right on the beach. Inside, the suite was much more elaborate than I expected a beach cottage to be. It had a kitchenette with granite counters, a comfortable Italian leather sofa, and a bathroom with an enormous walk-in shower that rivaled Christian's at Escala. For a moment, I felt a little homesick for our penthouses that we'd never see again.

"You OK?" Christian asked as he sensed my melancholy mood.

I didn't want to bring up Escala, so I answered, "Just sad I can't enjoy the waves. No bikinis for me on this trip. Honestly, I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to wear a bikini again."

"You'll wear a bikini again," Christian told me confidently. "You're beautiful, Anastasia. With or without scars. You're going to heal, baby, but if you still have scars that bother you, we'll hire the best cosmetic surgeon in the country to take care of it."

"It's hard to think that far ahead," I responded. "At the moment, I'm more concerned about my bridesmaid dress, which I never actually got fitted for. But I did help Kate pick it out, and I think it's beautiful, but it's strapless. I still have marks on my back and shoulders, and a few on my chest, from the flogging. I'd hoped they would heal before the wedding, but I knew it was wishful thinking. I'm going to ruin Kate's wedding photos."

"You're not going to ruin anything," Christian assured me. "Stop worrying."

"What if it doesn't even fit me?" I continued to worry.

"Kate had your measurements, right?" Christian asked.

"Yeah, and her mom's a designer. In fact, I want to ask her to design my wedding dress. She's good. Really good. Kate's confident that if there are any issues with my bridesmaid's dress, her mom can easily take care of it."

"Well, there you go. Why are you still worried?" Christian asked.

I sighed. How could I express to Christian how I felt about myself and how I wanted others to perceive me since my attack? How could I express my continued fear of appearing weak? Finally, I answered, "This is going to be my first public appearance since..." I sighed again and just said it. "Since my attack. I'm clearly still wounded and still physically weak. I'm not going to be able to dance the night away. What are people going to..."

Christian stopped me with a kiss. It wasn't as chaste as most of his kisses had been lately, but it didn't last long enough. When he ended it, he continued to pepper my face with kisses, and between kisses, he told me, "You... are... a.. badass... not... a... fucking... victim." He looked me in the eye and added, "Get over yourself. Give yourself a break. Let yourself heal. You don't have to prove everything to the world this week. There will be time for that."

Damn if he didn't make me tear up. "I'm sick of fucking crying," I complained.

"Well, stop then," he answered. "Let's go out and find the restaurant they told us about. Let's enjoy a nice dinner. And don't fucking tell me you're not hungry. You haven't eaten since this morning."

"I'm never hungry," I lamented. "But I agree... it will be good to go out."

Christian looked worried. "Ana... it's been more than three weeks. Shouldn't you be getting back to normal by now?"

"I've heard it can take over a month with colon surgery," I answered. "Apparently, I'm not that unusual."

"But... you haven't had any vomiting or dia..."

"Christian! Seriously, are we talking about my bodily functions now?" Shesh! I'd told him that no question was off limits, but didn't he have any boundaries?

"Ana, I need to know. Are you getting better?" he demanded.

"Veronica says I'm recovering normally. And to answer your question, no, I haven't. I've felt nauseated, and I've been constipated. Veronica says that's normal. She insisted on giving me a laxative when a week passed and I still hadn't... gone. Now, she's been making sure I'm eating a lot of fiber. So I've gone a couple of times since then, but it's still not... easy. And I still feel like I've been kicked in the gut. Now, are we done talking about my bowel movements?"

Christian smiled at me, took my hand, and pulled me up from the sofa, where we'd been having this conversation. "Let's go out and get you another high fiber meal," he suggested.

"Do I look OK?" I asked.

"Absofuckinglutely beautiful," he responded.

When we walked out the door of our suite, we were greeted by an attractive couple around our age who were coming from the adjoining suite. The man was a tall, athletic Asian guy, and the woman was beautiful, with long curly brown hair.

"Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele!" the man called out cheerfully. "We couldn't have timed this more perfectly."

Christian and I glanced at each other, and I could see that he didn't look alarmed but curious. We both knew that the only people here at this resort were friends of Kate and Elliot, so we didn't feel that they were a security threat.

"I'm afraid you have us at a disadvantage," Christian responded to the man as he held out his hand to shake.

"Ken Fukushima," the man replied. "And this is my slave, Raina."

I tried and I think succeeded in hiding my shocked reaction to his referring to her as his slave in public. Granted, there wasn't anyone else nearby, and our lives had recently been in the public so much, they had to know we were in the lifestyle. I made eye contact as I greeted Raina, and she smiled shyly before she looked away. I decided that since Ken apparently thought I was Christian's submissive, I would play the part, so I didn't look directly at him or speak to him. I decided that I could take advantage of the opportunity to test Christian, to find out how serious he was about not believing he's a Dom anymore. So instead of greeting Ken, I said to Christian, "He's Chad's friend that Kate mentioned being into Japanese rope bondage. I forgot the name for it again." I really wanted to call Christian "Master," but I knew it would only piss him off because I wasn't wearing my collar.

"You're the shibari master?" Christian asked Ken with interest. I considered the spark in Christian's eye a good sign. He was still interested in at least some aspects of BDSM.

Ken smiled. "I prefer the term kinbaku, and I prefer to refer to myself as a bakushi instead of a master. But yes, I've spent quite a bit of time refining my skills. And our friend Kate did mention that you were interested in learning."

"Is there a difference between shibari and kinbaku?" Christian asked.

"Among the bakushi that I learned from in Japan, no, there's no difference. Shibari is just a more common term in the West, but they recognize it and accept it. But in the West, particularly here in the States among people that practice it, there are practioners who make some pretty far-fetched distinctions. That's the main reason why I prefer to keep things simple and just use the term kinbaku."

"Ana and I are headed to dinner," Christian said. "Would the two of you like to join us?"

"We'd love to," Ken answered.

As we made our way to the restaurant, they continued to discuss specific distinctions of kinbaku, but I tuned them out as I was paying more attention to Raina's behavior. She was walking a couple of steps behind Ken, taking in our surroundings. I walked next to her and let the men walk ahead of us a little.

"It's so beautiful here," I said. "How long have you and Ken been here?"

She answered quietly, "We just arrived this morning. Yes, it's lovely. I love the ocean."

"I've been in Hawaii for the past week, and I've done very little except listen to the ocean. I have to agree with you. I love the ocean, too. It's so calming."

Raina glanced at me and said, still very quietly. "I'm glad you're recovering. There's nothing like the ocean to bring healing."

I thought her choice of words was interesting. "You sound like you know from experience," I commented.

"I do," she said simply. "When I know you better, I'll tell you."

Now I was very curious about Raina, but we'd arrived at the restaurant, so our conversation was cut short. There was no wait at the restaurant, and the host led us to our table, which had a very nice view of the beach.

Christian smiled at me after he pulled out my chair and seated me. "You OK, babe?" he asked.

"I'm good," I answered, averting my eyes.

Christian wasn't going to let that go. "Anastasia, I know what you're doing. You can stop it now." He turned back to Ken, who was watching our interaction curiously, and he told him, "Anastasia is not my sub. I'm not her Dom. We've played on occasion, but we aren't in the lifestyle."

"Is that right?" Ken responded unconvincingly.

The conversation was interrupted by the server who took our drink orders. Christian ordered a bottle of wine for the table and a pineapple juice and sparkling water for me. Over the past few days, I'd gotten in the habit of mixing fresh juice and sparkling water, and Christian knew I liked it.

When the server was out of hearing range, Ken looked directly at me for the first time and said, "I'm happy to see that you're recovering well, Anastasia. It is OK for me to call you Anastasia, isn't it?"

"Yes, or just Ana," I answered. "And... thank you."

Ken continued, looking from me to Christian and back. "I must admit, we've heard a lot about both of you from Kate and Elliot. I must also admit that I grilled them when I found out how well they knew you both. No apologies there... you're both well worth the research I've done. Business research, I mean. I'm an investment banker. But I'm sure you'd rather not talk shop at the moment, so that's not my purpose in telling you that. I just... wanted to be upfront about it, because I probably know more about you both than the average person you meet for the first time."

I wasn't sure how to take that, and one glance at Christian told me that he too was pondering Ken's words. "What kind of research?" Christian asked casually.

"Nothing that you haven't already made public. Business research. Although, I guess I have to admit the rest of it too. Like the rest of the country, I've kind of gotten caught up in the drama that is your lives lately. I follow you both online... I've done that for a while, not just with all the recent shit you've both experienced."

Raina cleared her throat, getting my attention, and I was surprised to see that she was glaring at Ken. What was that about? She quickly composed herself and looked back at the menu. I followed suit, and began to peruse the menu. Actually, I was trying to figure these people out. Their behavior was just a bit odd.

The server brought the wine and my juice and sparkling water. Christian took the liberty of mixing my drink for me. As he did that, he asked the server about high fiber options on the menu. The server recommended a local smoked fish dish with a starch called taro that was apparently packed with fiber. Christian ordered it for both of us. Ken ordered for himself and Raina. She didn't speak the entire time. It did not escape my notice that Christian was taking care of me just like he would as my Dom, and I wasn't complaining.

When the server had finished taking our order and was out of hearing range again, Kentaro turned to me and said discretely, but loud enough for Christian and Raina to hear him, "Raina is too shy to admit it herself, but she is quite taken with you, Anastasia. In fact, my girl hasn't been with another girl in a while, and she'd love the chance. Her oral skills are out of this world, I can assure you. So how about it? How about the two of you swing by our suite after dinner. I can begin to teach you some basic kinbaku techniques, Christian, and then we can both watch Raina go down on..."

"No!" Christian cut him off.

I could see Christian getting visibly angry, so I tried to diffuse Ken before he got any further, so at the same time that Christian spoke, I said, "I'm sorry, but I... am still recovering. I can't have... I can't do anything like that for a few more weeks."

Ken raised his eyebrows, totally ignoring Christian's outburst. "How unfortunate for you. Well, we'll just have to take a raincheck then."

Christian stood up from the table and said angrily, "There will be no fucking raincheck. What the hell do you mean, making such an invitation after meeting us, what, twenty minutes ago? Why the hell would you think that was acceptable? What fucking planet do you come from?" Christian pulled out my chair, and I started to stand. We were obviously leaving. Oh well. It wasn't like I was hungry anyway. I still felt disappointed though, even though I felt thoroughly confused and shocked by this man's behavior.

Ken started sniggering, and when he looked at Raina, who looked so angry she was about to explode, he began to laugh uncontrollably. Finally, as I stood up to go, Raina could stand it no longer. "Please, don't go," she begged. "Ken is being an asshole. He does this sometimes, when he meets somebody he wants to be friends with." She stood up and took my hand. "Please, just give me a chance to explain before you go. Then, if you still want to go, I won't stop you. But don't let Ken's idiotic behavior scare you away. I wouldn't blame you if it did, but... please, don't."

I was curious. If she were really his slave, how was she able to call him an asshole and his behavior idiotic? "Let's give them five minutes," I suggested to Christian.

When we heard Raina tell Ken to shape the fuck up before she had to kick his ass, I could see that Christian was just as curious as I was. What the hell was wrong with these people? And how the hell were they friends with Elliot and Kate?

"You're an asshole, you know that?" Raina told Ken as Christian and I took our seats again. Ken wiped the tears from his eyes... he'd laughed so hard he'd cried... and he seemed to straighten up.

Raina explained, "Ken has a habit of... umm... testing limits. That's what he's been doing through this ridiculous conversation, beginning by coming across as an over-eager business fanboy, and then pretending to be interested in watching us..." she turned to me and pointed back and forth between us. "I'm not bi, and I know you aren't either. And Ken knows it too. Besides, he doesn't share me. Ever."

"Nor do I share Ana. Ever," Christian said forcefully.

Ken sniggered, but Raina was the one to speak, "Yeah, we know that too. Ken was testing your limits too."

"You still want to try to convince me you aren't a Dom and that she's not your sub?" Ken asked Christian seriously.

"We aren't in the lifestyle," Christian insisted through clenched teeth.

"Look, I get it," Ken answered, still serious. "I know what happened. Hell, I SAW what happened. I understand why you'd think you don't want to go near a playroom ever again. But..."

"What do you mean, you SAW what happened," I asked with my usual CEO calm and collected persona. "Did you watch the live stream of my rape?"

Ken looked at me directly and answered apologetically, "I did. I wasn't exaggerating when I told you earlier that I follow you both online. I got a ping when I was working, and when I followed the link... yes, I saw it. Probably from the beginning. When I realized what was happening, I called 911, but a lot of fucking good it did... I wasn't even in Seattle. We were in San Francisco. I didn't even know where you were, so there was no way I could give them an address. I couldn't even convince the fucking 911 dispatcher that it was happening live. I tried though. I swear, I did."

"I believe you," I told him. And I did. I still wasn't sure why he was telling me though. What the hell, I could be direct too. "Why are you telling me all this?" I asked.

Ken answered without hesitation, counting on his fingers, "One, because I want to earn your trust. Two, because what happened to you is very relevant to the conversation we want to have with you. Three, because I recognize the pain and confusion you're both feeling because I've been there. Raina and I have both been there. Four, because it pains me to see you torture yourselves. Five, because I think I can help you."

Christian was clearly offended by Ken's words. He sneered, "If you are so pained because you think we're fucking torturing ourselves, and you seriously think you want to 'help us,' then why the fuck were you laughing your ass off?"

Ken didn't laugh again, but he also didn't appear to be intimidated by Christian. "Yes, you are clearly still a Dom. A very frustrated one at the moment. Let me assure you, you can get past this. More importantly, your submissive NEEDS you to get past it. She's clearly sexually frustrated."

"She's clearly sexually frustrated because she isn't permitted to have a fucking orgasm for six fucking weeks," Christian snapped angrily.

"Christian," I stopped him. "TMI."

Ken responded, "Look... you're right, it's none of my business. And there's no replacement for a good orgasm. But kinbaku can help. There are pressure points... you know, like acupuncture..."

"We don't need your fucking help," Christian snapped again.

"Oh, but you do," Ken disagreed with no malice.

Raina spoke before Ken had a chance to continue. "You need to get to the fucking point before you lose them again," she told him in a warning tone.

Ken sighed as he looked at Raina and said, "I told you I wasn't going to hold anything back. You and I both know that they're angry because I admitted that I saw her attack, but I had to tell them about it. If they found out about it later, how do you think they'd feel?"

"Just get to it," she pressed. "Now that you've drug it out this way. You've forced my fucking hand, so just get it over with."

"Will you just chill the fuck out," Ken told Raina. "Aiden trusts them, and he's the best there is."

Christian and I glanced at each other again, and I could see that he was just as clueless as I was, but a lot angrier than I was. Not angry enough to leave though. We didn't have a chance to continue the discussion yet at that moment though because the server brought our dinner.

Once we all had our plates in front of us and we were alone again, Christian spoke, and it was evident immediately that he had calmed down. "I must admit... this is one of the most bizarre conversations I've had in a while. But OK, I'll bite. I know two people named Aiden. One works for me, and the other is an FBI agent. My money is on the FBI agent. Care to explain?"

Ken answered, "We know about McKendrick, the kid who works for you, because of his police report from a few years ago. He's pretty irrelevant though. The Aiden we were speaking of is Raina's brother, Aiden Westlake. Your money was on the right one."

"Aiden Westlake is your brother?" Christian asked Raina.

"Yes, and there's a lot more to the story. A whole hell of a lot more to it," Raina answered. "Before I tell you, I need your assurance that this stays between us. Even Chad and Leona don't know what we're about to tell you, and Chad is one of Ken's best friends."

"Why are you telling us?" I asked suspiciously.

Ken answered, "I told you earlier that I want to help you, and that's true, but we also need your help. When you hear Raina's story, I think you're going to want to help us."

I looked at Raina curiously and said, "Well, let's hear it then."

"I still need your assurance first. From both of you."

"Do we need to sign an NDA?" I asked. It sounded like a joke, but I was serious.

"No, if you give us your word, we will trust you," Raina answered.

"OK, then you have my word that I won't repeat what you're about to tell us to anyone," I told her. "As long as you're not confessing to any crimes."

"Same here," Christian agreed.

"Good, but I can't give you the assurance that I won't admit to any crimes," Ken admitted. "But none that the FBI aren't already aware of," he added.

"Is he being an idiot again?" I asked Raina. I was really getting annoyed with his behavior because I wasn't sure when he was serious and when he wasn't.

Raina answered, "When Ken acts like an idiot, it's always a cover. He's one of the most intelligent people you'll ever meet. But I'm fucking pissed off at him at the moment because I wasn't ready to reveal what I'm about to reveal. It's true that we need your help, and there's nobody in the world who is in the position that you are both in to help with our cause. And I believe that when you find out about it, you're going to want to join us on our crusade."

"Well, get to it already," Christian told her impatiently.

"See, I told you," Ken commented dryly. "Frustrated Dom. Seriously though, let me be the one to let you in on the biggest secret that Raina and I have from the world. If you think we're odd, you haven't seen anything yet. We're probably the biggest paradox you'll ever encounter. My slave here is actually a modern-day abolitionist. We both are on a crusade to free victims of human trafficking. As you've certainly realized by now, Raina's no slave, but you're two of only about a dozen people now who know the truth. And we're trusting you to keep our secret."

"That's not all," Raina continued. "I'm not a slave... now. But I was one. When I was fourteen years old, my own mother sold me. That's a story for another day. I don't want to get into all that. But I want you to understand that I know about human trafficking as an insider. And I'm fucking determined to free others like me."

They certainly had our attention now. "How did you... escape?" I asked Raina.

"I didn't," she answered. "Ken purchased me."

"Actually, I won her in a poker game," he corrected. "From an asshole by the name of Joseph Horowitz."


	46. Ch 46: Raina & Ken's Story (CPOV)

**Chapter 46: Raina and Ken's Story (Christian's POV)**

I snuggled Christina a little closer and inhaled her sweet baby scent as she napped in my arms. Mom and Dad had arrived with her just a couple of hours ago, and Christina had been asleep in my arms for the past twenty minutes or so. Ana and I were cuddling on the sofa in our suite, both of us watching Christina's innocent face.

"I don't ever want to let her go," I told Ana quietly. I knew she was also thinking about all the terrible shit that we'd learned in the past 24 hours.

"If anyone is able to keep her safe, it's you," Ana said reassuringly.

"I couldn't keep you safe," I lamented.

Ana sighed and snuggled closer to me. "Stop blaming yourself. I'm going to be OK."

I sighed, because I wasn't sure if that was true. Was she going to be OK? Sure she would recover this time, but what about next time? Would I ever be able to keep either of them completely safe? There would always be threats, and if we did what Ken and Raina Fukushima wanted us to do, there would most likely be even more threats than we already faced as powerful CEOs. Could I protect my family?

Ana and I had both been completely shattered by Raina's story, which she and Ken had told us over the course of the evening. At first she hadn't wanted to tell us all, but Ken had convinced her, because apparently they believed we had a big role to play in their mission to end sex trafficking. We actually did end up going back to their suite, but not for any sexual activity. That fucker had been fucking with me, just to get me to admit I'm still a Dom. Asshole.

Now that I knew more about Kentaro Fukushima, I didn't hate the guy, and in fact I had to respect him, even if I did still think he was an asshole. I had ordered background checks on him and Raina, as well as her brother, my FBI contact, Aiden Westlake. Everything Fukushima had told us checked out. He was a trust fund child of several generations of successful Japanese Americans. Once they'd been let out of the internment camps after World War 2, they'd become very successful business people, on both sides of his family.

There were holes in Raina's background check from a decade ago, but even that fact collaborated her story about being held in captivity. She was basically a missing person for most of her teenage years. There was no question in my mind that everything that she told us was absolutely true. Her brother was a couple of years older than her and the same age as Ken (as well as Elliot and their friend in common, Chad Chesterfield, who owned the home where Ana and I had gone to the play party, the same one where Elliot and Kate had met). Ken and Aiden had gone to college together, where they'd met and become friends.

I learned from his background check that Aiden Westlake had left "home" at around age 16 and had lived with the family of one of his high school classmates, none other than Chad Chesterfield. Aiden had never officially been in foster care; Chad's family had taken him in informally. However, my background check as well as the stories that Ken and Raina told us revealed the reality that Aiden and Raina both should have been in foster care; their lives would have almost certainly been better if they had been taken away from their excuse for a mother when they were born. She was a crack whore who never provided a real home for them. According to Raina, their mother had been abusive to both of them, both physically and mentally. When Aiden had left home at 16, their mother had refused to let Raina have any contact with him. They'd lost touch since they attended different schools. This was why Aiden hadn't known when Raina had "disappeared." It wasn't until two years later, when he was leaving Seattle to go to college, that he found out not only that she was missing but that their mother had essentially sold her. Ken filled in the details here, that the crack whore had confessed to Aiden that she'd sold Raina in a virgin auction two years earlier, and she hadn't seen her since.

Aiden had reported their mother to the police and had filed a missing person's report for Raina, but the police gave him very little hope of finding her. He left town believing that he was unlikely to ever see his sister again. He'd gotten a scholarship to Golden Gate University and moved to San Francisco. That was where he'd met Ken, who'd grown up in the Silicon Valley. They'd been roommates, and Ken had found out all about Raina during their first weekend in the dorm, when they'd both gotten drunk and stayed up telling their life's stories until they'd both passed out.

Aiden had believed that Raina was dead... until a couple of years later, when he and Ken had visited a BDSM club, and they had seen submissive girls there who were being auctioned off. They found out from the friend who'd invited them that the girls were selling themselves as submissives, and some of them had been in the lifestyle for a few years. Aiden began to wonder if it were possible that Raina was still alive and living as a submissive. At night, he would lie awake pondering where she might be. He began to research the BDSM lifestyle, and what he found out made him even more determined to find out what happened to Raina. He learned that not all of those submissive girls were there by choice. What if Raina were still alive, and being forced into sexual servitude?

From the moment he realized the truth behind human trafficking that was a reality in some BDSM circles, Aiden changed his major to Criminal Justice and determined to devote his life to fighting this particular crime. Ken was a business major, but he was interested in Aiden's research and often frequented BDSM clubs and play parties with him. They both took on roles as Dominants when they went to these events, and Ken speculates that deep down, he was always a Dominant. Ken quickly recognized a difference between people who were in the lifestyle for their own pleasure and fulfillment, and those who were in it for evil purposes. It wasn't long before he considered himself part of the former group, and his hatred for the latter group grew because of the bad rep they gave the lifestyle as a whole. For Aiden, though, Dominance was all an act. He wasn't interested in the lifestyle, only in finding Raina, if she was even still alive.

During their junior year of college, something happened that changed their friendship profoundly. While they were out one night, a homeless man attacked Ken with a knife. They speculated later that the man was a mentally ill Vietnam War veteran, and he'd confused Ken for a Viet Kong enemy soldier. Ken still seemed angry as he told he story, that anyone could confuse him for Vietnamese. Not that he had anything against anyone from Vietnam, he quickly explained, but he believed he looked so Japanese that he wasn't sure how anyone could confuse the two, even a mentally ill person.

Anyway, the crazy homeless guy had stabbed Ken a few times and held the knife to his throat, but Aiden shot the man before he could slit Ken's throat. By that time, Aiden had not only gotten a gun and had a license to carry, but he had also become an excellent shot. The police ruled the incident self defense, and the crazy guy eventually recovered, from the gunshot anyway, not from his mental illness. Ken had to be hospitalized due to his stab wounds, and he showed us the scars. He said it didn't take him long to recover because his stab wounds had been much less severe than Ana's.

From that point forward, Ken felt indebted to Aiden for saving his life. He vowed to help Aiden find Raina, or at least find out what happened to her. He felt he owed it to his best friend to help him solve the mystery that had haunted him ever since Ken had known him.

When they graduated from Golden Gate University, they both started graduate school immediately. Ken got a Master's in Finance from the University of San Francisco, and Aiden moved to Irvine to study Forensic Psychology at the University of California.

It was while they were in their first semester of graduate school that Ken purchased his first slave, a 19-year old girl who went by the name of Rachel. She met Raina's description to a T, and Ken didn't think he could pass up the opportunity to possibly free his best friend's sister. The only photos he'd seen of Raina were of a 14-year old, and the girl he purchased looked like he imagined she would after six years. Unfortunately, it turned out that Rachel wasn't Raina. Even more unfortunately, when Ken had given the girl her freedom, she didn't know what to do with it. She ended up jumping off the Golden Gate Bridge only a few weeks after he freed her.

Before finishing graduate school, Ken had purchased two other girls who met Raina's description, and both of them turned out not to be her. To make matters worse, both of them had outcomes similar to the first girl, Rachel. While they didn't commit suicide, they did both turn to drugs, and eventually ended up in abusive relationships. One of the girls, Renee, was beaten to death by her boyfriend/Dominant. The other girl, Laine, was still alive to the best of Ken's knowledge, but she was a heroin addict who had been in a series of abusive relationships.

Ken said that Aiden forced him to promise not to purchase any more girls. Aiden's argument was that Ken was enabling the criminals who were trafficking girls, actually breaking the law himself, and he had to stop. Ken had promised not to buy any more girls, but he hadn't stop looking for Raina. When he'd found her in Seattle during a weekend trip where he'd been scouting out job opportunities as well as the BDSM scene, she'd been locked in a cage in the corner of Joseph Horowitz's living room. At the time, he didn't know if it was Raina, but he knew she fit the description. When Horowitz actually called her Raina, Ken knew he had to free her. He suggested to the other men in the room that they play a game of poker, knowing that he had a history of being really good at calculating his odds. He'd always been able to pick up extra spending money by playing poker or blackjack, so he counted on his good luck to save the day, and it had.

He'd left there that night with a pocket full of money and Raina, who was wearing nothing but a collar and his jacket, which he'd slipped on her just before they'd left the house. As soon as he got her to his hotel room, she'd taken off his jacket and knelt for him. He didn't admit it to her until months later, but he'd fallen for her then and there. But to her, it seemed that he found her disgusting. He'd insisted that she put on a t-shirt and some sweats that he gave her.

"Have I displeased you, Master?" she'd asked him.

"Not at all," he'd assured her. "It's just that... I think you're my best friend's kid sister, so I can't fuck you. And as long as you're naked, I want to fuck you."

Raina had forgotten everything about her life before captivity, so she was confused by Ken's words. But she hadn't said so. She hadn't spoken at all until he asked her, "What's your full name?"

"My name is Raina, Sir," she had answered him.

"What's your last name?" he had asked.

"I don't know, Sir," she had replied. Ana and I had both thought that was strange that Raina didn't know her own name until they explained that Raina had been so traumatized during her six years of captivity that she couldn't remember anything beyond her first name.

"Westlake?" Ken had suggested. "Do you think your name might be Raina Westlake?"

Raina had considered it. "Maybe, Sir," she had responded. "If that is what you want my name to be, if it pleases you to call me that, then..."

"No," Ken had cut her off. "I don't want... Stop it, OK? I'm not your fucking master. Stop calling me Sir or Master and thinking about what pleases me. You're not my slave or my submissive."

"I don't understand, Sir," Raina had responded.

"Just... be still for a minute," Ken had told her. He'd taken a picture and texted it to Aiden with the message, "You need to get your ass to Seattle. Now. I think this is your sister."

Aiden had responded immediately, "You promised me you wouldn't buy any more fucking girls."

"I didn't buy her," Ken had texted back. He decided to wait until later to tell Aiden that he'd won her in a poker game.

A few hours later, Aiden had arrived in Seattle and at Ken's hotel room. As soon as Raina had laid eyes on Aiden, she'd recognized him. She didn't know how she knew him, but she knew that she'd seen him before. But seeing a familiar face had done something to jog her memory, and bits of their childhood had begun to come back to her piece by piece. Aiden had known as soon as he saw her face that she was Raina. The impossible had happened: he had his sister back.

It actually took several months for Raina to remember everything that had happened to her, and as memories came back, she relived traumatic events over and over again. Through it all, both Aiden and Ken were there for her. Ken had insisted on paying for therapy sessions for her, which she attended daily for several months, and which she still attended a couple of times per month to this day.

When Aiden finished his graduate degree, he'd gotten a job working with the San Francisco Police Department, and the three of them had rented an apartment in the Castro district. Meanwhile, Raina had taken the GED and started classes at City College. She had a lot to make up for, considering the fact that she hadn't been in school since eighth grade. It didn't take her long to catch up, though, with Ken's help. Within a year, she had gotten accepted to San Francisco State University, and within three years, she had completed a degree in Social Work.

During the first year of Raina's studies at San Francisco State, her relationship with Ken grew increasingly stronger. At first, Ken had insisted that they were just friends, even though Raina admitted to him that she had deeper feelings for him. He told her that it was only because he'd rescued her, and that she'd outgrow those feelings once more time had passed and she'd healed more from her trauma. Raina disagreed. She caught Ken staring at her often, but he refused to even admit that he was attracted to her. He felt that it would be a betrayal to Aiden if he fucked his sister. It was Aiden who finally called Ken on his bullshit.

One day when Aiden arrived home from work, he had walked in on an argument that Ken and Raina had been having. Ken didn't approve of the short skirt that Raina was wearing, and he'd told her to change. She'd reminded him that he wasn't her Dom or master, and she could wear what she wanted. Ken had ended up making Raina cry by telling her how trashy she looked. Aiden had walked in just as Ken was going off on her, and he'd heard enough of their exchange to understand fully what was going on.

Once Raina had stormed into her room, Aiden had asked Ken, "When are you going to admit how you feel about her?"

Ken had just stared at Aiden without responding.

"Admit it, man. You're in love with her," Aiden had said.

"I'm not..." Ken had objected.

"You are!" Aiden had insisted. "You think I don't see how you look at her? You think she doesn't see it too? Why are you torturing yourself? And her... don't you think she's been tortured enough already?"

Ken had continued to stare at Aiden like he had two heads. "Are you saying...?" he'd finally ventured to ask, "If I were to... pursue a relationship with your sister...? I mean, deeper than the friendship we already have...? Are you saying... you'd be OK with that?"

Aiden had laughed in his face. "You're pathetic, you know that? All these months, why the hell didn't you just ask me if you were so worried about whether or not I'd approve?"

"So... you approve?" Ken had asked tentatively.

Aiden had put his hand on Ken's shoulder and answered, "Let me put it this way. If it weren't for you, she'd still be locked in a cage somewhere. I trust you to take care of her. Besides, you're in love with each other. You belong together. But if you hurt her, I'll fuck you up."

Not another word had been spoken between them. Instead, Ken had headed straight to Raina's room, where he'd barged in without even knocking, pulled her out of the bed where she was crying, and kissed her with all the pent-up passion that he'd been holding back for months.

"I love you," he'd told her when he'd caught his breath enough to speak. He then apologized for making her cry, but he explained that he just couldn't stand the idea of other men lusting after her.

From that point forward, they'd been inseparable. Raina recalled for us the experience of having vanilla sex for the first time, and how new it was for her. She also described her confusion and frustration at her desire for more elements from BDSM. She couldn't understand why she craved some of the things she wanted Ken to do to her when in her past life, it had always been abuse. For his part, Ken refused to do anything with her beyond vanilla sex. He wouldn't admit that he also wanted more kink, because he was too concerned with reminding her of her trauma. However, after attending a few counseling sessions with her, Ken gained a better understanding of Raina's trust in him and her desire to take their relationship to a new level. That was when he first began to research Kinbaku. Amazingly, Raina found healing from her own trauma through the type of sexual bondage that they practiced.

As Raina described her experience with Kinbaku, I could see how interested Ana was in it. Hell, I had always been interested in this shit, and now I knew we would need to explore it. My girl needed it. I understood that now. But it would have to wait until she was fully healed.

Anyway, Ken had become an independent financial consultant even before finishing his master's degree, and he was able to work online from anywhere in the world. He promised Raina that they could go anywhere she wanted, and she wanted to see the world. When she'd finished her degree, they'd travelled for a while, but then she'd determined that she really wanted to continue her education. They'd ended up in Saint Louis, Missouri, where Raina had gotten a Master's in Social Work from Washington University. While there, she interned with a local organization called Safe Connections, where she counseled teenagers who had suffered abuse similar to her own.

By the time Raina was finished with her MSW degree, Aiden had gotten his dream job with the FBI and was living in Washington, DC. She and Ken moved there, and the three of them shared an apartment once again. For over a year, Raina interned for a national organization that fights against human trafficking called Polaris. During this time, Ken spent a few months in Japan learning about Kinbaku, but they Skyped everyday. Raina took a few trips to Japan, so they saw each other often. But she was learning so much by working with Polaris that she didn't want to leave it for an extended time.

It was Raina's idea for them to return to the scene of some of her worst nightmares. They still weren't sure if they wanted to stay in Seattle longterm, which is why they were still living with Chad and Leona, but in the few weeks that they had been there, they said that it had begun to feel more like home. Raina said that she had not only dealt with everything that happened to her, but she had also gotten some very valuable experience working with others like her who were determined to eradicate human trafficking from the world. And she was out for blood. She wanted to find the men who had hurt her, and she wanted to expose them for the cowards that they were.

What Raina had experienced was worst than anything that Ana and I could have ever imagined. When her mother had sold her when she was only 14 years old, Raina had believed she was only selling her virginity. That in itself would have been horrible enough. Raina fully expected that the man who purchased her would rape her, and then return her home after taking her virginity. What actually happened was so much worse than that. The man didn't only purchase her virginity. He purchased her. She became his property for the next few months.

Raina had no idea how long she was held captive by her first master, who he was, where he lived, or even what he looked like. During the months of abuse from him, she was never permitted to even see his face. The only way she would ever be able to recognize him again was by his voice. She had been drugged on the night he purchased her, so she had no idea how she even got to his home, if it was indeed his home where he kept her. She was locked in a room, what she now recognizes as a BDSM dungeon, and not permitted to leave it for the entire time that she was his captive. When he entered the room, he always wore the same mask he'd been wearing the night her purchased her. If he ever removed the mask, Raina didn't know, because it would have been only after he'd blindfolded her.

For months, he trained her to be a perfect slave, and she learned through being terrorized what she had to do to avoid being punished by the man. She had never learned his name; he'd demanded that she simply call him "master." He brought her food everyday, but he only allowed her to eat it if she pleased him. She learned to do whatever she had to do to avoid displeasing him. Not only did he starve her if she failed to please him; he also punished her severely. She still had scars from some of his beatings.

Raina had no idea of how much time had passed, but she guessed it was a few months, when the man blindfolded her and led her from the room. Another man was in the next room, and after forcing her to perform oral sex, he took her with him and strapped her in a car. She was cuffed and blindfolded the entire time, but she remembered a long car ride. Eventually, she slept, and when she woke up, she was locked in another room, similar to the first one, another BDSM dungeon.

This second master was not as physically abusive as the first one, but he was worse in other ways. He not only raped her on a daily basis, but he also shared her. In fact, she was gang raped on a regular basis. And this continued for a long time. She has no idea how much time passed, but it was probably a couple of years.

Her next master was a combination of the first second ones. Raina still experienced daily rapes and weekly gang rapes. But this third master was also similar to the first one in that he enjoyed punishing her with whips and canes, and he didn't need a reason. This abuse continued for a very long time, probably the longest of all of them.

Her fourth and final master had been Joseph Horowitz. His treatment of her had been pretty similar to the previous one, with one exception. She was not his only slave, and the others were even younger than herself. He used her to train them, since her behavior by that time was what assholes like Horowitz considered a perfect slave.

Joseph Horowitz was the only one of her former masters whose name she knew, and that was only because of Ken. She would recognize Numbers 2 and 3 if she saw them again, but she never knew their names. She would only know Number 1 if she heard his voice again. But in spite of her lack of knowledge about them, she was determined to discover their identity and make them pay for what they'd done to her and countless other girls. She wanted more than anything to out them to the world for the cowards that they were, and make sure that they never hurt any more girls.

Ken and Raina were fully aware of the FBI investigation into Joseph Horowitz because Aiden was the one leading that investigation. He had gotten a transfer to Seattle around the same time that they all determined to move there and look for Raina's tormentors. Ken and Raina also knew much more about Elena Lincoln, and specifically her connection to me, than I would have preferred. In fact, there was very little, it seemed, that Ken and Raina didn't know, even down to the fact that fucking Hyde had purchased six of my submissive's videos from Elena Lincoln. According to them, Hyde had not been a person of interest with the FBI, at least not related to the human trafficking ring that Elena had been involved with, or anything that Aiden was investigating. Apparently, his only connection was with Elena in regards to my videos. He'd only contacted her because he knew there was something between her and me, because he'd been stalking me and had seen us together.

Raina had known Elena through Horowitz. In fact, Raina had been in charge of training the girls that Elena supplied to Horowitz. Raina even suspected that Elena might have had something to do with her own abduction, when her mother had sold her into captivity. There was no way to get information from her mother though, because she'd died of an overdose years earlier, when Aiden was in college and Raina was still in captivity. And of course we couldn't question Elena, because she was dead now too.

Ken and Raina knew that Elena had introduced me to the lifestyle, but they hadn't known I'd been as young as I was. In fact, Raina and I were the same age, and we'd both been 14 when we'd been introduced to the lifestyle, although my own introduction didn't come even close to rivaling hers in its degree of horror. My young age didn't surprise them because they knew she'd had a habit of manipulating troubled boys like I had been. They knew of about a dozen others, including all of the ones I was already aware of. They also knew more about Isaac than even I did at this point. They knew more details than they were willing to share about the shit Brenda had exposed him to. They also knew that Elena had acted with the full knowledge... and approval... of Joseph Horowitz. Apparently, the bastard had sold his own son to the devil.

After telling us all, they finally got to the point. They were convinced that Ana and I were in a perfect position to help them establish an organization that would provide support to victims of human trafficking. Not only that, but since we were so high profile, we could bring national attention to the still prevalent problem of human trafficking, which would go a long way to ending it. Raina wanted to remain hidden as long as possible, which is why she always appeared to be Ken's slave. She no longer went by the name Westlake because she didn't want people to know she was related to Aiden until they were deemed trustworthy. It was a well-known fact in the BDSM circles they wanted to infiltrate that Aiden Westlake was an FBI agent, so they distanced themselves from him except in private settings. Ken and Raina had gotten married when she was in graduate school, and she'd taken his name, so this helped her keep her cover.

I asked them to share the business plan for the nonprofit that they wanted to start, and I was impressed with the research they'd done and plans that they would put in place as soon as they had the resources they needed. Ken was wealthy, and he planned to invest a great deal of his wealth, but they needed more. They wanted us on board, not just for the capital that we could bring, but also for the public face that they thought we could provide.

Ana asked them why they didn't keep working with Polaris, and they explained that they planned to partner with them, but that they wanted to have more control over how they operated. Ana and I both understood where they were coming from, being control freaks ourselves when it came to our businesses.

Ana and I had a choice to make. As we sat there cuddling our sleeping daughter in our arms in our hotel suite, I wanted nothing more than to run as far away from Ken and Raina Fukushima as possible. If we agreed to help them, would it mean that our lives would forever be entangled with people like Elena Lincoln had been, and like Joseph Horowitz still was? I was already worried about how to protect Christina; would involvement in this endeavor not put her in even greater danger?

"We have to do it," Ana said softly, breaking me out of my reverie.

"No, I don't want to," I disagreed. "It's too dangerous."

"We'll be able to set boundaries. We don't have to get directly involved with rescuing victims. They just want us to provide the resources for supporting them after they've been rescued. You've said several times now that you want to help boys who are like you were. This is a chance to help both the boys and girls."

"If we put our faces on this the way they want us to, we're going to become even bigger targets than we already are. We can finance their program, but that's it."

"I think we can do more than just that," Ana argued.

"No, Anastasia. It's too risky," I insisted.

Christina began to stir in my arms, ending our conversation. I knew it wasn't over though. I could see how determined Ana was to do whatever Ken and Raina asked us to, and I was not at all happy about that. It wasn't that I didn't approve of what they wanted to do, but I just didn't want to put my family in danger.

We agreed not to discuss the matter again until we returned to Seattle. Instead, we decided to enjoy Elliot and Kate's wedding. This included a family Thanksgiving dinner on Thursday that doubled as their wedding rehearsal dinner. Then on Friday afternoon, they had their wedding ceremony, followed by a lavish dinner.

Anastasia had been worried about her appearance for no reason; she was radiant in her bridesmaid dress. Somehow, Ana's friend Franco, who now ran Ismintis Beauty, Ana's salons that I gave her after withdrawing my support from Elena, was able to use makeup to hide Ana's sores and bruises that had not yet healed, so the naked eye could not see that she'd been almost beaten and stabbed to death just a few weeks ago.

She held up very well too, and was even able to eat enough to satisfy me at both the Thanksgiving dinner and the wedding dinner. She didn't start looking tired until late Friday evening, after we'd finished dinner, danced a couple of dances, and made our customary best man and maid of honor speeches. Elliot and Kate had just finished cutting the cake. We were sitting at a table with Ken and Raina, who were playing their usual public roles. Thankfully, Ken was allowing Raina to feed herself since they were in public, not just including people in the lifestyle. I wasn't sure how they were able to keep up their facade all the time.

"Kentaro!" Raina suddenly whispered fervently. We'd learned in our long conversation with them a couple of nights earlier that she NEVER called him Kentaro unless she was in distress. It was a signal between them, like a safe word. "At your nine o'clock. That's number three."

If anyone overheard her other than us, they wouldn't have understood the meaning behind her words. But I understood her code language immediately, and Ken obviously did too. He glanced casually over his shoulder in the direction that she had referred, and so did I. I was shocked at the person I saw standing there, no doubt congratulating my brother on his nuptials. It was none other than Edward Danforth, the same fucking OB/GYN who had treated Leila when she was pregnant with Christina and then lied to me about the ultrasound. No wonder he had lied, since he had obviously been in cahoots with Elena. He had been Raina's third master, the one who had held her in captivity the longest and had ultimately sold her to Jospeh Horowitz.

I spoke loud enough for anyone sitting near us to hear. "Ken, would you mind if Raina accompanied Ana back to our suite? My girl is exhausted, and I want to make sure she gets back safely, but I still need to talk to Elliot." Of course, Ken and Raina both knew that Ana's CPOs, Prescott and Wesson, were standing by and would accompany Ana anywhere she went. But others weren't aware of this unless they were observing very closely.

Ken responded by whispering something in Raina's ear. Without speaking again, she got up from her seat, and helped Ana stand up. Ana had also quickly realized exactly what was happening, and she played her part perfectly despite her exhaustion. Ana realized that it was actually Raina that we wanted to get away from the confrontation we were about to have, but I wanted Ana to be out of harm's way as well, so I was glad she was going to our suite. She would be safe with both of her CPOs, as well as Ryan and Reese, Christina's CPOs, who were in our suite with Gail and Christina.

Once our girls were out of the room, I walked towards Elliot, who was still speaking with the asshole Dr. Danforth. I put my hand on my brother's shoulder, congratulated him again, and apologized for what was about to happen.

Then, without giving the asshole any warning, I punched Edward Danforth in the face.


	47. Ch 47: Exposing Edward Danforth (CPOV)

**Chapter 47: Exposing Doctor Danforth (Christian's POV)**

"What the hell, Christian?" I heard my confused brother's voice as I pummeled the asshole doctor's face again. Taylor was standing nearby, and I knew from his posture that he was going to stop me if I attempted to punch the fucker a third time.

I was angry, but not so angry that I didn't know exactly what I was doing, and I'm sure my calm voice confused Elliot even further as I responded to his question by asking him, "Why did you invite this asshole to your wedding?"

Elliot answered, sounding very confused, "Because Mom asked me to. They work together. She's known him for years. What's going on, bro?"

Two nights earlier, when Raina had told us her story, Ana had asked her what she would do when she came face to face with any of the men who had tormented her. Her answer really surprised me.

"I'll leave the room as quickly as possible. Get to a safe place. And then call Aiden."

It was obvious that she'd given her answer a lot of thought. She went on to explain that it wasn't what her first reaction would be, and that what she really wanted to do was tie the asshole up and give him a taste of his own medicine. But after years of counseling, she had realized that doing that would only give her a moment's satisfaction, if even that. She wanted to live in the long-term reality that all of the men who'd hurt her were paying for their crimes and unable to hurt any more girls. She knew damn well that, just like in my own case against Elena, the term of the statute of limitations had already passed, so she could not prosecute any of them for what they'd done to her. Eight years had passed since Ken had rescued her. But she knew that what they did to her was a lifestyle, and she was not the only victim. If Aiden were able to begin an investigation, once he knew who it was he needed to investigate, she was certain that he would find other girls being abused currently. That would be enough to put him behind bars. She also knew that her former masters knew each other, at least well enough to pass her on from one to another. She suspected that if she found one, she would find a trail that would lead to the others.

It was imperative, she said, for him not to realize that she was a threat. Ideally, he would not even see her or recognize her, which was why she would leave as quickly as possible. If he did see her, she wanted to make him believe that she was still a brainwashed slave and that Ken was her master. This was why they lived their façade.

This was also why, as soon as I heard her tell Ken that Edward Danforth was her third master, I acted, with the same precision and immediacy that had made me billions. Ana and I had not needed to say a word to one another. We both knew that Raina needed to leave the room and get to safety before Danforth saw her, and if he or anyone with him had already seen her, we needed to behave as if Ken were her master. This was why I asked Ken's permission for Raina to accompany Ana back to our suite, where four bodyguards would be present to keep her safe in case Danforth had any friends who recognized her. Since the entire world knew about my lifestyle from the video, it wasn't any stretch of the imagination for anyone in that lifestyle who was watching us to believe we were two Dominants discussing our submissives.

I'm sure it gave Ken great satisfaction to see me pummel Danforth's face a couple of times, but that wasn't why I did it. It was more personal to me than that. Besides, I knew better than to let Danforth in on the secret that his former slave was about to expose him.

I announced to Elliot loud enough for anyone around us to hear, "This bastard is the reason I didn't know about my daughter's existence for the first year and a half of her life."

Apparently, one of the people standing nearby was my shocked mother. It had been well over a decade since she'd seen me behave the way I just had, so I'm sure she was just as confused as Elliot, especially since she worked with this fucktard. "Christian, what are you saying?" she asked. "Edward Danforth is one of the leading OB/GYNs in our hospital."

"Yes, I know, Mother," I replied calmly, but my voice became increasingly angrier as I explained, "In fact, he was Leila's OB/GYN when she was pregnant with Christina. Leila showed me the ultrasound that she got from Danforth, and she gave him permission to speak with me. She cleared it with his office. He had her written permission to talk with me about her medical records. Any other doctor would have verified that the ultrasound proved that Leila was pregnant, how many weeks, and anything else he could see from it about the fetus. I would have known that it was mine, if he had told me the truth about it. But he lied to me. He told me a flat-out bold-faced lie. He said the ultrasound belonged to another patient and that Leila had forged it because she was mentally ill. And who do you think I believed? My former submissive who had admitted to tricking me into getting her pregnant by punching holes in all my condoms, or a well-respected doctor at Seattle's top hospital? So two years passed, and I didn't know that during that time, Leila gave birth to my daughter. I didn't know she had cancer and was unable to care for my HELPLESS INFANT DAUGHTER! I didn't know that my beautiful, innocent, precious BABY DAUGHTER was living in squalor. If it hadn't been for the courage of that 'mentally deranged lunatic,' as he called her at the time, who fought her disease for the sake of MY DAUGHTER, lived well beyond the few months that any of her cancer specialists expected her to, and finally had the courage to approach my fiancé, I still would not know about MY DAUGHTER! Leila would have died, and Christina would either be dead or in foster care. So that, Mother… that is what I am saying."

The asshole responded to my words, speaking for the first time since I'd confronted him. "This is all a huge misunderstanding. I have no recollection of this person you're referring to, or of speaking with you either. I'm sure you must have me mistaken with someone else."

"Bullshit," I spit. "You know who I am, and you knew who I was two years ago. You're the only Edward Danforth practicing medicine in Seattle, and you are the only OB/GYN who not only treated Leila Williams during her pregnancy but also delivered my daughter. I know exactly who you are, Doctor Danforth," I said condescendingly.

"What possible motivation would I have had to lie to you about something like that?" he asked defensively. He was good, playing this innocent act. But it wasn't going to work for him.

My mother was the next person to speak, and I heard the acid in her tone as she accused him. "You were friends with Elena Lincoln."

Danforth kept up his innocent act, "Well…yes. But so were you, and so was he," he pointed at me. "Mrs. Lincoln was a well-respected member of the community. She even volunteered for your own organization, didn't she, Grace?"

"She was a child molester," my mom announced angrily. Well, shit. We'd been keeping all that out of the public while Aiden continued his investigation into her connections. Outside of the police, who had done a pretty damn good job of keeping things under wraps, and a few other people, nobody knew exactly how Elena had died.

Dad came to the rescue at that moment, "Grace, let's allow Christian and his staff to… clean up the mess here." Dad gave Danforth a disgusted look, as if he were the mess, which was pretty damn accurate, in spite of the overturned table and chairs that had resulted from my attack on the asshole. The funny thing was, Dad didn't even know the half of it. He only knew what I'd just revealed about this asshole lying about the ultrasound. He had no idea that Danforth probably had a girl locked up somewhere at this very moment, just like he'd had Raina locked up a decade ago. I have a feeling that Dad would have been pummeling Danforth himself if he'd known what else this bastard was guilty of.

I motioned to Taylor, who took Danforth by the elbow and led him out of the room. "I want eyes on him constantly," I told Taylor.

As I turned back towards the wedding party, the bride spoke up for the first time. "I want that bastard on the next plane out of here. He never should have been invited to our wedding."

"I'm sorry, Kate, that was my fault," my mom responded. "I didn't know… It seems I don't have very good judgment when it comes to the people I associate with."

I couldn't let her blame herself like that. "Mom, this wasn't your fault," I assured her. "Edward Danforth is really good at making people believe he's a good person. You couldn't have known what he really is. And the same is true of Elena. She was a good friend to you for years. You had no way of knowing…"

"Christian, I know what you're trying to do, son, but it won't work. I will always blame myself for what happened to you." Mom looked around at the few people remaining in the room. Most of the wedding crowd had dispersed and gone to their rooms already. The few who remained were not paying us any attention. "But let's not talk about it right now. Life goes on, and tonight is a reason for celebration, not guilt."

"I'll second that," I told her. I gave her a hug and a kiss on her forehead. "I love you, Mom," I said.

Of course, that made her get all teary-eyed. "I love you, too, son," she sniffled.

As Kate had requested, Edward Danforth was on the next plane out of Fiji, and my sources told me that he had gone straight back home to Seattle. I suspected, and feared, that an innocent girl was being punished for how badly things had gone for him in Fiji, but I hoped that Aiden Westlake's investigation would soon put an end to it, if that was indeed happening. I knew that Raina had called her brother, who was still in Seattle, as soon as she'd gotten to our suite that night, but I had no way of knowing where he was in his investigation.

We spent a couple more days in Fiji, just relaxing on the beach. Christina played in the sand while Ana napped under the shade of a palm tree. Nearby, my sister and her fiancé… yes, Mia and Leo had gotten engaged while here in Fiji… played in the water. I liked Leo. In a short time, he'd quickly become one of the Grey family. Elliot and Kate were off somewhere doing their own thing… which probably meant that Kate had him tied up somewhere, but hey, to each their own. They were going to be here for a few more days before leaving for Australia for an extended honeymoon. Mom and Dad were both relaxed and happy, and we chatted idly as we watched Christina play in the sand. We agreed not to talk about any of the heavy shit until we got home. Nearby, our fleet of security officers stood guard, so I felt assured that all my loved ones were safe. Life was pretty fucking good. I could get used to this.

Then, it seemed like I blinked, and we were back in Seattle, back to reality. Thankfully though, my princess was home too, so even though I went back to work running Ismintis and keeping up with Ros about everything going on at GEH, I was OK because Ana was OK. In fact, she was better than OK. She still wasn't eating enough, but she was eating. She still didn't have her usual amount of energy, but she was awake and alert. She still wasn't as bubbly as I'd seen her in the past, but she was smiling again. She really was going to be OK.

I insisted on going with her to her doctor's appointment that Monday afternoon, and even though I was alarmed by how much weight she had lost when they weighed her, as her surgeon examined her, I was happy at the positive report he gave. He apparently was not surprised or alarmed by her weight loss. He said it was typical. He said her incisions were healing very nicely, and he expected her to make a full recovery. I was also shocked at my girl's candid questions.

"Do I really have to wait six weeks to have sex?" she asked Dr. Perkins bluntly.

The doctor replied, "It's not a hard and fast rule, but you need to be recovered enough for sexual activity so you don't risk further injury."

"Am I recovered enough?" she pressed him.

"Well, I'd say by your… persistence in questioning me… you're getting there. It hasn't quite been four weeks yet, though." He pressed her pelvis, making her wince slightly. "How does this feel?" he asked. "How painful, on a scale of one to ten, with ten being the most painful?"

"Maybe a four? It still hurts, but not like it did," she answered honestly. "The thing is… I feel like I'm going out of my mind sometimes I'm so… umm… anyway… Is it possible for Christian and me to… umm… be gentle and avoid any of the problems you're worried about?"

The doctor maintained his serious, professional composure, and so did I. I wanted to hear his answer, and I wasn't going to say anything to embarrass my girl even more than she already was. The doctor looked her in the eye and answered in a professional tone, "You really shouldn't have sexual intercourse for at least another week, at least not with full penetration, and even then, I'd advise you to wait a little longer. However, if you are suffering, then masturbation or oral sex is permissible. But only if you are gentle and very conscious of your injuries."

I wanted to make sure I heard him correctly, "So you're saying it's OK for me to get her off?"

He smiled, but remained professional. "Yes, but very gently. Be careful with her."

Oh, hell, yes, I would be careful with her. I could hardly wait to taste her pussy again, and I could see by how her breath quickened and her eyes dilated that she was thinking the same thing. She was craving my tongue as much as I was craving her taste.

"How many orgasms can I have each day? Is there a limit?" Ana asked the doctor impatiently.

The doctor's eyebrows shot up, and he totally lost his professional demeanor. His face reddened, and then he shook his head and chuckled before he replied, "I have to admit, Ms. Steele, nobody has ever asked me that before. How about this? If you are able, limit your orgasms to one per day for the next week. If, and I stress the word IF, when we examine you next week, you are even more recovered and feeling… umm.. up to it… then you can increase your number of… umm.. orgasms each day. You may very well be ready for… umm… penetration… by then."

I knew the fucker wanted to ask her how many orgasms she normally had in a typical day, but he was too professional to ask. Instead he told her, "I think it's safe to assume that your counseling sessions are going well. Often, victims of sexual trauma take months or even years to have any desire for sexual intercourse again. You are… exceptional."

"That she is," I agreed. I wasn't feeling threatened by the doctor. For one thing, his behavior and tone were still very professional, and he wasn't being flirtatious, even in that final comment. For another thing, Dr. Cecil Perkins was old enough to be our father, or possibly even our grandfather. But I still wanted him give him a gentle reminder that she was mine.

Ana smiled at me sweetly, and then the asked the doctor, "Are we done here?"

Dr. Perkins smiled, still very professionally, and replied. "That we are. Until next week." He moved toward the door, but then turned back and said to me, "Remember, be gentle. I don't want to see any new injuries next week." Then he walked out the door before either of us could respond.

Once we had left the office and were in the back of my SUV, and Taylor was driving us back to Grey Manor, Ana began an act of seduction that was totally unnecessary because I already wanted her more than she could ever imagine. Not that I was complaining. She started out by putting her hand on my knee and rubbing my leg, and then continued upwards until she reached my cock. Then she stroked my cock.

I had to stop her there before I blew my load in my pants. "Ana, Princess. It's been weeks. I won't last if you do that."

"I want you, Christian," she said lustfully.

"I know, baby," I responded. "I want you too, but we still can't fuck. We've got to take it easy. But rest assured, my love, I'm going to get you off before this day is done. But I don't want your first orgasm after all that you've been through to be in the back of our car."

That was when I had a moment of clarity. I knew where her next orgasm needed to happen. "Taylor, take us to Lake Washington Boulevard." I knew he'd get my reference.

Thankfully, Taylor had driven north after leaving the hospital in Seattle and taken Highway 520, so we were actually closer to our new house than we were to Bellevue. When we crossed the bridge, passed Hunt's Point, and headed north instead of south, Ana looked out the window curiously. But she was more focused on the circles I was tracing on her wrist and arm, and my gentle kisses to her hand every few minutes. I knew how to seduce her too, and she was putty in my hands.

When we drove through the gate and Ana got a look at the property for the first time, she turned to me wide-eyed and said, "This is the house you bought, isn't it?

Now I felt nervous, because I really wanted her to love it. "Yes," I answered. "If you hate it, we'll… "

"I don't hate it," she interrupted. "I love the location, and I love the meadow we just drove past." She looked around and added, "I love the view of the lake. Is there a boathouse?"

"There is," I answered.

"We never did make it out on your boat," she reminded me.

"We will as soon as you're ready," I promised her.

"I'd like that," she said. As she spoke, we stopped in front of the main house. "It's a beautiful house." She smiled at me and looked so excited that I felt like I was on top of the world.

"Well, let's see it then," I said.

I helped her out of the car and held her hand as we entered the house. The foyer opened into a large open living space that included a sitting area, dining area, and state-of-the-art kitchen. The entire area except for the kitchen was two stories, with floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the lake. To one side of the room, a marble staircase led up to what I knew to be bedrooms. On the opposite side of the room, another marble staircase led down to what would be a game room, home theater, and indoor swimming pool.

Ana's eyes were about to pop out of her head, and she wasn't saying anything. I wasn't sure if this was good or bad. I told her, "If you love the location but hate the house, we can tear it down and…"

"It's perfect, Christian," she silenced me. "Everything I am looking at is absofuckinglutely perfect. I love this house. I could not have designed anything more perfect myself. This feels like a dream, it's so perfect."

"Really?" I asked her.

"Really," she replied.

"You haven't even seen it all yet," I told her.

"Well… show me then," she suggested.

Still feeling nervous, I took on the role of a real estate agent. "Well, as you can see, this is the main living area. I think this is where we will spend the bulk of our time. When we aren't in the bedroom, of course." I smiled flirtatiously at her, which made her breath quicken as it had in the doctor's office. I could see her nipples protruding through her thin blouse. "You should have worn a thicker blouse today, Princess," I told her. "Or a jacket."

She saw me ogling her breasts and replied nonchalantly, "It feels pretty warm in here to me."

I took her hand, caressing it gently, and I led her to the other rooms on this floor. "This is where we will have our library," I told her. It was a large room, two stories like the great room, with windows overlooking the lake. I envisioned floor to ceiling bookshelves on two walls, and comfortable sofas for reading.

"I can see that," Ana responded. "We can make it look like the library in Beauty and the Beast. Christina will love that when she's older."

I didn't have a clue what she was referring to, but if she was happy, I was happy. I took her hand again and led her to the next room, a smaller room that adjoined the library. "This will be your private study." It was the perfect size for a personal study, and it had a window seat that also overlooked the lake. I could see from the look on her face that she loved it.

Next door to that was the room that I envisioned for my own study. The two rooms shared a small washroom. When I complained that it didn't have a shower, Ana reminded me that we would take a shower in our master bathroom before coming down here.

The main floor also had another larger fancy looking washroom that Ana referred to as a powder room, and a bedroom with a private bathroom that we agreed would be a good guestroom. There were also rooms behind the kitchen that we would find convenient as our family grew: a huge pantry, a laundry room, and another room that would make a perfect security room.

"Upstairs or downstairs?" I asked Ana as we had finished viewing all the rooms on the main floor.

"Where's our bedroom?" she asked suggestively.

I laughed. "So impatient, future Mrs. Grey. You do realize, don't you, that much like the rest of the house, it doesn't have any furniture yet."

"I don't care," she replied. "I want you."

I led her up the stairs to the second floor. Much of this space was open to below, but it also included the master suite, which was made up of a large bedroom with a sitting area that overlooked the lake, two walk-in closets that were each larger than my childhood bedroom at my parents' house, and a lavish bathroom with a huge soaker tub and walk-in shower. The shower was large enough for my whole family and had three showerheads, including an overhead rain shower, and some high-tech looking jets. It was so fancy that I knew we'd need to get instructions for how to use it.

"Damn! Can we take a shower now?" Ana asked. I was happy that she seemed so impressed.

"I don't think the house has any hot water at the moment," I told her. "There are a few repairs we'll need to make before we can move in. Nothing major though, unless you want…"

"No, nothing major," she agreed as we walked back into the bedroom. "I love it as it is."

I smiled happily. "I'm very happy to hear that."

"Good," she said, as she turned around and embraced me. "Now… I need you to fuck me, Mr. Grey. Where do you think we'll put the bed?"

I kissed her gently but passionately before I replied, "probably between those two windows. And you know I can't fuck you. Not yet. But I'm going to blow your mind. Do you like this carpet?"

"I've never been a big fan of carpet, but it's OK," she answered before she kissed me again. I made a mental note to hire a designer to change out the flooring.

I took a step back from her and said, "I think it's time for me to rock your world, Princess." And then, in my Dom voice, I commanded her, "Strip." She wanted a Dom, so that was exactly what I was going to give her. A gentle Dom.

Her eyes dilated, and she obeyed me immediately. Within probably three seconds, she was naked before me, her clothes scattered all over the room. I pretended to be irritated as I said, "Next time, I want more of a show. You're too impatient. I seem to recall something about delayed orgasms when you were trying to seduce me in Hawaii. Was it five or six?"

"No, please, Master," she begged. "Please don't… not right now."

"Shh…" I pressed my finger to her lips to shush her. "Anastasia, are you wearing a collar?" I asked.

"No, but I want to be," she insisted. "Can we… imagine it? If you'd worn a tie today, we could use that."

I pretended to be irritated again as I asked her, "Do you really want me to be your Dom?"

"Yes!" she insisted.

"In that case, there will be no topping from the bottom. You will do as I command without question, or you will use a safe word. I choose when to collar you, and what to use when I collar you. If you aren't wearing a collar, you can't call me master. Right now, you will call me Christian. But I'm still your Dom. Make no mistake about that. Now, kneel."

She fell to her knees and looked up at me in expectation. She was glowing and radiant, and, my God, so fucking beautiful. I knew what she wanted, so I gave it to her. "Take out my cock and show me what you've got, Princess," I commanded her.

Did she ever show me what she had! Holy shit! There was nobody on earth who could give a blowjob like Anastasia Steele. I had to stop her, because I was determined that she would come before me. I pulled away from her, and she looked up at me in disappointment.

"Now, now, none of that," I told her. "It's my turn. Lie down and show me what's mine."

Anastasia lay down on the floor, bent her knees, and spread her legs wide. My God, I was even more amazed at her now than I had been by that blowjob. It had not even been a month since she was brutally raped, and she was trusting me like this. I was in awe of her. I felt tears coming to my eyes, and I had to stop them. So I didn't waste another minute before I took everything that she was offering me. I knelt between her knees and leaned over her, first kissing her lips tenderly and reverently. "I love you, Anastasia soon-to-be Grey." Then I took her breast in my mouth and sucked it tenderly, making her moan.

"Please, Christian!" she cried out.

"What do you want, Princess?" I asked her.

"You can't give me what I want yet according to my fucking doctor, but I'll take whatever you give me. I love you too."

Before her words of love were completely out of her mouth, I kissed her pussy in much the same way that I had just kissed her lips. My God, my tongue would never get tired of licking her. She was delicious and responsive and perfect. When I sucked her clit, she came undone. Holy shit! It had taken her under a minute to reach an orgasm. I'd expected to come with her in a sixty-nine, but I hadn't even gotten into that position yet. My girl was so ready, she couldn't hold back. Any other time, I would have kept working her, bringing her to a few more orgasms, but Dr. Perkins had said only one per day, so we had to stop.

I stood up and smiled down at her sprawled out on the floor. I could see that she wanted more, and so did I, but we couldn't yet. She wanted me to fuck her properly, and I wanted that too. I wondered if we could have this house ready in a week's time, so that our first fuck could be right here in this room, in our bed, our first night here. I determined to make it happen.

I reached for her hand and helped her up. "What about you?" she asked, indicating my hard-on. I'd decided when she came before I was ready for her to that I'd let it go. Years of experience had taught me how to wait. But she wanted me to come as much as I wanted to, and I wasn't going to disappoint her, even if she was topping from the bottom again. At the moment, I didn't give a shit.

"Kneel again and finish me off. I want you to swallow every drop."

I was a goner in only a couple of minutes, screaming out my undying love for her as I lost my load down her perfect throat. And when I saw the satisfied smirk on her face as we got dressed, I knew that my girl was going to be OK. Nothing about this experience had reminding her of her trauma. She was thinking only of me and of our love.

Before we left there, we checked out the rest of the house. On the next floor up, there were four bedrooms, all with private bathrooms. These would be our children's rooms. All four bedrooms opened to a common area that we agreed would be the perfect play or study area for our children. We both liked the fact that anyone would have to get past our bedroom on the second floor before they could get to our children's rooms on the third floor. We decided which one we'd get ready for Christina now, and Ana talked about how she wanted to decorate it. I'd give both of them the world, whatever they wanted.

Then, we took the elevator down to the bottom floor. After making out again in the elevator, we stepped out into a large area that I knew would be perfect for a game room, where I knew we'd set up a pool table, ping pong table, maybe air hockey, and whatever else the hell we wanted. Anastasia was very impressed by the indoor pool, which we agreed was perfect for rainy Seattle. We were both also happy with the home theater with surround sound, which I was happy to point out would double as a safe room. There were two more bedrooms down here, which we decided we could use as additional guest rooms for now. There was also a wine cellar and additional storage space.

Before we left, we also checked out the outdoor space. There was a huge deck off the main floor with stairs that led down to the lower patio area, which was even larger. There was enough space for an outdoor pool, if we wanted to add one, but we agreed that we didn't think we needed it. The five-car garage impressed Ana until I reminded her that I owned nearly twice that many cars myself, and she owned two so far (and would soon own more, but I didn't tell her that). We would need more garage space. Luckily, there was enough space to build another garage twice the size of this one. The current garage had a large 3-bedroom apartment that would be perfect for Taylor. I knew he was planning to ask Gail to marry him, and that they already shared a bed. I also knew that he really wanted his daughter Sophia to live with him, and there would be plenty of space for her too.

I told Ana that I wanted to build a few studio or 1-bedroom apartments in the new garage so that we could have more full-time staff live there, and she liked the idea. Ana also loved the boathouse as much as I did. It was a rustic space, but I knew we could make it nicer. It would be great for entertaining.

All in all, I'd say that the house was a success. The smile on my girl's face said it all. This was home. I was home. I'd never felt more content in my entire life.

On our way back to my parents' house, Ana and I decided that it was time to tell our family not only about our new house but also about our plans for the merger and the foundation. First, though, I wanted to talk to Ros about the merger. I was a little nervous about how she'd take it, even though she'd been expecting it.

That conversation went much better than I had feared. It turned out, Ros had been wondering what was taking us so long. She had seen the handwriting on the wall almost from the beginning. She also told me that she was hoping that there would be additional executive staff, particularly support staff for her, so that she would be able to work normal hours. She was perfectly happy to keep her position as COO of Ismintis-Grey Enterprises, and that was truly all she wanted.

After Ana and I had agreed to merge, I hadn't mentioned my earlier idea of giving Ros a percentage of GEH, but I was a little worried that Ros might feel shorted somehow. My worries were unfounded. Ros was happy, and my promise to give her the raise that Ana and I had agreed to made her even happier. The icing on the cake for her was my additional promise to open a daycare center for employees. She and Gwen were ready to put their son in daycare, so the timing was perfect.

Ana and I waited until the next day, Tuesday, to announce our merger to our family. They were all over the moon. Everyone thought it was a great idea. Of course, they were all family, so of course they would be supportive. After we had spoken with our family at breakfast that morning, including Ana's dad, we then spoke to the executive teams of both companies. We called a meeting at both companies, and we both attended both meetings. Ana's staff seemed overjoyed to see her again, and they all showed support for the merger, especially when they were assured that they were all keeping their jobs. My GEH staff were not quite as overjoyed, especially with the name change, but I really didn't give a fuck about their opinions. I only needed them to keep doing their jobs and doing them well. I knew we'd keep growing, and their jobs would be safe if they kept doing what they were supposed to do. We instructed our staff to keep things under wraps for the time being because we didn't want to make a public announcement about the merger until the end of the year. We planned to have a huge, blow-out New Year's Eve party for both companies where we'd announce our merger to the world.

All in all, November ended on a much better note than it had begun. Even more good news came on the last day of the month, when Ana got a call from Raina. They had come back to Seattle the day after the wedding, mainly to be a part of Aiden's investigation into Edward Danforth. According to Raina, Aiden had finally been able to get a search warrant, and the FBI had just located the room that day… Raina believed it was undoubtedly the same room where she had been held captive for years since Aiden's research indicated that Danforth had lived in the same mansion for at least fifteen years. In the room, a sixteen-year-old girl had been found, battered, bruised, and unconscious, but very much alive. Danforth had been arrested immediately.

Raina was on speaker phone, so I heard her when she told Ana, "One down, three to go, and we know who the fourth one is. Horowitz. And we think we know where he is. Thailand. We're trying to smoke him out. We're also hoping that we can put some pressure on Danforth, so he'll give up the name of the bastard who sold me to him."

"What's going to happen to the girl?" I asked Raina.

"Addison Phillips. She has a name, and her name is Addison Phillips," Raina told me. "And the answer is that it's a process. Ken learned the hard way… three times… that you can't just set these girls free and let them go on their merry way. They need support. A lot depends on Addison, and a lot of factors, like how long she's been in captivity, how much she remembers, whether she has a support network. Right now, I'm her support network. I'm all she has until she recovers enough to tell me about her family, if she has one that she can remember, or if Aiden can find them through his connections.

Ana looked at me, but she didn't speak. She didn't have to. I knew exactly what she was thinking, and it pissed me the fuck off. We had to help these girls. But I still didn't want to put our name out there, putting ourselves at risk. It worried the fuck out of me.

When Ana got off the phone, she embraced me, kissed me, and then told me something that will stay with me for the rest of my life. "I want you to imagine something. Imagine that somewhere in America tonight, a family is getting a phone call. They're being told that their child, who has been missing for a year, two years, three years… whatever… she's been found. She's alive. Somewhere, those parents are overjoyed because their daughter, Addison Phillips, who they thought was dead, is alive. She's hurt, and she's going to need a lot of support, but she's alive. Now… jump ahead fifteen years in time. What if we were those parents, and what if that child were Christina Grey? And what if you could have done something to prevent it now, but you didn't because you were too afraid of the very thing that ended up happening anyway?"

Well, shit.


	48. Ch 48: Meeting Elizabeth Carter (APOV)

**Chapter 48: Meeting Elizabeth Carter (Anastasia's POV)**

The following Monday morning, Christian woke me up more pleasantly than I could have ever imagined, with his tongue. Holy shit! Every day for the past week, he had chosen a different time of day to have our special time. While I was extremely relieved that Dr. Perkins had permitted us to do this much, I was frustrated that it couldn't be more, and I sincerely hoped that he was going to give us permission later today to go further. I wanted Christian all the time. I needed more than just one orgasm per day. My libido was through the roof, and our once per day time of bonding was only making me crave more.

"Hmmmm" I hummed. "Good morning to you too!" The last word came out more as a pant, as he sucked my clit into his mouth. My God, this man knew how to use his tongue… and his lips, and even his teeth. I'd say cunnilingus was one of his greatest talents, and he had many talents. Have I mentioned how much I love Christian Grey? And I let him know it too, as he pushed me off the cliff and made me soar above the earth. Holy shit! That was an amazing orgasm!

When I came down enough to catch my breath, I told him, "You know I'm just going to want you all day now. My God, I hope Dr. Perkins clears us to do more."

He smiled at me. "You know you're beautiful when you're horny."

"I'm always horny," I lamented.

"You're always beautiful," he added. Then he flipped me over, smacked my ass, and said, "Get up. I want my daily blowjob in the shower today." That got me out of the bed.

Later, as we had breakfast, we talked through our plans for going to Michigan this week to meet Christian's grandmother. We were planning to leave tonight, after putting Christina to bed at Grey Manor. We would sleep on the airplane and get to Detroit early Tuesday morning. Christian had expected it to take longer to make all the arrangements, but he had pulled some strings to be able to visit Elizabeth Carter in the prison. He'd been working on it since finding out about her existence, and it had helped that Carrick was friends with the governor of Michigan, who had been instrumental in arranging for both of us to visit her on a weekday morning, which apparently was never done. According to Christian, it would probably take us about an hour to drive to the prison once we landed in Detroit. I felt anxious for Christian because he had no idea what to expect from his grandmother. We'd both read her letters, and she seemed like a woman who had loved her family and had never recovered from losing them. I could only imagine what she'd been through. She didn't write anything at all about prison life. All of her letters were about her life before prison. So we weren't sure what her living conditions had been for the past 25 years. Christian was nervous about their meeting, but he was keeping so busy running my company and his that he didn't talk about it much.

Even though I wasn't working, I'd kept busy the past week, mostly wedding planning, caring for Christina, and having extended counseling sessions with Deepa, who was pleased that I'd taken off work for the rest of the year. She seemed satisfied with my progress, and so was I. Thankfully, I hadn't had anymore nightmares since Hawaii, but then again, I'd been sleeping with Christian every night since then, and I think maybe he was just as much my dreamcatcher as he claimed I was his. During my Skype sessions with Deepa while in Hawaii, I'd described my attack to her at length. I hadn't held anything back. I'd gotten past my feelings of not being good enough for Christian or worthy of his love, and I was no longer afraid that he wouldn't want me anymore. More than anything, I just needed Christian to fuck me. It was more than just my body craving his, although that was a very real part of it. I needed him emotionally. I needed him to be physically inside me, where I'd been violated, to heal me spiritually and emotionally.

I had a busy day ahead before we left for our trip, and it didn't help that I wasn't feeling great. Since my ordeal, I had good days and bad days. Some days, my appetite was more back to normal. I actually felt hungry when I needed to eat. But other days, I felt like I had a knot in my stomach, and this was one of those days. In fact, after Christian left for work, I vomited. I hadn't been sick to my stomach until now, and I hoped it was just due to something I'd eaten. Because of how I was feeling, my morning task of finishing up with wedding planning took more out of me than I expected it to. Later, I still needed to go to my doctor's appointment in the afternoon, and then back to Grey Manor to spend time with Christina before we left for Michigan.

Over the past couple of weeks, I'd completed almost all of my wedding planning. We were determined to keep our date of February 25, and I was doing all I could to make sure we had everything we wanted. In just the past few days, we'd narrowed down our choices for our catering menu, floral arrangements, and so many other details including even the type of china that we would use to serve guests their meals. This morning, I focused on our printed program design, which ended up being very similar to our invitations. Then, I had a late morning meeting with my wedding planner, Lavette Stacks.

Since we had already chosen our invitations, all I needed to do was give the guest list to Lavette. She'd already sent out "save the date" cards, and within the week, she would send out our invitations. Thankfully, Christian and I had finalized our guest list over the past week. We'd been able to trim our list down to 300 people, which was still more than I had originally intended, but I was OK with that.

Last week, I'd met with Kate's mom and finalized the design for my dress, as well as a very cute matching one for Christina. Also, while in Fiji, I'd discussed colors and flowers with Kate and Mia, so I already knew the dress I wanted to order for them. As soon as Kate returned from her honeymoon, we would order them. Christian and I agreed that Kate, Elliot, Mia and Leo would be our only attendants. Kate and Mia were going to wear slate gray dresses and carry bouquets of yellow Gerber daisies. Franco had been part of one of our discussions in Fiji, and he was already working on a design for my hair which would also incorporate daisies to match my bouquet. If Christina cooperated, he would do a matching updo for her, also with daisies. The guys would all wear black tuxedos with bowties and waistcoats the same shade of gray as the bridesmaid dresses, and they would each have a yellow daisy boutonniere.

Christian had been funny when he'd overheard Kate, Mia and me discussing wedding colors in Fiji. When he heard me tell them I wanted the dresses to be gray because I wanted very colorful floral arrangements and I was afraid brightly colored dresses would clash with the bouquets, Christian had chimed in. "You could always go with Steele-Grey. That's a great color."

Mia had actually googled it and found out that there really is such a color, but it was darker than I wanted. I think Christian was a little disappointed that we'd gone with a different shade of gray, but not enough to complain. Ultimately, almost everything about our wedding was up to me. He kept reinforcing that by insisting that he just wanted to be married, and he wanted me to be happy.

Another thing we'd figured out in Fiji was who would officiate our wedding. Apparently, Carrick had a close friend from law school who was a judge now, and he agreed to ask him to do it. He'd confirmed with us last week that his friend, Judge Marvin Novero, had agreed to do it.

Christian had saved the day by choosing our venue. I was freaking out while we were in Fiji because none of the venues I'd researched were available on February 25. I'd known it would be hard to find a place large enough at such late notice, but I had hoped something would have had a cancellation or something, but no such luck. We knew we didn't want to change the date from February 25, so I wasn't sure what we were going to do.

"Why don't we have it at the Mile High Club?" Christian had suggested.

"It's not large enough," I answered. "The restaurant only holds… what, maybe a hundred people?"

"Not the restaurant, the night club. Well, actually, we can use both. We can clear out the tables in the restaurant and set it up for the ceremony. With that kind of seating, it will easily hold 300 people. Then, after the ceremony, people can just go down to the club for the reception. We can close both of them for the entire week. That will give our staff plenty of time to change out the tables and add more to the club. We want to have round tables that seat what, eight people? The club is large enough to fit 40 tables, and I don't think we'll need that many. You know not all 300 people we invite will show up, but even if they did, we'd only need 38 tables. It's more likely that 36 will be enough in the end. And there will still be a large enough dance floor. There's a stage too, so if we want to have a live band, that will work. We'll close them both, so you'll have time for your decorators to do all you want them to. They can transform the whole place so it feels less like a night club. Unless you want that. They can decorate it however you want."

"Are you sure there's enough room for 40 tables?" I asked skeptically.

"Have you been there?" he asked. "It's huge."

"I've only been to the restaurant, not the night club," I admitted.

Christian had remedied that one day last week, while the club was closed. He'd shown me around and envisioned with me how we could move things around to accommodate our wedding crowd and decorate the place to make it have the kind of ambiance I wanted for our wedding. It didn't take much for him to convince me.

"You realize how romantic you're being, right?" I teased him.

"Anastasia, I'm not…"

"You ARE!" I insisted. "You are probably the most romantic man I've ever met. You sent me flowers the day after you met me, the day after you swore to me that you NEVER did hearts or flowers. And not only that, but they were my favorite flowers, which you remembered. And now, you chose the venue of our wedding… to be the very place where we met for the first time. The very place where you claim you fell in love with me. Christian… it couldn't be more romantic. Or more perfect."

His only response to that was to kiss me and tell me that I'm the one who's perfect. Did I mention that I love Christian Grey? Did I mention that he's the one who's perfect?

Anyway, I went over all our plans that we'd made so far with Lavette, and then made a list of things we still needed to do, which included cake tasting and making a schedule for dress fittings. We still needed to hire a band, too. Lavette suggested that I ask Christian to let that be his job, and I thought she made an excellent point.

Soon after Lavette had gone, I left for my doctor's appointment. Christian was meeting me there, so Dre and Sam drove me. I was feeling a bit nervous about this appointment. I didn't want to admit to the doctor that I was still feeling nauseated or that I'd thrown up that very morning. I didn't want Christian to know about it, and I wasn't going to tell the doctor. Overall, I believed I was healing well, and I didn't want to give Dr. Perkins any excuse for prolonging my purgatory. I needed him to clear me for sexual activity.

Unfortunately, Dr. Perkins didn't let me get away with keeping my nausea a secret. "Nurse Veronica tells me that you're still having trouble eating," he said.

"It's improving," I told him. I believed it was truly getting better. True, I felt nauseated at some point pretty much every day, but then it went away and I was able to eat.

"Have you had any vomiting, or just nausea?" he asked. Damn it! Should I lie, or admit the truth?

"Anastasia?" Christian asked, in a warning tone. Shit! I guess I paused too long, and Christian read me. Now, I knew I couldn't get away with anything but the truth.

"I threw up this morning, but I feel fine now," I admitted.

"What?!" Christian shouted. "Why didn't you tell me?" He had already left for work, and I didn't think he needed to know.

"I haven't seen you since before then. And besides, it's not really a big deal. I feel fine."

Dr. Perkins pressed my pelvis much like he had the previous week. I barely felt any pain, and I told him so.

"Do you feel any nausea right now?" the doctor asked.

"Not at all," I responded. "I feel terrific."

"Hmm…" the doctor said as he looked thoughtful. "In that case… maybe it was something you ate. You're still healing, so it's to be expected for you to still feel some lack of appetite, or for you to have occasional bad reactions to certain foods. I'm not concerned if that's all it is. But you need to tell your nurse if this problem persists."

"I will," I promised. "But I feel fine, really."

"And how is the…umm… sexual side of things going? Still feeling… good?" My poor doctor was blushing. I could see that he was trying to be professional, but he was a surgeon, not accustomed to talking about orgasms with a horny young couple.

I answered him bluntly. To hell with his embarrassment. I was embarrassed to talk about this too, but I needed to fuck. "No, I'm not feeling good, because I need to have sex. One orgasm a day is not enough. Christian is not going to touch me without your clearance. We really need you to give us the green light for penetration." I glanced at Christian, who was trying hard to keep a straight face. I knew he was shocked by my audacity, just like he had been last week, and he wanted to laugh at me for almost begging the doctor to let us fuck.

"Have you experienced any pain with your orgasms over the past week?" the doctor asked.

"No, not the kind you mean," I answered. "Only… frustration at not being able to continue."

Dr. Perkins nodded in approval before he said, "In that case, you have my green light, but I want you to think of it like driving a car through a school zone. You still need to keep things at a…umm… slow speed. Keep it gentle."

"But you're saying full penetration is OK?" Christian clarified.

"Yes," Dr. Perkins replied. "As long as Ms. Steele is not feeling any pain, and as long as you keep things gentle."

"How many orgasms can I have?" I asked.

My question didn't throw him off as it had last week. He seemed to be expecting it. "As many as you want, as long as you aren't feeling any pain."

I couldn't hold back my joy. I smiled widely and said, "Yes! Thank you! Thank you so much, Dr. Perkins!"

The doctor smiled back at me kindly, but he cautioned me. "Ms. Steele, I have never encountered a patient as eager as you are to… resume sexual activity so quickly after surgery, much less one who had so recently been the victim of such a violent sexual trauma. Please remember… you have got to take things slowly. You really must pace yourself."

Christian spoke up. "I can assure you, doctor, I will make sure that we are taking things slowly. Anastasia's full recovery is my first priority."

"Very well then," the doctor replied. "Since you're doing so well… I think we can skip our appointment next week. I don't need to see you for two weeks. Unless, of course, something comes up before then. If you continue to have trouble with prolonged nausea, and particularly if you keep vomiting. Otherwise, I'll see you in two weeks."

I felt giddy as we made our way back to the SUV. We could fuck! Yes! I was so excited that I didn't pay much attention to the fact that Christian was speaking with Taylor and Dre, who was driving my Rolls Royce. I only noticed how fine Christian's physique was. He had to be the sexiest man I'd ever seen. I wanted to jump his bones right here, right now.

As he turned back to me to help me get in the car, he caught me checking him out, and he smirked at me. "Like what you see?" he asked.

I smirked back at him. "Other than the fact that you have too many clothes on, yes, I do."

As Taylor drove us out of Seattle and back towards Bellevue, Christian turned towards me in the car and said, "Anastasia, I need to ask you something, and I need you to be perfectly honest."

His question scared me a little, mainly because of his tone. Was he going to bring up my nausea again? Was he going to refuse to fuck me because I'd puked this morning and then tried to keep it from him? "Of course," I answered him, putting on a brave face.

"Relax, Princess," he said gently, smiling warmly at me. "I just need to know… are you certain that you want a Dom? Is that what you need from me? Because I want to make sure you realize this, Anastasia… I'll take you however I can have you. If you want vanilla, we'll have the best fucking vanilla you've ever imagined. If you want kink, I'll give you kink. What do you want, Princess?"

"I want YOU, Christian," I answered fervently, but I admitted, "But yes, I crave kink."

"Do you want to be restrained?" Christian asked.

"By you, yes, I'll enjoy that," I responded. "I want to play. I want to practice Kinbaku. But only if that's what you want too. I don't want you to feel pressured. I believe you're a Dom, that it is just who you are, and I really enjoy playing the role of a sub. I get real fulfillment from giving up control to you. My rape hasn't changed that. But if you don't want that kind of relationship, then I'm OK with vanilla too.

"I think we both like vanilla sometimes too," Christian pointed out. "We can have both. We don't have to choose. But the D/s thing is going to have to be very different than it was before. We aren't going to play in a playroom again. I can't, Anastasia, and I don't think you can either. But we can ask Ken and Raina to teach us Kinbaku. We don't need a playroom for that. We can improvise."

"Yes, I'd like that," I agreed.

"We need to talk about limits. We both have new ones now. I don't know exactly what that bastard did or what might trigger… the memory of it. I know that a Saint Andrews Cross is a hard limit for me now."

"A spanking bench is a hard limit for me," I admitted.

"Agreed," Christian said. "Can we… talk about what he did to you?"

I nodded, even though I didn't really want to. "What do you want to know?"

"You've told me he… violated you… when you were strapped to the spanking bench. So… it was from behind. Is it a hard limit… to be fucked from behind?"

I had to consider that. "I… don't know. You're… not him. I'm not sure if it will be a trigger. I can't imagine that… confusing you with… him. I don't know."

"Did he fuck you on the Saint Andrews Cross?" Christian asked.

I felt tears coming to my eyes, and I tried to hold them back. "I… don't think so. I was… in and out… I passed out. And then… it was all over. I think he probably would have. But… I don't think he… had a chance… before Leila killed him."

Christian sighed and rubbed my arm. "Hey…" he said, making me look up at him, blinking back my tears. "I'm sorry," he said. "I don't want to make you relive it. I just… need to know what your new limits are. But it's OK, Princess. We will cross that bridge when we come to it."

"He raped my ass," I blurted out.

Christian sucked in his breath. "He sodomized you," he stated tersely. "I'm sorry, love. I'm so sorry you went through that."

"He was… talking to you… to the fucking video camera. He was bragging about… claiming me before killing me, so I'd always be… his. Fucking bastard sack of shit."

Christian looked out the window, bringing my attention to our surroundings. I noticed that we were headed north, and I realized happily that we were headed back towards our new house.

Christian looked back at me again and stated, "So, your ass is a hard limit too."

"No," I objected. "I want you to claim me again. I need you to. But… I'm not sure I'm ready for that or if you can do it gently. It might need to wait. Until you can fuck me… hard."

"Do you want…" Christian stopped and cleared his throat. I could see that he was contemplating. But then he went ahead and finished his question. "Do you want to have a public collaring ceremony?"

I had not even considered that. "Do you?" I asked him.

"I asked you first," he answered with a smirk.

I sighed and thought about it. "A public collaring… What would that… entail? Who would be there? Where would we do it? We can't go to a play party without encountering… triggers. I'm not… completely opposed to the idea. But I'm not… excited about it either. Can we take some time to think about it? Wait until the new year to make any decisions about it?"

Christian nodded. "Yes, and if it makes you feel any better, I feel exactly the same way. I'm not sure it's a good idea, but I'm not certain it's a bad idea either. That's why I wanted you to decide. I still want you to decide. If you want it, you have to ask me for it. I won't bring it up again. It's up to you. And I won't fuck your ass until you ask me to, either way."

We'd arrived at our new house, and Christian got out and helped me out of the car. "I have a few things I want to show you," he told me. "I'd planned to have the house ready for us to move in today, but it still needs a few things, and besides, we're going to be in Michigan for the rest of this week. But I've gotten a few things done in the past week. I need you to be honest with me about how you like everything, and if you want to change anything, just tell me."

We walked through the house in much the same way as we had the previous week. Christian had added brand new state of the art appliances to the kitchen. The refrigerator was the fanciest thing I'd ever seen. He had also added shelves to our library, as well as both of our studies. They were ready to have books added.

"I considered buying sofas for both the living area and the library, but I decided that I wanted to pick out that furniture with you. So we can do that when we get back from our trip. Or even while we're gone if you want to shop online for it."

"We can shop online," I agreed. "I prefer that."

"Good. Now, come with me." Christian took my hand and led me up to the second floor. I noticed immediately that he'd had all the carpet ripped out and replaced with parquet hardwood floors, just like the first floor. It was beautiful.

"When did you have time for this?" I asked him.

"I ordered it last Tuesday. They finished it on Saturday."

"Damn, that was fast!" I exclaimed.

He nodded. "I paid them extra. I'd wanted us to move in today."

He opened the door to our bedroom and led me inside. "How do you like it?" he asked.

Holy shit! The room was completely finished, with dark mahogany furniture, beautiful linens and drapery, and even new paint on the walls. Last week, they'd been white. Now, they were bluish-gray or grayish-blue, I wasn't sure which, but it was very calming, and it contrasted with the furniture perfectly.

"I love it," I answered in awe. "This is amazing. How did you do this in only a week?"

"I hired people to do it," he answered simply. "They're not done with the closets. I'm having custom built-ins put in. It's taking longer since Elliot isn't here to supervise them. But he'll be back later this week, so he'll have a chance to inspect everything before we move in. They're still working on the water heaters too. We'd ordered one kind, but then we decided to change to a different kind. Solar hybrid."

"In Seattle?" I questioned. "Will we get enough sunlight to power a solar water heater?"

"They'll work," Christian assured me. "Even when the weather is overcast, it will still work."

"I just don't want to take any lukewarm or cold showers," I warned him.

He smirked at me and said, "I've been taking quite a few cold showers lately. But hopefully, that's coming to an end." With that, he stepped towards me and took my breath away in a passionate kiss.

When he ended the kiss, he said, "A week ago, I decided that I wanted to fuck you right here in our bed. I knew this was where we needed our first fuck after… everything. So I only have one question for you, Princess. How do you want it? Vanilla or kink?"

I stared at him, wide-eyed and horny as hell. My God, it was hot in here. "Can we have… vanilla with sprinkles? Maybe some… chocolate syrup? And a cherry on top?" I panted.

He chuckled as he began to rub my nipples. "That's what I was hoping you'd say," he said into my neck before he kissed it, and then moved lower to suck my nipple through my clothes.

Then, slowly, he began to remove my clothes. He began by kneeling in front of me and taking off my shoes and socks, one by one. Then, he stood up, kissed my lips tenderly, and very deliberately unbuttoned my blouse and slipped it off my shoulders. Next, he unzipped my pants and pushed them down, taking my panties with them. Last, he unhooked my bra and latched onto my breast. Then, in a very un-Dom-like voice, he said, "Sit down, Princess. I'm going to give you a show."

I watched him excitedly as he did exactly as he promised. He locked eyes with me as he removed his tie and unbuttoned his shirt. He said, "When you were ogling me earlier, you told me I was wearing too many clothes. I've been counting down the minutes to this moment since then." He slipped his shirt off and quickly removed his pants and briefs. Now, he stood naked before me. "So, let me ask you again, Princess. Do you like what you see?"

I nodded, unable to speak. All I could do was drink him in. Christian Grey was one hell of a sexy man. And he was mine. All mine.

"Lie down, Princess, and put your hands above your head." I obeyed him without question.

He took his tie in his hand as he straddled me. "Do you like our new bed, Anastasia?" he asked me. I nodded again, unable to speak.

"You should speak when I ask you a question, Princess," he reminded me.

Only then was I able to find my voice, but just barely. "I love it," I answered.

"I chose this headboard with you in mind. It's perfect for tying you up." That said, he used his tie to bind my hands to the headboard.

Before proceeding, he looked me in the eyes, and I could see the concern in his. "Are you OK with this, Princess?" he asked.

"More than OK," I answered.

"What are your safe words?" he asked.

"Red means stop. Yellow means slow down. Green means go. Right now, I'm green. Very green."

He smiled at me tenderly, and then kissed me even more tenderly. We made out for a few minutes before he began to move down my body, first teasing my breasts with his tongue and fingers, as he used his other hand to rub my pussy. He moaned his approval when he felt how wet I was.

"Christian, please!" I cried.

"I know, Princess. But not yet." Then he moved lower, kissing my stomach. I think he must have kissed every scar before he finally moved lower and made it to the promised land. When he finally licked up my slit, I almost came undone.

"Don't come yet, Anastasia. Hold it back," he commanded. It wasn't exactly his Dom voice, but it was spoken with authority, and I absolutely wanted to obey him.

Christian began to alternately lick and suck my clit as he tweaked and rubbed my nipples, bringing me very near the precipice in no time at all. "I can't hold back!" I warned him.

He stopped licking me only to move up my body again. He made me shiver as he whispered in my ear, "You are so fucking delicious. I'll never get enough of your taste."

"Fuck me, Christian!" I begged.

"Your wish is my command," he responded. Then, he positioned himself at my entrance. As he entered me, he kissed my lips passionately but tenderly. Then, once he was fully inside me, he looked in my eyes again. "Are you OK with this, Princess?" he asked.

"God, yes! Green! Fuck me, Christian. I need you to move."

He responded by kissing me again and doing as I asked. He pumped me much more slowly than I remembered him ever fucking, but it felt amazing. He was following the doctor's orders, but he was also meeting my needs perfectly.

"I love you, Christian!" I panted when he released my lips.

He responded by placing my feet on his shoulders so he could go deeper. "I love you too, baby. Now, keep looking in my eyes as you come with me!"

The bond that I felt with him at that moment was beyond anything that I can even find the words to describe. This was so much more than a physical connection; it was deeply spiritual. We had had this connection from the very beginning, but I had not realized or appreciated it as I did now, after spending weeks longing for it. I knew when Christian and I flew off the mountain together that we were going to be OK, because we had this connection, and it felt renewed now. I was Christian's and nothing that bastard Hyde had done to me could change that. I was so in love with Christian Grey, and there was no doubt in my mind that he was just as in love with me. As we locked lips as our orgasm winded down, I felt more peace than I could have ever imagined feeling so soon after my trauma. Christian Grey was my happily ever after, and nothing could change that.

A few hours later, we repeated our lovemaking, this time on my airplane. I'd been wanting to christen this bedroom since we'd been together, and we finally got our chance. This time, Christian made me come three times, and I finally felt sated. At least for the time being. I slept so well on that plane ride, and I suspect that Christian did as well, in spite of his nerves over meeting his grandmother.

Tuesday morning found us at the state women's prison just outside of Detroit. Christian held my hand and rubbed it absently as we waiting for Elisabeth Carter to be brought to the room where we'd been shown. He hadn't spoken since we'd deplaned, and I was concerned. I knew he was thinking through all the questions he wanted to ask his grandmother. We weren't allowed to touch her or to give her anything, which in many ways alleviated some of Christian's fears. He wouldn't have known whether to hug her, and the rule took away his need to make that choice.

I wasn't sure what I expected her to look like, but I was surprised nonetheless. I guess I'd been concerned that prison life would have worn her down, and it probably had, but she looked younger than I expected her to. She didn't look 60, but I knew from what Christian had told me that she had to be in her mid-60s. Her hair was not completely gray yet, although it did have streaks of gray. She was beautiful, just as she had been almost 30 years earlier in the photo that Christian showed me.

Christian didn't speak as Elizabeth entered the room and sat down at the table across from him. She smiled at him sadly and spoke first. "Christian. I'm so glad you came."

"Grandma," he responded, not much above a whisper. "I'm glad to meet you."

"I don't deserve to be called that," she told him sadly. "I've been waiting 25 years to say this to you. I'm sorry, Christian. So fucking sorry." She had tears in her eyes as she stared into his.

"No, don't be," Christian told her. "It's OK, Grandma."

Tears streamed down her face as she said, "You don't understand, sweetheart. I'm sorry… I shouldn't call you that. You don't understand."

"I don't mind if you call me sweetheart," Christian replied. "I like it, actually. My mom, Grace, called me that a lot when I was growing up."

Elizabeth shook her head. "You don't understand. You should hate me. I am the reason for all of your suffering. If I hadn't been so fucking weak, you would still have your mother, and you wouldn't have ever been abused the way you were."

"You don't know that," Christian responded firmly. "What happened to me wasn't your fault."

"Yes, it was," she insisted. "I drove Ella away. I was her mother. I was supposed to be the one to help her. But I couldn't even fucking help myself. I watched both of my babies die because I was too weak to do shit to help them. Christian… as happy as I am to see you, and to find out what you've made of yourself…. I don't deserve to be in your life now. I'm just a stupid old woman who failed to save her family."

"Well, that's bullshit, and it's unacceptable," Christian told her. Was that his Dom voice? What the hell was he doing? "Now, stop talking shit about yourself and accept the fact that you have a grandson now. I want you to meet this beautiful woman next to me, my fiancée, Anastasia Steele." Christian put his hand in mine and looked in my direction.

"I'm very happy to meet you," I told her.

"I'm happy to see that you're happy," she told Christian. "It is good to meet you, Anastasia. I know who you are because I've kept up with Christian's life all these years, first through Grace, and then when he became famous, through the Internet. When I first… came here, we didn't have the Internet. Now, I spend an hour or so almost every day looking at it. I agree with Christian, you are beautiful. Strong, too. I'm glad to see how well you've recovered from what happened to you. Something like that… it can destroy a woman. It did destroy my Evie. But not you. I can see that. You're an overcomer."

"Thank you," I answered simply. I wasn't sure how much she knew, beyond the fact that I'd been attacked and raped.

Christian spoke next, before Elizabeth had a chance to say anything else. "You look really well, Grandma. I wasn't sure… I didn't know after all these years in prison if you'd still look like your picture. You look a lot like my mom. I had a picture of her in my room growing up, so I never forgot what she looked like."

"Yes, I gave Grace that picture," Elizabeth said.

Christian nodded. "Yeah, I know. She gave me the rest of them just last month. I didn't know about you until then. Or about… Aunt Evelyn. Or about… my birth dad. I learned a lot by reading your letters."

"Yes, I know," she replied. "Grace wrote me. She told me. And I got your letter too, but you were too kind. I knew you were coming, but I didn't expect it this soon."

"I'm a powerful man, Grandma." Christian said simply.

Elizabeth nodded. "So, you read my letters, so you know all about your grandfather, and Evie and your mom. And Tom. Your dad."

"I know what you wrote about them," Christian affirmed. "But there's still a lot that I don't understand. I think… it's probably difficult for you to talk about. It can wait until later."

"I'll tell you anything you want to know," she assured him. "I've had many years to think over everything that happened. Yes, it's difficult, but… you deserve to know, Christian."

"What happened to Evelyn?" he asked her.

"Something very similar to what happened to your Anastasia here," she replied sadly as she motioned towards me. "One of Tom's friends attacked her. She was a virgin, and he almost killed her. She never got over it. She didn't overdose accidently like Ella probably did. With Evie, it was suicide, without a doubt. I didn't get her the help she needed. Tom blamed himself, which is probably why he started acting up. He'd always been a good boy until Evie died. She was one of his best friends. Ella was his love, but Evie was his best friend besides her. All four of them were like peas in a pod."

"Four?" Christian asked. "Who was the fourth one?"

"Did I not write about Rachel?" she responded by asking.

"Rachel?" Christian repeated. "I remember you referencing a Rachel in some of your letters, but I didn't know who you were referring to."

"Tom's sister. She was only a year younger than him, so they were nearly as much like twins as my girls were."

"So… you're saying that my birth father had a sister?" Christian confirmed. "Do you know if she's still alive?"

"I don't know why she wouldn't be," she answered. "I haven't heard from any of them since I've been in here. Emma blamed me for what happened to Tom and Ella, and rightfully so. I haven't heard from her in years."

"Who is Emma?" Christian asked.

"She was my best friend. And Tom and Rachel's mother. Which would make her your other grandmother."

"Emma… Norwood?" Christian asked. "I tried to find information about my birth dad after I learned his name, but my people couldn't find anything but dead ends."

"No, Emma's first husband died. Kevin Norwood. He would have been your grandfather. The kids were just little when he died. He had cancer. Emma remarried, so her last name was Timms. Emma Timms. Rachel was a Norwood, but she probably got married so she might have changed her name." 

"And they lived in Flint?" Christian asked.

"They did 25 years ago," she replied. "Who knows what happened since then? Your guess is as good as mine."

Christian nodded, and then he changed the subject. "What do you know about William Lake?"

Elizabeth sucked in a breath and visibly cringed. "He's dead. That's all that matters."

"Why'd you do it?" Christian asked.

She sighed before she replied, "He killed my baby. I know he didn't murder Ella, but he was single-handedly responsible for her death. And he hurt you badly. I knew…" She stopped and struggled to control her emotions before she continued, "Grace told me about your nightmares. You didn't speak, but the only time Grace heard your voice was when you were having a nightmare. I'd seen the scars on your body. I knew what that son of a bitch had done to you. But I couldn't prove a damn thing. I knew there was no way the police would ever do shit. So I did what I had to do. I'm not sorry. If they need me to say I'm sorry or some shit before they let me out of this place, then I'll be here for the rest of my life. I would do it again."

"Have you ever come up for parole before?" Christian asked her.

"Not until now," she answered. "I got a life sentence. Most people think that criminals like me only serve five or ten years when we get life, but it's not true. I knew I'd have to serve about 90% of my sentence. That's what it's been, pretty much."

"What do you want to do when they release you?" Christian asked.

"Honestly, I don't really care if they release me. I lost everything that mattered to me long ago."

"You still have me," Christian told her.

She stared at him silently before shaking her head and saying, "As much as I would love that… I've done too much to fail you. I don't deserve you."

"Well, fuck that," Christian responded. "I just found out less than a month ago that I have a grandmother. And now, you're telling me that I might also have another grandmother, and even an aunt. Not only that, but you killed the son of a bitch who tormented me, not only when I was a toddler but for the rest of my life in my nightmares. But now that I know what you did, I feel free from him. You're my hero, Grandma. So, don't tell me what you think you deserve. As far as I can see it, you've served your time. You've been punished enough. I want you in my life. Shouldn't that be my choice?"

She wiped tears from her eyes as she nodded and replied, "Yes. Yes, that should be your choice."


	49. Ch 49: The Rest of the Family (CPOV)

**Chapter 49: The Rest of the Family (Christian's POV)**

Meeting my grandmother was surreal. She looked so fucking much like my birth mom, and she answered so many questions that I'd had my entire life and others that I hadn't even known to ask. Apparently, I had more family that I hadn't even known about.

Once I was able to convince her that I want her in my life, she agreed to consider moving to Seattle once she was released and then permitted to leave the state. I determined to pull whatever strings I could to get her released as soon as possible, and get her cleared to legally leave the state of Michigan. Surely, they could transfer her, and she could report to a parole officer, or whatever it was they expected her to do, in Washington. I knew it would take several months to accomplish all this, even with my connections, but that was OK. We'd waited my entire lifetime to know one another; we could wait a few more months. In the meantime, we would stay in touch through letters, just as she had with Mom and Dad all these years.

When we left the prison after talking for about three hours with Grandma Liz, as she finally admitted that she would love for us to call her, I called Welch immediately and gave him the names of my other grandmother, Emma Timms, and my aunt, Rachel Norwood. I told him that she was probably married by now so she might go by another name, but if he traced her back to my birth father and their mother, he should be able to find out what happened to her. I made sure he understood that this was top priority and I needed the results as soon as possible so I could visit them if they still existed and were still in Michigan. I suspected that the reason he hadn't found anything before was because he had not realized how high it was on my priority list, and I'd also had him looking for Joseph Horowitz. Now that the FBI was on his tail and had leads that he was in Thailand, it was less a priority for Welch. Finding the rest of my family needed to come first.

Ana was still recovering and not at 100%, and I knew she needed to rest even if she wouldn't admit it, so we went back to our hotel after leaving the prison. While she napped, I called Dad and filled him in on my visit with Grandma Liz. Since he was close friends with the governor of Michigan, I thought he might be able to call in more favors to get her released early. Apparently, Dad and the governor had been in a study group together at Harvard Law School, and they'd saved each other's necks more than once by sharing their course outlines and preparing for finals together. Since they'd graduated more than three decades ago, they had remained good friends. Now, hopefully, that was going to work to my advantage, just as it had in getting in to see Grandma Liz so quickly.

Dad also filled me in on Isaac's progress. He'd been very worried while in Fiji because they'd had to leave Isaac behind while his mother was in a vegetative state. Brenda did finally pass away, but not until the Tuesday after we returned from Fiji. While Mom and Dad were away, they'd enlisted John Flynn and his wife to stay at Grey Manor and support Isaac around the clock. It wasn't as ideal as Mom and Dad being there themselves, but they'd felt they needed to be there for Elliot's wedding. Now that Brenda was dead, and we had already had her funeral, Isaac was beginning to find a new normal as he still grieved his mother's death. Amazingly, he still hadn't gotten behind with his school work. I'd already realized when I took a look at his academic record that he was a genius. With the proper support, he could achieve more than I ever dreamed of. I wanted to find out what he truly wanted to do with his life, but to do that, I needed to talk with him more, man to man. I promised Dad that I'd spend some time with Isaac when I got back home.

When Ana awakened from her nap, we Skyped with Gail and Christina. Christina was beginning to talk more, and she got more adorable as each day passed. She'd been calling me Daddy since not long after we met, but now she was using more words, even some short phrases and sentences. She could already say "I love you," and we said it often. Now she was saying, "Miss you, Daddy," and "You the best, Na-na," which is what she called Ana. She sang her ABCs for us, and giggled sweetly when we applauded her. Her giggle was a lot like Ana's. If ever I felt stressed, all I needed was to hear one of my girls giggle, and I would immediately feel calm. We ended the call sooner than I'd wanted to because Christina started getting fussy. She was teething, so she was cranky, and Gail added that she was also hungry. My baby needed to eat, so we let them go. She blew us kisses before we ended the call, which made me happy.

After ending our talk with Christina, we spent some time online picking out furniture for our new house. Ana convinced me that we could still keep some of our old furniture and have it moved from Escala. I was in favor of getting rid of everything and buying all new stuff, but apparently she had a few sentimental pieces that she wanted to keep. She also admonished me for being wasteful, reminding me that Christina's furniture was practically brand-new. According to Ana, just because we were billionaires, that was not a good reason to be wasteful. Whatever. As long as she was happy, and as long as we didn't have crappy looking furniture, I didn't really care.

Talking about our being billionaires was the perfect lead in for Ana to get me to talk with her more about the Christian and Anastasia Grey Foundation. My girl was never one to mince her words, and this time was no exception. She wanted us to give our fortune away, in much the same way that Bill and Melinda Gates had pledged to give theirs away. The difference was that Ana wanted us to devote ourselves to eradicating all forms of abuse, whereas the Gates Foundation was focused on ending global poverty. She said that she wanted us to lead a very public campaign against all forms of abuse, which raised all kinds of red flags for me.

This concept of billionaires pledging to give away their wealth wasn't new to me. I was very familiar with "the Giving Pledge," started by Warren Buffet and Bill Gates, and I liked the idea in general. But I wasn't sure I liked the direction that Ana seemed to be thinking. I began to count off for Ana on my fingers each reason that I questioned whether it was a good idea.

"First of all," I told her, "I want to make sure that Christina and our future children are well provided for. Second of all, I'm not sure how you and I are going to be received by the world on the issue of abuse. Third of all..."

Ana interrupted me. "First of all, I agree with you that we should make sure that we have plenty left for our children, but Christian... let's be real. We're mega wealthy. Our children don't even need half of our wealth to be set for life. And besides, I don't want them to turn out like the Kardashians. Can you imagine our children in a reality tv show talking about how they wasted their wealth?" Ana shuttered and waited for me to respond.

"No, I agree with you that I want to teach our kids to have a strong work ethic. I want them to be responsible people who work to make the world a better place." I paused before I added, "I just... don't want them to ever want for anything."

"I agree. As soon as we get back to Seattle, let's set up a trust fund for Christina. How much do you want to make it?"

"Umm... one billion?" I suggested.

"That's a lot. Does she need even half that?" Ana questioned.

"OK, 500 million," I agreed. "That's still more money than most people will ever see."

"Christian, one million is more than most people will ever see. We're so spoiled in our wealth."

"Ana, there's no way in hell I'm only going to leave one million dollars to my child. What kind of father would that make me?"

Ana smirked at me. "A damn good one. And a rich one. But I agree, we can do better. But I think more than 100 million per child is excessive. That's still a whole hell of a lot of money."

I considered her suggestion for a moment. Was 100 million enough? Yes, it truly was a whole hell of a lot of money. "OK, agreed. 100 million per child. And Christina's gets started as soon as we get back. We'll start the ones for our other kids when they're born."

"Good," Ana answered, and moved on the the next topic. "Second of all, who better to be the face of abuse than us? We were both abused. Me more recently, but you much more extensively."

I objected, "Ana, have you so quickly forgotten that the entire fucking country thinks I'm an abuser? I'm the perpetrator, not a victim. It was only a few weeks ago that that fucking video was released. People still have that image of me beating the hell out of Leila in their minds. And now, all of a sudden, they're expected to believe that I'm some kind of mega-wealthy do-gooder, trying to stop the very thing I'm guilty of? What kind of fucking hypocrite does that make me?"

"Since when do you let what people think stop you from doing what you want to do? And besides, you're exaggerating. The entire fucking country doesn't think that."

I ignored her words and continued, "And what about you? What happened to you was beyond brutal, and it was barely a month ago. What are you suggesting, Ana? Are you going to talk about it publicly? Baby, you can barely talk about it with me. And that's OK, that's not my issue, because you need more time before you're ready to talk about it. I'm just trying to understand... what are you thinking here? I know you want us to get behind the human trafficking issue, but what you're suggesting now is much bigger than that, and... I'm not sure you realize the fall-out that's in store if you do what you're considering."

"What exactly are you referring to?" Ana asked me, but I could see from her expression that she already knew exactly what I was referring to. She just wanted me to be the one to say it.

"Ana..." I paused and sighed before I continued, "There was a reason why that shit-faced reporter asked you if you fucking enjoyed being brutally raped. He put words to a question that people were asking. He wasn't the only one who made the connection between your being engaged to me and admitting that you enjoyed submitted to me in a nationally televised interview... and you being brutally beaten and raped by that monster. Some people don't see a difference."

"Then we make them see a difference," Ana insisted.

"Why, Ana? Why put yourself through that?" I asked her.

"Because people are hurting, and they aren't famous like me so they are powerless. I'm not powerless, and I can do something about it. Monsters are getting away with all kinds of shit. It needs to end, and we have the power to do something about it." I could see by the look in her eye that she wasn't going to back down.

"How?" I asked her. "If you think we're the ones to make people see a difference, how do you propose we do that?"

She hesitated before she answered, "You... aren't going to like my answer."

"Baby, I'm not sure I like anything about this conversation, but give it to me," I responded.

She still hesitated before she blurted it out. "I think we should commission Kate to write our biography. I think we should tell the world about the abuse that we've experienced and how we've dealt with it... or, in my case, how we're... in the process of dealing with it. If Kate writes it, then it will be easier to tell her about... all the shit we've been through. We wouldn't have to talk about it anywhere else. And if we tell all, then it will give others the courage to tell their stories too. We could use it to launch our foundation. Wait until she's finished writing it before we announce our plans. And in the meantime, we can set it up. Hire the staff we need to run it. Research the organizations that already exist that do the things we want to get behind. Help Raina and Ken start their non-profit. I'm thinking globally, and the schools I want to open in East Africa are part of it. If girls are educated, they're less likely to be victims of abuse. They're less likely to agree to female circumcision. They're more likely to..."

"Wait, what?" I interrupted her. "What the hell is female circumcision?"

"Female genital mutilation," she answered. "It's still practiced in some of the areas that I want to open my schools. The girl's entire external genitalia are removed so that she can't enjoy sexual intercourse. They believe it prevents her from cheating. But it's acceptable in a lot of these cultures for the men to be promiscuous. Just not the women."

"Good God," I muttered.

"So, what do you think?" Ana asked. "About our biography, not about female circumcision."

"You already know what I think," I answered her. "I don't want to talk about that shit. Until I met you, the only person I'd ever told was my therapist. And I don't want you to push yourself to talk about your attack."

"Christian, if we're going to have any credibility at all as champions of victims of abuse, we're going to have to tell our stories," Ana insisted.

I sighed. "I don't like it. No, Ana. I can't stop you from pushing yourself to do something you have no business doing, no matter how much I'd like to. If you were my submissive, we wouldn't even be having this conversation. But I don't want you to do it, I'll just leave it at that. And I don't want to talk about my fucking abuse. Thankfully, now I know the bastard is dead, but it's still not something I want to think about. And Elena... she's dead too. But I didn't even consider what she did to me abuse until recently. And if I talk about her, I also have to talk about my submissives. And Ana... I believe what I did to them was abuse. They may not see it that way, and they were all willing, but it doesn't change how I see it. I was punishing Ella, and now that I know the truth about Ella... do I really want to admit that to the world? Grandma Liz will read it if we publish that shit in a book. Do I want her to know why I did what I did?"

Ana was the one to sigh now. "I understand your reservations. What I'm suggesting won't be easy. But it could help people to know... why you did it, and how you dealt with your abuse. You've healed, Christian. You aren't the man you were before."

"Ana... I think I liked talking about how much money we're going to leave our kids more than I like this conversation. I've heard you, but... we need to table this for now. I'm... just not ready to tell all, and I don't think you are either."

"OK," Ana agreed. I think she understood that we needed more time to consider all that she'd proposed.

The topic of trust funds for our future children made me anxious to get started making those children. Part of me longed to see my child growing in Ana's belly. There was never a moment that I didn't want Ana, but I needed to keep reminding myself to keep it gentle with her. She still had a long way to go in her recovery, and I knew it would be months before she was ready to think about having a baby. I wasn't going to dare to bring it up yet. We'd already agreed to wait until after our wedding anyway, so there wasn't anything to discuss yet. I just knew I wanted more children with her. I hadn't been joking when I told her I wanted a whole house full. Hell, we could build a bigger house if we outgrew ours.

We made love before we fell asleep that night, and we would have again when we woke up the next morning, but before we had a chance, Ana jumped out of bed and raced to the bathroom. Shit! She was sick again. I followed her and held her hair away from her face as she vomited violently into the toilet.

"How long has this been going on?" I asked her when her heaving had stopped.

"Just... yesterday. This is only the second time," she answered.

"Should we go to the ER?" I asked her.

"No, I'm not that sick. Just give me a minute. I think it will pass."

I got a wet washcloth and wiped her face with it. Meanwhile I was worried as fuck. What if she were seriously ill? How could I convince her to go to the hospital? But I understood why she didn't want to. If I were sick, I wouldn't want to go to a strange ER in an unfamiliar city either.

I didn't mention to Ana the other thing that was on my mind. Actually, it was impossible anyway. Ana couldn't possibly be pregnant. She'd been tested after her attack, and the results were negative. We hadn't fucked since then until yesterday. Besides, she had an UID, which had a very high success rate of preventing pregnancy. So whatever this was, it wasn't morning sickness. As much as I longed for her to have my child, I was thankful for that, because I knew my girl wasn't ready to be pregnant, physically or emotionally.

Ana rested in bed while I caught up on emails with Ismintis staff and with Ros. I filled Ana in on the deals going on at both places, and she added her two cents. I'd made it a point to do this more often over the past week, and I think Ana appreciated it. I loved the fact that we were already working as partners in running both companies. Working with her as my co-CEO of Ismintis-Grey was going to be fucking awesome.

It was almost 24 hours before I heard back from Welch with a full report of Emma Timms and Rachel Norwood Kramer, and by that time, Ana said she felt better. She certainly looked better. I read the report with her, so we learned at the same time that my paternal grandmother and aunt were both still alive and living in Flint. Within a couple of hours of getting this information, we were back in Ana's plane... I liked hers better than any of mine, so I didn't object when she requested that we take it... and headed to Flint, which was only about half an hour away by air.

On the way, Ana and I discussed what we'd learned in the report. Emma had been a widow for twenty-two years. After her second husband, Jacob Timms, had died, she'd never remarried. She was a retired school teacher. Rachel had been divorced for ten years, and she worked as a guidance counselor in a local high school. Her ex-husband, Peter Kramer was a lawyer. He was remarried and living in Chicago. They had two children together, Derrick and Kelly. Derrick was a third-year business major at Harvard, and Kelly was a senior in high school. Holy hell, I had cousins too!

We found the address that Welch had sent fairly easily. I felt nervous as Ana and I stood on the porch and knocked on the door. What if they didn't welcome the fact that they had a long-lost relative?

A girl with long curly hair about the same color as mine opened the door. When she saw me, her jaw dropped open. When she saw Ana, she screamed. What the hell was that about?

"You must be Kelly Kramer, right?" I asked her.

She screamed again before she yelled, "Mom! Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele are at our door, and he knows my fucking name!"

"Kelly!" I head a woman's admonishing voice. "Watch your language!"

"Sorry, Mom! But shit! Am I awake? Am I dreaming this?"

The woman came into view, and I knew she had to be my Aunt Rachel. I smiled politely and said, "Hi! Your daughter is correct. We are indeed Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele. Are you Rachel Norwood Kramer?"

Aunt Rachel's eyes just about popped out of her head. "Holy shit!" she mumbled before she caught herself and replied. "Yes, I'm Rachel Norwood. I dropped the Kramer about a decade ago. How do you know who I am?"

"Mom! Derrick wasn't kidding. He's totally Uncle Tom's doppleganger."

"Yes, I realize that," Rachel agreed. "It was what caught me by surprise. You look just like my brother who died nearly 30 years ago. Well, that, and the fact that the two of you are here. I've seen both of your pictures in Forbes. And Derrick talks about you almost constantly. Both of you. Derrick's my son. He's a business major. But I can't imagine why two of the most powerful business leaders in the nation would be here knocking on our door."

"I can explain everything," I assured her. "Is it OK for us to come in?"

"Oh my God, of course, yes. Where are my manners. I'm just so... taken by surprise. Come in, please," Aunt Rachel motioned us inside. "Can I get either of you something to drink?"

"Can I have some water?" Ana asked politely.

"I'll get it," Kelly sang as she practically ran into the kitchen. She came back with a glass of water for each of us just as we had seated ourselves on a comfortable sofa in the living room.

"So, how can I help you?" Aunt Rachel asked.

"Well..." I paused, collecting my thoughts, trying to decide the best way to announce this news. No matter how I put it, it was going to come as a shock to them. "There's not an easy way to tell you this. There is a reason why I look like Thomas Norwood. He was my birth father."

Aunt Rachel's eyes nearly popped out of her head again. "Tom...? Why do you think...? Are you..." She stopped, shook her head, and finally asked one coherent question. "Can you explain why you think so?"

I replied, "My birth mother was Ella Carter. Her boyfriend was Thomas Norwood. He died in a car accident just a couple of months after I was conceived. Ella moved to Detroit before I was born, and she died about four years later."

Rachel now had tears running down her face. "Ella was pregnant. I knew that, but I thought she lost the baby in the accident. How...? I'm amazed that you... you survived. Wow! Ella almost died. I was certain that she'd lost the baby."

"So, none of you... knew about me?" I asked.

"We had no idea. If Mom had known, she would have told me," Rachel replied.

Her mom... my grandmother... Emma Timms. This was a good inroad to ask about her but I felt nervous again. "Is your mom...? Does she...? My report says that she lives here too. Is that correct?"

"Yes," Rachel answered as she dried her tears and composed herself. "Mom has lived with us for almost five years. She started... having mental issues, and she needed some support. She's on medication and doing fine now. She attends an adult daycare, and she'll be back soon. She's going to be surprised to find out she has another grandson."

"Are you saying...? Holy shit! Christian Grey is my cousin?" Kelly asked excitedly.

"Kelly, language," Rachel admonished.

"Sorry, Mom!" Kelly replied. She looked at me and asked, "Can I take a selfie with you? Derrick doesn't believe me that you're here. I texted him, and he said I was lying. He's gonna shit a brick when he finds out we're cousins."

"Umm... sure," I replied uncertainly.

"Can you be in it too, Anastasia? Is it OK for me to call you Anastasia?" Kelly asked enthusiastically.

"Ana, and yes, if you want me in your picture, that's OK," Ana replied.

Before I knew what was happening, Kelly had seated herself between me and Ana, and she had her arm around me. Yes, she was my relative, but I'd never met the girl before today, and her touching me... I was not OK with that.

Rachel came to my rescue. "Kelly, you're smothering them."

"Oh, sorry!" Kelly apologized. She quickly got up and moved away, so I could breathe again. Ana scooted closer to me and rubbed my hand soothingly. My heart rate slowed down, and I relaxed.

"So... Ella moved to Detroit and gave birth to you," Aunt Rachel said thoughtfully. When I nodded, she explained, "I... I tried to find out what happened to her. I knew she disappeared after Tom..." She paused, and wiped her eyes again.

"It's OK, you don't have to talk about it," I told her.

"You have to understand. Tom and I were close. Very close. I was just a year younger, almost to the day, and we were more like twins growing up. I could relate to Ella and Evie, sharing a brain and all. Those two constantly finished each other's sentences. When Evie died, we were all lost without her, and Tom... the guilt just ate him up. Ella... she couldn't function without Evie. It was like part of her brain, and part of her heart... were just gone."

"So... you didn't know she went to Detroit?" I asked Rachel.

"I tried to find out where she went, but Liz wasn't talking. To be fair, Liz was grieving too. But at the time, I didn't see it that way, and she knew it. She knew I blamed her for what happened to Evie. Because she didn't get her the help she needed. Evie's the reason I became a guidance counselor. If someone had been there to help her through her ordeal, she would have... maybe... recovered from it."

I asked her, "Did you know about what happened... to her? Liz I mean?"

"To be honest, I was going through my own... issues. I'd lost the three people who meant everything to me. They'd been my closest friends. I was still a kid myself, and I didn't deal well with that. I'd heard that Liz had gone to prison for killing somebody, and I remember being shocked at the time, but I don't remember much more than that."

I nodded, and debated telling her what happened. I decided that she would find out eventually, so why not just tell her now. "The man she killed was a horrible man who abused my birth mom... and me. He's the reason Ella died. He got her hooked on drugs and he forced her to..." Damn, this was hard to say to someone who'd known her and loved her back then. "He forced her into prostitution."

"What!?" Rachel cried. "No... that's not right. Not Ella. Tom was her only... They lost their virginity to each other. Ella couldn't have been... No!"

"I was four years old when she died," I responded. "I remember... Anyway, it's not important to dwell on that. She died of an overdose when I was four. After that, I ended up in foster care, and then was adopted by Carrick and Grace Grey. I guess I was Christian Carter before I became Christian Grey."

Rachel nodded thoughtfully. She examined my face, no doubt thinking of her brother. Then she blurted out a question that I wasn't ready for. "So, now that I've learned that you're my nephew, I need to know the truth about all those rumors and that video that was recently released of you beating a woman... who turned out to be the mother of your child if I'm not mistaken. What is the true story there, and how many other woman did you do that to?"

Ana chimed in then, coming to my defense. "Christian is not abusive. What he did with all of his former...umm... girlfriends... was consensual."

Rachel smiled politely at Ana and said, "I respect you a lot, Anastasia."

"Ana," Ana corrected her.

"Ana," Rachel repeated. "If you, one of the most powerful women in the country, are still standing behind him, especially after what happened to you recently, that says a lot. But, with all due respect, I need to hear it from... my nephew. This is all very surreal. My nephew. So, what's the story, Christian?"

I ran my hand through my hair and tried to find a good way to answer her questions, but I couldn't. No matter how I put it, it was going to sound terrible. Besides, there was so much to my story, and I didn't want to tell her everything right now. I especially never wanted to tell her that I was abusing Ella for not protecting me.

"I... practiced an alternative lifestyle. It's called BDSM. I'm a Dominant, and the women were submissives. Not my girlfriends, but submissives that I contracted with."

Rachel said, "I remember you saying something about that in the interview that you did with Katheryn Kavanagh."

"That's right," I affirmed. "You saw Leila in that interview. And you are correct that she was the mother of my child, Christina. Ana is in the process of adopting her, and we expect it to be completed by Christmas. Leila had breast cancer, and she died... the same day that Ana was attacked. I didn't know about Christina until about a week or so before that interview."

"How many other women did you do that to?" Rachel repeated her question from earlier.

"Umm... I contracted with fifteen submissives, not counting Ana," I answered uncomfortably. Damn, this was hard. I hoped she was satisfied with that answer, because I had no idea how many others there had been that I'd played with at parties.

Kelly spoke up then, and I'd almost forgotten that she was sitting there listening. Damn it, wasn't she too young to be exposed to this shit? "I saw a Youtube video of one of them. Amaya something-or-other. She said you were the best Dom she'd ever had and that you were really generous. Didn't you pay for her law degree or something?"

I nodded, still feeling very uncomfortable. "I did. It was nothing."

Kelly's phone rang then, and she answered it. It was a face-time call from her brother, Derrick. Hopefully, he had just saved me from answering any more embarrassing questions.

"Believe me now?" Kelly asked Derrick.

"What were you doing to him, Kelly? Did you fart on him?" Derrick asked. "Why was he making that awful face? Do you have B.O.?"

"He can hear you," Kelly warned him. "They both can. And no, for your information, I just showered an hour ago."

"Holy shit, they're still there?" Derrick asked, his voice getting higher pitched.

Kelly handed me her phone and told me, "Say hello to your other cousin, Derrick Kramer."

"Hi, Derrick," I said as I looked at the phone. Derrick resembled me a little, but his hair was darker.

"Oh, my God, hello, Christian Grey! You're my hero. Oh, shit, I sound like a moron. But seriously, I've read everything ever written about you."

"If you've read everything, and I'm still you're hero, that's saying a lot," I told him.

Anastasia moved so that she was also in view of the camera, and she told Derrick, "I can relate. I'd read everything about him before we met too. I followed his business model to a T."

"Anastasia Steele, you're my hero too. I love you. I mean, not like that. I don't know you. I just... I think you're awesome. Shit, I sound like an idiot."

"Don't worry about it, Derrick," I told him. "So, did you hear what Kelly called me when she handed me the phone? Your cousin?"

"Yeah, but Kelly's an idiot, so I wasn't sure..." Derrick answered.

"It's true though. Your Uncle Thomas Norwood was my birth father. I only learned about that recently, and I only learned about your existence this morning."

"This morning?" Rachel asked. "How did you get here so quickly?"

"I was in Detroit visiting my grandmother. My other grandmother, I mean. Elizabeth Carter. She's in the women's prison just outside of Detroit."

"Wait, what?" Derrick asked. "Why's your grandmother in prison?"

"For killing the man that is responsible for his mother's death," Kelly answered for me.

"It's a long story," I told him. "But I'd like to... get to know you, Derrick. I'd like to get to know all of you."

"I'd like that," Derrick responded.

"What are you guys planning to do for Christmas?" I asked them. I knew from experience that Derrick would have a fairly lengthy break from classes at Harvard.

"Visiting you, I hope," Kelly answered.

"That's exactly what I was about to suggest," I told them.

"We're moving into a new house, and we have plenty of room for all of you," Ana added. I smiled at her gratefully. That was my supportive girl.

"I'm getting ready to spend a semester abroad... at Cambridge," Derrick answered. "But if Mom and Gran want to go to Seattle, then I'm all for it."

Rachel answered, "I doubt we'll be able to convince Gran to get on an airplane, but it's fine for you kids to go. Just come back and spend a few days with us before you leave for England."

Just then, the front door slammed. Either they had an intruder, or Emma Timms had arrived home. I knew it wasn't an intruder because we had four security guards just outside the door, so it had to be my grandmother.

"What's with the body guards outside?" she asked as she walked through the door. Yes, this woman was definitely my grandmother, and I must have taken after her side of the family. Her hair was grey, but her facial features were very similar to my own.

Before anyone could reply, she saw me and stopped in her tracks. She didn't react as I had expected her to, like Rachel had, with shock. Instead, she stood in front of me for a moment, blinking her eyes.

Derrick was the one to speak first. "Gran! Aren't you going to say hello?"

Emma blinked again, and then turned to Rachel. "Honey, I think we need to make me an appointment with Dr. Birmingham. I'm... I'm seeing things again."

Kelly said, "You aren't seeing things, Gran. They're really here."

Emma looked back at me again. She looked even more confused. She glanced at Anastasia, and then back at me. Finally she said, "I don't know who this lovely young woman is, and this young man cannot possibly be my Tommy. He died 28 years ago. I may be old, and I may be somewhat crazy, but I'm not senile."

"Gran, he's Christian Grey," Kelly told her. "And that's Anastasia Steele. Derrick studies them. Their work, I mean. They're both business people."

Emma still looked just as confused. "What are they doing here?" she asked.

Rachel said, "Mom, sit down. Christian has some news for you."

Emma heeded the words of her daughter, and as soon as she was seated, I spoke to her for the first time. "It's very nice to meet you. I'm Christian. I'm not your Tommy, as you called him, but there's a reason why I look like him. I'm his son, and your grandson. Ella Carter was my mother."

Now Emma's face showed the shock that I expected. "She didn't lose the baby?" she asked.

"No, I was that baby. She moved to Detroit before I was born and gave birth to me there."

"What happened to her?" Emma asked.

I sighed before I answered her, because there was no easy way to tell this story... again. "She died when I was four years old. I was adopted after that. It's how I became a Grey."

Emma stared at me for the longest time, taking it all in. Finally, she reached out her hand and said, "I'm happy to make your acquaintance. And what about this pretty girl at your side. Who would that be?"

I smiled and reached my arm around Anastasia. "This is my beautiful fiancee, Anastasia Steele."

"Please, call me Ana," she replied. "And I'm very happy to meet you."

"So am I, dear. So am I," Emma replied.


	50. Ch 50: Back from MI, Busy as Ever (APOV

**Chapter 50: Back Home from Michigan, Busy as Ever (Anastasia's POV)**

Even before I heard that evil voice I'd hoped against hope that I'd never hear again, I knew it was him. I could smell his stench. He had me again. I couldn't see anything, but I didn't feel anything covering my eyes; I was not physically able to open my eyes. He must have drugged me again. I also couldn't move my body, just as I had been unable to move before, when he'd brutalized me. I tried to scream, but no sound would escape my throat. I tried to fight, willing my body to obey my brain, but I was completely immobile.

When he spoke, I could hear the sneer in his voice, even if I couldn't see his face. "I told you I'd find you when you least expected it, Princess. You'll never be free from me. You think you're his, but you aren't. You'll always be mine."

"No!" I screamed in my head as I felt his cold clammy hands on me. My voice wouldn't work, so I couldn't scream out loud. Where the hell was I, and how had I gotten here? Where was Christian, and why wasn't he coming to help me?

And then, suddenly, I woke up. Holy shit! It was just a dream, another fucking nightmare. Since returning from our trip to Michigan, I'd had a few of these, but only in the mornings after Christian was already gone or in the afternoon when I took a nap. Christian had been getting up early and working overtime to make up for the few days we'd been gone last week. As long as he was holding me, he kept the nightmares at bay. He was right, we really were each other's dream catchers. Since all my nightmares had occurred when he was already gone to work, he didn't know about them, and I wanted to keep it that way. Whenever I saw the worry in his eyes, I felt depressed and frustrated that I was still dealing with this shit, more than a month later. Christian already worried about me too much, so I didn't want to give him more to concern him. Besides, I was a big girl. I had known even before they started that these fucking nightmares were likely to happen... Geeta had warned me that it was a common occurrence after the trauma I'd suffered. There wasn't anything anybody could do about it. I just had to keep going, keep recovering, and little by little, I'd get through it. Put one foot in front of the other, and just try to keep my brain focused on other things.

Oh God! I jumped out of bed and dashed to the bathroom, getting there just in time, before I vomited violently into the toilet. Gross! I was so sick of this shit! Unfortunately over the past few days, this had also become a common occurrence after one of these fucking nightmares. I'm sure it was the thought of that bastard that gave me an upset stomach. I knew I needed to talk to Geeta, so yesterday, I'd called and made an appointment with her for today. It was long overdue, and I knew I needed to ask her to resume our daily Skype sessions if she could, or at least to meet regularly.

The past week had been a whirlwind, so it wasn't exactly my fault that I hadn't been able to have any counseling sessions. We'd been very busy. After meeting Christian's paternal birth family on Thursday, exactly one week ago, we'd spent another day in Flint. On Friday morning, we'd visited the cemetery where all of Christian's deceased family members were buried. We started with his birth mother Ella, which was very emotional for both of us. Christian poured his heart out to Ella, asking for her forgiveness while granting her his own. Tears ran down my own face, and I was surprised to see tears falling from his own eyes as he admitted how he had punished her for neglecting and abandoning him, and he begged her to forgive him. Then he admitted his own guilt at not being able to protect her, and for punishing women who looked like her when he didn't know the whole story about her circumstances. Christian said some very powerful words of healing that day at Ella's grave, the most powerful being "I'm sorry" and "I forgive you."

Ella was buried next her twin sister Evelyn. They each had simple tombstones, with just their names and dates of their birth and death. Next to them was a double tombstone for their parents. Their father, James Carter, had been buried here years ago. Elizabeth Carter's name was also already on the stone, along with her birth date. Grandma Liz already had a place to be laid to rest when the time came. It made me wonder if she had expected to die in prison and had prepared this ahead of time, after she buried Ella. Christian didn't need as much time to pay his respects to his aunt Evelyn and his grandfather, since he hadn't known about them until so recently. He did take the time to lay the flowers we'd brought on their graves, and spend some time silently contemplating. I knew he was thinking about how different his life would have been if they had all lived longer.

When Christian was finished paying his respects to his maternal birth family, we walked a short distance and found the graves of his birth father and grandfather, Thomas and Nathaniel Norwood. As with Ella, Christian had some words to say to his birth father, words both asking for and granting forgiveness. He admitted to hating his birth father for abandoning him and Ella, and he cried again as he explained that he just hadn't known the truth. Christian then told Thomas that he hoped he was resting in peace, not blaming himself for Evelyn's death any longer, because it wasn't his fault, or for Ella's either. He said that he hoped that he and Ella were together, and that he would see them again someday.

We both needed some down time after such an emotional morning, so we rested in our hotel. Actually, I napped while Christian worked on his laptop. Later that evening, we had dinner with Emma Timms, who insisted that we call her Gram, as her other grandkids did, and Aunt Rachel and Kelly. Aunt Rachel insisted on cooking for us, and I have to admit, she's a wonderful cook. She made some kind of Greek dish that I couldn't get enough of; I even had seconds. It was one of the rare days that I didn't feel sick the entire day.

Saturday morning, we returned to Detroit and visited with Grandma Liz once last time before leaving Michigan. Like before, we didn't have any difficulty getting in to see her, probably thanks to Carrick's friendship with the governor. We had a nice long talk with Grandma Liz. Christian even told her about visiting the cemetery.

This time, Grandma Liz had more questions about us. She first wanted us to tell her more about her great granddaughter, Christina, whose picture she'd seen. She already knew the story of how Leila and Christina had come into our lives; we'd already shared all that with her. This time, she just wanted to know what kinds of things Christina liked, and what her personality was like. Then she wanted to know all about our wedding plans, and it made me sad that she wouldn't be able to be there. Even if Christian were able to expedite her release, we knew it wouldn't be that soon. She shrugged it off, claiming that she'd been in prison so long a few more weeks or months wouldn't make too much difference. Then, she turned the topic back to us, asking us if we were planning to have more kids. I didn't miss the excitement in her eyes when she asked.

"Yes, when Anastasia is ready," Christian answered her. "She's still recovering from everything, so we aren't even thinking about it until after our wedding."

"You know twins run in our family, right?" Grandma Liz asked with a teasing smile.

I'm sure my eyebrows must have shot up, because she sniggered at me. "Twins?" I asked dumbly. Did I really want to carry twins?

She nodded with a knowing smile. "Yes, and you know that rumor that they always skip a generation? In our family, that's no rumor. I didn't have a twin, but my dad had a twin brother. Identical twins. I often confused my Uncle George with my own father. I never knew her, but apparently, my great grandmother was also a twin. My girls were identical twins too, but I never had a problem knowing them apart, Everybody else did though. My Jim had the hardest time, but the girls gave him hell. They'd often trade clothes just to confuse him. So then, Ella gave birth to Christian, no twin. Now, it's time for twins again." Her eyes glistened as she said that.

Christian didn't respond, but he reached over and caressed my tummy, and the smile he gave me just about melted me into a puddle on the floor.

"Well..." I said. "I'm glad you told us. I'll have some time to... uhmm... think about that."

Grandma Liz could not stop smiling. "I did it, my dear, and if I did it, anybody can do it," she told me, recognizing my fear right away. "It's not as scary as you think. And I'm sure medical care has come a long way since my girls were born."

After that, we'd talked a little more about Seattle, and I could see that she was very interested in the idea of moving there when she was released and permitted to leave the state. I thought about our boathouse at the new house and wondered about the possibility of transforming it into an apartment for Grandma Liz. She'd quickly won my heart. There was just something about her.

After we left Detroit, instead of flying West back to Seattle, we flew East and visited Derrick in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Christian's cousin was just as funny in person as he had been on the phone, and he had a little bit of a hero worship thing going on with us. Apparently, he knew all about GEH and Ismintis International, even things the general public didn't necessarily know but that you could find out if you studied our companies closely enough. After consulting me and getting my permission, Christian told Derrick about our plans to merge and become Ismintis-Grey, but swore him to secrecy since only our family and executive staff knew yet. We learned more from Derrick about his plan to study abroad at Cambridge next semester, and what he planned to study in his final year at Harvard after that.

Over dinner Saturday night, we learned that Derrick was currently looking for a summer internship for this coming summer. With nothing more than a glance at each other, Christian and I both looked at Derrick and simultaneously I asked, "How about Ismintis-Grey?" while Christian asked, "Would you like to work for us?"

Derrick's jaw hit the floor. "You mean... are you serious? But you haven't interviewed me. You barely know me."

Christian answered, "We just spent the day with you. You've told us all about your career plans, and you did it under no pretenses."

"Besides," I added, "Christian and I are both good judges of character. We wouldn't have achieved the success we have if we weren't. And I like you, Derrick."

"But understand this," Christian said soberly, "I'm... we're... not offering you this position because you're my cousin. I don't intend to show you any favoritism just because you're my relative. I want to see what you're made of. I'm impressed with what I've seen so far. You've kept your grades up at Harvard, and that's not an easy feat. But working for our company will be a different thing completely. Let's see if you're able to put into practice all the shit you've learned in all those classes that I always believed were a waste of time. Maybe you can prove me wrong. Either way, if you prove yourself to me over the summer, there could be a position for you longer term. But remember, no favoritism."

"I understand," Derrick responded, still looking flabbergasted. "And... about the classes. Yes, some of them probably have been a waste of time, but I've enjoyed the overall Harvard experience very much. I wouldn't trade it for the world. And others have been really eye-opening. Your own business model is debated among the professors here. Some of them think you're a genius. I'm in their camp, as I'm sure you've already realized. Others think what you're doing isn't sustainable. But I think they just like to hear themselves talk."

That interested me. "Why do they say it isn't sustainable?" I asked Derrick. We spend another hour or two discussing the business theories of these professors, and we all three decided in the end that the professors were short-sighted and full of shit.

We finally returned to Seattle on Sunday and spent the rest of the day just playing with Christina and talking with Grace and Carrick, telling them all about Christian's newly discovered birth family. Christian described each new family member in detail, and they hung on to his every word, so eager and interested to walk with him through the process of getting to know his birth family. I realized more than ever just how blessed Christian was. Christian didn't mention visiting the cemetery to them... I think he just wasn't ready to talk about it yet. It had been different talking with Grandma Liz about it, because those were her loved ones buried there too, and she'd been in prison so unable to visit their graves for many years.

On Monday, Christian left early for work, as he did everyday this week. After recovering from my ghastly nightmare and subsequent sick stomach, I spent all of Monday with Christina, and I have to admit, I needed the down time. We spend hours just playing with her toys, which she had more of now than she'd had before we'd left for Michigan. Somebody was spoiling her. We also watched a Disney movie together, and I was impressed not only that it kept her attention the whole time but also that she was able to sing along to some of the songs. My adorable girl!

During Christina's nap, I had a lengthy phone conversation with Raina about her proposed non-profit. During the conversation, I had an epiphany, but I didn't share it with Raina. Instead, I waited until Christian had come home that evening.

"Have we put our penthouses on the market yet?" I asked him.

"No, not yet," he answered. "Why are you asking, babe?"

"Because I had an idea for them today. I don't want to sell them."

Christian looked at me with those concerned gray eyes that I'd come to know so well. "What plan are you hatching now?" he asked suspiciously.

I answered by excitedly sharing my epiphany with him. "I want to gut all three of them and remodel them into safe houses for abuse victims. They could be places of refuge for trafficking victims that Ken and Raina rescue, or for others who need a safe place to go, kind of like a half-way house, like Raina has talked about. One of the houses could be for boys. The other two could be used for girls and still have plenty of space for needed classrooms, offices, and whatever else would be needed. I'm not even sure what all they'd need, but we can hire people to figure it all out."

Christian smiled sadly, and I wasn't sure what his expression meant. "I'm glad that you're excited about this, Princess. Just... let's take it slowly, OK? You're Anastasia fucking Steele, and everyone knows you're a badass. When you hatch an idea like this one that you've hatched for our foundation, you put everything you have behind it, and it succeeds. It's how you became a billionaire. But Ana... you're still recovering, babe. Slow down and give yourself enough time to fully recover before you take on the world. We don't have to save all the abuse victims in the world overnight."

"But... do you like the idea?" I asked him tentatively.

He smiled sadly again and nodded. "I love the idea, Princess," he answered. "It's so much better than selling the penthouses. It's not like we need the money, and Ken and Raina said they need a place like what you're describing. I like the idea of completely transforming a place where something so... terrifying... happened, and making it into a place of... hope. If we can turn our penthouses over to them and let them run with it, then I'm all for it. But if it means that we get directly involved... I don't think it's a good idea to go back there, Ana. Not for either of us. Not right now."

I nodded in understanding. "I agree."

"Do you?" Christian asked. "Does that mean that if I agree with you that we should donate our penthouses... I'll donate the two that are still in my name, and you donate yours... then you'll agree to turn them over to Ken and Raina's charity and wipe your hands of them. You won't insist on staying involved in what goes on there? You'll completely step away from it?"

"For now, yes," I agreed. "I don't think I'm ready to... to see Escala again." I shivered at the thought, remembering my latest nightmare.

"Good," Christian said, but his face still showed concern. He stroked my hand gently and lovingly as he asked, "So... is it official then? Do you want to donate all three of our penthouses to Raina and Ken's non-profit and then let them figure out how to remodel them? We can donate enough money to cover the costs of renovations and furniture and shit. If so, I can get my lawyers on it tomorrow. And yours too, if you want."

"Yeah, that sounds perfect," I agreed.

Christian continued, "I need you to promise me, Ana, that you won't go back there. You just admitted to me that you aren't ready, but I know how you are, if you get a fucking bee in your bonnet. But I agree that you aren't ready, and I know I'm sure the hell not ready to see that place again. I told Mia and Leo that if they choose that location for their cafe, I'm all in, but I can't go there, at least not yet. I think they understood. Promise me, Ana. If either of us ever goes back to Escala, we have to talk it through first. And it's not going to be anytime fucking soon."

"OK, I promise," I responded. I knew I didn't want to go back to the scene of the most horrific thing that had ever happened to me... not until it had been completely transformed into something else, so I no longer recognized it.

With Christian's blessing, on Tuesday, I had lunch with Raina, during which I told her about our plan to donate our Escala penthouses. I made her cry. By the end of the day, Christian and I had our lawyers and accountants working on the donations, which they advised us to complete before the end of the month so that we could claim it on this year's taxes. OK, whatever. I knew Christian and I didn't really care, but this was what we paid them for. I was simply happy that our penthouses were going to be used for a good cause.

During our lunch, Raina also shared some important information with me. Joseph Horowitz had been spotted returning to Seattle. Christian and I didn't know the details of how they'd gotten him to return, but apparently, there was a sting in place, and she expected that he'd be either dead or behind bars before the end of the week. Her words scared me, and I was glad I had Sam and Dre accompanying me everywhere I went. My fear was ridiculous and irrational, really, because Joseph Horowitz didn't even know me or have any kind of beef with me. But in spite of that, I'd rest easier when he was behind bars.

Later that afternoon, while Christina played nearby, I did some research and wrote a few emails to begin to set plans for our foundation into motion. When Christian got home that evening, he had a few questions about the emails that I'd copied him on. Above all, he just wanted me to slow down and make sure I'd completely healed before I got too busy. He didn't understand that being busy was helping me heal. I needed to do something to keep my mind off those awful nightmares that I'd started having after he left for work each morning.

Wednesday was an exciting day because of two pieces of news that Christian surprised me with that morning. For the first morning since we'd returned from Michigan, he didn't go to work early, and I didn't have a nightmare or get sick. I even felt like eating a big breakfast. Over breakfast, he shared the news with me. The first was business related.

"I have two meetings this morning," he told me, "both via Skype, and both with business leaders in Addis Ababa that I want us to work with. I've researched them thoroughly, and I think they will provide the in that we need with the Ethiopian government, so your dream of the girls' schools will become a reality. One of their companies is ripe for take-over, and the other one's CEO is interested in selling before he retires."

"Who are they?" I asked, deeply interested.

Christian looked pleased. "The bigger one, which you might recognize from your own research, is Oromia International Bank. It's a popular bank with hundreds of branches throughout the country."

I was surprised. "Christian, that's one of the most influential private banks in Ethiopia. In fact, if I'm not mistaken, they're the ones who pioneered interest-free banking services. It's made a tremendous difference to the economy of the region."

Christian nodded, "I haven't done the extensive research you have, but I know that much."

"And OIB is ripe for takeover?" I confirmed, because it still seemed very surprising. "Do you mean to buy them out and make them a subsidiary of Ismintis-Grey? Surely, you don't want to change their name. I don't think that would go over well."

Christian nodded again. "I agree. They're already well-known as Oromia International Bank. There's no reason to change it for now. The agents in the government that we want to impress will know who's behind it. And yes, it is definitely ripe for takeover." Christian brought his laptop over to where I was seated on the sofa. "Here, let me show you."

We spent about twenty minutes pouring over spreadsheets, and in the end, I was just as convinced as Christian that we should buy Oromia International Bank out. In fact, I felt that they needed us, because without a major investor like us, they were likely to fail. As much as I hated the idea of being a "white savior," I didn't want to see the economic crisis that would ensue if the bank failed.

"Who's the second business?" I asked Christian.

He answered, "The guy who wants to retire is Berhanu Temesgen. His company is called Queen of Sheba Investments. It's small, but it has potential. I think he would have had more success if he had focused more on micro-finance. I mean, he did to a degree, but I think he should have gone... smaller. Truly micro micro. Have you done much research in the area of small business loans in developing nations?"

"I have," I replied, but I was surprised Christian was thinking in this direction. "There are a number of investors who have had quite a bit of success with it in Addis Ababa. But... surely you know... there's not much money in it for investors. That's not really the point of it. Actually, the rate of payback is much higher than with traditional loans when the micro-business plan is managed well, through peer groups in particular. But typically, the money paid back goes to finance new loans. So it funds itself, but it doesn't make us millions."

"Yes, I know," Christian said. "And I think that's what we should do. We aren't investing in Ethiopia to make money. You and I have already agreed that we have plenty. But I don't think we're gong to lose money either, not if we do this right. Not that it will make much of a difference to us if we end up losing some money, but I don't expect that to happen. I think we should model it after the Grameen Bank in Bangladesh."

I was amazed at his words. "You want to model it after the Grameen Bank?"

He looked confused. "Why not? Muhammad Yunus was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for founding it, and it's made a huge difference in that region. It's lifted people out of poverty. Anastasia, I think we've agreed that we have plenty of money of our own, and that we want to give back. If we can do that in a way that enables people instead of just giving handouts, so much the better. If we do it in a way that pays for itself, we can just keep doing it indefinitely. If it were a large payout, then it would have a timetable. But the way I see it, the only timetable we need is in regard to your schools. This is something I can really get behind... as long as we've done our research and determined its likelihood of success in East Africa. It's failed in some places it's been tried. But you've been researching Ethiopia already, so what have you found out?"

Christian and I spent about half an hour talking through the possibilities for micro-finance in Addis Ababa. I knew from my research that there had already been much success in this area, and there was certainly room for more. I saw great potential with Queen of Sheba Investments.

The other piece of news was about our new house. "It will be ready to move into this weekend," Christian announced. "All the furniture we ordered last week is being delivered this week. Everything's going like clockwork so far. Elliot said all the inspections have been completed and everything looks great. I'd have felt better if he'd been here to do the inspections himself, but he's having the time of his life with Kate in Australia. Anyway, he explained that he'd need to hire official inspectors either way, and he also insisted that his people know what they're doing. So I trust him. We'll be in our house before Christmas, baby."

"Christian, that's wonderful news!" I responded happily. As much as I loved Grace and Carrick... and Mia and Leo... and all the staff... I was ready to be in our own house.

Later that day, I had lunch with Luke and Emily Sawyer. Luke was doing so well, which made me very happy. His memory had almost completely returned, and his physical therapy was almost complete, mainly because Luke had been working so hard that he'd jumped though all the hoops his therapist needed him to in about double the time of an average person. I found out, to my delight, Luke had a special kind of motivation to complete the physical therapy. Emily filled in the blanks here, explaining that Luke's therapist was a cute petite blond named Rebecca Porter, and Luke had been bitten by the love bug. Apparently, Becca, as they both called her, refused to even consider doing out on a date with him as long as he was her patient. Emily said that Luke probably only had another week or two at most before he would have completed all the steps in therapy, so hopefully, the two of them would be dating by Christmas. Emily was convinced that Becca was just as smitten with Luke as he was with her. A woman just knows these things, Emily had insisted.

I set Luke's mind at ease when I told him that I wanted him to take the rest of December and all of January off, with pay, and then come back to work on February 1, if he was recovered enough. I could see the concern in his eyes regarding his job when I showed up with Sam and Dre. He could see that I had already replaced him. Actually, nothing could have been further from the truth. As much as I liked Sam and Dre, I could see how close they were getting. Sam's walls were slowly chipping away, the longer she and Dre were together. It was just a matter of time before they both admitted what they were feeling for one another. Even the most professional of security guards would have trouble staying focused on the job all the time when working constantly with the person that they were falling in love with. I wasn't planning to fire either of them, and I wanted to see things work out between them, but I knew it would be smart to separate them at some point in the future. Our need for security was always increasing, so I didn't foresee a problem with having Sam and Luke protecting me in the future and reassigning Dre somewhere not too far away.

That afternoon, after I'd gotten back to Grey Manor and was cuddling with Christina while we played a game on my iPhone, I got a package from Kate, who was still on her honeymoon with Elliot, but she'd ordered this for me a couple of weeks ago and had it delivered to Grey Manor. When I opened it, I couldn't have been more thrilled. Christina watched me open the package, and her eyes got big when she saw what was inside.

"Mommy!" she called out excitedly.

I smiled and responded, "Yes, beautiful Mommy, my sweet girl."

The enlarged still shot of Leila that I'd asked Kate to have made had arrived just in time for us to move into our new house. Kate had gotten them to do an 18 by 20 portrait of Leila in the lavender dress that she'd worn at the interview, and it was framed in an antique gold frame. Leila truly looked like an angel, our Lavender Angel. I knew exactly where in Christina's room the photograph of her first mommy would go. She would be like a guardian angel, watching over Christina, just as she always had when she was alive. Someday, when Christina was grown up, I would tell her the story of how her first mommy had saved my life. I needed a good cry after that, which I'd thankfully recovered from before Christian came home from work. When he saw the picture of Leila, I thought for a moment that he was also going to cry. He simply stared at it for the longest time. I broke the silence by telling him my plans for hanging it in Christina's room, and he agreed with me wholeheartedly.

Thursday morning, after I recovered from my nightmare and being sick, I had my counseling session with Geeta. She was willing to come by Grey Manor as she had in the past, which I greatly appreciated. It was good talking with her, expressing my fears of never getting free of the nightmares. When I explained to her how I was trying to keep myself busy so I didn't have time to think about the nightmares, she gave me a word of warning. According to Geeta, even though it was extremely painful, I needed to deal with shit instead of avoid it. She pointed out how I was using the work I was doing for our foundation to avoid dealing with my nightmares, or reliving the trauma. Well, shit. Was that what I was doing? I wasn't sure, but I knew I needed to listen to Geeta. We set up a new schedule, three times per week, beginning on Monday, and she said she'd have no problem coming out to our new house. I was paying her well, and she knew it. But more than that, I think she really wanted to see me recover and do the things I'd talked with her about.

Later that day, I had another long conversation with Raina about the non-profit and their plans for Escala. They'd had time to think about it and start drawing rough plans. They were planning to hire an architect in the next week or two. I also asked her about Joseph Horowitz, and I was horrified to learn that the tail the FBI had placed on him had lost him. He was in hiding again, and Raina wasn't even sure he was still in the area, or even in the country. She told me that Ken wanted her to stay home for the next few days and not go anywhere without him. Shit! That scared me. I recalled how Jack Hyde had "disappeared" before he'd attacked me. Was Joseph Horowitz planning something like that, with Raina as his victim? I agreed with her that she needed to stay home until he was captured.

After talking with Raina, I wrote a few more emails, responding to responses that I'd gotten the ball rolling on earlier in the week, all regarding our foundation. Of course, I copied Christian on everything. Everything was coming together nicely. Then, I spent the rest of Thursday playing with Christina and packing our stuff. We were moving into our new house the next day.

Christian was late coming home that evening, but I waited for him before I had dinner. Although Grace's cook was amazing, I'd missed Gail's cooking, so I asked her to prepare her meatloaf. Christian and I both had seconds.

Later that night, we showered together, and then I had Christian exactly where I wanted him, right there in the shower stall, which was much smaller than the one in our new house, but we didn't really need much room for what we were doing.

"Yes! Right there! Yes! Yes! Oh, God, yes! Harder, Christian! Fuck me harder!"

"This is as hard as it gets, Princess," Christian insisted. "Until Dr. Perkins..."

"Oh, fuck Dr. Perkins!" I interrupted. "I need... Yes, right there! Oh! I'm going to come!"

"Give it to me, Princess," Christian commanded, and his Dominant tone was all it took to push me over the edge.

A few minutes later, after we'd both come down from our orgasms, rinsed off in the shower, and wrapped our bathrobes around each other, Christian chuckled and asked, "So... fuck Dr. Perkins? He's not exactly my type, Princess, and he doesn't seem like yours either."

I giggled, but then I explained, "You know I like it hard. It's just... frustrating."

"But you liked that, even if it wasn't..." Christian didn't finish his sentence because I had bolted across the room to the toilet where I lost all my dinner. And damn, it had been really good dinner. Gail's meatloaf was killer, and she put some kind of secret ingredient in her mashed potatoes that made them extra creamy and delicious.

"Anastasia," Christian used his Dom tone again, but this time instead of giving me an orgasm, it signaled that I was in trouble. He'd waited until I was finished, and he'd lovingly held my hair back, and wiped my face with a wet washcloth when I was done. He'd waited patiently for me to brush my teeth. But now, it was time for the inquisition. "How long has this been going on?"

"Ummm..." I didn't want to tell him that I'd been vomiting all week. Until now, it had always been right after a nightmare, so I'd thought it was just nerves. There was no explanation for why I'd just gotten sick. I didn't want to answer Christian's question because I didn't want him to worry about me any more than he already was. When we'd been in Michigan, I'd only vomited a couple of times, and Christian had been busy working on his laptop both times, so he hadn't noticed.

"Anastasia," he repeated in a warning tone.

"Christian, I feel fine," I insisted. "So I throw up sometimes. I'm sure you've noticed that my appetite has returned. I'm enjoying eating."

"How long?" he repeated, and I knew from his tone that he wasn't happy about having to repeat himself.

I sighed. "I've been vomiting... occasionally... since the morning of my last doctor's visit."

"How often is 'occasionally'?" he demanded.

"Ummm... maybe... about once every day or two?" Well, today had been twice, but that wasn't typical. When I saw his reaction, I was glad I hadn't added that last part out loud.

"You've been puking every day for almost two weeks?" he shouted. "You fucking promised you'd tell the doctor if it continued to be a problem!"

"But I don't feel sick!" I insisted. "Well, I feel kind of sick right now, but it never lasts very long. It's not even everyday that I throw up! It's only about four or five times a week."

"Only four or five times per week?" Christian looked at me as if I had two heads.

"Christian..." I wanted to try to reason with him, but he held up his hand to stop me. He shook his head in exasperation, and then he picked up his cell phone. "Who are you calling?" I asked.

"Dr. Perkins?" he said, but not in answer to my question. He had the doctor on the line. "I realize that Anastasia has an appointment on Monday, but I wondered if we might bump it up to tomorrow morning. It seems that the problem that she was having with vomiting has not improved. She's still sick." Christian listened for a moment before responding, "No, that's perfect. Thank you for making the time for us. We will see you then."

When he'd ended the call, I asked, "Was that really necessary?" I was beginning to feel angry, even though I knew he was just trying to take care of me.

"Apparently, yes, it was," he replied angrily. What the fuck? He was angry with me?

"Christian... I don't need you to..."

"Don't tell me what you think you fucking need or don't need, Anastasia. You've been sick for weeks now, and you aren't even seeking medical advice. Instead, you're seeking ways to put yourself at risk even more, thinking you're somehow going to save all the abused people in the world... Well, I'm done, Ana. Until you are well, there will be no more talk of how we're going to publicly expose ourselves."

Now I was angry. "So you're what...? Giving me an ultimatum? Just who the hell do you think you are?"

My words must have shocked him, because he didn't respond immediately. He just stared at me. Finally, he blinked. Then, his words melted my heart. "I'm still the man who loves Anastasia Steele, and I'll do anything in my power to protect her... even from herself." With that, he turned and left the room.


	51. Ch 51: Ana's Illness Is Explained (CPOV)

**Chapter 51: Ana's illness is explained** (Christian's POV)

I'm not sure how long I sat at the piano in my parents' music room playing absently, thinking about everything that had happened in my life in the past two months. If anyone had told me how much my entire way of looking at the world would change in such a short time, I'd have told them they were fucking crazy. But that was before Anastasia Steele and Christina Grey entered my life and turned it upside down.

My child, Christina... I could keep her safe. I was confident in my ability to protect her. But my fiancee, not so much. Ana was so headstrong, and I loved her for it. I fucking loved everything about her. But sometimes she drove me batshit crazy. How could she be so fucking careless with her health?

Once again, I asked myself the question that had been haunting me over the past few days. Could she be pregnant? If she'd been pregnant when Hyde attacked her, how did she not lose the baby when he brutalized her? If she wasn't pregnant yet then, and she was now, then the only explanation would be that Hyde... no, I couldn't go there. Please, God, no!

I thought back to her last period... she'd only had one since we'd been together, and it was when I was in Paris, when I'd convinced her to play with herself in spite of her period. Then, I'd come home to the surprise of Christina. That seemed like ages ago, but it was actually about six weeks. All that had happened at the end of October, and now, it was mid-December. Didn't that mean she was late? Didn't most women have a period every month? What the hell did I know about that? I tried to think back to my subs, but I honestly couldn't remember much, except for a couple of them who'd had period sex as a hard limit. Thinking about them made my head hurt, so I put them out of my mind and focused on my Princess. I was pretty sure she was late. But she'd been under a tremendous amount of stress caused by a traumatic experience worse than most people could even imagine, so I wasn't sure if that would have affected her menstrual cycle. I wasn't sure about anything, and I was fucking worried. Ana wasn't ready to have a baby, mentally or physically.

I sensed her presence, even though she had not made any noise as she'd crept to the open door of the music room. I turned and made eye contact, hoping she couldn't see the worry in my eyes. Hers were full of worry too. Was she also afraid she was pregnant? Had it even occurred to her? I wasn't going to bring it up. I still hoped I was wrong, and I didn't want to give her more to think about than she already had.

She walked hesitantly towards me, and I scooted over so she could sit next to me at the piano. I continued to play absently as I studied her pale face. Shit, she looked sick.

"What are you playing?" she asked me softly.

"Something Mia left here," I answered, as I turned to the front of the sheet music and showed her. It was a new song by Ed Sheeran. "I don't think it's been released yet, at least not in the US. Apparently, Mia says the songwriter is a friend of a friend."

"Mia's friends with Ed Sheeran?" Ana asked me incredulously.

"Friend of a friend," I repeated. "She studied in culinary school in France with the brother of a close friend of his, or so she said. Anyway, she brought this back with her from France."

"It's autographed," Ana pointed out.

"Yeah, I'm surprised she left it out," I said. "When she showed it to me a couple of weeks ago, she treated it like it was some kind of treasure."

"Well, sure," Ana agreed. "He's really good. I love Ed Sheeran."

I made a mental note to find out if I could get him to play at our wedding, but I responded to Ana, "I'm not that impressed with this song."

"Can I hear it?" she asked.

I began to play the song "Perfect," which I'd only read through once, but it was very simple and easy to play, so I could continue to watch her face as I played. She watched my hands, and then she looked at the sheet music and read the lyrics. When she smiled, I looked back at the music and began to sing the chorus. When she kept smiling at me, I continued to sing the song through the second verse. I didn't have to look at the words to repeat the chorus. I watched her eyes fill with tears as I sang to her. Damn, why was she crying? I stopped playing and used my thumbs to wipe the tears that were beginning to fall.

"I love this song," she said. What? If she loved it, why the hell was she crying? "It's so sweet and simple. Is that why you don't like it? Because it's too simple?"

I shrugged and admitted, "I like to play arrangements that are a bit more... musically challenging." Then I changed the subject. "Why are you crying?" I asked her gently. I felt so confused by her words, which didn't match her tears. I knew she wasn't crying because I didn't like the fucking song. Who gives a shit about that, really?

"Because I love you?" she responded, more as a question. Was she not sure that she loved me? Or not sure why she was crying? She continued, "Because it's romantic the way you're singing it to me? Even though I don't look anywhere near perfect right now. I'm sure I look like shit. And because I'm sorry for the way I behaved earlier," she ended, the last statement not sounding like a question.

"You're always perfect to me, even when you don't feel like it," I responded. I didn't respond yet to her apology. I wasn't sure what to say about it. Instead, I asked her, "Were you sick again?"

She sighed, clearly not wanting to answer me, which gave me all the answer I needed. Finally, she said, "I had another nightmare. They always make me sick."

"You've been having nightmares?" I asked her. It was news to me, since I hadn't seen her have one since the night she called me from Hawaii.

She sighed again and then admitted, "Yes... over the past week, I've had a few. Always after you'd left for work. They make me sick. That's why I didn't think much about... being sick."

"Oh, Ana..." I put my arms around her and held her close.

"Please don't be mad at me," she cried on my shoulder.

"I'm not mad at you, Princess," I assured her. "Just worried, that's all."

"I know," she said. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I just didn't want you to worry more. I'm tired of everyone treating me like I'm a piece of fine china."

"You're more precious to me than fine china," I told her. "And I need you to let me take care of you."

She sighed again, but then she mumbled into my shoulder, "OK."

I leaned back and put my hand under her chin, forcing her to look me in the eye. "What was that?" I asked.

"I said OK," she responded, rolling her eyes.

"Did you just roll your eyes at me?" I asked her in my Dom voice.

The effect was immediate. I looked with satisfaction into her dilated eyes, not failing to notice her pebbled nipples or the hitch in her breath, and I asked her, "Do you mean that? Do you want me to take care of you?"

"Oh, God, yes," she moaned. Yes, she definitely wanted me to take care of her that way, but that was not what I was asking her at the moment. As much as I wanted to fuck her brains out and give her the multiple orgasms she craved, I needed more than that at the moment. Imagine that, Christian Grey needed more than sex from a woman. Not just any woman though.

"Ana, I need to ask you..." I began. She noted the change in my tone and looked contrite, obviously feeling guilty again for how she'd responded to me earlier in the evening. "Only a few days ago, we had a conversation about collaring. You told me you want me to claim your ass again." I didn't mention that she wanted me to make her forget that Hyde had been back there. Instead, I reminded her, "We toyed with the idea of a collaring ceremony. Do you remember that?" I asked her.

She nodded and looked at her hands, refusing to make eye contact with me. "I remember," she admitted reluctantly.

"So, what happened, Princess? Because the woman tonight who asked me who the hell I thought I was... after I called the doctor and made an appointment for you... after you puked your guts out... that was no submissive."

She sighed again before she replied. "I warned you from the beginning that I didn't want to be controlled outside of sex. I was... reacting. That said... I... I was wrong. I know why you called Dr. Perkins. I know you need to take care of me. And as much as I hate to admit it... I need that right now. I need you, Christian. And I don't mean sexually, although, I obviously need you that way too. Just... be patient with me, please. It's hard for me to... outside of sex... for me to give up control. I hate not having control. I've already given up control of Ismintis to you, and there's nobody I trust more than you with it. But... I thought by keeping busy with our foundation, that I'd be able to..."

I stopped her rambling with a kiss. God, she tasted good. She'd clearly brushed her teeth and used mouthwash very recently. We kissed tenderly for a few sweet moments before I told her, "I get it, Princess. It's one of the reasons I'm looking forward to you being my co-CEO. I don't need to control you all the time. I'll even enjoy submitting to you sometimes. Just let me love you."

She nodded, and I wiped away the tears on her face before I kissed her tenderly again.

* * *

At 7:30 the next morning, after both of us got far too little sleep, we sat in Dr. Perkins office waiting for him to return with a diagnosis. We'd already been there for half an hour, the doctor graciously agreeing to fit us in before his scheduled appointments. She'd been scanned and probed, and now we were waiting for results.

As soon as he walked back though the door, I felt a stab of panic, because I saw the concern on his wizened old face. "What is it, doctor?" I asked him impatiently.

He paused, and looked at Anastasia before looking at me. Finally, he answered as he looked at Ana again, "Well, the good news is that your digestive organs have healed very nicely, Ms. Steele. We do not need to schedule any more follow-up visits."

"But... why is she throwing up?" I asked.

Dr. Perkins looked uncomfortable as he said, "Ms. Steele, there is something... I just want to make sure you are fine with Mr. Grey being here to hear what I'm about to tell you, or if you'd rather keep the test results confidential."

Anastasia looked confused. "Of course, it's OK for him to be here. You can say anything concerning my health in front of my fiancé."

"Very well then," the doctor responded. He cleared his throat again before he continued with the words I'd feared but expected. "Ms. Steele, were you aware that you... are pregnant?"

All the color drained from Ana's face, and she stared at the doctor in shock. "What did you say?"

"You're pregnant, Ms. Steele," he repeated.

"No, no, that's impossible," she insisted.

"Not impossible," the doctor replied. "Your HCG level indicates that you are at least six weeks pregnant."

I could see from her wide eyes and labored breathing that she was beginning to panic. "Breathe, Ana. It's going to be OK, baby."

"How...? I have an IUD. And I... the surgery. The attack. How could a baby...? How is this even possible?"

Dr. Perkins responded patiently, "Well, no birth control measure is 100% reliable. Even intra-uterine devices can fail. And as for the attack... your digestive organs were damaged but are now healing very well. Your reproductive organs were not damaged in the attack. While I admit that would be surprising for a fetus to survive that kind of attack, it is not unheard of."

"But if I was pregnant... wasn't a pregnancy test done when I was... after the attack? Why wasn't I informed then?"

"I can assure you, Ms. Steele, that someone would have informed you if you'd had a positive pregnancy test at the time of your trauma."

Anastasia's eyes grew wider, and she began to hyperventilate. I knew she'd connected the dots, and was now freaking out because she'd realized the possibility of fucking Hyde being the father. She looked at me in panic, unable to speak.

"Breathe, baby. Breathe with me." I inhaled and exhaled slowly, motioning for her to follow my lead, which she did. She was still freaking out though.

"Ms. Steele, listen to your fiancé. We don't need you having a panic attack," Dr. Perkins said gently. Slowly, she followed my lead and regulated her breathing.

I decided to ask questions that I knew Ana would also want to know the answers to, but was unable to ask.

"How many weeks is she?" I first asked.

Dr. Perkins shook his head before he answered, "I can't say for sure. I'm a surgeon. All I can tell you is that she's somewhere between six and twelve weeks, according to her HCG level. She'll need to visit her OB-GYN to find out more. I'd advise making an appointment as soon as possible."

I continued to help Ana breathe as we listened to Dr. Perkins, and then I asked, "Is it possible that she was already pregnant when... when she was attacked...? Is there a reason that might explain why she didn't test positive?"

"Yes, it's very possible," Dr. Perkins answered. "If the time of conception was a week or less, or possibly even a little more, the pregnancy test wouldn't have detected it yet."

Ana spoke, haltingly, "Or... the baby... might have been conceived... during the attack." She was no longer able to control her tears, though I knew she'd been fighting hard to.

Dr. Perkins shook his head again, but he answered quietly, "It is a possibility."

"But they did a rape kit, right?" I asked.

"Yes, but all that does is collect DNA evidence, in case the attacker is still... out there. A rape kit, unfortunately, won't prevent pregnancy."

"Well, why didn't anyone say so?" I asked angrily. "She could have taken a morning after pill."

Dr. Perkins shook his head again. It was becoming an annoying habit. "Again, it's not my area. I'm just the surgeon."

"Right," I responded without malice. It wasn't his area. Fine, then. Focus on his area. "So, you said she's healing well from her surgery. How will a pregnancy affect her recovery?"

The doctor responded, "She'll need to continue to take it easy, but I don't anticipate any major concerns. We'll need to keep an eye on things. Her OB-GYN can do that at regular check-ups, and alert me if there are any concerns."

"It sounds like we're done here, and we need to get to her OB-GYN right away," I said.

He actually looked relieved. "Yes, that is correct. But call me if you have any concerns related to her recovery."

Ten minutes later, Ana was dressed and we were walking with Wesson and Prescott to our SUV, where Taylor and Peres were waiting in a second SUV. Ana was clearly still in shock, so I took it upon myself to call Dr. Miranda Greene, whom I'd met after Ana's attack. After another twenty minutes of runaround, during which I spoke with Dr. Greene's calling service, then to her directly by calling her personal cell phone, then with her assistant, I found out that Dr. Greene was in Chicago at a medical conference and wouldn't be back in the office until Monday. I tried to convince her to come as soon as she was back in town to my parents' home... I didn't think Ana would be mentally ready to move into our new house this weekend now... but Dr. Greene assured me that her office would be the best place to meet. I'd told her that we suspected Ana was pregnant, so she explained she needed to have access to the ultrasound equipment. I was tempted to purchase whatever ultrasound equipment we needed, but I'm sure it would have taken longer than the weekend to get it delivered.

"Christian," Ana whispered when I threw my phone across the backseat in frustration. We were seated in the back of my SUV, and I'd just confirmed an appointment for 8 a.m. on Monday with Dr. Greene's assistant. We would have to wait the entire weekend with no news. Shit!

But the fear in my girl's voice quickly chased away any frustration I was feeling, and all I felt was concern. "Shh... it's going to be OK, baby," I tried to comfort her.

"Is it?" she asked. "What if it's his?"

"It's much more likely to be mine," I assured her.

"But what if it isn't?" she muttered. Tears were running down her face now.

I wiped her tears gently away and used the gentlest voice I could. "We'll find out. We'll get a paternity test done."

"I've heard that's dangerous to the fetus. I don't want to hurt it."

"We'll find out if we can do the test without endangering the fetus. We'll find out, sweetheart, I promise. And if it isn't mine... we can do what you want. We can get rid of it. We can find a family to adopt it. Or we can keep it and love it."

"Could you love it?" Ana asked, sounding shocked.

I shrugged. "Did you expect to love the child of one of my former submissives?"

"That's different," Ana objected. "Christina wasn't the product of... rape. And Leila wasn't a... monster. She loved you."

I sighed, feeling frustrated. I certainly didn't want to think about Leila right now, on top of everything else. "Ana... All I'm saying is... you have options. We'll figure it out. And I'm with you, no matter what."

Ana stared at me. "I can't believe you aren't going thermonuclear. Aren't you angry?"

"Not if it's mine," I responded. "I'm worried as fuck, but not angry. I don't think you're ready to be pregnant, even if it's mine. You're still recovering. You're the strongest woman I know, Anastasia, but even you need more time to recover from what you went through."

"So, you think I should get rid of it, either way?" she asked.

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "I'll support you, if that's what you want." Even if I'd had an answer, I'm not sure I'd have given it to her right then. She needed to feel in control, and I understood that need all too well. This needed to be her decision.

"I don't know either," she admitted. "I'm scared. What if it's his? If it's yours, I'm keeping it, no matter what. But if it's his... I don't know." She began to cry again.

"Shhh, come here" I comforted her by pulling her against my chest. As she cried on my shoulder, damn if I didn't shed a few tears of my own. Please God, don't let it be his.

I had some meetings at Ismintis that I couldn't postpone due to the upcoming merger with GEH, which was only a couple of weeks away, but I didn't want to leave Ana either, so I convinced her to come with me back to her old office. She reluctantly agreed, and before we entered the building, I could see her preparing herself to act normal in front of her employees. She made sure her make-up wasn't too smudged, and touched up her lipstick. She walked by my side with a smile plastered on her face. My poor princess... she fooled every fucker that saw her. Nobody knew but me... and our security... what turmoil she was actually in. She greeted her employees with grace and poise. I was incredibly impressed by her, but still worried as hell.

Her behavior as we entered Ismintis, along with our conversation from the previous evening, gave me the idea to include her in the meetings. In fact, before each meeting, all of which were with her department heads, I briefed her and got her opinion, and then I let her take the lead in each meeting. Nobody blinked an eye, although they understood that she was only there for the day and that I was still in charge every other day. Anastasia made sure they understood that. I made sure they understood that she'd be coming back as my co-CEO once we merged and she had recovered. I didn't mention that now she also had a pregnancy to get through. That's if she decided to keep it.

Thankfully, the meetings didn't take long, and I'd already planned to take the afternoon off since we were supposed to move into our new house. I thought that was off the table now, until Ana told me that she still wanted to do it.

"I need to get my mind off... everything. The distraction that you just gave me at Ismintis helped more than you realize. Thank you for that."

"You don't need to thank me, babe," I told her.

"No, but I really like how you're taking care of me. Moving into our new house is actually a good idea. Moping around at Grey Manor is the last thing I need to be doing right now."

"I don't want you to overdo it," I warned her.

"I won't, I promise," she assured me. "Please, Christian. Keeping busy will help me keep sane. Let's move into our home."

"This is not how I wanted the first day in our new house to be," I said in what I hoped was an apologetic tone, not a whiny one, although I sure as hell felt like whining.

She sighed and muttered, "It is what it is."

A few hours later, we were all moved in, and Ana seemed... calm. The furniture had already been moved in before we got there, and everything was miraculously exactly where we wanted it. Ana had spent the entire afternoon putting away clothes in our room and Christina's, and then she started working on her library. That was going to take some time. I stopped her in the middle of it, insisting that she eat dinner with me and Christina. She did so without complaining.

After dinner, we took Christina to her new room. She'd spent the day with Gail at Grey Manor, and then at a playground near our new home before Gail had brought her in time for the dinner, which we'd ordered in. So Christina hadn't seen her new room yet, and the way her face lit up in delight when she saw it made all the pain from the past few hours more bearable. Even Ana was smiling happily at the excitement in our little girl's voice as she squealed at all the new toys. Like the other three of the bedrooms on the third floor, her bedroom was actually a suite that included a sitting room, bedroom, and private bathroom. Our designer had turned the sitting room into a little girl's dream playroom, complete with a tea table where I could see her having endless tea parties with all her new stuffed animals, and a window seat that overlooked Lake Washington, where she could sit and read when she got older. Both of these, of course, had been Ana's idea. Christina's bedroom had a convertible crib/toddler bed and a daybed where someone could sleep if needed. The colors of the entire suite were pink, yellow, and lavender, and there were butterflies everywhere, covering all the fabrics on the bedding and windows, hanging from the ceiling, and even painted on the wall. On one of the bedroom walls there was a large mural that looked like something from a Disney film. We'd commissioned a local artist to do it. On another wall was the portrait of Leila. Ana insisted that Christina remember her, so she'd gotten Kate to get a photograph of her from the day of the interview. It only reminded me of what a fucked up asshole I'd been and how Leila had saved my ass. I still felt guilty, and that wasn't going to change anytime soon.

We spent all of Saturday at home, continuing to get settled in. Ana had spent a few more hours in her library while I'd had some daddy/daughter time with Christina enjoying her new playroom. The irony wasn't lost on me as I realized that this was the only kind of playroom that we'd ever see in this house. After Ana's attack, neither of us would ever want to step foot in that kind of playroom ever again.

Ana and I didn't mention her pregnancy for the rest of the weekend, until Sunday evening. We'd gone to brunch at my parents' home, as usual, but Ana hadn't felt well enough to eat much. She was feeling nauseous again. I explained to Mom that she'd overdone it with the move-in, which was also true. So we had an early evening in. After we got Christina to bed, we took a bath together in what Ana called our "ginormous new garden tub." I knew that it was one of the things she loved most about our new home.

When I got into the tub behind Ana, I spent some time massaging her shoulders and back with the citrusy jasmine oil that she loved so much. My girl was so tense, but I was able to get her to relax, at least a little. After a while, my hands worked their way around to her front. God, I loved her breasts. They were perfect. Somehow, without my realizing it, my hands covered her abdomen, where her baby bump would soon begin to grow. In my gut, I knew this baby was mine. Even if I didn't think she was ready, I longed to see her growing my baby. Damn, I'd become a pussy, but I didn't give a shit. I loved my daughter and Ana, and I wanted us to have more babies.

"I can't get rid of it," Ana whispered. "Even if it's... his. I just can't do it. It's an innocent baby. It's not it's fault... what that bastard did. I'm not going to be afraid of him anymore. He's dead. This baby, it doesn't deserve not to live just because..." Her voice trailed off, but she continued, "And it will never know. Can you live with that? If it's not yours? Can you... treat it like it's yours?"

Could I? Hell if I knew, but she needed my assurance. "I'll love this baby," I promised her. Besides, my gut told me it was mine, and my gut is never wrong.

* * *

We got to Dr. Greene's office at around 7:30 Monday morning, which was about half an hour early. Ana and I had both woken up around 5 a.m. unable to go back to sleep. We were both too anxious for information about the baby to sleep much, to eat much, or even to fuck much. We waited in Dr. Greene's waiting area for about twenty minutes, and then she called us in. It didn't take long to get Ana up on the examination table, sans panties. She'd worn a dress, which she didn't have to remove.

I watched in shock as the doctor shoved some kind of instrument up Ana's vagina. The thing was wearing a condom. What the fuck? "What is that thing?" I asked, which caused Ana to giggle. I guess I didn't do a good job of masking my shock.

The doctor smiled knowingly. "This early in pregnancy, the ultrasound needs to be trans-vaginal. We can see more that way." Well, OK then. Holy shit!

Moments later, we saw an inkblot drawing looking thing appear on the screen. The doctor seemed engrossed in it, so apparently, she knew how to read it. She kept moving around the thing she'd shoved up Ana's cunt until a bean shaped thing appeared on the screen. Was that what a baby looked like? Surely not. The doctor didn't speak as she continued to study the bean shaped thing, even zooming in. Nothing on the screen looked like anything to me. I held Ana's hand, watched the doctor's face, and tried to tap down my impatience.

"Christian, you're squeezing my hand," Ana whispered.

"Oh, sorry," I muttered, rubbing soothingly where I'd squeezed too hard.

Finally, Dr. Greene smiled at Ana reassuringly. "Well, congratulations, Ms. Steele. You're definitely expecting, and everything looks good so far. Your uterus is healthy. It wasn't impacted at all during your trauma, amazingly enough. The placenta looks healthy too. You're healthy and strong, and so..."

"How many weeks?" Ana interrupted anxiously.

"Well, we need to take a few more measurements before we can determine that. We typically start counting from the first day of your last menstrual cycle? When did you last menstruate?"

Ana looked at me as she tried to recall the date. I knew it because I'd been in Paris. "October 27th" I answered.

Dr. Greene looked at Ana for confirmation, and Ana nodded. The doctor looked confused for a moment. "Did it seem like a normal period to you? Or was it lighter or heaver than usual?"

Ana thought about it for a moment. "It wasn't heavy. It was pretty light."

The doctor nodded thoughtfully. "I think it's very likely that what you experienced on October 27th wasn't a period at all. Sometimes women experience spotting during fertilization, when the egg implants. Some women even continue to have their periods during pregnancy, but I don't think that's what's happening with you because you haven't had another one since then. If my suspicions are true, then your last period was actually the previous month. What would that have been, September 27th? Are your periods regular?

"Yes," Ana answered. "My last one, before the end of October was the end of September. I think it was September 28th."

"OK, based on that date, it means you're now at week 11. I think that's more accurate."

"You think?" I asked her. I needed more than just her guess.

"It's more in line with the measurements I just took," Dr. Greene explained.

"But..." Ana looked confused. "We've only been together a couple of months. And I have an IUD. How is any of this possible?"

Dr. Green studied the ultrasound equipment again, moving around the thing that she still had shoved up Ana's cunt. Damn, that thing was distracting. As she studied the screen, she asked Ana, "Did you ever notice anything about the IUD that felt strange, or any changes with the string?"

"I remember there being a string there just after it was implanted, but I haven't felt it in a long time," Ana answered.

Dr. Green pointed at the screen and said, "Look at this." She pointed out a funny-shaped thing on the screen. "Your device slipped out, and it's been here in your uterus. It hasn't caused any damage, and I'll remove it so it doesn't. This happens sometimes."

"So, I was completely unprotected," Ana said, more to herself than the doctor.

"Yes, if you didn't use condoms, you were unprotected," the doctor confirmed.

Ana's eyebrows were still wrinkled in deep thought. "I thought that ovulation was supposed to be two weeks after menstruation. But I didn't have sex until three weeks later. Right, Christian?" she asked turning to me. "It was October 21 when we first..."

"We used condoms," I reminded her. The first time we'd fucked had been at the play party, and we'd been required to use condoms.

"But we didn't the next day," she reminded me. "Or from then on."

The doctor interrupted our trip down memory lane. "There's no set time for ovulation, and all women are different. You could have ovulated anytime during the month. Three weeks after your period is very possible. In your case, it's probable."

"So you're sure that I'm at eleven weeks... not six weeks?" Ana asked hopefully.

"I'm pretty sure," Dr. Green affirmed. "We can't know with 100% accuracy until we run more tests. Considering the measurements I've just taken, I'd say it's much more likely that conception took place eight weeks ago, not six. But I understand your concern. To be frank, I know you're concerned about your attack, which is why I'd like to run a paternity test. It can safely be done at eight weeks, so we can do it today and get the results by tomorrow."

"And it's safe?" Ana asked. "I don't want to hurt it."

"It's noninvasive," the doctor explained. "All I need is to draw some blood from you, which we were going to do anyway, and get a swab from Mr. Grey."

"OK," Ana nodded.

The doctor smiled again and said, "There's more. Are you ready for more information about what I've discovered here?" She pointed at the bean-shaped inkblot on the screen. Her question annoyed the hell out of me. Why the fuck would we be here if we didn't want information? Just spill it already.

"Of course," Ana responded more politely than I felt was deserved.

The doctor pointed at the screen and explained. "See this spot right here?"

"Is that little bean my baby?" Ana asked in wonder.

"Well, that's your placenta. Here, let me zoom in again so you can see better. Inside the placenta, do you see this? This is the head, and this is the torso." The doctor pointed them out, and damn if I didn't see a baby.

"Is that little blip my baby?" Ana asked, her voice full of emotion.

"Well, yes, that is Baby A," the doctor replied.

"Baby A?" I asked, understanding immediately where this was headed.

"Yes," the doctor answered. "And see this one? This is the head, and these are the legs." She pointed at another inkblot. "That is Baby B." I saw it clear as day too. Two babies!

Ana's eyes just about popped out of her head. "Twins?!" she squealed.

The doctor nodded. "Twins," she affirmed. "They share a placenta, so this means they are identical twins."

I smiled more widely than I can remember ever smiling. "Twins run in my family," I announced proudly.

Ana wasn't convinced. "If they're identical... that means the paternity test will be accurate for both of them, right?

"Right," Dr. Greene answered. "Identical twins come from one sperm, so there's only one possible father. If they were fraternal, you'd see seeing two placentas, not one. If that were the case, we wouldn't be able to accurately determine the paternity for both of them."

"What? Really?" I asked.

The doctor nodded. "Fraternal twins can have different fathers. Identical twins cannot."

"Wow! Twins," Ana repeated, more to herself than me. "Remember what Grandma Liz said? Do you think she knew?"

"She couldn't have known," I responded, but I wondered the same thing as I thought back to her words to Ana, as if she'd been trying to prepare her for this.

The doctor interrupted our moment again. "Well, congratulations, Ms. Steele and Mr. Grey. It looks like come Independence Day of next year, if you make it to forty weeks, you're going to be the parents of twins!

I sure hoped so, not that I wouldn't keep my promise to Ana and love them anyway. If they turned out not to be mine, I'd never let them know it. But I was hopeful, because the doctor had just given me reason to believe that we had nothing to worry about with Hyde. But even though my gut had already told me that, I wouldn't rest until we had the test results.

* * *

The next morning at around 10 a.m., I was working at my computer in my office... well, Ana's office... at Ismintis, when she called me on Facetime.

"Ana?" I answered. "Are you OK?" I examined her face, and I was happy to see that she was glowing. Her smile lit up her face, and this told me everything I needed to know. I knew what the next words out of her mouth would be, and I was happier than I ever remember being in my entire fucked up life.

"I'm good, Christian. I'm more than good. They're yours, Christian. You are going to be the father of twins."

"Are you really good with this?" I asked her, trying to tap down my own joy just in case she wasn't as excited as I was.

"I'm scared shitless," she admitted. "But I'm happy, Christian. I want to have your babies. I already love them so much."

"So do I, Princess, so do I," I told her.

* * *

 _Author's note: "Perfect" by Ed Sheeran was released in March of 2017. The date that Christian was playing it for Ana was December 15, 2016._


	52. Ch 52: Dominance and Fluff (APOV)

**Chapter 52: Dominance and Fluff (Anastasia's POV)**

"Oh, my God, Christian! Our wedding!" I exclaimed as it dawned on me. We had everything planned for our February 25th wedding, and we'd sent the invitations out a few weeks ago... or to be more precise, our wedding planner had mailed them. Approximately 300 people had already received our invitations.

We were soaking in our magnificent garden tub, one of my favorite places in our new home, at the end of another very long and eventful day, but not as eventful as the day before had been. Yesterday, I'd found out that I was pregnant with twins, and then I'd gone to work with Christian again before going home and finishing putting away books in my library. Today, I'd learned that Christian was, without a doubt, the father of our twins. 99.97% is pretty damn certain. I'd also had lunch with Raina, and we included Ken this time in a working lunch in which we ironed out some details in their business plan for the non-profit they were starting. I'd come to agree with Christian that we needed to be silent partners in this endeavor, that our names didn't need to be all over the publicity for this new organization that would help survivors of human trafficking. We had not only Christina but now two new babies on the way that we needed to protect, and our children needed to be our top priority. But it didn't mean we couldn't provide the funding and expertise that Raina and Ken needed to get their non-profit off the ground. Later that afternoon, I'd also continued some work that I'd started the day before related to the publishing house that I'd purchased from Christian, SIP. I had purchased another smaller publishing company when GEH had "stolen" SIP from me, and now, I was working on merging them. Together, they would become Ismintis-Grey Press, but it would take several months to get there.

Now, it felt very good to relax with Christian. Thankfully, I had only gotten sick once in the past two days, and now that we knew it was morning sickness, nothing more, I wasn't concerned. Overall, I was feeling better than I had in a long time. I'd come to terms with the fact that I was pregnant with twins, and I think Christian had too. He'd seemed a lot less surprised than I had been. Now, we were facing each other in our tub, which was actually large enough for a few more people, and Christian was rubbing my feet. Heaven! Until it occurred to me that our wedding was two months away!

Christian smirked at me. "Our wedding, Princess? Why the panic? I can hardly wait to make you mine."

"I'm going to be a whale by then!" I moaned. I calculated the weeks in my head. "I'll be 20 weeks by then! Holy shit, that's halfway! I'll have to order a new dress. There's no way the one I've ordered will fit! Shit! I need to call Diane Kavanagh and get her to stop work on the one she's making. It will never fit now."

"Relax, Princess, it will be fine," Christian assured me. The humor in his eyes pissed me off. He was enjoying this.

"Christian, no matter how we try to avoid it, you know it's going to be a media spectacle. We decided together to have a large wedding, and we've invited some of the top people in the state. Hell, we invited the mayor, remember?"

"And the governors of both Washington and Michigan," Christian reminded me.

"Shit! I'm going to be as big as the side of a house!" I cried. "I'll be waddling down the aisle by then!"

He laughed. Actually fucking laughed out loud at me. I glared at him and spit my words, "I know you're not laughing at your very pregnant fiancee... who happens to be carrying _your_ twins! TWINS, Christian! As if twenty weeks isn't going to mean I'll have a very prominent baby bump as it is, but with twins, it'll be more than prominent. I can just see the tabloids now! 'Billionaire mogul Christian Grey weds beached whale!'"

Christian laughed again in response and playfully splashed water at me. "Ana, baby, relax!" he said. "You are the most beautiful woman in the world and will never look like a whale, beached or otherwise. So, we'll order you a new dress. Mrs. Kavanagh can recommend something that will work for you, with the adorable baby bump you'll have by then. You can either play it down, or show it off, baby. Be proud of it! I sure as hell am. Or.. better yet..." He looked at me hopefully as he suggested, "We can still elope. Hell, let's fly to Vegas tonight, baby! I can have my jet ready in an hour, and I'm sure you can too, if you prefer to take yours. We can get married tomorrow!"

His joy was contagious, and even though there was no fucking way I was going to agree to a Vegas wedding, I couldn't stop my smile. "Eloping is sounding better and better," I admitted, "but there's no way in hell I'm getting married in a drive-through chapel by an Elvis impersonator. Besides, we've already made all the preparations, and I'm looking forward to it... other than looking like a cow, that is."

Christian snorted. "Will you stop it already?" he said as he moved swiftly towards me, and before I knew it, I was straddling him, and he was kissing the hell out of me. When he ended the kiss, I gasped to catch my breath, but he seemed unaffected as he told me, "Get this through your stubborn head right now, Anastasia soon-to-be Grey. You are beautiful. You are perfect right now. You will be perfect in two months. Baby, I can hardly wait to see my children growing in you. Do you have any idea how hot that is? How sexy that baby bump is going to be?"

"Christian," I moaned. I was already horny most of the time, and his hands were roaming all over my body, turning me on even more.

He tweaked my nipples, which were really sensitive, and continued playing with them. "I love these. You realize your tits are already bigger than they were? And they're just going to keep growing. I don't see how you can possibly get more beautiful than you already are, but I know you will." He stopped talking long enough to suck my breast into his mouth as he continued to play with the other one. He kept this up for a while, and then switched breasts. God, I was going to spontaneously combust!

Damn if he didn't know that I was about to come. Before I could, he stopped his ministrations and started talking again. "You are so fucking hot, Princess. Do you have any idea what you do to me?" His hands kneaded my breasts as he continued, "And just to think, I'm going to be sharing these with my babies in just a few months. I can hardly wait to watch you feeding our babies, Ana. God, do you have any idea just how happy I am? How much I love you? How much I love these babies that are growing in here?" He moved his hands down and rubbed my tummy, which was still flat, for now. I knew it wouldn't be for long. Any day now, I was going to start showing. In fact, at eleven weeks with twins, it was amazing that I wasn't already beginning to show. But I didn't have time to think about that, because I needed to come!

"Christian, I need you!" I cried. I was trying my best to rub against him. I could feel his erection at my core, but I couldn't get the friction I needed.

"Shhh, I know, baby." The next thing I knew, he'd lifted me by my hips and lowered me back down on him. I heard myself moan in relief as he slid inside me. God, yes! That was more like it! I began to move, not caring that I was splashing water over the side of the tub. It was a wet room, after all.

"Thank God we don't have to be so damn gentle any more," I grunted as I bounced up and down, riding him.

I could see the worry in his eyes as he tried to slow me down by grasping my hips. Oh no, buddy. "Ana, I don't want to... Are you sure...?"

"Christian, you heard their heartbeats. You heard how strong they are. And you heard Dr. Greene say we can have sex. She didn't say we needed to be gentle. Trust me, I know what my body needs, and right now, I need your rock-hard cock. I need you to fuck me, hard."

That seemed to ease his worries, and I knew I'd won when he smirked at me and responded, "Your wish is my command." And then he took charge. I was still on top, but there was no question that he was the one in charge. Finally, he was fucking me the way I needed him to, but it still wasn't enough. Reading my mind, Christian suddenly pushed me and flipped me around so that I was leaning over the side of the tub with my arms bracing the side as he fucked me from behind. He didn't hold back, and I was in heaven. I reached my climax in no time at all, and still he pumped. When his talented fingers found my clit and my nipple, I came again, and still he pumped. He continued to rub my clit with one hand and moved the other to my rosebud, which was already slippery from my juices and the bath water, so his finger slipped right in. He pumped my ass through another orgasm as his engorged cock continued to pound me, and his finger rubbed my clit furiously. Holy shit! Three orgasms, and he lasted through all three, only finding his release after I did that third time. Finally... after weeks of frustration, I was sated.

"God, I've missed you," I whispered as we were both recovering. Whispering was all I could manage at that point. I wouldn't have surprised me if I'd waken the whole house up, I'd screamed so loud.

It took Christian a few more moments to recover. Finally, when he spoke, I was surprised by his words. "Ana, I want to fuck your ass. Do you think you're ready?"

"Mmm... yes, please," I moaned. I wrapped my hand around his now flaccid dick and said playfully, "More ready than you are."

Christian laughed and said, "You're playing with fire, Princess. Keep doing that, and I'll be ready before you know it."

"That's what I'm counting on," I told him.

Christian didn't respond with words. Instead, the next thing I knew, we were both standing up, and he was stepping out of the tub.

Over the next hour or so, Christian rocked my world in a way that he hadn't in a very long time. Thank God, I no longer had to beg him, and his eyes were filled with lust instead of worry.

When he'd asked me if I wanted to wear my collar, I immediately agreed. I wanted to submit to him again. I needed it. It was an additional step in our healing process to be able to play this way again. A few weeks ago, I hadn't been sure we would ever be able to do this again, but I had been craving submission to him, and I now saw clearly that Christian had also been craving his role as my Dominant. After almost losing me, he needed to reclaim me, and I needed him to.

That night, Christian surprised me with a few toys, including a butt plug that he soon had vibrating in my ass as his talented tongue pulled a couple more orgasms out of me. "These are all new," Christian assured me when he showed me the toys, which also included a few vibrators and some nipple clamps. I knew they were new, but I understood why he needed to reassure me. Of course he wouldn't have kept anything from our old playroom at Escala. Neither of us wanted any reminders from there.

And amazingly, when the time came for him to claim me as his once again, I did not have any flashbacks to my attack. I'd feared I would, but Christian dominated me so completely that there had not been space in my brain for any monsters, or anything else except my Master. At long last, I was free. I felt completely free from Jack Hyde, and that dead bastard could rot in hell.

"I love you, Master," I whispered to Christian as I snuggled in his arms after we were both too exhausted to do anything more than just lie there.

He responded by running his hand up and down my back and pulling me closer. Finally he spoke. "Where have you been all my life? And how did I ever live without you?"

I giggled and said, "I guess we were just waiting for the stars to align."

He smiled shyly, very different than the Dominant he had been just a few minutes earlier. "Come here," he said. He pulled me towards him and kissed my lips tenderly as he removed my collar. "No more playing tonight. I just want to hold you."

Moments later, we lay cuddling in our bed, talking. I began the conversation by talking about the lunch meeting I'd had with Raina and Ken. Christian already knew, of course, that we were meeting to discuss their business plan.

"So, I was wondering," I said. "Do you think that Japanese rope bondage thing is off limits now that I'm pregnant?"

"Anastasia, you didn't talk about that with them today, did you?" Christian asked, his voice full of disapproval.

I huffed a little. "Of course not. Christian, I may not be in the lifestyle... not really... but even I know that I shouldn't talk to another Dom without your permission, at least not about anything related to the lifestyle. We talked only about business today. Ken makes me uncomfortable when he goes all Dom, but he's fine when we're talking business. It's interesting to see how differently he and Raina behave in public though. I've been around Raina so much lately without him that I'd forgotten about their act.

"Did he make you uncomfortable today?" Christian asked. That seemed to have been all that he heard.

"Not at all," I answered. "I like him when he's not being a Dominant jackass. His business plan is really quite remarkable. He's determined not only to rescue as many girls as he can, but also to make sure that they get the help they need to be able to live quality lives after they get back out in the world. But anyway, you didn't answer my question."

Christian didn't look happy. "Ana, we aren't going to practice kinbaku while you're pregnant. Absolutely not."

I pressed him, "But don't you think it's possible to adapt it somehow so it would be safe? You wouldn't have to suspend me... unless there's a safe way to do that."

Christian insisted, "We will not do anything that will put you or our babies at risk. It's absolutely out of the question."

"But what if it didn't put us at risk?" I asked, ignoring the irritation in his voice.

Christian sighed. "You really want this, don't you?"

"I just want to find out if we can do it safely," I answered. "I agree... I don't want us to put our babies at risk either. But Christian... what we just did... I haven't felt that kind of release in a long time. After... what happened... I wasn't sure I ever could again. I need it more than I even realized."

Christian sighed again. "I'll talk to Ken about it. He's a master, after all. He'll know if there are ways we can adapt that would be safe for you and the babies. I'll have to tell him about them. Are you OK with that?"

"Well, we're going to be telling everyone soon. You can wait until we tell our family."

"Yeah, I wanted to ask you about that," Christian said. "How about making an announcement at our family Christmas Eve brunch?"

"Well, that's on Saturday. Four days from now. I'll be twelve weeks by then. Yes, I think that sounds good. I'm going to be showing soon, so we need to tell everyone. Should we do a press release?"

"What do you want to do?" he asked.

"I think I'd rather wait until after the New Year for that. We're merging and becoming Ismintis-Grey. If we announce our pregnancy, it will detract from that. Let's wait until I get too big to hide it. Thankfully, it's winter, so I can disguise it with sweaters and jackets."

"Sounds good," Christian agreed.

I sighed in contentment. "Can you believe how far we've come in only a couple of months? Would you ever have dreamed our lives would change this much so quickly?"

"Not at all, and the amazing thing is that I haven't freaked the fuck out about it all," Christian answered. "Flynn is about to lose his shit about all the changes he's seen in me in the past two months. He expected that I'd be the one losing my shit, especially after finding out about Christina, and then that fucking video being leaked. And then, with you almost dying. But no, as long as I have you, I'm good."

"I couldn't have said that better myself," I agreed. "Regardless of what has happened... as long as I have you, I'm good."

He kissed my neck and said, "And now, you're having my babies. Twins."

"No need to remind me," I told him, and then asked, just out of curiosity, "Would you rather have boys or girls?"

"Healthy babies," he replied. "I don't mind what gender."

I giggled again as I said, "I can only imagine what you're going to be like when they're teenagers, especially if we have three girls, all dating at the same time."

He was quiet for a moment, and I was tempted to lift my head so I could see the look on his face. Green, no doubt. But when he spoke he sounded confident. "None of my daughters will ever date until they're at least thirty, so it's a non-issue," he said. His voice sounded serious, but I knew he was full of shit. Then I was surprised when he continued. "When I found out about Christina, I was scared shitless," he said. "I never thought I'd be able to be a good father. Me, Christian Grey, a father. It seemed like the universe was playing a joke on me. Hell, I'm still not sure I won't end up fucking her up. But I love that little girl, more than I ever thought myself capable. I didn't know I could love someone like that. All I want is to keep her safe, to see her happy. That's what I want for these babies too."

"We should think about names," I suggested, to lighten the mood.

"We have nine months to name them," Christian responded. "There's no rush."

"No, but I like to think about it. Names are important to me. I want to make sure their names are meaningful."

Christian was quiet for a few moments. I assumed he was thinking, and this was confirmed when he asked me, "What do you think of the idea of naming them after important people in our lives?"

"I like the idea," I answered. "What were you thinking?"

"Well, Grace is my angel. She saved me. I'd like to name a daughter after her. And Grandma Liz is my hero. Elizabeth is a good name."

I agreed. "Want to know something really interesting? My grandmother's name was also Elizabeth. Well, actually, it was Elzbieta, but that's the Lithuanian form of Elizabeth. She went by Betty after she came to the US."

"So if we named one of our daughters Elizabeth, it could be in honor of both of our grandmothers?" Christian suggested.

"Yes, I like that," I responded. "But I wouldn't want to call her Betty. Maybe Lizzy."

"I like that," Christian agreed immediately. "Lizzy Grey."

"So if they're girls, one can be Elizabeth and the other Grace?" I asked. "Lizzy and Gracie?"

Christian made a sound of disapproval. "I don't much care for Gracie Grey. What if we named one Elizabeth Grace, and the other can be something else?" he suggested. "Who else would you want to name your children after?"

"Well, as far as girl names go, there's really only Carla, my mom," I answered.

"She was important to you," Christian observed.

"Well, yes..." I hesitated before I added, "I didn't realize how important until I didn't have her in my life anymore. She was more like a sister, or a friend, when I was growing up. Never like my friends' moms. God, that scares me. What if I'm a horrible mom? I didn't have a very good role model."

"Was she a horrible mom?" he asked.

"No, I don't mean it like that. She wasn't horrible. Just... self absorbed. My grandma was more of a nurturer. But... my mom was important to me, you're right. I just don't know if I want to name my child after her. I bought a publishing house for her. I think that's a more fitting way to honor her memory."

"What do you mean, you bought a publishing house for her?" Christian asked. Oh, right. I never explained to him why purchasing SIP had been so important to me.

"SIP," I answered. "The reason I was so pissed off at you for buying it out from under my nose was because it was something I was doing in tribute to my mom."

"I didn't realize that," he responded. "I mean, I noticed you were angrier about SIP than the other two companies, but I didn't know why it mattered so much. I recall you saying that there wasn't any money in a publishing house. Not sure I entirely agree, but I can see where you're coming from, if you compare it to our other investments." Christian was just as astute as ever.

I explained, "I didn't buy SIP to make money. I've spent the past few years doing nothing but making money, and I had a different purpose this time. I'm making sure it won't lose money, and I think in the long run, it will actually do better than I first anticipated, especially now that I'm merging it with Queen Anne Press. But that wasn't the point. I bought it so I could make my mom's dream come true. Just too late for her to see it."

"Your mom's dream?" Christian asked curiously.

I explained, "She wrote a book when I was a pre-teen. A series of books, actually, that both chronicled the lives of my grandparents and great-grandparents and also sucked you into an imaginary world. At least it did me, as a pre-teenage girl. It was about my family, but it was also a magical world, with everything from witches to unicorns. It was like a combination of Chronicles of Narnia and Anne Frank. And she was an amazing writer. In my opinion, it was just as good as Harry Potter."

"Let me guess. She never got it published." Bingo.

"She tried, but none of the publishers she sent a manuscript gave her the light of day. So I promised her when I was in college that someday, I would publish it. I intend to make good on that promise. I only wish she were still here to see the success that I know it's going to be."

"I'm sorry I never got to meet her," Christian said.

"Me too," I sighed. "I'm even sadder that these little guys will never know her." I rubbed my belly.

"But you didn't sound very excited about the idea of naming one of them after her," Christian observed.

"No, I'm not," I agreed. "I don't like the name Carla. She did, though. She chose it instead of the name she was given at birth, Carlotta."

"Is that Lithuanian?" Christian asked.

"No, Italian," I answered. "My grandparents had a neighbor who helped them when they first moved to America. Chicago. They named my mom after her. Grandma said it was the Italian form of Charlotte."

"So we could name one of our daughters Charlotte in honor of your mom?" Christian suggested.

"We could," I agreed. "Elizabeth and Charlotte. Lizzy and... what? Charlie? Lottie?"

"No," Christian objected. "I don't like either of those."

"I actually think I like Carlotta better than Charlotte. How about Carly as a nickname?"

"Nah... I don't know," Christian responded uncertainly. "What about Carl, if they're boys?"

"No, I hate that," I answered.

"Hate is a strong word," Christian quipped.

I ignored him. "Oh, I just remembered... my other grandma. Ray's mom. She died when I was eleven or twelve. We were close when I was little. Not as close as my maternal grandma, but she spoiled me. She always had homemade tea cookies. In fact, she was the one who got me started drinking tea. Anyway, her name was Lorraine."

"Carlotta Lorraine," Christian repeated. "Too many L's and R's."

"I agree," I said. "I don't like those names together. Our daughter would be nearly grown before she'd able to say her own name. What about you? You have other relatives whose names we could use."

Christian answered, "There's my Grandma Trevelyan. Her name is Ava. I like that. And I suppose there's also my other birth grandma. Emma Timms."

"I've always liked the name Emma," I told him.

"Elizabeth and Emma," Christian repeated. "My two birth grandmothers. Maybe. Or Elizabeth and Ava. That's OK too."

"I like all three names, but I think my preferences are Elizabeth and Emma. But what about Ella?" I asked tentatively.

Christian sighed. "I don't know. I'm still... processing things. My whole life, I believed... well, anyway, I was wrong. But if we have Elizabeth and Emma, we don't need Ella, do we?"

"Not unless there is another baby cooking in here," I joked. "Besides, Elizabeth and Ella are too similar, and Emma and Ella are too rhymy."

"Rhymy?" Christian asked. "Is that a word?"

"Probably not," I laughed. "But I don't want our twins' names to rhyme."

"Why not?" Christian asked.

"Because even if they're identical, they're still their own people," I explained.

"So... how about Elizabeth Grace and Emma Lorraine," Christian said. "That's not rhymy, is it?"

"No, not rhymy at all. Both are good names," I agreed.

Christian sounded happy when he said, "I like them. I think we've just named our twins. If they're girls."

"Yeah, but they aren't, so we should figure out some boy names now," I said.

"What do you mean, they aren't?" Christian asked.

"These twins are boys," I told him confidently. "I can feel it in my gut. Which incidentally is pretty close to where they're cooking for the next few months. I've felt it since the weekend, that it was a boy... I just didn't know there were two of them."

I could feel Christian laughing silently. It was a really nice feeling. "If you're so sure about that, then why did we just spend the past... however long it was... talking about girl names?"

"Because you started out with girl names. And we're learning about each other," I explained. It was important. I wanted to know how he was thinking and what was important to him. Yes, we were engaged and would be married soon, but we were still getting to know each other.

"So what boy names do you like?" he asked me.

"Well, I definitely want to name one of our boys after my dad. Raymond. Just as a middle name though. The only other man in my life was my grandfather, Carla's dad. His name was Jonas. He went by Joe. Jonas and Elzbieta Vilkas moved to Chicago and eventually became Joe and Betty Wilkes."

"What, were they in witness protection or something?" Christian asked.

"No, they just wanted to... I don't know... fit in. They wanted names that sounded more... American to them. But I definitely prefer the name Jonas over the name Joe."

"I'm not sure I like the name Jonas. I had a principal named Mr. Jonas when I was in middle school."

"I take it you didn't like him?" I asked unnecessarily, given his tone.

"Well, he expelled me, so... no," he answered.

"Woah," I responded. "Why?"

I could feel Christian shrug. "Fighting. I was an angry, pubescent, hormonal, confused kid, who freaked out when anybody touched him."

"Didn't he try to help you?" I asked about the idiot principal. "You needed counseling, not expulsion."

"He probably did," Christian conceded. "And I'd been in counseling my entire life. It didn't help. And I think that was my third fight that semester. I broke the other kid's nose. Mr. Jonas told me I was a waste of resources. He wanted me out of there."

"Holy shit," I said. "So, I guess the name Jonas is out then?"

Christian replied, "Not necessarily. Do you remember him? Your grandfather?"

"A little. I mainly remember all the stories Grandma told me about him. He was a character. He could be the serious professor that he was, but with the family, he was a nut. Seriously into practical joking, and he had a nickname for everyone. My nickname, incidentally, was Annie Oakley. He claimed I was going to make history. Grandma reminded me of that throughout my childhood, anytime I got into trouble for not behaving lady-like. She encouraged me to be the leader that I was, and according to her, Grandpa would have done the same. She loved him a lot. Never even considered having another relationship after he died, even though she wasn't that old. I was five, so she was forty-five."

"Your grandma was only forty years older than you?" Christian asked.

"Yep," I affirmed. "Carla was only eighteen when she married Frank Lambert, my birth father. And they _had to_ get married, if you know what I mean. She turned nineteen before I was born. And Grandma had Mom pretty young too. Grandpa came on a student visa for his PhD. He studied at Northwestern. Grandma was a few years younger than him, and she never completed her degree. She came as his spouse and got pregnant almost immediately. She joked that it was the Chicago effect. They were happy though, because it meant their child would be an American citizen, and they really wanted to stay here. Grandma gave birth to Mom and focused on learning English. Then, after Grandpa finished his PhD, he got a post-doc research position at Arizona State University. Mom was around five years old when they moved to Arizona. They were there a few years before Grandpa got a job here at Seattle Pacific University. Mom spent all her teenage years here, and my grandparents loved it here."

"How did he die?" Christian asked.

"Lung cancer," I answered. "To be as intelligent as he was, he was pretty stupid about smoking, at least when he was younger. By the time I was born, he'd quit, but it was too late. He made me promise, repeatedly, when I was little, that I would never smoke. I've never wanted to."

"I'm glad. Smoking is a nasty habit. But I have my own reasons for hating cigarettes, as you know."

I sighed, not wanting to think about the horrible way Christian got his scars. "Anyway, we don't need to name one of our babies Jonas. Not if you don't like the name."

"What about your birth dad?" Christian asked. "His name was Frank, right?"

"Yeah, he died a day after I was born," I answered. "Apparently my mom went through some pretty serious depression after that, apparently a lot more than just the postpartum stuff that women often go through. Combined with the grief from losing Frank, she just couldn't cope."

"Holy shit, it's uncanny how much we have in common in that regard."

"Yeah, I know," I acknowledged. "I realized it when Grandma Liz told us about Ella and Tom. The difference is that my grandma was there to raise me, whereas Grandma Liz was going through her own shit."

Christian sighed, and I could see he didn't want to dwell on it when he asked, "Anyway, Frank. Do you like that name?"

"Not at all," I answered. "And I don't know much about him. It hurt Mom too much to talk about him."

"He couldn't have been too bad if your mom was in love with him," Christian said.

"Well, that's not entirely true. She was in love with husband number three. At least she thought she was. But I don't think my dad was like him. Grandma didn't tell me much, but whenever I asked about him, she would always tell me that he was a good man. She said he was good to my mom, and that he would have loved me. Apparently he was there when I was born but only had a 24-hour leave so had to get back to Fort Lewis. He cried when he held me, and cried again when he had to leave. Then he was killed in an accident the next day."

"So, you don't like Frank, but what about Franklin?" Christian asked.

"Well, yeah, that was his full name, but no to naming our son that, because his nickname would still be Frank, or Frankie, which is even worse. Maybe Franklin as a middle name though. I actually like that. Franklin and Raymond are both really good middle names."

Christian sounded happy when he said, "Well, in that case, I think we have middle names for our sons picked out. Raymond and Franklin. I like them both. We just need first names."

"What about Carrick?" I asked.

"No," Christian answered immediately. "I love my dad, but things have been tense between us for a long time. They're only starting to get better, now that you're in the picture. After I dropped out of Harvard... He was so disappointed."

"Christian, you have to know he's gotten over that. He is proud of you," I reminded him.

"I know that now. But I felt... rejected. Anyway, I'd rather name my son after my granddad. Theodore. He's always been there for me. There's no doubt he would have loaned me the money for GEH if Elena hadn't done it first."

"I've always loved the name Theodore," I said quickly, wanting to steer our conversation clear of Elena Lincoln, another dead monster who didn't deserve our thoughts. "Can we call him Teddy?" I asked.

"If that's what you like, then sure," Christian answered.

"Theodore Raymond?" I asked. "Have we named our first born?"

"I think we might have, Princess," he answered. "Theodore Raymond, if they're boys. And just in case you're wrong and it's girls, we have Elizabeth Grace."

"Yes, but I'm not wrong," I told him confidently.

Christian chuckled. "OK, now to boy number two. Middle name, Franklin. We just need a first name."

"Thomas," I said. "Your birth father."

Christian was quiet for a moment, and I could tell he was thinking it over. "Thomas Franklin Grey," he finally said. "OK."

"OK?" I asked. Could it really be that easy?

"Yes, OK. I don't have any bad feelings that I'm trying to work out with Thomas Norwood. I didn't know about him. And apparently, he was a good person who loved Ella, and would have loved me if he'd lived long enough. So yes, I think I can agree to name our second son after him. It makes sense, if his middle name is in honor of your birth father, whom you never knew, then his first name should be in honor of my birth father whom I never knew."

"Thomas Franklin Grey," I repeated. "I like it. More than I expected to. Can we call him Tommy?"

"Sure," Christian agreed. "Teddy and Tommy, until they get old enough to think those names sound too babyish. Elliot called me Chrissy when I was little. When I got old enough, I made him stop. Even gave him a bloody nose for it."

"Damn, you were a violent child," I commented.

"You have no idea," Christian muttered. I hoped our children didn't inherit that trait from their father, but I wasn't going to say that to him. He was quiet, probably thinking the same thing. I needed to lighten the mood again.

"I just thought of something," I said, feeling amused. "Thomas Hardy."

Christian was quiet for a moment, but then he started chuckling. "I'd forgotten about that. I introduced myself to you as Thomas Hardy when we met at the munch."

"How ironic that we're planning to name one of our children Thomas," I said.

"Ironic indeed," Christian agreed. "But you can be damn sure that we will never have a daughter named Daisy."

"Hey, I resent that," I joked. "I love the name Daisy, and I love daisies."

"I know," Christian responded. "And I'll buy you daisies for the rest of our lives, but I will never agree to name our daughter that name. Maybe a pet."

"You want to have a dog or cat named Daisy?" I asked.

"Someday, maybe," Christian answered. "Or a goldfish."

I giggled. "You want a pet goldfish?" I asked.

"I don't want a fucking pet at all," he said grumpily. "But I have a feeling we'll give in and get one someday. After our kids beg us for one."

I giggled again. "Christina already has you wrapped around her little finger," I told him. "She'll most likely be the one who convinces you to get a puppy."

Christian sighed contentedly. "I love the sound of your giggle," he said sleepily.

"Mmmm, sweet dreams, Sunshine." We both needed to sleep.

"You haven't called me that in a long time," he said. "I love you, Princess."

"I love you, too, Sunshine."

The next thing I saw was a beautiful park, where Christian was pushing a laughing Christina on a swing while I pushed a smiling little copper-haired boy in a baby swing. Nestled to my chest in a baby carrier was his sleeping twin.

Suddenly, the air was filled with the sound of a gunshot, and before I knew what was happening, Christian lay bleeding on the ground next to me.

"Christian!" I screamed. Suddenly, all three children were also screaming.

Then, a sinister voice spoke, giving me chills. "Did you really think you'd be free of me, bitch? You will never be free of me. I've come for you. For all of you."

"No! You're dead, you bastard!" I shouted.

He pointed at the ground where Christian lay. "Yeah, so is he," Hyde sneered. "And you're next, right after these brats."

"No!"

"Anastasia!" Christian's voice called me. How was that possible, when he was lying there, dead?

"Ana, wake up!" he called more urgently.

I blinked my eyes, and when I opened them, I was back in our bedroom, in our new house, being held by a very alive Christian. I clung to him, sobbing into his shoulder.

"Shh... it's OK, Princess. It was just a dream. You're OK."

"He killed you, Christian," I cried. "We were playing with our kids at a park, and Hyde shot you."

"It'll never happen, Princess," Christian assured me soothingly. "Hyde's dead. And you know we'd never take our children to an unsecured public park, so nobody else will ever do anything like that either."

I could feel my heart rate slowing down, getting more regulated. Finally, I raised my head and looked at him. I asked calmly, "Where were you? I don't usually have nightmares when you're with me."

"It's almost 8 a.m., baby," he answered. "I've been up for a couple of hours. The only reason I haven't left for work yet is because I was on a conference call with Ros and some of our other executives discussing the merger."

"I should get dressed and come into work with you," I suggested, even though my brain was still foggy from the nightmare.

"Not today, Princess," Christian answered. "You've worked too hard the past couple of days. You aren't getting enough rest. And besides, Derrick and Kelly are arriving later today, so one of us needs to be here to get them settled. In fact, I was hoping you could go with Prescott and Wesson to pick them up at the airport."

"OK," I replied. He was right, I needed to pace myself, and I needed to allow him to take care of me. Besides, I needed to make sure our guest rooms downstairs were ready for them. This was going to be our first Christmas together as a family, and it was going to be the best Christmas ever. I would make sure of it.


	53. Ch 53: Hanging Out With Isaac (CPOV)

Chapter 53: Hanging out with Isaac (Christian's POV)

"So, I've been wanting to ask you something," Isaac said as he chewed a mouthful of his turkey club sandwich. He was seated across from me having lunch at my favorite deli around the corner from Grey House. Today, he'd been shadowing me at work. Since his winter break from school had already started, he'd asked me if he could observe some of the goings on at GEH, soon to be Ismintis-Grey. Things were crazy with the official merger being only a few days away, but I didn't mind having him as my shadow. He was trying to decide between business and pre-law as his major when he started college in a few months. Until recently spending so much time with Dad, he'd planned on business, but Dad's legal work had sparked an interest in him. But Isaac reasoned that spending a few hours observing me at work would help him make a better educated decision. Honestly, I thought he just wanted to spend time with me, and I was OK with that. More than OK. I knew that Mom and Dad were talking about adopting Isaac, and if they could get the courts to terminate the parental rights of Isaac's excuse for a sperm donor, then it would be smooth sailing from there, and Isaac would be my little brother.

I figured his question was work related. "What's up?" I asked.

He reminded me, "You told me once that there was hope for me... you know, in the area of... girls. Relationships. But I've never even kissed a girl... outside of... her." Isaac shuddered as he alluded to Elena Lincoln before he continued, "So, what I want to ask you is kind of personal. How did you...? I mean... I know you went the whole Dom route and had subs. I watched your interview with Kate Kavanagh, so I know about all that. But I don't really want to be a Dom." He was quick to add, "I don't want to be a sub either. Never again. I don't want to do the BDSM thing at all. I grew up with that, with my mom being a submissive and all. I'm not even remotely interested in any of that shit... no offense. I just want to be... me. No, I'm not sure that's true. I want to be normal. But how do I... move on? How do I have a normal relationship?"

I was probably staring at the poor kid like he had an extra head. And then, I couldn't help but see the humor in the situation. I chuckled probably louder than I should have, being in a public place. Then, I realized two things. One, there were too many people around us for us to continue this conversation here, and two, Isaac thought I was laughing at him. His face fell, and he looked embarrassed.

I shoved the last bite of sandwich in my mouth, chewed and swallowed, and then stood up. "Come on, little bro, let's continue this conversation in the privacy of my office."

Having already finished his lunch, Isaac stood and followed me out of the deli without speaking. By this sagging shoulders, I could see that I'd hurt his feelings.

Back in my office, I told him, "Isaac, I wasn't laughing at you. Well, not really. Maybe at the absurdity of your question. Not that your question was absurd. Shit, I'm getting this wrong. I was surprised that you asked me of all people about how to have a normal relationship. Have we met? I'm Christian fucking Grey, and I'm fifty shades of fucked up. I've never had a normal relationship in my life. Sure, I love Ana and would lay my life down for her and for my daughter, but I'm figuring this shit out as we go."

"Fifty shades of fucked up?" Isaac repeated. "I like that. Can I use it?" He didn't wait for me to respond before he continued. "If you're fifty shades, Christian, I'm a hundred shades. You realize that my mom was the sub of one of the vilest human beings on the face of the planet when she got pregnant with me, right? She married him because he insisted that 'his son' wouldn't be born a bastard, but he always treated me like one. And even though they divorced when I was little, she ALWAYS belonged to that bastard. Or to whomever he wanted to give her for however long it lasted."

"Did any of them ever hurt you," I asked. I didn't think he had the same scars that I did, but I wanted to be sure.

"Not physically," he answered. "A couple of them knocked me around on occasion, but when that happened, Mom safe-worded, and their arrangement always ended soon after that. But mentally... yeah, I guess. No offense, but I don't see the attraction you have to the lifestyle. The Doms that my mom had were all assholes."

I answered honestly, "I think my attraction to BDSM is part of my fucked-up-ness. But I've learned a few things from friends involved in the lifestyle, and now I know that the way Elena practiced it with us was not right. It was abuse. And the way I've practiced it with my subs was also not right, and now I regret all that, even if they did consent to it. BDSM is not supposed to be an avenue for abuse, but it was for me, and I suspect that all that you've ever been exposed to was also abusive shit. I don't blame you for not wanting it. You're not a hundred shades of fucked up, Isaac. If you want to have a normal relationship, you can."

He scoffed. "Did you know that Mrs. Lincoln was not the one to take my virginity? I bet she took yours, didn't she?"

I loosened my shirt collar. Damn, it was getting hot in here. But I felt I needed to keep being honest with Isaac instead of telling him to mind his own damn business. "She did," I muttered.

Then Isaac proceeded to tell me the story of his own deflowering. "When I turned fourteen, Daddy Dearest paid us a visit. It wasn't that unusual for him to visit on my birthday, and bring me some kind of useless shit. On my twelve birthday, he gave me a box of condoms. I was twelve! I wasn't ignorant about sex, by any means, but I wasn't ready to do it! On my thirteenth, he gave me a copy of the Kama Sutra. The Kama fucking Sutra! I mean, it was an English translation, not the original Sanskrit, but I didn't really get it until I started looking at all the illustrations. I was too young to be exposed to that shit."

I tried to lighten the mood, foolishly, by saying, "Well, at least when the time comes for you to have that normal relationship, you know all those positions..."

Isaac cut me off. "Seriously? Was that the way I should have learned? At age thirteen?"

"No, I guess not," I conceded.

Isaac continued, "Anyway, then, on my fourteenth birthday, he showed up with a girl my age. Just a couple of months older than me. Turns out, she was his slave. I didn't understand it at the time, how she could be in the lifestyle at that age. If I'd understood it then, I would have reported the son of a bitch to the police, but I was really naive. And the girl seemed... eager. She didn't act like she was being forced into anything against her will. Looking back, now I know that he had instructed her to seduce me. I wasn't exactly unwilling, but I didn't know what the hell I was doing. But she did, and she showed me what to do. She even showed me how to put on a condom. And the worst part of all of it was that the son of a bitch recorded it. I didn't even know it until a few months later, when Mrs. Lincoln took me under her wing. It was his idea. The son of a bitch put her up to taking me as her submissive. He wanted her to make a man out of me. That was some fucked-up way to make a boy into a man!"

"Everything about Elena Lincoln was fucked up, Isaac. But that part of your life is behind you," I reminded him. "You have your whole life ahead of you. You're acing high school, and there's no question that you'll get into Harvard. There will be girls. Don't push yourself too hard. You're still... you still have shit to work through, but you are doing it. I don't have any doubt that your college experience will be more normal than mine was."

"I don't intend to drop out, if that's what you're getting at," he said with a smirk. Smart aleck.

"Yeah well, I don't regret that... for the most part," I told him honestly. "But my relationship with my dad has never been great, and that made it a whole hell of a lot worse. I'm not sure if he'll ever fully forgive me."

"Are you fucking serious?" he asked. "Carrick almost worships you. He blames himself for so much shit that he didn't have any control over. It's like he sees you in me and he's trying to correct all his past mistakes that he made with you by helping me."

"Does that bother you?" I asked him. I knew he was speaking the truth... I'd noticed it myself. But Isaac wasn't me, and Dad needed to realize that.

"No, I get it, man. I respect him. Hell, I want to be like him. Minus the mistakes. But really, how could he have known? How could he or Grace have known? I mean, about Mrs. Lincoln... and you."

I noticed that he'd brought up Elena a couple of times now, so he was clearly dealing well with what had happened if he could say her name. I decided to ask him. "How are you doing, Isaac? I mean, with what happened with Elena? How's the therapy going?"

He contemplated before answering me. "Did you know I watched the video of... when I killed her?" he asked.

"What?" I shouted. "Who in the hell thought that would be a good idea?"

"Flynn," he answered. "And it was. I could see clearly that I didn't mean to do it. I don't feel guilty anymore for killing her. She damn near killed me first. And the video showed that it was clearly an accident. Not even self defense. An accident. The gun went off. I didn't pull the trigger, not even to stop her from hurting me. I'm not sure I even pulled the trigger at all, or if she did. Either way, it wasn't my fault."

"You're right," I agreed. "I saw it, and what you just described was exactly what I saw."

He nodded. "Yeah, and I can talk about it now, so I must be doing OK. I still have nightmares about it. About her. But while I'm awake, I'm good. Except that I don't know how to have a normal relationship with a girl. Hell, I want to have sex. Normal sex. With a girl. But nothing I've experienced up to now has been normal."

"When you meet the right girl, I think you'll figure it out," I told him.

"Is that how it's been for you with Ana?" he asked.

I snorted, which turned into a chuckle. "Fifty shades, remember?" I asked him. "You said you watched Kate's interview of us, so you know how we met... and I didn't know who the fuck she was."

"That's right... a BDSM munch," he recalled. "But you also said she isn't your submissive. Do you or don't you have a Dom/sub thing doing on?"

Damn, that was personal. But I was determined to be frank with him. "No, we don't except for on occasion, when we both decide that we want to play. I think Ana's always seen it as role-playing. For me, it's always been... different... with her than with any of my past subs."

Isaac nodded again, looking pensive. "I know you say you're fifty shades of fucked up and all, but you and Ana seem so... normal. I mean, I loved my mom, and I don't want to speak ill of her. She always took care of me. But it was a hell of a way to grow up. Until Carrick and Grace, I've never really seen what I'd consider a healthy relationship up close. But you and Ana seem to have a pretty healthy relationship, and if you're really as fucked up as you say you are, I just want to know how you did it? Or how you're doing it."

I sighed. Did Ana and I have a healthy relationship? As healthy as I knew how to be. It was for damn sure what I wanted with her. "Like I said earlier, when you meet the right girl, you'll know. When I met Ana, I knew I had to have her, but I didn't know I could do vanilla. But it didn't take long. She joked about popping my vanilla cherry. And then... I craved it. She makes me want to be a better man, and it's been that way from the beginning. And then... I found out about Christina. Being a father... it changes everything. There's nothing I wouldn't do for that little girl. For both of them."

I didn't mention it to Isaac, because nobody knew yet, but in my mind, I added, "and my twins." I wondered if Ana was right, that they were sons. I didn't mind either way, but I liked the idea of sons. Teddy and Tommy, as we'd named them the night before. I continued speaking to Isaac, "My purpose in life is different than it was just a few months ago. Now, all I want to do is love them and keep them safe. Damn, I sound like a real sap, don't I?"

"Yeah, but I'm a sap too, so I get it," Isaac answered. "Want to know a secret? I like to read Jane Austin and shit like that. And I like chick flicks. My favorite movie is The Notebook."

I chuckled and said, "A word of advice. Never admit that to another dude. But I think chicks are going to really like that about you."

"Dearest Daddy didn't think so," Isaac said bitterly. "Of course, Mom told him. And it was one of the things that he wanted Mrs. Lincoln to... change about me. I think he was afraid I was gay because he thought my tastes were too... girly. So what if I had have been gay? There's nothing wrong with that, but I'm not. Just... a romantic. Is it so wrong that I want to fall in love."

"Nothing wrong with that at all," I answered hesitantly. I hesitated because he was still so young. "Just... know that it might not happen for a while. And in the meantime, you should have some fun. Use the rest of high school to heal from all the shit you've been through recently, and then when you get to Harvard, just let yourself live a little. Get through college, at least your undergraduate degree, before you find a girl to... you know... really fall in love with."

Isaac smirked at me. "You know, I'm really nothing like you at all, right?" he told me confidently.

"What does that mean?" I asked.

"I know it might seem like it, because I've spent the past few years planning out my future. I can see why people think I'm like you when they look at that. Plus I look a little like you. And I've been really fucking serious about academics, the way you are about business. I needed to get into Harvard. That's my dream. It was business that I wanted to pursue, just like you, but now... I think I really want to study law."

"You realize you could do both, right?" I suggested. "You could focus on corporate law."

"I could, but I don't think I want to," he answered. "I can see myself as a defense lawyer. An advocate. Or maybe... I don't know... somehow helping victims like... like that girl who I gave my virginity to. Peyton was her name. Anyway, we're getting off topic. I'm trying to tell you how I'm not like you. You seem to think you can plan out every fucking aspect of life. Although... come to think of it... how's that working out for you?"

"OK, smart ass," I responded. "What's your point?"

"Just an observation," he answered with a smirk that matched mine. "Anyway, back on topic, there are some things in life that I know I can't plan, and I don't want to try to. I'm nervous as hell because I don't want to fuck up when the... opportunity presents itself. That's why I wanted to talk to you. This conversation has been more helpful than you probably realize."

I wasn't sure how the hell to respond to that. "Umm... great. So, do you want to go have dinner with us this evening? My cousins from Michigan arrived today. You can meet them."

"Sure," Isaac readily agreed.

"Good. Now, I've got work I need to finish before we can leave, so shut up and let me work."

Isaac smirked at me again. "Yes, sir," he replied snarkily. I was fucking glad to see him this relaxed. There was no question in my mind that I already saw him as my little brother, and he thought of me the same way, as his big brother.

Something he'd mentioned earlier stuck with me, so I asked him to read something while I worked: Ken and Raina's business plan that Ana had shared with me by email. Isaac had said he might want to be an advocate for victims of human trafficking like the girl who had taken his virginity. I wondered how much he knew about it from his experience growing up as the son of Joseph fucking Horowitz. Of course, I didn't tell him who Raina was, and certainly not that she had once been in the same place as the girl he'd mentioned, the slave of his excuse for a father. I wondered how much he knew about his sperm donor's crimes. But that was a conversation for another day.

I spent another couple of hours working, mainly figuring out details related to the merger. Ana and I had agreed to put off any potential acquisitions for the rest of the year, until after our merger. But there was still research to do to prepare for the deals we would be making in a few weeks.

Between emails and research, I also talked with Elliot, who had just returned from his honeymoon in time for Christmas. I had asked him to take a look at the garage at our new house, which he had earlier today, and I was happy with his report that it was totally doable to build an addition onto the back of it, doubling the number of cars it would hold. Instead of the 5-car garage we currently had, with the two-bedroom apartment above it for Taylor and Gail, we would have a 10-car garage, with cars parked in tandem, and we'd be able to add a master bedroom suite to Taylor's apartment on the second floor, resulting in a 3-bedroom, 2-bathroom home above the garage. Best of all, Taylor and Gail wouldn't have to move out during the construction, except for about a week or two when the back wall would be reconstructed. We could put them in one of our guest rooms during that time.

I knew we already needed the garage space, as Gail's car, along with any of our other staff's personal cars, had to be parked in the driveway for now. Elliot assured me he had a crew that could begin work immediately after Christmas. The garage was already full, with my two Audi SUVs and my R8 Spyder, and Ana's Tesla and Rolls Royce, and I had already purchased two new cars for Ana, one for Christmas that was already in my possession (hidden from Ana in the Escala garage), and another that would arrive before our wedding.

I hadn't forgotten that Ana wanted a sports car, so for Christmas this year, I'd purchased her her very own R8. The bright blue color reminded me of her eyes when she came. I couldn't wait to give her this car, which I'd ordered weeks ago, but I was determined that she wasn't going to get it until Christmas morning, with a big red bow on the hood. I knew she was going to love it, and I could hardly wait to see the excitement in her eyes.

But I'd ordered the R8 before we'd learned she was pregnant with twins. She wouldn't be able to enjoy it for a while, especially when her baby bump started really growing. And besides, with twins on the way and an almost 2-year old already, Ana needed a bigger car. I didn't want to do the cliche mini-van thing (that was so not us), but I also didn't think Ana would appreciate another Audi, in addition to the two SUVs I already owned, and now two R8 Spyders. Instead, I went with a Mercedes GLS SUV. I had it custom built, with a reinforced body and bullet-proof glass. I even got them to include a hybrid engine since I knew Ana's affinity for environmentally-conscious designs. I couldn't get away from the blue exterior for Ana, but the Mercedes was a dark midnight blue, very unlike the bright Audi Spyder. The Mercedes held seven people, so there would be plenty of room for three carseats for our children, both of us, and security. Of course, we'd have additional security in another car when we all went anywhere together.

With twins on the way, I realized that we'd need to hire more security, and we'd need more vehicles for them too. I talked with Elliot about adding a building on our property near the main road. I wanted it to not only provide more garage space for vehicles that we would purchase in the future but also a few apartments for staff. Elliot promised to start drafting a plan with my specifications.

It was after 5 p.m. when I found Isaac, who had finished his reading and was now playing on his laptop, and we met Taylor and Perez at the elevator. On our way home, I asked Isaac his thoughts on Ken and Raina's business plan, and we talked the rest of the way home about it.

"Seems... dangerous," he told me. "But totally doable. And needed. The thing is, though... I'm not sure of all the girls who are... you know... in it... I'm not sure if they all want to be... rescued."

"What do you mean?" I asked. "Why do you say that?" Of course, I knew his words were true, but I was wondering what was going on with him.

"Well... the girl I told you about, Peyton. She was into it. She seemed to enjoy herself."

"But Isaac," I argued, "If she was brought into that life when she was younger and then brainwashed, it might be the only way she knows. She may not realize she has a choice."

"Or she may not care. She may not want to have a choice," Isaac responded.

I contemplated my next words before I said them because I didn't want to hurt him, but we'd been so open earlier, I felt it was not going too far now. "Is this about your mother?" I asked him.

He responded by glancing out the window and watching the city pass by for a few moments. I began to regret my words, but then he surprised me.

"No, it's not about Mom, although I'm not sure, in hindsight, if she knew she had a choice. I don't think she knew any other way to live. She'd been in the lifestyle since she was young... younger than I was when Mrs. Lincoln... you know. Mom was always a slave to that bastard, and had been since her early teens. But what I said earlier... that was about... me."

"You?" I pushed him.

He explained, "Being brought up the way I was... I've realized how easy it would have been to just... you know... stay in that life. I could have had my own slaves. I could have fucked anytime I wanted to. All I had to do was say the words to Daddy Dearest, and I could have been a Dom with as many subs as I wanted. A Master, with slaves ready to service me any time I wanted my cock sucked. It's what he wanted from me. There were plenty of times when I was tempted. But... I knew it was wrong, and I didn't want to do it. I want a girl to like me for me, not because I have control over her, and she doesn't have a choice. Even if she doesn't want to have a choice."

Now it was my turn to look out the window and think about his words. Holy shit, I thought my life was fucked up, but Isaac had not been exaggerating earlier when he said he was a hundred shades. And yet, he'd chosen something different. He wanted that Harvard education, and he wanted love. I was immensely proud of him.

I decided to turn the focus back to the business plan for Ken and Raina's nonprofit. "OK, so other than the girls who don't want out, what are your thoughts. You know there will be girls who do want out. This organization is for them. Does it seem feasible to you?"

"Totally," he answered without hesitation. "I like how it focuses on teaching them social skills that they wouldn't have learned. And the education piece. That's important."

"So... is this the kind of thing you're thinking about for your future? Would an organization like this interest you?"

"Yeah, maybe," he answered hesitantly. "I don't know, let me get through the next four years first. Well, seven years, at least. I have to get through my undergrad, and then Law School."

We talked the rest of the way home about Isaac's education plans. I was surprised to learn that he was actually going to finish high school a year early. His birthday wasn't until September, so by the time he turned 18, he'd already be at Harvard. I recalled that I had already turned 19 before my Freshman year started. Isaac would be one of the youngest Freshmen. I hoped it didn't make him a target.

When we walked into our house, I can only say that I felt... home. It even smelled like home. Either Gail was baking apple pie or Ana had scented candles burning. I was soon to discover... it was both.

We walked into a scene right out of a Normal Rockwell painting. Ana had indeed picked up Derrick and Kelly at the airport earlier in the day, and the 12-foot Christmas tree that I'd ordered for our great room had been delivered and was partially decorated. Traditional Christmas music was playing, and Ana was on her knees in front of the tree helping Christina with tinsel and some kind of sparkly things that I'm sure Ana determined to be child-friendly. I was glad to see that Christina was getting more stuff on the tree than in her mouth. I looked back and Ana and couldn't help but admire her tits, which appeared to be a little larger than they'd been this morning. I wanted to lift up her baggy sweater to see if her baby bump was showing yet, but I knew she wouldn't want me to do that in front of people. It would have to wait until I could get her alone.

Kelly got my attention as she swayed on the ladder she was standing near the top of. She'd reached over too far to hang an ornament that Derrick had unwrapped and handed her, but she caught her balance and righted herself in time.

"If you keep doing that, you're going to fall, damn it!" Derrick shouted at her. "Don't make me come up there and smack you!"

"I'd like to see you try," Kelly shouted back at him.

I glanced over at Isaac and saw that his jaw was almost on the floor. Oh, shit. I followed his line of sight back to Kelly and noticed for the first time how she was dressed. Tight yoga pants that showed off her ass too much, and a tight t-shirt that stretched across her tits and lifted to reveal her stomach when she reached up to hang an ornament. I wondered for a moment if I should say something to her about the way she was dressed. Was it my place? I was, after all, still getting to know my cousins, and I didn't want to piss her off. But Isaac was literally drooling, and he hadn't even met her yet.

Before I had a chance to say anything to Isaac or anyone else, Ana looked up and saw us. "Christian! You're here! Look, Christina, Daddy's home!"

"Dadda!" Christina threw down the sparkily shit and ran towards me. I reached my arms out for her, picked her up, and threw her up in the air before I held her close. Her giggle was my reward. God, I loved my girl.

I held Christina and walked closer to the tree, noticing how Isaac was still staring at Kelly unashamedly. Now, Kelly was staring back at him, and she looked interested. I motioned to Isaac with my free hand.

"Come, let me introduce you," I told him. I looked up at Kelly and then at Derrick. "This is my little brother, Isaac," I told them. Then I looked back at Isaac and said, "These are my cousins, Derrick and Kelly."

"C-c-cousins," Isaac stuttered. "So you're not... you're... you're brother and sister?" His voice sounded hopeful. Shit, he thought they were a couple.

Derrick answered him, "Yeah, she's my sister. Why do you ask?" Derrick looked at Isaac like he was sizing him up. Then he glanced at me and winked. Isaac didn't catch it because he was still staring at Kelly, who was still perched up on the ladder, showing off her ass in those tight pants. She still hadn't spoken, but she was smiling down at Isaac, who had moved to stand under the ladder.

"Umm... hi! I'm Isaac," he called up to her.

Kelly smiled wider and said, "I'm Kelly, and I'm coming down." She started to climb down the ladder, and I noticed that Isaac was totally checking out her ass and tits. Derrick noticed too, but he didn't seem as bothered as I would have been if a guy had been looking at Mia the way Isaac was looking at Kelly. I wasn't sure what to feel. She was my cousin, but I hadn't grown up with her, so I didn't feel the same protective instinct that I did with Mia. And Isaac was my brother... well, he would be soon. I felt protective of him. For that reason, I was glad Derrick wasn't being the jerk that I would have been in his shoes.

On her way down, Kelly apparently missed a step on the ladder, because the next thing I knew, she was falling, and then, she was in Isaac's arms. Did I mention that Isaac worked out, and he was well built? He didn't have any problems catching Kelly and holding her in his arms. Then, before any of us had a chance to say a word, they were kissing.

I glanced at Ana, who was staring at them with the same shock that I'm sure mirrored mine. Then, I glanced at Derrick, who looked amused.

"Umm... who did you say this guy is?" he asked me. "You said brother, right? But you only have one brother, and he's older than you. And married. So... who is this guy?" He sounded more curious than anything.

"My parents are in the process of adopting him," I explained. Meanwhile, as we conversed, Isaac and Kelly were still kissing.

Then, in what appeared to be slow motion, they broke the kiss and looked in each other's eyes. Both of them appeared to be in shock. Isaac carefully placed Kelly on the floor and made sure she was stabile before his hands left her arms. Only then did he glance around and notice all the eyes on him. Immediately, his face flushed crimson.

"Umm... shit! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean... Oh my God! Shit!" He was so flustered it was almost comical, but I couldn't laugh at him, because I knew how humiliated he felt. Derrick, of course, didn't know anything about Isaac's background, so he didn't hold back his chuckle.

Kelly wasn't laughing though. "It's OK," she told him breathlessly. "You don't need to apologize. You caught me. I could have broken a bone. You... saved me."

Isaac only nodded at her, still looking deeply embarrassed. "Excuse me," he said quietly before he took off, down the stairs.. and I was sure he'd head out the back door and down towards the lake.

I looked questioningly at Ana. Should I go after him? Should I stay and talk with Derrick and Kelly, who I'd barely even greeted yet?

"Go," Ana answered my question for me. I nodded at her, but I turned back to Derrick and Kelly before I followed after Isaac. "Welcome to Seattle. We'll catch up over dinner. Hopefully, I'll be able to convince Isaac to come back inside, after he calms down."

"I hope so," Kelly said softly. She actually reached up and touched her lips.

Derrick sniggered at her. "So my baby sister finally had her first kiss," he joked.

Kelly smiled and responded, "Not the first, but definitely the best."

I left then to follow after Isaac, knowing that he needed me, and also knowing that it wasn't my place to tell Kelly or Derrick that, based on what he'd told me earlier today, that actually had been Isaac's first kiss, not counting Elena Lincoln, which was shit they didn't need to know. And based on the rest of our conversation from earlier, I was not surprised that Isaac was now freaking the fuck out.


End file.
